freq13diary

[freq13diary]

Surrounded by lights and sounds, in a place that’s become a map full of meaning for you… and somehow, I feel like I’ve been invited into your beautiful world.

Feels like we’re in the most anticipated play of the year—

Wait, no—maybe it’s just the high school auditorium.

So I look around for my girl.

That’s right, she’s the county queen.

She’s got a poet’s heart but she’s also the mastermind behind our story.

I walk through flowers, but none of them are like her.

The view’s amazing, sure, but my eyes are already locked on her.

Then suddenly, her presence pulls my gaze upward.

There she is—so expressive for someone so beautiful.

I keep walking and find myself standing off to the side of the whole scene.

I wait—like my heart already knows something’s about to happen.

Then she walks in, makes her entrance.

There she is.

And my body reacts like it’s the very first time.

Wait—of course it is.

We were both waiting for this.

Damn... someone whispers in my ear:

"And she's pretty, in her little black dress."

Then it’s like time just... freezes.

Next thing I know, I’m in another scene.

Back at the beginning.

I’d been locked away for years.

I stepped out to take a spin around the world—

and yeah, it’s still the same.

But something about that night stopped me in my tracks.

We went back to basics.

She was in her element.

But something’s different now.

Yeah… just like the first time.

We’re both searching for something,

each from our own side—

you shining, me watching.

We feel alive again.

Like being in love, she says, “For the first time.”

What is this I’m feeling?

Oh… now I get it.

We’re exactly where we’re supposed to be.

Crashing into the unknown.

Lost in all of this, but somehow feeling right at home.

Maybe we just let go.

When did it start?

Maybe love doesn’t care about that.

Now we’re just here, in this moment.

Then you turn your head—just for a second, but it lasts forever—

and your eyes land on that one spot

that’s always just to your left.

Our eyes lock.

And I didn’t even realize it,

but somewhere along the way,

the doubts, the fears, the insecurities—they all slipped away.

Now it’s just you, me… and them.

We’re at the party.

But this?

This is just the beginning.

A moment we share, a light we share—

but that fire in your eyes?

That’s something only I can see.

I wish they could see the whole show…

but this story?

This one’s just ours.

We both smile.

I feel your hand grab mine.

No reason, no explanation.

Just one feeling shared between two people…

and it just lives.

Like the first time.

To be continued…

[freq13diary]

What are you up to this time, missy?

I’m starting to like your little surprises.

Have a lovely afternoon.

[freq13diary]

Now that the noise has finally settled down a bit, I’m gonna take your hand and bring you somewhere special. Yeah, that’s right—let me hold your hands, those soft ones I love so much. They look delicate, but they’re full of energy. I’ll take you to a friend’s ranch out in Texas. We won’t talk about his oil business—nah, definitely not. I just wanna pull you out of your world for a minute, and bring you into the one we’re building together.

You’re still wearing that outfit that goes perfectly with your smile and the green fields. And my favorite part? That little peek of your belly—like you're daring me to get lost in you for a second, with that sweet yet rebellious look. But you know me—I’d rather get lost in the whole view.

After shining all day, I think you've earned an exclusive escape—something worthy of someone like you. So I’m putting you in our new girl: *The Vault*. You’re gonna love the inside and how smooth the engine is—powerful, but quiet as hell. So… what’ll it be? Pearl white or black? You’re right, white goes with your shoes.

While we drive, tell me about your day. Don’t hold back on the details, I really wanna hear it all. Everything you do makes me curious, it’s like a little mystery. And the way you talk… it pulls me right into your lips. Don’t worry, I always listen to what you say, but I gotta focus on the road if we’re gonna make it there safe.

I smile when I feel you grab my hand and start tracing it with your fingers.

"Why are you copying my moves, missy?"

You wondering why I’m not wearing any accessories? No watch, no rings, no chains?

I always dreamed of wearing a thin chain with a ring from the woman I love. And now that I actually can… I need the chain. And the ring. But the ring’s the real deal. 'Cause anyone can just buy stuff—but you? You know the difference between something with meaning and something bought just 'cause you can. That’s why your ring needs a story behind it.

First, we get the rock. Like Dan says, the stone is the soul—it’s gotta represent something real in the person who wears it. Then we design the ring and fit the stone just right. Right now, I’m picturing a gorgeous emerald… but the thing is, you make any color look like a masterpiece.

Once we have the ring, picking the chain is easy—you’ve got the eye for that. And when we have both, I’ll slide the ring on your finger and you’ll wear it for a while. But then I’ll take it back, once it’s soaked in your essence. I’ll take it without you even noticing—maybe during one of those wild moments when logic and control go out the window. I’ll put it on the chain you chose, and I’ll wear it close to me. But no one will ever see it—it’ll be something just for us.

Alright, we’re here.

The huge steel gates open up, and we drive into the property. Just a small part of it, but the view’s already incredible. I stop the car and get out to open your door, helping you step out of our pearl-white ride.

Come on, I’ll take your hand—we gotta hurry. I wanna show you the round pen where they break wild colts. I take off my blazer and toss it over the post-and-rail fence. Then I grab your waist and lift you up, sitting you on the fence. And for a second, I just lose myself in you.

Wild horses running around the pen, green fields all around, but it’s you that brings the whole scene to life. Sitting there, legs crossed, arms around my neck, and our eyes locked in—time just slips away. Your eyes are already telling me to take you to that cozy cabin by the stables, but I’m in the mood to play. So you grin and start walking faster, ducking behind a big tree. You turn back to check if I’m still behind you—but I’m gone.

You shift your gaze—and boom. Too late. I’ve caught you by the waist, spun you around, and pulled you in. You don’t resist—you fall into me, and we tumble to the ground. You on top of me. And somehow, after all that, your little purse is still perfectly in place, looking classy as ever.

