jaemanon

[jaemanon]

"missed you <3" na jaemin × fem.reader ☆ nsfw

w/ unprotected sex, filthy shit

friday night. alone. tv playing some random shit in the background. sounds perfect right? wrong.

he was missing.

his absence was visible in every aspect. you've been going with it for a few days now. it's not that he never comes home; it's the unsuitable schedule that's coming between you two. coming home and not seeing him, while for him it's the sight of you in deep slumber that greets him. seemed like an unending cycle.

maybe tonight you might get the chance to see him; much more effective than just hearing his voice over the phone which doesn't even deliver the natural sound like it needs to.

a few more minutes pass of aimlessly browsing from web to web, until your eyes started to give up due to the pressure of being kept open far from their usual mastered limit. sooner than expected, you were passed out on the living room couch; blanket over waist and pillow between your arms.

as if on cue, the code to the entrance door echoed throughout the poorly lit apartment, indicating his arrival. his movements quieter than usual, knowing that by now you'd be sleeping; which you were.

he was setting down everything he had with himself, and was making himself as comfortable as he needed to fulfill max relaxation. when turning to place the mint hoodie on the couch, he saw you griping his white clothed pillow. a soft smile sat on his lips prettily as he witnessed your tight grip on it.

he called your name maybe once or twice in a weak attempt to wake you up bcus deep down he had no intention to but the selfish need to allocate a fun time with you, captured him strongly tonight, as it seems.

when your drowsy eyes met his buoyant ones, he swore his heart swelled in joy. his hand immediately came in contact with your flushed cheek, while offering an endearing eye smile.

"did you wait long, baby?"

you shook your head sideways. he crunched down to give you a small peck before informing that he was going to take a shower. you took it as a sign to tuck yourself on his bed.

steam captivated the room as the bathroom door opened, indicating that he was done with his shower. revealing himself with nothing but shorts and a towel wrapped around his neck, jaemin walked towards the bed too distracted with his hair to see that you had wore the shirt he had planned to wear to sleep.

he weakly smiled when seeing the fabric loosely fitting your body.

"it looks better on you."

when hearing his words, you transferred your attention from your phone towards him. glancing up at him you couldn't help but mirror his smile as he slowly moved up to your side. as soon as your eyes met, he tug you close and caressed your hair tenderly.

hardly any minute passed by with the conversation you were trying to hold, when jaemin rammed his lips on yours with no warning. you could feel his wide smile against your parted rim, giving away the satisfaction he felt of finally getting to properly kiss you.

setting a mild grip around his neck, you started to imitate the kiss he was offering. you could feel his hands starting to roam your every curve. he maneuvered your body on top of his, while the other hand sneaked up to your jaw, helping with a faint force to tilt your head to the side.

upon feeling his cold fingers dance across your waist, you whimpered inaudibly but due to the proximity, he heard it, which caused him to detach his lips from yours and look in your eyes, offering a lazy smile as he did so. his greed became apparent when he started peeling off every clothing you had on, and the kisses he was leaving down your neck transformed into pitiless sucking on the soft skin.

leaving you laying bare on the bed, jaemin got up and went towards the side of the bed, pulling out a condom and turned to you while removing his last piece of clothing. he gazed up and down your body, mentally capturing the moment for the innumerable time. he always got drunk with this feeling; being able to be the one who you collide with, the one who brings bliss all over your body, the one who you bathe in ecstasy with. it messes with his head.

your voice cuts him off of his sinister world, thinking of every twisted way he wanted to have you.

"jaem,, can we try without it tonight?" - your question lingered on the air as you gestured to the condom on his hand, peaking from the scruffily ripped packaging.

his face twisted into an atrocious smile, head by now filled with ill intentions on having you raw. the room was injected with keenness , so much that you could practically hear him smile through his breath.

"are you sure, baby?"

when you nodded your head, still looking up at him as he climbed on top of you, he shook his head softly and delivered his words close to your lips, whilst throwing the condom to the floor.

“god, you never fail to surprise me.”

chuckling, he cupped your cheek and planted sweet pecks as he adjusted himself between your warm thighs. your hands found his chest and slid down, mapping their way along his torso.

shock stung you into a quivering mass of pleasure when he captured one of your hands and fed it down to the thickness of his dick, then urged you to stroke it between your legs.

sweet words coated with needy moans coming from jaemin filled your ears, making your head dizzy with relish. he looked so cute like this; droplets of sweat already forming on his temples, mouth agape, eyes slightly opened, eyebrows furrowed due to filthy strokes he was receiving on his cock, hand gripping the sheets besides your head while the other held your cheek still.

moments later, he took your hand gently causing you to halt movements, and intertwined with his while softheartedly planting a kiss on yours. he looked at you sickly in love, before entering you slowly. a loud gasp ripped from your throat, mirroring the waves of shock you felt.

jaemin seemed eager to sample your moans, as he lowly released a whine. he went feral with the realization that he could actually feel you. being wrapped in a web of warmness sent him over cloud nine. he could die happy now.

he captured your lower lip, sucking softly in attempt to silent his groans. the way you whimpered and gasped into his mouth, sent licks of heat over his skin. his hips started to move steadily, causing him to let go and look at you. his hard thighs crowned your hips with now more force, having witness the change in your facial expression. bliss was spilling from your face to your body, reaching out to jaemin and tenderly assaulting his hair with slight pressure.

his lips sailed down to your neck, kissing the slender column of your throat, where he had previously created a mess of marks. it had him crazy; leaving one or two marks on a part of your body only he could see and seeing them the next morning, giving him the thrill when remembering last night's wild doings.

cries spilled from both your lips as brutal euphoria gripped your head, making it hard to focus on anything else than the way jaemin was fucking you deliciously raw. his kisses reached your chest, covering every part of flesh with faint coat of saliva. when he licked one of your tits, you arched your back to better accept his bold caress of his tongue. an amused whiny chuckle left his mouth as he sensed your greed.

"love it when you get needy with me angel, showing me u want me like i want you."

beckoning his name like a siren’s song only seemed to rile him up even more. your knees clamped his naked hips as he bore down between your thighs, each time faster than the last.

"moan like that for me baby, show nana how good he makes you feel."

shortly after he said that, your moans overfilled the room, knowing for sure that the neighbors could hear too, but you couldn't bring yourself to care much. jaemin loved seeing you lose it all when reaching your high. tears streamed down your face, jaw opened; leaking pretty sounds just for him, nails clenched tightly on his back, and eyes rolled back accompanied by your arched back. he thought you looked prettiest like this, all wasted and dirty (only with him).

"you're so gorgeous cumming around me bare, fuck, this might just become my favorite thing."

having reached his own climax too, jaemin slowed his thrusts, riding his release sweetly. a lewd groan escaped from his pink rim when he felt the last stroke before pulling completely out. white stripes of cream poured out of your core, damping the sheet beneath you. the sight provoked him so much, he felt like cumming again.

his right hand made contact with your entrance, soaking his index and middle finger in your mixed slick. he brought his fingers near his mouth and seductively licked them, clearly putting on a sexy show only for you. your raspy giggles casued him to smile wildly as he inched closer to your lips. he gestured with his head for you to open your mouth.

passing the liquid with a long stripe of spit attached to it messed with both your heads. the sensation when the tastebuds met the salty cream brought pleasure physically. jaemin kissed you as soon as you swallowed and held your face tightly, squishing your cheeks in the process.

"i would go to hell and back if it meant I got to fuck you raw again." he said while smiling, as he softly placed his head on his chest.

[jaemanon]

220820 ◇ glitch mode (jaemin)

bonus:

[jaemanon]

jaemin @ kcon la

[jaemanon]

my bunbun and neopuppy are my only weakness 🥰

jaemin.... please... like pretty fucking please i beg you like i don't care even an incubus demon whatever that looks just like you is fine i just wanna feel THAT massive body and cock

Beatbox (M)

preview: “Hey hey, you a new transfer?”

The boy next to you appears horrified, offended with his jaw hung loose. Round eyes more pronounced behind bifocal frames, he splutters, licking at his prominent two front teeth. “I’ve been in this class all year! You transferred into my grade! 10 years ago!”

“Huh?” You shrug, prodding the inside of your cheek in thought. “Really? Weird.”

“Y-yo-you have to be joking!��

“Anyway,” you flick his chin, smirking. “I need a tutor.”

pairing: Jaemin x female reader

word count: 6k+

genre: college AU, nerdy Jaemin, y/n a meanie, crackish, one shot, it’s filth…yay nana day🥳💕

smut warnings: switching, oral, grappling(headlocks, chokeholds, thigh crushing, full nelson, pinning, etc), degradation, competitive rough sex, breeding, spit, use of ‘bunny’, submission

‘If you fail your political history course, I have to sit you out for the upcoming season.’

“Who even studies this shit.” The sheet filled with requirements to continue competing with your varsity wrestling team wrinkles between your fingers.

Three of your courses blared at you, circled with vibrant red sharpie to add more threat behind your coaches words.

‘If you don’t pick up your fucking slack asap, say goodbye to competing in the championship finals.’

No amount of kicking at your locker and swinging your backpack around on your way to class assisted in relieving any of your frustration.

If only you had a dick, fat chance any guy on the boys wrestling team had to worry about their grades. Everyone knew the dean favored his beloved male athletes, bragged and boasted about across states through various top leading universities.

“A tutor” you murmur, rolling your eyes. Reprimanded and put on time-out until you have at the least found a tutor. Either miss out on one of the biggest tournaments in the upcoming weeks, or get your ass a tutor to help you pass your mid-terms.

Someone smart, obviously, a full fledged nerd with their nose buried in a book.

Hmm, no, not Renjun… he hadn’t even made top of your class last year.

Definitely not that pervert Haechan that got caught behind the bleachers jerking off..

Glancing around, you begin to weigh your options.

Jeno, he’s a brain, but he still had tape holding his glasses together after you snapped them in half two months ago. His fault for getting in your way and making you late to practice.

A bleached blonde head of hair and a pile of books masking your potential essential nerd grabs your eye.

The communist manifesto hovers before his face, allowing you enough of a view of thin rimmed silver lenses and eyebrows furrowed deep in concentration. Sneakily you move over to the closest seat near him, silently rejoicing when you spot a pocket protector sitting on his chest.

Perfect.

“Hey hey, you a new transfer?”

The boy next to you appears horrified, offended with his jaw hung loose. Round eyes more pronounced behind bifocal frames, he splutters, licking at his prominent two front teeth. “I’ve been in this class all year! You transferred into my grade, 10 years ago!”

“Huh?” You shrug, prodding the inside of your cheek in thought. “Really? Weird.”

“Y-yo-you have to be joking!”

“Anyway,” you flick his chin, smirking. “I need a tutor.”

The blonde before you grows more indignant, fumbling to set a bookmark in place and fully turn to face you.

“Why would I help you?!” He scoffs, pushing his glasses higher up the bridge of his nose. “You pulled down my pants at our 8th grade dance! In front of the entire school!”

“That was you?!”

“And then you poured punch on me! And told everyone I pissed myself!” He stammers, tapping one of his loafers with each shake of his leg.

“There’s no way that was you!” You giggle, waving him off. “That was this dork Jaem—“

“Jaemin!” He hisses, ripping off his glasses to fix you with a steely look. “Me!”

“Oh my god?? Why are you blonde?” You snort, reaching to stroke the peach fuzz decorating the side of his face. “You need to bleach this too furball.”

Jaemin rustles, smacking your hand away with his lips pursed together, appearing more and more perturbed by everything you say. “Don’t touch me!”

Letting out a sarcastic filled coo you lean in closer, pinching at his cheek. “Aw, did I upset the bunny?”

His eyelids push so far back that you’re surprised when his eyes stay put, expecting for them to fall out and bounce on his notebook.

“What did you just call me?” He says incredulously, grasping onto your wrist tightly.

“Damn, this nerd has some strength,” you cringe, shaking him off. Weakly punching at his arm only to feel overtaken with disbelief again, digging a finger in as you pout wondering why he feels so firm, too firm for a nerd..

“I said stop touching me!” He glowers, forcefully ripping your arm away. “Go away! I do not want to help you in any way!”

“Aw come onnnn, pleaseeee bunny?”

“Stop calling me that!” He hisses, inching closer to speak sternly. “Why do you keep calling me that?!”

Sticking out the top row of your teeth, you tap at the first two and proceed to form bunny ears with your index and middle finger. “You act like one too, vicious and temperamental..”

“Listen,” he snaps before your face, nearly chopping your nose in the process. “I am not going to tutor you! and stop calling me a bunny!”

Hope seems lost until you notice a crimson flush spiking up from his nape. Jaemin’s gaze bounces, clearing his throat as he reaches for his book, faint shades of pink burn at his cheeks, reaching up to the corners of his nose.

“Aww, you like it!” You laugh, scooting closer for your leg to drape over his. “Hear me out bunny, if you help me out, I’ll help you out.”

“I don’t need nor want your help.” He mutters, refusing to meet your stare any longer. Aware of the blush taking over his face destroying the facade he continues on with.

“That’s not true, and you know how I know that?”

Sighing, his chin dips in, frustrated by his curious subconscious. “How.”

“Who else was going to let you know that your fuzzy sideburns give away that the curtains do not match the drapes?” You joke, digging your elbow into his side. Breaking into a round of giggles at the sight of his front teeth poking out again with his mouth hung open.

“Listen, bunny boy, my coach is up my ass about finding a tutor. Just swing by at the end of practice so I can tell him someone with a 4.0 gpa has agreed to help me.” You plead, squeezing at his arm again with confusion. “Why do you feel like that?”

Jaemin throws a hissy fit, shimmying out of your grip once again while snarling in a much too cute way for you to take seriously. “No! Now go away you damn cretin!”

“Hear me out!” You grunt, rolling your eyes. “I know the captain of the football team gives you a swirly every Monday morning.”

Jaemin’s jaw drops yet again, beginning to hate himself for not just getting up and moving away. Starting to find one of your bullies attractive had to make him sick in the head somehow. “Why do you know that?! You just asked me if I transferred!”

“Uh.. selective memory.” You shrug, playing it off with a wide smile. “Anyway, what if I can get him to stop?”

His ears perk up at that, flitting a shifty gaze your way. “You can’t.”

“Oh, trust me, I can. He’s wanted me to suck his dick since the first day of Uni.” You nod mischievously, wiggling your eyebrows.

Jaemin slumps deeper into his seat, contemplating how late it’s making him, having to rush to lecture after rinsing and restyling his hair.

“You know, toilet water is terrible for a fried bleached scalp.”

“My hair is not fried!” He barks, nose scrunched up adorably in irritation.

“You’re right, it looks great..” you note, testing a silky tuft of locks between two fingers. “Kind of weird for a nerd to care this much about his looks though..”

Jaemin jerks away, glaring at you for the name. “Applying for internships has been hard..”

“Ahh, well the blonde looks great on you at least.” Giving him a thumbs up, you invade his space once again. “So, how about it? No more toilet diving if you tutor me??”

He sighs again, expression full of thought as he pouts and aggressively taps at the end of his pen.

“Fine.” His shoulders drop, feeling tense and uncomfortable by the proximity you’ve kept up for much for too long at his side now. Not missing the way your fingers kneaded at his bicep earlier or the intrigued ‘hmm’ tickling at the back of your throat.

“Great! Come by the gym at 4!”

Jaemin trudges toward the gym hall, retelling the memories of his first year when Haechan had convinced him to join him and peep on the girls wrestling team practice from behind the bleachers.

His throat dries, regretting every life decision he’s ever made as he steps inside and spots you choking another girl down onto the ground under your armpit. Deeply swallowing, he settles at the corner of the bleachers uncomfortably. Unable to even pretend that he’s not fascinated by the way you grunt and scream like a wild animal with a mouthguard in as you throttle your opponent down.

Jaemin hates the way he has to tug at his collar, clearing his throat while blinking away to calm his excitement. This was all Haechan’s fault, always going on about how hot wrestling porn is, especially when the girl in the video starts off strong only to lose and get annihilated by a huge cock.

“I’ve never wanted anything more.” His friend said while peering through small open spaces from behind a set of bleachers. “Look at that one.”

Haechan nudges his chin in your direction, grappling down your opponent with a shout and slamming your fists on your chests like a beast. “Bet she would be so fun to fucking ruin.”

Jaemin hates that his friend was right. Even now as he watches you jump up from the ground showing off your flexibility with a cocky grin; he can’t help but think about it. How exhilarating and hot it would be to experience you trying to take him down. Fight him with that same smile stretching your mouth in a crass way, disgusting how full of yourself you are. The way you walk around thinking you’re hot shit and no one can touch you.

Too deep in his head, Jaemin manages to miss you walking right up to him. Shaking out of his thoughts as you let out a boisterous obnoxious laugh and point at his lap.

“Are you seriously fucking hard from watching me practice!?” You shout out much too loud, humiliating him as your teammates all glance over and begin to laugh.

“Ugh. Fucking nerds are all the same.” Your friend taunts passing by on her way to the locker room. “Just like that other one that thinks we can’t hear him busting a nut behind the bleachers.”

Punching at his shoulder, you laugh more, clutching your stomach and wiping at tears before they can run down your cheeks. “That’s so cute bunny, you wanna wrestle me or something?”

Jaemin’s mouth opens. Opens and slams shut repeatedly, lost for words as he drags a heated gaze over your sweat soaked uniform. Spending too much time admiring the fold between your thighs wedged up nicely between your…

“Dude, what the fuck? Quit staring at my vag like that.” You punch him again, whistling for your coach to come over and meet your ‘tutor’.

Jaemin jumps up, standing by your side with false confidence. “Maybe I do!”

“What was that now, bunny?”

“Stop calling me that!” He huffs, balling up his fist. “I could wrestle you, and I’ll beat you.”

“Excuse me?!” You snort, fixing him with amused wide eyes. “Are you serious right now?”

“I am.” He says, nodding and pursing his lips to appear tough. “If you pass your mid-term, then you owe me a match.”

Nerves rise fast as your coach approaches, spluttering, too stunned to think over what he’s said. “You have a thing for girls beating your ass?”

Jaemin’s nose twitches, eyes thinning as he shoves against your side. “We have a deal or what?”

“Fine!” You panic, rushed to answer while waving at your coach. “I got a tutor!”

Between fake smiles and quickly falsifying study sessions, you end up actually taking on tutoring lessons.

“Why do you have a wrestling mat in your basement?” Jaemin asks one day, following you through your house to the second room you have taken over for practice purposes.

“The better to wrestle you with.” You wink, nudging his side. “I’m studying hard just to whoop your cute blonde bunny ass.”

“What happens if I lose?” Jaemin questions, cracking his toes against the wrestling mat laid out in your basement.

“What do you mean ‘what if?’, you still think you have even the slightest chance to beat me?” You sneer. Too cocky for your own good as you squat with your legs stretched to loosen your hips. Predicting you will need the extra help if things go as you’ve planned.

Jaemin’s gaze shifts, bouncing around the room he’s helped you study in over the past couple of weeks. Toying with the zipper cool against his throat as he realizes how ridiculous this situation is.

“Listen, I don’t think this is a good idea.” He reiterates, briskly eyeing the loose sweats hiding what he assumes is your spandex wrestling uniform.

“It’s okay to lose, bunny.“ you wink, standing up to discard the zip-up hoodie covering up a skin-tight fitted one piece. Snug in all the right places to have his throat visibly bob the second he spots your smooth skin, lathered in lotion you noticed he seemed to enjoy the scent of the last time you wore it during a study session.

“I’ll go easy on you.” With a coy smile you shove down your bottoms just enough to give him peeks of your naked hips. The majority of the lycra fabric has bunched up, riding up your ass in a lewd way that makes Jaemin clear his throat, averting his focus to the ground.

“I truly have no idea how you passed your mid-term.” Jaemin rolls his eyes, stretching back his shoulders as he reaches to unzip his sweater.

The prideful grin bunching your cheeks slowly falls apart, drooping comically the more he unveils planes of flesh; sculpted and carved to perfection from long hours spent lifting weights.

Jaemin lets his jacket slip down his arms, standing proud with a blank face as your jaw hangs. It takes more restraint than he imagined to control the twitch pinching at his mouth, avoiding the intense stare tracing from his lengthy throat, pronounced Adam’s apple, broad shoulders and thick chest trapped between bulging biceps.

“What the fuck.” You announce, breathlessly. “What the fuck dude?!”

Jaemin shrugs, breaking into a smile that scrunches his nose, pushing his glasses up higher between his brows. “You’ll go easy on me, right?”

Jaemin’s buff. A fucking buff nerd that’s never once mentioned that he took up absorbing protein shakes like water and bulking up at the gym after long days filled with studying and schoolwork.

