indigobluedreams

[indigobluedreams]

Appearing for my once a month I'm alive post.

Happy Valentines day, Your F/os are sending all the love they can give you right now. I don't thing one holiday could help tell you completely about their feelings for you.

They'll continue to love you day in, day out so don't tell yourself otherwise ♡♡

[indigobluedreams]

Hey! I saw your carrd and the bit about Youtubers - what about Dream SMP characters? Is that alright to request?

Oh! Hey there! I'm not too open to YouTubers being self shipped romantically, Like the people because their real and stuff. Platonic selfshipping to me is chill? Cause Its?? Different?? If that even makes sense lmao. As far as the dream SMP goes, I don't like selfshipping with the people themselves, But if your doing it with the character their playing, Which technically is themselves but isn't??? Cause they're rping as themselves but as more of a characterization?? I see it simillar to DND and well,,,, people rp romantic stuff so it's fine if that's the case, But that's my shitty opinion.

As long as your respectful and recognise that they are people and you ain't gonna like,,,, Go bananas??? Like romantic selfshipping for dream smp stuff is a fuzzy line for me. But Plantonic and Famillial to me is more fine since it probably won't make people uncomfortable lmao. You can dm me to discuss finer details if that helps cause I'm not the best at explaining stuff.

Thanks for asking first though! That is VERY considerate of you and I highly appreciate it ♡♡♡♡♡

P.S.: if you ever wanna talk about dream smp though hmu, Recently got into it but I really enjoy the series 👀👀

[indigobluedreams]

So Uh. Guess who's speed running their project for college because they just realized the deadline is tommorow. The idiots did.

I'm idiots.

[indigobluedreams]

Ichimatsu’s reaction when it comes to cats | | Osomatsu-san S3 Episode 6

[indigobluedreams]

i've always been curious which one of my f/o's do my mutuals mostly associate me with, like whenever they see the character, they think of me. so, send me an f/o's name(s) that makes you think of me in my inbox!

[feel free to reblog but make sure to practice reblog karma for whoever you're reblogging it from!]

[indigobluedreams]

head empty. 

Only Ichimatsu thrives

[indigobluedreams]

Okay so no-one is suprised but I'm gonna start selfshipping with Piers 😔

But I have a whole plot line concerning shitty plot. Because I have a Skuntank on my team and he does too so it's only logical that we met during the time he entered the tournament, Cause we both did and mutually were like " Oh you have one too? ". I dunno if we'd be rivals though but low-key here for enemies / rivals to friends. Then pine for a couple years then we together 😳😳

Sorry I just really enjoy the fact it's probably been years of stupid pining and it's So painfully obvious-

[indigobluedreams]

Vent, feel free to scroll

This is a shitty vent about some stuff that happened recently and I can’t get it out of my head no matter how much I try to think. Like I just hurt but ‘m not surprised about it either. I feel shitty writing this but I just need to get it off my chest before I do something stupid.

TW: Past relationships, Exs, Unhealthy relationships(??)

So, I don't really like talking about it because it didn't feel like a real, authentic relationship to me on my end. So I don't know what to concider it. But around August two years before, I dated someone for a month but I never felt like he loved me, It was more that he was using me to make someone else jealous. Like, He'd constantly talk about this girl and he was clearly in love with her. I don't think I liked liked him, Or maybe I did. I'm not sure since it was my first and since then only relationship and I've always been insecure so maybe I'm over thinking it. I just kept thinking over and over again and never felt like he actually liked me, Y'know? All I knew was hey: I like you but I'll keep talking about THIS GIRL because you know. I understand talking about friends but God fucking dammit, You talk about her and her only 90% of the time. We played a few online games and he would always talk and try to giggle with her. He was nice to me, But clearly liked her better. He told me he was romantically interested in her and the only reason he hadn't said anything was because she had a boyfriend before and as we were together. I dunno if he was dense or all my insecurities and shit were true.