I keep getting lost in you, in your eyes. My hands never left your waist. Honestly, I envy your belts—and all the clothes that get to stay there for hours. Sometimes I don’t wanna take my hands off that warm spot… but I’ll settle for you letting me sneak in between your skin now and then.

But right now? We just can’t hold back anymore. Two teens at heart, crashing back into the best decade the universe ever invented—the thirties.

I see you now—strong, beautiful, mature, talented. Do whatever you want with me.

Off in the distance, a pair of young horses stop their peaceful walk and turn to watch. A white mare and a painted stallion, like something out of wild, untamed America.

The rest? That’s your story to tell. Because unlike me… you make it real.

[freq13diary]

After a restless night like this one,

let me see you without the extras—just you, as you are.

And before we finally let our bodies rest,

let me whisper something in your ear:

Lend me your comb,

and smooth out my soul.

Untangle me,

somewhere far from this world.

Tell me I’m not

just dreaming you.

Show me

what we’re really made of—

cause I wanna orbit planets

till I find one that's empty,

one I could move into…

but only if it’s with you.

Now just lend me your dream.

There’s no goodbye—

just rest.

Together.

[freq13diary]

Funny enough, I was just talking to my brother today about Texas, cowboy hats, and boots.

Sometimes I don’t even know how to explain all this.

I wish I could tell you everything is planned or perfectly timed—but the truth is, it all just flows naturally.

The timing, the details, even these words…

They don’t really belong to me.

They’ve always been yours.

What can I tell you tonight?

Not much, really.

You were just you, no more, no less.

And I always knew, sooner or later, you'd find your way back home—on your own.

I feel this mix of pride and emotion every time you reach another milestone.

But more than anything, you make every decision I made years ago feel like it was worth every damn second.

That’s why tonight, I just want to tell you a bit of your own story.

How everything slowly led me to you.

I was hanging out with Mike, having a couple beers at my place.

I’d been living alone for a while, and Mike would swing by now and then just to talk about random stuff—girls, mostly.

That day he showed up all excited because he was seeing a cute girl… even though she kept scolding him.

Maybe she just couldn’t stand Mike’s humor, so she tried to fix him all the time.

Anyway, after a few beers, we went out in his Honda Coupé.

And that’s when I heard that song for the first time—the one that ended up being our prologue:

“Looking for Love” by Johnny Lee.

I said,

“Damn, Mike! What a freaking song. Who the hell showed you that track?

Because there’s no way this came from your playlist.”

We both cracked up—because it was true.

There’s no chance Mike found something with lyrics that deep on his own.

He laughed and said,

“That girl I told you about? She was listening to it one day… and since then, I haven’t stopped.”

That night, Johnny Lee’s melody stuck with me.

I took Mike home—had a lot on my mind, plus we were already feeling the alcohol, and he had a long drive.

After he left, I locked myself in with nothing but silence and that song stuck in my head.

It had been over six years since I even thought about romance.

But something in me kept whispering that someone out there was waiting for me.

So I chose to stay alone… just a little longer.

Well, I spent a lifetime lookin' for you

Single bars and good time lovers were never true

Playing a fool’s game, hopin' to win

And tellin' those sweet lies and losin' again

Everyone else was winning, and I was still waiting.

Everyone had magical romances…

And me? I was still waiting for you.

At parties, people would ask me,

“Who are you looking for in the crowd?”

So I’d just leave.

No point in staying—you weren’t there.

I was lookin’ for love in all the wrong places

Lookin’ for love in too many faces

Searchin’ their eyes

Lookin’ for traces of what I’m dreaming of

Hoping to find a friend and a lover

I’ll bless the day I discover another heart

Lookin’ for love

Call it fate, or call it whatever you want.

But I don’t believe in luck.

Things don’t just “happen.”

I knew you’d show up eventually.

And I was alone then, no love in sight

And I did everything I could to get me through the night

Don’t know where it started or where it might end

I turned to a stranger just like a friend

People told me to kill the desire, to numb the need for a real connection.

But that’s what folks do when they’ve lost hope.

I didn’t.

I kept trusting.

Kept waiting.

And then… I realized—

You were always there.

All those girls kind of looked like you, but none of them were you.

I was lookin’ for love in all the wrong places...

Should I have given up the search?

Someone showed up, but couldn’t handle the test.

Didn’t surprise me.

It always went like that.

Should I have just thrown in the towel?

You came knockin’ on my heart’s door

You’re everything I’ve been looking for

Turns out, when you dream about something and hold on tight to it,

you realize it wasn’t just real—it was dreaming of you too.

But it wasn’t in your world yet.

Because the best things in life… they come with obstacles.

No more lookin’ for love in all the wrong places...

Now I smile.

Because I threw a message into the echo… and it answered me back with a song.

So… what now, kid?

I thought about bending reality in my favor.

But I don’t need to anymore.

Because now—I trust you.

And today… you came back.

Years gathering dust, just waiting to come alive again.

All born from a couple of writings between two strangers

who never stopped believing in love.

He writes… and she brings it to life.

She writes… and turns it into melody.

And he answers back in the only language she truly knows—and speaks like no one else.

In all the wrong places

(Lookin’ for love) in too many faces...

And there she was—

the girl who made me fall in love without even being there.

If that happened from a distance…

I can’t even imagine what’ll happen up close.

Tonight was something else.

Because I didn’t just find her again—

She found herself.

And in doing so…

She found me too.

Between her notes.

Inside her songs.

In that one place that never gives up or shuts down—

the heart that keeps beating with the fire of something that never burns out.

You’re really something else.

I always knew.

[freq13diary]

Ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to her world.

[freq13diary]

That way you show up at 3 a.m. just to sneak off with me…

yeah, it’s kinda becoming our thing.

