imworkingon-it

[imworkingon-it]

hey gamers i am genuinely doing so mucb better abt this mow btw !!!! still got one but im doing better !!!!

it's not an eating disorder if you don't eat

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it's not an eating disorder if you don't eat

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hm . is that a crush or am i simoly romanticizing my past from b4 i trued to kms

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literally fuck me . wtf ???? i swear i was iver my ed but nooooo i just had to fuck myself over didnt i

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i . have no fucking clue what this was abt

if there was ever a time to have a bad memory >>>

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am not forgettin :(

if there was ever a time to have a bad memory >>>

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GUESS !!! WHO'S !!! NOT !! DOIN !! GOOOD !!!!!!!!

it's me

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how do i fix this. olease someone tell me how do i fix this

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i'm tired in every way i think

i know that i'm tired of forgetting

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i think i'm tired

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gonna go out on a limb and say if it werent for the fact im so good at repressing my emotions i'd doing Very Badly!

good news tho! im good at repressing lol

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there is smth seriously wrong w me lol

wtvr tho

im so tired but thats what happens when u get so close to actually feeling an emotion LMAO

rip to me for doing so good and so bad simitanoiusly

what ever the fuck i cannont bring myself to physically care

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ha ha i fucked up

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am i even really surprised? like. am i.

bevause i dont think i am. she always gave hints and just made it alot more clear now i guess

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK

whatever. fuck me i guess

i expected it and im angry about it but i cant fucking do anything about it

she has so many double standards and won't even acknowledge that shes wrong about it

like fuck off im fucking to scared to talk about this woth her for a fucking reason

like with anyone here.

fuck me i fucking saw the signs i fucking knew everything i fucking knew it

fuck

what the fuck ever im not allowed to be angry yet it doesn't fucking matter you cant be fucking angry over this right now and not for a fucking while get a fucking grip

get a fucking grip thats all

whatever

[imworkingon-it]

seriously. god what the fuck. could you have not funking done it? god what the fuck

but is this really a set back if it was really just. always there? like ive been thinking about it so damn often yeah

like yeah obviously i have reasons not to. obviously. but like. do i. do i really. the biggest thing stopping me is im a coward

and god. god what the FUCK

fuck fuck fuck i need to get a fucking grip. fuck me

what ever.

it really doesnt matter. im never gonna fucking do it. maybe.

im really just a fucking coward

likw. thats really . like if he died that might be the push i needed and id fucking do it but god what the fuck would happen

why am i even thinking about this stop thinming about this you think about this too fucking ifteb

can i jsut fucking go back i want to go back but im so fucking scared stop youre gonna cry stop stop stop fucking stop

get a grip lmao

youre a fucking coward

i want to go back but i wouldnt go if i had the opportunity yk ow

you dont do enough harm to yourself

at least when you stopped eating you were doing something

im not me in the way i want to be and thats my own fault

do you think if some one offered youd say yes

because i think about that alot

you even think about it if it isnt offered

fuck me over im fucked up anywya

i mean no im not im fine its fine and all but like maybe im just scared

like youre just scared of dying and ehat happens after but youre so fucking scared of living forever so does it even fucking matter

i think im tired

but im fine

so whatever

i mean im just tired of this world. like not of living and not of libing here but just. under this tense late capitalism world

im worried about getting a job that will pay enough for me to live with away from here and getting a degree

im going to die in debut but it doesnt matter because im already afraid of both

i dont even need to say im fine again becsue im just so tired im fine now you know ?

that apathy i feel now might be better for me sometimes

i forget why i started this and i dont really think i want to remember

i will anyway. always forget what i need to know and never forget what id ram my head into a concrete wall to let go off

[imworkingon-it]

why am i like this

im so tired. god im so tired

i keep fucking feeling things and then i think about it and i cant do that. i cant think about these things i cant i cant

did you know that i think ill never be happy? bevause i didnt know i thought that u till i started thinking

or like. or like maybe i did know.

because i keep fucking forgetting.

god im so fucking tired

[imworkingon-it]

this can't keep happening.