But today, I was vibing and my sibling pointed out that him and the girl he'd kept talking about had matching pfps that looked extremly intimate and I'm scared. I don't WANT to assume, but it feels like it was true, That he didn't actually love me and was really only using me for his own personal gain, He vented to me alot but sometimes I felt like his therapist rather than his partner. He told me lies and to think when he did break up with me, I was fine about it. It hurt like hell but I didn't wanna be that ' one ex ' that doesn't take it well and makes the other feel like shit, I’ve seen that so much in media I really don’t wanna be that with how others act after. This has been my first and only relationship and I don't think I want another. I mean, I do but just. I don't want one like that, Where I feel shitty if almost all the time. Hell, I feel like a shit human being writing this but I have to get this off my chest otherwise I know it’s gonna eat at me all year. I don't want to talk about it to others directly because they'll make a big deal out of it so I'd rather just dump my feelings here. I haven't talked to him for since April last year. But even clicking on those messages hurt. I don't plan on contacting him and if he tries to message me in future, Cause I feel like he may if they break up, I'm going to ghost him: Because I know the moment he starts talking to me again it's going to fucking break me.

If you have any advice on what to do, Let me know. I'd appreciate it alot. Like majorly. Thanks for reading this and listening to me just have at it, I don't wanna sound like a shitty person either so If I do, Let me know how I can genuinely improve myself.

[indigobluedreams]

First off, Little new years message because Eyyy, Happy new year / Happy Hogmanay if your celebrating. If not, I hope you're having a nice night. You've come this far and with how this year has been, I'm proud of you. Your strong enough to have faced what you have this year and that means alot. So pat yourself on the back because I cannot physically. But remember: It's okay to be weak, Just pick yourself up and keep on doing what you do best! I believe in you and whatever goals your working towards this year! Your doing be proud by just doing that alone!

.....

Unrelated to the new years message. I started playing Pokemon shield! I'm having a ton of fun and I'm going with a poison type team! My starter was Grookey cause they were my favourite out the three and I have a habit of picking the grass type starters most of the time. But it's been real fun! I'm currently going through route 7 ( I've only been playing the game for 2 days but have been focusing on MOSTLY LEVELJNG my team. ). I plan on making a sona cause Uh. Gained alot of Platonic f/os which will be added to my list tommorow. Romantic f/os. I think a few people are neat but nothing besides that since I haven't really talked an awful lot to them. Maybe when I do battle them properly I'll be able to make up my mind. Until then, I'm gonna go pass out cause my sleep schedule is horrendous.

BUT if anyone Uhhh wants to talk to me about Pokemon swsh do it- especially if you selfship, I wanna vibe with people and listen to them ramble cutely about f/os in general so concider this an invitation for anyone ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

[indigobluedreams]

Drew this to make me not cry after a pretty unepic meeting between me, another student and my tutor. Was nervous cause oh boy! Social contact. Either way; Not a good time but Ichimatsu made it better. It's also making me feel slightly better now because I'm feeling excluded atm, Not gonna go into it but I'm waaaa waaa.

But mwah Ichi cute ♡♡♡♡

[indigobluedreams]

I enjoy the idea of me and Ichimatsu just sorta vibin', Watching random shit. Like rn I'm re-watching ' Black summer '. I personally enjoyed it so I'm really excited for season two! I was upset that it was pushed back but I'm still excited for it. Also still need to watch Z nation since black summer is the ' prequel ' but eh.

That aside: I wanna vibe with Ichi on the sofa, Curl up under the blanket together and either talk shit about what dumb desicions characters made and how we'd do it more succesfully or how dumb it looks and make jokes. Honestly just having an all around good time. Like I bet we'd complain about the different turning speed or how no-one shot the woman when she was turning which caused everything to go to shit.