I don’t let anyone mess with my sleep —

but you?

You’re the exception.

'Cause with you, that’s when I actually rest.

Outside, I can hear the cars passing by,

and way off in the distance,

that old train whistle again...

a train that’s taking me straight to loving you.

“Miss, why does your outfit feel so familiar?”

You still smile like we’re 15,

but something’s different this time —

the train stopped just for us,

and I see you’re holding two tickets.

I don’t care where it takes us.

With you, every ride’s an adventure.

To be continued...

[freq13diary]

Sometimes you just let things flow and go wherever they need to, and I like that about you.

Because even though you work really hard and always show up…

you give me reasons to wanna get lost in you even more.

So, in a room full of people… what’s the first thing I’d do?

I walk up to the guy behind the bar.

“What can I get you tonight?”

“I’m feeling kinda inspired… so give me something strong—

but make sure it leaves a sweet taste in my mouth.”

*(Bartender laughs, all cheeky)*

“I think what you need is…” *(glances toward a certain direction)*

“Good bartenders know what you need before you say it.

I mean, I’m not just anyone. I’ve got high standards.

But you? You’re a whole other level.”

“Alright then, hit me with something to start.”

But then… that song starts playing in the background—

the one that cousin X,

that loudmouth with good taste,

dropped last night on some forgotten little profile.

I take my drink… and suddenly, I’m not 34 anymore.

I’m 17 again in two seconds flat.

🎶

*Don’t go, don’t go so easy*

*Don’t go, don’t go and leave me*

*Don’t go, don’t go so easy*

*Don’t go, go...*

🎶

Yep… I’m wearing the leather jacket I still haven’t bought,

but plan to—just for you.

Café brown or jet black?

Depends on my mood.

Underneath… the classic shirt.

Does it remind you of someone?

Let’s see… it was designed by this lady

with the most reckless, beautiful smile.

Wasn’t her?

Doesn’t matter.

As long as it’s got a piece of her in it, I’m good.

Damn song…

Did they write it about me?

That’s what happens when you fall for the right girl—

the kind that makes your world and your structure

shake like an earthquake Richter himself wouldn’t see coming.

Look at her… sipping her drink.

Looking for someone in the crowd?

Everyone who needs to be here is here.

But who are you looking for in the crowd?

Everyone’s in their own little world.

Wanna crash the party together?

Maybe the drink didn’t cut it.

Yeah, that’s it.

Nothing tastes the same.

I want the sweetness of your lips.

And you?

You wanna taste my poison?

You smile…

because you know you’ve got the antidote.

Always one step ahead.

Looking for him in the crowd?

Wait—

Let’s dance a little more.

Let’s lose ourselves in the party.

He’s not here, but you know how to call him.

Maybe one day you’ll make him real.

Would you like that?

I can tell you’re not scared.

So…

Will you let someone else walk away

with what’s rightfully yours?

Don’t worry.

Let my wind wrap around you

and keep your fire alive.

Let’s join the party.

“I know he’s gonna be there tonight.”

Call him with your mind.

Go ahead—

but maybe the line’s busy.

Because he’s always calling you.

Give me one more smile.

Let me see you shine.

Come on, baby.

Just be you.

Who are you looking for in the crowd?

Yeah…

I know that feeling too.

I hear your voice on the phone

Just tell him he’s in the best hands—

yours, obviously.

I only called to drop off a smile.

There it is.

Wanna join the party?

It’s easier with you.

[freq13diary]

Rainy Day

Rainy day. The air was damp and cool; the rain hadn’t stopped falling since early morning. We woke up from our rest at the usual time, but neither of us wanted to get out of bed just yet. It was still early, but inside the house there was a kind of warmth I can’t quite describe. I just know the fireplace wasn’t on, but the house still held that constant burning fire.

Watching you go from schoolgirl to just a regular girl has become my favorite show. You looked more rested, more at ease—more like yourself. Seeing you in that oversized shirt you sometimes wear to sleep made me want to crawl inside it with you, like a cat diving into a bag. We laughed when we heard the seams tear because we couldn’t both fit inside. But we stayed so close that we lost track of time. You rested your forehead against mine while we remembered that night.

That night

Seeing you show up looking so beautiful and radiant sparked that feeling in me again—that pull to go after you. But I noticed you were tired of walking on eggshells. You looked perfect, but it came at the cost of discomfort. I stood up and walked toward you. I didn’t rush to kiss you; this time, I just took your hand, and we made our way to the couch, step by step, no hurry.

Once we got there, I sat you on my lap, but I didn’t focus on my desire. I just hugged you and wanted to breathe in your scent while I listened to the heartbeat beneath your chest. You were really tired—you leaned your head next to mine and closed your eyes. Then you asked about your bag. You hadn’t even noticed when I took it off and slung it around my neck, resting it on my back. You liked how the long strap looked like a necklace on my chest. When I leaned back into the sofa, the strap tightened a bit, almost choking me. You started playing with it, trying to loosen it, but both our weight made it hard. Then you used your lips and teeth to bite it, still trying to free it. But I just let myself go, caught in the warmth of your lips. I responded by biting a little braid from your hair and then nibbling on one of your soft ears with my mouth.

When I opened my eyes, I noticed how swollen your feet were—screaming for attention. So I laid you down on the couch, but you hugged me and wouldn’t let me focus, pulling me toward you without even trying. I stayed a little longer, listening to what had happened that night, until your face showed a hint of pain when the top of your foot brushed against my knee. I sat up and moved your feet, still wearing those stunning heels. I took them off one by one, and peace returned. I noticed how red they were and all I could think was to kiss both feet, to give them a real sense of rest.

