guardian-of-sinners

[guardian-of-sinners]

I’ve seen a lot of posts on my dash tonight about users who are threatening suicide, with other Tumblr members posting in effort to try to get ahold of them. I think you all should see this:

IF THERE IS EVER A TUMBLR USER WHO HAS POSTED A GOOD-BYE MESSAGE, SUICIDE NOTE, VIDEO, OR ANYTHING OF THE SORT, PLEASE FOLLOW THIS POST.

1. Scroll to the top of your dashboard.

2. See the circular question mark icon at the top? It’s the third one over from your home symbol. Click on that, and a screen similar to the one in the picture will come up.

3. Where you can type in questions, the box with the magnifying glass at the top, type in the word “suicide.”

4. Click on the first link that shows up. It should say, “Pass the URL of the blog on to us.”

5. Type in the user’s URL and tell Tumblr admin that the user is contemplating suicide and has posted a message indicating that they are going through with it or will be attempting. Hit send! Tumblr administration will perform a number of actions to contact the user and take the necessary steps to prevent the suicide.

TUMBLR: THIS COULD SAVE A USER’S LIFE. PLEASE DO NOT IGNORE SUICIDE THREATS.

Reblog this to keep other users aware. Suicide isn’t a joke, and neither is someone’s life. If you didn’t know this, someone else may not, either. Pass it on.

[guardian-of-sinners]

Aw shit, here we go again

Happiness Will Come To You.

[guardian-of-sinners]

This is just the chicken hat from metal gear

You possess a helmet of complete invulnerability - if you’ve got your helmet on,  nothing can do you wrong. The problem is, its appearance is extremely embarrassing. 

[guardian-of-sinners]

We already plan to eat the rich. Start with the ones who offend you personally.

God I wish there was a wasteland I could banish people to.

[guardian-of-sinners]

To be fair, most of us WANT to be struck down by the gods

you ever meet someone who is just asking to be struck down by the gods

[guardian-of-sinners]

Okay but like this is literally the plot of Dreamworks Studios’ 2009 film Monsters Vs. Aliens.

Aliens have invaded earth with the intention of enslaving all of humanity. However, rescue comes from an unforeseen place. No, not the animals like many on Tumblr have joked about. Rather from beings we had long ago thought were mythical. Vampires, shapeshifters, faires, demons, angels, various cryptids, etc have come out of hiding to fight to save humanity from these invades - even if it’s for their own selfish ends. 

[guardian-of-sinners]

Life is the biggest joke ever told, so laugh and enjoy it.

If you died and had your corpse made into ink, which is then put into a pen, who would you want to write you? And what would you want written?

graffiti a bathroom for me. gimme your best quotes 

[guardian-of-sinners]

Apex Predators were never so attractive

cozy-ghost-loves-love submitted: You may not like it, but this is what Peak Performance looks like.

[guardian-of-sinners]

Half of the people that know me think I’m a violent, murderous bastard, and the other half think I’m just a soft puppy that yaps too much, and at this point I’m too tired and too scared to know which is true

[guardian-of-sinners]

They just want a hug, man

I hate how other planets are so far away. Like, come here lol

[guardian-of-sinners]

hey guys i think @markiplier loves amy but doN’T TELL HER!!! IT’S A SECRET!

[guardian-of-sinners]

The actual saying is "the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb" which means the bonds you choose are stronger than those formed by birth, but syrup is still thicker so pancakes trump all else in life, choice or not.

Blood is thicker than water. But, syrup is thicker than blood. Therefore pancakes are more important than family.

[guardian-of-sinners]

[guardian-of-sinners]

I swiped my credit card on this vending machine and it said “no sale” and just spat out a dollar bill at me??

[guardian-of-sinners]

Witnessing the hidden turmoil of a bromance

last night i woke up because two dudes were fighting underneath my window and one dude kept screaming “BRO!! BRO YOU CALLED ME A BITCH IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE BAR BRO!! THE WHOLE BAR!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT BRO??” he sounded so heart broken. why bro. why did you do this.

[guardian-of-sinners]

a velvety skeleton friend here to bring you financial luck this october 🔮✨

[guardian-of-sinners]

Chaotic Neutral

Upon finding an old dragon skeleton and meeting an old man who was secretly a warlock of some sort, our dragon found an artifact among the bones and refused to give it up causing the old warlock to accuse the group of trying to trick him.

Wizard Ranger: -Begins attacking the old man-

Half-Elf: -Pulls out sword and starts gently tapping the ranger on the head while in a very monotone voice- “No, stop, don’t do that that’s bad.”