indyshotfirst

[indyshotfirst]

trickshxt‌:

“More ‘n you could know. Long as S.H.I.E.L.D.’s operatin’, I’m gonna need several drinks. Most of which I plan on consumin’ right here ‘n now. So you can either join me or move along…”

          Funny, he was fairly certain this guy was involved with SHIELD, and most of them were all piss and vinegar about anyone opposing the organization.  Indy himself was usually the cranky old geezer moaning about the government and secret organizations.  He was already interested.  “Yeah, I’ve got nothing going on right now, I’ll hang around.  You got a name, kid?”

[indyshotfirst]

trickshxt‌:

“You’re only allowed to overthrow the government if S.H.I.E.L.D. goes with.”

          “Not the government I was thinking of, personally.  You sound like you could use a drink.”

[indyshotfirst]

" i’ve just had a near death experience and i’m craving some lasagna. " - Hideko

          “Lasagna, huh?  Usually I want a cheeseburger after.”

[indyshotfirst]

critical role sentence starters !!!

so… we’ll talk later.

why won’t you stay down and die with dignity?

no. no further.

this is not over. it can’t be.

try not to have too much fun without us.

i have this blink candle. it’s formed from various animals that blink.

it’s so rare that we’re actually given the opportunity to be honest about everything. we might as well try it once and see if we like it.

you know i’m in love with you, right?

you seem… like a person. and that’s great.

those are coins! you’re not making it rain, you’re making it hail!

i’m killing someone, hold please.

your secret is safe with my indifference.

my heart is someone else’s.

do not go far from me. if we are out of earshot, you are too far from me.

um, i don’t know if it’s the food you made or the fact that we’re going to die tomorrow, but i want to kiss you.

i was all kinds of fucked up a few weeks ago.

you’re all kinds of fucked up all the time. we all are. and that’s why we’re together.

i just want to let you know… i am possibly the worst person you’ve ever met.

i think i kind of hope… not necessarily to hurt you or harm you, but i hope that one day… that you can know just how awful i can be.

you can curse, it’s okay. you killed one of us.

i think i’ve always been in love with the idea of you.

i was only gone for thirty seconds!

i encourage violence.

i can give you the means to protect them.

i do not want to die who i am. i’d like to live long enough to be someone else.

you’re on your own, fuckface.

a volcano is - is nature’s candle!

sometimes people go and they don’t come back.

do you spice?

so we’re going to kill everyone that we see in the next ten seconds.

i don’t want to be here if you’re not.

i told you before. no one kills you but me.

he traded his life!

i don’t have very many things that i care about and i don’t have anything that cares about me.

i’m great! well, not really, but i’m just going to pretend i’m happy so everybody can be okay!

i’ve been in a barrel for an hour. i fell asleep in there!

yes. i heard. it was the only thing i heard.

don’t cry. i’m just a little cold.

i bury my shame.

i should have told you. it’s yours.

forgiveness - that’s the key, isn’t it? it’s the only way to really grow.

your hair’s a mess. sit still.

you are my heart. you are me. you are my other half. you are welcome with me always.

you don’t always have to put on a brave face, dear.

we’re friends, right? are we friends?

i know we don’t always agree and i know i can be unkind, but… you know you’re family, right?

i’ve had a terrible thought. and it is sort of my business to have terrible thoughts.

take me instead.

we walk towards glory.

that’s mine! that’s mine!

did it choose me because i was broken, or did it break me?

please bring him back to me.

you think you care about me?

this was always supposed to happen, wasn’t it?

i love you. if i can find you, i will. if not, stay alive.

if he’s gone i won’t be the same.

i’d watch your moral panic all day, it’s delightful.

in many ways you are my total opposite. but you are also my best friend.

i made a choice. this is my family.

i forgive you. but i cannot let you leave.

please. please. i love him as much as you do.

fix him. fix him!

i like this family. i’d like to keep it.

i want you to know that you are like a brother to me.

talk about my sister again.

it’s been a while since we’ve had one of our depressing chats!

i can’t have you gone. i need you here.

i think we’re very broken people. but i think together we’re much greater than the sum of our parts.

don’t ever fucking do that again.

you didn’t die. but you did! but you didn’t. but you did! and then you didn’t.

i don’t want any of this! i don’t want any of this.

i’ve just had a near death experience and i’m craving some lasagna. 

you know, you’re getting weirder.

you and i are very different.

i’ve killed two of those who’ve wronged me and nothing is better. nothing feels better. nothing is avenged.

call me “child” one more goddamn time!

if you’re lucky, you die last.

some people have no sense of fucking honor!

i’ll take my clothes off if it’ll inspire us.

thank you for believing in me.

you’ve never done anything for me! never! you’ve never risked anything, you don’t know me!

everyone else believes in you. why shouldn’t you?

how many fingers am i holding up?

what’s the first letter of the alphabet? this you know.

yay! teamwork!

you fucking died!

don’t touch me right now! i’m not - don’t touch me!

i’m going to go get a sandwich.

you had us all very worried.

your reckless impulses will get you killed!

i’m done with gods. they will not help me. perhaps you will. 

this is too fucking much.

come here, you shithead.

it has been an honor.

screw you! i want my final words with you to be indignant and irritated.

you’re the face i saw when murder entered my heart.

i’m undecided about you.

never forget you’re my favorite. and i’m so sorry.

i’m not leaving him.

you’re a better man than you believe.

feel like making a home here?

you’re an idiot and i’m very proud of you. don’t do that again.

sound off if you’re alive.

it’s not going to work.