Little rituals

Now I had the whole road clear. My desires and temptation were trying to win, but the way you looked at me just made me want to see you truly rest. I got up, made your favorite tea, and brought with me that homemade lavender oil I brought back from Japan. I remembered how it helped relax bruised skin—your feet would love it.

Before going back to you, I placed a vinyl on the old record player I had fixed for you. Funny how we had a melody for every specific moment.

I sat down. You were lying there, legs stretched out, slightly reclined, sipping from that one special cup that used to be mine—until you loved it so much it became yours. You looked at me and asked me to take the first sip. I replied:

—Are you trying to steal my lines?

—When I ask you to, it’s to sweeten the drink. If I sip first, I’ll ruin the taste. It’ll go bitter, like a deadly poison.

And I let out a sarcastic smile.

—Then if you want me to let you touch and take care of my feet, you’ll have to do as I say and follow my lead. Besides, I’m immune to your poison.

That’s when I gave in to your whims. I took a sip of the tea and said:

—It’s actually really good!

You laughed and snatched the cup away from me. I went back to enjoying your soft feet and the oil. I love your hands, but your feet deserve extra care for carrying around everything I love all day long.

That teasing part of you

A moment later, you crossed your legs and leaned toward me—that playful side of you that loves messing with my emotions. You looked at me like I was your prey and said:

—Come on, we both know you want me. Are you really gonna waste this chance?

But once again, I stopped and got lost in your world. And even though you were inviting me closer, my heart just wanted you to rest. So I put an end to your teasing and finished massaging your feet, pressing certain spots on your soles. In minutes, you were out cold.

Ending

I gently removed each of your hanging accessories, one by one. When I finished with your necklace collection, I tried to get up to grab your favorite blanket. But you pulled me back using the bag that still hung from my neck and brought me right back to you.

We got lost for maybe more than an hour on the couch before heading to bed.

Funny how the cold doesn’t stand a chance when the person you love is near—not just warming your body… but healing your soul.

[freq13diary]

Look what you made me do… watching 💘📺The Summer I Turned Pretty, just because it smells a little like you. Maybe I’ll find a piece of you hidden in there somewhere. Or maybe I’m just hopeless. Again. Only you could pull that off.

[freq13diary]

🕯️ Saturday, June 21st – The Farewell

Background: Spirit of Fire · Jesse Gallagher

His words left me restless. I couldn’t hold back anymore.

—“Forgive me… but can you tell me what—or who—you really are?

Are you… an angel? A demon?”

The gentleman returned to his usual seat, looked me straight in the eyes, and calmly replied to my bold question:

—“Just a man, like anyone else.

But carrying a responsibility that doesn't belong to this world.

I wish I could tell you more…

but it's not polite to keep a lady waiting, my dear friend.”

Friend.

Not servant. Not worker.

Friend.

Something moved inside me.

But my heart was heavy. It felt like he was saying goodbye…

like someone who shines for a moment,

just before going out forever.

I wanted to ask: Are you going to die soon?

But I kept quiet.

—“We all die sooner or later,” he said, as if he knew what I was thinking.

“But don’t worry about me.

I’m not a good soul.

The ones who reach even a bit of purity get to leave early—they’re the lucky ones.

Innocent people always go first.

But people like me…

We’re judged with mathematical precision.

To those who are given much, much is required.

And we have to answer for every detail.

I was paid in advance.

I never asked for riches, or kingdoms, or wisdom.

Just the chance to love—

and through that, tear out the darkness inside me.

Because what good is it to win…

if the real victory is to love and be loved in return?”

—“So this really is goodbye, isn’t it, my dear gentleman?”

—“I’m afraid so.

But don’t get too sentimental.

I’m leaving you everything I built.

Do with it what you want—whatever you think is right.

Where I’m going… I don’t need anything.

Because there, I’ll find home.”

As he said those words, I got caught in one last illusion.

Everything seemed normal—until I noticed something:

a huge sword, piercing straight through his chest.

A double-edged weapon, solid and heavy, with a hilt the color of black gold.

The blade had something engraved on it, but I couldn’t read it.

Then I saw her—

a beautiful young woman, calm, confident, full of love in her eyes.

She walked up to him and tried to pull the sword out,

but she didn’t have the strength.

Wait…

Was that her? The lady in the portrait?

She couldn’t remove it…

So instead, she just laid her head on his chest—right where the blade had entered.

And she stayed.

She didn’t let go.

Then came a little girl.

She looked just like the woman—same eyes, same softness.

Without saying a word, she lifted her hand.

Made a small, gentle gesture toward the sword.

And the sword obeyed.

It slowly slid out of his chest, no force needed.

The girl never came close. She just… knew what to do.

Once the weapon hit the ground, it started to sink under its own weight.

And just before it disappeared,

the gentleman opened his right eye,

looked at the sword—

and I watched as black flames consumed it until nothing was left.

The couple walked away.

And the girl took her own path.

I didn’t understand the ending.

But I did understand this:

He let her shine.

And together… they let the girl shine too.

I didn’t see anything else.

But I felt peace.

Because in the end,

the gentleman stopped carrying that dark energy.

As if—finally—

he had found the peace every man longs for in this life…

but that only truly exists in eternity.

After seeing all that, I said nothing.

I just looked at him.

He looked back.

We nodded at the same time.

No more words were needed.

He was grateful for my service, and my company.

And for me…

it had been an honor to serve him.

Sure, I would've liked to see how things turned out between him and the lady.

But somehow… it didn’t bother me anymore.

I knew they'd look out for each other.

Tears filled my eyes—

but they were tears of joy.

All my life, I’d served powerful and wealthy people.

But this gentleman showed me something else:

A part of myself I always wanted to be.

Power held in silence.

And a kind of faith that never breaks—

the kind that waits… without giving up, all the way to the end.

