haley2017-scstudyabroad

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Some Final Notes from Home

Well, I’ve been back for almost a week now and already everything’s about the same. Well, I’m still constantly excited for all the foods I’ve missed and on the other side of things I’m terribly, terribly out of shape, but even those things will be back to normal soon, hopefully.

Being back is great. It was so nice to spend Christmas with my family and I’m excited to move back to college soon with my friends. Since I only got back on the 23rd, winter break is a lot shorter this year, but there’s still enough time to relax and get my life back in order. So far there is no “reverse culture shock,” except for, of course, missing Russia and Russian culture and missing all my people. But I missed America too and falling back into place here has been easy. I was never really even jet lagged. That being said, it’s barely been a week, and maybe some things will hit later, but I doubt it.

Flying home was a doozy. To be honest, flying by myself in general kind of freaks me out. Customs and security are always intimidating. The airports in every country have their own rules and systems. The woman at Frankfurt security dumped out my whole cosmetics bag into a bin because for Germany I needed to put my liquids in a plastic bag, which was fairly annoying. But, per usual, it wasn’t terrible, just long and a lot. I left St. Petersburg at 6 in the morning, had about a three hour flight to Frankfurt, about a three hour layover, eight hour flight to Toronto, about a three hour layover, and then another short flight later on the tiniest plane in the world and I was with my parents at the airport in Charlotte, finally able to relax. I definitely recommend having sizeable layovers when flying so you don’t have to be stressed out going through customs and security and finding your terminal in time to board your flight. My layovers could be kind of annoying, but I was never worried I wasn’t going to make it onto the next flight toward home, which is really the most important thing. In the end, I’m happy to say both my baggage and I made it safely back to South Carolina.

Now that I’m back, I think I have two goals for the future related to my time abroad, both of which I need to get on top of. 1) I want to go ahead and start planning my next trip to Russia. Probably that trip will happen at minimum two years from now, but I want to go ahead and start planning and start saving. I’m going to go see Lake Baikal in Irkutsk, and hopefully take the Trans-Siberian Railway there. Maybe only the railway if a friend comes along. I’m not sure I could be on a train for a few days with only strangers, but we’ll see how planning goes. Lake Baikal is the only place I really really wanted to go during my time abroad that I couldn’t make work, so now it’s my main goal in going back. Maybe I’ll go with a program again that arranges some kind of study there. Maybe I’ll go by myself. But I’m going to start planning and saving money now to make sure I go and that dream doesn’t just fade into the background. My other goal is to please please please keep up my Russian. Sure, I’ll start back with classes once the new semester begins, but compared to living in Russia, having to often have full conversations in Russian, that’s not gonna cut it. Thankfully, the Russian department at USC usually has some good opportunities to practice speaking Russian. Meanwhile, my plan is to convert all the notes I took while abroad into something legible and study-able. There was lots of grammar I was made aware of, but didn’t fully figure out how to use. I’m going to better study all of that. I’m going to practice reading the texts we went over. We were given a lot of material in Russian class in St. Petersburg and we moved fast and there wasn’t really testing so a lot of times it was hard to fully understand or commit things to memory. But I have all the materials and a better chance to do that now. Of course, this is all just a goal. Once classes start I’ll be totally swamped, but maybe if I start these studying practices over break I’ll be able to keep going. Losing your language skills by not practicing is ridiculously easy and for someone who still doesn’t know a ton, I’ve gained so much. I really don’t want to let it go.

Maybe it’s just the new year talking, but I’m really excited about the future right now. I feel fresh. I’m excited about most of my classes. I’m excited to see my friends. I have my full wardrobe and hair styling capabilities back and I don’t have to wear a hat and a giant parka all the time anymore. The sun is out and I feel happy and relaxed and confident about starting my next semester because the world is a cool, interesting place to enjoy yourself and have experiences and I can handle it. To be clear, I am not saying I feel any of these feelings unaccompanied by large doses of doubt and fear that something is going to go wrong or about my daunting and imminent future graduating from college and entering the “real world.” But at the same time, I am excited. I’m gonna try and have fun with it. Everyday abroad is so cool and exciting, but I live in a beautiful place with lots of great people and lots of cool things to see, so why can’t it be that way at home too? Yeah I’m scared that in a month everything will revert to being just like it was when I left, but I have control over that and right now I’m excited.

So have a good time abroad, kiddies. Enjoy yourself and don’t wait until the day before your flight home to buy souvenirs for all your friends and family and back up all the pictures on your phone!!! It’s a beautiful world out there and there’s a beautiful one back here waiting for you, too.

C любовью from me and St. P,

Haley

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Последний

Here we go, guys. It’s my last blog post from St. Petersburg. Next time I write to you, I’ll already be home. Let’s try not to cry.

I can’t say I’m totally not ready to go home. As much as I love love love this city and the friends I’ve made here, I miss my family and friends. I’m tired of the cold and wet and almost totally dark days where time kind of doesn’t exist and I can get away with sleeping through an entire weekend. I’m ready to finish up with my classwork and take a break. I’m ready to be back home and on my normal schedule with classes, work, and my own place not in the dorms with a twin bed.

It makes me feel ungrateful to say all that. I don’t want to leave. Who knows when I’ll get to come back or when I’ll have such an opportunity or see these people again? But I think these are natural feelings to have. I’m a person who needs change and progress. Studying abroad is wonderful, but it can also be like a state of limbo. Of course I’m changing as a person and learning a lot, but technically when I go home if for some crazy reason I forgot everything that happened here or it all got erased, it wouldn’t directly impact my life. My friends and family will be the same. I’ll move into my new place and get started on new classes. Things will largely go back to how they were before. My classes will transfer and I’ll keep these memories forever, but I’m ready to be back where my actions have real consequences and contribute toward my larger future. I don’t know if all that makes sense. Maybe it’s just a feeling you get while you’re here, but with a strange class schedule and so many fun things to do all the time, it’s kind of like I’ve been this alternate, semi-vacation version of Haley, and I’m kind of ready to be my normal, on-track self again.

That being said, I can’t believe I’m leaving. These last few months have been incredible and taught me a lot about myself, including things I’m capable of that I didn’t know before. When I left the US last September, I was unsure about a lot of things--what I want, what I need as a person. I mean, of course, I’m always unsure, but it was a much more unsteady place than I usually like to inhabit. Being abroad has given me the opportunity to figure out many of those things. It all comes back to liminal space. Being in a new country allowed me to learn things about myself that might have been harder to access back home where I’m comfortable with my normal state of being and unchallenged by my environment. I feel healthier now heading back home and excited to try and apply this semi-new self, or at least somewhat enlightened self, to my old world. Don’t let people waste your time. Don’t let people concern themselves with your business when it doesn’t concern them. Don’t bother with judgemental people. Don’t get yourself stressed out over things not worth it because it’ll only get you upset and not actually help anything. Do what you want to do and take care of yourself and be a good friend to those around you who need it and deserve it because they do the same for you. These are all, of course, obvious things, but they’re also things that I, at least, need to remind myself of often. And this trip has only helped remind and cement the ideas inside me. Maybe I’m still not fluent in Russian, but I’ve got that (and hey, I’m a lot better at Russian than I used to be, too).

So yeah, I’m basically awash with everything right now. Stressed to get everything done, sad to leave, excited to come home, wanting to hang out with my friends, wanting to not leave and hang out with my friends in Russia, wanting to just sleep, waiting to get home and just breathe. And by the end of this week, I’ll have done it all. I just don’t know whether I want this week to be over already or whether I want it to never end. Either way, it’s coming. And St. Petersburg, я вас любил.*

*Side note: I’m rereading this at the airport now before I post it, waiting to board my flight home, and in this moment I can’t say I want to leave at all. Isn’t that the way it always goes. Time to sleep the heartbreak of leaving this beautiful place with its beautiful people off during the next 24 hours of sitting in airports and sleeping on planes. Treasure it all, babies. 

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

All Work and No Play Makes Иван a Dull Человек.

This time next week I will be packing up to head home. It’s nearly impossible to wrap my head around. I will be zipping up my suitcase and getting to bed early in order to wake up at 4 in the morning for the taxi that will take me to the airport to get on the plane that will have me home the night before Christmas Eve. My mom has already promised we can spend all day in our PJs watching the Christmas romcoms we haven’t had a chance to see together yet—mainly The Holiday and Love Actually. Otherwise is it even Christmas?

But before that can happen I have to finish my classes. Unfortunately, they don’t really stop until right before I leave. It would be nice to have more than a couple of days to myself before it’s time to pack, but since that’s not how things worked out, I’m just gonna have to make it work, as one always does. My last big day is the 20th, so I will have the 21st and 22nd to prepare at least. Hopefully those days won’t end up with me frantically running around to get everything done, but I guess we’ll see.

As always, but even more so in my final days in this wonderful city with such wonderful people, the goal is to balance work and play. The last weeks have been stressful as the end grows near and the to do list only gets longer. I’ve had four classes meeting regularly (That’s a lot here, considering each meets for 3-4 hours. On Monday I was in class almost continuously from 9 to 8 at night.) and lots of final projects to wrap up. Meanwhile, my friends headed to Murmansk last weekend in northern Russia for lots of amazing things like swimming in the arctic ocean, playing with husky puppies, dog sledding, and driving snowmobiles through the tundra. I couldn’t go because I had too many classes that weekend I couldn’t afford to miss, but I was endlessly jealous the whole time they were gone and frustrated that I had classwork holding me back from such a cool experience. But after that weekend, I feel a little differently. Of course, I’m still sad I didn’t go, but I spent all weekend resting and being productive and now I feel so much less stressed. By the end of the weekend I had a manageable amount of work before me and now feel confident I will be able to get it all done on time. Having that feeling for my last weeks here instead of spending the rest of the time stressed out and holed up in my room, I think, was just maybe worth missing out on that opportunity. I want to be able to still enjoy the city while I can and because I took the time to be efficiently productive (at least for me) I can. It’s definitely important while you’re here to take advantage of all the one in a lifetime opportunities you can. For most people, it’ll be hard to come back for awhile. But it’s going to be hard to enjoy all those extra activities if you’re always stressed about the work waiting at home. So in my opinion it’s worth it to let yourself step back from certain things in order to get work done and have piece of mind. Of course you want to prioritize and do what’s really important to you, but don’t spread yourself too thin. I didn’t get to play with those husky puppies, but I am getting to fully enjoy my last two weeks in St. Petersburg without just staying in my room and crying over all my work.

