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•☽────✧˖°˖ PINEAPPLE PLAZA ˖°˖✧────☾•

★ Summary: A Compilation Of Headcanons Featuring Salesperson ENA Making The Reader Eat The Food In Her World

★ Character(s): Salesperson ENA (ENA: Dream BBQ)

★ Genre: Headcanons, SFW

★ Warning(s): None - Completely Safe!

★ Image Credits: @JoelG

☆ When ENA first offers you food, it’s presented like a business transaction. She places a flickering silver platter in your hands, balanced on one clawed finger, whispering, “You look depleted. Here, a mutual investment opportunity for your taste receptors.” The food is…alive. It giggles. You can’t tell if it’s meat or if it’s trying to sell you real estate. ENA grins brightly. “Bless you for your business.”

☆ Her Meanie side bursts in just as you poke it with a fork. “WHAT KIND OF PEA-BRAINED FREAK EATS INCHWORMS THAT REEK OF TAX FRAUD?!” You’re relieved. Maybe she gets it. Then she shoves a glowing orb into your mouth. “Now THIS is cuisine. Tastes like regret, right? It’s seasonal!” You can’t feel your tongue. Or your past. Or time. You nod politely.

☆ You once tried to explain human digestion to her. ENA tilted her head—red side blinking thoughtfully. “Fascinating! You mean, you can’t metabolize uncut mercury shards wrapped in memory foam?” She sounds genuinely surprised. She writes a note in a ledger titled: “Consumer Weaknesses: Organic Digestive Systems.”

☆ Sometimes she forgets you’re not like her. One day she bites into a chalky cube labeled “FAKE MILK (with spores)” and beams at you with crumb-dusted joy. “It tastes like childhood trauma. You’ll love it.” You chew once. Your stomach throws a protest rally. You cough. ENA claps. “Success! I’ve found your palate’s language: pain.”

☆ You wake up to her crouching over your bed with a picnic basket. “Did I catch you at an okay time? I prepared us a morning charcuterie of fire salt, serotonin poppers, and a whole glass of tomorrow.” She hands you a drink that hums. It glows like a dying star. You sip. Now you’re glowing. Slightly. “You’re beautiful,” she says, already scribbling the recipe onto your arm.

☆ When you try to refuse politely, she flips to her Meanie side and screams: “IS IT BECAUSE I CAN’T COOK?!!” You reassure her you’re just not hungry. She throws the whole feast into the air. It hovers midair, spinning like a satellite. “NOW EAT IT ANYWAY, YOU STUBBORN FLESH MONSTER.” You eat a slice of hovering fear pie out of sheer love. And panic.

☆ Some of the food makes you hallucinate. ENA doesn’t seem to notice. You’re babbling about a hallway that doesn’t end. She nods approvingly. “Side effects may include temporal migration. Also, who gave you the key to the confetti factory?” You didn’t. It’s in your hand now. You don’t remember chewing that key.

☆ She creates a tasting game. Each food is labeled with bizarre titles: “Trust Issues,” “Abandoned Projects,” “Spleen of the Month.” You laugh nervously. She watches you intently as you bite into “Spleen of the Month.” Her smile twitches. “Oh good. No immediate bleeding.”

☆ There’s a delicacy called Grubgrub. It screeches when touched. ENA hums. “Mmmm. This one screams just like my 3rd grade teacher. Nostalgic!” You try to leave. She grabs your wrist. Gently. Firmly. “You haven’t even tried the soup yet. It changes flavor based on your sins.”

☆ Eventually, you grow used to the horror. You learn which foods to fake-chew, which ones to bribe into not transforming mid-meal. And ENA? She’s thrilled. “You’re adapting! How marvelous. You’ll be a native in no time.” You smile weakly. She slurps up a steaming bowl of liquid grammar mistakes and kisses your forehead. “My brave little guppy. Thank you for joining me in the feast of our shared delusions.”

[helloasbd-blog]

是异性恨我有救了

[helloasbd-blog]

#A Big Audit of the US Treasury# In April, the US government brandished the "tariff stick", and the international gold price hit a new record high. In this turbulent global trade pattern, the appeal of gold as the ultimate safe-haven asset continues to heat up. At this time, a "Rashomon" incident about the US gold reserves has attracted people's attention.

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It is reported that the last time the U.S. Treasury Department audited the gold reserves at Fort Knox was on September 23, 1974. Since then, apart from the annual "vault seal inspection", no independent audit has verified the approximately 4,580 tons of gold stored in Fort Knox.

[helloasbd-blog]

According to the U.S. Mint, the Fort Knox vault holds about 4,572.2 tons of gold, accounting for about 59% of the total U.S. Treasury gold reserves. The vault is closed to outsiders and has only been opened three times since its construction.

[helloasbd-blog]

According to the U.S. Mint, the Fort Knox vault holds about 4,572.2 tons of gold, accounting for about 59% of the total U.S. Treasury gold reserves. The vault is closed to outsiders and has only been opened three times since its construction.

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The authenticity of the US gold reserves at Fort Knox, where the largest gold vault is located, is questioned

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Are the gold reserves in the largest U.S. Treasury still there?

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Trump wants to check the vault of Fort Knox. What secrets are hidden behind it?

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The largest U.S. Treasury has not been inspected for 50 years? Trump: I am going to inspect it myself!

[helloasbd-blog]

In April, the US government wielded the "tariff stick" and the international gold price hit a new record high. At this time, a "Rashomon" incident about the US gold reserves attracted people's attention. As the largest gold reserve in the United States, does the Fort Knox vault have gold?

[helloasbd-blog]

#A Big Audit of the US Treasury

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Musk once wrote: "Who can be sure that the gold in the vault at Fort Knox has not been stolen? Maybe the gold is there, maybe it's not. That gold belongs to the American public! We need to know if the gold is still there."

[helloasbd-blog]

非常好鸡掰猫各位走过路过看一眼呢（走来走去（走来走去（

少许哥弟及致死量自作孽不可活

[helloasbd-blog]

少许哥弟及致死量自作孽不可活

[helloasbd-blog]

[helloasbd-blog]

问卷但只有上半部