Because deep down,

he believed—without a doubt—

that the dream he longed for

would arrive.

Eventually.

To find love?

Maybe I still have time to try.

So I gathered my things

and walked away from that place too.

A place I once thought was made for death…

But even in the darkest corners—

there's always a ray of light.

[freq13diary]

Saturday, June 21st

Suggested background music: Spirit of Fire · Jesse Gallagher

Among all kinds of stories and legends, there are some that feel like they came straight out of history… but also like they were pulled from the wild imagination of a few. And sometimes, the stories with the most fantasy and flair whisper truths we secretly wish were just that—fantasies, illusions, anything but real. Because when reality hits without being understood, it just becomes pain and suffering.

It was my last day working for that mysterious gentleman. I was getting everything ready for him, just like he asked. Gotta admit, during the time I worked for him, he never disrespected me or treated me as less. I saw him do things that made no sense. I saw him fall for someone and change direction completely… for a woman.

But that didn’t take away the fact that sometimes, just being around him gave me this chill. Something about him made me keep my distance. And he always seemed to notice. He’d apologize every time, saying:

—“I’m sorry if I disturbed your peace. Believe me, it’s not intentional… but I can’t help it.”

He always called me by my name. He didn’t even act like he owned the place.

I’d see him sitting for hours in the big hall of the castle. He only lived there for a short time. Honestly, I never figured out exactly where the place was. What struck me most was how calm he stayed, even when everything seemed to be falling apart around him. There he was—legs crossed, right elbow resting on the arm of the chair, finger pressed against his temple. Relaxed but solid. His stare said everything… and nothing.

I’ll never forget the night some guys broke in to loot the place. He just sat there. Standing up, he wasn’t tall—maybe 5’5”. But that night, with the moonlight pouring through the huge window, casting half of his body in silver… man, he looked like he was 6’5”. Everything about him messed with your head.

One of the guys, angry after finding nothing valuable, grabbed him by his freshly ironed shirt and tried to drag him up. I saw it all—frozen in place. But weirdly, they didn’t speak. They just stared at each other. One sitting calmly. The other standing on the far end of the big, nearly empty room.

He always liked being in the dark. Always asked me to turn off the lights. That night wasn’t any different. After a few seconds of that silent face-off, the guy just… turned around and left, taking his buddy with him.

I ran over, still shocked.

—“Excuse me, sir… what just happened? Why didn’t he hit you? I saw him grab you. What stopped him?”

He looked at me, super chill, and said:

—“What you just saw was an illusion. Some would call it a charm. Others, maybe hypnosis. But really—it’s just an illusion. Like most of what exists in this place. Rest easy. There’s nothing to worry about. You can go now.”

I got the message. He wanted to be alone. Sometimes I felt like solitude wasn’t just something he liked—it was something that claimed him.

A few days later, he approached me, voice calm but final.

—“I’ve enjoyed working with you. Truly. But now I have to leave, give everything up. So I’ll be letting you go. For good.”

That caught me off guard. Somewhere along the way, I’d grown fond of him. I hated seeing him so alone all the time, always thinking, like he was planning something against someone. He started to feel like family to me. I just wanted him to get out of that darkness he lived in—this strange bond he had with silence and sorrow. So I asked:

—“Forgive me if I’m out of line… but where are you going?”

Then, in the middle of a plain wall—no paintings, no ornaments—he showed me something. A doorway. But not a regular one. It looked like a vortex. It opened right in front of us. Honestly, I wasn’t shocked. I’d seen it plenty of times before. It had become part of the daily routine. But I never saw what was behind it.

—“Come with me,” he said. “I’ll show you.”

We stepped in. That vortex led to a massive hallway that opened up to this palace-looking place, straight out of royalty. We walked into the main hall, and right there, front and center, was a painting. Gorgeous. A woman, seated. Sky-blue dress, soft waves in her hair, pink lips, and this gaze that could melt the strongest of men.

—“Who’s the lady?” I asked.

—“She’s the lady of the house,” he said. “And if you look closer… you’ll see more.”

I squinted. Right beside her, in the same painting… was him. The man I’d served all this time. But something was off—his figure was blurred, like the portrait itself didn’t want to reveal him fully. I wanted to ask more questions, but suddenly, we were back in the old castle. Just like that.

I tried again:

—“Sorry… I don’t know her. When did you meet her?”

—“That’s why I’m leaving,” he said quietly. “I’ve decided to go be with her.”

—“Wait… what do you mean?”

But I stopped myself.

I’d already understood. Completely. I stayed quiet. And then he said:

—“I’m giving everything back. Truth is, I hated being here. I’m done waiting. If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. And fast. So get ready—soon, we’ll both go our separate ways.”

Days went by, and his departure was getting closer. That gentleman stopped dressing in his usual dark and elegant clothes.

If someone asked me, I’d say he had an aura like that Dracula guy everyone knows…

But there was one big difference:

he had this strange warmth—quiet, but real.

He was the kind of person you'd need a whole lifetime to really get to know.

I never saw him lose control, not even in moments where it looked like he was backed into a corner.

People whispered things about him.

Some said he wasn’t alive.

Others thought he was faking who he was.

Some just hated him—wanted him gone.

But there was always something that held them back.

I’d catch myself watching him sometimes, just… admiring the way he moved.

Everything he did was calm, deliberate, effortless.

There was this one time a little girl walked up to him.

He had that distant look, the kind that says “don’t come close”…

But with kids—especially girls—he connected like magic.

Like only the pure ones really got him.

At first, she stared from a distance.

Then she just walked up, no hesitation.

She looked him in the eyes and smiled.

And for once… he smiled back.

A real one.

It was like watching something sacred.

I used to wonder what was going on inside him.

