func-maid
func-maid
func_maid
2K posts
call me maidfemme succubus lesbianmakes a lot of weird shit, occasionally posts it
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
func-maid · 7 hours ago
Text
meshiii🍴
Tumblr media
4K notes · View notes
func-maid · 2 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
16K notes · View notes
func-maid · 2 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
28K notes · View notes
func-maid · 2 days ago
Note
king do you have any good transmasc music recs? like music made by transmascs who arent singing about bugs or other virgin shit
no its all bad im sorry
16K notes · View notes
func-maid · 2 days ago
Text
obligary keyforge addition:)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
This is the most real MTG post of all time cause I'll give you one guess which of these two cards was an absolute menace in standard and had to be banned and which one hasn't seen any play since getting reprinted
Tumblr media Tumblr media
23K notes · View notes
func-maid · 3 days ago
Text
“[kink] is bad because [thing the kink is based on] is bad” is such a funny take. we’re acting. you hate theater. you’re standing up in the audience and mansplaining to lady macbeth that killing people is wrong
17K notes · View notes
func-maid · 5 days ago
Text
Me: my god.. i did it.. i killed him..!
Angel on my shoulder: we're extremely fortunate. You shot him in the side of the head and you're wearing gloves. Place the gun in his hand and set the house ablaze. Officer Goger's tragic suicide will be the perfect cover story
Devil on my shoulder: Goger was always eating stuffing and spelt wheat and steel cut oats. Bet he'd taste reeeeal good on a spit with an apple in his mouth. Come on, i've seen the way you've looked at him..
My tulpa, a 6'9" DD smokeshow hottie PS1 graphics anthro leopard girl in a lab coat: you must put a baby in me Your Highness, quickly!
119K notes · View notes
func-maid · 9 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
25K notes · View notes
func-maid · 10 days ago
Text
OW OW OW AAWROOOOOOO!
this video goes out to all the people that want me to make a YouTube channel- all the missing footage is for you!
[PHOTO POST HERE!]
545 notes · View notes
func-maid · 11 days ago
Text
does michelangelo's david stop being art if you write cumslut on his stomach?
518 notes · View notes
func-maid · 11 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
39K notes · View notes
func-maid · 11 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
Goth Night :)
241 notes · View notes
func-maid · 12 days ago
Text
Hi my name is Ozy'mandias, King of Kings and I have two vast and trunkless legs of stone and a frown and wrinkled lip and a lot of people tell me I look like the Younger Memnon (a/n if you don't know who he is get da hell out of here!). I'm a statue but my visage is shattered and lies half sunk on the sand. I’m also a colossal wreck, and I stand in the desert of an antique land where I’ve been for a really long time (I’m ancient). I’m a lifeless thing (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly the passions the sculptor read and stamped on me, which yet survive. I love sculptors and I get all my expressions from there. For example today I was wearing a sneer of cold command and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was standing in the desert. The lone and level sands were boundless and bare, which I was very happy about. A lot of mighty looked upon my works and despaired. I put my middle finger up at them.
6K notes · View notes
func-maid · 13 days ago
Text
32K notes · View notes
func-maid · 15 days ago
Text
Actually cannot stop watching this
123K notes · View notes
func-maid · 15 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
"nothing left but the memories of the memories of when i had my best friend" jennifer's body (2009) x ivan the terrible by ilya repin
557 notes · View notes
func-maid · 15 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
100K notes · View notes