glxrious-purpose

[glxrious-purpose]

LOKI LAUFEYSON

“Trust my rage.”

Made for @glxrious-purpose for the Begin Again Holiday Exchange!

[glxrious-purpose]

vengeancedemons​:

“Nice to be believed in.” This whole thing was fucking stupid. Robbie wanted nothing more than to tell the damn cat to fuck off, but he knew that wouldn’t get him very far. Knowing his luck, trying to shake the thing would end with it following him home, and then Daisy would probably want to keep it. That was the last thing Robbie wanted right now. “Thanks. Sure wasn’t easy, but I’m relentless.”

Christ, he was tired of shit like this. God complexes like this one always brought Robbie right back to Eli, to the way he’d gone on and on about respect and how the power he’d stolen made him deserving of it, meant he was owed it. Robbie had never given much of a shit one way or another. After all, gods were hardly impressive to a man with the Devil riding shotgun. “People got smarter,” he snorted, rolling his eyes. “Stopped being impressed by every asshole with power. Shit like that’s a dime a dozen nowadays.” There were plenty of people running around who qualified as gods. Few of them, Robbie suspected, were as annoying as this one. “You know what? You’re right. I’ve never met anybody as goddamn irritating as you are. Congratulations, you’re uniquely punchable.”

//

The thought of being believed in made Loki give a scoff. If only mortals would believe in him. "If only mortals would return the same courtesy." Even turning into a cat did not seem to impress. But then, since he had encountered this man before, he should have known better. Despite the sarcasm, he had a feeling the mortal was relentless, if only in the case of continuing to be ignorant. All of them seemed to be relentless in that area. "Clearly. I was concerned there for a moment, but how fortunate that you have persevered."

Smarter. That was a matter for debate. Yes they had made advances in technology, but that only made them more cocky, and less likely to believe what was right in front of their face. Seeing something was not good enough. Now they wanted an explanation. "Sadly, there are too many powered individuals, yes. But being powered and having power are two quite different things." Just because someone like Stark could fly around in a tin can did not make him a god. The thought of this mortal or any other punching him was rather amusing. The man could certainly try, but it would not end well for him. "Oh, well I'm so pleased to have made myself stand out in some small way," Loki drawled, "Though I cannot speak for your chances if you do actually attempt to punch me."

[glxrious-purpose]

daisyquakes​:

[ text ]: What a complete ball of Human-shaped trash. 

@glxrious-purpose

(✉️ ➡️ asgardian lofi ): HUMAN SHAPED TRASH  (✉️ ➡️ asgardian lofi ): i actually really like that one (✉️ ➡️ asgardian lofi ): but i think you’ll find that’s more recycling than trash (✉️ ➡️ asgardian lofi ): trust me, people get a /lot/ worse, which doesn’t speak a lot to the human race ig (✉️ ➡️ asgardian lofi ): do i get bonus points for alien dna at least?

[Miss Johnson] Is the repetition in all capitals because you are pleased or displeased? I can never keep mortal jargon clear. [Miss Johnson] Why thank you. I thought it was rather witty. [Miss Johnson] Though it becomes less witty if you attempt to analyze it. [Miss Johnson] No, it certainly does not. Clearly I am not the only one who sees that humans are disappointing. [Miss Johnson] If you did get any "bonus points," your human side still cancels them out.

[glxrious-purpose]

catalystsofchange​:

(✉️ ➡️ feed me): you’re welcome :) (✉️ ➡️ feed me): ah, see, it’s hard to impress me with magic. i dated pretty much the best magician /ever/ so everybody else kind of pales in comparison (✉️ ➡️ feed me): to everybody. come on, it’s a matter of opinion, man. and i wouldn’t hold your breath there. us ‘mortals’ aren’t particularly known for rolling over for anybody, even if they /do/ think they’re superior. maybe /especially/ when they think they’re superior. (✉️ ➡️ feed me): okay. and what exactly have /you/ accomplished? because you’re not really doing a good job convincing me that you’re superior, and i’ve got a feeling you’ve fallen short there with pretty much anyone else you’ve tried to convince lately, too. clearly you’re not ruling the world. and if you were ruling any /other/ world, i’m guessing you’d be there now. so, the way i see it, your accomplishments here are pretty much just… you talking yourself up to strangers? gotta say, it’s not as impressive as you seem to think it is.

