herculiess

[herculiess]

As a little girl I passionately explored the endless universe of music. At the age of seven was when my young and unestablished mind collided with Her Majesty, The Queen. And, boy, was it awesome!

The New Year’s celebration was coming to an end at my grandmothers house. All the guests have already left leavening my gran and me to fetch the table. Grandfather, also know as the Grand Chief of our family, was in the kitchen.

I knew that grannie were tired, a whole day in the privet clinic with not enough personnel, or was it the year when my mother had an open break of her wrist and grandmother had to visit her in the countryside every day for a few month because mom could sterilize her wound by her self. My point is, gran was always shit ass tired after any day of her life and now she had a hyperactive kid on her shoulders to raise. That must’ve been hard times for her.

She looked at the dirty plates with her all forgiving smile and told me we should bring some music to our party. I was delighted!

As a chubby child leaving afar from her school in a yet to be fully build neighborhood I didn’t have many friends, yet alone ones I could’ve had a party or a sleep over with. So she was my best and only friend in this whole world.

She brought computer back to life after an unspeakable amount of cartoons watched on it (Holiday’s special!), сinjected the speakers to it and then He came into my world rocking like a hurricane.

I can’t describe the feeling I had the moment the chorus started, I couldn’t even understand a word in English back then. But something in my chest stiffened. And I jumped on the chair pretending to be a rockstar lighting up the stage, shaking my head so furiously I nearly fainted before I finally fell on the floor.

Grannie was smiling, collecting those Champaign glasses and forks and oily plates with leftovers. I guess somewhere in that dream of mine where I absolutely lost the sense of time, dancing and hopping to the song, she called Granddad. I saw him staring at this crazy circus with laughing eyes, as if he new that day that in time I will be as mad as he was about rock n’ roll… and maybe even more.

I was just a child what chance could I have against the best bend of all times?

From that day has passed eight years until I came back to where I truly and wholly belonged, to where the music had it’s meaning again and not just beautiful faces and high paid mv’s.

So I cut my bangs and did my makeup, got up and went to school at the unholy time of the morning listening to Death on Two Legs, and then I’m In Love With My Car , and after that the whole bloody album. Again and again for months…

As delighted as I was I soon understood that in this world liking the music that no other kid in your school finds interesting or entertaining at least and what’s more rumbling about this music all the time makes you an outcast. The label I hoped to get finally rid of that year.

Why couldn’t I just listen to Stray Kids or other fancy thing. Or maybe be born sometime earlier? Approximately thirty years previous to my actual birth date. It was the road I chose and I couldn’t fully understand that thing for the next few years. Being and moody teenager, don’t miss those times!

Well, maybe a little. Do you?

Queen became a part of my life, the best one, and alike for the billions of people before their music helped me to deal with my demons, to concur the evil one finds inside himself sooner or later, to accept who I am.

And during that period I started idolizing Freddy Mercury. I felt connected to him after watching the Bohemian Rhapsody movie because we are all great liars mostly to our own selves. And finding out where the path of destruction can take you if you’re not careful enough is downright scary. Sometimes I’m afraid I would die poor and alone, though I know it must sound cynical. Not sorry for that part.

So, I try to stay close to my real family. If Freddy has taught us one great lesson is that you have to be close to those who truly care about us. And you know that there will be fights, plenty of them, but you know that when the days grow colder, and you feel heartbroken they will be by your side, no matter what, no meter when. Sometimes we have to listen to even the most unwanted comments and pushes they make because the love us and want what’s best for us. Sometimes we disagree… and it’s totally fine!

What I’m trying to say here, is that Queen were the ones who taught me the lesson that, as cliché as it sounds, saved my life. It’s been a long way. So, thank everybody… This is the reason I want to believe in eternal life for the greatest teacher I’ve ever had.