But somehow… he always knew when I was watching.

—"Don’t let my silence worry you," he told me once.

"I’m just observing. Trying to make sense of things.

I see, I hear, but I’m only allowed to grasp a few pieces…

Just what my human side can handle.

I’m looking for a way out—one that doesn’t lead us straight into war.

But some people… they just don’t get it."

I wanted to tell him how sad that sounded.

But I held back.

Maybe that's why people who live in ignorance seem so much happier.

Then again, I’m starting to believe we all get exactly what we deserve.

—“Excuse me, sir… should I prepare something for dinner?”

That was my daily question.

Routine, sure—but not pointless.

Some days, he barely ate once.

Maybe he was trying to master himself.

One day, I got bold. I told him:

—“I think I understand you a bit more now.

I once heard that whoever masters themselves can master the world.”

He looked at me and shook his head.

—“That’s not possible. The world can’t be mastered—it’s already broken.

Many have tried. And the closer you get to doing it… the more it crushes you.

No, I don’t want the world.

I’m just a part of it. Though… not entirely.”

Those words hit something in me.

Maybe I had judged him too quickly.

And still, the question burned inside me:

Who are you really?

Then came the day. His goodbye.

The last time I’d ever see him.

The news that morning had me on edge.

The promised land was in conflict.

And the land that once gave him a chance… now stood beside him.

I went to the study one last time.

That place where he always sat, quiet, thinking.

Same posture, same silence, like time didn’t touch him.

—“Excuse me, sir… did you hear the news today?”

—“I’m aware,” he said.

“I’m not indifferent. I’m just trying to understand.”

He smiled—sarcastic, half-tired.

—“They’re doing it… but they’re not united. That’ll cost them.

Luckily, I’m not directly involved right now.

But I still need to prepare the ground,

to bring some kind of balance to this whole mess.

Still, my part’s small.

Remember that portrait I showed you?”

—“Yes. Of course. That woman… she’s unforgettable.”

—“She’s my wife,” he said.

“And maybe you wondered why I looked almost invisible in that painting.

It’s because, in the end… I’m meant to disappear.”

—“Disappear?”

—“I might make some noise for a while,

but I have to fade out like I was never really here.

Just a blurry memory for a few.

It’s the only way she can take the spotlight.

She’s the one who should speak. Not me.

I’m tired of the power games and the bloodshed.

Where’s the honor?

Where are the kings who used to ride with their armies?

Now they hide behind brave hearts who die like pawns.

Those aren’t kings.

But there are still a few out there…

forging themselves for the real fight.

And when they rise—

there won’t be innocent deaths anymore.

Because they’ll put their lives on the line themselves.

And just for a moment…

honor will come back.

Power doesn’t show off.

It hides.

And only the ones who truly see it…

can tell the difference between being and pretending.”

—“Forgive me, sir…

but are you a king?”

He smiled gently.

—“Not at all.

I’m just a servant. Same as you.

A king needs his queen.

And I…

I’m finally going to find mine.”

[freq13diary]

I went back to the past to find something that could tell me more about myself—

right to that time when everything seemed clear,

and a brand new beginning started to take shape in my life.

Maybe when I was 15 or 16…

you think you can make it, if you just hold on tight.

And for once, I was actually right.

I found myself back in high school,

then walking a long road along Route 51,

to a little stop where they sell food and gas.

I was looking for something to keep me going…

And then I saw you.

You showed up wearing a greenish flannel shirt,

looking exactly like yourself from way back when.

Your face, your hands—

everything about you was saying,

“Can’t you see me? I’m right here.”

It was that expression—so you—that I already knew so well.

I couldn’t help but smile, and I walked toward you.

And there we were,

right where everything started—

two teenagers with dreams, ambition,

but the same kind of feeling.

Because when you travel back in time

to remember who you used to be,

sometimes you find that spark that started it all.

The dreams, the trips, the songs—

they were all stored in the vault of memory,

left behind, covered in dust.

But we came back just to open that old, heavy chest

and remind ourselves we still have that fire burning inside.

Then we came back to the present,

and it’s like you greeted me wearing your elegant armor—

distant, guarded, a little cold.

But that duality of yours… it reminded me of your wild side,

the one that hides your real self underneath.

You walked away like you were leaving,

but your silence…

it was actually pulling me in.

So I reached for your hand.

You let me.

Like we were dancing to a song only we could hear.

And just like that, I took off your armor—

but only because you let me.

I held you.

And the masks just… fell away.

We were just a couple of teenagers again.

You let me see your chaos, your quirks, your light.

And I loved every bit of it.

It wasn’t just about love—

it was something deeper.

Recognition. Trust.

Something mutual.

Then you stood up, smiled, and grabbed my hand.

This time, you were leading.

And I followed.

Eyes wide open, running with the same excitement as you.

I didn’t care where we were going.

The destination stopped mattering.

We were just feeling,

living—

the moment, the process, the connection.

I didn’t want you to stop talking.

You made me feel so much better.

What if we made up for lost time?

We’re in our best moment right now.

Should we be scared of this feeling?

You got up again, laughing—

and your laughter pulled me in.

You ran, still holding my hand.

This time, it wasn’t an escape.

The train of missed chances had already left.

But then,

an old man walked up to us and tossed the keys to his old Chevy.

I caught them.

But I handed them to you.

Because I know you’ll take me on the adventure.

And wherever we go—if it’s with you—

it turns into a gift,

and a surprise,

every single time.

We fired up the engine and hit the road.

It felt like we were driving through a time tunnel.

There was noise outside.

Too much of it.

Fake friends will ask:

“Why does she get everything?”

“Why always her?”

But…

Since when did we care about outside noise?

Maybe when you get back to the basics,

you don’t have time to get distracted from what really matters.