[Unknown] The colon and right parenthesis is supposed to be telling me something, is it not? [Unknown] The "best magician ever"? Really. And is this person a mortal? If so, then I soundly reject that claim. [Unknown] Well, considering I have little regard for mortals' opinions, I doubt I will listen to any disagreement anyway. And yes, I have become unfortunately aware of that. Which only proves how foolish you all are. [Unknown] A good deal more than you have. But considering I have accomplished quite a bit in a thousand years, I fear it would take far too long for me to list everything. And if I have fallen short in any of my endeavors, it is only because they have involved mortals. You have no idea where and how I might be ruling, so you would do well not to make assumptions. But sadly that is much of what I have been forced to do on Midgard, which would not be necessary if you mortals would simply listen for a change.

[glxrious-purpose]

immortalweapon​:

(✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): The guy who owns the website, I guess? I don’t know his name (✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): Well, people believing I’m human isn’t really a problem. It’s a little harder for them to believe someone is a god (✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): I get that, trust me. But this isn’t Asgard. And it’s not going to be Asgard. It’s a different place, with different rules. And the rules aren’t going to change for you, so sometimes you have to change for them (✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): It is what it is. There’s not really anything to be done about it

[Mister Rand] And will he be able to accomplish what the "social media guru" cannot? I still think mortal technology is lacking no matter who is charge of it. [Mister Rand] Oh of course. Because gods are "made up," are they not? Humans cannot easily see molecules and yet they believe these exist. So why do they deny the existence of a god when one is standing right before them? [Mister Rand] Sadly I realize that it is not. But do not be so quick to think I need to change for the rules. I will have my say, sooner or later. Then the rules will bend to me. [Mister Rand] You seem rather accepting of the fact that your realm is so primitive. Does that not bother you?

[glxrious-purpose]

itsbxtgirl​:

14) “I would rather eat glass for the rest of my life than eat whatever this is.” @glxrious-purpose​

Steph stared at the man and merely blinked, unsure exactly what to say to that. “It’s a hot dog, dude.” She sighed and tapped her foot a bit, “I mean, I get it. Vegan and vegetarian eating habits are a sustainable alternative and helps the Earth, but man…a hot dog just hits sometimes. Besides, Gotham hot dogs come from even shadier looking carts and I have only gotten food poisoning once.” She informed him while grabbing her order from the man at the cart, “don’t knock it until you try it!” 

//

Midgard food was passable at the best of times, vile at the worst. Loki was not entirely sure what to make of the strange meat-wrapped-in-bread-topped-with-goodness-knows-what concoction before him, but it strongly leaned towards the latter, hence his remark. The woman's clarification certainly did not help matters. "A hot...dog," he repeated, "An equally ghastly name. I dread to know the explanation behind that." He could hardly imagine such a meal hitting anything, except an upset stomach. "Oh, now that truly makes me feel so much better about it. Do you seriously expect me to still try it? If the sight and scent of it was not bad enough, hearing all that makes me want to vanish it into oblivion."

[glxrious-purpose]

vengeancedemons​:

“Oh, well, if it’s not appreciated, how could I possibly justify continuing it.” Robbie’s tone was just as dry, just as sarcastic. Years ago, he would have been more unsettled by the fact that he was arguing with a damn cat, but a lot had changed since then. He had a vengeance demon living in his head now, a girlfriend who could shake the ground any time he pissed her off. The shit with SHIELD had certainly opened his eyes to a world he’d only ever imagined before, and talking cats were just an extension of that. The fact that most of them seemed to be assholes was also hardly surprising. “Sure. I bet, man.”

The cat turned into a guy, and Robbie let out a huff of air through his nose. Not a talking cat, then. Just some asshole with a serious superiority complex. Better still, an asshole with a superiority complex that had bothered him already in the past. “I’ve met plenty of people who consider me less than,” Robbie replied gruffly. “Hate to tell you, but you thinking you’re better than everybody else doesn’t make it a fact. Shit, it doesn’t even make you unique.”