I’ll still have to spend a lot of this upcoming weekend doing projects, but I’ll get to hang out with friends and chill some too. Thankfully, most people are having to do work so I’m not missing out on much. For SRAS, you have to present a large capstone project at the end of the year which we’ve been working on since about October. You pick an aspect of Russian culture you’re interested in and interview Russian people about it in order to prepare a small presentation in Russian which you then present to the group and a “panel of judges.” They put a lot of hype on it which makes it really, really stressful. I guess they just want you to take it seriously. But as long as you do the interviews and prepare the work in advance in order to practice some before the due date, it’s completely manageable. Still, I’m ready to get it over with. Once that’s complete, I’ll really be able to relax, get excited about going home, and get fully heartbroken about leaving.

At this point in my blogging life, I’ve told you about everything I can, but I guess this is one last piece of advice. You’re going to want to do everything, but don’t spread yourself too thin. You’re here to take in the culture, and sometimes that includes listening to your Russian foreign policy professor laugh about how the US blames our election results on Russia or holing up in a cafe to write a paper on writers that lived in St. Petersburg. Having fun is important, but so is your mental health. And you’ll be able to have more fun once you’ve taken a moment to rest up and get some work behind you. Trust me, I don’t mean all the time, just once in awhile. Then you can get back to throwing Christmas parties with your friends, visiting your favorite places one last time, buying every souvenir to take home, and playing (more like falling) in the snow. Of course, every second counts, but every second you’re still exposing yourself to the surrounding culture, even if it’s the cafe culture with a pastry and some Russian homework. Don’t worry. You’re doing fine. Well, at least that’s what I keep telling myself.

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Shall We Dance?

If you don’t know already, you should know that Russia is famous for its ballet. It wasn’t invented here, but it was heightened by people like Anna Pavlova (invented pointe), Tchaikovsky (composed ballets that first premiered in Russia like Swan Lake and Sleeping Beauty), and Agrippina Vaganova (created the Vaganova method, still widely used today). I’m talking about this like I know a lot, but I really don’t. I’ve done a little research and my dancer roommate clues me in on all the dance culture around me I otherwise wouldn’t really know about. But this only proves the point I’m trying to make. You don’t have to be a  enthusiast to attend and enjoy the ballet during your time in Russia. This post is to encourage you to check it out, even if at home it’s not something you would be interested in. That’s kind of the whole point of being abroad. You’re participating in another culture and the things that culture finds to be important. In Russia, I think ballet is one of those many things and a really cool one to expose yourself to.

I’ve been to the ballet twice now in St. Petersburg, to the Mikhailovsky Theater to see The Nutcracker and to the more famous Mariinsky to see Swan Lake. The most famous Bolshoi is in Moscow, but often ballerinas train in St. Petersburg and then go to Moscow to work there, so St. Petersburg citizens say great talent is crafted in St. Petersburg and then just goes to Moscow to work. Anyways, I loved it both times and I don’t know a lick about ballet. What I do know, like almost all people, is how to be amazed at incredible skill and talent. If you can do that, and you enjoy it as you should, you’ll have no problem enjoying watching a bunch of crazy strong and impressive people leap, twirl, and dance gracefully across the stage. I also really love to recognize and put context to the famous music I’ve been hearing randomly around me for years. You have to try to not recognize the great compositions from musicals like The Nutcracker and Swan Lake. That music is everywhere and at the ballet you can see and hear it as it was intended. Of course, it’s great to go to ballets you aren’t familiar with the music of too. My roommate’s favorite ballet is Romeo and Juliet, which she wanted me to go see here, because she thinks it has the best choreography. But recognizing the music really heightened my personal enjoyment of the performances.

Going to the ballet in Russia is also just an event within itself. Everyone dresses up very nice, showing off fancy dresses and suits as they remove their bulky coats at coat check. A million adorable little girls put on their best sparkly outfits to watch the ballerinas they’re probably still dreaming of becoming. During intermission you can feel even fancier, purchasing a glass of champagne or an eclair as you wait for the next act to begin. It’s a wonderfully festive part of Russian culture I highly recommend taking part in no matter how much or little you care about ballet. If anything, it’s just another way to step out of your comfort zone and normal routine while you’re abroad and experience something new. Tickets can be expensive, but you can see plenty well from even the nosebleed seats and they take less of a toll on your wallet. Anyway, it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity and, if you have the means, take advantage of it.

Inside and outside of the Mariinsky. 

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Weekend in Оленьи Ручьи

Like I’ve said before, you can’t do everything you want to do during your time abroad. But you can do something, even just one thing, that’s so amazing you don’t really need to have traveled anywhere else.

That’s how I feel after my weekend at Оленьи Ручьи (Deer Springs in English). It’s a small park outside of Yekaterinburg, seemingly in the middle of nowhere, a total hidden (at least to me) Russian gem. 

In St. Petersburg, people often say you aren’t getting the “real” Russian experience. It’s a very western city. Almost everyone speaks English. You’re definitely catered to as a tourist or a foreign student. I cannot say the same for Yekaterinburg and Deer Springs. Yekaterinburg feels Russian, still seeming to have the Soviet touch resting heavily on top of it. We flew into this freezing cold place at around 5 in the morning. In order to not miss any class, but still have the most time we could in the park, we traveled when we would be sleeping—Friday and Sunday night, getting home at 6 in the morning on Monday. We ended up rolling back into St. Petersburg very tired, but we got a lot done in those two days because of this, so I think it was worth it. We slept at the park’s hotel only on Saturday night. Sunday night we spent in the bus station and the airport so we would be there for our flight at 5 in the morning.

Оленьи Ручьи has their own official website—in Russian and only found if you google the park name in Russian—but it’s still a kind of hard place to gather information on. The instructions on how there are a bit confusing, maybe due to translation difficulties. I was in charge of researching the trip and all I really managed to know was that we had to get somewhere called the south bus station (Южный Автовокзал--I had the address as well) and then we had to find a bus headed toward Mikhailovsk, on which we would have to tell the driver where we were going so he could make the special stop. After that it was a 2 km walk to the park entrance. So, yeah, everything felt like a little bit of a gamble. Thankfully I was traveling with friends not easily stressed and willing to just help me figure out things on the way. And hey, it all worked out perfectly. So there. (But mostly because Zach speaks better Russian than me and asked people everywhere we went how to get to the next place. Practicing those language skills, yo. That’s an educational vacation right there.)

After the bus from the airport to the station and a few hours waiting there for another bus that would take us almost all the way to the park, we were on the about two hour ride to our destination. While we all slept for a lot of the ride, the part that I was awake for was filled with interesting views of an almost hillside-village seeming place, older houses stacked on top of each other with beautiful Russian details around the doors and trim. The bus took us further and further from civilization until we were dropped off on a large, desolate road and told to walk “that way.” The walk was shorter than we expected, pleasant on a snowy and sunny day, and we finally arrived.

People in St. Petersburg are nice most of the time, but it’s still a city. Locals are fast and have places to be. We visited Deer Springs in the off-season when it seems like basically only the workers live there. They were smiley and kind, working with us to communicate using our sub-par Russian. I spent five minutes trying to explain that we needed bedding since I forgot the word for sheets and finally the woman said бельё? And I said да да да да да! And we all laughed at the silliness of the situation. No one was impatient with somewhere else to be. They explained all the hiking routes to us and which one was best to do when and how long it would take. They helped us arrange our banya visit. Outside of the main office, an excursion guide approached us offering more information or to accompany us on a hike, but even after we told her we’d prefer to do it on our own, she wasn’t mean or pushy because we wasted her time. She just smiled and let us go on our way, continuing to offer us information throughout our time in the park. I think sometimes what I miss most about being in a country where I speak the language is not being afraid to just walk up to someone and ask them a question because there’s no risk or difficulty in it, but I got to kind of feel like that again at Deer Springs because everyone always wanted to help.

In terms of activities during our two days in the park, we were surprisingly efficient with our time. You can’t do the longest hike the park has to offer in the winter (I think it’s around 24 km or 15 miles) because of something to do with the water freezing and a bridge. I’m not sure exactly because, as we’ve gone over, my Russian is not that great. But there were two hikes that we did, one each day. Since we got to the park around noon our first day, we started off with the shorter one, which was supposed to take around 3 hours, but I think took us less, even with dallying at all the amazing views. If you’re worried about hiking, neither hike was super difficult. Even the longer one only had one major hill. It did, however, have a lot of stairs so maybe if that’s a difficulty for you, beware. We got up early on Sunday (by early I mean like 9) to do the second, longer one, which was supposed to take 6 or 7 hours, but, again, took us a little less. I think the park overestimates a little just for a cushion, which was nice because we were never in a rush to get back. They were both extremely amazing and definitely worth the time.

After our first hike, we enjoyed the park’s banya services. A man took us to what was basically our own personal banya for the next four hours. He taught us how to use it, gave us tea to sip on, and left us to relax. Between periods in the banya, we ran outside to roll around in the snow. When we were done, we put the fire out and headed back to our hotel room for a solid sleep. It was the perfect end to a long day.

