incorrectlostodyssey

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Jansen: This is my wife, Ming, and this is Ming's girlfriend, Seth.

Ming: Hey.

Sarah: Hey... oh... wait, sorry. What’s the situation?

Jansen: What do you mean?

Sarah: How does this work?

Jansen: Ming is straight for me, but she's gay for Seth, and Seth is really gay for Ming. And I hate Seth.

Seth: It's not that complicated.

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Ming, to Jansen: This may be a frivolous question but what are you doing?

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Sarah, handing Mack a sandwich: Here you go, Mack.

Jansen: *grabs the sandwich* Mmmm, yummy.

Sarah: Jansen!

Jansen: Why should the child go first? I’m far larger. And hungrier.

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Jansen: We can make this work! We're Romeo and Juliet!

Ming: It didn't work for Romeo and Juliet. That play ends in a tragic double suicide.

Jansen: That's how it ends? Why do people like it so much?

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Jansen: See? See, one day you're gonna look back on this and laugh.

Seth: I assure you, for the rest of my life, every time I look back on this I will personally run over to your house and smack you.

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Mack: I have done nothing wrong ever in my life.

Sarah: I know this, and I love you.

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Sarah: We’ve got to find a way to cut down on expenses. What can we live without?

Kaim: Probably Jansen and Tolten.

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Jansen, to Cooke and Mack: It's unnatural for siblings to get along as well as you do.

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Jansen: As your best friend-

Seth: Ming is my best friend.

Jansen: AS YOUR BEST FRIEND...

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Kaim: Yield or die.

Sarah: Just, take it down to like...a seven.

Kaim: Yield or else.

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Tolten: I'm not helping you.

Gongora: Why not? Is this because I once betrayed you?

Tolten: Yes! It was our last interaction!

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Seth: I think I'm getting better at this. I didn't even stab him.

Jansen: And we are so proud of you. No-stabbing Wednesdays. New tradition.

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Kaim: *carrying groceries in both arms*

Sarah: *reaches out to help*

Kaim: *switches all groceries to one arm so he can hold her hand*

Sarah: That's not what I- okay

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Tolten: Seth! I knew you’d come back to save me!

Seth: Everyone would think I murdered you if I didn’t.

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Seth: Parlay. My ship. Five minutes.

Tolten: Parlay?

Jansen: Pirate code. She wants to meet.

Tolten: So everyone here knows pirate code?

Jansen: I understand it, I can't speak it.

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Sarah: Truth or dare?

Cooke: Truth.

Sarah: How many hours have you slept this week?

Cooke: Dare.

Sarah: Go to sleep.

Cooke: I don’t like this game.

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Tolten: You're the best friend I ever had.

Seth: You're... pretty okay too