//

No, Loki had not actually expected the man to cease his sarcasm. He just felt better voicing his displeasure. "Oh, I'm sure you will find a way." As if he was not already doing so. Clearly he had picked a less-than-deal target for his trick, which was disappointing. Though now that Loki was looking more closely at the man, he did seem familiar. Obviously he was yet another bothersome mortal that he had already encountered. One would think it would be difficult for him to run into the same mortals more than once, but sadly that seemed to happen far too frequently. "My my, it seems you have indeed found a way to continue the sarcasm. Congratulations." 

Loki would be glad that others had similar ideas about how low mortals ranked on the cosmic scale, but since it seemed this fool had not taken that advice to heart, he doubted he could get him to believe that either. Especially since he had not listened to Loki before. "And being a god does not make that a fact either? Whatever happened to the days when mortals would revere gods and make offerings to them?" Not that Loki needed offerings, per se, but he would certainly appreciate the reverence. "I beg to differ, but if you do not think that makes me unique, I'm certain many, many other things might. You can claim you have seen everything before all you like, but you cannot deny that I am unlike any other creature in the universe."

[glxrious-purpose]

libertycaps​:

Wishful thinking that he wouldn’t be recognised, though his propensity towards the same had been known for long before Loki Laufeyson took a step foward, assessing him for familiar features. “Is that why you’re so determined to be on the other side of the equation, then?” Steve asked. It felt like a question Natasha would ask, one that she would hum thoughtfully to hear passing his lips. Loki always gave off delusions of grandeur, but it came from somewhere; a jealousy towards his brother that Steve could only admit to understanding on his worst nights, and certainly not since he saw Bucky’s face on that bridge.

The best course of action would be to leave. Loki clearly wasn’t intending to repeat the Battle of New York. If he was, his plan was far more long-term, and certainly wouldn’t be squashed by a man who could hardly walk down the street without fear of an asthma attack. He should return to the Tower, report a sighting, ask Tony for surveillance … but then Loki said magic with a certainty that Steve couldn’t just ignore. “What makes you think that’s what this is?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. It seemed like a pretty logical explanation for talking vegetables and animals singing choruses, but it was also possible they were all trapped in a telepath’s thrall. “Is this you?”

//

Naturally Rogers promptly turned the line of questioning on him, on what Loki was trying to do. Even though his outward appearance had changed somehow, inside he was still just as irritatingly noble. "Oh, the equation. You make it sound so scientific. Stark would be proud." A little dig, since he was aware that the Avengers had been having issues. "Someone needs to put you mortals in your place, after all. I would prefer it to be me, but I will defer to the talkative vegetables for now. They are rather amusing, I must say."

There was no possible way this could be anything other than magic. Even if the feeling of magic had not been all over the city, Loki knew a spell when he saw one. "Experience. Centuries of it, in fact. You however would most likely not know magic if it hit you over the head." The Soldier was not trying to find a scientific explanation for this, was he? He would be waiting for a long time if that was the case. At the question of whether it was his doing, Loki gave a chuckle. "Would that make you more or less at ease if this was my doing? In answer, however, I will merely say that if I had the ability to revert you to this form, I would have done so before you dared to attack me in Germany." That would have made their skirmish much easier, after all, especially now that he was seeing what Rogers had truly looked like before the serum. Remarkable.

[glxrious-purpose]

catalystsofchange​:

(✉️ ➡️ feed me): sure seems that way (✉️ ➡️ feed me): well, personally, anyone who can do trigonometry gets at least a nod from me (✉️ ➡️ feed me): well, ‘handsome’ is pretty subjective. but honestly, even if it weren’t, none of that stuff makes you ‘superior’ to anybody. /nobody/ is superior to anybody else (✉️ ➡️ feed me): honestly? yeah, i do. (✉️ ➡️ feed me): the things that humans do are important /because/ of the limited time they have to do it in. if you live forever, spending a thousand years trying to make the world a better place doesn’t mean anything because it’s a /blip./ you’ve got ten thousand /more/ years that you can spend undoing all of it. but a human spending all the time they get on this world trying to fix it? /that/ means something. even if they fail. maybe especially then.

