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Everything About Botanica

So, if it isn’t obvious, I haven’t been keeping up to date with my blog. I guess that I felt I was more focussed on my studio class and how that has affected me. With the Grad show, the works I’m trying to make and the personal developments and reflections I have been doing that have stemmed from deep and heavy conversations from that particular class, I haven’t really been considering this project. A lot has happened this semester, its been crazy and at this point, I just want to finish. 

But I want to talk about everything that has occurred with this project, my personal feelings, the good and the bad and how things have been resolved-- just everything. The previous posts were just details about our work and where different ideas came from, the artists that we have looked out an dhow our idea has taken form. But this post will dive into the nitty gritty. 

The idea of having an interesting and though provoking work in a highly engaged festival really excited me!! I was keen on the idea of creating something that challenged my current practice and help me grow. As well as that, it would be pretty cool to have this festival attached to my CV as I feel that i am lacking in my artistic endeavours currently. Just something to keep me going and allow for me to attain new skills. I was keen to collaborate with out people genuinely. However, I feel that i was drawn such a short stick. 

The first group I had, during the first 3-4 weeks when we ere doing readings was okay I liked the other visual artist and we’ve become good friends now. The other two in my group were dancers and although they were okay, I didn't like their superficialness. I know it’s unfair to say i don’t like something abut a person when we are brought together to collaborate on a work, and have to navigate ourselves to create something together, but I felt that things were so surface level and that there was a clash of personalities. I guess basically, there were comments made that I didn’t like. They were unfair things. It was really petty stuff and I had hoped form there I could be transferred into another group that would be better streamlined. But it just got worse. I really don’t and didn’t like the current group I am in. Environmentalism was my last or second last option and yet this was the group i was put in. I felt that the splitting up was redundant and that there was no consideration at all. I get the encouragement of cross disciplinary connections and ideas however there was a level of unfairness. 

I truly have no idea on how we came to the current idea that we have. I don’t really like the idea that much and I feel that it was born through our divergence of ideas and lack of communication. I really don’t remember the idea ever being discussed until it was pushed to the point it was something we had to settle on. 

I felt that there was no streamlining in the group at all. And there was no willingness to try new things. There were clashes int eh group. There seemed ot be an elitism within my group and I felt that i was on the bottom of it. Why? Maybe because of my degree, maybe its because of our privileges but it was just because of our different ideas. It felt a lot different than that. My parts got cut out, i was ignored for quite a while and because of that, i immediately checked out half way through this project. If I am honest with you, I absolutely hated this project and felt that there was no support whatsoever. i can’t deny that also falls on my lack of reaching out for help, but I don’t want to be reduced to overthinking or making things into something that aren’t. i remember when I had to make time to back to my hometown and telling my mother about my internals tress about the project and how i felt so sick and anxious. I talked through how things were going and she said “Darcy you should tell you project manager, it’s real what you’re feeling, say something!” and i just couldn’t. I felt that I had no support. I felt that what i was feeling wasn’t real or didn’t matter. I felt constantly invalidated. “Oh you’re just making it into something its not. Oaky then. Its fine. it doesn’t matter. 

I dreaded coming to class every week. i didn’t like the way it was managed. One week I had (for lack of better word) a panic attack and didn’t go, just went to the city instead to have some time for myself. I haven’t had one of those kinds of days since high school. I acknowledge that it could’ve been other things and i could’ve said something but  i will not go through finding the courage to say something to then be invalidated. I guess an answer to that is “well this is how collaborative work normally is” and I disagree with that in . the creative field. I can choose who i want to collaborate with and what were going to collaborate on. Its different in a business setting and sure, its something that you just have to deal with but feel that the response is lazy and weak. If there is no balance then there is no positive outcome. 

Whilst I didn’t mind one of my the members, I felt that there was a lack of work ethic. I genuinely think that two members did a really good job on staying on top of things and Im thankful that they picked up in areas I did not. My work ethic slacked too with this class. I was more concerned about my studio class. But as much as I hated it, I at least tried to sort myself out so that the others could manage what they had to as well. The other two members didn’t have  much that they had to do but were quite lazy and left things very last minute. Myself and the first two members didn’t appreciate that as it was a group effort .This is a small gripe, but I will admit that. But it is important to note it as a part of the overall process i guess. 

