ham-job

[ham-job]

yes but what a shame

what a shame the poor groom’s bride is a horse

Mulligan:

[ham-job]

alexander hoemilton

[ham-job]

My name is Alexander Hoemilton. And there's a million guys I haven't done... but just you wait

a H A H A DEAD

[ham-job]

Hamilton GC (Part One)

A/N: IT’S ANOTHER GROUP CHAT HOLY SHIT

Pairing: Ham Characters X Reader 

AU: texting is all

Warnings: swearing, sexual jokes (lots and lots of those)

{usernames to clarify for all of you}

Y/N: MommyY/N

Alexander Hamilton: DaddyHam

John Laurens: LaurensLovesTurtles

Hercules Mulligan: HorseFucker

Lafayette: FrenchHoe

Eliza: ElizabethSchuyler

Angelica: Angel-ica

Peggy: WifeMaterial

Maria: MariaReynolds

Burr: AaronBurr

George Frederick: KingGeorge

MommyY/N: gUYS

MommyY/N: I MADE A THING

DaddyHam: No one cares

MommyY/N: bit ch

DaddyHam: whore

MommyY/N: cocksucker

Angel-ica: sorry to interrupt this nice conversation

Angel-ica: but hey

LaurensLovesTurtles: omg hi

HorseFucker: ^^^ smh what a basic white bitch

AaronBurr: why am I included in this

MommyY/N: i added you accidentally oops

KingGeorge: i was included?

KingGeorge: i feel special

MommyY/N: don’t get used to it :)

KingGeorge: fuck u

MommyY/N: why don’t you go fuck that blond bitch you cheated on me with :)

HorseFucker:

LaurensLovesTurtles: HOLY S HIT

FrenchHoe: 

                         KingGeorge left the conversation

MommyY/N: he butthurt :(

DaddyHam: what did i miss

LaurensLovesTurtles: where were u?

DaddyHam: had a quickie 

MommyY/N: fucking gross

DaddyHam: send nudes lil mama ;)

AaronBurr: you are all disgusting

MommyY/N: BITCH

MommyY/N: YOU’RE JUST BUTTHURT THAT I ADDED YOU TO THE CONVO ON ACCIDENT SMH

                       AaronBurr left the conversation

HorseFucker: they’re dropping like flies

ElizabethSchuyler: wait what is this?

WifeMaterial: ^^

MommyY/N: read up, my friends

WifeMaterial: kay

WifeMaterial: DAMN B

ElizabethSchuyler: IM

WifeMaterial: and ew alex

DaddyHam: don’t be jealous, asshole

MommyY/N: don’t be a creep, fucker

                          DaddyHam left the conversation

MommyY/N: what a bitch

                        MommyY/N added DaddyHam to the conversation

MommyY/N: this ain’t over

DaddyHam: wanna come over and talk about it ;))

MommyY/N: i will chop your dick off

DaddyHam: i use it daily tho :(

                        MommyY/N left the conversation

                          ElizabethSchuyler left the conversation

                         WifeMaterial left the conversation

                         Angel-ica left the conversation

FrenchHoe:

                             DaddyHam left the conversation

                          LaurensLovesTurtles left the conversation

HorseFucker: LAF LET’S BE GAY

FrenchHoe: IM DOWN

FrenchHoe: ILL BE THERE IN 5

                       HorseFucker left the conversation

                       FrenchHoe left the conversation

MariaReynolds: YO IM HERE

MariaReynolds: guys?

MariaReynolds: welp

                         MariaReynolds left the conversation

[ham-job]

Missed You (Alexander x reader)

A/n- HELLOO! This is my first post, I would appreciate if you read. You don’t have to, but I mean I would appreciate. Thanks :’)

Tw: SMUT (sorta roughish)

It was a cold December night. You were in bed watching your favorite movie when you heard the the door being swung open with a great force.

You were about to grab your closest weapon, which was a remote, but you heard the voice of your husband. “Y/n?!”

Your heart started racing, your husband has been away on a business trip for a week. You leaped from the bed, swinging your bedroom door open to see Alexander’s face.

“Alexander!” Your voice sprouted with excitement. “How was your trip?” You asked as he put his coat on a hook by the door. “It was quite a boring trip, especially without you” he wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his head in the crook of your neck.

You let out a small laugh as a smiled crept across your face. “What did you do while I was away, love?” You could feel Alexander’s breath against your neck while he spoke. It made you want him right at that moment.

“I haven’t done much.” You run your fingers through his hair. He picked his head up “is that so?” His grip tightened. “Yes, I’ve missed you, Alex.” You planted a kiss on his plump lips from the cold.

He returned your kiss without any thought. His hands moved from your waist to your ass. He squeezed it making you jump a bit. You felt him laugh on your lips as you did.

You gaped your mouth just a little to let his tongue enter. As he entered we fought a battle, which he quickly won.

Alexander spoke when we both pulled away for air. “My god, y/n, I’ve missed you so damn much” you hummed in reponse, leading him to your shared bed. “I want you now” he sat on the bed and you sat in between his legs. You wrapped your arms around his neck. “r-right now” Alex mumbled out, you nodded. “Okay” he smiled before feathering kisses down your neck.

You removed the suit top he had on as he removed your pajama shirt. You laid Alex down on the bed, on all four you towered over him. You sucked his skin leaving hickies in places the would go unnoticed. You stopped at his unbuttoned trousers, his hardness was very noticeable. You grinned and unbuttoned then removed his trousers and underwear together.

You teasingly licked his length, he let out a grunt. You kissed it a few times before taking him into your mouth. You expertly took all of him in. He moaned as you bobbed your head. “Yes baby mgh,” after a few more bobs he speaks again “I’m about to cum” he breathes out through moans.

Before he could your lips leave his length. “Y/n” Alex’s voice sounding slightly annoyed, but his face wore a devilish smile. He quickly rearranged our positions, he was now towering over you. Alex swiftly removed my bottoms. His fingers roamed down your belly, bringing a tingling sensation wherever they went.

His fingers found your clit rubbing gently circle. You softly moan, Alex kisses you before going down on you. His tounge magically licked between your folds. You grabbed a handful of his hair. In a spilt second his fingers enter you. He kisses your thigh while ferociously banging you with his fingers.

He bites your thigh softly making you squeal his name for more “A-Alex!” Alex removes his fingers and lick your juices. He grabs your waist propping himself up between your legs. “You ready, babe?” You let out a small yes.

His length slowly enters your body, you gasped at the pleasure. “Alex, I want it hard” You whispered in his ear. A smirk appeared on his beautiful face, which disappeared in seconds. “Oh shit, I forgot the condom.” He was about to get up and leave to get one. “No, it’s fine”

“Really?” He stayed where he was and eyed me. I nodded, he laughed “if you say so,” he slowly began to fuck you. You were beginning to grow impatient so you started moving your hips, riding him. You both let out incoherence sounds as the pace speed up.

“fuck y/n” He mumbled onto your lips as he kissed you. You kissed him back, loud moans started to escape the lips of you both. “Alex, I’m close” You spoke barely getting it out. Alex paced quicken once more. Our skin clapping against each other and moaning was making a joyous harmony.

You climaxed and so did Alex all over your chest. Our hair stuck to our face with sweat, breathing heavy. “Best welcome back ever” Alex said. He and I laughed as we cuddled.