“Hey.” He pushes your chin before your tongue can loll out like a thirsty dog. “Try not to look so shocked, it’s kind of rude.”

“Why—” you gulp, finally snapping out of it enough to toe off your sweats and kick them aside. “Why the fuck are you this yolked?!”

Jaemin shrugs, unzipping his bottoms to further make you shrivel, lowering his jeans to show off the tiniest pair of spandex shorts. They dig into his upper thigh, cutting at the flexed muscle framing the thick shape between.

“Oh come on!”

He chuckles, bending over to strip the rest of his clothing off. Balling up his outfit to throw aside, he stands straight in all his glory, cut and ripped leading up to a soft round face and doe eyes, front teeth digging into his lower lip.

“You’re fucking with me.” You utter, cleaning off imaginary drool from your chin.

“Not yet..” Jaemin cocks a brow, cracking his neck side to side. “I got tired of not fighting back, so I started working out.”

He shrugs, done explaining more when he recalls that you are one of the many who tormented him over the years. Making fun of him without care, invisible to you unless it was to pick on him.

“That makes sense.” You murmur to yourself, kicking out your legs before settling in a lowered stance, preparing to take down your larger opponent. “Guess I won’t be taking it very easy on you after all.”

“Won’t you spare me?” He smirks, bending at his knees with his arms lifting to grab you and tackle you down.

Jaemin gulps to contain his nerves, thankful for the shadow falling on his glasses beneath the dim lighting fanned throughout the room. His throats already began to dry, flitting over your breasts obscenely squeezed out, shoved together creating perfect perky fat mounds ready to be choked between his fingers.

Time to size up your competitor goes to complete shit. Jaemin’s thick beyond comprehension. Corded muscles strain up his thighs to narrow hips and a tight little waist dipping in such an absurd way. His frame widens ridiculously, more ridiculous than the situation you’ve put yourself in as a mere joke.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

Licking at your lips, you begin to circle him, following suit as he mimics your motions.

Inhaling a deep breath, you meet his gaze, lowering your chin for intimidation. “Hey, Jaemin.”

“Huh?”

You almost feel sorry attacking his weak spot by throwing him off. It’s playing dirty, but you know there’s no better way to get him plastered on his back. Tackled down onto the mat with your face buried in his chest, Jaemin lets out a gust of air. Caught off guard as you ram him down in one fell swoop.

He grunts, the back of his head bouncing off the mat; realizing he should have suffered itchy burning eyeballs and opted for contact lenses today.

“Amateur,” you groan, tethering his forearms together. Each muscle lining your back screams, flexing as you attempt to take control by slotting your hips against his. “Shouldn’t be s-so cocky—“

Jaemin growls, huffing out another breath to blow his bangs off of his forehead. Jerking his hips up to jostle your weight to the side brings on instant regret, muffling a curse by locking his lips. His cock fattens, searing heat pulses from the tip of his length to his navel.

“F-fuck,” you grit, pressing harder onto his crossed arms until his chest caves. “Playing dirty won’t help you win.”

Jaemin’s breath lodges, clenching the backs of his teeth as he bends his knees. His heels dig into the mat, hoisting up with more force until you topple over and lose your balance, fast as he escapes your grip and grabs onto your shoulders and plants your back flat.

“Playing dirty?” He asks, licking at his front teeth.

Jaemin circles your thighs, pushing them open to space an area for himself between your legs. He hovers near your lips, glasses slipping lower, just above the tip of his nose. “Like you distracting me with your entire ass out? What the fuck are you even wearing, huh?”

“Get off of me!” You say with clamped teeth, only bringing amusement to his face as his biceps bracket your head. “This is a normal uniform!”

“Yeah,” he laughs, using the end of your nose to set his glasses back into place. His hips roll, a focused control freezing your lower half down as his knees burn against the mat, turning sticky with moisture secreting. “A normal uniform for some slut doing wrestling porn. That’s what this is for you, isn’t it?”

He finishes the question with a pointed grind, cock nestled against your clothed core further burying the material of your suit between your folds. “Between the two of us, you know who lacks brains here.”

Jaemin’s gaze darkens, lowering closer until his bottom lip runs between the seam of your mouth. Fitting together deliciously, wet from sweat gathering on both of your upper lips and saliva clinging to the tips of your tongues.

He can feel it, hot and humid against his groin. Your pussy spreading over his shorts, clit incessantly rubbing on your suit with each little shift.

“Ugh, f-fucking nerd.” Squeezing your eyes shut, you struggle by jostling your lower half as much as you can. Barely fazing him as he licks down your chin, forming a trail of drool down to the middle of your neck hollowing in for him to lap at. The sweat pooled there tastes savory at first, hit by a bitter aftertaste from the alcohol in your scented lotion. Fitting for you, sour and sweet as you’ve acted with him.

“Call me a nerd again.” He pushes up, causing your eyebrows to twist as his chest pumps out. Pecs hard as a rock, nipples pointed like icicles despite the heat gathering between your bodies. “See what happens.”

“Oooh, s-so scared,” you choke, Jaemin grabbing onto your throat when you try to sit up and shove him off. “I’ll break your glasses, see how tough you f-feel.”

Your taunting only eggs him on, ferociously pushing his side against your inner thigh until your centers fully exposed for him to press three digits against your exposed folds. Gliding up to pinch your suit around your clit until your feet slip and you kick at the mat.

“Get this wet for a fucking nerd huh?” He jeers, rolling your bundle of nerves under the damp fabric. “Maybe that’s why you bullied me, wanted me to fuck that bratty better-than-you attitude out of you.”

All you can do is struggle, attempting to dislodge your throat from his menacing hold, only seeping his fingers further into the veins rapidly pulsating up the sides of your neck.

“If only it had been the other way around,” he goes on mocking, blurring over your clit faster and faster until you’re coughing between trapped moans. “Imagine if I bullied you, getting your revenge on me years later by cornering me and fucking me until I’m incapable or forming a sentence.”

His speech lands on muted ears, passing through a thick fog of arousal that clogs up your senses, too focused on how thick his forearm looks. The veins rippling upward toward his meaty bicep shout at you, pumping full of anger with each flick of his wrist.

“You’re right, I got hard watching you practice.” He confesses, turning his hips for you to feel his chubbed up girth against your inner thigh. “Wanna know why?”

Gurgling escapes you, licking at the roof of your mouth to suppress another embarrassing sound from passing. He laughs, sharp teeth gleaming as they catch the light. “Because..”

Gathering the seat of your bottoms, he tugs at the material with a balled up fist. Ripping roughly at it to make you writhe and squeal in pain, burning against your clit with each pull. “This is why, to see you like this. So fucking full of yourself, but you can’t even pass a stupid test without a nerds help.”

Mesmerized by your folds swelling up around your suit, Jaemin’s waist bends in, momentarily forgetting about his grip on your neck; just enough to give you leeway to push up on your elbows and regain control.

It’s easy to pin Jaemin down again, startling him with power he wished to assume you lack. He curses when you fling him down roughly and mount his chest. Gathering fistfuls of his sweaty blonde locks, you rip at his scalp until he’s whining, elongated neck arched back releasing an obscene moan between his pretty pink lips. Ragged breath spills from your chest, working hard to maneuver forward until your inner thighs clap against his cheeks. Slotting your suit aside too fast for Jaemin to even let out a gasp of surprise.

Smashing your core down against his mouth sends a hiss flying out of you, grinding down hard despite the ridges of his teeth scraping along your clit. He muffles, flailing beneath you, glasses fogged up with slick and heat radiating from your lower half. A relieved laugh sounds, nodding as you work to crush your thighs around him to a suffocating point.

“Bunny talks tough—“ you grit, gyrating against his tongue until he groans. Losing your train of thought once again when his tongue curves, applying pressure against your entrance until you give. Loosening up and relaxing enough to push through. “Fuck.”

Jaemin can’t complain, even as he struggles to breathe through his nose, stuffed full of your clit rubbing incessantly against him. He’s crazed, determined to stretch his jaw until it breaks under your unforgiving thrusts.

Behind your back his knees bend, angling his hips up to fuck at nothing but air. Desperate as he slaps a merciless grip on your ass, repeating it until you get the message to ride his tongue.

Securing one hand on his head, you pull harder, using the hold to control your motions. His tongue wiggling between your walls while passing vibrating grunts, raspy broken whimpers. The unexpected slap you deliver between his thighs has him coughing, choking and screaming finding it impossible to swallow a long enough breath.

“Little b-bunny can’t even handle f-fighting a girl can he?” You scramble to taunt him, whimpering as he manages to dislodge his tongue and suck on your clit. Spreading your ass apart to have your hole pulse open against his chin as he uses every inch of his face to rub and flick. Messy, fucking disgusting with a pleased gleam hiding under splattered lenses.

Jaemin’s teeth nip, lapping side to side on your clit before he wraps his lips again. A mean suck and nimble digits digging in too close to your rim have you toppling forward. A shouted moan expelling as you whine and bounce down to fully release your orgasm on his chin and neck.

White haze takes over the room, brain spinning too much to process being manhandled onto your back. Only between a coughed whimper do you come down, blinking up to find Jaemin above you, grasping your ankles above your head with a devilish smirk playing at his lips.

“You think I give up that easily? That was child’s play.” He taunts, pushing hard abdominal muscles against your exposed puffy cunt. Rough and grating as he passes from the thick line of dark hair trailing down inside of his shorts. A silent gasp emits as he grinds against your ass, hoisted off the mat the more he tests your flexibility, continuing to push and push until you’re folded in half.

Lazily you blink, reaching between your upper halves to scrape at his chest. Tweaking and pinching at one of his hardened nipples. With clenched teeth he takes advantage of your drunk-like post orgasmic state, releasing an ankle and replacing his hold with a hard bite. Sharp canine teeth sink near your tendon, shaking his head to make you shout and whimper louder. Free hand making use of your moment of weakness to release his erect length.

“Know what mean girls like you need?” He says between licking at teeth marks left behind on your ankle. Stroking to the tip of his length as he directs himself between your dripping wet folds. Sliding up and down for you to go crosseyed, stupid dumb just from feeling how fucking thick and wide he is.

“B-bunny..”

He doesn’t give you a chance to say more, penetrating with one fluid practiced motion. Years of masturbating and studying porn only served to build up his knowledge. Practicing what he learned with any girl who would give him the opportunity at science camp over the last few summers.

“Thick fucking cock to shut you up.” Finishing his sentence with a choked growl, he grinds, adding emphasis by giving you each inch.

The moan that rips from your chest says it all.

Full, so full. Thick, so fucking thick.

He’s bigger than any popular jerk you’ve fucked at frat parties. Obscenely stretching you out, split open and so unbelievably full.

“Aww,” he tries to mock, unable to stop himself from pressing in balls deep. Pressed deep enough for coarse dark hairs to scratch against your clit in the position. Folded in half and dwarfed beneath his massive size, both of his hands snake around your ankles, using his rocking hips to aid the push he gives. Your calves surround you, burning up the backs of your thighs from tight tendons working overtime.

“Weak. Nothing but a hole to take my cock.” Regaining some semblance at the visual of tears beginning to pour freely down your cheeks, Jaemin arches back, burying his knees into the mat to hit your hard with a pointed thrust.

Pinning you down with every muscle straining in his arms, he fills you to the brim. Cock too thick, nestling past any squeeze you give, any push the muscles inside of you use to suffocate his length.

“Don’t s-stop,” you choke, eyeing where he continues to dive in and out. His cock glistens coated in thick amounts of wetness, globs of it stuck on the patch of hair at the base. Wet, filthy and so fucking wet everywhere.

“So fucking greedy, full of cock and still you want more?” He spits, licking at saliva dribbling down his chin. “Want me to fill you up? Breed you like nothing but a stupid little cum dump.”

“Uh huh..” no amount of humiliation burning up your chest can deny how good it feels. Unwilling to even struggle or bother to get away from his hips pummeling forward. Hiccups and coughed sobs assist the rapid nod you give him, too overwhelmed to even picture how much Jaemin can give you.

He wishes he could laugh, but you feel too good, too perfect. The tip of his length catches on your convulsing hole with each draw back. It’s too much for you to even look at, witnessing the tip lifting at the skin covering your mound. Feeling deeper than what you can even actually see, as if his cock can reach the back of your throat with every thrust he gives you.

“Pl-please bunny..” you babble, worrying your bottom lip, fingers twitching for something. Finding his shoulders to weakly scratch at, dragging down to the cut his bicep muscle creates. “I-inside, please..”

Jaemin groans, circling his hips in a more meticulous manner. Cock dragging against your walls in a way that sends your toes curling. Legs trembling, nearly ripping free of his hold when he hits you just right, cockhead kissing your cervix with ease, hitting the perfect angle each time.

“Pleasepleasepleaseplease.”

Maintaining his hold to keep you bent in half somehow, Jaemin fucks faster, ruthless and harsh, encouraged by your babbling and whines. Thrust after thrust harder than the previous, ripping his chest and abdominal muscles to appear carved out of stone with all the more vigor he utilizes to fuck you like you need and beg for.

“Ahhh…fuck!” Jaemin’s voice comes out strangled, using every bit of his strength to keep fucking you even as you lock up around him. Gripping a powerful orgasm around his cock, the pressure, push and pull almost forcing his cock to slip out. Gushed around, so wet and sloppy, spilling release down to his balls.

Despite your shrieks, he only manages to go even faster. Blurry above you as he pounds through your orgasm, gritting and panting similar to one of your opponents by the end of a long match. Rumbling from deep within his chest as he meets your eyes, glasses dropping off, tightening up when you find his blown out pupils.

Jaemin cums, cock thrumming violently with each hot drop of release bursting free, filling you up and up until he has to curse. Removing his hold as his broad shoulders tremble, absorbing the heat between your bodies through tremors rolling up his tense back muscles.

That’s enough, you think, rolling away in search of a towel to wipe yourself with. Whining when your hip lets out a nasty crack, you knew that pre-stretch would be needed, but not this much.

“Where do you think you’re going?” A lowered voice asks, shivering up your spine as you whimper, burning where your wet thighs rub against the mat feebly attempting to crawl away.

“N-no no m-more..”

Jaemin laughs, worse than an evil villain from any movie or show. Slow to walk on his knees over your pathetic excuse of getting away. He hauls your arms back, clicking his tongue with a breathless chuckle. “This will teach you to fuck with nerds.”

Burying back inside of you aches more than you can comprehend, imagining your brain exploding and spilling out of your ears as he rolls down. Cock sunk in to the hilt, gushing out the release he just filled you with. His size too much for you to hold both in, slick, wet, and so fucking loud with each draw back and slap of his hips.

“Jaemin!” It’s your first time wailing out his name, not missing a beat as he picks up the pace. His chest falls against your back knocking air out of your lungs, more determined to ruin you on his cock again. Make you regret the day you first saw him and made the worst decision to fuck with him.

“Where’s your cute bunny now?” He asks against your ear, watching your eyes roll back into your head. Biting at your jaw, he reaches around, budging his bicep against your chin. Hips snap brutally into you, pulling you into a death inducing chokehold roughly. He pulls harder, making your chest shove out and waist dip in until you’re bent far back, slapping one hand against the mat.

“You give up?!” He grunts against your cheek, jostling your throat with a shake of his arm. Tongue hanging out panting, you reach for his wrist, scurrying to hold onto anything you can.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

A quiet cry and suppressed choke follows your palm smacking the mat with repeated motion. In disbelief by the sound of grunts, flesh clapping against flesh, popping wet and nasty with each smooth glide of Jaemin’s cock filling you up without losing any speed.

“Fuck,” his eyes squeeze, stomach muscles contracting with each unforgiving thrust further dragging you up the mat. Chasing after his next release, Jaemin runs for the victory by throwing his other arm around your neck, further pulling you into a headlock. Groaning by how much wetter you get, purging out more and more arousal with every ripple of his bicep against your jaw.

“That’s right.” He starts, blinking away sweat that won’t stop raining down, getting trapped in his long eyelashes. “Never forget how you let a nerd beat you.”

Another weak tap and pinch on his wrist has you cumming, arching high enough to nearly make him lose his rhythmic pace. Using powerful thigh muscles to push up and hit you with thrusts hard enough to have your heart beating out past your chest.

Slam after merciless slam turns messy, hips swerving pushing past your cunt gripping and milking for him to cum again. Give you the warm load to keep inside this time, greedily squeezing around him for another.

The squeaky cracked moan Jaemin lets out has your eyes rolling to the side, pleased that even after all of his tough talk, you can still weaken him somehow.

Tapping on his forearm finally gives you a chance to take deep breaths, only to be plastered by his limp dead weight collapsing onto you.

“So,” Jaemin breathes, wet chest heavily panting against your back. He bites at your nape, hoisting your chin up with his forearm perched under your jaw. “What’s my prize?”

“Ugh..” nothing more than a lazy response pours out of you. Continuing to reel and shiver under the weight melting you down into the ruined mat covered in every type of bodily fluid. “Whatever.”

If not for the chokehold around your throat, you’d knock out in less than a second. Thoroughly fucked and ran through by the same nerd that you once picked on and made cry for a laugh. The irony doing more to make your gut curl in with renewed arousal as you lock up around him.

“What was that? Whatever, huh?” He has the audacity to let out a fake chuckle, rumbling at the top of your spine. Free arm reaching down to push between your connected lower halves as he lifts to create space. “In that case..”

Jaemin’s index finger slips past bruises forming on your backside. Teasing as he pushes between your ass and traces your puckered rim. He pops free from your ruined hole, kissing at the backs of his teeth as a pool of cum bubbles out; settling in the shape of a perfect triangle at the top of your squished together thighs.

Prodding at your hole, Jaemin bites away a smile when you squirm and whimper, turning to give him a look full of excitement and fear. He meets your gaze with maniacal thrill, pushing his pouty lips together to create a faucet for a thick wad of spit to pour, landing directly on your ass to be smeared around.

“I’ll go easy on you.”

[jaemanon]

220401 ◇ glitch mode (jaemin)

[jaemanon]

Something To Prove

JaeminxReader

Word Count: 13.4k

Warnings/Summary: enemies to lovers, smut, mentions of drinking, vaguely dub con, fingering, oral (reader receiving), penetrative, degradation, public. And where Jaemin is kind immature dick, the reader is an emotional masochist, and together they’re both fucking morons, so I hope you enjoy. (Also sorry Jeno I used you for story development)

——————————————————————

Jaemin was a good boy. 

Jaemin was a very good boy. 

That’s why, as he rambled on about something, something blah blah momentum and force nonsense, you wanted to lean over and take a big bite right from his pretty long neck. 

It’s also why you kind of hated him if you thought about it for too long. 

~

~

Jaemin wasn’t someone you’d consider yourself very close with, actually, he wasn’t someone you ever really spoke to until very recently. He was a nice guy, a hard working student, and seemed to get along with everyone that spoke to him, but to you, he was more of just a guy you’d admire from afar. You knew enough about him to know that he just wasn’t someone you’d ever cross paths with if it wasn’t for your shared classes and mutual friends. 

But other than that, you never had any reason to dislike him. Not until your physics professor gave you a reason. 

—

“This is just how it is,” the older man had said, his face showing more age than he had actually lived from how many students he’d had to deal with, “the few homework assignments you do turn in, aren’t good,” he spoke honestly as he flips through the very few copies of your submitted work, “and your grade just keeps dropping by the day. So it’s either you find some initiative to bring up your grade, or I’m going to request you drop my class.”

“But it’s already past the drop period,” you argued, worry blooming across the features of your face, “if I drop it now, I fail immediately.”

“I mean this in the nicest way I can possibly say it,” he said with an exhausted sigh, “but that’s not really my problem. I do as much as I can as your professor, but I can’t force you to do your work.”

When he said this you wanted to cry. Well, no, you wanted to offer to suck his dick for a higher grade if you’re being totally honest with yourself, but the lovely picture that he kept on his desk of him, his wife, and baby daughter was enough to plague you with guilt for even considering that. 

“Well, then I can bring up my grade instead, right?” You asked hopefully, the look of skepticism that flashed on his face making you shrink, “that’s what you said,” you reminded, your hands moving rapidly in front of you as you tried to encourage him and yourself, “bring up my grade or drop the class. Bringing up my grade is an option.”

“The science department has a student-ran study center,” he told you with a sigh, standing from his desk to politely tell you the conversation was coming to an end, “they even have student tutors that can help you if you’re that determined to make this work.”

“Thank you, professor,” you spoke genuinely, moving to his office door with a weak smile on your face, “I swear I’ll figure this out.”