We tolerated each other. Barely sometimes. There was a lack of communication in our group. I came to a point where I did not care at all and just did what I had to do. Personalities clashed. There were many passive aggressive message sin our group chat. Even in person. There were times where I, or another member, had to become stern to keep us on track with out idea, to try and keep it simple and not overcomplicate our final product. A particular member was adamant on having a dance performance included so we had to work around them. I know nothing about dance, so you know, it was a learning point. What I couldn’t stand was the unwillingness to learn new things, to integrate themselves into something that is out of their comfort zone. That we, as a group, had to make space for her because she couldn’t have a dance showcase. that she tried to leverage her privilege with complaining about minuscule things that have no effect on er life whatsoever but to come across as someone that was struggling. is this a personal dig? yeah, it looks like it is. But it’s so infuriating to be talked down to. 

This sounds like it’s getting personal, doesn’t it? To be completely honest with you, I think it was. That we all knew that we didn't really like each other but we had to make something to pass. There was the collaborative work, but here was the underlining intolerance. 

So how was all this resolved on my end? Well, I just took a step back and did what i needed to do. The ignorance and invalidation irritated me, so i just focussed on my efforts with the work. Did what I could when l could. if there was anything I did enjoy was the feedback that our idea had received during the first and second presentation since it was something that made me consider art again. I didn’t feel like I was making art anymore, it felt like I had to just bite my tongue and hope that the weeks fly by. And that was something I hated, that I didn’t enjoy this as much as I wanted to because it felt more personal. Something was not sitting with me right.

But what have i learned from this? Aside from the personal stuff, there were many things that i had learned, especially about the gardens. I was really interested in hearing about the meticulous management of the gardens, its history, the Indigenous connection to land (wish there was more of an emphasis on this), and even learning about spatial works too. It’s always really exciting daydreaming about making a work to be interacted with by the public in a way that is completely different than white-cube space interaction. I think even working through the technical trials and tribulations and having points that we didn’t think of being brought up was something that i enjoyed too. Much like how in a previous post, an audience member brought up the visual readings of our proposed idea. That was something that always excites me because it’s a point of reconfiguring a smaller aspect to make sure the idea as a whole is strong and clear. The art process taught me a lot in that large projects require a lot planning and fine-tuning so that the work is refined. We didn’t go through many issues with our proposed idea, it was pretty steady and straightforward. We knew to donate the clothes after we used them for our work and repurpose the frames or give them way to be recycled. The idea was straightforward, even with the tweaks and critique that was brought up. It’s hard with clothes since they’re complicated materials however, the research expands our options on keeping with our environmental theme. It was a simple fix, really. It went smoothly with the work, but underneath it didn’t feel so smooth at all. 

I guess personally, I resented this class because of the lack of support. I wasn’t being heard or acknowledged. The collaboration, on the surface, looked fine. But underneath it was all just a tension in the room that we quietly overlooked. At the time I checked out, it just became a waiting game. I can understand that it’s difficult managing a project like this under the constraints that we, as a whole, were going through. Working with other is always an interesting experience but this felt like btichfest that I didn’t want to be a part of. In the end, whilst there were smalls things that i enjoyed, I’m more glad it’s over. 

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Feedback from Final Presentation

Aysia noted the feedback that we had received from the final presentation, so I will talk about it. 

With Courtney’s first point, I had originally agreed with Chantell in that microplastics are primarily released through washing synthetic clothing as the rigorous movement separates them from the clothes. 

https://www.conserve-energy-future.com/smart-easy-ways-to-reuse-wastewater.php 

This article suggests to reuse the waste water from the washing machines for the yard or pavements however, I don’t think it completely negates the spread of microplastics. Originally with the clothes, I had considered separating them and hand washing the more synthetic clothes with eco-friendly detergent and dumping them into a garden or a yard, wherever it was dry. I guess that the thing about microplastics is that because the materials that accomadate them are often used, it’s hard to not contribute to pollution through them. This article explains it well and offers solutions through this; 

https://goodonyou.eco/what-to-do-about-microfibres/

The main take away is that micro plastics will always be around however there are ways to minimise their effect through buying more eco-friendly clothing, hand washing clothes, hang clothes in sun etc. 

