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fake idgafer. i saw tht haunted look in ur eyes

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New Years resolutions: do whatever i want forever

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chatgpt is the coward's way out. if you have a paper due in 40 minutes you should be chugging six energy drinks, blasting frantic circus music so loud you shatter an eardrum, and typing the most dogshit essay mankind has ever seen with your own carpel tunnel laden hands

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joints will see you taking a step & be like "i bet i could improve on this with my Cool New Trick." & theyre wrong

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new inadvisable tactic for physio exercises; drink enough you cant feel the knee youre working out, works like a dream with no downsides at all promise

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the sexual tension between me and a tattoo i don’t have money for right now

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“By the world I was taken By storm I was tossed But I told myself that love’s never lost.”

- Love’s Never Lost from A Man of No Importance 

I was feeling a bit nostalgic about campaign 2, so I thought I’d draw a little something

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imagine. you are an deeply ambitious young woman in the rural Empire. you get a lucky break to go to the Soltryce Academy where you are hand-picked by one of the professors who proceeds to both favor and torture you and two others, with whom you become romantically entwined; he always does seem to favor one of the others over you. On the night of your final exam, when you poison your parents, that other student has a mental break, badly injuring you and you get him to the Vergesson Sanatorium. You continue on as a wizard assassin for years until one day, in your late 20s, he escapes. You hear nothing of him until he resurfaces when you receive a letter. He comes to see you. You talk. Not long after he and his friends are invited to dinner by your mentor and your mentor proceeds to offer the seat you thought was yours directly to him in front of you. He and his friends openly insult the mentor who has held you for years. You and your ex joke about racing each other to the top. You are then called upon to spy on them as they traverse Eiselcross for another Assembly wizard; they return to Rexxentrum and ask you to help them break into the asylum where your ex was once kept. You have a brief mental breakdown in an alleyway but you give them what they need. It does not go well and you are asked to chase them down but when you have them you find yourself letting them go. A few days pass and you track them down once more to a small temple. Your mentor is defeated and you are asked, after all this time, not to kill him. You leave in rage with your partner only to return when you realize you can have some small closure in testifying against him. You do so. Your mentor's seat is offered to your ex. He turns it down. It goes to you.

Seven years later the Assembly breaks from the empire during an era of mass unrest. You go and hide in a smut shop in Zadash. A group of fucking weirdos come in. One of them uses your ex's childhood name. They use every way they can trap you possible. When they finally succeed you realize they're being led by your ex's current boyfriend. You are pinned against the wall in a smut shop in Zadash. Every day Astrid Becke wakes up.

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heard someone was back in town

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[ID: A digital drawing of Essek Thelyss from Critical Role. He is facing three quarters to the right with a neutral expression. He has shoulder length hair. End description.]

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

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I know "60s housewives who invented slash fanfiction" has taken on a life of its own as a phrase, but Kirk/Spock didn't really exist until the 70s and THOSE WOMEN HAD JOBS. They were teachers and librarians and bookkeepers and scientists and they damn well spent their own money going to conventions, printing zines, buying fanart and making fandom happen. Put some respect on their names.

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Thank god they brought back An Amount Of Daylight That Makes You Want To Live. It was getting a bit scary for a minute there.

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wish i could call in bitchy to work

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In 1988, ACT UP protested the FDA withholding HIV treatment due to requiring unethical double-blind studies of medication they already knew worked.

In 2024, trans activists protested promoters of an NHS-funded report requiring unethical double-blind studies of medication they already knew worked.

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oh shit was that today

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MEAN GIRLS 2004 — dir. Mark Waters

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For those that aren't in Australia right now, we have the funniest scandal going on.

Firstly let us introduce you to the eye of the storm: Sam Kerr. Sam is a women's soccer player who has in the last year become one of the most famous and beloved athletes in Australia. Captain of the women's national team, Sam became something of a cult figure after the last Women's Soccer World Cup became a complete unpredicted sensation in Australia, with the whole country getting behind the team.

Sam, up until now, has had probably one of the most squeaky clean images in sport. Generally in Australia it is not uncommon for our sports stars to be caught up in scandals involving drugs:

violence:

drinking their own urine:

or if you're cricket legend Shane Warne, probably all three at once.

Contrasting all this, Sam's image as the squeaky clean saviour for sport made it all the more shocking this last week, when it was announced that Kerr was to face trial after having been charged by the UK police of a "racially aggravated offence" involving a taxi driver.

This was shocking news. Nobody knew what to make of it. Sam was a model for young girls everywhere and a national treasure. "This is why we can't have nice things" screamed the nation. It seemed like all hope was lost.

That is, until, yesterday, when the UK police finally revealed the full details of the case, in which Sam Kerr, sporting legend, was arrested for vomiting in a cab, and then telling an intervening police officer that he was a “stupid white bastard”.

Now we probably don't need to point out that in Australia, vomiting in a taxi and then calling a cop a bastard is about as close to a national culture as we have.

You could not have come up with a better headline to make someone a national hero.

Needless to say, Sam in now being hailed down under as the greatest legend that ever lived, and a petition has already been started to have her picture added to the $5 note.

The tide has swung so far that not one, but TWO, state Premiers have spoken out in support of Kerr, and the Prime Minister has even gone on the record describing her as "a delight".

And so ends the racial abuse saga of our greatest sports hero of all time, and the very first reverse milkshake duck to ever exist.