“Study center is just down the hall,” he informed you, “but,” he continued, stopping you in your tracks as you already had a foot out his door, “only go there if you’re serious about this. They’re students too, so you don’t need to be wasting their time.”

—

His words still sting even now as you sit next to Jaemin, your pen bouncing against the library table in impatience. It stung, but now as you sit zoned out staring at the way Jaemin’s Adam’s apple bounces as he speaks, you can kind of understand where he was coming from. 

You weren’t a horrible student, you just struggled to focus on classes that don’t actually interest you, and physics does not interest you in the slightest. Jaemin on the other hand, was a phenomenal student. There didn’t seem to be any subject he had any real issue with, but physics was his bread and butter. That’s why the sweet girl who assigned tutors sent you to him, but it’s also why you kind of wanted to rip his head off his nice, wide shoulders. 

You wouldn’t call Jaemin a nerd, not to his face at least, but he genuinely wasn’t what you’d think of when you pictured a text-book “nerd.” He didn’t struggle in social situations, he didn’t seem weird or creepy, and he was admittedly drop-dead gorgeous. He just really seemed to really love math and science, which would be a huge help to you, if you could just stop staring at his throat like a hungry animal. 

“And when you consider the angle in which…” he says as he turns to look at you, the dazed look being very evident on your face and making him trail off before he sternly says your name, “are you even listening to me right now?”

You jump at his sudden acknowledgment, the annoyed look on his face reminding you of the main issue you had with him. 

Jaemin kind of hated you. 

You would understand if he hated you for not paying attention, you could see how frustrating that would be, but he seemed to hate you before he even started tutoring you. The day you met, he was immediately distant and cold towards you, and you had seen plenty of instances of him being a very friendly guy. So, you were very confused, and you even tried to switch your tutor to avoid the tension and preserve the image of him you liked to fantasize about, but unfortunately, Jaemin was all they had. So the deeper you got into tutoring sessions with him, and the more you saw just how blatantly he did not like your presence, that’s where you started to zone out, choosing to at least appreciate the eye candy if you weren’t going to get anything academic out of the relationship. 

“Yeah totally,” you lie, leaning closer to look at the textbook as you clear your throat, “just trying to keep up.”

You laugh weakly as he keeps staring at you, his dark eyes and the way his thick eyebrows lower making you feel like he can read your mind. You shift uncomfortably under his glare, and when he simply rolls his eyes, you feel your own spark of annoyance bubble up in your chest. 

“How about we call it a day then, hm?” He offers, flashing a fake smile in your direction before he loudly slams the book in front of him closed, “you very clearly have more important things to worry about.”

“You know what, Jaemin,” you sigh, matching his sarcastically sweet tone, “I actually do.” 

You both immediately turn to your respective things, packing your bags and moving to leave the small private study room. He stands quickly before you, turning to look down at you as irritation radiates off his body. 

“Well, whatever it is,” he starts, putting his hands together in front of his chest to speak to you like a kindergarten teacher, “I can only assume it must be incredibly important considering you’re putting it above the class you’re miserably failing.”

“I’ll have you know,” you argue, making him stop in his walk towards the door, “my grade has gone up more than a few points these past few weeks,” you speak honestly this time, an amused laugh coming out as a huff from your nose, “which I can admit, is partially due to your help, but also because some of us, actually know how to balance school work and having a fucking life.”

“And what exactly was that supposed to suggest?” He asks, turning back to you with an offended twist in his features. 

“Oh come on,” you huff again, getting up and walking to stand next to him at the door, “you know exactly what I was suggesting.”

“Actually I don’t,” he shrugs, crossing his arms and tilting his head, “so why don’t you enlighten me?”

“You. Have. No. Life,” you speak slowly and childishly, smiling when you can tell your words bother him. 

“I have a life,” he scoffs, getting annoyed in a way that is a lot more enjoyable to you then it should be, “you have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Oh I don’t?” You start, looking up at the ceiling as if you’re deep in thought, “I have never seen you without your head buried in a book, and of all the parties I’ve been to, I’ve never seen you once,” your hand flitters in the air as you speak, and you continue, speaking over him as he tries to defend himself, “which arguably, could just mean we don’t go to the same parties, right? But that’s not the case, at least not according to Jeno.”

The mention of his friend’s name makes him stiffen, his lips curling in between his teeth as he shakes his head, “just because I don’t go to parties doesn’t mean I don’t have a life.”

“You’re right, it doesn’t,” you agree, nodding your head, “but the fact that the only place you go to aside from your dorm and your classes is the library…” you trail off, clicking your tongue in faux disappointment, before you turn to open the door. 

“Also,” you start to add as you step out of the room, “you might want to have a talk to Jeno about keeping some things to himself,” you nod gently, “I swear that boy is just an open book when you find the right questions to ask.”

——

Jaemin clearly doesn’t take your advice about talking to Jeno, or at least Jeno just didn’t care if he did. Because not even a full hour later, he was sending you a text to tell you how annoyed Jaemin was when he got back to their shared dorm. 

I’m surprised there wasn’t steam coming out of his ears, Jeno’s message read, the multiple laughing emojis he put on the end telling you he was probably rolling in unsympathetic laughter after Jaemin gave him a rundown of what happened. 

You didn’t want to enjoy the relayed information as much as you did, but there was just something about getting the last laugh with Jaemin that gave you a rush. So you grinned stupidly at your phone, the idea that you could plague Jaemin’s mind without having to be physically present making the device shake in your hand. 

The shaking stops when another text from Jeno pops up on your screen. 

Anyways, the message starts, now that you’re free of Jaemin’s wrath you should come out to the bar with us tonight. 

You don’t know exactly who the “us” in his message entails, Jeno’s list of friends being long and always interchangeable, but you agree regardless. The need to get wasted to celebrate getting on Jaemin’s nerves almost overwhelming. 

——

The bar is loud but familiar as you stumble in. Bodies of already drunk college students dance and writhe in front of you, and you reach to tug at the hem of your dress as your eyes dart around in search of a familiar face. 

The fading pink of Haechan’s hair is the first thing you see, and you let out a sigh of relief that gets lost amongst the heavy bass that shakes the floor. You start to stumble towards the beacon that is the boy’s head, and when you see Jeno sat next to him animatedly telling a story, you feel a soft smile pull at your lips. 

Your smile doesn’t prevail for long, as when you get within a few feet of the table they have claimed, you see that the person who sits on Jeno’s other side is none other than the boy who put the fire in your chest that you anticipated in smothering out with alcohol. 

You stop in shock for a moment, the sight of Jaemin sitting in the bar unfamiliar and admittedly, a bit weird. He doesn’t look extremely out of place, for one he doesn’t have his face within inches of an academic article, but you can see the tension that pushes at his shoulders. 

His hand is wrapped around a mostly filled drink, his lips strained slightly red to tell you that he’s taken at least a few sips, and he leans in with a furrow in his brow as he tries to hear Jeno’s voice over the music. 

You aren’t really aware of how blatantly you’re staring at him, analyzing the way he moves and interacts like he’s a wild animal outside of his usual environment, until his eyes flicker quickly towards you. He has to double take, not registering who you are at first glance, but when he returns your stare, you can tell he feels shy under your intense eyes. 

You can tell he clears his throat from the way his throat shifts, his head dropping slightly as he nudges a still rambling Jeno. Your legs seem to remember their function in that moment as you start approaching them again, a degree more hesitantly now, and you’re almost directly behind Jeno when he finally turns around. 

“Hey,” Jeno drawls, speaking your name as a smile fills his face, “I was wondering when the fuck you’d get here.” 

You can tell he’s already a few drinks in from the way the skin of his face flushes and how he wraps his arms loosely around the back of his chair. Without thinking, you reach to brush the few strands of hair that’s fallen in front of his eyes, and return his smile with a small laugh. 

“Well, I’m here,” you say, leaning back to playfully motion your hands up and down your body, “you can hold your applause.”

Your words earn a laugh from Haechan as he reaches to pinch at your elbow, but Jeno only scoffs. You almost forget Jaemin is even there as he sits there silently, but when Jeno turns towards him as quickly as his intoxicated brain will allow him, the boy straightens at the sudden acknowledgment. 

“We saved you a seat next to Jaem,” he nods, leaning his head back to wink at you not as discreetly as he had probably intended, “if you think you can hold back from ripping his head off for the night.”

“I’ll be on my best behavior,” you hollowly promise, leaning down to kiss his heated forehead before you step towards the empty seat, “for now at least.”

Jaemin shifts uncomfortably in his seat as you sit down, and you hold back the urge to roll your eyes. Instead you scoot your chair closer and lean towards him as Jeno starts to clue you in to the story he had already gotten halfway through. 

——

You, Haechan, and Jeno bounce the conversation around the three of you as the night goes on, Jaemin only adding grunts and nods of acknowledgment where he sought fit. He looks more comfortable than when you first arrived, and you can only imagine it’s due to his drink now being mostly finished at this point, but he seems to refuse to let his eyes linger on you for more than a few brief seconds every now and again. 

“So, Jeno,” Haechan starts, taking a long swig of his beer as a teasing slur weaves through his words, “how’d you get our little bookworm out of the library for once?”

He leans over Jeno to pinch roughly at Jaemin’s thigh as he speaks, the boy next to you jumping and shooting him a scowl in response. His fingers tap in annoyance against the table in front of him, and as the beer you stole from Jeno slinks through your veins, you can’t stop yourself as your eyes zero in on the movement. 

“He asked to come,” Jeno admits playfully, proudly slapping Jaemin on the back and forcing a sarcastic smile to spread over his face, “I guess he finally decided we were good enough to get a drink with.”

“He needed it,” you interject before you can even stop the words from coming from your mouth, and as Jaemin’s blank stare flicks over to you for longer than a few seconds, you stumble to explain, “I mean,” you say with a huff, laying a hesitant hand on his bicep, “you should see how tense this one gets when were in that study room.”

“Probably because he’s bricked up from being locked in a room with you,” Jeno laughs, leaning forward to shoot you what you think is his attempt at another wink, “I know I’d be.”

“That’s because you’re disgusting,” you argue, rolling your eyes, “Jaemin’s a good boy, isn’t that right?”

You glance at him with a smile, just trying to include him in the conversation that centers around himself, but when his arm tenses under your touch, you slip your hand away from him quickly. 

“Yeah, our perfect little guy,” Haechan coos, reaching behind Jeno now to tug at Jaemin’s ear. 

Jaemin jerks away from his touch quickly, grumbling under his breath and making you tense as his knee accidentally pushes between yours briefly. He doesn’t seem to notice the action or the way you respond, as he just straightens back up when Haechan pulls away and rolls his shoulders back. 

“I’m tense because the person I tutor,” Jaemin finally interjects, his eyes darting back to you, “doesn’t seem to actually care about anything I’m telling them,” he continues, turning back to his friends, and you can’t help but feel like he’s tattling on you. 

“He speaks!” Jeno almost yells, ignoring Jaemin’s admission that you’re a horrible student, “but admit it,” he says, his voice calmer as his arm falls across the back of Jaemin’s chair, “you have a hard time paying attention too with someone that hot sitting so close to you, don’t you?”

“Jeno,” you interrupt as he tries to wink again, trying to spare yourself and Jaemin from his question, “have I ever told you how much of a gentleman you are?”

“Actually, no you haven’t,” he responds, the shock in his voice being so genuine that it throws you a bit. 

“Good,” you nod, “because it would be a lie if I did.”

You want to enjoy the way Jeno starts to petulantly writhe in his seat, his head falling back as he whines about how mean you are, but you suddenly feel the weight of eyes on you. You hesitantly flick your eyes towards Jaemin, and you see him staring blankly at you in your peripherals. You know he sees the cautious glance you offer him before you look back towards where Haechan is laughing at Jeno’s display, but he shows no interest in looking away, instead he just sinks back in his seat as you start to squirm. 

You cross your legs as he seems lost in trailing his eyes over you shamelessly, your eyes darting back to him a few times as you try to focus on the new conversation Haechan and Jeno had started, but he seems unmoving aside from his eyebrows knitting together like he’s trying to figure something out. You want to ask him what’s up, the question bubbling rudely at the back of your throat, but his face just continues to screw up as if he’s angry and it kills any syllable that tries to form on your tongue. 

You jump slightly at the first touch of his hand on your knee, his fingers swirling curiously against your skin as if it was a normal action for him. But you could count on one hand the times Jaemin has made any physical contact with you, and considering how most of them were completely unintentional, having him move towards you with so much purpose made you twitch. 

You glance down at where his fingers prod at your skin, the same fingers you’ve unfortunately found yourself staring at as he wrote notes down in your textbook during your tutoring session, before you finally look up towards him. 

His head is tilted down, watching the small invisible patterns he creates on your leg with the same deep, angry look on his face. You can’t even begin to imagine what he’s thinking, but when he looks up to make eye contact with you, it feels like he can see every thought you’ve ever had. 

You feel sucked into a bubble with him as Jeno and Haechan are too busy talking over one another to notice the newly formed tension. It feels like you’ve started a staring contest with one another, the unspoken rule that you can’t look away being agreed upon quickly, but you can’t help but wonder what would happen if you did. 

You see a small twitch at the corner of his lip when you harshly swallow, a movement so minuscule that you’re shocked you notice it, but you feel your head jerk back slightly in response. You feel like he’s challenging you to something, to make a move or say something to clue in your other friends into what he’s doing, but you just sit there, waiting. 

At the exact moment you bring your bottom lip between your teeth, he moves. His hand slides up further, cupping your knee with his entire palm, as his fingers brush against your thigh in a way that would be comforting if it wasn’t for how confused you were. 

You notice quickly how much you like the feeling of his hand, the realization flooding through your chest so quickly, you pray it doesn’t show on your face. His fingers are slightly calloused, gentle but firm as they dimple your skin, and his touch makes goosebumps raise on your skin, and from the way his eyebrow darts up quickly towards his hairline, you know he feels it. 

A sharp intake of air goes through your nose when he slides up your thigh, his hand getting more confident as he starts to roughly grope at your flesh, but his face stays as blank as ever. Your facade drops as you finally toss him a look of confusion, but he just continues to knead your tensing muscle until you feel his fingertips start to push under the hem of your dress. 

You stand too quickly on wobbling legs as a hiccup of shock bubbles from your lips, and you have to place your hand on the table to steady yourself as his hand falls away. Jeno and Haechan’s conversation dies as they turn to look at you in shocked concern, but all you can focus on is the way Jaemin’s head tilts back, his face finally pulling into a look of sleazy pride as he watches you in amusement. 

“I um,” you try to speak, your voice coming out cracked and quiet before you clear your throat, “I’m gonna go get a new drink,” you nod, a weak smile pulling on your lips, “your taste in beer is shit, Jeno.”

He groans immediately at your words, the concern slipping from his face and getting replaced by playful annoyance, “no one told you to steal my drink you big baby,” he grunts, reaching for the abandoned bottle only to be disappointed to learn that you finished it off. 

You roll your eyes as he stares at the empty bottle longingly, his ability to sulk over anything being admirable to some extent, but you’re glad that he’s now distracted by the label as he doesn’t see the way Jaemin’s hand sticks out to brush against the inside of your thigh as you step away. 

You walk quickly away from the table, your arms lifting to cross over your chest as your thoughts swirl in your brain rapidly. You don’t look back towards the table as you push towards the bar, but you can feel the way Jaemin’s eyes follow your every move regardless. 

—

You have a new drink in hand when you feel a presence next to you, a broad chest pushing into your shoulder as you slide your finger around the rim of your glass. You stayed at the bar, taking a few sips of your drink, in hopes to collect your thoughts about what had just happened between you and the boy that had never shown any other feelings but hatred and indifference towards you since you met him. And you felt like you had formed some coherent opinions on the situation, until he pressed against your side and made every thought fly from your mind at once. 

You turn your head hesitantly towards him as he leans his side against the bar, the soft smile he wears making you even more confused as he nods. You try to smile back, but it doesn’t reach your eyes in a way that you know would be more convincing, so you just look back towards your drink with a huff. 

“I told the guys I was coming to make sure you were okay,” he admits, his voice rumbling his chest and shooting vibrations against your shoulder, “also that I wanted another drink.”

“Do you?” You ask, the question honest as you’re shocked to think he would ever finish the first one. 

“I guess,” he shrugs, leaning to get the bartender’s attention, before he looks back to you, “I’m here so I might as well.”

“Why are you here?” You ask bluntly, your eyebrows furrowing in curiosity as you look at him again, his stare just as intense as it was at the table as you make eye contact. 

“It’s a public place,” he grins, reaching to tug at your ear. 

“Why did you really come?” You ask, pulling away from his touch as annoyance builds in your chest, how casually he’s treating you suddenly making you suspicious. 

He hesitates for a moment, his face twitching as if he’s debating whether or not to tell you the truth, before he smiles again. 

“Jeno told me you were coming,” he nods, pushing his tongue against his cheek as he hums. You don’t respond, instead you just stare at him in confusion as you wait for him to elaborate, “and you think I don’t have a life,” he continues, making you tense, “so… here I am. Having a life.”

“Jaemin,” you start, speaking genuinely for once as it starts to feel like everything that conspired between you earlier happened in an alternate dimension, “you’re a good guy,” you try to reassure, feeling a small inkling of guilt about your earlier words, “you don’t have to be Mr. party animal just because you’re in college.”

“No,” he agrees, with a sigh, “but you clearly seem to think I’m some boring goody two shoes.”

“Jaemin, why do you care what I think?” You ask as you take a sip of your drink, “we’re not even friends.”

You see a flash of something on his face when you say this, but he covers it quickly and just leaves you more confused, “what if I showed you that I’m not some loser who just sits in the library all day?” He asks as he steps closer to you, lowering his voice as he locks his eyes onto yours, “I can prove to you that I can cause as much trouble as Jeno.”

“You don’t have to prove anything to me,” you argue, the mention of your mutual friend making you shake your head as you try to think of a correlation, “when has my opinion ever mattered to you?”

“I’d give the exact date if I could,” he mutters as he reaches to grab your wrist, and before you can even question what he could possibly mean by what he said, he’s pulling you from the bar. 

Your drink clatters from your hand as you stumble on your feet, and in a panic, you try to reach to catch it, but as he tugs you through the mass of people trying to squeeze into the now empty spot you leave, you abandon the glass as you try to keep up with his long strides. He steps so quickly and with so much purpose you trip over your feet and earn a few elbows in your sides, but as he leads you to a familiar door, you can’t help but focus on wondering where this is going. 

“Why are you taking me to the bathroom?” You ask without thinking, speaking loudly over the music and causing strangers to turn to you two in confusion. He ignores your words though, and before you can try to interrogate him further, he’s pushing open the door and pulling you in. 

You gasp as you stumble into the room, surprised at the rough way he handles you as well as the fact that no one’s inside. You’ve been in this bathroom enough times in your college career to know that it usually has at least one or two drunk girls in it, either crying in a stall or fixing their makeup, but as Jaemin turns to lay his back against the door, you realize quickly it’s just you two alone. 

“Now can you tell me why we’re in the bathroom?” You sigh, laughing gently to cover the nerves that bloom in your chest as your eyes trail over the obscene amount of graffiti that covers the walls. 

Your laughter trails off awkwardly as he just continues staring at you, and you come to realize you somehow prefer when Jaemin is mean to you rather than when he’s silent. You didn’t love the fact that Jaemin hated you, but you had at least come to find it amusing; him staring silently just made you feel anxious and small. 

You feel like weak prey as he starts stepping over to you, his steps slow and calculated as he eyes your entire body. You want to ask something else, to fill the quiet of the bathroom with something other than just the muffled music and voices that slip under the door, but your voice dies in your throat as he gnaws on the inside of his cheek in thought. 

Your arms cross over your ribs as you hug yourself anxiously, shrinking slightly when he stands in front of you. You try to hold eye contact with him, trying to read whatever thoughts he has swimming in his head, but the intensity he holds in his glare licks at your skin until you're forced to turn your eyes towards the floor. 

You tense when you feel his fingers brush against your jaw, a reminder of how they felt gripping your thigh flooding into your mind and making you pull in a deep breath. You stay frozen in your spot as his hands trail across your skin, his thumbs pushing gently into your cheeks, before his palms lay against the sides of your neck. He squeezes at your skin, forcing your head back up slowly until all you can see is his blank expression, the lack of emotion he shows making your lips part slightly. 

You stumble back slightly as he pushes himself into you, and it takes a few seconds for your brain to register that his lips are pressed tightly against yours. He kisses you roughly, your teeth clacking together and rattling your skull, and you reach quickly towards his chest in an attempt to steady yourself. 

