itsdeepsaini

[itsdeepsaini]

attempts were made. this was fun???

[itsdeepsaini]

You know, it's tempting but I might have to pass. It sounds painful-- to watch, I mean. The secondhand embarrassment is bad enough thinking about it. But that's a very kind offer; I appreciate it. 

Thank you, thank you. Want me to repeat it for you? Perhaps while waving and smiling as if I was in a beauty pageant?

[itsdeepsaini]

"You're trying to use logic in this place? This place doesn't listen to it. Trust me, I've tried." A pause and then tackedon a mumbled, "Still trying, actually." Deep shot a glance at the bloody knee and grimaced; blood had always made him a bit queasy. "You okay? Quite a spectacular fall you had there," he asked as he offered a hand to help him up.

"Fuck," he mumbled, while sitting on the hard gravel. Stacy grabbed his knee, not yet moving his hand away from what he knew was going to be sore. But he breathed in, and took his hand away, blood on his hand and a good scrape on his knee, visible through the well placed tear that had actually already been there. "You’d think being dead would mean no blood," he said, talking to no one, anyone, and looking up as he did.

[itsdeepsaini]

Sounds great now, but I don't know... what happens if you miss it? It's not growing back, so you'd end up being a crazy woman staring longingly at the house and muttering under your breath about how it's a part of you. Once you're down that path, there's no going back. 

"Oh, it’s fine! Lucy can figure it out, I guess. No broken bones, only dusty hair and a shattered ego. You know, this bloody situation with my hair has gotten so bad, I’m actually thinking of cutting it all off and giving it to some family to use as insulation for their house."

[itsdeepsaini]

 I applauding you for your grace and finesse. It's an inspiration to us all.

If I look bad you should see what happened to the other guy… and when I mean guy I mean bush. I fell into a bush. But I’m okay, no worries.

[itsdeepsaini]

[itsdeepsaini]

"That doesn't look anywhere near minor. I thought you were going grewy for a moment there. My condolences are with you; I've felt that pain when it comes to hair."

"There was a minor incident with a step-ladder and ludicrous amounts of CD boxes. It’s going to take hours to get the dust out of my hair."

[itsdeepsaini]

"You could always get a sandwich yourself, you know? I'm pretty sure you don't need me to hold your hand and walk you over to your kitchen."

"Aw, how sweet of you. I'm sure people appreciate it."

"Well, if I had a sandwich I wouldn’t be talking, or hungry. So I suggest you help me locate a sandwich. I think that kind of solution to this quandary could be mutually beneficial for us."

"Yes. I’m quite good at being the catalyst to mental breakdowns. In fact that’s my over arching profession. I’m like a backwards version of a psychiatrist." 

[itsdeepsaini]

"You say will. I thought you hadn't decided to do it yet? As for me, eh, I'll figure it out if we get there. If not then oh well, I guess that's that. "

"You will know how I managed when the door legions take over this karmic existence with their impartial hinges and negative attitudes."

"I suggest you consider this a bit more than you have. When they are done with me, I don’t doubt they will come for you as well. You should be panicking right now."

[itsdeepsaini]

Wednesday, actually. Tch, it's like you don't know me at all. Also, there's no Cherry Garcia in your freezer. I knicked it last time I was over. You don't need it anyway. Eh, well good luck getting CDs. I guess we could pull up a few of my students and have them sing for us. Being dead is so difficult.

Great idea! Then I can have an excuse to kick your ass.

So your usual Friday night routine then? I lost my pet, not my marriage. I’m sure I’ll find him eventually. I probably shouldn’t stuff myself with Cherry Garcia if I know I’m gonna end up chasing after his shifty ass. I’m still up for a jam session though, not gonna lie.

Great idea! I’ll pop up in the middle of the night and start slapping you, going 'Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?' 

[itsdeepsaini]

"I have considered it, though thanks, I appreciate it. You realize I've had each of these crises about 5 times over already, right? Except for the sandwich. That's new." 

"Have you given anyone a breakdown with all these questions yet?"

"Have you considered the headache is in your imagination and doesn’t actually exist? Have you considered that this is all a dream that you are constructing from your thoughts? Have you considered that I am the product of you imagination and that my giving you a headache is a choice?"

"Maybe the power to be fine is yours and just and a matter of choice. What if you just took a moment to dream a whole other reality?

What if I had a sandwich?”

[itsdeepsaini]

"...Right. Well if you do decide to punch the door, let me know how it turns ou.t"

"Yes, but then I would be running everywhere and have no time for myself. That just isn’t how I manage to go about my business. I need me time. Not me plus a myriad of doors time. It’s why my relationships never work."

[itsdeepsaini]

"Well the headache's worse, thanks, but I'll deal with being not fine." 

"Are you fine though? I’m pretty sure you said you had a migraine and a broken bicycle. That doesn’t sound fine." 

[itsdeepsaini]

"Well why not? Might as well go for it."

"Yes, but what if its door posse gets aggravated by my assault, and they put a hit out on me? Imagine that, me getting chased about by aggrieved doors. That would be rather exhausting." 

[itsdeepsaini]

"Correction. It presents you with a greater dilema. I'm perfectly fine here. "

  "But like, what even is sanity even? Why are we so desperate to maintain sanity? What if being more or less insane is more fun? What if all the sane people are actually insane, and all the insane people are the sane ones? Your assertion just presents us with an even greater dilemma." 

[itsdeepsaini]

"Go punch it. That might help. Maybe it'll learn its lesson and won't do it again next time."

"As previously mentioned, I don’t have much control over my limbs, so I imagine the concept of objects falling into me are in no way surprising. 

Well, that bastard of a door just sort of came out of nowhere. As far as doors go, it was a real prick.”