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I want to own a house and have a garden in the back and a fruit tree in front and I want to tell the neighborhood kids that they can come pick the fruits when they want as long as they leave some for others, and I want to host dinners for friends and make too much food and make everyone go home with some leftovers, and I want to grow vegetables in my garden and beg my neighbors to take all this zucchini off my hands or I'll have to eat zucchini for every meal for the next few months, and I want to give and feed and love but I need more goddamn money first

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“True happiness comes only by making others happy.”

— David O. Mckay

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Blame it on the goalie weirdness, i guess?

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Personality test, is 80f/26c too hot for you?

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first 5 faceless emojis are how your summers gonna go

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LOU FERRIGNO JR as JOSH A PLACE CALLED HOLLYWOOD - 1x01

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anyway. id like that player more if i had to hear about him less.

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What’s a food from your culture that u HATE #hatersonly

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What would you guys consider the worst movie you've ever seen? Not something that's fun to make fun of, nothing you ironically enjoyed, I mean just an absolutely miserable moviegoing experience that you paid for, hated every second, and wish you had walked out of and asked for a refund.

For me, no joke, Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted. It did not even feel like a real movie to me. It made me see red! I was SEETHING with anger and annoyance throughout the entire thing, and I cannot for the life of me articulate why. I saw it once in 2012 when I was 15, I remember almost nothing about it now, but it struck a nerve with me like no other movie ever has before or since.

Tell me in the tags, which movie makes you disproportionately angry just thinking about it?

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What’s your fantasy?

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on the 11th day of christmas my mutual gave to me softcore middle aged man pornography

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yappin'

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Hot Take: Check Please doesn’t deconstruct toxic masculinity in hockey, it applauds it.

Zimbits as MLM Comphet

Bitty perfectly slots into traditional housewife role, with enough “boys can be feminine” + “contempt for women / women can only exist in this ethereal heavenly state of godhood (see: Beyoncé)” flavor that I’m convinced we have a case of fujoshi self-insert genderflip on our hands.

The whole premise of “hockey player likes baking” is consistently played for laughs. People liking Bitty’s baking, a trait the comic frames as feminine, is portrayed as a humbling and emasculating experience, and a constant punchline throughout all four years.

Women in Check Please can only exist if they’re “one of the guys”

Lardo is called by a derogatory (and frankly racist) nickname and is the bossy team manager who is framed as being cool only by virtue of being masc. From the moment she’s introduced, her whole thing is that she is “the manliest bro – who happens to be a woman”.

Foxtrot proves her character worth the moment she demonstrates that she can yell loudly and run a tight ship and be dominant with the guys. And that’s kind of it.

George has a masc nickname, and that’s her character.

Even so, all major women characters only ever appear in subservient roles to men, never being equals. All of them are PoC, too, which is an even worse look.

Women in Check Please can only exist if they’re not like other girls or effeminate gay men.

Bitty is also not like other girls

Bitty is consistently portrayed as inherently unique and special by the lone virtue of being queer, despite being at a school where supposedly one in four students is queer. Outside of Bitty and three “twist” queer characters, everyone is neatly heteronormative (even characters like Lardo, who are afforded no femininity in their personality, are paired up neatly into a cis-hetero couple).

In Year 4, we briefly see Bitty argue with the other varsity captains over who has the gayest team. This too, is never elaborated on, conserving Bitty’s status as being unique as a queer person at Samwell.

What follows then is a facade of a queer narrative, in which the cisheteronormativity of the setting can comfortably continue to exist without being disturbed by the presence of queer characters. What it pretends to do is infuse the narrative with queerness; what it really does is dress up a cisheteronormative narrative in pride colors and call it progressive.

Trans people don’t exist

Despite being at a school where supposedly one in four students is queer.

That’s it, that’s my point.

The closest you get to any transness is how the above-mentioned female characters can only persist in the narrative by adapting to the men’s behavior, something they are applauded for, for not being appalled by.