You grunt in confusion against his mouth, your eyes fluttering as the voices in your head debate on whether or not to kiss him back. The last remaining sliver of rationality in your mind screams at you, begging for answers and to understand the way he’s acting, and with a sharp breath, you finally gain the strength to push your bodies apart. 

His hands remain on you as you stare at him wildly, your mouth opening and closing as you try to find your voice, but the way his tongue darts out to lick your lipgloss off his lips makes your thoughts stutter. Your fingers dig into and curl around the fabric of his shirt, a need to pull him back to you making your arms twitch, but before you can make the move, you blurt out the first words that come to your mind. 

“What the fuck is up with you tonight?” You ask, your voice exasperated and winded. You stare at him, your eyes darting around his face as you silently beg him for answers, but when he just smiles in response, anger bubbles in your chest. 

Every emotion you’ve ever felt for the boy that clings to you floods your system; your annoyance when he makes mean comments, your amusement when you get on his nerves, and even the weird underlying arousal you’ve felt towards him whenever you paid too much attention to how handsome he was. But all of it was just always met with his clear indifference towards you, so why was he doing these things to you so suddenly? Accusing him of not having a life wasn’t even close to the rudest thing you’ve ever said to him, so why was that his tipping point? And why was groping your thigh and kissing you in a dirty bar bathroom his response?

“Does it bother you?” He whispers, his voice becoming rougher and making your hands twist tighter into his shirt, “I thought you liked making me mad?”

You want to respond, to ask him something that will give you clarification of where his head was at, but he doesn’t give you the chance to formulate a coherent sentence before his lips are pressing against yours again. 

You don’t push him away this time, your resolve breaking as he licks at your mouth. You lean into him instead, your mouth falling open as he starts to walk you backwards, and you tuck the question of what was it that I said to make him act like this into your pocket for another day. 

You feel breathless as his tongue dips into your mouth, his hands pushing tightly into your skin so you can’t pull away even if you wanted. You jerk slightly when your back bumps into the wall of one of the stalls, smacking your shoulder painfully into the edge as he blindly guides you to step into the small space. You hear the high pitched creaking of the stall door as he reaches one hand to pull it behind him, and as he pushes you to lean against the cool metal wall, you hear him slide the rusted lock into place. 

When his hand returns to your body, he pushes it against the curve of your back, pulling you closer to him as he grunts into your mouth. You pant when he finally detaches his lips from yours, your lungs begging for oxygen as he tilts your head back and licks at your jaw. His teeth scrape against your skin harshly, and as he pushes his leg to rest between yours, you let out a grumbling plea of his name. 

He bites roughly at your neck, stopping only to suck at patches of flesh until it stings. You feel your hips start to tilt towards his thigh, searching for friction as he abuses the skin that protects your drying throat, and when he smooths both his hands down your body until they rest on your ass, he digs his fingers into your skin to hold you still. 

You mumble pathetically, moving your hands to wrap around his shoulders as you try to shift your body in his hold, but all he does is smile against your skin as he drops his head to lick between your collarbones. 

“You think you deserve anything?’ He asks with an amused scoff, kneading at your ass until your dress starts to lift, “I’m doing this because I want to, not because you’re asking.”

His nails dig into your skin as he speaks, his head lifting again to lick at the shell of your ear as he pulls your thighs further apart. Your underwear shifts tighter against your body as he moves you as he pleases, the fabric sticking to your skin and making you gasp as you realize how wet you’ve gotten, and it feels like you might start falling apart if he doesn’t do something more. 

“Jaemin, you’re a good boy,” he grunts in your ear, mocking your voice and words from earlier as he moves to tug your underwear upward, “and good boys don’t do stuff like this right?”

You whimper quietly, the fear that he’ll stop making your hips squirm against his hold. You would take back what you said if you could, if it meant him giving you what you need now, but you can’t help but wonder if he’d even think to do this if you hadn’t said it in the first place. 

“How wet are you?’ He asks crudely, pressing his nose into your temple as he bites down on your cheek, “how badly have you ruined your pretty little panties for some boring little bookworm?”

Your head bumps dully against the wall behind you as you tilt it back in frustration, a small huff slips from your nose as your body heats up in embarrassment. You don’t want to answer him, the way he throws your beliefs back into your face making you feel stupid for ever thinking it, but you would never said any of it if you knew what he could do to your body. 

You jolt when his hand swats at the skin of your ass, the way he holds his palm and fingers flat making the sting bad enough that you let out a small squeak, and when his fingers immediately move to scratch at the tender skin, a sob deflates your chest. 

“No wonder you’re such a bad student,” he clicks his tongue, “you can’t even answer when someone asks you a simple question. Guess I’ll have to find out for myself.”

He keeps his nails sunk into your skin as he drags his hand to the front of your thigh, leaving angry scratches in his path. You feel the painful throbbing between your thighs, and when his traces over the seam of your underwear, you grit your teeth and whine. 

The way he continues to bite at your skin feels like a punishment, his teeth scraping at your face and jaw making stabs of pain spread throughout your nerves, but it doesn’t hold a candle to the dull ache you feel in your core. You need something, but how his fingers feel tickling at the inside of your thigh stops you from voicing any demands. 

He lets out a rumbling groan when he presses his middle finger against the damp spot that’s formed at the seat of your underwear, the sound deep and loud around you and making your heart flutter in your chest. And when he starts to circle it and pushes until he shoves the fabric shallowly inside you, your thighs tense and clamp around his hand. 

“You’re ruined,” he confirms, sounding proud and cocky over how your arousal seeps through and sticks to his finger, “it’s dripping down your thighs.”

You mumble in shame at his words, the way he chuckles softly making you let out a soft hum of his name. One of your shaking hands falls from his shoulder, wrapping around his wrist as you suddenly want to pull him away, but you feel his forearm flex immediately, keeping his hand where he wants as you fall apart. 

He grabs roughly at the crotch of your underwear, twisting and pulling up on the thin fabric until it digs into your sensitive clit. It’s a weird feeling, not enough movement or friction to give you any relief, but from the sounds that roll from the back of his throat, he must be more than pleased from how the sensation makes your face twist. 

He forces the fabric in place for another moment or two, tugging on it just enough to make your breathing pick up as your knees buckle, before he finally pushes it out of the way. You cringe when his fingers finally slip against you, the sticky sounds that attack your eardrums as he smears your arousal around making you much too aware of what you already knew. 

“So good,” he praises, prodding at your entrance as he drops his forehead onto your shoulder, “so fucking slutty and perfect.”

You both sign when he sinks his fingers inside you, two of his long digits stretching you open as he curls them gently. He pushes slowly, taking his time to feel the way you wrap around him, and when you clench softly he lets out a hiss of approval. 

He shifts slightly, straightening up and pulling the hand that was still pressed against your back until it rests around your throat. His fingers drum against the side of your neck, testing the waters for a moment, and when they finally push against your veins, your eyes fly open again in shock. 

He pushes you tightly against the wall, keeping you in place as he stares into your eyes, and when he can see them glass over from how dizzy you’ve become, he starts to drag his fingers out of you. 

He seems fascinated by how your face reacts to the friction, even the smallest twitch in your features making him tilt his head and grumble under his breath. But when he shoves his fingers back in too quickly for you to handle, he smiles at the way your mouth falls open. 

He starts fucking you quickly with his fingers, the pace rough and overwhelming and makes your legs shake. You twist your hand that still wraps around his wrist as you try to get him to slow down, but he’s too strong for your weakening muscles, and he pushes easily past your tightening grip. 

“Take it,” he commands, spitting the words quietly into your face as shakes your neck slightly, “you’re gonna fucking take it.”

You cry out as he parts his fingers inside you, the sound coming out broken and strained as your hips start rocking sloppily. Your nails dig into his wrist, your eyes starting to roll back, and all you can do is give him control of your body as you start to melt in his hold. 

You can’t control the volume of the noises that break mindlessly from your throat, the wet sounds that come from between your legs being the only thing to combat how your moans bounce around the metal walls. You want to calm down, to find your bearings and keep some decorum, but when he tilts his wrist to push the heel of his hand into your neglected clit, the last remaining bits of sanity and awareness slip from your body. 

The pleasure comes on too fast, the tightening knot in your belly forming too quickly and making your vision blur. You can barely make out the details of his determined face, but the vulgar words that spill out in a jumble off his tongue is enough to let you know much he dreamed of seeing you like this. 

You bounce in his palm, the lack of control he has on your hips making you move wildly and without rhythm. You can feel now the arousal he claimed was dripping down your legs, but your mind is too far gone to be ashamed of it anymore. 

“You’re such a mess,” he sighs, keeping his fingers steady and quick no matter how much you squirm against him, “you’re gonna come so hard it drips down my arm aren’t you?”

You pant and moan without thought, agreeing with him with mindless hums as you try to nod against his fist, and as if waiting for your acknowledgment, you feel the promise of your orgasm start scratching down your spine. 

Your breath comes out in short, sharp huffs as your stomach starts to flex tightly, the way your toes curl into your shoes making the arches of your feet ache. You try to hold off, to control the way you react as the reality of where he has you weighs on your shoulders, but as he pushes the tips of his fingers into the spot that makes your blood rush loudly in your ears, you feel pleasure crashing down on you all at once. 

Your sounds are muffled as he leans forward to press his mouth against yours, his tongue licking past your teeth until he can brush it against yours crudely. He kisses you messily, eating the moans you let out as if he needs them to survive, and as your back arches away from the wall, you feel your combined saliva drip down your chin. 

He keeps his hand moving against you, fucking you roughly through your orgasm as he rolls against your sensitive clit. You finally let go of his wrist, the overstimulation of your nerves becoming too much, and you move until both your hands are clinging to his shoulders in the need to keep him close. 

He slows down when he hears the begging whimpers you let out against his lips, his fingers pushing gently until they slip out and start to pet at your heated skin. He continues toying with you, coating you in the evidence of your orgasm, and he smiles when you let out a hiccup every time he brushes your buzzing clit. 

You're still swimming in the afterglow of his body against yours, clinging to him desperately as the fear of what will happen after his lips slip away from yours tries to clear the fog that wraps around your mind, when the bathroom door creaks open. You barely hear it, not registering what it means as his fingers still tap against your neck, and you're too lost in the taste of his lips to hear the heavy footsteps approaching the stall. 

The loud banging that rattles the door makes you both jump, Jaemin having the awareness to pull away from the kiss, but not enough to stop sliding his fingers against you. You try to slam your thighs together, trying to push him out and away, but he looks too unbothered by the interruption for your liking. 

“Come on kids,” a deep, unfamiliar voice speaks from the other side of the door, “this isn’t a classy establishment, but you still can’t do that shit here.”

If you could crawl into a hole and die at that moment, you would, but instead you just curl into Jaemin’s chest in shame. He finally pulls his hands away, releasing your throat to hold gently at the back of your head, and you grumble in annoyance when you feel laughter shake his chest. 

You move towards the door when you hear the stranger step away, your skin heated and your hands falling to push at the hem of your dress as the need to run away from the room overwhelms your senses. Your limbs feel too heavy, and your weak legs make you stumble, but you scramble to be presentable enough to face the room full of strangers. 

“Hey, wait,” Jaemin stops you, his hand moving to grab your arm and you cringe at the feeling of your arousal that still sticks to his skin. You tense as he pulls you back, your anxiety rising at the idea of talking about what just happened, but you huff in annoyance when he just slams you back into his chest. 

“What are yo-“ you try to ask, pushing against his arms as you try to squirm away, but he wraps an arm around you tightly as he slinks to squat behind you. You say his name, your voice scandalized as you feel him pushing your dress back up your hips, “we have to go.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he blows you off, using his free hand to drag your underwear down your thighs. He taps carelessly at the back of your knees when the fabric pools around your feet, and you jerk in shock enough for him to slip the still damp article of clothing from under you. 

He stands quickly, letting you go and allowing you to whip around with an angry furrow in your brow. You move to fix your dress again in confusion, and when he twirls your underwear around his fingers and offers you a sleazy grin, your hands twitch in the need to hit him. 

“Call it a memento,” he shrugs, holding your underwear out as if to appraise them, before he shoves them in his pocket, “my own little souvenir.”

—

You stumbled out of the bathroom quickly, an annoyed grimace on your face and a grinning Jaemin hot on your heels. You returned to the table, feeling incredibly exposed from the lack of underwear beneath your dress, but grateful as Haechan and Jeno seemed too drunk to notice how long you were both gone and the fact that neither of you returned with drinks. 

You didn’t talk anymore to Jaemin, even though you left the bathroom with way more questions than when you entered, and you continued not talking to him for the next few days. You texted Jeno, asking him to tell Jaemin that you would have to skip your tutoring sessions for a while, and you made sure to dart out of the room before him anytime you were in the same class as him. 

You weren’t sure why you were avoiding him, maybe the shame of what you two did was just too much for you to look him in the eyes, but that didn’t stop you from itching for an answer. You found yourself staring at him in class, drilling holes into the side of his face as he listened to the lecture in oblivion, as if you’d find some kind of answer lingering on his form. 

It was about a week later when your curiosity became too much, and the way you were constantly using Jeno to cancel your tutoring sessions felt too childish. He had sent you a text, asking you if he needed to relay anything to Jaemin, and you felt almost crushed at the fact that he was anticipating you being a big baby. Not that he knew why you were canceling, you hadn’t told him what happened and you assumed Jaemin didn’t either, but it all made you feel a little foolish. 

Which is how you ended up back in the library, staring blankly at the door of the private study room as if there was a carnivorous animal behind it, rather than just Jaemin. 

You cringe as the door creaks open, your hand so tight around the handle that it makes your fingers ache, and when you peek around the edge of the door, you see him sitting there studying quietly. 

He turns quickly, his face flush as he squeezes his pencil in his hand. All the confidence and slyness he held in his features the other night is gone, and is replaced by a soft nervousness instead. 

You watch each other intently, neither of you speaking as you see his shoulders tensing as you step into the room. You feel how clammy your palm has gotten after you pull your hand away from the door handle, and you clench your fingers together to relieve some of the stiffness. 

“Hey…” he speaks slowly, testing the waters and visibly relaxing just a bit when you smile softly at him. 

You notice almost immediately how he’s pushed his chair as far to the end of the table as he could, your heart sinking slightly when you see the chair left empty for you has faced the same fate at the other end. You respond just as quietly as you pull out your seat, and you can hear him tapping his pencil on the table when you move it closer to him. 

“Am I allowed to get closer to you?” You ask, trying to break the tension with a nervous laugh, “or are you gonna jump on me for skipping out on tutoring?”

You see his eyes widen at your words, his mouth falling open and closing a few times before he lets out a breath, “yeah I just didn’t know…” he stumbles, “I didn’t mind you skipping.”

“It probably just confirmed you thinking I’m a shitty student, right?” You tease, moving to hit him playfully for a moment, before you reconsider and shrink back as you sit. 

“I don’t think you’re a shitty student,” he argues quietly, turning to you and offering you a soft smile, how genuine he sounds making you shift. 

“That’s not what you said at the bar,” you huff, the words coming out of your mouth before you can stop them. If the tension was thick when you walked in, it thickens even further with you mentioning that night, and you mentally kick yourself for bringing it up. 

He falls quiet again, his eyes turning towards the table as thoughts move through his head. You want to eat the words out of the air, rewind time and never bring it up, but instead you’re just forced to sit there and stew in your lapse of judgment. 

“I said some stupid shit that night,” he mumbles, tracing his pencil against his paper and watching it like he’s hypnotized, “did even stupider shit.”

“So you regret it?” You hesitantly ask, keeping your eyes trained on the side of his face in hopes of catching the smallest movement or reaction. 

“Yes,” he breaths, tilting his head back to stare at the ceiling, oblivious to the way your chest tightens, “and no,” he sounds strained, confused as he filters through his thoughts, “I can’t sit here and act like I didn’t enjoy it, but I can’t help but feel like a bad friend.”

“Why would you feel like a bad friend?” 

“Because you know,” he grumbles, moving his hands in front of him as he speaks, “it kind of intrudes on whatever you and Jeno have going on. Not that I know what you two have going on, but to make a move like that on you was kind of a dick head thing to do.”

You jerk back at his rambling, his words coming out too quickly and making your mind take a moment to register what he means. But even when you collected everything he said in your mind, you’re left even more confused than you did that night. 

“What are you talking about?” You interrupt, his shoddy defense and explanation coming to a halt as his head whips towards you, “there’s nothing going on between me and Jeno.”

“What do you mean what am I talking about?” He asks, his eyebrows pulling together tightly as his voice pitches in confusion, “you and Jeno!”

“What about me and Jeno?” You lean towards him, matching his volume as you resist the urge to grab and shake him, “Jeno is my friend.”

“I know that,” he says in frustration, leaning closer to you as well, “but you’re also kind of more than friends, right?”

“No,” you say quickly, shaking your head, “did Jeno say something to you to make you think we were?”

“No,” he says shyly, shrinking back slightly in shame, “but I see the way you two act, and I just thought… you’re always texting and hanging out, and the fact that you never say anything to me directly, it’s always through Jeno.”

You stare at him in shock, the jealousy that drips from his words making your brain feel like it’s coated in mud. 

“Jeno is just fun to get drunk with,” you defend, “and he texts everyone, that doesn’t mean there’s something going on between us,” you feel lost as you speak, the accusations he throws at you making you feel flustered, “and you hate me! So why would I go to you directly?”

You watch as emotions shift across his face, the hope that picks up his features when you confirm you and Jeno are just friends makes your chest warm, but it’s short lived when he deflates at the last thing you say. 

“I don’t…” he groans, moving his hand to roughly swipe at his face, “I’m such an idiot.” 

You move your chair again, bringing it closer to him and forcing yourself into his space before you reach to pull his hand away. 

“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” You ask sternly, the confusion getting too much for you to deal with patiently anymore. 

“You’re going to think I’m an asshole,” he warns, hesitating until you throw him a look that tells him you already think that exactly, “I… when I first met you, I really liked you,” he confesses, his body relaxing as if truth takes a weight off of him, “but you were already friends with Jeno and I thought you were into him, so I figured if I distanced myself from you then I wouldn’t have to think about it. It was just a stupid crush so I didn’t think it was that big of a deal, but when it didn’t go away, and I had to start tutoring you,” he groans in frustration, “I just ended up being a dick to you instead. I feel like a stupid middle schooler, but that’s just how it ended up.” 

You both sit quietly when he finishes speaking, his body visibly shaking slightly as you stew in his explanation. Was it incredibly stupid and immature of him? Yes. But the way you haven’t been able to stop thinking about him, the way he looked at you and touched you, blurred your rationality and made your heart thump wildly in your chest. Even the way he treated you before that night always gave you a weird rush of excitement whenever you were near him; it made shame settle over you, but it still couldn’t fight the urge you felt to accept his confession blindly. 

“If you thought there was something between me and Jeno,” you start, avoiding acknowledging his confession to give you more time to think, “then why did you do what you did the other night?”

“Alcohol?” He tries, sounding unsure and unconvinced as if the word doesn’t fit right in his mouth. 

“Jaemin, you only had one drink,” you hum, rolling your eyes as he starts to beat around the bush again. 

“I’m… very stupid?” 

“You’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met,” you cut him off quickly, throwing him a disappointed look as you roll your eyes, “try again.”

You can see panic settle behind his eyes, the first inkling of fear that you’ve ever seen him show, and it makes concern settle in your stomach. He plays nervously with his fingers, shifting in his seat and sucking in a deep breath before he speaks again.  

“I don’t know,” he speaks honestly, reaching to finally touch you with his hand resting gently on your thigh, “there was just something about what you said that day,” he grunts at the memory, brushing his fingers against your skin as if it helps him think, “and it wasn’t just you saying I don’t have a life, I kind of agree with you on that one, but it was the fact that kept reiterating how good of a guy I am. Even after how I treated you.”

“But you are a good guy,” you defend quietly, moving your hand to lay across his, “I didn’t mean it as a bad thing.”

“I don’t think being a good guy is a bad thing, I try to be a good guy all the time,” he rushes to elaborate, turning his hand to tangle his fingers with yours, “I just… I know good guys aren’t your thing. I let everything get to me, and the way Jeno just laughed when I told him about our argument, I felt like I had something to prove.”

“Maybe you are stupid,” you sigh, trying to keep a straight face until his hand tenses around yours and he jerks back in offense, making a soft smile pull on your lips, “you never had to prove anything to me, and maybe I’m fucked up, but even when you were being a dick I still couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

He bites harshly on his lip, shaking his head in disbelief, “thought about me how?” He asks hesitantly, nervous that the conversation will turn against him, but ready to accept it in shame. 