As I said, our second and, unfortunately, last day was taken up by the longer of the two hikes. It was, of course, stunning, going past a stone angel the park is known for and a few long, suspended bridges that cast you out over frozen, grey waters. It ends with a descent into a huge cave, which is, um, kind of scary, but very doable and very cool. We ate lunch at the bottom of the cave and headed back. I was worried about getting cold and miserable on such a long hike through the snow, but it never happened. It was a sunny day and really not that cold, especially breaking a small sweat hiking. Disclaimer: I did wear three layers of pants and three layers of shirts, plus all my outerwear. But, hey, I’d rather be sweating a little than cold.

I was kind of worried about getting back to town that night because we didn’t have tickets for the return bus (we were just kind of fingers-crossing they would let us buy them when the bus pulled up) but the night before when we were walking home from the banya, a random woman who works in the park offered to take us with her back to Yekaterinburg the next day. We met her in the evening and, in exchange for some gas money, were back to the bus station in a couple of hours, and sleepy, but home by the next day.

My description in this blog post is more about logistics and how to arrange the trip than anything else. If you want your proof for why you should take the time, just look at the pictures and know they still don’t do the park justice. I can’t imagine a trip during my time abroad that would have felt more perfect and worthwhile. Just another reason to be a little heartbroken about heading home in the next three weeks.

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.

I gotta tell you sometimes I look at the desk in my room and think why the heck did you bring that? You had such limited space, you took out so much from your suitcase, and you decided to keep that??

So this week’s blog is about packing, and how to do it better than I did: a precautionary tale.

If you’re like me, the problem is not going to be how much you can fit in your suitcase, but how much your suitcase weighs once you put all the stuff you want in it. I originally bought space bags because I thought it was going to be difficult to fit everything in the one bag I could check for free, but airlines have weight limits, at least the one I traveled by did, and that’s a much harder constraint to adhere to. In the end, it wasn’t even kind of hard to get my suitcase closed because I had thrown so much out in order to be right at the limit. I also stuffed a ton of things into my carry-on backpack. The carry-on bag supposedly has a weight limit as well, but I don’t think anyone really checks for that, so if you have heavy things you want to bring, I recommend stowing them there and just deal with lugging around a heavy bag for a day. You’re gonna need to make whatever sacrifices you can if you want to bring everything you want to bring.

I guess the disclaimer to this is that I prefer to have a lot of different clothing. Maybe if that’s not a need you have, you’ll fair better than I did. But odds are if you don’t like lots of clothing, you like lots of some other comfort. And you’re gonna want your things that bring you comfort in a foreign country. The key is deciding what comforts to bring and what necessities and how to balance those things.

In terms of necessities, if it’s something you can buy here easily, that’s kind of what I recommend. I brought my own shampoo and conditioner (I do use a special kind, but I don’t have to.) when really I could have just bought that when I got here. Really I think if I went back in time I would just buy all new things like that when I got here. Sure, bring your toothbrush and toothpaste, but just buy a hairbrush here. Any cosmetic/toiletry you don’t need a specific kind of or need right when you get here, you’ll be able to just buy in the first couple of days and I think that would save a decent amount of room.

In terms of deciding what clothing you want, definitely do the neutrals/basics thing if you’re good at that. (I am not). You’re gonna be wearing the same 10 outfits for half of a year, which personally drives me crazy, so bring lots of neutral shirts and pants and dresses and whatever and then you can have some different jackets and scarves to pretend you’re changing it up. DON’T BRING ANY CLOTHES YOU AREN’T SURE YOU LOVE. I bought a fair amount of new clothes for St. Petersburg and some of them I ended up not really liking and not wanting to wear a lot, which doesn’t work out well considering I only have a few options to begin with. Bring your favorite clothes. Bring the clothes you know you always want to wear. Don’t bring that new flowery blouse you’ve never even worn out before. Also, I miss my favorite sweatpants and sweatshirt. I didn’t think that was a comfort I would mind not having with me. I have lots of comfy sweaters I figured would substitute, but I really really miss just putting on a sweatshirt. So maybe think about things like that. I am most thankful here for my huge, warm scarf, my comfy pants, my soft, plain v-necks, and my one, dependable cardigan. I definitely prefer the basics I brought that are chill and I can throw on whenever without thinking and still feel semi-cute. Also, of course, like everyone tells you, layers. Also, if there’s something easy that you definitely need, but you don’t have a favorite of, like a winter hat, you can forgo bringing one and buy that kind of thing here, and then it’s like a warm hat and a souvenir--two birds, one stone.

Needless to say there are some things you like in America that are just different or less available in Russia, so if it’s super important to have a specific kind of something for your day to day and you don’t want to have to search for it here, bring it. They do not have disposable cameras here. They have makeup stores that are basically the same as ours, so you’ll have access to those things. I’m currently using a weird spray deodorant I don’t love, but I didn’t really look beyond the grocery store for my normal kind so it might be around here somewhere. The dorms here supply fine bedding and towels, so you don’t need any of that. Well, the towel is only a little bigger than a hand towel, but it’s okay to use.

There are the comforts in life you’re willing to go without and there are those you really miss when they’re gone. It’s hard to know exactly which is which all the time, but it’s a good thing to keep in mind when you’re packing for your time abroad. What on your absolute worst day do you grab or put on or read to feel better? I couldn’t bring my mom, but I did bring my favorite scarf and my book of Frank O’Hara poetry. Close as I could get.

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Reflections After a Weekend Away

This blog post is coming to you from Vienna, Austria, where I’ve just spent the weekend with my best friend exploring streets covered in grand buildings and adorable Christmas markets. If you want days filled with hot food--sausages, bread bowls, giant donuts, things covered in chocolate--delicious drinks, and tons of trinkets you’re going to want to buy all of, I highly recommend Vienna in the Christmas season. (Not that I’ve been any other times.) We were lucky enough to have it officially start this weekend, when all the markets begin to open up in late November.

I’m still constantly on the fence about travel outside of Russia while studying abroad here. I am so happy I got to go on this trip. A weekend in Europe with my best friend, Grace, was incredible and it made me wish I had set up more weekends to travel through Europe while I’m over here. But I always have to remind myself how kind difficult that is in my situation/program. You don’t receive the multi-entry visa, which allows you to leave Russia and come back, until at least mid-October and by then you’re in the thick of classes you can’t really miss more than one of—that is, if you have to take a lot of electives like me. They meet around 6 to 8 times and you aren’t supposed to miss more than 20% of the meetings. Originally when I planned this trip (leaving Thursday night) I had to miss two different electives classes—the maximum I can miss of each, making any other weekend either class was scheduled for (three or four other weekends) ones I will not be able to leave St. Petersburg during. You really need to leave at least by Thursday night to make a weekend of far away travel worth it, and many elective classes occur on Fridays. I had more free time at the beginning of the semester, but then I was just getting my bearings and couldn’t leave the country anyway.

I think the only correction I could make if I went back in time would be to travel around Russia more in those first weeks/months before electives got really intense. (For some people it’s the opposite--electives are more intense at the beginning of the semester before lightening up.) I could have spent more weekends in other Russian cities, and maybe had more time to travel outside of Russia later once my visa was reissued. 

Honestly, I’m not sure I would even change that. I wasn’t really in the mindset to plan travel then. I wanted to learn my city and get to know people. But it is my suggestion to people for whom travel is really important. It’s about priorities. If you want to have the maximum amount of time to travel in Russia and outside of it and you have to take electives, plan your Russia trips during the time when you don’t yet have your multi-entry visa, and then the rest of your free weekends can be dedicated to places outside of Russia. But be careful not to lose the valuable weekends spent in your own city, exploring what’s around you, learning about the people you’re with.

Next weekend I’m flying into Yekaterinburg to visit a nearby park--Deer Springs or Оленьи Ручьи in Russian--and hike in the Urals. (Don’t worry. There will be a blog. I’m so excited.) This, for instance, is a trip I could have taken earlier in the semester when I had more time and could only travel in Russia. A better planner, more on top of things person probably would have done this. I am not this person, but I guess my hope is that maybe with this blog post you have a better chance to be. And if you still aren’t, don’t worry. As much as I have loved this weekend, as much as I wish I was seeing more of Europe since it’s so hard to get back here, I do not regret any of my cozy, sleepy St. Petersburg weekends. When you are in such a beautiful place, seeing and living amongst another culture and the interesting things that make it up, I think it is stupid to regret anything (except maybe staying in your room too much.)

I do recommend, if you’re able, staying for a week or two after your program to do any travel you don’t have time for during your school semester. I want so badly to go and see Lake Baikal, but there is literally no time. If I was staying through the holiday season after school ends, as many students are, I would have time to do this trip while I’m here, but I’m heading home after classes end for Christmas with my family. I can’t say I’m unhappy about this, but sometimes it feels like a shame not to have taken more time while I’m already here. Now I just have to promise myself that right when I get home I’ll start saving up to come back someday.

When you get here, or even before you come, decide what big travel is really important to you. Pick one or two places and figure those out. Maybe you’ll be able to do more than that, but at least this way you’re going to go home and say that was too short a trip, but at least I made sure to do this or see this and be grateful for those moments. I really wanted to go hiking in the Urals, so I spent all of my time figuring out how to do that. Even now it is a short, rushed weekend, but I’m still doing it because I decided it was the one thing I was going to make sure I got to do, even if I had to spend more money, even if I had to spend 4 hours on a bus, even if I had to get on a flight at 5 in the morning. (I only ended up having to do one of these things, thankfully.) And plan for yourself. Don’t stress yourself out about other people coming. If they want to, they will. But if it’s really important to you, just take care of getting yourself there. Don’t sacrifice the experience worrying about other obstacles. Figure out how to get yourself there and do it. If you have too much anxiety, know that I am currently sitting on a random bench in Vienna, no phone, no wifi, typing this on the notes in my laptop. I have 14 euros and a metro map in my purse so I can get to the airport in a bit. I had Grace and her phone all weekend to help us get around, making things a lot easier, but you can handle travel by yourself. I’m not saying I haven’t been alone and stressed out sometimes this week, but I managed and it’s worth it. My friend Grace doesn’t really speak any language other than English and she travels to a new country almost every weekend, taking care of herself and having a great time. She’s a brave person, but you can be too. And if you’re terrible at “adulting” like me, you’ll definitely learn some good lessons on responsibility, growing up, and taking care of yourself on the way.

