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[inspector-extraordinaire]

i don’t like it...and what’s this about a set, me ol’ mucker?

ok one random thing that episode did was make me realize they really should have some plants in the stationhouse. it would really brighten up the set.

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Does this damned contraption still work?

Can you lads still read this?

If you can, I need your advice on Margaret. She's driving me up the chuffing walls!

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Did Margaret burn down that gazebo?

What do you lads think?

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Bloody hell! I didn’t say bloody hell at all these past few days! What the bloody hell does it mean?!

Oh and good ole buggalugs is home free. Daft bastard.

Well at least some damn work will get done here again. Higgins is about as useful as tits on a bull.

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Well, it's been an eventful few days here at the old station house. Mostly it's all given me a massive headache. Especially Dr. Grace's shenanigans. Can't say I saw that one coming! With any luck she'll realize the error of her ways and get back on track, same as Charlie. If push comes to shove though, I will have to take action. I can't have that sort running my morgue. The mayor would have me sacked if he knew I knew and didn't do anything about it. And I still have a family to support. Can't risk it.

Hmm, maybe I can convince Higgins to take a go at Dr. Grace? I've seen the way he looks at her. The dolt.

Or maybe I should have Dr. Ogden try to talk some sense into her? Those two have always gotten along famously....in fact, they're a little too close for my liking. You don't think??? 

No, I'm sure I'm just being paranoid now.

This is turning into the Ava Moon fiasco all over again! I thought I was finally free of keeping secrets for my colleagues! Why can't they all just act proper and stop causing trouble!

Bloody hell, time for a drink!

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Aren't you the snarky one? As my wife tells me daily, 'Don't try to be clever, Thomas, it doesn't suit you.' Rest assured I've got my eye on you lad. You and Higgins that is.

So we’re all agreed that my Bobby would have knocked that Simon boys head off…right, Higgins?

And I could certainly have taken bugalugs. Isn’t that right, lads?….why aren’t you answering me!?!?

[inspector-extraordinaire]

So we're all agreed that my Bobby would have knocked that Simon boys head off...right, Higgins?

And I could certainly have taken bugalugs. Isn't that right, lads?....why aren't you answering me!?!?

[inspector-extraordinaire]

You're damn right I don't approve! What were you thinking lad suggesting such a thing! Bloody Micks! They're all so bloody stroppy! There's no reasoning with the lot about ANYTHING! They're as pig headed as Margaret!...Breathe a word of that to her and you're fired!

What's that? You don't work for the constabulary? Well, what the chuffing hell are you reading a copper's journal for then?

Any suggestions of which whiskey’s I should buy with my 15 dollars?

For some reason I was thinking Eagle’s Flight….bugger if I know why.

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Any suggestions of which whiskey's I should buy with my 15 dollars?

For some reason I was thinking Eagle's Flight....bugger if I know why.

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Chuffing hell! Can't a man go quietly fishing with his sons?! Why do those bastards have to die everywhere I go?!

Crabtree would say I was cursed...but that's bollocks! There must be a rational reason and I intend to find out! But not until after this tumbler of scotch.

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Well, sir, if she's a fan of fine literature, I would be glad to sell you a copy of my book Curse of the Lost Pharaohs...

I've already got a bloody copy signed by Crabtree himself! And son, if you think that piece of claptrap is fine literature, you should really stop reading.

[inspector-extraordinaire]

I'm sure Margaret would be pleased with any small gesture, Inspector. The promise of a night out in the future, some flowers...?

Hmm, I suppose I could suffer through another night of that bloody vaudeville. Bugger if I know why Margaret loves that form of unrefined entertainment. It's got nothing on the grand temptress that is Opera.

But I'm not getting her roses! They're too damned dear. Maybe red tulips though...

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Bloody hell! I can see several of you bloody bastards have liked my pain...but what I would really like are some goddamn gift suggestions!

After those last few bottles of whiskey and boxes of cigars, I don't have enough money for anything expensive like jewelry...

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Bloody hell!

BLOODY HELL!

BLoOOOoooOOOdY hEeeeeLL!!!

I forgot to get a Christmas present for Margaret!!! The last time I did that she wouldn't let me sleep in our bed for a week! And a man has certain appetites, dammit!

Hurry lads! Give me suggestions! I'm plum fresh out of ideas!

[inspector-extraordinaire]

Good God man! That's NOT what I meant by wearing the trousers!!

[inspector-extraordinaire]

I've just heard from the Mayor that the doctor has dropped out of the election. Glad to see Murdoch finally wearing the trousers in the relationship.

Poor bloke. He won't be enjoying marital bliss for awhile! Serves him right! He should have laid down the law a long time ago! Women will get up to all sorts of nonsense if we don't keep them in their place! It's bloody exhausting is what it is! Why can't they just stay in the kitchen?!

[inspector-extraordinaire]

What the bloody hell is this?!!?! You've made me to look the fool!!!

Murdoch Mysteries + Christmas 4/?