Suddenly, everyone sees you.

Because you’ve finally accepted yourself—

just as you are.

Your real light shines through.

And me?

I’m just here,

happy to ride along with you.

Then, on the old radio, a voice says:

“Welcome home.”

We look at each other—

and for the first time in years,

a genuine smile shows up again.

[freq13diary]

While the feline was taken somewhere else, they gave him a few minutes of freedom—just to go wherever he wanted. His nose picked up the scent of someone pretending to be the first of the nine… but he was just a fake.

So the cat, calm and unbothered, walked toward him. They locked eyes, but the man froze.

The feline didn’t attack—he just wanted to see who stood in front of him.

He wasn’t looking for impostors. He was looking for the real ones.

But that guy… sparked nothing in him.

Having power isn’t about how you look. And once the predator saw it was just another loud fool being used, he lost all interest.

He scanned the whole area and got ready to attack—

But something deep inside him stopped him.

He collapsed. And they dragged him back to his cage.

When they returned him, they noticed something was missing.

One claw from his right paw was gone.

Right before he blacked out, he sent it to her.

Just like he did with the horn, he didn’t say much—he just sliced open a portal straight to her.

Maybe it was his way of saying:

“I know what they’re trying.

And I know you’ll rise again—like you always do.

But take this claw. Use it to cut whatever needs cutting.

It takes strength to carry this, but you’ve got fire inside you.

I can’t do more. I only come to rest beside you at night.

But each passing day, my fire fades… and I lose my edge.

In the end, I’ll just be ordinary.

So I trust you’ll break free on your own.”

Suddenly, she saw the claw on the ground.

She picked it up. It was heavy.

Then, out of nowhere, a mysterious figure showed up—

Sitting in the shadows, tucked in the far corner of her big house.

His presence pulled at her.

There was a strange confidence about him—calm but intense, kind of arrogant in a magnetic way.

He spoke:

"Come here. Bring that with you."

She walked toward him, curious, a little thrown off, but also drawn to him—like they’d already met somewhere before.

Then the shadow opened his eyes—two different-colored pupils.

But his presence kept her steady. No fear. Only calm.

He reached for her right hand, gently took the claw, and unfolded her index finger—she didn’t resist.

With one smooth motion, he fused the claw into her finger, like it belonged there all along.

Then he looked at her and said:

“No one messes with us like that.

Now go rewrite the script.

Show them who you really are.

I trust you. I’m fading…

But don’t forget: you control the last one.

So act like the queen you are.

Do it for yourself—

And by doing that, you’ll do it for all of us.”

After that… the shadow twisted and vanished—

Gone without a trace.

A girl suddenly appeared behind her and whispered:

“You saw him, didn’t you?”

That was his real form.

Even if it was just a shadow, he’s not harmless.

What you saw… that was his final breath.

And he told you more than he was supposed to.

Now you know.

But be wise with it.

Remember:

His nature is… consuming.

The good news? His hunger’s been shut down.

But that doesn’t mean he’s not still what he is.

Everything he said was true.

You’re no longer a princess.

But his noble side will always see you as one.

And his dark side already named you his queen.

He asked you to act like it—

But not from ego.

Remember: your biggest weakness is your greatest strength.

Don’t let your light turn to shadow like his did.

“Why do you think he asked you to take the lead?”

Because he knows damn well his way only leads to ruin.

Yours is smarter.

So don’t stain it with hate or pride.

Or you’ll both go down.

Your rebellion isn’t like his.

You do it because of what they did to you.

He does it for fun.

But he’s been tamed now.

You’ll see him—soft, kind, loving.

But don’t get fooled by his vibe.

His actions may feel like gifts…

But don’t lose yourself in them.

You’re not here to stay on guard all the time,

or to fix him.

Just guide him.

Love him.

Keep him in check.

He’s not your burden—he’s just your companion.

He’ll fill the gaps you carry.

And you’ll do the same for him.

So don’t worry.

Don’t overthink it.

Maybe your past made you doubt…

But with him?

Just be yourself.

Love.

Feel.

Don’t be scared.

That’s the only way you’ll bring out his best side.

And maybe—

when he reaches the ninth—

he’ll ask himself:

“Is it the hidden gods… or is it you?”

It’ll be a deadly choice.

And maybe he’ll die to himself.

But only to escape with you.

And if you both get lost…

she will come.

She’ll remind you both why you were bonded in the first place.

So go.

No fear.

No stress.

This is just the beginning.

Now it’s just two people

who looked for each other

and finally met.

Enjoy the journey. Together.

And just like that—

time realigned.

And everything returned to its usual rhythm.

Life went on…

like it always does.

[freq13diary]

I never wanted a comfortable life, or a safe space.

You chose pain over company.

And honestly… that was beautiful.

Because only someone who chooses fire

can look straight into it without blinking.

I don’t want you dimmed —

I want you burning, your way, at your own pace.

So... how do we rewrite the script?

I’ll let you write it.

[freq13diary]

woke up with her by my side, but for some reason I can’t explain, I started feeling hungry. On top of that, I was getting restless and wanted to go out. Suddenly, something hit my sense of smell, so I just got up and realized I was moving on all fours, with huge claws.

I figured reading whatever was inside that horn would come with consequences, so I didn’t pay much attention to it. I kept moving, and suddenly something caught the attention of my strange, restless eyes. It was a huge reflection that blinded me. But its presence didn’t just freeze me in place — it made me drop to the ground without even thinking.

Then I saw a little girl, dressed all in white. For some reason, I felt safe next to her. She had her back to me, and when she turned and looked at me with that innocent, sweet gaze, my eyes locked onto hers. I gotta admit — I tried to hypnotize her, but this time, it didn’t work. She took control of my will, somehow.

