graignotgreg - Tumblr blog

[graignotgreg]

Oh? Were you swimmin' in the pussy man? 

Oh yes, where I come from I was called, how do you say it, lady killer. Because I was oh so smooth, you know?

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But that's who I am. I can't help it if everyone wants to fuck me! Well havin' sex with is gonna get you fuckin' pregnant, so watch out unless you wanna little fuckin' kid runnin' around. And don't call me fuckin' kid! 

Yeah, but don’t play the asshole guy that fucks everyone, I’d appreciate it, thanks. What the actual fuck? Are you crazy? I’m not gonna get pregnant, you’re not gonna appear on MTV and neither do I so shut the fuck up, kid. Or else, I’ll have to do it myself.

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Definitely a no from me! But you'll find a bitch dude, like no homo or anything but you're a decent kisser.

Is that still a no?

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Woah Noel, what the fuck dude!

No! Dude don't ever kiss me again. You can kiss as many other dudes you want man, just not me. 

I think it was bitching of you.

What about now, brother? If you were a female would you now like to be my bitch?

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Hadley why would I wanna fuckin' leave? Business is better than ever since I got here! Do you know how desparate kids are for weed and shit here? I fuckin' sold this dude a bag of oregano for 60 bucks yesterday because he thought it was weed. 

I was smokin' in the bathroom earlier and a teacher came in...

You’re a fucking idiot. You got sent here for a reason, Graig. If you wanna leave any time soon, I suggest you stop. 

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We're not fuckin' leprechuans, Big Red. We're real people.

I didn’t know they existed in real life.

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Eh, what can I say Faye? She's so hot. 

Yeah I bet all those fuckin' chick on fuckin' MTV said the same shit, but if you do happen to get pregnant or whatever I better get to be on your episode!

Graig, holy fuck!

Wow, I won’t stop making sex because you want, baby boy. Also, there’s no way in hell I’m gonna be pregnant.

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"Wild World" by Cat Stevens

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Ya know in hindsight, teachin' you that word was pretty fuckin' stupid.

That's a definite no. 

I am only trying to spread the good bitch tidings. 

Is that a no?

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You gotta problem with sixteen year old stoners that ride skateboards babe?

Oh lord they’re real.

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No Noel, they're not your bitches at all! They're just your friends.

That's actually a really weird question dude.

They are just my friendly bitches.

If you were a girl would you like to be my bitch?

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Hey, that's pretty fuckin' rude. I'm sixteen, not fourteen.

"Dope" isn’t really the word I’d use. "Dope" is a word generally used by fourteen year old stoners on skateboards.

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Yes! Emma fuckin' Watson. I would search her Chamber of Secrets if ya know what I mean. Yeah not until you're fuckin' married! I'm not gonna have you're little fuckin' kids runnin' around at family reunions yet.

Emma Watson? Oh, she’s pretty. Not as much as I am, but she is. Woah, what the fuck? Till I’m married? Haha, very funny, Graig.

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That actually sounds pretty fuckin' dope. 

All I want right now is popcorn drizzled with chocolate.

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I was smokin' in the bathroom earlier and a teacher came in...

....I blamed it on the kid in the stall next to me and I think he might have gotten put in the Chokey or some shit.

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What the fuck is Kawaii? 

Yeesh, I decide not to do a tutorial for one day and I’m bombarded by an angry subscriber because she needed a new look for her prom. Why would you want look like a kawaii- goth looking rocker for your prom? Unless it was some dark vampire theme prom then soz babe.

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The girl that plays Hermione! That chick is bangin'. Hey hey hey, you better stay abstinent either way! No sex till you're married!

Which fine ass chick from Harry Potter? I know it’s all about genes, but I just wanna see more hot people otherwise I’ll have abstinence, seriously.