With Keith and Loobie’s point, I touched on it in a previous post but I found that to be a very insightful feedback. I can see how it comes across as celebratory or, how Keith saw it as plastic bags in a tree after a storm. There is that double reading which means that the work would need to be refined a little more to reduce the celebratory reading. I think that by screen printing intimate phrases and facts about consumerist culture could contribute to that celebratory reading in a way that makes people realise that they are celebrating fast fashion and negating the environment. But there is still that possibility of reading into it so I think by enforcing the wrap with the facts, that could minimise that reading. The main point is for the words to be legible and bold for the audience to understand that their actions contribute to the slow crash of the environment. 

Finally the material; I think this could relate to the above explanation with Courtney’s point. It’s a tricky one. No matter what we’re still affecting the environment, but I think our aim is to bring more of a highlight to this issue as it’s often pushed to the aside or neglected. But it’s an everyday thing in our lives, we wear clothes everyday and there are many personal connections to clothes. These material points have stunted me though. Like either way, we aren’t necessarily helping the overflow of clothes and so to me, being picky of clothes in our work kind of negates our overall idea. I think it’s important for the location, but it for some reason makes it hard for me to consider how to work around it. There are too many variables to consider and morally, I would want to consider all of them to feel at piece with the work. 

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Here the work is in its photoshopped form. 

From the final presentation yesterday a really interesting point got brought back: the work has a celebratory aspect to it due to the clothes in the trees. I hadn’t thought about that and was very appreciative of that comment. It denoted our conservationist ideas by coming across as celebrating fast fashion and consumerism rather than highlight their irreversible effects on Mother Earth. 

What we had originally planned was to screen print facts that were altered as personal responses onto 100 articles of clothing that would be incorporated into the tree, the wrap and the mounds. This is why there are clothes incorporated into the canopy. I will admit that i ran out of time when it came to this aspect of the work as I was very busy with other classes and assignments, so when I showed a rough idea, it got knocked back. And fair, Charles and I were on that same wavelength about the need for it to be crisp and bold as that is more engaging and I would say, loud too. The two phrases that we came up with were “where do i go when you through me away” and “I will still be here in 200 years”. I think they are quite thoughtful phrases as they mix factual with intimacy. It feels like it talks over the top of the spirituality of mother earth, abusing her resources without respecting her. Maybe that’s so far up my own hippy thoughts, but I am strong believer of taking what you need from the earth and giving back, that respect between home and inhabitant. Because on this wider scale, that’s really it. As a species, we have progressed so far to disrespect the Earth that irreversible change is so close that it will occur in our lifetimes. And when I think about it, it makes me really upset to overlook and abuse the pure beauty of nature and the flow of its body. 

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As the forms on the previous post influenced our decision in how we were going to use the clothes, we settled on creating an arched trellis that would have the clothes interwoven and stitched on and around the wire. 

This was for a few reasons: 

- by using this particular shape, it allowed for the illusion of the clothes being a pile so that we are able to use less clothes

- less weight on the grass to minimise the damage 

- easy to source materials that we could re-use from recycled organisations or from marketplace (for example)

This is how it turned out:

The clothes were hand stitched as well as tied onto the frame. We also added rope underneath so that we were able to tie and knot clothes onto the mound. As we want to stick to the 2852 articles of clothing idea, this also allows for us to be able to use the clothes effectively without compromising the visual impact of the work or cheat the facts that we are basing it off. 

I’ll be honest though-- hand stitching the clothes took me way too long. I think the combined time it took me to hand-stitch what I did equaled to about half a day and that’s not that much at all. As I am not a hand-stitcher I had to learn the technique, but it isn’t really that hard, just really time consuming and I did not like that. It would be more efficient to sew some items together because really, I like the visual effect it makes with the different clothes, but it’s so time-consuming. Lucy and Aysia had mentioned to me it took them 2 hours to knot the other half of the mounds so on a real scale, it would be very time heavy. 

Also I want to add that the clothes had an affect on my allergies, there was something about them that made me keep sneezing and so I worry about what that could lead into as a large scale work. 

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we were inspired by other interactive textile works; 

I think that the choice of colour as well as the texture of either works are a hooking point that we took on with our idea. 

We initially wanted something interactive as that would draw in an audience to engage directly with a work, or at least have a memorable impression on them. But due to the virus, precautions have to be made. So we scraped that and made it a work to be engaged with visually and spatially. 

The new idea of having lumping forms and a wrapped tree still require hygiene precautions but it is more manageable. 