But I'd totally end up falling asleep on him depending on how I slept the night before, I keep zoning out then dozing off lately so it wouldn't be surprising. Plus he comfy ♡♡

[indigobluedreams]

I started watch the Osomatsu Franchise stuff after a friend recommended it. I wanted to understand it better so I watched it.

Now guess what? We're here. Wow.

Who expected this shit? Not me obviously 🤡

Either way now I fucking love Ichi! I just love him and just like. He's a vibe and I could go on about that NEET for hours. Mayhaps years but we'll see. All I know is mwah he's getting a kiss.

This is gonna be a long post,,, Whoopsies.

Either way, First of. My sona! They're a student studying abroad in Japan because it's known for it's 2d animation industry stuff. Ended up running into Ichimatsu on accident but we hit it off cause Yeah, Simillar view points and stuff we seem to enjoy. Eventually we started dating but he didn't say shit about his siblings ( Thought It'd ruin his chances but I'm a simp so of course it won't 😔 ), But one day he was valling me and we eere exchanging sweet nothings and Jyushi overheard, Started screaming and soon enough, They were all bothering Ichi about his " Secret lover " aka me 😳. Now we're friends and Ichi hates it but it's okay cause he get kisses to make it better ♡

I drew these shitty doodles cause I'm self indulgent. Did this when I was hating myself but it's all good now

Also, Last but not least and shit. New icon! Using this sm it's stupid rn. Like you can find it on my selfship Insta and everything jxhfhgg. Gonna use it here because okay: I think it's really really cute and Ichi looks SO fucking good. I wanna give him kiss,,,,,,

Why do I keep falling for sad guys who really love cats, this is twice fjdhdhf

Also since I haven't said it yet, Happy holidays everyone! I hope everyone a having a good December and whatever holiday your celebrating that it's been fun so far and only gets better!! If your celebrating none, That everything is going well for you and your having a good time!

[indigobluedreams]

Random selfship doodle shit I did today because I found time between college. Mostly just shitty scribbles. Planning on making refs of my sonas soon grrr. Proper images of them on main but when I'm done boy howdy.

ALSO might add some spesific homestuck/pesterquest characters I've been thinkin' bout 😔

[indigobluedreams]

sooooo. Not been online that much lately. Kinda went dark for a couple of months... haha. sorry about that, College just fucking ate my ass pretty much. I’ve been trying to focus on that and until recently, Didn’t really touch tumblr again. I’m trying to get back into it and make more time. Hopefully I can like, post here more regularly again. Since then. Kinda been silently adding to my f/o list because haha hyper fixations

Also note: I turned 19 while I was gone. Had a good b-day I guess, Mostly just vibed which is what I prefer over parties and shit. Anyhow, I hope everyone has been good while I’ve been gone! And Hopefully I can set up some sort of schedule and shit. I have a plan on getting a better schedule so I can get more free time.

[indigobluedreams]

Cute girl,,, Make icons for cute girl,,,

Debating whether I should selfship with her,,,,, or add her to my crush list,,,,,, cause not only is she cute but she's AMAZINGGG ♡♡♡♡♡

[indigobluedreams]

You ever just,,, Really wanna talk about a crush in a fandom. But the only problem is the moment you mention them, You know that someone is gonna make a big deal because most of the fandom seems like dislike them for mostly stupid reasons you think are shitty and don't want to get attacked for enjoying a character other people can't, But also respecting said other people's opinion.

That is me with the person I like in trigger happy havoc. Please send help, Not only is this killing me. But the lack of content.

[indigobluedreams]

I want to apologize if I don’t update my blog or respond to chats as much. I’m gonna be away for a week. I’m currently away with family in a house in the middle of the highlands. The house is,,, Kinda spooky,,, It’s old and my sibling keeps getting bad vibes. So y’know, Hopefully we don’t get possesed or something lmao. I also forgot my Tablet cable ( Thanks to my parents for rushing me grrrr ) so I’m hoping that somehow I’ll be able to get a hold of one.  But yeah,,, Hopefully this week is nice.