“When I’d zone out while we were studying,” you start, leaning to whisper softly in his ear, hoping to smother your nerves with faux confidence as you pull your connected hands towards your chest, “all I was thinking about was how your hands would feel on me, and how badly I wanted you to do whatever you wanted to me.”

You watch as a shiver runs up his spine, his nails digging into your skin as his eyes slide shut, “I don’t deserve that,” he mutters, wallowing in doubt as images of you crumbling beneath him flutter through his mind. 

“No,” you agree, moving your free hand to brush against the side of his face, “but that didn’t stop me from wanting it.”

You pull him closer before he can respond, your heart jumping to your throat as you press your mouth softly against his. It feels wrong, like you’re doing something you’re not supposed to, but the familiar taste of his lips warms you enough that you can’t even think about pulling away. 

He deepens the kiss quickly, his hand that’s not squeezing almost painfully around yours reaching to push tightly against the curve of your back. He moans quietly, the sound making your jaw fall open, and when he licks desperately into your mouth, you respond with a moan of your own. 

He forces you out of your seat, guiding you with his palm as he keeps his lips locked to yours. You fumble slightly, your eyes fluttering and making you clumsy to your surroundings, but once he pulls you to straddle his lap, you sink comfortably against his chest. 

Your tangled fingers fall apart as he sucks your bottom lip between his teeth, your arms stretching to curl around his neck as he slides his hands up your side. His fingers tap rhythmically against your ribs, making you curl into him and sigh, but when you feel his hips start to jerk, you tense. 

His palms smooth down until they rest on your hips, the way he pets at your body making a warmth roll over you, and when he pushes down on you until you feel his bulge slide over the crotch of your underwear, you breathe out in surprise. 

“Can’t,” you mumble against his lips, your voice coming out winded and unsure as he guides you to grind against him slowly, “can’t do it here.”

“Why not?” He asks, playful arrogance coating his words, “after you went on about fantasizing about me in this room?” He taunts, using your confession against you, “you shouldn’t have started something you couldn’t finish.”

Jaemin’s ability to go from stoic and shy, to this other being of confidence and shamelessness gave you whiplash, but it also made you melt in his palms. You want to push him away, beg him to take you to your apartment and do whatever he wishes there, but as his fingers grip at the fabric of your skirt and force you to move faster, you can’t imagine having to pry yourself off of him. 

“Don’t want to get caught,” you argue, your body working against your words as you start moving on your own, “someone coul-“

“No one will catch us,” he interrupts, reassuring you as he tilts his head down to kiss down your chin, “we have the room booked for an hour,” he reminds, licking at your jaw, “and it’s better than you letting me fuck you open in the bathroom, yeah?”

Your head falls back at the memories of that night, his tongue smoothing over your throat as you remember how his fingers felt inside you. You bounce more eagerly against him, and when he bites down harshly on your skin, you thread your fingers in his hair and groan. 

You whimper as his greedy fingers brush against the hem of your shirt, his cold skin making you hiss out a swear as they push under the fabric and crawl towards your chest. The first knead against the swell of your flesh is rough, desperate as if he’s dreamed of feeling you under him like this, and when he tugs the cup of your bra away from your body, he immediately pinches your nipple between his knuckles. 

He shoves your shirt up until it bunches under your armpits, the cool air of the room brushing against your partially exposed chest as he ducks down to replace his fingers with his tongue. He laps quickly at your stiffening skin, and when he uses one arm to pull you close again, he wraps his lips around your nipple and bites down. 

You squirm in his hold, pained pleasure spreading across your chest as he abuses your skin with his mouth, and all that fills your ears are your small whimpers and the slick sound of his saliva bouncing against the walls. 

You barely register his free hand tickling down your body, his mouth encapsulating your skin and taking all your attention as he slips his fingers under the hem of your skirt. He gropes mindlessly at your thigh, squeezing roughly at your flesh before he moves to tug at the seam of your underwear. 

You gasp out when his fingers dip into you, his wandering digits slipping to prod at your entrance as he groans against you. You can hear the slick noises of your arousal dripping around his fingers, and when he drags it up to smear it around your clit, your body trembles in his hold. 

“I missed this,” he hums, keeping his lips pouted against your chest as he mumbles without thought, “all I thought about for days, just thinking about how warm you were when I had nothing but my hand.”

You buzz at the thought of him touching himself while thinking of you, the image amplifying how he circles his calloused fingers around your clit. You tilt your hips down to grind against his hand, trying to meet his patterns as you lament not being able to have him sooner. 

You whine when he takes his hand away from your skin, his fingers curling around the seat of your underwear as he pushes it aside, and when you feel the way the denim of his pants brushes against your sensitive skin, your thighs tense around his. 

The sound of him messing with the button of jeans makes you pant in excitement, your fingers pulling roughly at his hair as the metallic sound of his zipper falling open hits your ears. You feel a hunger deep in your belly, a nervous anticipation building in your chest, and when he tugs clumsily at his pants and underwear, it feels like the room around you falls away. 

You feel his length brush against your skin as he pulls himself from the confines of his underwear, the small amount of friction making you both hum and twitch. You glance down as he pushes himself against his stomach, and the size of him wrapped tightly in his fist makes you tilt his head back until your eyes lock together. 

“Please Jaemin I-“ you babble wildly, shifting your body forward until you can grind against the underside of his length, “please, need it.”

“Calm down,” he shushes you, running his hand softly up and down your back as he brings you to press against his chest. 

He handles your body carelessly, moving you how he wishes as he lifts you slightly above him, and when he pushes himself against your entrance, your eyelids flutter. He sinks you down slowly, stretching you open around him, and when your thighs start to shake and broken sighs fall from your mouth, he moves both hands to hold against your sides. 

“Slow down,” he warns as you accidentally shift down, his head tilting so his lips can brush against yours, “don’t hurt yourself.”

You let him pull you down gently, his skin sliding against yours as your arousal drips around him. You feel your body weaken and go lax in his hold as his size overwhelms your senses, and he mumbles soft praises against your lips as his fingers dig into your skin. 

He presses his mouth into yours again once he’s fully seated inside you, the way you clench and shift around him making him smile against your lips, and when he feels the heavy breaths of air that puff from your nose brush his skin, he moves his hand to grab your ass. 

He keeps you still for a moment, reveling in the way your body flutters around him, but when your hips start to jerk as if they have a mind of their own, he grunts in amusement. The way his hands feel against you is more than you could ever imagine, how they brush and dimple your skin makes you feel like he has control over every one of your atoms, and the way he fills you completely makes stars dance behind your eyes. 

Your movements are immediately messy as he moves you to bounce in his lap, his nails scraping at your skin and your legs shaking as you struggle to keep kissing him with the way he fucks you quicker than your fuzzy mind is prepared for. You feel your stomach tensing and your body screaming as he stretches you, but you love every moment you sink down on him with a broken moan. 

He swears crudely against your lips, the way you wrap around him making his hips jump until he’s fucking up into you roughly, and your thighs ache to slam shut as he splits you open perfectly. 

“So perfect,” he moans, his voice strained as he holds you still again, gripping your skin tightly as slams his hips against yours, “take me so well.”

Your head falls against his shoulder as the sound of your skin slapping together rings in your ears. You can feel your arousal start to stick to the inside of your thighs, and with the way he pushes as deeply as possible with every thrust has you crying out and nipping at his neck. 

You huff out when he tightens his arm around your waist, pulling you tightly as the air gets knocked from your lungs, before his tense fingers scrape along the skin of your ass. He scratches against your hip, making the skin burn and rise in his path, until he dips his hand back between your thighs in a rush. 

He presses roughly against your neglected clit, pinching and rolling the skin between his fingers as he continues to thrust against your wildly. He abuses your nerves meanly, toying with you, until he lays his fingers flat against you and starts sliding them against you sloppily. 

A rush of pleasure licks up your spine too quickly for you to handle, your body pushing against his hold as you roll against him. Your hips try to lift away from him, trying to escape his quick fingers, but he holds you tightly and keeps you pressed against his chest as you’re helpless against his touch. 

You clench around him tightly as your orgasm starts to consume you whole, cries of pleasure hitting against the skin of his neck as you sink your teeth into his flesh. He keeps his fingers and hips moving against you, fucking you through the way your nerves feel like they’re on fire, but as you drip and tense around him, he feels himself following close behind you. 

His fingers shake against you, his hips becoming messier as you writhe in pleasure on top of him. He groans and swears loudly as you flutter around him from the overstimulation your body endures, and he only makes it harder when he shifts to fucking you with deeper and slower thrusts, his length dragging and stilling against your sensitive walls as his breathing labors. 

The sound that rattles his chest as he comes makes you delirious, your head lifting like it’s filled with lead as you turn to watch his face screw up tightly. You gasp and pant softly at the feeling of him filling you completely, and watch him with a dazed look as he pushes his hips until they’re flush against you. 

You smile at one another when his eyes open back up, both of your features pulled soft and delirious as you cling to each other. You melt into him as his arms wind around you to pull you into a tight embrace, and for a moment you feel your breathing start to calm as he leans in to brush his nose against yours. 

You don’t think much when his arms tense against you, or the way his thighs continue to shift below you as you scratch your nails against his scalp. You feel warm and sated as you curl around him, but your peace is interrupted as he starts to stand on his wobbling legs. 

You squeak as he lifts you in his arms, your hands falling to grip at his shoulders as he moves you to sit on the edge of the table in front of him, and when he slips out of you, you whine at the sudden emptiness. 

You try to question him, your confusion bubbling at the back of your throat, but it dies on your tongue when he pushes you back. He looks oddly energetic as he watches over you, his fingers moving to dance along the waistband of your skirt as you stare at him with wide eyes. 

“There was one thing I couldn’t stop thinking about after that night,” he starts, his voice gravely and strained as he shakes his head, “and I’m not letting you leave this room until I do it.”

You yelp his name when he grabs your thighs, the way he tugs at your limbs making your head bump against the wood below you as you fall flat, but he ignores your exclamation as his fingers quickly dance back up your skin. 

You squirm when he grabs at your underwear, your thighs trying to slam shut as he tugs the fabric down, but the determination that makes his muscles tense overpowers you as you try to push him away. 

He gets your underwear off with ease, as if the way you kick doesn’t bother him in the slightest, and when you see the still damp cotton twisted around his fingers, you huff in frustration. 

You watch with a pout as he lifts them up with a grin, and when he presses them shamelessly against his face, you let a scandalized shout of his name. 

“You smell amazing, angel,” he compliments sleazily, his words muffled behind the fabric as he makes a show of pressing the damp spot against his septum, “do you think you taste just as lovely?”

He doesn’t present it as a question as much as he does a threat, and when he shoves your underwear deep into his back pocket, you try to push yourself up the table away from him. 

“No you don’t,” he laughs, grabbing your legs before you can get too far, “I know you can handle it.”

You whine when he drops to his knees in front of you, only the top of his head visible as you move to lean on your elbows. You gasp when he tugs you closer to his face, and at the first tap of his tongue against your entrance, your head falls back between your shoulders. 

He keeps your thighs open wide with his tense palms, a wet sound coming from between your legs as he lays his tongue flat against you, and with a shuddering sigh you realize he’s lapping at his come as it drips out of you. 

You clench around his tongue as he pushes it inside of you, the action earning you a deep growl from him that vibrates against your skin, and you wiggle as if you’re possessed from the way he curls his tongue against you. 

He’s messy as he licks at you, his saliva and the new arousal that drips from your spreading to the insides of your thighs and across the lower half of his face. He moans happily against you, holding you tightly against his mouth as he licks you clean, and once he’s gotten every drop of his come from your body, he leans to swipe the flat of his tongue up the length of your cunt. 

You hiss and sob when his lips wrap around your clit, finally being able to see the wild look he holds in his eyes as he sucks at your skin harshly. Your hips cant up roughly, trying to push him off your hypersensitive nerves, but he follows your movements easily as his eyes slide shut in pleasure. 

You sit up quickly as he rolls tongue against you, your hands flying to tug at his hair as your shoulders lift towards your ears and your mouth falls open. Your entire body shivers as pleasure takes over your senses, the heat between your thighs aching painfully as you still aren’t recovered from when he was inside of you, but even with the way you struggle against him, he happily licks at you in hunger. 

Your second orgasm builds too quickly, your feet moving to hit against his shifting shoulders as he lays his tongue flat against you before shaking his head. The sounds he makes below you are vulgar and make your skin hot to the touch, and before you can even think to beg for sympathy, you feel your body start to fall apart at the seams. 

You can’t control the sounds that spill from your lips, mindless words getting lost in the mix of syllables and broken moans as your hips start to roll against his face, and before your mind can come to terms with what he’s doing to you, your orgasm washes over you in violent bursts. 

He laps at you greedily as your hands push at the back of his skull, seemingly glad to be smothered by your body as he loosens his hold until your thighs close around his head. His eyes flutter open again, looking up at you with a look drenched in satisfaction and pride, and all of it combined makes you shudder harshly. 

You both gasp when he finally pulls away, both of you sinking back in relief as he stands back on his feet with a rattling intake of air. His face is slick with your arousal when he leans into you again, but he seems unfazed by his state as he wastes no time before pressing his mouth into yours. 

The taste of both of your orgasms that sticks to his tongue spreads across your taste buds as he licks into your mouth, and the way it invades your senses makes you sigh and twitch. You can feel the wetness on his skin transfer to yours as he kisses you hungrily, but as he pushes his hips between yours and lays his chest flush against you, you can’t find it in yourself to care. 

“You’re so perfect,” he mumbles as he pulls away in apprehension, “I will never forgive myself for acting the way I did and pushing you away.”

“Jaemin,” you huff, kissing across his face as his fingers grab at you as if you’ll slip away, “there’s no point in worrying about that now.”

You both know that’s not true, that whatever is happening between you two will need a deeper discussion, but with how you press against each other in hopes to make up for wasted time, it pushes rationality to the side. 

“I’ll do everything I can to make up for it,” he nods, looking you intensely in the eye, his still remaining desperation buzzing around him, “I’ll do anything you ask me.”

“Really?” You ask, breaking the tension with the playful tone you adopt without thinking, but he hums in agreement eagerly regardless, “then can I have my underwear back?”

“Oh,” he jerks back in shock, pausing to think, “which pair?”

“Both?” You say in suspicion, not liking the guilty look that pulls on his features. 

“Oh that’s not happening.”

[jaemanon]

JENO FOR WRONG HOLE!!

warning: dubcon, oops wrong hole, oops no pulling out, oops it hurts

“how did you get her to agree?” Jeno asks, cursing at his computer screen for freezing up again.

“uhh..” Jaemin lets out a suspicious laugh, pausing his game to explain. “I didn’t. not really.”

Jeno sits up straight as if he heard incorrectly, eyebrows twisted together. “what do you mean?”

“I mean, I just slipped it in.” his friend laughs again, grinning devilishly on the monitor. “kept whining about how it felt too good to pull out. girls fall for it every time.”

Jeno hasn’t stopped thinking about his chat with Jaemin. the words ‘just slipped it in’ continuously loop like a broken record in his head everyday.

now more than ever as you snuggle up to his side with one of his hands fitted on your ass.

Jeno’s never been one to shy away from teasing and dropping hints that he’s more than a little obsessed with your ass. whether you squirm away from his touch or not, he’ll always end up groping and kneading your bottom one way or another.

“come here” Jeno grumbles, patting your backside until you move over onto his lap.

your boyfriend’s fixation only made him more needy and desperate to stay close to you at all times; insisting that you sit on his lap even while he plays games.

you couldn’t complain, bounced in Jeno’s lap each time he screamed and argued with his friends over his gaming headset. silently you wished for him to win, he always had a mood to celebrate after snagging the highest score.

“let’s keep this one short today guys.” Jeno tells his friends, cupping one of your hips with a squeeze. he shifts beneath you, just enough to rub the noticeable bulge straining in his sweats between your butt. “I have plans.”

they mostly respond with snickers and jeers, making fun of him for once again ditching them for a girl. Jeno pecks your nape, mumbling how jealous his friends are, only wishing they could be in his place right now.

in his place, carrying you to his bed, laid out underneath him as he fixes you with a mischievous look. he’s teasing, tickling down from your chest to your navel. quirking a brow when his fingers reach the button on your jeans.

“the white panties with a little pink bow..” Jeno smiles, slowly tugging down your zipper, dragging one of his fingers across the lace lining. “my favorite, you wore these for me?”

“yes, I remembered.” you keen, maneuvered quickly out of your bottoms. your boyfriend holds open your legs, large palms smooth down the expanse of your inner thighs, gripping and squeezing the most sensitive part.

“hmm, so wet already.” he bends forward, the tip of his nose brushing against a thick wet layer of cotton fabric sticking to your slit. “could feel your pulse beating down here. always get so excited just from sitting on my lap, don’t you?”

Jeno’s laugh reverberates past your underwear, throaty and raspy compared to the breathless pitchy whine you let out. “love how you always get so wet for me.”

another needy whine lets him know how badly you want it, clawing at his biceps as he discards the rest of his clothing. Jeno cages your figure, large and hard above you. his chest muscles ripple, leading a hairless silky path down to his stiff length dangling between your spread thighs.

he pushes between your folds, holding the base of his cock in a firm grip. leisurely enjoying the pitiful moans you let out before dipping just the tip of his girth in.

“so pretty when you beg for my cock.” he says, low and scratchy. worked up just from having you sit on his groin for the past hour. he pistons forward, setting a speedy pace right away. circling your arched waist to assist his rapid motions.

“Jeno! fuck, s-slow down” you croon, bounced up and down on his thick length like a ragdoll. only encouraging his hips to snap faster with renewed vigor. creamed cock slipping out to the tip easily, his knees bury into the bed, drawing back with intent.

“ohhhhh fuck” Jeno’s neck arches back, throwing his hips forward with purpose. wet cock sneaking in past your unready rim, thrusting with more force to breech your hole enough. each vein lined around his thick Adam’s apple bulges out with the added strain. the deathly tight squeeze around his length shocking for not only you but him too. “fuck fuck, oh fuck.”

“pull it out!” you shout, sinking your nails into his pronounced shoulder muscles. pushing back with your feet pressed to the bed to get away, involuntarily pulsating and clenching down on your boyfriend’s length.

“ughh fuck,” Jeno’s eyes roll back, dropping his face forward panting harshly. he looks pained, pleasured, distraught and high on drugs. “too tight, so fucking good.”

it’s infuriating how attractive your boyfriend can look while making you suffer. from the wrinkles dipping between his eyebrows, to the way his nose scrunches and jaw hangs drawing out long whimpery moans; you can’t stop the gush of arousal from spilling out of your hole.

“h-hurts, hurts baby..” you manage to whisper, bringing your fingers up to your mouth to bite on between hisses.

Jeno’s big, stretching your rim open too much, burning painfully with each slight movement. he nods, gathering himself enough to find your face again.

“shh shhh, just a little. feels so good, so fucking tight. you can take it.” he nods rabidly, scooping the back of your neck with one hand to watch him suck on two fingers before reaching between your lower halves to rub circles on your clit. “so fucking wet, dripping all the way down to my balls.”

wetness pours from your entrance, your boyfriend smearing the mess around; lowering to the base of his size, he strokes your rim a few times. grinning to himself when you lock up around him again. “that’s it, just like that. doing so good.”

Jeno works slow at first, rolling his hips in time with each toe curling rub against your clit. cooing and praising you for relaxing and letting him glide in deeper. near his breaking point when you clench again. he sets you with an experimental thrust, filling your ass to the brim while cursing and smacking your core. “god, fuck baby. you feel so fucking good, perfect.”

“unnnghh?” you mutter incoherently, staring blearily between your bodies. gazing as he goes in and out, in and out. gnawing at the tips of your fingers to lessen each pained hiss trying to pass.

Jeno huffs out a laugh, delivering a harder thrust while palming your cunt. he lowers, shoving his forehead into yours, forcing you to look at him with your lost fucked out eyes.

“tell me you want it, come on, tell me you want more.” he grunts, licking at the fingers buried inside of your mouth.

“please…yes, w-want it.” you nod, letting out a garbled cry. fucked into faster, more ruthless with demand behind each of his pointed thrusts.

“tell me, tell me!” Jeno speeds up, shouting above the sound of your skin clapped against roughly, leaving the backs of your thighs aching for the next few days to come. pussy swollen under his palm desperately spurting more slick arousal, trickling down making a bigger mess between you.

“please, don’t stop! don’t stop fucking my ass” you moan gutturally. tossing your head back with the next slam of Jeno’s hips. a sick smirk pulls at his lips, burying inch by inch inside of your unused hole until you’re nothing but a sobbing shaking mess. “d-don’t stop..”