As we were using clothes as a main source of fabric due to how easy it is to source and how cheap it is, it turns out that we would need to wash all of the clothes, which in itself is a concern with our conceptual connection: environmentalism. We threw around the idea often of how to get past that, as a certain point of feedback we received from Loobie and Charles was to make the work personal. By making it personal it has more of an impact on an audience member, as well as being more thought provoking. I agree with that a lot. We changed out original no. of clothes (2000) to be 2852. This is based on facts that Chantell sourced for us: 

https://remake.world/stories/news/are-our-clothes-doomed-for-the-landfill/ 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-5533715/The-average-Australian-woman-wears-33-cent-wardrobe.html

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3564177/The-struggle-real-Infographic-reveals-average-woman-103-ITEMS-closet-laying-REAL-reasons-never-wear.html

Through summarising these articles, Chantell noted the number of items in a single persons closet through their lifetime thus we landed on our big number. Through that we discussed that the best way to attain these clothes is primarily through community donations and, if necessary, acquire faulty or damaged clothes from opshops/business’ etc. 

Originally that was where we were to source our clothes from, mainly focussing on op shop clothes that would be sent to landfill as well as unsellable items. I was very focussed on the idea of unsellable items as I remember someone sharing a post on Instagram about ethical thrifting. The main point I took from that was that as fun and cool it is to find unique pieces at an op shop, there are people that heavily rely on these places to attain clothes because of their financial situations. I didn’t want to let that go as a kid, that’s what my mum and I relied on with clothes. So I emphasised on preferencing for damaged or stained goods first. Despite the overflow of clothes at an op shop, intercepting the ones going to landfill was also a dominant thought in all of our minds. 

But I digress. From the point of calling out for community donations, it helped with using clean clothes as people normally washed their clothes before they give them away and if any clothes weren't washed, we’d handwash them so as to minimise the effect on the environment and stay in touch with our conceptual theme. 

Also on that, by taking away the interactive development and only having the dancer interact with the clothes, it allowed for the cleaning process during the festival to be more manageable as they would be sprayed throughout the day and the ones touched would be washed. 

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We had settled on this tree to be incorporated into our idea, which is to wrap fabrics and textiles around the tree as if to simulate the idea of ‘suffocating the environment’. Wrapping the tree makes me think of these community art and craft ideas I see when I head into the country:

(god awful resolution)

But these art and craft ideas dont relate to our conceptual aim, which is to comment on the human impact onto the environment. 

So we decided to take the idea of smothering the environment in tons of clothes, making huge lumpy clothes that invade the natural environment. Some of our early photoshop imagery includes these: 

This particular spot is right near the circle of palms and is backdropped by the towering cityscape. We chose this specifically as a correlation to human impact on an environment as well as a direct link to consumerism. I also enjoy the fact that this tree can be engaged with at any particular view and still have the connection of consumerism due to how overrun its small circumferential area is. This was an element that I wanted to include in our overall idea as I think its quite an impactful technique for an audience member to experience-- as if to never shake off their unsustainable habits. 

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Drawings for original idea. 

We wanted to create archways that would occupy a pathway so as to obstruct the natural flow of pathways and assume personal space with an audience. The archways would slowly transition from being natural with plants and plant matter, and then slowly incorporate trash until there was an archway completely made out of trash. Would be about 8 archways, roughly. The audience would be able to walk underneath but hopefully allows space for the viewers to understand their position when it comes to littering and plastic and its affects on the natural world. 

It would also incorporate a performative aspect with a dancer possibly weaving in and out of the archways or possibly incorporate a pre-recorded dance to be projected onto the ground. 

However, the idea got stunted due to the restriction of bringing foreign matter into the gardens. I think further down we would have structural and financial difficulties as well. This is including how to source the material and what to do with it after the festival is over, as well as creating a visually impactful archway whilst still making space for viewer engagement. Best to scrap it immediately to spend more time with the current idea to refine it. 

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Links to our Padlet and Google Doc

https://padlet.com/aysiaemery/x1t2nx1kri6k7zpb?fbclid=IwAR3cd8ulxRfKcsMMDSbrruqj2j5Y9SRIEMAWd78Obq0tXN7jxlns7dJc380

https://docs.google.com/document/d/15DtxkMEO1LbmM2heyPajcmdQolBLvGozJB1VdZhiwSg/edit?fbclid=IwAR3rxcvLHEIcxaYffBkVaHFpBeR0pAbrVWqaw8NPtmz5Bd6Aq1oV0t3gHs8#heading=h.il17p8f7p256

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“Reflecting Motion” (2019), Poetic Kinetics

Another kinetic work!! This work is similar to the Gronquist work in that it’s a visual representation of the movement of wind. But in this work, for me, it resembles more of what it would be like to be underneath the ocean as the waves curl and crash over a body. The streamer-like material moves in harmony together possibly due to its light weight and is intertwined into a net, suspended above a park like area. 