[Unknown] Thank you for being so concerned about my displeasure. [Unknown] Advanced arithmetic will impress you? I see. What about magic? [Unknown] To those who cannot compare, perhaps. And yes, all of that most certainly does make me superior. You mortals can delude yourselves all you like, but you will be decidedly sorry when you are finally brought to heel by superior beings. Preferably myself. [Unknown] How sad. [Unknown] My my, that was disgustingly maudlin. I promise I am applauding very slowly over here. Do mortals spend that much time trying to justify their pitiful little "contributions"? It is a wonder you have the time to accomplish anything in your lives at all.

[glxrious-purpose]

mistressofmagic​:

“Men.” One word. Zatanna didn’t even look at him as she scowled at his words. Mouthing what he said silently while bobbing her head, clearly annoyed. “You sound like an old man, Loki. That whole get off my lawn attitude doesn’t suit you.” (It did. And it always had. But that was what had been endearing about him at first. There was always something fun happening around him.) “An extra-” she huffed, finally looking at him. “No chance.” She meant stop, but her mind must have wandered toward ice - but she wasn’t about to admit it. No chance in hell. “Really? I had no idea you were born in a realm of ice,” she said, laying it on thick as she put a hand to her chest - but the false humor dropped fast. “Can you put him back together? You’ve got a chaotic brand of magic, I’m sure you can fix this problem you created entirely on your own.” 

//

"Oh, so that is my fault as well? Do forgive me." As if being a man was not enough, he was being an old man, apparently. Though Loki did not like to think of his centuries of existence as being "old," he certainly was by Midgard standards. "Surely I sound like one because I am, though I do not appreciate the derogatory connotation of being more advanced in years. I prefer to say I am more experienced." She was experienced, even he knew that, but she was also still a mortal, and that meant she was not above making a error. "No chance? Really? None whatsoever?" Zatanna's sarcasm was more appreciated than her denial of the possibility of her making a mistake, and Loki offered her a decidedly condescending shake of his head. And naturally now she was expecting him to clean up her mess. He sighed. "A god's work is never done, clearly. At least you recognize when to ask for help from a superior being." He could not say for sure if he could fix him, but the odds were good. "I don't know. Are you going to ask me nicely?"

[glxrious-purpose]

immortalweapon​:

(✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): Sure, he can adjust the process. Not the website, though. He’s not in charge of that (✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): Maybe build up to it? I don’t think leading with it is going to help anything (✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): Just because someone can’t do the impossible doesn’t make them useless. He probably just needs more time to think about how to get you close to where you want to be (✉️ ➡️ Loki L.): Listen, I think maybe you need to… adjust your expectations a little?

[Mister Rand] Then who is in charge of that? I do not care how high I need to go in order to accomplish my goals. [Mister Rand] How exactly do I "build up" to stating what I am? Do you "build up" to other people by telling them you are made of molecules before telling them you are a human? [Mister Rand] Our definition of impossible may differ a little, Mister Rand. What you call impossible, Asgardians have already experienced. And I highly doubt he can find a suitable enough method to overcome what mortal technology lacks. [Mister Rand] I have had to adjust my expectations constantly since coming to this realm, and I am growing weary of doing so. Why does Midgard have to be so blastedly primitive?

[glxrious-purpose]

libertycaps​:

(✉ → Loki): Can’t say I’ve never heard that one before. (✉ → Loki): I wouldn’t exactly use the word ‘serious,’ based on my experience. (✉ → Loki): I could be convinced if I saw something substantial enough to back up the claim. Looks like it’s only words to me right now, though. (✉ → Loki): Besides, I never approved of a leadership model yet that had only one man at the top. (✉ → Loki): Because people shutting up and rolling over is the best way to ensure peace, right? Even if it’s tyranny they’re submitting to? […] (✉ → Loki): Well, yes.

