harlequeenofcrime-blog

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

“M-Mista J, wait, I can explain--” she’d had to, after all. The Mob weren’t like the cops, they weren’t like anyone. ‘Shoot to kill’, they’d said, and if her Puddin had showed up-- well it just didn’t bear thinking about. She’d had to drop the tip, blow the plan right outta’ the water-- Harley just hadn’t  expected him to find out. “Don’.. Don’t make me go Puddin’, please,” her voice was cracking. “I had'ta do it, for you!”

"Wait. I can explain!"

Betrayal starters

“Get out,”His voice was calm andhe hadn’t even looked at her. Thiswasn’t something he expected. Herbetraying him, he always thoughthe would be the one betraying herin the end. “NOW.”He shouted.

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

.

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

“How d’yah think I do it? Jeeze, you’re wound up tighter than Batsy-- y’go into a shop, y’pick what y’like, then y’leave with it. How’s that so hard ta’understand?”

“How the hell do you go shopping? If we’re going to be doing anything to benefit that damn clown you’ve lost your mind.” 

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

Send One for my Muses Reaction

"I love you."

"I hate you."

"Worst date of my life."

"How do you feel about polyamory?"

"So... I stabbed him."

"I might have killed him."

"Wanna go on a date?"

"Alcohol is not my friend."

"Can I marry whiskey?"

"I'm a drunken one-night stand type of girl."

"Will you marry me?"

"I'd rather marry the cactus."

"Wanna have the sex?"

"I killed my pet rock."

"Call me Satan."

"Why are bar fights frowned upon?"

"Why study when you can drink?"

"I have the power of a thousand unicorns."

"Werewolves are hot."

"I may or may not have binged Teen Wolf."

"I have the mutant ability to watch two weeks worth of episodes in two days."

"Sleep is for those who haven't spiraled into a life of chaos."

"I'm fluent in geek."

"Next person to tell me a cheesy pick up line gets slapped."

"That sweater has more sex appeal than you."

"Punch me."

"Netflix and chill?"

"I'm too adorable to slap."

"Just hit me."

"I never say no to drugs."

"You caught me, I'm a drug dealer."

"I think I married the vodka."

"My girly-ass drink has five times the alcohol than your wheat tea."

"So many fuckboys."

"Are you a serial killer?"

"I've killed more people than I can count."

"Brainwashing is fun."

"All I want is a kitten and vodka."

"Kiss me."

"You have nice skin, I can't wait to try it on."

"Stop yelling at me."

"Why do you have marshmallow flavored vodka?"

"I'm only drunk 99.9999999999999% percent of the time."

"He's only slightly dead."

"Don't judge my music."

"I don't like your pants. Take them off."

"We might have to huddle for warmth."

"Turns out, our parents/family/whatever arranged for us to get married."

"Satanism isn't all that bad."

"I'm a pagan, suck it up and move on."

"Your hand looks heavy. Let me hold it."

"I' trying to flirt."

"I'm kinda drunk."

"____ stole my vodka."

"Call me Batman."

"Be the Batman to my Joker?"

"I'm trying to tell you I want to have a homoerotic relationship with you."

"I will go done with this ship."

"Makeout session?"

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

The person who loves you the most kills you the best.

Cupid doesn’t shoot arrows; he wields a double-edged sword. nikka ursula (n.t)

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

“Y’ever been told that y’know how t’kill a mood? Maybe I could take yah shoppin’! It’ll be fun-- y’know what fun is, right? Just for t’night, in the spirit of Christmas n’all.”

“I guess it died with the child in me.” 

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

“Someone outta’ beat ‘em back in’ta yah then. Dont’cha know it’s Christmas, where’s all the holly-jolly-ho-ho-ho?”

“I had some manners, until they were beaten the fuck out of me.” 

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

“Hey! Didn’ anyone ever teach yah how’ta talk to a lady?”

“Quinn you chose the wrong fucking time to come out.” 

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

                                 I’ll wrap my hands around your neck                                         s o  t i g h t with love, L O V E.

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

It was all Harley could do to keep from taking him there and then, as his cock slid against her stomach, pulsing, hot and heavy, with all the promise of what was to come. She’d do that, of course, but not right now. She liked to surprise him sometimes, or try to at least, in those moments where she took the reins, but there’d be plenty of time for that. Instead she continued to watch him from beneath dark lashes, coquettish smile toying with her lips as she shifted again, putting herself on display for her Puddin’-- this was a show only he got to see.

“I do try, Mista’ J.” Her smile was devilish as she braced her hands behind her, arching her back so her chest was pushed outward, every inch of her begging for what was to come. Glistening trails snaked across her tummy with every rut of his cock against her, but it wasn’t enough. She wanted the Joker inside her, filling her until she was screaming again, and then he would finish his masterpiece on her canvas.

Swallowing heavily, Harley shifted to grim the edge of the counter as she felt the swipe of his length against her clit, suddenly aware of just how over-sensitised her body still was, as unbidden she bucked at the contact. A groan caught in the back of her throat when he pushed inside of her, teasing her, before all his fury, all the chaos was back. She didn’t even managed to scream, the sound died in her lungs as she gripped at his forearms, nails pressing deep into his skin as he pounded into her, leaving her head spinning as her still aching pussy took him time, and time again.

Within seconds Harley’s breath was ragged again, every slow, deep thrust of his cock jolting through her body as she yelped in pleasure: and then he stopped. A smile threatened in the corner of her mouth as her body instinctively arched towards the Joker’s ready for his climax, moaning softly as his come poured into her. With a heavy lidded gaze, she glanced down as she slipped from her still clenching walls, watching as his seed began to trickle down her legs, before she was giggling as he spoke.