I’m still hoping to visit Finland before I head back to America, but if that doesn’t happen I’ll be okay. This weekend has been so wonderful and special. My whole time abroad already has been so wonderful and special. It’s about experiencing everything that’s important to you while you can. Let yourself do what you need to do and what you want to do and what you can do. Always be grateful. Don’t take anything for granted. Other clichés everyone who studies abroad will tell you. But they’re good mantras to remember. There is this whole crazy world to sit and obsess over, but then you look up from your laptop and see a gorgeous building in front of you and you remember you’re in Austria or St. Petersburg and maybe you don’t know what you’re looking at, but people built it, which feels like it should be impossible, to create such a thing, and so many of your anxieties seem stupid to worry about because the world has existed for so long and someone crafted these giant, gorgeous buildings that are still there, and all the not so grand but still beautiful ones in between them, and here you are getting to see it.

I guess all I’m saying is that here in this blog are some helpful logistics, but I think the real secret to travel (from, disclaimer, someone who still hasn’t traveled a ton) is figure out what you really want to do and find a way to go do it.

Even if it sometimes takes awhile. I’m coming back for you, Lake Baikal.

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Also, side note: I recently lost a significant amount of photos from my time abroad (literally heart breaking) because my phone broke, so back up your dang, once in a lifetime memories!!!

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Taking a Moment for Yourself

This week’s blog post was going to be about budgeting in a big city…

But that seems kind of boring to write.

Of course, if you want me to answer your boring, practical, financial questions, feel free to message me on your own, but this is my travel blog, so, per usual, I’m going to tell you about something much less helpful and much more indulgent:

the novelty of visiting museums alone.

Inevitably, if you are to “truly” experience St. Petersburg, you will be visiting a lot of museums. Well, not just museums, but palaces and churches and monuments as well. Essentially, places where you whisper and observe the grand expanse of culture and history set before you like an essay or story or conversation, which, instead of reading, you can experience visually. Sometimes they will run together, but give yourself breaks, and space them out, and try to see as much as you can handle. You never know which one you’re going to stumble upon that will truly leave you in complete awe or heartbreak. I, personally, will never get over seeing the church at the monastery in Novgorod or St. Petersburg’s mass grave, which the city was forced to create following WWII and the Siege of Leningrad--the largest mass grave in the world.

What I have discovered throughout all of these visits is that I prefer to do such observation alone. And, well, I can’t decide how you feel or what you want to feel, but I kind of think everyone should, at least sometimes. It might be me being pretentious, but there’s something a bit limiting about going with other people, especially a lot of other people, limiting to yourself and to the culture you’re observing. At the Tretyakov Museum in Moscow, I was on a set mission to see my favorite Russian painting, They Did Not Expect Him by Ilya Repin. I even asked the person I was with to let me go see it alone, which was probably rude, but what I needed. He asked me at one point why the painting is my favorite, and questions like that are how I know it’s right, for me at least, to have this kind of experience alone. How am I, a person who knows essentially nothing about art and about the world, supposed to explain this painting to you and what it means to me? Every word I have that could manage that in a moment would become worthless if I were to say them in the presence of that painting. Maybe a person who has been trained to talk about art would not feel this way, but I know I could never do that painting justice, especially when it’s right there to look at with your own eyes. I think about wandering around a museum with another person and trying to make the appropriate comments to each other, like “wow, look at that” and “I really love this” and I just feel like I’m trivializing the whole experience. All of these huge feelings and abstractions and cultural moments are set before you and now we’re supposed to talk about them in simple vernacular? I can’t do it. It reminds me of this summer when I interned at South Carolina Public Radio and my boss told me you can’t call featured artists “talented” on air because it sounds like you are deeming yourself the authority that decides who is talented and who is not. They all, in that case and in this one, deserve so much more. My lame whisper of “the colors are so cool” to the person next to me isn’t gonna cut it. Such places are quiet for a reason.

Of course, it depends on what kind of experience you want. Sometimes you just want to go somewhere and feel lighthearted about things. You want to laugh with your friends about how the dude in that painting looks like Fabio or the “interactive” exhibit that’s just a bottle of vodka on a table, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But some of my favorite moments in St. Petersburg have been going to these places by myself and just being quiet, soaking everything in. It’s just you and your thoughts and something beautiful or strange or so old you can’t even imagine who else stood before it prior to yourself.

So what I’m saying I guess is don’t knock it ‘til you try it. And definitely when you’re here, especially studying abroad, there will be times when you want to be alone and not have to talk. I suggest sometimes embracing these moments out in the world, not curled up in your room. It’s not something I do every week. Places I’m really excited about, like seeing the Bronze Horseman for the first time, I go to alone to make sure the moment won’t be spoiled. (Did I mention I’m pretentious?) Really, other than that, I’ve only visited Erarta (the contemporary art museum) and the Anna Akhmatova museum alone, but they were such wonderful, peaceful moments of just appreciating where I am and what I’m among. And I don’t need to ask anyone to understand why walking into an alley covered with graffiti that is Anna Akhmatova’s poetry, which people have covered the walls with that lead to where she once lived, makes me smile so much.

So it’s food for thought. Do things how you feel comfortable doing them, but don’t be afraid to sometimes go places and experience things alone. Not alone, but just only with yourself. It’s good company, I promise.

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Are You a St. Petersburg Person or a Moscow Person?

The SRAS global partner program has many options for study abroad in Russia. I chose St. Petersburg mainly because of the historical and literary background this city holds, but each option has its own amazing draws. Since I’m only experiencing one place fully, that’s all I’m able to share, but I have gotten the opportunity to visit Moscow and interact with SRAS students there, and they came to visit SPB as well. When I think about it, I didn’t really consider study abroad in Moscow. I didn’t know to wonder whether I would be a St. Petersburg person or a Moscow person, which actually turns out is a thing. While I loved loved loved visiting Moscow, I think I got lucky and chose right for myself with St. Petersburg. It’s smaller, more manageable for someone who’s already not a big city person, and there’s still an endless amount of necessary activities. Plus, I really appreciate my close proximity to nature, despite living in a city. (This may also be a thing in Moscow. I’m not sure.) But since I myself never really considered which of Russia’s major cities I would work better in, I thought it could be helpful to give other students this opportunity. Through a little compare and contrast of the two cities, put together with the help of Katheryn, who studies in Moscow also through SRAS, here’s a small chance to try and decipher which of these two beautiful places you might prefer.

In order to look at Katheryn’s opinion through the appropriate lense, you should know that at her home university she studies rhetoric and history. She says that, because her previous classes there have focused mostly on Russian politics and history, rather than art and literature, she had more background knowledge on Moscow, which partly led to her studying there. I definitely can say the same for my decision. My favorite Russian culture course thus far has been Russian Modernism, which focused on the literary movements of the 20th century in Russia and the history behind them. One of the most incredible books we studied is literally called Petersburg.  (Andrei Bely. Read it.) So I can definitely agree with Katheryn about the fact that those classes informed my decision. If you’ve had the chance to take Russian non-language courses before, try and remember what parts you really enjoyed, and maybe check out which city lends itself more to those topics. However don’t let this be too definitive if you’re on the fence. In the end, each city has a bit of both.

Here in Russia, Katheryn is apart of the Russia as a Second Language program, which includes a higher number of language class hours than elective class hours. I’m in the Russian Studies Abroad program which has less language and more electives. This decision is really just based on which you need/want more hours studying. I needed more electives in order to fulfill my Russian major, while many students want to focus more on improving their Russian. If you don’t need the elective hours, I would recommend the RSL route, as you will never get better Russian language courses than there are IN RUSSIA, and the classes can be extremely rewarding. However, I’m not unhappy to be an RSA student. I get to study politics, history, and literature all from the distinct Russian perspective.

That’s all just background. For more specific details about life in Moscow and MGU, I asked Katheryn to paint me a couple of pictures, which I’ve interjected my own comments into here:

Her Typical Day

Katheryn: I tend to wake up around 9am, get ready for the day and leave my dorm pretty quickly. I’m not very productive in my room (because...bed), so I’ll head to the stolovaya or a building with good internet to knock out some work before class. My classes run from 12 - 6 on Monday, and 12 - 4 Tuesday through Friday. After, I’ll do some homework, watch some Russian movies, head to the center, or explore on my own. I’m involved with SRAS’ Home and Abroad internship program, so my workload is a little heavier than some of my classmates, but I still have plenty of time to enjoy myself.

From the sound of it, Katheryn is a much more productive person than I am, but our class schedules are a bit different. For one, hers seems more predictable. As I’ve mentioned before, class scheduling in SPB can get a little hectic. Electives run different hours every week, starting and ending abruptly after five or eight or ten meetings. Russian language has a consistent schedule, but some days meets at 9, some days at 10:50, some days at 12:40 etc. It keeps you on your toes. However, when you don’t have class, all those same possibilities Katheryn mentioned are available in St. Petersburg, too.

Moscow’s Typical Weather  

Katheryn: I arrived mid-September and it’s now late-October. It was already sweater weather when I arrived and would usually drizzle in the morning but clear up before I left the dorm. The drizzle has now transitioned to snow flurries -- but nothing that actually sticks. There have only been a couple days of true “rain.”

Again, not so different--well, except for there only being a “few” days of rain. In St. Petersburg, leaving your room without an umbrella, even on the clearest of days, is playing a dangerous game. (The weekend I spent in Moscow was also very rainy, but that was only one weekend.) We’ve just started getting snow flurries, as well! So exciting, even though nothing has resulted from them yet. Locals in St. P often mention how, in the past years, Russian winters have gotten less and less foreboding, but hopefully soon we’ll see some real snow blanketing the city.