[The Soldier] If you have been told that before, does that not tell you something? [The Soldier] Are you saying you do not take me seriously? That is not an advisable course of action, Captain. [The Soldier] So my sadly unsuccessful invasion did not convince you of my power? Or our brief bout of combat in which I was clearly besting you and would have triumphed  if that metal-suited moron had not interfered. [The Soldier] Oh of course. Because everyone should be equal, right? [The Soldier] I would say so, yes. But I would certainly not use the term "tyranny." I would describe it as "order." [...] [The Soldier] At least we agree on that much.

[glxrious-purpose]

thehoneyxbadger​:

(✉ → loki): Oh you have to watch Buzzfeed Unsolved, it’s great (✉ → loki): I mean I hadn’t seen any ghosts before now and everyone said they were just made up so (✉ → loki): Unsurprisingly condescending reply from you :)

[Mortal Who is Surprised by Magic] I have no idea what that is. Some form of mortal entertainment? [Mortal Who is Surprised by Magic] That does not surprise me. Mortals seem to have difficultly believing in what they cannot see. [Mortal Who is Surprised by Magic] Oh good, I'm glad I am living up to expectations for once. But what is the colon and right parenthesis supposed to mean?

[glxrious-purpose]

vengeancedemons​:

It was days like this when Robbie missed Los Angeles. At least back home, the weirdest thing he’d ever had to worry about out on the streets was him. But here in New York? Even the Ghost Rider was a small fish in a huge pond of shit so weird, it made flaming skulls and deals with the devil look goddamn normal. Shit like, for example, talking goddamn animals. Already, Robbie had dealt with some vieja’s dog sticking its head out of her purse to tell him they’d love to have him over for dinner sometime, and a damn rat in an alley had the nerve to tell him he’d parked his car on its ‘property.’ He wasn’t in the mood for a black cat to show up and start making small talk.

Unfortunately, New York never really gave much of a shit what kind of mood you were in. 

“Yeah, I got a problem with it,” he replied dryly. “Got a whole club about it. Humans Against Talking Cats. We meet on Tuesdays and Thursdays.” Of course, it wasn’t really the talking animals he took issue with. It was everything. The animals, the décor, the damn broomsticks. The chaos of it all had the Rider twitchy in the back of his mind, and the Devil had grown more and more unpredictable since learning of his past. Robbie wasn’t sure he wanted to know what might happen if he released the damn thing right now… but he also wasn’t keen on learning what might happen if he didn’t. Rock, meet hard place. “You seriously think you and your buddies are gonna stage an uprising? Hate to break it to you, güey, but y’all don’t have opposable thumbs.”

//

"The sarcasm is not appreciated...unless I do it," he replied. Clearly this man did not approve of his grand jest. Or, more likely, just did not approve of the animals suddenly being able to talk. Most of the ones Loki had seen had not had anything of value to say, so he was not really wrong on that count. It was just the amusing nature of the whole thing which appealed to Loki. That and he was rather fond of cats, so spending time as one was perfectly permissible. "Oh, do not underestimate the cleverness of cats. We are far more advanced than you mortals give us credit for." 

Hmm, a slip of the tongue, which would likely indicate that Loki was not, in fact, a true cat. Well, this fool was not buying his routine anyway, so there seemed little need to continue it. Turning back into himself, Loki frowned and crossed his arms. "You Midgardians are so cynical, and so harsh on those you deem lesser than yourselves. No wonder you have difficulty grasping the concept of beings who feel you are less than them."

[glxrious-purpose]

catalystsofchange​:

(✉️ ➡️ feed me): boredom, mostly (✉️ ➡️ feed me): eh (✉️ ➡️ feed me): i mean, some of them are okay. but a lot of them have superiority complexes the size of a planet, and i see enough of /those/ from the rich white guys who live around gotham (✉️ ➡️ feed me): oh, so you’re one of the superiority complex ones! glad we got that out of the way, then (✉️ ➡️ feed me): it’s not really the years that matter. plenty of humans make more of a difference in a year than immortal gods make in thousands. immortality, power, glory… none of it means anything on its own, you know (✉️ ➡️ feed me): call it curiosity, then

[Unknown] Lovely. So now I am the target of bored mortals. How nice. [Unknown] You sound like far too many mortals I have met. I am becoming quite curious to know what would actually impress any of you. [Unknown] And is such a mindset unwarranted? How can I not be superior when I am more powerful, more intelligent and more handsome than anyone on this realm? [Unknown] You actually think that one human can do more important things in a year than a god can in thousands? Your mindset is very skewed, I see. [Unknown] Very well, but that does not mean I will indulge your curiosity.