“won’t stop, gonna make you beg me to fuck you bent over everyday. take it again and again.” Jeno growls, growing sloppier with his thrusts. biting on your lips bumpily with every staggered motion. he growls brokenly, stilling above you, mouth twitching and teeth gritted. “so perfect for me baby, made to take my cock in every hole.”

[jaemanon]

Subtle (n.j)

❝ Your boyfriend does a lot of things right. He studies hard, wakes up on time, never forgets your birthday, and likes all the same snacks as you. On the outside, everyone notices how sweet he is as your other half but your parents would probably forbid you from seeing him if they knew what went on behind locked doors.❞

m.list | ao3 | minors dni! if you read it, reblog it.

requested by @zenlzen

wordcount ― 10.9k

pairing ―   jaemin x fem reader 

content ―  summer vacation au, established relationship, college setting, fluff, smut

note ―  first of all, lets give a round of applause to @rainyjeno​​ for stepping up to become my main beta, now i no longer have to release fics full of typos ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡)  this ended up more dirty than i was anticipating so….ur welcome. 

smut tags under cut::

Keep reading

[jaemanon]

sniff ♡ njm x reader – request

pairing: jaemin x reader

genre: pw(minimal)p smut, f x m, slice of life/established relationship au

word count: 7k+

smut warnings: explicit sex scenes, lots of sniffing & other sensory stimulations, sweat kink, handjob, thigh fucking, cum eating

author's note: yeah, yeah x2, yes, uh-huh, & ok yea you get the point — anyways, it isn't august yet but let's get jaemin month started!! >:D thank you anonnie for this cool request and for waiting so patiently i had fun fucking around w/ this one 🤭💓

────── 〔✿〕──────

It was like a premonition, a hunch– foresight almost. 

Either way, your suspicions regarding your boyfriend and his affinity to a particular sensory stimulation was right on the money. And in hindsight? You really should have just trusted your gut the moment you felt that something was up.

Not that you had a problem with it, anyway.

“Good morning, sweets.” A groggy Jaemin comes up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and bringing your back flush against his chest.  

“Mm, morning,” You sigh blissfully when he delivers a kiss into your hair, lingering there for a hair’s breadth too long before sneaking a hand under your shirt to rub circles into your tummy. “You’re not usually up this early. What’s up?”

He shifts his attention from giving you kisses to what you were doing at the moment. Sticking his lips out in a pucker to point out exactly what he was looking at without having to let you go. “Those woke me up.” 

And when you look down at the freshly baked cinnamon rolls that are resting on top of the stove, it all clicks. The brush that rests in your dominant hand is drenched with the cream cheese glaze, ready to be applied on top of the sickeningly sweet treat that floods the room with its scent. 

“Just had a craving for them, I guess.” You laugh lightly. “They just need to sit a little, but I’ll put them on a plate for us in a bit. Want coffee with it?”

“You spoil me too much.” He grins.

“I think I spoil you the right amount.” You reply, twisting yourself out of his clutches to prepare both of your meals. Bending down to the lower cupboards, you pull out a frying pan. “Go ahead and set up the table. I’ll have the rest out in about ten minutes.”

You’re met with an interesting sight when you straighten out. It seems that your instructions flew right over Jaemin’s head when you caught him bent over at the stove. His face is impossibly close to the cinnamon rolls, and if you weren’t so caught off guard by the obnoxious inhale that he takes, you’d scold him to be careful. The noise that emanates from his nose is way too ridiculous, however. A snort accompanying the strikingly different expression he’s donning. 

“Having fun there?” You ask rhetorically, yet a little skeptical as well.

His eyes widen when he realizes that you’ve been watching him, immediately standing back up and rubbing his nose with the back of his hand. “Sorry about that,” He gives you a nervous smile. “They just smell really good.”

Jaemin has always been on the sillier side. He’s the kind of boyfriend to suck your whole cheek into his big mouth, or to bite on the sleeve of your shirt to pull you in a certain direction. There was even this one time that he barked at you in public, but you only nagged him a little for that. So when you catch his eyes rolling to the back of his head, it really isn’t out of the ordinary for you.

Shrugging off any questionable thoughts, you simply carry on the rest of your morning like normal. Preparing a nice breakfast for the two of you topped off with your delicious baking. The two of you enjoy each other’s company in a comfortable silence, chewing away happily and planning out the rest of your days off.

——

The second incident wasn’t much worse, but again, hindsight. 

“Jaemin?” You call out to your boyfriend when you catch him in your room. Flicking the light switch on to see him on all fours on the bed, you see that he’s got a fistful of your sheets. When he looks back at you, he’s scrambling away to meet you at the door frame. He has that same nervous and out of character expression when he tries to saunter towards you coolly. “...What are you doing?”

It takes a few beats too long to think of an acceptable answer. “Well, I just wanted to see if I could guess what laundry detergent you use.”

“Huh.” You squint your eyes at him. 

“Is it Dawn?”  

“No, Tide. But Jaemin–” You shake your head to ground yourself. “Why are you doing that?”

“It’s a… project.” He says slowly, and you could see the gears in his head working in overdrive. “Yeah, a project. For stats. I’m collecting data on people’s preferences for detergent brands.”

“And you chose to sniff my sheets when you could’ve just asked me, why…?”

Even when you and Jaemin were harboring unspoken feelings for one another, there was never a time during his courtship where he was nervous. He was always meticulous and sure of himself. Exuding nothing but confidence when approaching you. That’s why you’re starting to grow a little suspicious when his eyes dart left and right, unsure of how to go about his next moves.

“You’ve been working way too hard. Who am I to bother you when you’re resting and watching TV?” He quickly deflects, planting his hands on your cheeks to reassure you.

“It was just a quick question, Jaem. You should never be afraid to ask me anything. Plus, I don’t think the scent would still even be there.” You look past him towards your bed where he originally was. “Don’t judge me– but, I haven’t changed sheets in like, a month. There’s no way you could’ve guessed that when it smells like y’know, me.”

Of course he knows that. 

“You’re right.” Jaemin nods. “I’ll make sure to just ask next time. But hey, good to know it’s Tide.” 

“Glad to know I could help.” You conclude with a small smile.

You guess you both have come to a consensus. Neither of you care for the topic at hand anymore when he wraps his arm around your neck, leading the two of you back to the living room to watch your show. 

As you walk down the hall, Jaemin delivers another lingering kiss to the side of your head. Tilting his head in a dreamlike state to get as much of you in as he can. Pretty eyelashes flutter shut when he gets a good whiff of your refreshing shampoo and conditioner. 

——

The third time, it becomes a little more apparent that something is up. 

“Okay, try this one now.” Jaemin comes up to you with what you think is the fourth lotion he’s had you try since the two of you arrived at the local body shop. Lifting your hands up, he squeezes a generous drop of the smooth substance into your hand. Nodding at you intently to rub it into your skin. 

Once you’ve distributed it evenly across your skin, you bring your hands to your face. It’s a nice scent– floral. “Lavender?” You ask, reconnecting eye contact with Jaemin to see that he’s looking at you just a little too eagerly. 

“Mhm,” He hums. “You’ve got a good nose. Let me see now.” He doesn’t waste any time when he grabs both of your wrists with one hand easily. His nostrils connect with your palm to inhale deeply.

You blink a few times when he pushes your hands back a little, his eyebrows furrowing together irritably. He doesn’t let go when he takes a few seconds to think, but when a moment more passes, he shakes his head. “Nope, this won’t do.”

“Hm?”

“I hate it,” He sticks his tongue out. “It’s way too concentrated. Feels fake. Go wash your hands.” He gripes while he shoos you towards the sink. 

“I thought it smelled pretty good.” You grumble while washing off the residue. 

“Nah.” He looks at you with bored eyes and a slack jaw. “I’ll find a better one.”

“Another one?” You whine, scoffing when he bobs his head at you.

The thought displeases you, knowing that you’d have to spend even more time here. When you mentioned to Jaemin that you had run out of lotion and needed to buy a new one, you meant that you were just going to run to the drug store down the street and grab your generic unscented usual. It’s done nothing but right by you. So when Jaemin decided to literally carry you into the passenger seat of his car and drive to the mall— you were once again, extremely confused.

While you were starting to develop a headache from the sensory overload of all of the candles and perfumes, Jaemin looked like he was in a candy shop. Picking up every lotion that catches his eye and contemplating if he should have you try it. His reasoning was a bit vague, but nothing that wasn't on brand for him: “I just wanna spoil my baby today, is that so wrong? Gotta make sure she gets nothing but the best.”

After what seems like tens of minutes and an absurd amount of hand washing, Jaemin comes up with another bottle of lotion. You’ve lost count already, but it’s definitely already in the double digits, and by whatever’s good and holy out there— you hope it’s the last one.

“Cough ‘em up.” He instructs, and you follow in suit. Giving him your hands, he pumps yet another droplet. “I’ve got a good feeling about this one.”

You hope so, but when you take a whiff, you realize he’s right. It’s a tropical smell, light on the sinuses yet just the right amount of sensible. It reminds you of a summer day at the beach where the ocean waves crash onto the shore.

“This one's amazing.” You give him your hand, to which he accepts it gratefully. 

And there it was again— that face. Lacing his fingers around the back of your hand, he brings your palm even closer to his nose. The pretty tip of it rubbing into the flesh of it with his chest heaving up the deeper he inhales. His mouth dropping open in an exaggerated ‘o’ when he exhales, a latent look of want in his eyes when they roll back.

“Yeah, this is the one.” He breathes out, and when the tip of his tongue flicks against your palm, you immediately twist away from his clutches.

“Jaem!” You scold him. “Not in public!”

Yet his eyes remain half lidded, taking a predatory step towards you to close the gap. The shop is bursting with people, so you feel your ears getting warm when Jaemin corners you into a shelf of products. Extending an arm to keep you from escaping, a dazed grin begins to form.

You catch a couple of high school girls looking at the two of you in the distance. One of them whispered to another while giggling, probably fawning over how handsome yet risque your boyfriend is. If only they knew that he was a bit… abstract.

You’re about to dodge any probable kisses when he brings his face close to yours, a cheeky smile stretching from ear to ear when he corners in, but just when you’re about to turn away– he shifts around you. His nose just barely grazes over the apple of your cheek and his line of vision shifting elsewhere. The arm that leaves you compromised retracts, and you find the full sized version of the summer breeze lotion in his hand. 

“Oh,” You splutter, now feeling embarrassed at your assumption that he was going to kiss you breathless in public. Not that you’d necessarily mind, but you’d like to think you have some decorum. 

And as always, Jaemin can read you like an open book. Ever so endeared by how cutely reserved you are, he pecks your cheek while you remain in your dumbfounded state. Turning behind him to lift an unamused eyebrow at the peeping girls. When they realize that they’ve been caught, the taller of the two yelps before scampering out with her friend.

“You’re really cute when you get shy.” He teases you, joining your hands together to pull you away from the shelf.

“And you’re really annoying when you make fun of me.” You pout. “Can we check out now?”

“Just a little longer, sweets. I wanna look at a few more things.” He answers, dragging you towards a display of candles. Now making it a point to check every single item, not caring to ask your opinion on if you like it or not.

The two of you remain in the little shop for another whopping twenty minutes, and you’re sure by the time Jaemin has swiped his card you’ve used up the last of your sanity. But when you two walk down the sidewalk, you can’t help the way your heart pulses at Jaemin’s pleased expression. 

You sigh at the three bags of merchandise that rest on the arm that isn’t holding you. It confuses you, you had no idea he was into this stuff in the first place. You’re more than thankful that you aren’t dating a 3-in-1 shampoo type of guy, but you weren’t aware that he was so particular about scents.

Whatever, you think. It’s not like it’s something that you need to worry about. As long as he’s happy, you’ve got no reason to complain.

——

Until it starts to get a little weird– but you start to think you might be just as weird as him. Because whatever is going on right now, you like it.

You had just gotten back from your apartment complex’s complementary gym. Hitting an extra long session of cardio to boost your stamina, even if you weren’t particularly the fondest of it in the first place.

That being said, you were sweaty. Wiping the perspiration off of your forehead with the towel that was hanging off of your neck. Still panting to rehabilitate your breathing, you quickly shove your key in and twist to stumble inside. 

It isn’t surprising when you find Jaemin has already made himself at home on your couch. You had given him your extra key ages ago, and you’re sure his own apartment was just a storage unit at this point. Looking up from his phone to catch you leaning on the door, he looks at you like you’re made up of all the stars in the galaxy. 

Clearly not bothered by your frazzled state, he immediately swings his legs sideways to fly off the couch. Skipping towards you with his arms extended wide to encapsulate you in one of his signature bone crushing hugs. 

And trust, if you weren’t drenched in sweat— you would’ve taken it with gratitude. But in fear of him pushing you away in disgust, you duck under and away from him when he tries to catch you. Gasping out loud when he crashes into the door cartoonishly.

“Jaemin!” You squeak at him, only to have him turn back to you with squinted eyes.

“Why’d you run away?!” 

“I just worked out, you goof.” You immediately retort, stifling a laugh when he plants his hands on his hips sassily. Shaking his head at you petulantly, you’re not quick enough to evade his second attack when he grabs your wrist to pull you in. “Jaem—!”

“I don’t care,” He whines, his voice raised to a bratty cadence that would annoy most but makes you melt. Catching you by your hip with his free hand, he pulls you in to shower your cheeks in kisses. With how he bombards you with affection, you’re quick to succumb to his touches. Sloppy and moist pecks along with your giggles fill the room, and you’re both too caught up in your antics.

Until his kisses lead up the angle of your jaw, making a stop at your sideburn, and then letting his nose dig into the side of your head, nuzzling deeply into your hair. Suddenly he stops, and you push yourself away to catch that abrupt switch in his demeanor. There was that inexplicable glint in his eye again, terrifying in how unreadable it is.

You part your lips to question his motives, but any chances of a proper conversation is thrown out of the window when he bends down at level with the crook of your neck, the towel that hung loosely around it is now long forgotten when it falls to the floor. Trapping you with the flat of his hand against the center of your back, you’re arched at an angle that crushes your breasts into his chest.

You were impartial to some innocent touches when you had gotten home, knowing that Jaemin has always been on the needier side. But under the instance he was in the mood for something else? You really wanted to hit the showers first. 

“Jaemin, come on–! Ah!” You squeal when rolls his tongue out to lick a up your throat, cleaning the thin layer of sweat and replacing it with his warm spit, tilting your chin up as the pink muscle reaches the tip. The hand at your back travels with haste towards your ass, gripping and kneading a handful of the flesh before bringing it down in a harsh smack. “What are you doing?!”

“Sorry sweets,” He apologizes with little sincerity before nibbling at your neck, inhaling deep yet quickly bated breaths like a dog whose owner has just come home from work. His thumbs hook into the hem of your leggings, snapping the waistband playfully to earn another gasp of surprise. “You just smell so good.” His voice drops an octave in the latter half of his words, falling down to a rough baritone that rumbles deeply in his chest. “You look even better, so pretty for me… Just wanna lick up every drop.”

His proclamation fills you with embarrassment, because you’re certain it’s the opposite right now. Yet he furthers his point when he traces his tongue along the lobe of your ear, letting it slither into the hole, allowing you to not only feel the sensations but hear the slimy appendage roll around. Everything from your hairline to the back of your thighs is drenched in sweat, you’re sure you smelled… salty.

As if he can read the worry on your face, he shakes his head. “Don’t be shy,” He says before scooping your breasts into his palms, squishing them together to lave along your cleavage. The droplets of perspiration meld together to form a small pool, to which he laps up with glee. “I mean it. I love how you smell, especially when you’re like this.” He moans, unrelenting when he pushes your fitted top over your head and disposes of it. 

It feels like steam is coming out of your ears at how lewd his actions are, enjoying you as if you were actually a meal for him to eat. “Jaem, come on, please just let me clean up,”  You manage to sputter out, your voice wavering with every caress. “I promise I’ll do whatever you want after.”

“No, I want you now.” He growls before sweeping you up and over his shoulder, latching his forearm around your knees to leave you just barely hanging off of him. Completely over exaggerated in his actions, he leads you to the couch that’s no more than a few steps away, pelting you onto the plush cushions with little regard to your landing. He’s even quicker to topple over you, hands immediately seeking purchase over your body in a heated frenzy. 

“What's gotten into you?!” 

Jaemin was never anything if not frivolous and open about his fantasies, but there’s an almost dark and gritty aura about him right now. The way he completely ignores any pleas or protests only serves to make the heat between your legs grow hotter. It’s as if any thread that’s held him together has snapped, and you’re left with a man starved. Only looking to satiate his selfish and innate desires.

“Didn’t really want you to find out, to be honest. Especially not like this.” Yet his words betray his body when he lifts your arm, holding your wrist firm in place, ogling that hollow that concaves in. When that Cheshire grin grows, your eyes widen when you’re hit with the horrible realization. “Can you blame me though? It’s your fault for making me like this.”

“Oh my god, don’t you fucking dare—” But you’re too late when he dives in, quickly bringing his lips to your underarm, licking a fat stripe upwards whilst reveling in your screech. The tips of his canines poke out in amusement, gauging your reaction as a satisfactory one. The slurp he makes is obnoxious, and the flesh feels sticky from the saliva he leaves behind. 

Your flushed expression only spurs him on even further. Of course he knows his lover like the back of his hand. Though you pathetically squirm and struggle, those fucked out eyes and that bratty swivel of your hips tells him you’re enjoying this more than you’re letting on. Such a cute little brat, he chuckles inwardly before continuing.

“Everything about you is so good, ” He croons sweetly, kissing against the surface of your underarm. “Could eat you up just like this, and you wouldn't be able to do anything about it. ‘Cause you're my sweet girl, and you do what I want when I want. Right?”

A pathetic whimper of his name slips past your lip at his assertion, unable to deny the toe-curling pleasure the foreign action is giving you. Gnawing at your bottom lip, you can’t bring yourself to push him off of you when he flattens his tongue to cover itself in your taste. He treats it with the same vigor as when he eats you out, taking in every drop desperately until you’re covered in his saliva. 

You’re mortified at how into this he is. When you catch a glimpse of the whites in his eyes, you know that he’s been holding himself back this whole time. It excites and scares you— how much filthier could his desires get? When he shifts from your underarms and reaches your collarbones, you realize that he’s too far gone. 

Squirming under his hold only gets him harder as he ruts his prominent bulge in between the crevice where your thighs meet. He was already so hard, the outline in his pants sticking out and jutting against your core with greed. It’s almost humiliating how such an unstimulating act is capable of making you cry out, how each buck of his hips only coerces another gush of wetness from you. You’re sure the lack of restriction meant that he wasn’t wearing underwear right now, because you’re sure what you’re feeling is the head of his cock getting caught on your clit.

Traveling down your body, your leggings slip off with his hands, slipping off with ease when you lift your legs for him. He’s in disbelief at the sight before him, a stringy butterfly thong that’s being sucked in by your folds. There’s nothing left to the imagination aside from your holes that he yearns to devour, but this waiting game only makes his hunger grow. He can’t differentiate the layer of slick that covers the insides of your thighs, but he wants to lick it up all the same. 

As if it couldn’t get better, you give him easier access by spreading your ankles as far apart from one another as you can. It makes him scoff, shaking his head with a pointed tick in his jaw. At your submission, you can’t see that he’s inwardly cheering at how well you accept this side of him. It fills his chest with a sort of warmth, one that he can only express in physical adoration. 

You’ve always been so, so pretty. He loves how pretty your face is, how nicely you dress yourself up, how you taste– but one of the prettiest things about you is how you smell. The scent of your body wash, or the light perfume you spray on your neck, he enjoys all of it. Yet it all pales in comparison to that heady scent that you give off. It’s natural, poignant, and at its root– pure.

Just like you, his precious girl. 

It’s all so good to him, and it’s served to him on a silver platter. He hopes that his gratitude is made clear when he crawls off of you, letting his knees drop onto the carpeted floor and delivering a teasing kiss against your already sopping panties. 

You think you’ve lost any sense of direction at this point too. Because rather than being horrified at his incessant sniffing, you find yourself lazily smiling at how much he wants you. No longer embarrassed by any thoughts of him being grossed out by something as petty as some sweat, you give in by hooking your thumbs against the skimpy string of your panties. Making a show of closing your legs flush together to roll it off.

It fills you with confidence to see just how hypnotized Jaemin is by your visage, his eyes trailing along every inch of your legs from the back of your thighs to your ankles, the lace becoming a secondary thought when you finally fling them off. Now that you’re completely bare for him, he follows. 

