godslayerclaira - Tumblr blog

[godslayerclaira]

nobuddy feels like they have a sharp attention span these days, right? and we all just click “agree on terms of service” because its hard to love yourself sometimes, well

enter Terms of Service, Didn’t Read: a website and a browser addon that streamlines the terms of service of many popular web services to be read by the tech sunday drivers.

It’s graded from A (great) to E (awful) and if you have the addon you have access to the info about the website on your bar

[godslayerclaira]

Get your pussy up get your money up. You’re gorgeous btw

get my pussy up,,,,,,, get my money up,,,,,,,,,

[godslayerclaira]

i love those blinking red lights they put on top of radio towers and windmills and skyscrapers etc, theyre like electronic flowers or something to me

[godslayerclaira]

My one friend group can't stop saying, "See you in hell!" in a cheerful voice instead of, "Talk to you later!" and my other friend group can't stop calling things "penis" instead of "cool" or "good", so I just unironically uttered the phrase, "Sounds penis, see you in hell," as I got off the phone.

[godslayerclaira]

@vague-humanoid remember what you posted about them trying to grab the Black bourgeoisie over to them? Another PR attempt but this time at an HBCU.

[godslayerclaira]

people are witnessing the naked face of the great beast Leviathan lately and they're just not loving the horrific visage

[godslayerclaira]

“whoa do you see what they’re wearing at the met gala-”

[godslayerclaira]

in fucking Tears thinking about how disgusting a baby griffin would look

[godslayerclaira]

Perhaps they ought not to have eaten the dragon. There had been people objecting to it at the time. Surely such meat was poisonous. Perhaps it was even an affront, an insult to some intangible order of nature they ought to honour.

But the city was starving, the siege had gone on too long, and the king's troops were still a week's march away. The scorched earth would be fertile again in time, but right now it was barren. Right now there were mouths to feed. So they changed their crossbows for butcher knives and got to work.

None of the royal commanders asked any questions that could not be answered. After all, their aid had come shamefully late. The dragon's horned skull made a noble gift, a fitting tribute from a triumphant city to its humbled king. Who would have thought to question them?

And none of the townsfolk spoke up, when the first golden-eyed babes were born. Children who grew up barefoot and fearless, clambering over the city's patched and rebuilt roofs like they had no notion of falling, with a strange glitter to their skin when the sunlight hit it just so. No one breathed a word about dragons.

Because soon enough there were deft, young hands taking loaves straight out of the oven, heedlessly lifting iron from the forge, plunging into boiling laundry water. And some of them more wondrous still, wild, warm-skinned youths, with inexplicable knowledge and peculiar remedies.

A blessing, their families said proudly. A blessing after so much hardship. Which it was, in its way. This city would never fear dragon fire again.

[godslayerclaira]

I will be honest guys, the Red portrait of king Charles is gorgeous asdfghjkl

it's a bad portrait. Like. Objectively. It does the opposite of what's intended. It looks like the painter is insulting him. If it was in a contemporary gallery with no context you would see it immediately as the ambivalent criticism of Charles's reign, how he fades into the overwhelming red background as a tiny little figure, small and insignificant, insufficient for the clothes he's wearing. It reminds my of Goya's portraits, how they were so 'realistic' that they ended up making these great figures look pathetic to the viewer. So these are our rulers?

the sheer novelty. the surprise and shock, the kinda cunt it's serving for no reason. I. I love it. It's an incredible portrait by Jonathan Yeo. By the sheer fact that Charles, the man, is impossible to portray as greater than man because he's just such a nothingburger of a dude. So a portrait made to make him look huge and interesting made him be swallowed in red brushstrokes. The butterfly, that reminded me immediately of " we will all laugh at guilded butterflies", draws more attention than him. It looks like an omen. It looks like a warning in all this red. Something is not right here.

This is the best royal portrait ever 10/10

[godslayerclaira]

Ive said this before but swear the biggest skill to learn as an adult is how to resist high-pressure sales tactics. You do NOT have to answer questions with anything other than "Sorry I'm not interested." No matter how nice they are or no matter how many follow up questions they ask or even how agitated they get when you stand your ground. Just keep saying I'm not interested. Don't answer their questions. Don't give them an opening to try to push back on your reasons. Be a fucking brick wall of I'm not interested.

[godslayerclaira]

Tagging this with gay fandoms sorry

There's currently a European proposition to ban conversion practice in Europe

If you're European please sigh it

If you're not please reblog

[godslayerclaira]

[godslayerclaira]

local mourning dove goes viral for show-stopping performance in may 19th dawn chorus. when asked for comment, the rising star simply said “hhhrrroooOOOOO hooooo hoo. hooooo”

[godslayerclaira]

[godslayerclaira]

This astounds me because imagine her leveling with sponfebob like this. Recognizing that he understand what she’s saying. He is an adult sponge and she knows this. He acts like a little gay bitch and he is one but she’s like cut the crap Robert don’t you go sticking that long ass nose into kitchens it doesn’t belong because you can’t handle the heat you can’t handle what I’m cooking. The implications. He can’t handle it, because he’s a pansy, and that she knows he’s a pussy and that he knows he’s a pussy. He’s too soft for her world. Puff has been in state penn. she has been in and out of the system and she THRIVED in it. Her husband is DEAD. He’s a LAMP. She has committed grand larceny and vehicular manslaughter as well as evasion of police and resisting arrest. She’s probably assaulted an officer. Don’t fuck with her. You can’t handle the answer sponfebob so don’t even ask. Go home to your little fruit, get into your three mattress bed and turn off the lights. You are CANONICALLY homosexual.