[glxrious-purpose]

kxtepryde​:

“Ha!” Kitty jumped up, pointing, face lit in a grin. It didn’t match Loki’s somber expression in the least, but that was exactly the point. Loki lied. So did everyone else, but everyone else couldn’t exactly be relied upon for it. Tony could have his fun, but he was still someone Kitty ultimately respected. Natasha was just a touch above stranger, and Sharon could keep such a straight face it was so hard to tell. But Loki, Loki was adept at spinning lies, and Kitty knew it. Kitty hadn’t expected certainty, but she felt more certain than ever.

“Sharon lied! Sharon lied.” She really shouldn’t be as excited about that fact as she was, but the whole situation had transcended the questionable existence of Thor’s hair. “He does have hair! Oh, oh I’m going to get her back. I’m going to get her back so good, just wait.” She looked back to Loki, still grinning, “Thank you, this has honestly been the most helpful answer I’ve gotten so far.”

//

Her reaction made Loki raise an eyebrow. Was she excited to think that Thor was bald? Since he was lying, she would be very disappointed when she found out the truth. "I did not think you would be so excited to know the sad truth, my dear," he said, still acting serious. But then she was going on about someone else lying, which made him wonder just what exactly her excitement was about. And then it became clear. She clearly was, correctly, assuming that Loki was lying. Ordinarily he did not mind the assumption, but in this instance, he did not appreciate seemingly being tricked. 

"Are you assuming that since I am the God of Lies that I am lying now? Can you truly be certain of that? What if I assumed the same thing, and actually told the truth?" Matching her smile with a smirk of his own, he continued, "I fear you cannot truly know, can you? Unless you were to go up to Thor and try to grab his hair. And even then you still could not be certain, because he is a god, and even he is not so foolish as to wear a simple, easy-to-remove wig."

[glxrious-purpose]

sovietavenger​:

There was something about this chaos that didn’t bother Natasha. She figured it was something magical in nature - and while she had half a mind to think that it might have been Loki behind it, she doubted that he’d do anything this silly. (So, that brought it to Wanda or Zatanna.) That, and if it had been him, he would have made sure that he wouldn’t have been the target of any of their insults. “Nope,” Natasha said, popping the letter p as she spoke, smirking as the pumpkin laid into him. “They’re not doing any real harm. And they’re entertaining.”

Natasha smirked, looking at the creature that was roasting Loki without remorse, insulting him from his greasy hair to the color of his cloak. “I don’t think he likes you,” she commented, as if she were being so helpful. “You get insulted by vegetables often?” The moment the question was in the air, she answered it herself, internally. He was probably referring to anyone who insulted him with that statement. (Which was funny in its own way. It meant that he got riled up far more often than he wanted to admit.)

“There’s this thing called soap - you might want to try it out - sooner rather than later, bud.”

//

Hearing that Natasha would not fight with the pumpkin was disappointing, especially since it had taken a shine to insulting him. Loki had assumed the heroes would all be out doing glorious battle with the animated decorations and creatures. But then Natasha was surely too smart for something like that, and would not engage in a futile or worthless battle. The longer the creature prattled on, though, the less worthless the idea of battling it seemed. 

"Really. And here I thought it was one of my most ardent admirers," Loki drawled, glaring at the pumpkin as it continued to hop nearby, "Not often, no, but there was a time Thor and I visited a realm with sentient fruits and vegetables. But at least those creatures insulted both of us." This one clearly was not about equal opportunity. When it dared to insult his grooming habits yet again, Loki promptly turned himself into a pumpkin and snapped at the other one, "Oh, why don't you go hop yourself into a pie, you bothersome thing?" The original pumpkin was silent...but only for a moment. 

"Hey, that's a neat trick! You better not hop into a pie though, you'll give somebody indigestion with your greasiness."

Heaving a sigh, Loki turned back into himself. "Perhaps a spell to squash all of these things is in order instead..."