isleepsoidonthavetolive - Tumblr blog

[isleepsoidonthavetolive]

Nobody is complimenting me unless I ask for it or degrade myself. I say I feel like a piece of shit and the only thing I receive is "lol same". I fail at something and I get no help, "just do better". I always fail when I try to do something. I always do everything wrong. I guess I'll never be successful. It's okay, because even if I succeed at something, I know I'll not feel anything. I'm fcking empty, I can't feel a thing. But anger. I feel so much anger. The anger I didn't want to let go, either way I would have gotten into some troubles. What the point in telling someone what's happening? I've already did and got nothing. I have to help myself on my own. I have to motivate myself, be proud of myself, push myself... But what if I can't do that anymore? What if even if I have dreams, it doesn't motivate me? It was better until now. It's always like this. I think I'm doing better until I realize I'm just running away from reality. I just daydream everyday and imagine things the way I would like them to be. And it makes me happy, but it's not real, and it's never going to be. I needed to vent, sorry for those who read this. It's as useless as I am.