itsbenedict

[itsbenedict]

A team of seven was sent to capture the princess. It was a dirty move in what was sure to be a dirty war, but the princess was near the frontlines, and their spies had learned there was a small chance that she could be snatched. When one or the other side sued for peace, she would be an important bargaining chip, if she wasn't simply ransomed.

In spite of encountering next to no resistance, three of the seven men died during the mission. One was kicked by a horse when it spooked, another fell during their race through the woods and snapped his neck, and the third was shot with a crossbow when they returned to their side of the war, a case a friendly fire.

The princess had been utterly impassive through all of it, from the very moment they'd yanked her from her carriage. She had shown no expression on her face when they'd gagged her. She hadn't so much as flinched when a man fell to the ground with a crossbow bolt in his neck.

She'd been placed under armed guard in one of the tents, then the next day, brought further into the kingdom, away from the war and to the seat of power.

The same man who'd been in charge of the team who had taken her, Kipling, had accompanied the wagon to the castle to give his report.

Kipling watched as one of the guards keeled over for no discernable reason. They had stopped and tried to revive him, but there was no gleam of life in his eyes and no pulse in his veins.

The princess had watched, not seeming to find it interesting.

Kipling didn't mention the deaths in his report to the king. They made his team seem incompetent. He didn't mention that another of his team had died of food poisoning the morning before the princess left camp. He did mention that he would need to recruit more people, and that the princess had been behaving oddly.

Later that night, having washed his hands of the princess, he went to a tavern to drink himself stupid. He passed out in an alley on his way home, and when someone tried to steal the shoes off his feet, he made to fight back and got a knife in the stomach for his trouble. He wasn't identified until much later, at which point a pattern was becoming very clear.

[itsbenedict]

Drew this for Make a Terrible Comic Day 2025.

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[itsbenedict]

a pixel art commission

[itsbenedict]

Inspired by this post by Nostalgebraist, posting again so it can be reblogged without directly dumping a wall of text onto your dash. You should definitely read their write-up of the situation if you haven't already, it's absolutely fascinating.

[itsbenedict]

i like the funny tv guy

[itsbenedict]

Hears like seven seconds of your fight theme but I’m overleveled as fuck and I don’t even let the introductory crescendo finish before thrashing you and pilfering you for loot. and quicksaves before your corpse is done despawning

[itsbenedict]

at work: attempt to make some calls to the client’s API that they might not have given us the right creds for

finish OC roulette piece

guitar practice

kanji flashcards

figure out washing machine problem solving procedure

implement dark scene

hahaha i don't even know if they gave us the right creds because the version of the API that just takes an API key and a username and a password for auth is outdated, and there's a newer version of the API that also wants a client ID and secret, which was not updated on the root page of the public documentation so i only found out just now. and our contact with them is out until the end of next week. awesome. what a poorly documented piece of shit this API is.

[itsbenedict]

#sometimes you meet a dog and that dog is also god #many such cases #at least this one isn't radioa- #wait a second it totally is

Happy let Papyrus say fuck day!

[itsbenedict]

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[itsbenedict]

Humorous : Paul Revere :: Humongous : Paul Revenge

[itsbenedict]

at work: attempt to make some calls to the client's API that they might not have given us the right creds for

finish OC roulette piece

guitar practice

kanji flashcards

figure out washing machine problem solving procedure

implement dark scene

[itsbenedict]

The Medical Doctor / Nurse Coloring Page ‘Electric Crayon: Super Mario Bros & Friends: When I Grow Up’ DOS PC