Jack’s abuse gets brushed over

The moment he shows softness towards Bitty, all of Year 1 is forgiven and forgotten.

Dude yelled at the main character and made him wanna quit hockey, when Parse comes to Samwell, Shitty points out that even compared to his “usual bitchiness” (which Shitty also excuses, btw) the way Jack treated Parse scared him. This is later both retconned and justified by the narrative (see 4.19).

Kent Parson Can’t Have Feelings

He can only exist in the story to be an obstacle to Jack, any and all of his raw outbursts are framed as him being petty and bratty. Any deeper sensitivities he might have are framed as weaknesses (being closeted in the NHL, still having feelings for Jack).

His “redemption” consists of Bitty one-upping him. When he comes to Samwell to talk to Bitty, he is only there to be humbled for what he did wrong (having complex emotions he wasn’t able to express calmly). Bitty is portrayed as the hero for emasculating him (making him like his pie) and that humbles him into submission.

Whiskey’s closet story

Both Jack and Whiskey are set up as stoic, masc and talented at hockey, so the reveal that they are queer is played as a big twist in both instances. Despite the comic banking on the premise that “yes, you can be a queer man and play hockey”, here are two instances where the comic betrays its own premise. (Three if you count Parse.)

Whiskey, like Parse, is not afforded any internal emotionality. His demeanor is portrayed as cowardly and duplicitous for not wanting to be out and proud like Bitty, and his closed-offness is, by virtue of the comic being told through Bitty’s lens, framed as disdain. He, like Parse, is framed as a villain because he has feelings.

Misc: 

The infantilization of Chowder. Chowder is constantly referred to as Bitty’s baby boy, by virtue of his somewhat-clueless outward demeanor, and being Asian.

The hazing. I didn’t think I would have to go into this, but apparently people love to downplay the fact that Bitty bullying the rookies in his senior year is not only questionable at best, but also illegal.

Bitty has no political stance despite being queer. His parents are most likely Republican, which is never addressed; he never unpacks his Christian upbringing, despite being queer in a traditional Christian family, and when confronted with the fact that Dex might be Republican, he frames Nursey as the one being silly for bringing up this conflict.

Shitty’s performative liberalism. Shitty plays into the stoner hippie archetype by flinging about a bunch of feminist theory, but is never actually shown actively doing anything to deconstruct the environment of college hockey. When Jack flies off the handle at Bitty, he excuses it. When Jack refuses to partake in hazing (likely because of his addiction?) he calls him a wimp.

I don’t count Farmer as a major character because she appears in two panels and has no speaking parts, but she, too, falls into the “just one of the guys” category.

Anon I love you and you are CORRECT.

Adding to the Zimbits as Comphet point: Bitty says his mother is his best friend yet we know next to nothing about her aside from her homemaking skills. According to a tweet (so not actually canon) she does have a job but we never know what it is. And we see time and time again Bitty belittle his mother's recipes or brush off her hurt and concern (such as when she thought it was her jam recipe Bitty was sharing with NHL players). It's played for laughs in the comic but just makes Bitty look selfish, entitled, and self-centered (oh wait, that's what he is). Bitty never acknowledges his own bad behavior because he lives in the mentality of once a victim always a victim. Which, I would argue, Jack begins to fall into as well the deeper his relationship with Bitty gets.

Which we're not even going to get into Bitty's vlog and twitter where he took private conversations and blasted them to the public. Because the internet is public.

Also the fact that Bitty, despite not being out until Samwell, manages to out all three other queer characters in the comic, either through his vlog or vague (not very well) posting on his twitter: Jack, Kent, and Whiskey. And isn't that telling that not even in this supposed queer comic are 1 in 4 characters queer. I'm talking canon, not fanon. The actual canon.

Great ask/post anon!

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Quick what are you doing RIGHT now (besides scrolling Tumblr)