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This doesn’t work for everyone, depending on how your doubts and thoughts manifest but I thought I’d share it for those it may help.

When I’m doubting my friends love me or I think they’re just pretending to be my friend, or maybe even laughing about me behind my back or things like that, there’s a thought process that helps me.

I remind myself that by thinking these things, I am thinking that my friends are the sort of people who would do these sort of things. And I realize that that's not how I view them. I have a lot of respect for my friends and I see them as kind. And them doing bad things like my brain tries to trick me into believing contradicts my thoughts about them as people.

So, when I'm struggling with these thoughts, I try thinking that "my friends are kind people and they wouldn't do something mean like pretend to be my friend."

I still get the thoughts a lot, but I find it easier to soothe them now.

(Here's a longer post I wrote on self soothing and needing reassurance in general that I think might be helpful!)

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J: If the owner comes forward, I’ll send them your way. P: They can fight me for it.

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thinking once again about how the lesters met dan when he was kind of a mess, and so so young, and they welcomed him into their family and were rewarded by getting to see not only their son grow into an incredible, happy, successful young man but at the same time that man's boyfriend turned life partner grow from the confused, scared, sad and sometimes angry kid to a warm, happy, successful young man. they got to see phil realize he was going to have dan forever and so were they.

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They should invent a method of asking for reassurance that nobody secretly hates you that doesn't make people secretly hate you.

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I’ve been saving this since I was ten years old… for Buffalo Bill… but you’ll have to do.

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The three stages of shipping.

Stage 1: NOW KISS

Stage 2: NOW FUCK

Stage 3: NOW BREAK EACH OTHER’S HEARTS AND THEN MEND THEM SLOWLY WHILE TOUCHING EACH OTHER WITH REVERENT, TREMBLING HANDS

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(Hi, been a while)

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Miss Fisher Snippets (248)

In S1E5 Raisins and Almonds, the painting for which Phryne won the bid at the auction was painted by an Australian artist named Margaret Preston (1875 – 1963). According to a fellow Miss Fisher fan’s research, the piece was her work from 1925, called Still Life.

If you recall, in this episode, Bert was angry at Cec and his fiancée Alice for contemplating a move to the countryside and becoming a farmer, so he asked a man named Joe McPherson to make an offer to buy Cec’s share of their cab business. It turns out that McPherson was actually her birth name (Margaret Rose McPherson); Preston was her married name. I like the little Easter egg for the audience.

Margaret Preston showed a very early interest in art and went to study at the National Gallery of Victoria Art School for five years in her teens. Her art didn’t gain prominence until 1920s (coinciding with what Phryne said about her being a talent to watch), famous for her bold and colorful paintings and woodblock prints. The National Gallery of Australia described them as “energetically decorative”. In an article titled “Celebrating 150 years of Margaret Preston: A bold legacy that still inspires” (April 14, 2025 on copyright.com.au), she was called “a trailblazer in modernist painting, a committed advocate for Aboriginal art and Australian identity, and a fearless innovator in style and form”. Trailblazer. Advocate. Fearless. The same words we often used to describe Phryne. No wonder she was drawn to Preston’s painting. They were kindred spirits.

(Posted 21-Jun-2025)

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a character who isn't used to being cared for or treated kindly being gently and tenderly cared for for the first time in years or maybe ever. save me

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(opening the author’s works page after finishing a fic) and if im lucky they’ll have written this exact same fic but different a bunch more times

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Whatcha reading? 👁️👁️📖

Little doodle inspired by a picture of my reading buddy Soba! 🖤

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feeling so normal about this

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Hellen, how do you know how to do so many things? I know how to do a few things but I look at your stuff and every time I'm like "damn. I wish I could do that"

oh, I just do them.

It's after 1:30 am, so you get the existential answer. The fun thing about personhood is you get to just be whatever. You can't necessarily do whatever--money and laws are things, unfortunately, and you only get so much control over the opportunities available to you. But you can sort of just throw yourself down on the anvil of life and hammer yourself into whatever shape you want. Ideally the process of it drives out some flaws as you go, but sometimes also you take an impurity and make yourself stronger with it.

I am, still, a person who is terrified of failure; of incorrectness; of being wrong. And there is nothing to do with fear except shatter it with blunt force, and so I line myself up against failure again and again and again. I will try. I must; or the fear of failure wins, and I must keep trying after I fail or I have failed utterly. I fear failure, and therefore I take it as a challenge. I must do what I think I cannot. And you know what? More often than not, I can.

I have a weird and wandering skillset because I make myself try things, knowing full well that I will remember for decades every time someone saw me be less than instantly successful, because the only way I know to get better is to batter down the dross of my own fear. That's the deal. I'm not doing anything that nobody has done before. I know it's all possible. I just have to be the sort of person that does it. And it gets easier every time. If the question is can it be done and the answer is yes, then the next question is can I be the one to do it, and the answer is I want to be.

Every time I fail my way over and over to eventual success, trying again the next time is less scary; every time I have a broader base of skills to carry to the next challenge. I'm not unusually talented, just stubborn as hell, and I've lived long enough on I have to do what scares me that honestly, not that much scares me anymore.

If you keep failing long enough, it turns out that you just get really good at problem solving, and figuring out unconventional ways to reach your goals. It's not about a special secret concoction of skills, it's about persistence, and hammering away until you've taken a mess and made it into something you think is worth keeping. It's not easy, but it is simple.

Also I have incredibly strong unmedicated ADHD. But I sort of assume that's glaringly obvious.