harlanphobic

[harlanphobic]

A good rule of thumb for AI is "would you trust a trained pigeon to do this?"

"We trained a pigeon to recognise cancerous cell clusters and somehow they're really good at it" okay great, that's something that could plausibly be a thing.

"We trained a pigeon to recognise good CV:s and left it in charge of sorting through all our job applications" uh perhaps consider not doing that.

[harlanphobic]

anyone else wish they would get roped into a freaky friday body swap situation just for the hope that the other person will go "oh jesus fuck how do you live like this" and instantly validate your feelings of being Strange and Built Wrong.

[harlanphobic]

[harlanphobic]

still thinking about that r/hypotheticalsituation post where someone was like "what if a potato chip spawned somewhere randomly in the world. and every hour the number of potato chips at that location would double. and the only way to get rid of them for good would be to eat all of the potato chips before they doubled again." and someone calculated that it would only take like, 48 hours of people ignoring a weird pile of potato chips before an absolutely irreconcilable number of potato chips was blanketing a city.

and then people were like "no wait if it spawns randomly in the world, it's highly likely it would be in an ocean" and then people were debating whether there were enough small fish swimming at the surface in the open ocean that would be able to eat a potato chip and thus save humanity from the potato chip apocalypse.

[harlanphobic]

🤗 i dont like this emoji. this is not a hug to me. this is someone doing condescending jazz hands in my general direction when i am in need of affection. not comforting.

🫂 i love this emoji. this is a hug. we are hugging and its nice. and as a special bonus they appear to be my old friends from the msn messenger logo? very comforting.

[harlanphobic]

daily affirmations:

i am kind

i am in control of my emotions

it does not bother me when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

everyone in the house has the right to be in the kitchen

i am kind and in control of my emotions even when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

[harlanphobic]

i will never make a fandom sideblog you will get everything on one blog and you will like it. you will learn to love all my interests even if you followed for just one. my blog #myblog

[harlanphobic]

eleanor shellstrop one of the protagonists of all time honestly. woman who sucks so much who gets put in a situation specifically made to make her worse and instead she gets better. filled with love for other people but replaced it with malice for as long as she could because love got her nothing. went from being selfish for survival to selfless for survival and in the end she lands on being selfless for selflessness's sake. she even has mommy issues. she's even bisexual.

[harlanphobic]

something vindictive but ultimately harmless I do at work is that if you’re at my register and you’re rude to me and you pay with cash I am finding the most disgusting desolate fucked up unspeakable coin I can to give to you. oh you were mean to me? you’re getting the yucky nickel bitch

[harlanphobic]

ok this dni has me sobbing

proshippers are the ONLY thing on the list

this person doesn’t know what they are

[harlanphobic]

"fruit has sugar" warning post reminds me of my coworker who told me to make sure I don't get "addicted to fruit". yeah i'm also addicted to a nice walk on the beach

[harlanphobic]

“you’re going to DELETE a post you AGREED with just cuz you found out ops a terf??”

yeah turns out learning that people having uber bigoted ideologies changes the context of the post buddy

[harlanphobic]

[harlanphobic]

I FORGOT TO POST IT HERE BUT HAPPY SUMMERWEEN

[harlanphobic]

hey its me im calling you about your dna sequencing yeauh the results came in.. yeah you might want to sit down before we get started

[harlanphobic]

i hear a good lyric and start mentally holding up blorbos like im in the home depot paint aisle comparing swatches