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chat i am. going to be honest school just started for me i dont think i have the time to keep restocking the queue for this blog! so posts will either go on hiatus until i have more time or significantly slow down. we'll see

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Adaine, talking to Kipperlily: With all due respect, which is none…

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Fig: I have yet to encounter a problem where a sword didn't factor into the solution at least in some way.

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Gorgug: Kristen has discovered "deez nuts" jokes and it's all she says now. Everything is deez nuts. She simply can't stop. Gorgug: I asked Kristen where she learned that joke. She made me promise she wouldn't get in trouble if she told me. I agreed. Gorgug: So she leaned in and whisper, "deez nuts."

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Fabian: Am I a good person? No. But do I try to be better every single day? Also no.

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Adaine: So when are we gonna tell her? Fabian: Just give them a minute. Fig: *Pulling on a door that clearly says push.*

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Kristen: What goes up but never comes down? Riz: The amount of stress you're bringing this family.

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Fabian: Riz, please calm down. Riz: I asked for two large fries! Riz: *dumps fries onto table* Riz: But all they did was give me a MILLION FUCKING LITTLE ONES!

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Fabian: Not to brag, but I can go into the Spirit Halloween without crying.

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Riz: Mice are having sex in my walls. Adaine: Tattletale! Kristen: You're just being ungrateful. Fig: It's their home too, you know. Fabian: So what? Don't slutshame them. Riz: The mice are fucking AND now I'm getting heckled.

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Fabian: Pros and cons of dating me. Fabian: Pros. You'll be the cute one. Fabian: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-

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Fig: Ayda is off at an appointment, so while they’re gone, I’m going to cut the sleeves off all of my shirts. Kristen: Why? Fig: She's like 90% of my impulse control.

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Kristen: You use emoji’s like a straight person. Adaine: That’s literally the worst thing anyone has ever said about me.

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Gorgug: I wouldn’t put it in those words exactly. Riz: Why not? Gorgug: Because I don't know what they mean.

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Adaine: If you kill me, my teeth only have a 2% drop rate. Kristen: What? Adaine: Good luck.

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Sandra Lynn: Well Fig, I have to say, I'm really disappointed. Fig: Well, you didn't HAVE to say it. You could've just thought it.

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Fabian: What kinds of sounds annoy you? Riz: Are we talking real sounds or imaginary ones? Fabian, now interested: Lets say imaginary. Riz: Spiders wearing flip flops.