i-dont-like-menthols - Tumblr blog

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I just feel like my time here as come to an end.

I always feel the need to write updates about my life, kinda venting… and I realise that it’s just not healthy, having this need for sharing stuff. What’s the point?!

Plus tumblr was me from a long time ago and I’m no longer that same person, I have evolved.

I really think it is time.

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NOOOO don't goooo you soooo sexyyyyy

What do you mean?!! 🤣😅

How would you know! 😬

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I am the sex master!! 💪🏻😬 I just gave my boyfriend 2 orgasms in a matter of like a minute! Let’s say we were surprised! 🙈🙉🙊

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I think I might delete my tumblr…

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Wine and gin and fuck everything.

That’s all I have to say about what’s gonna happen tonight.

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doing normal stuff while listening to metal is so funny because I'm eating cereal and this guy is screaming at me

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It always feels like 2 steps forward and then 5 back.

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I’m fucking exhausted with everything! It’s just so fucking hard and it feels like it’s harder everyday.

Waiting for the boyfriend and we’re getting smashed!

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Because everything that’s going on is not enough… my son has now been throwing up since 5 am.

Idk what I’ve done.

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umm i need reassurance that my presence is wanted but i can’t ask for reassurance because that’s really Embarrassing and it wouldn’t feel genuine if i asked for it

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sometimes their behavior is your answer

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That was one of the hardest conversations I have ever had… and I think there will be more to come.

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How the fuck am I gonna do this?!

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Tmi

I swear to god I have never had sex this good! 🥵

Everything about it with him is just so easy, I don’t feel self conscious and neither does he, we just share incredible chemistry and sexually we really are compatible, he makes me feel safe and never once I’ve done something I didn’t want to and he keeps reminding me that I don’t have to do anything I’m not comfortable with, which is so fucking awesome to hear your partner express this. But to be honest, with him, I’m all yesses because it really is easy and we enjoy the same things… because of him I’ve found a new relationship with sex and that’s kinda cool tbh.

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I’m so fucking stupid!!!!

Why am I so messy?!!! I’ve been looking for an important paper all afternoon and I can’t find it! 😤😤😤 I’ve looked everywhere it should be and nothing.

Useless!

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Today felt good.

Now I just need to cope with the weekend and next week until Thursday . First he’s going to spend the weekend with his parents… and then he’s going to Brussels with work from Monday to Wednesday night.

Honestly… dreading it, it’s gonna be torture. 🙄

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“One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay. (Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.) Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks. Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris. Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together. Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own. (Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.) Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you. Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place. Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects. Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers. Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do. Love, Dad.”

— Big Poppa E., “How To Make Love” (via boldly-toward-the-stars)