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all i had, i gave.

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do publishers realize that advertising books using fanfic tropes spoils the experience of reading an original story. stop telling me it’s enemies to lovers and there was only one bed and unrequited love hurt comfort golden retriever black cat timeloop major character death. why do i give a fuck if i don’t know any of the characters and now plus i already know the entire plot of the story. that’s what ao3 is supposed to be for

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I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. A guy asked me what the Spanish word for tortilla was once and now I dream of kissing him under the moonlight

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Please forgive me for ranting, but...I am so tired of AI. Just so tired. I don't want Microsoft Copilot, or Google Gemini, or Meta AI, or whatever other energy-sucking, water-wasting, mediocrity-spewing LLM is currently being thrust upon me. I just want to be left alone to create in peace.

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No I can't be aroace, look at this list of all the crushes I've had who all happened to be fictional characters and famous people completely out of my reach while any thought of me liking someone I might even have a chance with made me deeply uncomfortable!

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RODARTE Fall/Winter RTW 2025 if you want to support this blog consider donating to: ko-fi.com/fashionrunways

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Ok, I stopped barking long enough to write down some stuff. Let’s talk about the Ramil/Paytai nc scene. I’m seeing some discourse along the lines of “Ramil realized that he was being abusive with Paytai”, “he realized he was perpetuating the violence that Paytai suffered at the hands of his father” etc. and as someone who is a dom IRL (not as a job but for personal fun time), I wanted to share some thoughts and maybe provide some insights.

First, I can’t stress this enough: bdsm play is not abuse. Dom/sub dynamics (properly negotiated) are not abuse.

Ramil is absolutely not abusive in his intimate life with Paytai. He literally doesn’t move a muscle unless Paytai tells him to. I’m not saying he’s never toxic - he’s obviously very jealous and possessive. Tbh though, I think he’s actually not that controlling outside the figurative bedroom. Many times we see him actually defer to Paytai instead of deciding something by himself and imposing it, which is (ahem) more than can be said about Khanin with Charan.

But engaging in bdsm play is not abuse. Pain/impact play is not abuse, it’s not violence. Violence is about inflicting harm/damage - Ramil never wants to harm Paytai, the show makes that abundantly clear.

I also don’t think flogging (and whatever other pain play they engage in) was introduced by Ramil, based on who he is shown to be and the fact that he never moves a finger until Paytai tells him to. I believe that Paytai is the one who initially asked Ramil to use a flogger on him, because he’s the, let’s say, main sub in the relationship and bdsm play (usually) centers around the sub’s desires. Paytai choosing to integrate flogging into his sex life, when and how he chooses, with a partner he loves and trusts, can be a way to reclaim something that harmed him in a different context and find empowerment in it. It is not the same thing as perpetuating violence. Paytai is not a victim in his sex life.

When we see the brief flashback of the night before the bike ride, Paytai is wearing a collar tied to a chain, which Ramil holds as he fucks him. This is also bdsm, and it’s very clear in the scene that they are both having a great fucking time. No one is being taken advantage of.

Now the end of the lace scene: Ramil not wanting to use the flogger (whip) on Paytai doesn’t mean that he suddenly doesn’t vibe with their dom/sub dynamic or bdsm play. I personally think for Ramil, the pain play was never his thing, really; he did it for Paytai. His thing was always the ownership - the reassurance that Paytai is his and his alone, that he’s not going anywhere. He can realize that he’s not comfortable using a flogger anymore, or maybe in that specific moment, because of the trauma they’ve both experienced but still enjoy tying up Paytai, being tied up by him, having Paytai tell him he belongs to him, etc. It can also be that in that moment, what he (Ramil) needed the most was softness. It doesn’t make any of the other stuff bad.

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If Prince Rachata finds out that you skipped your training... Companions must endure and take the blame for one another.

Jimmy Karn as PRINCE RAMIL and Ohm Thanakrit as PAYTAI THE NEXT PRINCE | EP. 8 (+EP. 4)

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Please put them in suits forever.

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Does anyone want to challenge our champion?

AOU THANABOON AS MEK AND BOOM THARATORN AS DECH

Memoir of Rati (2025)

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*whispering to myself the entire time I'm watching Memoir of Rati*

GMMTV wouldn't hurt me. It's the Hallmark Channel of BL. It's the Disney of BL. It's the Teletubbies of BL.

No one has ever died or been split up in a GMMTV BL because GMMTV wouldn't hurt a branded pair. It needs them for fan meets and selling merch.

So regardless of the historical conflict, the gays will live happily ever after.

Everything will be fine. Fine, fine, fine. The finest it's ever been. Never been finer.

PLEASE, GOD!

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First I thought Thun got attached to Keen unreasonably quickly (why is he okay with bathing this stranger that he doesn't even seem to like?). But then I saw his interactions with Typhoon and realised Thun just. Likes boys so much. Will fold the minute an attractive boy so much as breathes in his direction. Knew there was something a little off about Keen but still couldn't stop himself from getting closer. Just incredibly gay. Good for him.

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Still living for Ramil setting aside the flogger because of a traumatic memory and leaning into Paytai entirely, covering up the places his father beats him, protecting him with his body in the only place he can protect him. Ramil just leaning over to put Paytai under himself entirely, to fulfill a different need in that moment and how Paytai embraced that embrace for exactly what it was, giving and taking comfort and protection.

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I love this moment so much.

Dom-drop is extremely real, and it doesn't always happen at the end of a session during the aftercare phase. It can happen literally any time, with all the emotions that go full blast during sex.

I love that he absolutely crashes out of Dom mode. I love that Paytai sees it and is just there, holding his hand, not trying to force Ramil back into his Dom state, but just being there for him.

Holding his hand while Ramil comes down, and sharing the pain Ramil feels. Not going "I'm fine", but Paytai actually looks sad. He knows why Ramil is hurting, and he won't pretend it doesn't hurt him too.

Kissing the hand Ramil uses to hold him down, letting Ramil know it's okay, he's here because he loves him. Every side of him. Paytai giving Ramil the aftercare he needs even while they're still having sex. Kissing the Dom who fled into Ramil's shadows.