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I finished grading the papers and I have no reason to stall writing fics now but I kinda don't feel motivated when I am free.

I have about 400 papers to grade. I hate this.

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Me watching S3

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June 6, 1897 Rilke and Andreas-Salomé: a love story in letters (1897-1926)

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I wonder how it feels like to be Omar Rudberg and watch the whole world burn after that picture...

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Love to see the bookmark count drop on my fics 🥲

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Sylvia Plath, aged 27, from "The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath" (dated November 7, 1959)

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It has been years since Skam but there hasn't been a single time when I didn't think about them if it is 21.21.

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YOUNG ROYALS | 1.02

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I have about 400 papers to grade. I hate this.

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Claudia Rankine, from her book titled Don't Let Me Be Lonely: An American Lyric

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Sylvia Plath, aged 29, after discovering her husband's affair, in a letter to Ruth Tiffany Barnhouse Beuscher, her former psychiatrist (dated Friday, 20 July 1962)

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All you do is whine

untrue i also suffer, rot, wail, wallow, haunt, mourn and rage

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— arealliveghost

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Older

"What happened?" Simon comes to find Wille on the corner of the house, sitting alone and crying, away from the party.

"Just realized something." Wille sniffles. "I am now older than Erik ever was."

"Oh," Simon sits down next to him, holding him, wrapping his arms around his body, and Wille clings on to him like a lifelin. "How are you feeling?"

"Sad, disappointed, and---angry." Wille says between sobs, wiping away his eyes fervently. "I can't help but think if he would—"

"He would what?"

"If he would accept me. As who I am. As what I choose to be. And now I am definitely away from the Crown and all those stupid responsibilities. Would he even like me?"

"Of course he would. You were his little brother."

"Well, not anymore," he sobs harder, and Simon can't do anything except hold him tighter.

"People say stupid shit all the time. They do stupid shit all the time. He would love you no matter what. Just because he fucked up when he was younger can't define your whole relationship with him. He would love you."

"You think so?"

"Yeah, I know so. Didn't you tell me the conversation you had when you talked about me? Or sorry, when you talked about a crush?" He laughs and wille smiles too. "And he was happy for you. Maybe he already knew, and that's why he didn't ask for a girl's name at all. Maybe that was how he was trying to be supportive. Until you were ready."

"I don't know, maybe." Wille's cries subside, and he looks calmer and less sad.

"Would you like to go back to your birthday party or want to stay here for while?"

"Stay." he whispers. "Only for a little while, then we can go back."

"Okay. I will stay with you until then."

"Thank you, Simon." Simon kisses him on his temple instead. He doesn't know how Erik would have reacted if he were alive, but that is the only thing they can both hold on to for Wille now because he is not coming back.

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Just remembering things again. I feel a little nostalgic. It was either the third or fourth of July when I started it, and I finished the show in two days, I think. I published the fic on the 17th. That is crazy.

And currently writing fic number 32. And more to come.

I remember watching S1 trailer before the show aired and I was actually curious about it but I didn't actually pay attention to the airing date or anything. Then this was the first scene I saw on Twitter or Tumblr, I don't remember. And I knew it. I knew I was going to like this show, but I never imagined it would be to this extent.

And I was like yeah, this looks cute, let me watch the first episode. I was already meaning to have a look at it and then I did.

And I went to my parents' house in the countryside for the summer and started my first fic on my phone's notes app and posted it with a shitty internet connection because I couldn't stop thinking about it for days.

And the rest is history.