I didn’t feel scared, but something deep inside told me I was standing in front of someone who deserved all my respect and attention. We held each other's gaze — deep and intense — and in that moment, I saw it. That pure innocence and beauty couldn’t compare to anything I’d ever seen in this world.

Her eyes said everything without saying a word. And when she smiled at me, I fell into this kind of trance I couldn’t break out of — not even with the help of my new, strange eye powers. I realized I had faded into the background. I wasn’t the main character anymore.

---

Then she showed up out of nowhere and saw the little girl too. But what she saw was this:

A beautiful little girl, maybe around five years old, turned my huge tiger into a helpless little cub. She picked him up, held him in her tiny arms, and walked away with him.

I said,

“Hey, wait! He’s mine! Tell me, sweetie, why do you wanna take my tiger?”

The girl turned around, and I was speechless.

I’d never seen a creature like her. She looked like something out of heaven — but her eyes, man… they had this fire in them I just can’t explain.

She smiled at me… and without saying a word, I just *knew* what she meant:

“I have to take this cub. He’s grown too much, and it’s dangerous for you to keep him around. I’ll feed him and take him for walks. He’s not the kind of thing you can keep as a pet. He won’t hurt you, but he’s a threat to everyone around you. Just look at him — he’s restless and hungry. But not for food. He wants to find the other nine and devour them.”

—“Why would he do something like that?”

“Because that’s his nature. When he stole the horn, he didn’t realize he was the tenth one. So the beast reprogrammed him to feed on the other nine. And once the time came, he’d destroy the artifact and take it all without a fight. But the tenth one rebelled. He disobeyed. And because of that, neither of them can exist together… but they also can’t destroy each other. Still, both belong to me.”

—“Wait… then why don’t you just release him and stop the beast once and for all?”

“Because from the start, you all chose to do things your way. And I respected that. I never abandoned you — that’s why you have each other. And that’s why I’ll help you, so he can return to his original form and lose that hunger to find the nine.

When he’s back to normal, he’ll stop attacking. But that doesn’t mean his true nature will disappear. That’s why it’s important — when you get him back, don’t ever let him fully take over your life. He’ll handle your problems, and with good intentions… but if you give him too much power too easily, his nature will come back automatically. That hunger will grow again… until it reaches the same climax it’s at now. Then he’ll start doing things just for fun… and turn into a virus.

He’ll spread, hide, and his enemies will think he’s dead. But once he finds the nine, he’ll start hunting them one by one. In the end, he’ll just want the final war against the beast.

The beast will try to destroy him, but the experiment will know too much by then. He’ll attack the beast’s weak spot — but he won’t win. Still, his actions will seal his fate. Then the beast will have the right to claim him and take him away.”

—“But if that happens… will you come back to calm him down?”

“No. That’s what you’re for.

I gave you eyes that can’t be hypnotized or fooled by his right eye. The left one’s just for defense, but it’s got unpredictable traits. Still, he’ll always listen to you.”

—“And if he loses control and doesn’t recognize me?”

“Don’t worry. You already have what you need inside. What you see as your weakness is actually your greatest strength. Use it. And don’t fall for his tricks — they’ll come disguised as success after success. His nature feeds off the seven deadly sins — especially three of them.

That’s why you now have everything around you, and he has nothing. But he’s rising. Don’t doubt. Take from him what you always wanted. But take care of him, because he’s yours. He’s not evil… just marked. And he’ll show you his own cure.

His stubbornness will always pull him back to his nature without even realizing it. From now on, only *you* can handle him. I’ll give him back to you at night, but during the day I’ll keep him busy — until he returns to his true form.”

—“And what if I don’t want to take on that responsibility?”

“You’re totally free not to accept it.”

—“But what’ll happen to him?”

“Don’t worry. He’ll sleep. He’ll be sealed away… until someone else takes his place — and someone takes yours.”

—“And if I accept? What happens to both of us?”

The girl didn’t say anything else. She just gave me a smile that eased all the pain in my soul.

She turned around. He became the fierce tiger again — but he looked like he was under her control. The little girl walked beside him with this calm and patience that gave me peace like I hadn’t felt in a long time.

Caught up in the euphoria and joy of that peaceful moment, I just wanted to follow them.

But some invisible barrier stopped me. My desire to be with them wouldn’t let me rest. I kept fighting with myself.

Then a young woman walked up and gently placed her warm hand on my shoulder.

“Don’t worry. You can’t go with them yet… you haven’t activated your seal.”

I, impatient, asked her,

“Then tell me — what do I have to do to get the mark?”

“Be patient. Just don’t doubt yourself. Keep your word. Do what you’re meant to do. Let go of the rock of hate, forgive, and move on. Don’t give your power away to the people who marked you with something that can be erased. You need to be whole.

And when he comes for you, he’ll take you to the Lion so he can protect you both. Your soul needs to be like a new room — ready to be filled with what’s eternal and unerasable.

Don’t worry. They’ll stop bothering you soon, they’ll be busy with their same old stuff. Just don’t do what he did. One of you has to be the source of wisdom.

When you’re in doubt, ask your heart. Don’t let others take you away from what your soul knows for sure.”

—Then I asked, a bit desperate:

“If his eyes aren’t normal… then what’s so special about mine?”

With a smile, she replied:

“When you’re whole — not divided — when you’re truly yourself, and you show your sensitive side with no filter… then you’ll counter his right eye. That eye lies, creates illusions, confuses, numbs, and sees what’s hidden behind selfish interests.

You can live like normal people. But don’t let ego drag you down the path you both know you should avoid.”

I stood there, thinking. And when I looked for her again… the young woman had vanished.

[freq13diary]

So I sneak out to the garden to see you

We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew

So close your eyes

Escape this town for a little while, oh oh