“Thank you Daddy.” She was slipping slowly from the countertop, one hand braced against his chest to guide him backwards towards the wall, “Maybe I should show yah my gratitude, huh?” Harley tipped her head to the side, batting her eyelashes a little too obviously, before she gave the Joker a final shove towards the wall, her hands fisting in his hair as she pressed herself against him, standing on tiptoe so his lips would brush against his as she spoke, “I don’t think y’need a princess anymore, maybe y’want your bad girl now, huh Puddin’?”

Keep reading

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

It as an impossible feeling, to be numb and on fire at once. Her skin tingled, her body ached in all the right ways, but Harley’s mind was a dark haze, punctuated by the sudden, blinding blur of release. It lasted longer this time, as she sagged against the Joker, panting until her throat felt raw (or was that from the screaming?). It wasn’t until he moved her that she was even conscious of anything round her, aside from the heat of his body, and the throb between her legs. She didn’t want it to stop she wanted to stay like this, to feel him burred inside her, pushing her to every limit-- but that wasn’t to last.

The noise of irritation wasn’t as loud as before, more a whine than when he had pulled from her clenching walls in the tub, but she missed the feel of him just the same. The counter was almost painfully cold against her burning flesh, but like everything else he’d given her it was a twisted pleasure all the same. Leaning back, she watched him, silent with a half-smile that was filled with unspoken promises as he settled his cock against her tummy. One brow edged upwards slowly, before she glanced down, tongue moistening her lips as she took in the debauched sight that sent another needy ache rattling through her. Oh, her Puddin’ knew just what to do.

Slowly, purposefully slowly, she spread her legs, head tilting back as she flashed him a smile while she still worked on catching her breath, “Y’wanna’-- fill me up, Mista’ J?” Times like these, Harley was daring enough to give back what she got, to play their little games and love every second of it. Teasingly, she cupped her breast, massaging it and plucking on the nipple, never taking her eyes off him all the while, before her hand was sinking lower. It skittered down her stomach, fingers just grazing against his throbbing cock, sticky with her juices, before delving between her own legs. It wasn’t the water that shone between them now, and as her teeth sank provocatively into her bottom lip, she slipped one finger, then another inside herself.

The gasp she gave was supposed to be inviting, before she brought the same two, dripping fingers back to her mouth, slipping one between red lips and sucking obscenely. Then, Harley leaned forward, pressing the other to the Joker’s lips as she spoke, “I want y’ta fill me up Puddin’, right here,” she opened her legs as wide as she could manage, “-then, we can fill everywhere else too. What’cha think, Daddy?”

Keep reading

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

ooc;; Happy Munday guys and dolls! 

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

joker: *getting beaten up by harley quinn*

joker: *hearteyes* wow you look so pretty

harley: what

joker: I SAID YOU LOOK SO SHITTY HARLEY

[harlequeenofcrime-blog]

Focusing had become something of an impossibility. All that was left was sensation, the addictive throb as he pounded inside her, the way he body bucked and spasmed to meet the Joker’s, while Harley clung to his neck and around him for all she was worth. Her fingers were still wound in his hair, nails still digging into the flesh of his neck, as her pale skin flushed with heat and arousal, while sweat ran rivets down he flesh: sparkling on her arms, and glistening in the valley between her breasts as they bounced with every powerful jolt of his hips.

“M-Mista’ J—aw, GOD Puddin’,” she wasn’t quite capable of thanking him, of reciprocating the sentiment in words- she’d been robbed of them long before, with every throb of his cock inside her. Instead she decide to show him, surging forward and forcing their lips to collide with a desperate, hungry need. It was times like this she was glad of the impossible ways her body would contort (or would have been, had she a second to think beyond all that-- ‘fuckfuckfuck it feels so good’), as he tongue swiped over his, and bright red lips stained their faces.

Finally she tilted her head, breaking the kiss as she kept their cheeks pressed together, only managing to register that she could see herself: the way she jolted in his arms, her face smeared blue, pink and red, while her neck and back were a mottled canvas of bites and marks. She was his masterpiece tonight, Harley realised. “H-huh?” She managed to pant out at his next question, heavy lidded gaze just about keeping up with their erratic movements in the reflection as her muscles tensed with the euphoric promise of release against: he was past thinking, past understanding, just desperate to feel him. “S-sure,” she struggled with another breath, and a desperate whimper, “Puddin’. Her face was buried in his neck now, placing hungry kisses and nips anywhere she could reach, “Love.. love goin’ out..”

Harley shuddered as her back arched and body bucked against him again, she was getting so, so close--her toes curled and eyes fell closed, blood sang and her muscles twisted and coiled inside her, gripping don on his throbbing length as though he’d never let go. And then it happened. Her orgasm took her by surprise, suddenly wide eyed with lips parted as she held him close, gaze searching for his before there was nothing but a bright, blissful haze. It was only after the twitching, and the spasming, and the ay her body bent and bowed over his cock, that Harley realised she’d been screaming as well-- ‘Loud enough t’wake the whole city..’

Then, it was over, leaving behind it the heavy buzz of delirious exhaustion. Her lips twisted into a smile as she smeared lazy kisses along his jawline, his lips-- but she knew respite wasn’t forthcoming tonight. After all, her Puddin’ needed to feel as god as she did, and they might even go out on the town.. It would be one hell of a night.

Keep reading