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[ivy--cole-blog]

She shakes her head, before laying it o the other chest, “Don’t do that.. you couldn’t just be there, we where all pulled somewhere else” Despite how lousy she felt, she didn’t want Isis to feel anything, let along guilt for this situation. It had been a horrible one, a horrible situation. Lives had been lost, and hurt. But it was far from her fault. “You’re here now, you’re here now with me” she adds, quietly.  She tightens her grip around her, burying her face into her chest, his fingers tightening on her jacket as she hold onto her. She’s afraid to close her eyes, not wanting to see that poor girl bleeding to death in front of her. But her eyes close anyways, because how soothing Isis is against her. The pop back up, as she tenses in the hold, but doesn’t let go - “You’re here now” she whispers against, her entire body shivering under her, not wanting to let go. “I just .. wish I could not see it anymore” 

I should have been there. It was the only thought currently running through her mind. She should have been with Ivy, the one person that she had always sworn to protect, but she had gone and made herself an easy target by getting high and drunk and had been unable to play her part as guardian. Drugs and alcohol were two things that had gone against her training as a guardian, and because of her decisions, she’d failed Ivy. She’d failed another person she was supposed to be there for. And it was worse because it was Ivy. As Ivy leaned into her, Isis’ arms instinctively wrapped around her, pulling her tighter against her chest. “Shh, I know, I know, I’m so sorry you had to see that,” she whispered the words, pressing her lips against the top of Ivy’s head. “I should have been with you. I’m sorry I wasn’t, but I’m here now, okay? And you don’t have to be alone right now. I’m not gonna leave you alone, I promise.” 

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She had to look around herself, looking around the room and making sure. She nodded her head, before looking back at the other, “She was there though, just laying there.. and..” she went quiet, not wanting to go into details. Not wanting to relive those details. She nods her head, understanding her. But she wasn’t sure she would be able to, not after what had just happened -- and so soon after the other one that night before. “I don’t think I can..” She admits quietly, “Sleeping hasn’t been easy this week.. it’s so hard” she didn’t want to burden another person with this, it was the last thing she wanted to do. But she couldn’t just sit there and lie about it either. 

“There’s no one else here, okay?” She searched the other’s gaze, attempting to reassure her that they were the only two in the room. “Just me. It was only a bad dream.” Or maybe it had been a nightmare. Alexsiya wasn’t aware of what everyone had suffered at the bonfire– she had been fortunate enough to miss out on it. “I can’t claim to know what happened to you, but I think you’re suffering from a case of post traumatic stress disorder— and as impossible as it may seem, you need to sleep.” The mistake she had made when suffering from PTSD after the murder of her daughter had been not sleeping– it had only managed to make her crazier. 

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Her assurance was enough to calm Ivy down.  Lux had a way of doing that. It was probably because the other knew more about her then she did herself sometimes. Wrapping her fingers around her cousin’s hand, she gave it a squeeze, “I know, I know” she says now, nodding her head, as she placed her other hand under her head, “I wish I had gotten her quicker either way” She admits quietly. She breaths out quietly, “No, it’s okay. I’ll be okay.. I mean it could be worse” she kisses her cousin forehead, giving her a small smile, “I’m just glad you’re okay” it was the most important out of everything to her, right now. 

Seeing Ivy and feeling her body sprawled out beside her own was enough to make Lux breath a deep sigh of relief. Tension melted from her body as she curled protectively next to her cousin. “Hey. Don’t even worry about that,” Lux objected when Ivy mentioned coming sooner. Her being there now was really all Lux needed. They were safe. People had died but her best friend was here at her side right where she belonged. Carefully she laid her arm over her cousin’s middle and pulled her just a bit closer. “I’m sorry you went through that. I wish it would’ve been me. But you’ll get through it. I’ll make sure of that.”

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She looks around the sofa, before looking back at the blond “Am I in your way or?” she asks quietly, before running her fingers through her hair, to shake off her nightmare. “I just.. I hadn't mean to fall asleep” 

       “Are you really just going to lay there?” Amelia asked knowing that her tone could’ve been softer if she had wanted it to be but clearly manners was something that had left the building when it came to her. Especially right now, 

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“I’m as fine as I can be right now” she lied. It just wasn’t something she wanted to get into, or even bring up. “That’s a good thing” she offers him another weak smile. “Need someone like that.. mostly a lot” 

“Okay. I’m glad you are alright,” He lifted his head and returned a small smile. “I’m always here to help… or if something isn’t right.”