[indyshotfirst]

dapperfvck‌:

     “Y’a right cunt, y’know that?” John protested hotly. “Hope y’got a better plan under that hat o’yours, cos I ain’t got time t’be evoking shit, regardless o’how willin’ they might be t’help.”

          “Relax, I’ve always got a plan,” he half-lied.  Sometimes, ‘improvise’ was the plan, so that counted.  Sorta.  Besides, John was far too easy to rile up to resist.  “Keep your hocus pocus in that coat a’ yours, I’ll figure it out.”

[indyshotfirst]

dapperfvck‌:

    Jones really shouldn’t be worried and John would be highly insulted if he knew how little faith the other man in him. Honestly – You tell one story about knocking over a glass of whiskey onto a centuries old scroll he’d been researching and suddenly a bloke doesn’t trust you not to break an artifact by breathing on it.

    “Nah – You’re definitely the spiteful one. ‘S not like you ever let anything go.”

          “Just the fact that you’re here is proof I can let things go,” he pointed out, which was referencing the story about the whiskey spilled on the centuries old scroll, but regardless of how clumsy he thought Constantine might be, he had his own reasons for feeling the way he did.  Too many years on the job were most of them.

[indyshotfirst]

@dapperfvck just might be onto something...or maybe not

          “Do I look like the kind of man who dies?”

   “Mate – ‘m pretty sure y’alive outta spite.”

          “You’re not entirely off the mark,” he admitted absently, putting his attention more on the movement in the distance than John himself, but that was usual.  He still hadn’t decided if John was stupid enough to touch the wrong thing, so he didn’t watch him as closely as he probably should have, and he still didn’t think he was going to be able to back up all of that talk.  “I’m just not always the spiteful one.”

[indyshotfirst]

@dapperfvck probably isn’t anyone’s favorite upstairs

          ”Pick a god and pray.” 

   “Do y’honestly think any of ‘em would listen t’me?”

          “Probably not, but if they don’t wanna help you, maybe you’ll distract ‘em enough that they won’t take a shit on me for a few minutes.  Either way, can’t hurt our collective chances.”

[indyshotfirst]

reasons to love harrison ford

1. hates donald trump 2. got his ear pierced at claires because why not 3. legit asks people to beat him up in action scenes EVEN NOW AS AN OLD MAN 4. is arguably one of the most iconic star wars characters yet couldnt give less of a crap abt star wars 5. the universe tried to kill him (or at least permanently incapacitate him) twice in 2015 and it only mildly inconvenienced him 6. flies helicopters in search and rescue missions 7. was in his 40s for the majority of the indiana jones series which is insane when you think about all the stunts involved 8. quote “the director yells cut and harrison cracks open a beer and then builds a fucking shed” 9. arguably sexy 10. points angrily and its super effective

[indyshotfirst]

@johnconstantfine has a problem

           [text:Johnny Be Good] Stop texting me weird stuff so late at night. 

[ text @ Arizona Smith ]: Then stop being awake so late at night. [ text @ Arizona Smith ]: Wanker.

[text:Johnny Be Good] That’s not an excuse if you’re the one who woke me up.  

[indyshotfirst]

@johnconstantfine is finally telling the truth

           “ Why are you bleeding? ”

  “Force of habit?”

          “Yeah, I believe that.  Tissues on the desk.  Might have a bandaid in the top drawer.”

[indyshotfirst]

@johnconstantfine isn’t the only one who can sass

           “ Just how stupid do you think I am? ”

   “This is a trick question, an’ I don’t like it.”

           “Don’t strain yourself, it wasn’t a serious question. I just wanted to keep you distracted for a few minutes.”

[indyshotfirst]

johnconstantfine:

@indyshotfirst needs to clarify something

    “Y’keep sayin’ it belongs in a museum but wot fuckin’ museum is puttin’ the fetish of a goddess whose name no one bloody recalls on display?”

          “A private one that I trust more than I trust you with it.”

[indyshotfirst]

@johnconstantfine touched something

          “If that is what I think it is, so help me…”

  “Don’t think bout it, old son, jus’ run.”

          “What did you touch?  I said don’t touch anything!” he snapped, but he didn’t waste time grabbing the icon they’d come for, since it apparently didn’t matter how careful he was at this point.  He stuffed the artifact into his satchel at the same time that he scruffed John by the back of his coat to stop him from running right into the poison darts that hadn’t fired upon their entrance.  “Now, run, smartass.”

[indyshotfirst]

@johnconstantfine is far too paranoid

​          ❝ touch it. i dare you. ❞

  “ ‘M not gonna risk me fingers if it’s boobytrapped, ta.”

          “Relax, you’re useless to me without all ten of your fingers.  Well, maybe nine.  Eight?  Just pick it up and see what it says.”

[indyshotfirst]

@johnconstantfine has absolutely zero ability to be reassuring

          ❝ what is that sound? ❞

   “Hopefully jus’ the house settling’.”

          “Riiiiight, and you’d know if it was something supernatural about to kick our asses?”  Because if that was a ‘yes’, then that meant it was more likely something physical, which Indy preferred, but then also didn’t because he hadn’t sustained more than a few bruises so far, and he’d like to keep it that way.

[indyshotfirst]

@johnconstantfine should worry more about the trouble

           "You don't have that little voice that tells you when something's a bad idea, do you?"

   “So are we bein’ willfully glib or we a pot not very well acquainted with the kettle? Shall I arrange a formal introduction?”

          “Given the circumstances, I’m pretty sure the pot and the kettle are both on your side at the moment, so introductions can wait.  You got any slack over there?”