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“A Visual History of the Invisible” (2018), Peter Gronquist

An essay that dives into deep detail about the work: https://www.petergronquist.com/essays 

Sounds nerdy but the title just clicked in my mind as a meta-pun. 

The work is a silver spandex material suspended between two rocks with cables. As mentioned in the essay, the work took three attempts to be hoisted into the air, the first two attempts snapping the cable due to the force of the wind. The work documents that invisible nature of wind, as something that we feel but cannot see. We only see what is involved with the wind, the shapes it makes, but not what the wind is itself. 

I really enjoy the kinetic element present in the work, its quite hypnotic to watch the material sway around in the space as if it was dancing a complex routine with the wind. Kinetic energy is something that I really like in the works I’m currently looking at.

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Peter Gronquist

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“Silueta Series” (began 1973), Ana Mendieta

Info here: https://www.guggenheim.org/artwork/5221 

I love this series by Mendieta. As I am also exploring my cultural, ethnic and spiritual ties, I find that this work in some way shows a path of connection that is inherently unique but also enlightening. 

I also really like the ephemeral qualities to this work. Mendieta wanted the work to hopefully stick around for people to find as they stumble across an outline of a woman in the Earth. But most of her impressions didn’t last thus faded away with the environment 

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“Unwoven Light” (2013), Soo Sunny Park

Info snagged from Rice Gallery: http://www.ricegallery.org/soo-sunny-park 

Park creates abstracted forms that twist and turn into a space, casting multicoloured shapes and shadows around the room. These forms are made out of woven chainlink fences and iridescent glass to create a flowing and moving entity that occupies a space physically. Park uses light as a structural medium. The work affects a viewers experience depending on where they stand in relation to the suspended forms and the time of day that they visit the work. One of my most favourite abstract, sculptural works. Using light as a material whilst also creating soft forms is something that I am really interested in with this work. Especially the idea of creating something that alters an audiences perception depending on their experience with the work. 

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“Sunflower Seeds” (2010), Ai Wei Wei

Sourced here: https://www.tate.org.uk/art/artworks/ai-sunflower-seeds-t13408

This work by Ai includes a substantial (possibly towards the million) amount of handcrafted porcelain seeds that resemble sunflower seeds. He initally proposed to create a rectangle with the seeds to create something like a ‘floor’ which would include a participatory element by allowing the audience to walk on it. However, there was a risk for the audience with inhaling dust thus Ai settling on its current form. As written on the Tate site, “Sunflower Seeds explores the complexity of the Chinese individual’s relationship with society, the authorities and tradition.” The hand-crafted production of the seeds was manufactured in Jingdezhen, a city historically known for its fabrication of porcelain. Sunflower seeds were also a symbol for the Cultural Revolution in China in 1960′s and 1970′s. Also stated by Tate, Ai’s work “prompts a closer look at the ‘Made in China’ phenomenon commonly associated with cheap mass-produced goods.”

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“A Line Made By Walking” (1967), Richard Long

Sourced from Tate Mordern: https://www.tate.org.uk/art/artworks/long-a-line-made-by-walking-p07149

Long photographed his physical intervention with the an environment, a flattened path through a field or prairie. He notes that from his hitchhiking adventures, he would stop and walk in a straight line back and forth. Over time, this disturbed the grass to the point it created a natural path. 

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My Practice and I

As a multidisciplinary artist, I explore layered themes of cultural hybridity, estrangement, nudity, flesh and the body through paintings, photography and video works. My fusion of cultural and ethnic backgrounds influence my identity as a third culture kid. Thus flowing into my feelings of alienation, disconnection and approaching topics with caution whilst trying to bridge the gaps between my detachments. Moreover, my interest with the body is just as complex as I can’t quite describe why I work with the topic. I appreciate all there is to a body and being and it is possible that my interest stems from my own self loathe. Through these main concepts and mediums, I hope to create works that are provoking and intimate for a viewer whilst allowing enough ambiguity to emanate my personal experiences and vulnerability. 

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Various Works

Digital Text Manipulation