incorrectamericanrevolution

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

People will build entire arguments on the French Revolution based on inaccuracies or lies and then whine that we're being "elitist" for correcting them.

Your argument basically rests on saying the historical equivalent of "1+1=3" and when corrected you deflect with "well not anyone's an expert and tbh this is elitist maybe 1+1 does equal 3 did you consider that?"

I know history isn't a "hard science" like math (lol) but it's still a science, it still has rules, and you can't argue that, say, Olympe de Gouges was arrested for "speaking out against the Terror" when what we identify as the period of "the Terror" didn't exist yet.

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

oh he's your 'right hand man'? for what, jerking you off?

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

not sure that infantilizing robespierre is better than vilifying him but i guess it’s a new exciting chapter in his historiography lmao

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Getting emotional @ Bonbon following everything Maximilien did and it not quite working out because they’re just not the same person but then finally blossoming as a representative en mission 😭

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

i do think it'd be like really funny if Those Words jc hamilton crossed out in his dad's letter to jlau like weren't sexual at all they were just kind of tmi. "don't forget to tell her the length of my nose and also that i fart a lot in my sleep."

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Do you there’s a reason Burr fucked so much or was he just born like that?

yeah he popped out wearing a Born 2 Fuck tee shirt

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Fun Fact: Hamilton visited Laurens near Laurens’s 26th birthday when Laurens was a POW.  Hamilton wrote the following in a letter to Elizabeth Schuyler dated October 27, 1780:

I expect in a few days to go to Philadelphia for a day or two. I shall there see my friend and make him participate in my good fortune by giving him a picture of my mistress.

The friend is John Laurens.  And apparently his birthday gift was a picture of Hamilton’s wife-to-be.

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Danton gets called ugly by contemporaries compilation

The audacity on the brow, the laughter of debauchery on the lips, the ferocity of his face denounces that of his heart; he unnecessarily borrows from Bacchus an apparent bonhomie and jovial feasting; the passion of his speeches, the violence of his gestures, the bestiality of his oaths betray him. Mémoires de Madame Roland (1793)

Danton, the only man I feared for liberty’s sake, whose robust form, colossal eloquence, hideous face, frightened the image of Liberty! Vadier at the Convention, April 5 1794

Danton was horribly ugly, and had a sinister face, he was very strong, he said himself that he had athletic forms. His talents were mediocre, but he supplemented them by a great deal of impudence and effrontery; his voice shook the vaults of the hall, his elocution was vehement, and impressed the tribunes with gigantic images. Histoire, caréctere de Maximilien Robespierre et anecdotes sur ses succeseurs (1794)

And this Danton, whom pleasure did not render human, which is the true mark of a ferocious character, what a stamp on his hideously crushed face! The eternal pallor of C…    Le Nouveau Paris (1797) by Louis-Sébastien Mercier, volume 6, page 12

Danton held the nature of athletic and colossal forms; a soul endowed with energy, an ardent imagination and a very strong voice, without being sonorous or flexible. But to these advantages was added a hideous face, which became even more repulsive when he tried to soften, by awkwardly polished manners, the harshness of his looks. Histoire philosophique de la Révolution de France volume 5 by Antoine Fantin-Desodoards (1807) page 363

The only member of the government I saw, whose brutality revolted me, was Danton. There was something inexpressibly savage and ferocious in his looks, and in his stentorian voice. His coarse shaggy hair gave him the appearance of a wild beast. To add to the fierceness of his repulsive countenance, he was deeply marked with small-poxes, and his eyes were unusually small, and sparkling in surrounding darkness, like the fabulous carbuncle. David, who looked upon him as a demi-god, attemted several times to delineate this horrid countenance. Recollections of Republican France 1791-1801 by J.G Millingen (1848) page 300