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Upon hearing Isis’s voice, she quickly looked at her. “She was laying just there” she say snow, looking around the other to the floor. But nothing was there, she had been right. It had been a dream -- or more like a nightmare. She could not stop seeing Athena’s body. It was like this would be forever her curse.  Tears stung at her eyes, as her hands reached for hers, “She was just laying there and I can’t stop seeing it, Is, I can’t stop seeing her” she leaned forward, before pulling the other to her, so she could wrap herself inside her arms, and not let go. 

Isis hadn’t heard from Ivy since before what had happened during the bonfire. Not knowing where the other had been during the whole ordeal– or whether she was even alive– had her worried, especially because it wouldn’t have been the first time a charge had died on her watch. And all because she had been wasted out of her wits. The first chance she got, she started searching through the dorms. Instinct kicked in when she heard the scream, and when she realized who it was coming from, she immediately sprinted inside, kneeling in front of the couch and gently clutching Ivy’s arms, moving her hands along them soothingly. “Hey, shh,” she whispered, gaze meeting Ivy’s directly. “Whatever it was, it was just a dream. You’re awake. And I’m here. Nothing’s going to hurt you.” She didn’t know what had happened to Ivy that night and she was afraid to ask, but all she knew was that she should have been with her… not tied to a rope somewhere. 

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“It’s alright -- I mean everything is okay” She offers him a weak smile. “It’s good to have someone you know, ready to go at the last minute”

“I’m.. sorry. Sometimes I just jump the gun.”

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Ivy felt herself tense, but she relaxed instantly, when she heard her by her side -- “I.. there was something there, a body” she says now, tears tinging her eyes. Sitting up quickly, she looked at the other, breathing hard. No one was there, but the other girl next to her. This why she couldn’t sleep, this was why she couldn’t try, “I . know” she says now, “I was sleeping.. though I shouldn’t of been” she admits, looking around the room. Everything was exactly the same.  It had been a nightmare. 

While recent events in her life had shaken her to her very core and she had taken a break from the job that she had lived and breathed since her mid-twenties, Alexsiya couldn’t force herself to not run in the opposite direction of the screams. “Hey, you’re alright,” she cooed, her instincts fully kicking in as she knelt in front of the brunette. “I’m a detective— or I was a detective, anyway…. I’m not going to hurt you. I promise.” 

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Ivy had been going around in circles.  His mind raced with everything that had happened this week -- and her eyes hur from the crying.  She couldn’t hardly stand on her two feet without wanting to fall over.  She was tired, exhausted.  Laying onto one of the couches in one of the dorm rooms.  She tucked her feet under herself. She closed her eyes for a few moments -- which she thought had been just that, a few minutes. Before she woke up, heavy breathing and a low scream coming from her. She wasn’t sure she’d ever sleep again.

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When Ivy had found her cousin, she hadn’t wasted any time crawling into her bed, and pulling the sheet up over his head.  The entire night she had spent most of it, sitting in the corner of her dorm room, playing the night over and over. She hadn't left her room for the entire night -- afraid that something else would happen.  Seeing Athena like she had found her the other night had fucked her up.  Her mind was nothing but thoughts about it.  And then when she had found out that Lux had gotten hurt, that hadn't made things any better.  She peered at her cousin, "I am so glad you are okay" She says quietly, before laying her head back "I would of come sooner -- but, god, Lux I can't stop seeing her" 

“Well that whole young and good looking thing didn’t last very long.”

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“I’m okay -- I sort of just wanted to sit here” she admits quietly. 

“I’m going to get you— just hold on.”

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“You seem alright to me? Are you alright?” she asks now, leading and inspecting her. She seemed okay to her. Maybe she had drank to much, had she? Giving her a small look, she laughed, “No, god no, not dick sizes, my legs” she says now, looking down at her own, “You said they where long, is it a good or bad long?” she found herself laughing again, because of the fact the other had said dick, or maybe it was because she was drunk -- but it had just sounded so funny to her. 

       “Yeah! You know the one that goes on and on and on – that one. Have you never seriously heard of that bunny?” Eliza had always been a sunshine during university, a strict uptight sunshine but a sunshine nonetheless – that all managed to just vanish into thin air when the curse got casted on her. “Maybe you can tell me how i am and then I can tell you how you are and then it will all make sense – we can be each others mirrors for the night – how does that sound like? I think it’s a really good idea – I’m sorry but what the hell were we talking about good long or bad long – dick sizes?”