hymnfortheshamelss - Tumblr blog

[hymnfortheshamelss]

I think I'm evil now 🥵

[hymnfortheshamelss]

It's been more than a month. When am I gonna find the stranger that I ran into for an hour in another country that completely mesmerised me??? Why haven't they shown up yet in a random bookstore???

[hymnfortheshamelss]

When I said I wanted to relate to a Taylor Swift song I meant New Romantics not fucking champagne problems lmao

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Ever since I was sexually assaulted my outlook on so many of the people in my life that I thought of as close to me changed. Because I realized, if I tell these people what happened, they'll put some blame on me. And I think since then I've been subconsciously pulling away from all the people that I know will have that reaction. I'm grateful to be someone that understands that what happened to me was in no way or form, my fault.

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Am I seriously planning my next break up rn ☠️☠️☠️

[hymnfortheshamelss]

I have officially fallen out of love and I literally cannot feel anything at all now lol

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Sometimes I truly think something is wrong with me. In fact I don't think it; I know it. And I know I wasn't always like this. Ive developed into this being that feels no guilt or remorse anymore for things that'd make a 'normal' person quiver in disgust at. And I look forward to those things. I actively plan them. I can't wait until the next time I get to carry out my schemes cuz those are suddenly the only things that make me feel anything at all. I am actually incapable of feeling 'love' and empathy. I just know how to blend in now. I know all the right things to say, all the right ways to react, all the right moods to put yourself in when something 'bad' happens.

What now?

[hymnfortheshamelss]

David Bowie

Catherine Deneuve

"The Hunger" [1983]

Peter Murphy, also The Hunger [1983]

The Hunger is a marvelous movie that asks what if David Bowie and Catherine Deneuve were sexy vampires. Also what if Bauhaus showed up. In my rockier years I used to go to YouTube and just watch the opening ten minutes on a loop.

[hymnfortheshamelss]

How does one 15 minute encounter with a stranger have my head in a buzz 2 weeks later. Omfg. Who am I lol.

[hymnfortheshamelss]

The person I am today is someone my 14 year old self would be in awe of, but also extremely disappointed in. Fml.

[hymnfortheshamelss]

[hymnfortheshamelss]

LABYRINTH 1986 | dir. Jim Henson

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Skins (2007-2013)

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Unfortunately I just want to be choked lol

i want a soft connection. i want to be asked how my day went and if i need anything. i want forehead kisses. i want the back of my hand kissed at red lights. i want to be asked how i’m mentally feeling. i want to hold hands everywhere we go.

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Girl get over it. You'll never see that flame again. But right now it's still burning so bright in my mind, it shines away everything else, all I can see is that light. I can't wait for it to dim and die.

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Now I know I'm never gonna love again

[hymnfortheshamelss]

Foolish one stop checking your mailbox for confessions of love