One day, among others, [madame Panis] took me to Sèvres, to a country house inhabited by Danton. I had never seen him; but great God! How ugly he was! […] He had the sort of repulsive features that frighten one […] I was very young; but his face scared me so much that I pleaded insistently with Mme Panis not to bring me back to that house […] The horrid mien of that man followed me everywhere. Memoirs of Élisabeth Lebas 

[Danton] did not at all conserve the dignity suited to the representative of a great people in his manners; his toilette was in disorder. Mémoires de Charlotte Robespierre sur ses deux frères (1834) page 137

Danton, whose hideous face is traumatic for liberty. This violent hyperbole came from Saint-Just.  Souvernirs de la révolution et de l’empire (1850) by Charles Didier, volume 1, page 268

The scenes at the Cordeliers, which I witnessed three or four times, were dominated and presided over by Danton. A vandal in the size of Goth, snub-nosed, windy nostrils, seamed flats, the face of a gendarme mixed with that of a lustful and cruel prosecutor. […] Inferior, even in ugliness, to Mirabeau, whose money he had been, Danton was superior to Robespierre, without having, like him, given his name to his crimes. Mémoires d’Outre-tombe (1860) by François-René vicomte de Chateaubriand volume 1, page 503 and 505

With Danton as with Mirabeau, speech was greatly aided by the gaze, the gesture and that energetic ugliness of the face, often superior, to produce certain effects, even beauty. A contemporary of this gigantic orator, Garat, said of him: “Danton never wrote and printed a speech.”  Mémoires de la Societé d’agriculture, commerce, sciences et arts du department de la Marse, Chalons-sur-Marne (1862) page 594

Look, all I’m saying is that if this portrait is a good ressemblance of Billaud-Varennes, I have no idea why it’s Danton that always gets singled out as the ugly one.

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Nice

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

French Revolution Halloween costume ideas that aren’t zoombie Marie Antoinette with a guillotine wound: 

(Disclaimer: I have no idea how to put in practice most of them in an easy and cost-effective way) 

Zombie Robespierre with a guillotine AND a jaw wound 

Olympe de Gouges with a 16 or 24 canonball strapped to her foot 

Charlotte Robespierre in Fouché’s iconic red coat (she killed him)

Fouché with his fake Robespierre hit lists 

A giant SNAKE in Fouché’s iconic red coat

David drinking the hemlock (”with an empty glass, or no glass at all”, @frevandrest‘s idea)/duo costume idea: Robespierre with a bottle labeled “hemlock” or a bouquet of hemlock flowers, looking for David. 

Saint-Just and his one fork

Saint-Just, Le Bas, and their mustaches

Saint-Just and a decapitated fern

military Saint-Just in a bicorn (but everyone thinks you’re Napoléon)

Saint-Just in his bath (but everyone thinks you’re Marat)

Saint-Just shoe collecting for the Armies 

Charlotte Robespierre (in one of her amazing Les Visiteurs 3 outfits) and a pot of jam

Fabre d’Eglantine singing il pleut il pleut bergère 

Half-naked Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Reine Audu cosplaying as Marat (from Un peuple et son roi)

Robespierre and a pyramid of oranges

If the Directoire is allowed at the party: show up in a curtain and with a flower pot on the head (@frevandrest’s idea) 

Feel free to add more!

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Can you explain James Monroe to me?

no one can explain james monroe he's like anti matter

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

I really do believe that if they had lube in Valley Forge we would have lost the war

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Insane how people blame Hamilton's cheating on the fact that he was just like.... so horny as if jerking off wasn't invented in 1791

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Clinton, brandishing a knife: Give me all your money!

Burr: How about instead I buy that knife from you for all the money I have on me?

Clinton: Okay.

Clinton: ...Shit, now you're just gonna rob all your money back!

Burr: No, because I'm not a dick who robs people!

Clinton: That hurt more than a stab wound.

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

i just got the stupidest idea for a drawing. see you in 8 hours

[incorrectamericanrevolution]

Treason trial era Burr is the most guilty innocent person ever