The City

Katheryn: Although Moscow has a New York City kind of vibe, the two cities are completely different. While NY has a population of 8.5 million, Moscow has 15 million, but feels less crowded. (Does not hold true for rush-hour metro travel. Buh-bye, personal space!) The city itself is much larger, and the infrastructure is appropriately designed to accommodate the population (both pedestrians AND motorists.. go figure!!). It’s also less expensive.

Even in our few days in Moscow, I can definitely agree that it felt less crowded. The streets and sidewalks are much wider than here in tiny, cramped St. Petersburg. Walking down a crowded street here can get annoying if you want to get somewhere fast or walk alongside a friend. People are always stopping without concern right in front of you to talk for a second before continuing on, rendering the sidewalk completely useless. But that’s mainly in the city center or more popular crowded areas. Just a couple streets over in any direction, things can clear up and calm down. I’ve gone running a couple of times here and, as long as I choose a route I know less people traffic, there’s no problem having a clear path. (Also side note I just remembered, Moscow had suuuch good stolovayas.)

The People

Katheryn: Generally speaking, most people are self-aware, yet completely uninterested in my existence unless we’re directly engaged. I think Arseny Khalashnikoff said it best: “If you drop your metro card in New York, people probably won't notice. In Moscow, however, an old lady will run after you down the street to give it back, and then say what a fool you are for walking so fast and being an absent-minded loser… Where’s your ‘thank you,’ by the way? You should have learned good manners from your mother.”

This is true for St. Petersburg, as well, and, somewhat begrudgingly, one of my favorite things. Once I walked from my room to the metro (probably ten minutes) with one of my shoes untied, and I think I was stopped by about four different people who really really needed to tell me that my shoe was untied. It can be somewhat pestering, but when you think about it, people are just looking out. It’s a strange kindness I have never been exposed to and never would have expected.

The Ideal Day in Moscow

Katheryn: Yesterday was pretty perfect. Class was cancelled, so I met a friend for lunch in the center. Once we separated, I found a cozy coffee shop with good internet and fresh donuts, sat down and knocked out some homework. After a couple hours I ventured to the Bulgakov Museum and explored the surrounding area, including Patriarch’s Pond. A friend hit me up while I was buying some snacks at a grocery store and I soon found myself in a sixth story bar with a panorama of the city. After having our fun, we went home and readied ourselves for the next day.

An awesome sounding day, in my opinion, and very doable in St. Petersburg, as well. I’d say my favorite days here are definitely the ones spent exploring hidden parts of the city via metro or taking the train out a couple of stops to smaller, more residential towns.

Favorite Part of Moscow

Katheryn: It’s not so much a place as an institution: the Moscow Metro. It’s really exciting to head somewhere new and have no idea what kind of metro your destination will have. The architecture, marble, murals, and mosaics at each station reflect the time and place of their construction. Functional art!

I only got to see a few, but the Moscow metro stops were really very beautiful. I can understand why it would make traveling on that explosion of public transport more enjoyable. No shade, I am just not a big city girl and that thing is super big and complex. I’m very appreciative of how simple the metro is in St. Petersburg.

Meeting with Locals

Katheryn: There are plenty of opportunities if you’re willing to put yourself out there. There are Facebook groups like Moscow Language Exchange and Давай по-русский that host weekly gatherings. Anticafes (coffee shops where you pay for your time, not what you eat/drink) and free walking tours are also a good way to meet people and practice using the language. If you meet someone you’d like to see again, don’t be shy about asking for their contact information! You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain.

I can’t say I’ve tried these methods in St. P, but I’m sure similar possibilities are available. I love anticafes here and I’ve heard they’re a great way to meet locals because the atmosphere really encourages casual chatting with those around you. And our program coordinators are always encouraging us to just talk to people and make contacts. People want to talk about themselves, you know. However, I’m perhaps a bit more awkward than Katheryn, so I’m thankful that SRAS (at least in St. Petersburg) offers programs like language buddies, where you’re put in touch with someone who wants to practice their english and with whom you can practice your Russian. They also host fun events in order to help  English- and Russian-speaking students to interact. 

Living Accommodations

Katheryn: I live in Moscow State’s iconic Main Building -- one of Stalin’s “Seven Sisters.” To get to my room I have to pass through the main security checkpoint, my building checkpoint, take an elevator, say hello to my floor dezhurnaya, walk through a long hallway and unlock my door. I share a small suite with one other girl, and both the entry way, a small toilet room and a shower room are in the common space, which is no larger than one king-sized bed. We have our own rooms furnished with a twin bed, desk, bookcase, closet, chair and large window. There are common kitchens scattered throughout each wing, and, although we don’t have a fridge, the window is cold enough to keep my produce cold. There are also like, four different cafeterias within five minutes of the dorm. The nearest metro is a ten-ish minute walk, and the grocery store/shopping mall another seven or so minutes further.  

I cannot say we live in such a beautiful building here in St. Petersburg, but the accomodations are still very nice. The dorms are approximately three seconds from where all the international students have class, and the whole area is enclosed, although the gate is only actually closed late at night and on the weekends. When it’s closed you have to go through a special door, which requires showing your dorm ID. When it’s open, you only have to show the ID in order to enter your dorm. There are two dorm buildings--lestnitsa 7 and lestnitsa 8. I think most Americans usually end up in lestnitsa 7, which has mostly small-ish single rooms with their own bathrooms and then a shared hall kitchen. Only a few people share their rooms. I think that in lestnitsa 8 there are more shared rooms and the bathrooms are also a common space, but I’m not positive. Everything you need is extremely close to the dorms.

Who You Spend Time With

Katheryn: I spend most of my time with the people I’ve met through language exchange meetups, but still occasionally hang out with students from class.  

Alternatively, I spend most of my time with fellow international students I’ve met through the program or class. We sometimes meet up with the few Russian students we’ve met, or I hang out with my language buddy who shows me around the city. 

Hardest Part of Living in Moscow

Katheryn: The hardest part of living in Moscow is true for all of Russia -- it’s almost impossible to find tacos!! As far as products go, pretty much everything is available and cheaper than in America -- but if you’re fond of specific brands (for me, it’s facewash), make sure to bring a good supply.  

Oh my god, yes, get your fill of tacos before you come!

St. Petersburg from a Moscow Student’s Perspective

Katheryn: I really enjoyed my time in St. Petersburg, but it’s true that the two cities are completely different. The sidewalks in St. Pete are much smaller, the weather much damper, and the metro less necessary for daily tasks. It’s also true that the St. Pete students are much more cohesive than we are. The locals I met in St. Petersburg were (rightfully) incredibly proud of their city, history and culture -- one of my new friends even told me “I’d never sell my soul and move to Moscow.” I still prefer Moscow.

I loved Moscow, but am also insanely loyal to St. Petersburg. A few of my friends during our time in Moscow mentioned maybe preferring it over St. P and it felt like blasphemy. But maybe that just goes to show you can fall insanely in love with either city you end up in. With an amazing place like Russia, it’s hard to imagine you could choose wrong.

But still, St. Petersburg forever.

And yeah, sure, Moscow is pretty nice, too. 

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Halfway Point

It’s crazy to say my time in St. Petersburg is already halfway over. Life has definitely taken on more of a routine by now and is plenty busy. There is always something to study or practice or review or write, somewhere to go, someone to talk to. Of course, I still spend some nights completely chill, cooking and hanging out with friends because I’ll go crazy if I don’t, but when I think about it, life is bit frantic right now.

I’ll go ahead and be such a cliche by saying I can’t believe my semester abroad is slipping by so fast. I keep looking at the endless list of everything I still want to do–visit the Golden Ring, day trips to Vyborg and Repino and Yelagin Island, hiking in the Urals–not to mention everything I have to do for class, and the only thing I can think to eliminate from the equation is sleep (although after four hour long lectures every day, I want to do that all the time too.) This fall in St. Petersburg has been the prettiest I’ve ever seen, and I live somewhere where the leaves actually change. I think I’ve mentioned it already, but they call it золотая осень–golden autumn–and it really is golden. But already the temperature has been dropping (30s. I pulled out the parka) and this past weekend in Novgorod we saw the first snow flurries. Winter is on its way and my time here is growing as short as the days.

I think, there’s this idea that with a midway point supposedly comes some kind of higher knowledge, newly attained throughout the time already spent, but personally I am still such a novice at living in Russia. It’s constantly apparent. Today in my favorite cafe, I chuckled quietly at a woman, obviously foreign like myself, obviously knowing limited Russian like myself, who pointed at a pastry and simply said Я хочу–I want. Aw, she doesn’t know Russian, I thought. But when my time came to order, I still stumbled over the words I say almost every day. So obviously even what I think I know I don’t know. I only know what I feel and what I’ve learned about myself via a new environment and the liminal space that comes with that–what I try to share with you here each week.

Короче (what my friend Marina taught me to say in Russian when you basically want to say ‘long story short’), despite almost two months here I can’t pretend I have the answers, any of them. But when I reflect on how I’ve spent the last two months, I’m extremely grateful and satisfied. I hope I can do the next two just as much justice, even as the days grow cold and dark, the work piles high, and I’m constantly tempted to just curl up in my door room for a nap.

Since I’m unable to impart any formal advice, I’ll supplement a list of the things I’ve loved this far (not previously blogged about), which I highly insist on doing. Not just insist, demand:

Go to Pushkin in the fall and see the ground’s of Catherine’s Palace. It’s seriously beautiful. Like I cannot believe a place like that just sits there existing in the world.

Don’t let anyone tell you Novgorod is boring. It’s quiet. Go there and be still. See the oldest functioning church and the people still praying at it after everything the city has been through. Go to the monastery and just look in silence at all the green and white and silver and blue. Walk across the bridge and drink their sweet honey drink (sbiten, сбитень) and listen to a man play Katyusha on the accordion.