You find that you were right in thinking that he wasn’t sporting any underwear, because when he pushes the fabric down by the waistband his cock springs out freely. An obnoxious slap against his abs, the tip already coated in precum. No matter how many times you’ve fucked, there will never be a time that Jaemin’s body doesn’t have your pussy clenching in need.

His chest that has filled out quite nicely heaves up and down with every bated breath he takes. He watches you with an ardent need to ravish, yet a sort of apprehension indicates restraint. It’s as if he’s holding himself back from fucking you against the couch, so you have to urge him forward yourself. Hooking the front of your foot around his waist, you bring him in close. 

Though he stumbles on top of you clumsily, he’s quick to get the hint. A smirk overtakes his features, impressed at your sudden forwardness. It makes you giggle when he traps you with one hand planted at either side of your head, giving your forehead a peck. “What? Not shy anymore?”

“How could I be when I know my Nana likes me like this?” You pout, that feigned innocence and that little pet name quickly driving him up a wall. Under his gaze, you thrust yourself upward in hopes of your wet core meeting his cock, a signal that you want him to take you already. 

Even if Jaemin loves every side of you, at this moment, he thinks he wants to see you break for him. Shaking his head at you, he pins you down by the hips. Your legs that were spread just for him are quickly shut once again, the cusp of his hand beginning at the back of your knees before sliding upwards towards your ankles. 

You wonder what he’s playing at while also growing frustrated at the lack of being fucked. Trying to break from his hold, you’re easily put back into place when he slaps your exposed ass. He wasn’t gentle at all as a stinging sensation jolts up your spine and makes you squeal. When you open your mouth to chastise him, he gives you a pointed look that instantly shuts you up. 

It feels like eons before he moves, but just when you think his teasing couldn’t get any worse, he sheaths his cock right between the crevice where your thighs connect. A high pitched and mocking laugh leaves him when you gasp out for air, unrelenting as he grinds against you so intently that you can feel his balls grazing against your rim.

“Don’t even have to fuck your pussy,” His voice is gruff with want, using the pads of his thumbs to push your thighs back even further. The sweat and pussy juice mix into a nasty lubricant that lets him glide with ease, rutting back and forward to coat his cock. Letting his hardened cock slip between your folds, his leaking tip peeks through the other side. “Could just cum right in between these pretty things.” 

“Mmh, Nana,” You whimper when he increases the speed of his thrusts, the tip meeting your clit in a sensual meeting each time. That feeling of uneasiness creeps in on you again. You don’t know how you’d fare if you were to cum off of not being filled. The idea fills you with humiliation, especially since you know more than well that Jaemin would hold it over your head forever. “Nana, come on. Fuck me! Please.”

You try to paw at his shoulders, but he’s unreachable from how proudly he kneels over you on the couch. The way you quickly lose any control over the situation brings him closer to an orgasm, that familiar tightness forming in his lower abdomen. It clenches deeply, his v-line becoming even more pronounced when he sucks in a breath, loving just how powerless and needy you are. That lovely string of ‘please, please, please,’ that echoes like a song from your lips only makes him drunk on lust.

“Love it when you beg for me,” Jaemin groans. His eyes are devoid of anything but want, locked right onto the folds that hug so nicely around him. Truthfully, he could cum just like this. What with how you’re moaning like a common slut just for him and how the raunchy scent of sex permeates the room, each of his senses teeter on the edge of overstimulation. “Such a bratty, cock-hungry slut, aren’t you?”

“Only for you,” You cry, making a show of your loyalty by taking the thumb of his free hand into your mouth, letting your tongue swirl around the pad and tasting the saltiness it has to offer. “Want your cock so bad,” Your muffled words earn an amused chuckle from Jaemin.

When you look like you’re on the verge of tears, he thinks you’ve suffered enough. Popping his coated thumb from your lips, he pats your cheek teasingly. “You did so well for me, my pretty girl. Always so, so good.” He says with that saccharine coated lilt.

Your chest still burns with pride at his praises, no matter how condescending they are. You’ve conquered what you thought to be an insurmountable feat, his torturous teasing seeming like it would go on forever. But he reassures you otherwise, because for the last time he pulls your legs apart. This time he pushes them past their limits, the one that dangles off the couch is inches away from the floor, building up an aggravating burn.

Too focused on the pain, you’re unprepared when Jaemin immediately lodges himself into your hold with one fell swoop. “Nana–!” You screech when his crotch meets yours, feeling the fine hairs growing at his groin. From the start he takes on a brutal pace. You failed to realize that the teasing was a punishment on himself too, not being buried in your tight and wet walls driving him beyond mad. He’s thoughtful in every thrust, hitting that “Nana– Nana, slow down!”

That fire that was building burns even brighter when his nails dig into your calves, crescents forming into the flesh as he continues to mercilessly pound you. He pays your pleas no regard, and despite the way his cock spreads your walls almost painfully, you can’t deny that his lack of care for your well being and the feeling of being ruthlessly railed serves you by tenfold. 

When you and Jaemin lock eyes, he flashes you this dazed, almost maniacal smile. Not that it matters, you’re sure you’re giving him that same exact look right now.

Sweat is now forming along his forehead and down his neck, and it gives him this almost ethereal glow that causes a dribble of spit to trail down the side of your slack jaw. It’s more than apparent that the deep breaths that he’s taking aren’t a sign of fatigue, but rather he’s etching the pungent scent of the room into the deepest pits of his mind. The further he loses himself, the more pronounced his thrusting gets, reaching deeper and deeper every time.

You think you like being nothing more than a hole to him.

Your eyes start to roll into the back of your head when he growls, pinching and forcing any part of your body that instinctively tries to adhere to his ministrations. Going so far as to slap at your side when he grows irritated at your uncontrollable protests. “Do I have to fucking tie you up? Stay still.” He threatens, but he might be enjoying this just a little too much when he pinches at your clit, as if coaxing you into taking the bait. “You like it, huh? Like getting fucked so rough like this?”

“Love it soo much,” You slur, completely lost in a daze when he begins to circle figure eights along your bud. The same thumb that had been in your mouth moments earlier coated in an absurd amount of spit presses against you, and the sensitivity of your body has your aching each and every way. “Nanaa,” You reach out for him, wanting to hold him close.

You’re too cute to deny. With that little tremble of your lip, he’s all yours. Wrapping his forearms around your back with practiced ease, he pulls you up so now you sit right on top of him. All while remaining connected, he plants his feet down before thrusting back up into you. 

At this angle, he reaches even deeper. Grabbing the hair at the back of your head, he gives you a look of adoration that borders on obsession. He brings you in for a passionate kiss, immediately darting his tongue into your mouth, only to bite at the tip of yours. Not a second later he’s stretching it out of your mouth, sucking the appendage into his mouth with utter desperation. 

Filling two of your most intimate holes, you’re both invigorated by the other’s presence. Stimulated beyond comprehension, Jaemin makes a mental note to have a toy ready for next time– wanting to see just how deep you can fall into the pits of his depravity.

It comes before you even realize, too focused on where your tongues are fighting for access to another’s mouth. In the long time the two of you have spent together, there was no fighting the fact that there was something different about today. It was raw, both of your desires laid bare at their most vulnerable form.

To accept and be accepted was a wonderful feeling. And when you clench around his cock for the umpteenth time, he can’t help the moans that fall from his mouth into yours. Practically shaking when shots after shots of his thick white liquid spurt into you, crying out your name in praise and thanks that he’s found a lover that’s so compliant to his filthiest fantasies.

You don’t take too long to follow behind him, because despite the overstimulation, Jaemin wholeheartedly believes that reaching your high is more important than his own. The strain of his cock borders on painful when your tight pussy milks him of every drop, yet he tightens up and pounds into you at his quickest and most earnest pace. 

There’s white when your eyelids flutter shut, and that knot in your belly implodes on itself when his tip knocks against that spongy wall for the last time that afternoon. Throwing your head back in completion, the both of you are crying out at the sensation. You have to fall forward into his arms lest you fall backwards, your nails dig deep into those pronounced biceps to bring you back to earth, now beyond  with his cum leaking out of you.

You’re gasping out for air, still too fucked out with aftershocks traveling from your core and up your spine. Jaemin brings you in closer, soothing the hair at the back of your head down while cooing you into relaxation, almost worried when you spasm against him. 

“Shh, baby. I got you,” He kisses against your ear, apologizing quietly when his softening cock still twitches inside of you. “It’s okay… it’s okay. You did so good for me. Love you so much.”

“Mmh, love you too.” You say with teary eyes, wrapping your arms around him and nuzzling your head into his shoulder. With every clench of your pussy you feel him wince, and if you weren’t careful you’re sure he could go for another round. It scares you– but it also delights.

You do have something else in mind, however. Something much more important.

“Jaem?” You call out, letting your index finger trail down his spine.

“Yes, my sweets?”

“Can we take a shower?”

Truthfully, Jaemin wanted to say no. He wanted to remain inside of you for as long as time would allow him, and he even more so wanted to live with this poignant scent the two of you have created together. That sticky, sweaty, and cum mixed smell invigorates him beyond belief.

But when he sees how tired you are, having worked out only to be fucked right after, he gives in with a defeated sigh.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

––

“I’m sorry!”

“Sorry my fucking ass.”

You mock his high pitched whine, watching the two of you in the mirror with a bored stare. With one hand, you’re holding him by the shoulder. Pinning his chest down onto the sink while his ass is bent over and flush against your lower half. The other is wrapped around his once again swollen cock, a layer of your newly purchased lotion being used as a cool lubricant.

After a well-deserved shower, you and Jaemin had an important discussion regarding your unspoken kinks. The both of you came to the obvious conclusion that he had a thing for scents. 

Though that wasn’t rocket science, you were quite surprised when he confessed that he fantasizes about you taking control. It was supposed to be a conversation with no malice, but it struck a chord in you. Which leads you to a small, albeit petty argument.

“I ride you all the time!”

“Yeah, but it usually just ends in me putting in the rest of the work. No offense, sweets, but–”

“But what.”

“You’re kind of a pillow princess.”

That being said, you decided to kill two birds with one stone by pushing him over and pumping your fist along his cock with that summer scent he loves oh so much. You know you’re doing right by him, because you feel each ridge and vein that tenses with every glide. A twitch of his head that spews out blanks every time you bite against his neck, bruising the dewy skin shades of pink and purple to stake your claim over him.

“Think you deserve to cum?” You lick up his neck, your thumb circling over his tip and teasing at the hole. The hand that had him pinned down now seeks purchase against his ass, giving him a prominent smack that has him crying out in surprise.

“Yes!” He begs, bucking into your hand when you slow your pace, watching the lotion mesh so nicely on his skin. You realize he had a point in all of this scent stuff, it smells so good. “Please let me cum. I’ll be good from now. I'm sorry─ I'm so sorry.”

“That’s a good little bitch.” You grin devilishly, licking at your lips when you tug at his shaft just the way he likes. A few more pumps and he’s whining like a slut, spasming beneath you when you drop your breasts against his back, covering his mouth to quiet him down. Reveling in his sweet moans even further when you feel his tongue knitting around your fingers. Soon enough ribbons of cum are escaping his cock, launching onto the sink’s cabinets and staining them white. 

You love how pliant he is, and how he wheezes against your hand when you refuse to stop. In due time you’ve taken every drop he has to offer, and there's a gossamer thread of cum that connects your retreating hand and his cock. Taking an index finger and swabbing at his cum coated tip, you bring it to your lips, keeping locked eye contact with Jaemin’s fucked out expression and tasting the salty cum for good measure. Lapping at the dollop that remains at your palm, he almost feels jealous that you're paying more attention to yourself than him.

When he looks back at you like you're a divine blessing to this earth, the both of you come to the conclusion that no amount of time could ever make your sex grow dull. Unlocking new things every day, you can’t wait to see what heights your affairs can reach.

There's still more important matter to attend to, however.

Though he apologized, you still don’t think it’s enough. Coming in close behind him, you whisper a deceptively soft command into his ear. It causes his eyes to widen in surprise, never would he have thought you'd ask him to do something like that.

He looks over his shoulder and over at you with fear, but that cold stare only implants even more fear into him. Your word was now law, and he knows better than to disobey.

With a jagged breath, he drops down to his knees. He looks back at you one last time, as if what you asked was a figment of his imagination. It makes you tut in disappointment, so you take matters into your own hands by bringing a foot to the nape of his neck, exerting enough force to push him forward. 

“I’m waiting.” You look down at him, pushing him even lower to where his neck cranes uncomfortably. 

“Do you really want me to…?”

“I don’t think I stuttered, did I?” You tilt your head condescendingly, a grit to your words causing him to shiver, your cold attitude spurring a giddy feeling in his chest like a high school boy. 

Succumbing to your wishes, he comes face to face with the white stained cabinet. His cum is still dribbling, slowly but surely. Tasked with cleaning up his mess, his tongue lolls out, planting his hands against the surface before licking back up. All it takes is one taste of himself and one look of approval from you, and he’s now urgently lapping up any remaining cum. 

He realizes that he loves himself a lot too, because he tastes and smells so pretty too. The sight is enough to make you grin in satisfaction, crouching down to kiss the busy Jaemin against his cheek, letting your hands trail through the strands of his hair with adoration. 

“Good boy.”

end

────── 〔✿〕──────

unedited

[jaemanon]

Like The Stars Pt. 4

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4

Pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, sex lessons au, friends to lovers

Word Count: ~8,3k

Includes: high school seniors (everyone is legal of age); canon bisexual mc; side characters donghyuck, renjun, and karina; profanities; obviously, sex lessons; kind of a slow burn?; idiots in love/miscommunication sort of (you decide which one fits better); does this count as semi-public sex? they’re on a balcony; protected sex! ft. thigh riding; my precious little nonsense epilogue

Summary: you’d had a crush on renjun for as long as you could remember, but your lack of experience always stopped you from taking the first step; it’s a good thing you have your trusted friend jaemin to help you out

Author’s note: the day is upon us, i present to you the finale of this short story ! thank you so much to everyone who stuck by and loved it until the end, you’re the best <33 disclaimer: do i hate miscommunication as a trope? yes; could they have resolved things easily and cutely? definitely; did writing it this way take ten years off my life? absolutely; do i have any regrets whatsoever? nope. plz don’t hate me, ehe~ you can shout at me about it tho, if you want! second disclaimer: the movie mentioned in this is included only to serve as a plot device, also the title of the story finally makes sense yayy

When you got to school the next morning, you were early enough to assume that none of your friends, or classmates for that matter, would be there. Yet as you made your way past the window that gave free peeks into your classroom to anyone passing by, you noticed a familiar figure already inside.

“Jaem!” you beamed as soon as you entered the classroom, rushing over to cling onto his arm.

“Morning, princess,” he greeted you, ruffling your hair gently and very possibly ruining the hairstyle you had carefully worked on. You swatted his hand away playfully and glared at him. “You seem way too excited for such an early hour, what’s going on? By the way, how are you feeling, still good?”

“Better than ever,” you chuckled, pulling away to look at him with a grin. “My parents are away for the weekend, do you maybe wanna come over and keep me company for a while?”

The boy raised his eyebrows, a sound between a scoff and a chuckle leaving his lips.

“Since when do you invite me over for sleepovers and not Karina?” he asked, as if doubtful. “Or why not ask Renjun instead?” he teased after a second. “You know, I'm pretty sure he'd be happy to come, and you could spend some quality time together.”

If you hadn't spent so much time with him and his smirks for the past couple of months, you would have bought that the one on his lips right now was nothing more than teasing. But you had learned to notice the small twitch giving out that he was faking it. You couldn't help but question it in your mind, the implication that little forced smirk held, yet decided to not mention it. Instead, you rolled your eyes at him and poked his chest.

“I'm inviting you, Nana, not them,” you shook your head a little. “Of course, if you say no I’ll have no choice but to ask someone else, but I just wanted to spend time with you, y’know.”

His eyebrows shot up and he chuckled slightly, crossing his arms. And you were almost sure that whatever he was preparing to say, he would be faking that too. 

“Princess, don't get me wrong, but don’t you think that it’s maybe time to focus on Renjun now?” he questioned and your smile fell a little. He wasn't wrong, really, but you couldn't push yourself to say that Renjun wasn’t the one you wanted anymore. Not yet, not first thing this early in the morning and not in the middle of a random classroom. 

“Well, I… I know you said we’ve covered everything but… I thought that I might need a little bit more time to get used to it…” The excuse sounded dumb even to you, so you decided to use part of the truth instead. “I enjoy spending time with you, Nana. Not just when you’re teaching me about sex, I like the cuddles and the jokes and your presence around me,” you sighed and something in his posture shifted. “I know we didn't spend that much time together before but that doesn't mean we have to stop after we’ve,” you couldn't help but pause for a second to recollect your thoughts, “finished with the lessons”.

“I didn't mean it in that way, Y/N,” he said quietly, cupping your cheek gently. “I've had so much fun with you, I'd actually hate it if we stopped hanging out,” he added as a little smile curved his lips and that made you feel a bit better again. 

“We don't have to have sex tonight, or ever again, if you don't want to,” you assured him, although the thought still stung a little - you didn’t want all of it to end. “Just come over, we can watch a movie or something like that.”

“Count me in on that,” Jaemin nodded and ruffled your hair again, grinning happily and bringing back the smile on your own face. 

“In on what?” a voice suddenly joined in and you turned to see Donghyuck had just walked into the classroom. “Are you planning a party without me? I will end you both if you are. Unless it's a surprise party for me.”

“Not really a party, Hyuck,” you laughed and shook your head. “Just Jaem and me, cause I'll be home alone for a few days.”

“Ew, please keep me uninvited then,” Hyuck scrunched his nose in disgust. “The idea that you two are fuck buddies is making me question this friend group so much.”

“Bold words for someone who spent the last three years trying to get in Karina’s bed,” Jaemin retorted, laughing at the way Hyuck's face fired up.

~

The knock on your door came a few minutes earlier than the hour you two had agreed on, yet you still rushed to open the front door. 

“God, we haven't seen each other in ages!” Jaemin teased as he entered, fully aware of how excited you were and apparently that thought amused him. 

“Shut up, loser, I'm just being polite enough to not leave you hanging at the door,” you rolled your eyes.

“Of course you are, princess,” he smiled as he leaned over to peck your forehead surprisingly. It was such a domestic little gesture that it caught you off guard. He seemed to be just as startled with his own action as you were as he cleared his throat awkwardly after pulling away again. “So, what's the plan for tonight?” 

You shook away your surprise and smiled at him again as you led him further inside and let him set his stuff down in the living room.

“So, we are going to watch my favorite movie tonight and you cannot say no,” you said, nodding your head in the direction of the TV where the movie was already loaded. “I have also ordered us pizza,” you added and he glanced at the table where the two boxes were waiting for you.

Jaemin didn’t really even try to disagree with that plan and so the two of you settled on the couch, your legs thrown over his lap, and you played the movie. The opening scene of Stardust started playing and you couldn't help but smile as you watched the main character's father running away from the village he lived in to visit the magical market.

The movie went on and as much as you tried to focus on it, you started wondering if Jaeming was enjoying it. You couldn't help but glance at him every so often, just to check for any reaction. 

“Y/N, the last time I checked, the movie wasn't playing on my cheek,” he chuckled and you looked away from him immediately, embarrassed. 

“I’m just not sure whether you're enjoying it,” you pouted. Jaemin shook his head slightly in your peripheral vision.

Instead of replying, he pulled you closer to himself and made you lean your head on his shoulder. 

“There, you can't look at me now,” he said. “Watch the movie, not me.” 

A sigh left your lips but you obliged, focusing on the two main characters. One of your favorite scenes was coming soon and you smiled to yourself. The main characters were going to get caught by pirates and that meant that they would soon be realizing that they’re in love. A smile curved your lips again and you signed quietly. You felt Jaemin shift a little next to you, as if to adjust himself so you could cuddle more comfortably.

The film went on and soon you ended up tucked into his side, one of your arms wrapped around his abdomen and one of his hands playing with your hair. With your eyes on the screen and the lack of ability to check every three seconds whether he was enjoying it, the movie went by pretty quickly and before you knew it, the ending credits were playing. Reluctantly, you pulled away from Jaemin and looked at him again, waiting for his commentary as anxious tension filled you up. 

“I can see why you like the movie,” he said pensively. You blinked, unsure how to take that until he turned to you and smiled. “It’s a really beautiful story. And also, there were witches and pirates. So, you know, obviously, I love it.” You felt relief wash over you at the confirmation. 

“Glad to hear that!” you smiled. “I mean, not that you had to like it, but it’s good that you did.” 

