herdeviousins

[herdeviousins]

as time went by, i started to notice the distance. Our conversations become simpler and the content, uneventful. we still joked around sometimes, until we both faded out from each other's life. we didn't break up. nor we did say goodbye. no tears were shed. no arguments either. we didn't break up as other would. it was as if our relationship never started nor truly ended.

— I'm the secret in your heart

[herdeviousins]

Doctor: Let's try... using what we call a compliment diary.

Daeun: Sorry, what kind of diary?

Doctor: You just need to compliment yourself in it. It can be for the most trivial things.

[Daeun writing...]

Today, I am complimenting myself for learning how to say no and for asserting myself.

I also complimented myself for organizing my shoes and for not spilling any food or drink on my clothes during our mealtimes.

And I complimented myself, for complimenting myself too.

[herdeviousins]

She takes care of others more than she does herself. And she grieves for others more than she does her own losses. Whatever the challenge is, she embraces all the good, somehow swallowing what’s bad. And when something outside her understanding happens, she always criticizes herself.

Dr. Dong

[herdeviousins]

When someone likes me, I get so anxious. I wonder how they could, cause I’m worthless. I start doubting who I am or if I deserve love. Do you know why? Cause I’ve never felt affection. Being appreciated is such a foreign concept that I’m not even able to love someone else back.

– Nurse Min Deul Re

[herdeviousins]

Dealing with death isn’t something you can just get used to. It’s sad every single time. We all just pretend it doesn’t affect us. That’s all.

– Dr. Hwang Yeo Hwan

[herdeviousins]

A big jump takes a lot of groundwork. Your stay here was like crouching to get ready to go higher than ever.

Nurse Jung Da Eun

[herdeviousins]

You’ve already overcome battles that were challenging. I have faith you’ll conquer this one, too.

Nurse Jung Da Eun

[herdeviousins]

There’s no guarantee you’ll pass, even if you try your best. But it’s hard to quit when you’ve tried so long. It’s like passing must be within your reach somehow. And then you just get trapped in that cycle. Like, who cares about how long or hard you worked? It’s only if you pass the test that anyone cares, right? And so people on the outside will keep on seeing you as a loser who didn’t put in the work.

Kim Seo Wan

[herdeviousins]

Even if it’s just one day, you have a bit of time, so don’t quit yet. There’s still hope if you try. You can still make it. I know it!

Nurse Jung Da Eun

[herdeviousins]

People tend to affect each other in various ways. Sometimes in sad ways, at times in painful ways, and sometimes in ways that hurt everyone around them. However, at times, the stone we cast to change ourselves can start a ripple that doesn’t stop at us but goes on to reach those around us as well.

– Nurse Jung Da Eun

[herdeviousins]

Happiness isn’t complicated.

Being free to do what you like, that’s happiness.

– Song Yuchan

[herdeviousins]

Seok Ji-Won: What was it like seeing me again after 18 years?

Yun Ji Won: What about you?

Seok Ji-Won: I get annoyed when I see you.

Yun Ji Won: I see you still resent me.

Seok Ji-Won: Then, did you think I would miss you?

Yun Ji-Won: Seeing you again after 18 years makes me feel like crap. I wish you would stop going on about our meaningless past.

Seok Ji-Won: Meaningless...?

[herdeviousins]

do whatever you want. run away cheerfully if you want. and stay and dive in head first if you want. who cares what other people say?

I'm so cool. that was such a killer line, huh?

well, you know, it's okay for you to do that. to follow your heart. you haven't been able to do that for a while.

[herdeviousins]

Interviewer: What do you believe comes after love? It felt like the title had special meaning to you.

Jungo: For the past five years, I've thought about a lot of things while writing this novel. What do I believe comes after love? I believe we gain an understanding of what love is.

Interviewer: It feels very ironic.

Jungo: Yes, you're right. It's such a sad irony. Only after love do we realise what it truly means. That's why I believe we're always filled with regret. Maybe that's why the deeper our love is, the bigger our regret becomes.

[herdeviousins]

Beni,

Did you get home safely? You've been gone for a month already. But you know what? I'm still stuck on the day that you left. I keep asking myself why I couldn't understand how lonely you were. I regret it so much. I shouldn't have left you alone like that. I shouldn't let you leave like that. I used to think that we were together the whole time, but you were by yourself for so long. I'll put aside the regrets for now. I'm going to take some advice from the poems that you left me. I'm going to start walking down the path I was meant to be following. If I continue down that path, I feel like I might see you at the end of it.

- Yun Oh

[herdeviousins]

When my mom left me as a kid, she asked me a question. "Do you want to live with your dad or do you want to live with me?" It didn't take very long for me to answer. But I guess that wasn't the answer she wanted. I regretted it for so long. I should've just kept my mouth shut when she asked. I realised that what I say doesn't really change anything. Sometimes, in life, it was better just to hold my tongue. Thanks to my mom, I learned a valuable lesson at such a young age.

[herdeviousins]

I was not trying to forget Jungo but the me who loved him.