Go to the world’s largest mass grave, here in St. Petersburg from WWII and the 900 day siege. See Tanya Savicheva’s notes recording when each of her family members died, until only she, a little girl, was left alone, and the candy and toys left on some of the graves, showing that children are buried there. Sergey, our cultural guide, told us that brides and grooms often come to the memorial on their wedding days to pay homage to such loss on the happiest day of their lives.

Go to Moscow. See the Red Square at night and the view from Sparrow Hills (Vorobyovy Gory, Воробьёвы го́ры). Just walk around a lot at night in general. Go to Tretyakov Gallery and see Serov’s “Girl with Peaches,” Kramskoi’s “Christ in the Desert,” Surikov’s huge “Boyarina Morozova,” and all the Repin. My favorite is “They Did Not Expect Him.”

Not necessarily very Russian, but go to Koreana and get the rice with fried kimchi. It’s my favorite.

Go to the Udelnaya flea market one weekend day and rifle through that half treasure trove, half super cheap open air goodwill. Buy a scarf for 50 rubles (essentially nothing) or some soviet era paraphernalia.

Go to the contemporary art museum Erarta. If you don’t have a phone with data, be prepared to spend awhile looking for it. Walk through the haunting and creepy cool exhibits. See the shrouded 3D model of Da Vinci’s “The Last Supper.”

Grab pyshki (пышки) and coffee. Russian donuts are just better. Also Russian ice cream. And notice how Russians keep eating ice cream even when it’s crazy cold outside.

Take a quick train ride to walk around lake 

Go to the Botanical Gardens some sunny day (before they close the grounds, if you’re there in the fall!).

Go sit in the park by St. Isaac’s where you can watch the sun set behind The Bronze Horseman. Also some night from the top of St. Isaac’s.

Eat all the pierogies and khachapuri (пироги and хачапури). Don’t be scared of street-side stands.

Go out late at night to watch the bridges open.

Go to the Hermitage one Wednesday night to watch the Peacock Clock unfold. Get there early (before 7 I think) if you really want to see it.

Drink coffee early one morning by the Neva.

Go sit at the “beach” outside of Peter and Paul Fortress. While you’re there go see inside the church where Anastasia is supposedly buried.

Check out Russia’s first eternal flame in the Field of Mars. The statue of Mars on the nearby bridge was left up during the siege because the citizens thought it was only right since Mars is the god of war. But when the siege was over the statue remained untouched.

Keep on exploring!

That last one is for me as much as anyone. My biggest regret right now is the amount of time I’ve been spending inside or in comfortable places. There is still so much to discover, but I’m getting complacent. I need to get myself back out and unfolding more of this city I have such limited time in. If only it wasn’t so cold and I wasn’t so busy. I’m still trying to master the balancing act of relaxing, experiencing, and staying on top of my work. But I’m making a new rule for myself here on out for the rest of the time to always be going somewhere new.

If you are coming and have any specific questions, please reach out and I can try to help. But for now these experiences are all I can say I know. I’m excited to say there will be plenty more to come.

View from the top of St. Isaac’s Cathedral

Bridge opening at midnight

Russia’s first eternal flame in the Field of Mars

Beach area outside of Peter Paul Fortress

The Bronze Horseman statue near St. Isaac’s Cathedral

One morning by the Neva

Botanical Garden

At the Erarta Contemporary Art Museum 

Saturday morning at the Udelnaya Flea Market

Inside the Kremlin

Red Square at Night

Sunny day at Pushkin at the grounds outside of Catherine’s Palace

Boatride in Novgorod

Novgorod Monastery 

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Ещё раз, пожалуйста.

So I’m learning to play the balalaika.

It’s just another one of the totally random things I fell into here. I overheard my friend Tiara talking about going so I tagged along. A couple weeks later and we’re going to our teacher Sergey’s house once a week to badly strum while our fingers cry out in pain and he laughs at our terrible Russian. Играем, играем, играем, he yells at us. Play, play, play! He lives with his mother, an adorable Russian woman named Irina, who gives us tea and cookies after every lesson and slippers (тапочки) to make us more comfortable. Sergey himself is an amazing musician who has been playing since he was quite young and could, I’m sure, melt any heart with his balalaika skills. I think I died a little when he played Kalinka and Katyusha for us, strumming rapidly and laughing at our childish delight. He’s a good teacher too, even if sometimes after he has spoken for a long time we have to just look up at him and say, извините, ещё раз? Thankfully, you don’t have to use a lot of words to teach an instrument. Loosen your wrist. Use your second finger here. Put your elbow down. Start again from the beginning. And again, and again, and again.

We got into contact with Sergey through the help of one of our coordinators, Zhenya. One of my favorite things about SRAS, the program I used to come to St. P, is how incredibly helpful they are. Sure, I’m paying them money for the help, but the people working with me constantly go out of their way to get me what I want or need. Not just in terms of getting to Russia, but living here too. Zhenya (and April, as well) is a constant source of help and saving my butt. Whatever you want to explore or access or figure out, no matter how weird, Zhenya is always there to lend a hand. It’s such an awesome service and definitely a perk of coming with a program.

Probably now after having to listen to the same simple tunes plucked over and over again, my neighbors absolutely hate me, but I think it’s worth it. It’s like this: sometimes you are just normal. You’re just existing, a passive human being in the world, without thinking about it and it’s fine, it’s good, it’s whatever. But once a week outside of Kazan Cathedral, with a friend I love, holding a melon-colored balalaika, I wait for the bus. It’s a totally normal bus that goes to a totally normal street, and when it drops us off we walk down the street to a regular apartment where I’ll yell Здравствуйте, Сергей! into the intercom so he’ll open the door and we can begin our lesson and drink tea and struggle to understand each other. And it’s just my favorite thing. So always in this moment waiting for the bus, I am suddenly so aware of and grateful for my existence. I get to live this insanely cool life containing all these elements I’m obsessed with and it’s content and peaceful and exciting all at the same time. I’m not the kind of person to be like wow life is such a gift the world is so beautiful let’s all just be happy because, in reality, life is hard and confusing and tiresome. But in these moments, even if I’m stressed or sad, the pure happiness of where I am and what I’m doing outweighs everything. Sometimes I’m standing in heartbroken awe at the world’s largest mass grave. Sometimes I’m eating an apple pastry on the way to my balalaika lesson.

Either way, I’m very much in love right now.

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

The Scenic Route

At one point walking through the lush parks of Kamenny Island, only one metro stop from central St. Pete, my friend who agreed to tag along that day turns to me and says, “Wait, so where are we going?” Of course, I laugh in her face. We had already been walking for maybe thirty minutes already and now she finally asks where we’re going. We’re here, I told her. We’ve been here.

Like most places in St. Petersburg or the surrounding area, I headed to Kamenny Island with little to no plan. I knew how to get there on the metro and then it was a 10 to 15 minute walk in some direction across the bridge. I’m not kidding when I tell you I wasn’t sure what exact direction and I don’t have data to use my phone without wifi. But I knew had to get home if things didn’t work out and I didn’t have plans for the day so I went for it. Alex, my friend who came along, is the best kind of exploration partner because it took her 30 minutes to even consider maybe she should know where we’re going. And even then when I told her I didn’t really know, didn’t have any specific plan in mind, she shrugged her shoulders and kept on with me. And because of that we had a great day in St. Petersburg’s золотая осень (golden autumn). Neither of us were stressed about where we would go, getting any certain place or seeing any certain thing, being somewhere at a certain time. We just walked around a beautiful place and continuously encountered cool things, like the universe was rewarding us for chilling out and letting the environment wash over us.

I think the area is like a suburb for St. Petersburg’s fairly wealthy. The streets are lined with big beautiful houses hidden behind gates atop with cameras, a new building being erected on every block. A large river cuts through the area you can walk along through parks covered in trees. We found a big beautiful building I still don’t know what is, but hey it was cool to look at. At one point on the exploration, Alex and I both started running because she spotted swans. We met two cats that let us pet them to our hearts’ content. One place we found you could walk down wide steps to sit right at the water’s edge like the world somehow ended there. Only one building we found was what the internet had shown me ‘cause some things the internet just can’t tell you about. You have to go and see.

The list of places I want to see in the St. Petersburg area before my time is up here is quite long and information can be hard to find, so I think I’ll continue to mostly show up places and see how it goes. Certainly there are some pitfalls. One day I spent about an hour and a half trying to find the contemporary art museum Erarta because I hadn’t written myself good enough directions. It’s kind of why I prefer to go places by myself--there’s no pressure to get where you’re going and no judgement when sometimes you can’t figure it out (although that day with Alex was like that too). Eventually I found that museum too and it was worth the walk. That’s a great thing about being here, you can rarely be upset about getting lost. Or if you are, it’s a waste of time. Wherever you’re walking, it’s always the scenic route. Hopefully eventually you find where you’re going, but if not the process was well worth it. The days spent in Russia where I’ve just gotten up and gone somewhere have been my favorite by far. They are so peaceful and content. There is nothing to do but think and appreciate and realize I’m presently living out an amazing period of my life. I hope it’s a feeling I’ll be able to carry back with me when I come home.

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Stuck Like a Banya’s Leaf

В ба́не помы́лся — за́ново роди́лся. Washing up in the banya is like being born again.

Over cakes and Russian candy, our cultural guide here in St. Petersburg told us that Russians live so long thanks to two things: banyas and vodka. Sergey takes care of his 96-year-old mother these days and said she still has a shot of vodka every day with her lunch, and maybe it’s thanks to that she’s made it so far. As for the banya, we got a first hand experience.

For the sake of explanation, people say a banya is like a sauna, but it doesn’t do them justice. Really a sauna is like a knock-off banya (баня), stripped of all the cultural significance present here in Russia. People set up business transactions in banyas. In villages, it is tradition to go to the banya every Saturday to cleanse yourself before church the next morning. You can pay to go to a banya like you would a spa, but some villages have communal ones and some people like Sergey, who calls himself an addict, have their own just in the backyard.

