imustshipyou

[imustshipyou]

[imustshipyou]

i was at an event last night in california and i went to the bar to order wine bc wine was like, a thing, and i looked at the menu and saw i was completely out of my depth bc idk any wine names, so i turned to my right and there was a man in a gorgeous suit standing at the bar beside me and i said “do you know anything about wine?” and he said “a little, yes!” i told him i liked white and dry wines and asked if he��d order for me. he asked the server for two glasses and had one poured for each of us and then he clinked his glass on mine but he didn’t take a sip, he just watched me taste mine and then he asked what i thought and i said “it’s pretty good, but like i said, i wouldn’t know.” he laughed and told me to have a good time & i walked away. fifteen minutes later i found out he’s the winemaker.

[imustshipyou]

*dies hundreds of years ago as the village fool* well that fucking sucked lol let’s try again *reincarnated as a tumblr user* FUUUUUUCK

[imustshipyou]

I think if you can figure out what is causing Symptoms that the inside of your brain should go DING DING DING and then the Symptoms say Fuck, you got me! and leave

[imustshipyou]

[imustshipyou]

i hate people who know highways. “i’m heading south on I-65” okay man. i’m moving my rook to c2

[imustshipyou]

Yeah that tracks

[imustshipyou]

the plague tale twitter account is so funny cuz they have regular posts telling you about the game and such but every so often it’s just

and i eat it up every time

it’s always funny

honorable mentions:

[imustshipyou]

it's

bitch

[imustshipyou]

honestly i never thought the phrased “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation

[imustshipyou]

literally though if you feel like your life is slipping through your fingers and every day goes too fast… try doing hard things, not just taking the easy route, like reading and making art and exercising and cooking a meal from scratch and journaling, doing these things without distraction, without being absorbed on a screen… the time will stretch and you’ll be reminded that life is long and beautiful if you make it so.

[imustshipyou]

'Changer' is what the slur for trans people would be if they were written into existence for a YA dystopian novel

[imustshipyou]

I just now realized your URL is coolben94 and not coolbean94...

are u the person thats been sending me “COOOOL BEEEAAAAANNNN” every week for 5 months

[imustshipyou]

the jump from 2015 to 2020 was 10 years but the jump from 2020 to 2025 was 11 months

[imustshipyou]

greta thunberg, liam cunningham, rima hassan, and everyone else on that ship, thank you, and i hope you succeed. i really hope you succeed. you know what you are risking, and i wish for you to come back safely, having done what you set out to do.

[imustshipyou]

when i was at walgreens (at 3 in the morning which explains all of this) the cashier was talking to her coworker about how shed rather be a werewolf than a vampire because vampires are condemned to hell but werewolves arent and then she asked me what i thought and i said vampire because im already condemned to hell and she said in the nicest tone of voice “i dont think anybody is condemned to hell….” paused, stared at me for a few moments, and added on “…not even gay people” 

[imustshipyou]

rip lance you would have loved gooner emotes

quick voltron art now that im almost done with all my final submissions for the year!!