Picture a medium sized lodge with three rooms and a small enclosed pool outside of it. Sergey “prepared” the banya (also some delicious food) and then took us inside. The first room you enter is the lounge area (I can’t remember its actual name). There are couches and a table for relaxing before and between banya sessions. Here the genders split up in order to undress. Yes, undress. While we covered up with towels in the main area with everyone together, banyas are meant to be experienced naked. Also, it gets so hot you really just don’t have any other choice. There’s a specific cap you keep on your head to protect your hair and head from the extreme heat. When we were ready, Sergey walked each group through the full experience.

Moving forward from the lounge area, you enter the pre-banya room (предбанник). It starts to get a little warmer here. This area is where you can rinse off between banya sessions or clean yourself up after you’re all down. It has a drain and is built so water can be poured on the floor without damage.

Finally we entered the actual banya. Technically, the steam room is called the parnaya (парная) and the whole structure is the banya. It was 100 degrees celsius. Yeah, that’s boiling point. At all times in the banya this room was between 90 and 100 degrees celsius. And let me tell you, you could feel the boiling. You have never been close to this hot. The skin around my mouth and nose tingled and eventually my whole body was basically made of sweat. It was incredible. Maybe it’s weird to say, but there’s something so encapsulating about being surrounded by slightly suffocating heat that I really enjoy, at least for a short while. I think we only ever lasted about fifteen minutes each time. It’s not healthy to stay in too long without breaks in between.

Sergey showed us how to pour scented oil on the coals in order to keep the room hot and add a pleasant smell of mint or jasmine. Then he left us to undress and relax. Just four girls who have known each other for about a month relaxing naked at 100 degrees celsius. You can’t argue against an experience like that. Now whenever one of my friends acts like something is awkward, I just say, well I slapped you with twigs while we were both naked. I think the whole boundaries thing went out the window then.

But that’s only a joke. In my opinion, being naked around other people, especially your own gender, shouldn’t be awkward. It’s natural. And when we were all in the banya together that’s how it felt--natural and bonding. The saying goes, “В бане, все равны.” In the banya, everyone is equal. Naked and sweating our eyes out, but close and equal with a shared experience none of us will ever forget, I’m sure.

So I mentioned the twigs, the venik (веник). This is just another layer to the whole process. Each group went into the banya three times. After the first two times, you would run quickly outside (don’t forget your slippers!) and force yourself into an ice cold pool. It was obviously shocking. I screamed both times and immediately got out. But then your skin feels so good. It was during our third go-round that Sergey introduced the venik, a bundle of twigs and leaves that are used for massage while in the banya, and showed us how to use them. When you’re ready to massage your giggling friend laying face down on the bench, you pull the venik from the pail of water it’s been soaking in and shake it off. You hit the walls with it a couple of times to test something I still don’t really understand. And then you start massaging your friend by whacking them with the bundle. It’s really not painful. I don’t know if I would describe it as 100% good-feeling, but it wasn’t bad. Just cool and fun, really. When Sergey showed us how he sang songs from the revolution to the rhythm of his whacking and I think it’s probably the most authentic I’ve felt thus far. As for our own whacking, we definitely weren’t doing it totally right. Now that I know how it goes, I’m hoping to go to a public banya soon in the city and pay someone to show me a real Russian venik massage.

At the end of all this, you can’t help but feel helplessly relaxed. In between each session we sat and ate the delicious steak and potatoes Sergey prepared for us, drank mors and kvas. They grow so many apples in the area people throw them out on the side of the road, and they were the best apples I think I’ve ever had. Sometimes we went and stood outside the structure for awhile in the cold in nothing but our towels, steam rising off of our bodies. But eventually it was over. We showered off and went back inside Sergey’s home.

The hospitality offered to us throughout this day was unbelievable. I can’t imagine much reward Sergey and his wife get from having ten mainly young and obnoxious Americans over for the day, but they were constantly pleasant, generous, and kind. His wife made us borsch, served us tea, smiled and laughed at our clumsy Russian. Sergey was patient with every explanation and sang Russian karaoke for us at the end of the day before walking us back to our bus stop. He said we can come back when it snows and try everything again.

I can’t offer you Sergey and his lovely home and town, but if you come to St. Petersburg and really want to experience Russian culture, get yourself to a banya. Embrace your birthday suit, embrace the heat, embrace the strange whacking and the entire experience. С лёгком парам!

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

I Made Myself Hungry Writing This

Соловья баснями не кормят.

You can’t feed a nightingale on fables.

(Fine words do not make full stomachs.)

It’s time to talk about something super important…

Food. 

This might be a bit premature. I am still constantly discovering new restaurants--just getting started on my food journey here. But at the end of the semester I’ll post a comprehensive list of all the restaurants I recommend. 

This post might not be super interesting for those not planning on any travel to SPB, but I figured I’d try and give some helpful information to those who are.

I’ll break it down for ya.

Stolovayas

Stolovayas (столовая) are your #1 food best friend in Russia. The word stolovaya can translate to dining room (more like, canteen in this situation), and that’s what these restaurants are kind of like. You’ve walked into someone’s house and they have a big line of food they’ve prepared for you to choose from. Each stolovaya is different every day with so many options. Main dishes, sides, salads, soups, coffee, pies, desserts, etc. And it’s all crazy cheap. I went to one earlier this week where I got fish, rice, a pastry, a small salad, and coffee all for 350 rubles (about seven dollars). I also like them because they’re fast. You pay when you get your food so there’s no waiting on the check. 

Grocery Shopping

Grocery shopping was a little daunting for me at first. It’s overwhelming to be worried about speaking another language while simultaneously trying to figure out what everything is and how it works. But shopping is actually pretty easy once you get acclimated. There are a couple of 24-hour grocery stores by campus. Most students either go to Dixie (дикси) or the bigger one, Perekrestok (перекресток). The Dixie seems to have better prices on a lot of things, but Perekrestok has more variety and a more typical, comfortable set-up, comparable to American grocery stores. You have to pay for grocery bags here, so it’s better just to bring your own each time or buy a reusable one there. The only thing that can maybe trip you up is that in bigger grocery stores you have to weigh your own produce. Just put your produce on the scale, type the number that was near it into the machine, and it will print out your barcode to stick on the bag. So far my grocery staples here have been lots of fruit, eggs, bread, peanut butter, and brie. (Healthy, I know right?). But lots of the other students can do wonders with some rice and vegetables.

It’s a metro stop away, but I highly suggest taking trips to what we call the “Russian Costco”--Ashan (ашан). It’s just a huge store, like a walmart, where you can get school supplies, clothes, toiletries, and food for a good price. The only hassle is trekking back with all your goods on the crowded metro. (Eggs are less fragile than I expected, thankfully.)

The best place for buying produce it seems is Sennoy Rinock (Сенной Рынок). It’s a market outside one of the malls on Sadovaya. There’s an inside section with lots of different foods, but the outside section is crazy full of produce stands where you can get a ton of fresh fruits and veggies for pretty cheap. That is, if you can handle being called at from every other stand by the men selling. But just stay confident, ignore the calls, and you can get some great stuff for a good deal. I think our last time there we got two onions and three carrots for like 80 rubles (less than two dollars).  

Russian Fast Food

Russian fast food is on another level. At first when someone suggested we go to Teremok (the main fast food place here), it felt wrong, but fast food does not have the same connotation here. Teremok has delicious pelmeni and a dozen kinds of blinis they make right before you. You can get lots of traditional Russian foods there for fast and cheap. Maybe not at the same level as your babushka’s, but still good. 

Food From Other Cultures

Being in St. P is a great opportunity to try food from cultures you rarely have a chance to experience in the states. Maybe you lost Mexican food (RIP. I miss you, queso.), but all of the sudden there’s cuisines you never even thought about. And oh my god, Georgian food has so much cheese. Picture: bread filled with cheese and an egg on top. So make sure to try all you can while you’ve got the chance. So far I’ve only had Georgian and Armenian--both very good--but hoping to check out much more before I’m back in the states.

Comfort Food

Being in a new place, you need small comforts, and those are available too. I personally am obsessed with sushi so it’s been awesome to have lots of access to that here. (The chain sushi restaurant Evrazy may not be the best, but it is literally everywhere.) There are a couple of great burger places near the university too, Wave Burger and City Grill, where they also speak English very well if you need even more of a comfort. And pizza is definitely available, as well. 

Vegan, Vegetarian Options

I travel with a couple of friends who are vegans and vegetarians, so if you are as well and worried about surviving in St. P with that lifestyle, it’s definitely doable. Already, we have found a couple of super yummy vegan/vegetarian restaurants. Jiva Burgers is near the university and has great vegan burgers. Wave Burgers also has a vegan option. And there are a couple of others I’ve forgotten the names of, but they’ll come through in the big final list.

While we’re on the subject of food, let me suggest familiarizing yourself with restaurant Russian vocabulary soon as you can. People tell you in SPB it’s easy to get around because everyone speaks English, but that’s only somewhat true. Everyone speaks a little English, but you’ll be much more comfortable (and practicing your Russian!) if you can order, respond, and ask for the check in a restaurant. Just little phrases like, “мне, пожалуйста…” (for me please) and “кофе с собой” (coffee to go) will go a long way. And don’t sweat it when the waiter laughs at you for saying “a shot, please” instead of asking for the bill. 

That’s all I’ve got for now. What does it say about me that the post about food might be my longest yet? 

Other Basic Words/Phrases I Find Helpful To Know in a Restaurant/Grocery Store:

Здесь (Here, as in instead of to go.)

С молоком (with milk)

Пакет нужен? (Do you need a bag? They’ll always ask you this at grocery stores.)

Счёт, пожалуйста (how to ask for the bill. Really emphasize the shhhhhyooooo at the beginning to make it sound less like shot.)

Напиток? (They’ll ask you this if you didn’t order a drink. Basically asking if you want a drink with your meal.)

Карточка или наличные? (Card or cash?)

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Translating Russian and Translating Myself

Russian Proverb: Как аукнется, так и откликнется.

As you shout out, so you hear back.

If it hasn’t been obvious from my previous posts, I have a fair amount of anxiety. I mean I think most people do, especially when confronted with a totally new environment. But if you think your anxiety issues mean you can’t study abroad, you’re wrong.

I’m not saying I don’t have anxiety here. So far I’ve had more than ever, but it lessens back to my normal amount every day. Even more than that, I’m learning how to better manage it all in order to fully enjoy my time here. It’s an unexpected souvenir I’m looking forward to bringing home.

Everything about being in Russia teaches this lesson. I’ve been here for three weeks and the class schedule is still not complete, and if you ask when it will be, people kind of shrug their shoulders. I’m not saying it to complain. Right before I came someone told me that things here can feel disorganized, but it’s just a totally different way of doing things compared to our American system where you sign up for classes knowing exactly when they will be and how things will work out. Here you just gotta trust that things will work out and know people will help you figure it out if they don’t. Relax and take advantage of what’s in front of you now.

Taking advantage is a huge thing to me here. I am such a planner and I don’t dislike that about myself, but it’s definitely something I have to ease up on. I can plan everything--this museum on this day, relaxing in the park on this day--but inevitably my friends are gonna pop up and say, oh today we’re gonna go check out this really cool restaurant, wanna come? And the answer is yes. But at first there’s always a little resentment about having to change my plans. I get my mind set and have a hard time readjusting. A couple of days ago we were supposed to go get dinner, but then my friends remembered they had agreed to eat with someone cooking in the dorms. I didn’t know the girl, hadn’t really been invited, and didn’t want to go. But I told myself to go with the flow and it was the best. Dinner was delicious. The girls I met were so nice and fun, and we’re friends now. All around, it was a great night I would have missed out on if I kept as my totally type-A self.

This is also an important thing to remember when traveling with a big group, which here is almost always. Whatever you’re going to do, probably at least five other people are going to want to do it. In the end this can be great for getting to know more people, but it’s also usually stressful because everyone wants to do something different. Everyone takes forever to get together and get going. People get annoyed with others who are screwing with their plans. But getting anxious doesn’t work and it doesn’t help. You just gotta take a deep breath and follow the group consensus. If things get rocky, go with the people who wanna do what you wanna do. Don’t try to control people or you’ll only ruin your own good time. And sometimes I take a day for myself every once in awhile in order to recharge.

This part of my experience is kind of like translating Russian to me. Translating is super hard and a lot of work, but when I slowly unravel what a sentence or paragraph is saying, it’s exciting. I can physically feel small, but positive improvement. Something unclear opens before me and it’s gratifying. I don’t want to dramatize my time here as some stereotypical life changing experience after only three weeks. The anxiety is still present for sure, but I’m learning to manage it better. I think anxiety makes people instinctively want to keep to themselves or stay where they feel safe, but in the end, the only way to lessen it is to do the opposite--get out, talk to people, get comfortable with being uncomfortable. When you do this, usually you’ll end up watching the sunset from a rooftop, trying out balalaika lessons, or just laughing with strangers over dinner. And in that moment that’s all there is.

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

Getting Lost

Russian Proverb: Чем дальше в лес, тем больше двор.

The further into the woods, the more wood there is.

I first arrived in St. Petersburg in the back of a taxi with the stranger who had picked me up from the airport, the driver playing “Final Countdown” on his radio because the stranger--my guide, Masha--had told him she likes “all” music, and I guess even “Final Countdown” falls under that category. We drove in heavy traffic surrounded by large warehouses on dirty streets. And I was scared. I was scared that after years of oohing and awing over Russia and St. Petersburg, I was going to finally get here and realize all my expectations had been wrong. It was just another city, only in a different language.

But then we got to the university campus, and all of the sudden I’m looking straight down the street at this:

It’s called the Church of the Savior on Spilled Blood. It was built as a tribute to medeival Russian architecture. It sits in the same area in which Alexander II was fatally wounded by a group of terrorists, giving it its name. It is beautiful, and it is down the street from where I live, and I get to see it everyday when I go outside.

So finally I let out the breath I had been holding since my arrival. Masha admitted that she was nervous in the taxi because the driver had taken us a strange route she didn’t recognize, instead of the usual beautiful entrance into the city. The street outside our university is a normal, heavily trafficked street, but the next day on our walking tour the guide led us only a few blocks in each direction to discover things like Katy’s Garden (as in Catherine the Great) and Pushkin’s apartment. All the beauty and history and culture I’ve imagined really is right at my fingertips, only sometimes hidden around a corner. Just yesterday I opened up the book Petersburg by Andrei Bely and taking a look at the map on the front page saw the exact place where my dorm stands today (the star), where I sleep each night captured in a key piece of Russian modernist literature.

Like most first impressions, mine were wrong. I was scared to see my cultural mecca as a rather typical looking city. But now I see a constant juxtaposition of historical monuments and day to day grime, which has a beauty of its own. My morning coffee is across from a palace. The shady bazaar cuts through to the famed St. Petersburg ballet school (Vaganova Academy of Russian Ballet). Maybe for those of you who grew up in cities like D.C. this isn’t that exciting, but in upstate South Carolina we don’t casually pass by a statue of the man who led Napoleon’s defeat or the father of an entire country’s literary canon everyday on the way to school. I am constantly reminded of how lucky I am to be here. (Peep me with the Bronze Horseman below, the title character of Pushkin’s famous story.)

I’ve realized in writing this that I was ridiculous to have expected anything else. St. Petersburg is a city of depth in a country with a long history, not a theme park. It, like most things, contains multitudes. It breathes the collective breaths left behind by the famous writers I study and of everyday people living here now. It is real and complex and old and changing. A St. Petersburg just made out of pretty monuments and parks wouldn’t be St. Petersburg at all. From the moment Peter the Great decided to build his city on what was once swampland, an ecosystem perhaps not meant to hold a city, he set it up for a difficult, complex existence--which happens to be a key motif in Bely’s Petersburg (and Pushkin’s “The Bronze Horseman”). Bely suggests that Peter created not just a city, but a ticking time bomb leading up to its explosions throughout history--the floods like refusals of the land, the revolutions of the people. As a guest here today, I cannot speak toward any looming dark clouds that remain, but the city still has its roots twisted in Peter’s original challenge of nature. Not like a flower contained in a pot, an entire brambly and beautiful forest that fought hard to exist here. First impressions won’t cut it. All you can do is get lost deep in it. I’ve only just begun. 

[haley2017-scstudyabroad]

I Have Always Depended upon the Kindness of Strangers

Russian Proverb: Не красна изба углами, а красна пирогами.

A home is beautiful not for its looks but for its pies. 

I grew up being told I am a kind person by my parents, particularly my dad. I remember him often when I was younger saying something like you’re smart, you’re pretty, but most of all you’re kind.

I’m not sure it’s true.

Maybe it was some kind of psychological trick they wanted to work: if you tell a child they’re kind, they will think they are kind, and eventually become that way. A performative statement (thanks SAEL). But maybe it also didn’t work. That is to say, I don’t mind going out of my way for those I care about, but I don’t approach lonely looking people. I don’t care to ask new people about their lives and interests, unless it’s out of obligatory politeness. I can get moody and annoyed with those around me.

So needless to say that was a worry about coming to Russia. You have to actively go about making friends in order to have them, and I can only turn on my friendly face for so long before getting tired of my own facade. As much as I love it here, sometimes I just want to be back at home with my best friend watching America’s Next Top Model, not having to talk unless it’s to complain about how annoying Courtney is and why isn’t she kicked off already.

For all you kindred souls out there looking to study abroad, I have good news. Even if you aren’t kind or friendly, other people are. My first night in Russia I walked through a big group of students hanging out in the kitchen on my floor and didn’t say anything because in my head I don’t know those people, so why would I? But since then every time I’m hanging out somewhere on campus, alone or with a group, anyone who comes by will come up and introduce themselves. Anyone I pass in the dorms will say hi. People you just met will hang out and talk with genuine interest. There is a group on social media of almost 100 people who will openly invite anyone to come anywhere they go. And someone always responding that they’re down. People from so many different countries and backgrounds, and yet everyone is down. Everyone is in the same boat not really knowing anyone, wanting to have fun, wanting to become friends, wanting to make the most of their trip. It creates this amazingly warm and open atmosphere to experience the city in.

I don’t always love people as a collective, but this last week has helped my perspective a little. I guess I just forget sometimes that mostly people aren’t looking for a reason to get mad at you or not like you. Quite the opposite. Everyone is looking to connect. And I don’t just mean the students here all trying to make St. Petersburg their temporary home. The locals are kind as well. I keep waiting for someone to be annoyed or frustrated with me and my unfamiliarity, but every time I stumble through my coffee order in broken Russian, the man or woman behind the counter is patient and helpful. Our Russian instructor, Alexandra, speaks slowly, smiles while she talks.

I would not call myself comfortable here. It’s only been a week. There is a small anxiety always tugging at my insides. Still the nagging concern of being alone and unhappy and trapped for the next four months. But everyday it gets a little less. It’s because my first night here my new friend Alex texted me to come hang out without ever having met me. It’s because so many people have introduced themselves to me I can’t remember all their names, but I still feel pretty sure we could go grab dinner anyway. It makes me think of that line Blanche says in A Streetcar Named Desire: “I have always depended upon the kindness of strangers.” That’s what I’ve been living off of here so far, coffee and the kindness of strangers.

Today it is 53 and rainy outside. Fall has come early to Russia. It makes you want to curl up in your bed and hibernate. But in just an hour or so I will be out and about, facing the cold with others. It seems that in St. Petersburg, Russia, people make their own warmth.