He laughed at your comment. So to stop yourself from rambling, you refocused on cleaning up the empty plates from the table and taking them to the kitchen. When you returned to the living room, you found Jaemin looking through the window. 

“The stars are visible tonight,” he said as he turned to you and smiled. “The movie made me think about that. I’ve never actually paid them much attention,” he added. “Do you think they might be actual people living their life up there?”

“Oh, I love watching the stars!” you exclaimed excitedly. The stars had been one of your first friends, unchanged no matter where your parents took you, and always there. You had grown up looking at them whenever you felt lonely and so they held a special spot in your heart. “And, well, I haven’t had the chance to meet a fallen star myself so I don’t know what they are really,” you chuckled. “We can take some blankets to the balcony and I can show you some things though,” you offered, hopeful eyes looking at Jaemin.

He raised his eyebrows slightly as if surprised by your enthusiasm, but as he slowly approached you, a smile curved his lip.

“I’d love that, yes,” he said, ruffling your hair affectionately. You didn’t need much more of a confirmation to rush over to your room and pull out your favorite blanket. 

In no time, you two had set up a comfortable place to lay on your balcony, surrounded by a nest of fluffy blankets and a few pillows, and you were on your backs, looking at the sky. The visibility wasn’t ideal, of course, yet small sparkling dots were noticeable here and there. 

“That over there is Cassiopeia,” you pointed excitedly and Jaemin followed the direction of your finger, trying to spot the constellation. “You see? It’s those five stars that look a bit like a stretched out and messy W?” He hummed in confirmation and you could see him smile in the dim light of your bedroom over your heads as he recognized the constellation.

“Show me something else?” he asked. You could see the stars in his eyes, reflecting the ones in the sky and his excitement made warmth bubble up in your chest. You had been scared he'd find your affection for the stars dumb or ridiculous, yet here he was next to you, looking at you like you were showing him the secrets of the universe. 

Forcing yourself to look away from him before you could dwell on the growing feeling inside you, you tried to find something else that would be easy to spot. The city lights limited the options even though your family's house was kind of on the outskirts, yet your eyes did see a recognizable shape. 

“Well, can you see the five stars, like, kinda to the left above Cassiopeia, that look like a tilted kid’s drawing of a house? That’s Cepheus, Cassiopeia’s husband. They actually come from Greek mythology. They tried to sacrifice their daughter Andromeda to a sea monster because her mom thought that it’d be a great idea to boast that she’s more beautiful than the sea nymphs. It’s okay though, cause Perseus saved her and then made her his queen,” you explained. You moved your eyes again to look at him and found him already turned to you. 

“That’s kinda dark,” he grimaced, but then a smile curved his lips and he added, “but they're beautiful". You knew he was talking about the night sky and its little gems. Yet a part of you felt like the compliment was for you more than for them. 

Gently he reached over to take your hand, bringing it to his lips and pressing a kiss against the back of it. The action left you flustered, warmth once again filling you up and you couldn't bring yourself to suppress your feelings anymore as much as you wanted to.

“Jaemin…” you started, unsure what you were going to say exactly. He looked at you expectantly, a soft smile on his lips.

You couldn't make words process in your brain. The shift in your own feelings was still too overwhelming to talk about. Jaemin was one of your closest friends, and even if your sex lessons hadn’t managed to ruin your friendship, who was to say that your feelings wouldn’t. And even though you had decided to tell him, a part of you was terrified by it. In the end, you just shook your head slightly and looked up at the night sky again. 

“Look, you see that very very bright star over there?” you pointed. “That's Vega. It's the brightest star currently visible, as Sirius is below the horizon right now.”

When a response didn't come for a while, you looked at him again. He was still looking at you, some sort of inner conflict visible on his face. Suddenly, he rolled over on the blanket and before you even realized what he was doing, his body was on top of yours, his arms on both sides of your head. 

“God, you are gonna drive me crazy,” he whispered softly. 

You couldn't help but look at him wide-eyed. Never before had he done something like this, even with all of the times you had had your lessons. Yes, he had never been shy to show he finds you attractive and enjoys what you two were doing… but this was different, this felt like it was coming from something deeper than just sexual tension. Your heart skipped a beat, the feeling of hope blooming in your chest again.

“You're just sitting here, talking about some big balls of hot gas billions of kilometers away from us with this sweet smile as if they are the most amazing thing in the whole world,” he went on, shaking his head slightly. “And all I can think about is how beautiful you look in their light and how much I want to pull you on top of me and make you feel so good that you'd look at me the same way.”

A gasp escaped you and you opened your mouth to say something back, to tell him that whenever you looked at him, it felt like looking at a star, that as beautiful the stars were, they couldn't compare to the way his light and warmth made you feel. But he didn't let you speak, instead leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. Thoughts left your mind as you kissed back, reaching up with one hand to bury it in his hair, tugging slightly on it. Neither of you really took control, neither deepened the kiss, instead, it was filled with unspoken feelings.

“Jaem?” you asked quietly once he pulled away. You didn't dare voice out the hope that all of this had ignited in you, scared that you'd find out that you had imagined everything. 

“Tell me no, Y/N,” he responded, the corner of his mouth curving upside. “Please tell me no, tell me that I can’t have you right here and now, on your balcony. Because there's only this much I can handle.” 

You were trying to figure out what he meant. You had invited him over, you'd even hinted that you could “use some more practice”, you had technically left the decision to him. But then again, true to his word, never before had he been the first one to go for it, he had always waited for you to ask or make the first step. Until now. Now, he was already on top of you, and if you said yes, you knew it would not be because of the lessons. 

“What makes you think I don't want that? Sex with you under the stars sounds amazing honestly,” you said softly instead. His eyebrows shot up for a second, yet he didn't say anything. 

Instead, his lips crashed against yours once again, this time much more desperately, as if he was trying to take all of you at once. He pulled away again, only to drag his lips down your neck, biting down at the base of it. Your hand was still buried in his hair so you tugged on it harder, whimpering out and leaning your head to the side. 

“You can… leave hickeys if you want…” you mumbled, closing your eyes. “I’d like that.”

Jaemin started sucking on your skin harder, nibbling every now and then. You were lost in the feeling, his kisses felt like a blessing you had no idea whether you deserved. Your eyes opened up again only when you felt him pull away. You found him looking down at your neck as if contemplating his work. You didn't dare imagine what you looked like, because the idea of your neck covered in marks by him only fueled your arousal. 

“You are so beautiful, have I told you that before?” he asked and you chuckled, rolling your eyes a little. 

“Just now, I think,” you retorted. “And a few other times before that.” Yet you couldn’t deny the way your heart soared at his compliments. 

“I’m gonna keep saying it,” he smiled before lifting himself up and off of you. Before you could even question it, he pulled his shirt off and threw it to the side. “Help me out a little, there’s too many clothes on you at the moment.” 

Your top was the first one to go as soon as you sat up, Jaemin’s impatient fingers taking it off almost right away. Frantic hands traveling up and down his body, you were kissing him again, his hands around your waist and pressing you impossibly close to his body. 

You only pulled away to take a breath, meeting his eyes. There was a question in your eyes but he either didn’t see it or decided to ignore it. Instead, he pushed a strand of hair away from your face and pecked your lips.

“Are you sure that this is okay?” he asked reluctantly.

“Jaemin, I could not be more sure about it,” you replied, reaching up to cup his face in your hands. “It’s not just okay, you know? I want it. I want you.” 

His eyes widened a little at your words and he bit his lips. Did he understand what you meant? There was conflict on his face for a moment. Was he thinking about how to reject you? Or would he maybe, just maybe, reciprocate your feelings?

“If only you really did,” he muttered with a sigh, so quietly you barely heard it. 

But you did. And you froze. And what had been a tiny sense of hope before was now so clearly obvious you didn’t understand how you only realized it now. Your heart started thumping loudly in your chest. 

“No, I mean it,” you said quickly, but his eyes refused to meet yours. “Jaem, listen to me, I’m serious.” 

“I know, princess,” he finally looked at you again with a forced smile. “Ignore that, okay? Where were we?”

You tried to speak up again, but he didn’t give you a chance, kissing you again to stop you from speaking. Your resolve started to crumble. You could talk about it after, you told yourself. So you moved your hands down his body, reaching into his untied sweatpants to stroke him. You were not surprised to find him already hard, but it did make you smile in the kiss.

Jaemin groaned quietly at your touch and quickly helped you out of your shorts, then your underwear followed them. And suddenly you found yourself on Jaemin’s thigh, your bare pussy rubbing against the fabric of his sweatpants, and it made you let out a whimper. He chuckled quietly, leaning back on one of his arms, the other wrapping around your waist to support you.

“You said you want me, no?” he asked teasingly and you nodded quickly. “Come on then, show me how much.”

You didn’t need convincing, not with his commanding tone that sent shivers down your spine. You started rolling your hips, at first slowly, but the friction clouded your mind and holding back seemed impossible. Your head fell on his shoulder as moans escaped your mouth, and you were sure the way your nails were digging in his chest would leave marks. The fabric under you was sticky but you couldn’t bring yourself to care and he didn’t seem to mind either. 

“Such a good girl,” he hummed next to your ear and you shivered slightly. “Look at me, princess,” he asked and you forced yourself to lift your head. 

A finger tapped against your lips. It took you less than a moment of hesitation to open your mouth. Smirking a little to himself, Jaemin pushed two of his fingers in and you wrapped your lips around them, sucking gently and bringing your tongue around them. 

Maybe he didn’t expect you’d actually do it, or maybe he was surprised at how easily you obliged, but his jaw fell open with a soft smitten expression. 

“You never fail to amaze me,” he chuckled as he pulled his fingers out and you shrugged slightly with a small smile. 

“I do know a thing or two, y’know,” you said, yet as you’d stopped moving, the heat between your legs painfully reminded you of itself. “Jaem, please, can you fuck me already?” you pleased softly. 

“Your wish is my command,” he smiled, yet his smile dropped a little the next moment. “I don’t have lube in me though, it’s in my bag inside…” 

“It’s fine, I’ll be fine,” you reassured him. You could feel how wet you were already and you didn’t have the patience to wait. 

He hesitated for another long moment, before making you lift yourself so he could take off his sweatpants and underwear. He did pull a condom packet out of his pocket though before ditching the clothing items to the side. 

His fingers reached between your legs, two of his fingers teasing at your entrance for a second before he pushed them inside with ease. A hint of surprise passed on his face but he didn’t ponder on it, instead focused on spreading you out as much as he could before either of you lost your patience.

Then he put on the condom and flipped you two around so you could lay on your back as he finally pushed himself inside you carefully. You were genuinely amazed at his self-control to go slow on you. 

“You feel so good around me, princess,” he mumbled, pecking your lips. 

“And you feel good inside me,” you offered in return, smiling softly through tears pricking at your eyes. 

You could admit that it wasn’t as easy to get used to this time. He seemed to notice it too so he stroked your cheek gently, murmuring little praises to distract you as he waited for you to adjust.

When you finally felt comfortable enough, he started moving slowly. You expected him to speed up gradually like he did last time. But instead the rolls of his hips were slow and deep. His body was pressed flush against yours at almost all times and the heat was making your head spin in pleasure. 

You knew this wasn’t about physical pleasure only anymore. Not for you, and not for him either. It was so much more in many ways. 

You were close and he was too, you could feel it. So you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him down in a kiss, as sweet and intimate as the way your bodies were moving together. When you finally slipped over the edge, your moan was swallowed in the kiss. He thrust inside you a few more times, reaching his own high not long after. 

For a short moment, you were in a daze as Jaemin slipped out of you and discarded the condom, then helped you put on your underwear and his own, taking a spare blanket and wrapping it around both of you as he pulled you in his arms. 

The warmth of his body next to yours, his arms wrapped tightly around you as he held you close. It felt like home. How had you been so blind all this time… 

“You’re amazing, you know that, right?” he whispered and you looked up to his face. He had never seemed so open and genuine before. 

Or maybe he had always been and you’d just never noticed. Whichever it was, your heart skipped a beat. Your eyes returned to the sky above you as you smiled. 

“There’s something special about this,” you started gently, hoping he’d understand you this time, “about this moment, about the stars tonight. And that something is you, Jaem.” 

He didn’t reply. But his lips pressed against your forehead softly, almost the ghost of a kiss. You waited for a few loud heartbeats more for him to speak up. And then you reached the conclusion that he wouldn’t. 

Stealing a glance, you found him looking at the stars with sadness in his eyes. And you realized he didn’t understand. 

“Nana, I need to talk to you,” you sighed, lifting yourself on one arm to look at him better. “About the deal and-”

“Let’s talk about it tomorrow,” he looked at you, smiling. A pained smile. And you could guess what he was thinking. 

“No, please, I need you to listen to me,” you almost pleaded but he shook his head and pulled you gently back in his arms. 

“Tomorrow, I promise,” he mumbled and pecked your lips. “For now, let’s get some rest, okay?” 

And you had a bad feeling about it. You knew that you shouldn’t postpone the conversation anymore. But sleep was already catching up to you, and he was warm and comfortable, and you felt safe in his arms…

And you were drifting away before you even knew it.

~

You woke up in your bed the next morning. Jaemin’s hand was wrapped around your waist loosely, breathing light and you guessed he was still asleep. He must have brought you in after you’d fallen asleep. You smiled to yourself, stroking his hair softly and he hummed in his sleep, nuzzling into the pillow. You held back a chuckle so as to not wake him up and carefully slipped out of the bed. 

You were still only in your underwear so you looked around to find something to wear and your eyes fell on his tshirt. You considered it for a moment and then slipped it on, heading downstairs. 

Bare feet tapping on the floor, you made your way to the kitchen and turned on the coffee machine. A side effect of all the time spent with Jaemin was that you knew how to prepare coffee the way he liked it so you decided to prepare it before he woke up. And you also started working on one for yourself. 

Just as the coffee smell filled the air, another person walked into the kitchen and you looked up at Jaemin, smiling. He’d put on some clothes. He took a moment just looking at you, probably taking in the sight of you in his shirt. 

“Morning, sleepy head,” you greeted, nodding towards the coffee machine. “You’re right on time, it’s almost ready.” 

Chuckling, he made his way over to you. 

“This is literally the hottest thing you’ve ever done, I could literally kiss you right now,” he said and you grinned. 

“I don’t see anything stopping you.” 

He took the invitation, leaning closer, his arms holding onto the counter on both sides of your body, trapping you in as he leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. 

When he pulled away, his eyes were ever so soft and you reached up to ruffle his hair, before turning around to turn off the machine and pour the coffee into two cups, then turning back to him and handing him his. He took a sip and signed happily. 

“This is what heaven must be like and you’re a literal angel,” he joked, eyes twinkling with happiness.

“Well I’m amazing, you know, or so I was been told last night at least,” you teased. 

You regretted it the second that his smile fell and he pulled away from you. You opened your mouth to ask what was wrong, but words caught in your throat as he walked to the other side of the kitchen and leaned back on the opposite counter, focusing on the cup in his hand with a guarded expression on his face.

“Nana, what’s wrong?” you finally voiced out. He didn’t reply, taking slow sips of his coffee. “Come on, tell me,” you pushed, “did I do something wrong or-”

“I think it’s time we drop the deal,” he said suddenly. You flinched. “You wanted to talk so let’s talk. There’s nothing else that you need to learn from me and I can’t keep doing this anymore.”

“Why?” you asked quietly. But you knew why - it was the same reason why you had considered calling it off yourself. 

“What do you mean why?” he scoffed, forcing himself to laugh. “We’re done with the course, it’s time that we stop… it’s time that you stop doing with me things you should be doing with the person you’re in love with.” 

You swallowed heavily and put your cup down on the counter walking over to him. Was it not obvious already? It had been obvious about Renjun, so why wasn’t he seeing it now? 

“But why should I stop, Jaem?” you asked and reached over to take his hand but he pulled it away. A sting of pain flashed through you. “You promised that you’d listen, you haven’t even heard yet what I want to say.”

“I don’t think I need to hear it,” he chuckled and you flinched. “I’ve made up my mind. It was fun while it lasted but it’s time it ends.” 

And to emphasize his words, he downed his coffee and walked over to the other room. His bag was already ready and you realized he had already decided to leave even before this conversation. You rushed after him but he was already at the door, putting on his shoes. 

“Will you just let me speak?” you asked, frustration evident in your voice. “Jaemin, I’m not gonna force you to keep giving me sex lessons, this is something completely different!” 

“It is,” he agreed as if you were on the same page. “The lessons have gone too far. Everything that happened last night proved it.” 

“So what, you’re afraid I’ll find out that you’re in love with me so you’ll run away before I can tell you my side?” Your frustration took the best of you. You hadn’t intended to say that. You should have just told him you loved him instead. But th words had already left your mouth and you couldn’t take them back now. 

His eyes widened in surprise for a second, then a sad smile curved his lips again. 

“Smart girl,” he praised, but it felt like a slap instead. “Give me some time, okay? A day or something, I can’t do this right now.” 

He hesitated for a second, then leaned down to peck your lips. And then he was out the door. 

You wanted to go after him, but you were stuck. He hadn’t even let you confess but you felt like he’d already rejected you. Tears pricked at your eyes and by the time you managed to make yourself open the door, he was gone. 

~ 

You’d texted him over 50 times already. You’d called almost as much. He was not responding in any way. 

You went to his house but his mother told you he hadn’t come back - she thought he was still with you. You dismissed her concern when she asked about your puffy eyes. 

You went to his favorite coffee shop but he wasn’t there. You went to the school campus even though it was Saturday and you knew he wouldn’t be there. You went to every other place you could think of. 

If he was avoiding you, you decided that you needed help finding him. You pulled out your phone, vaguely hopeful that he might have replied to your texts. He hadn’t. So you called Hyuck. Frustratingly enough, he also didn’t pick up. But you were desperate so you kept trying.

“For Christ’s sake, this better be an emergency,” he picked up finally, annoyance clear as day in his tone. In the background, you heard Karina’s concerned voice ask what was going on.

“Donghyuck, I’m sorry, it’s important,” you started, almost tripping over your words at the speed they were coming out of your mouth. “Jaemin has not been answering my texts, he’s not picking up my calls and I looked everywhere I could think of but I have no idea where he is and I need to talk to him.” 

There was a short silence. 

“The dumbass outed himself and he’s now scared of your reaction, isn’t he?” It could have been a lucky guess. But you knew better. 

“You knew about it?” you asked, a hint of betrayal in your voice. 

“Of course I did,” Hyuck sighed. “He’s been in love with you for a year and he’s almost as obvious about it as you.” You froze. 

“And you didn’t think to tell me about it from the beginning?” you nearly shouted at him. 

“Because it was not my business to meddle in his love life if he had decided to go through with this!” the boy defended himself. In the background, Karina seemed to have more questions now. He shushed her softly, before speaking up again. “Plus, first of all, I knew you’d come around and fall in love with him too, sooner or later! And I did warn you and try to hint it to you, okay? Do you think I did it because I enjoy watching one of my best friends suffer because of this dumb deal of yours? Just because he didn’t show it in front of you, doesn’t mean it was ever really okay. And I love you both, but I am tired of being your relationship therapist, okay? I don’t know where he is, but you’ll have to figure this out yourself.” 

The line was silent for a while.  A sense of guilt was choking you up. You’d barely gasped out an apology when the line went dead. You looked at the phone screen and Jaemin’s smile on the wallpaper made tears well in your eyes again. There had been a part of you in denial about the way you’d been hurting him but Hyuck’s words had forced you to realize it. For a year. You’d assumed he had fallen for you the same way you had. But you had been so wrong. 

As you scrolled through your contacts, you couldn’t help but laugh at the irony of what you were about to do. 

“Y/N?” Renjun asked with a hint of confusion. You’d always called him so rarely. “What’s up?” 

“Hey, uh…” you hesitated. “Do you happen to know where Jaemin is?” 

“Jaemin? No, I haven’t spoken to him today,” he replied, but his tone shifted to concern immediately. “Is everything alright? You don’t sound too good.” 

“Yeah, I’m…” you started, but what was the use in lying? “I did something really dumb and I need to talk to him but he’s avoiding me and I don’t know where to find him but I need to tell him that…” you took a short breath. You were still scared of the words. But if you could say it in front of Renjun, you could say it to Jaemin too. “That I love him.” 

“You need to tell him that?” Renjun asked, confused. “Doesn’t he know it already? I thought you two were dating and just didn’t want to tell us yet.” 

You couldn’t help but laugh. The whole situation was ridiculous. Of course, Jaemin wouldn’t tell him what was going on, not when he knew how important it was to you. But Renjun wasn’t dumb, of course he would see through the two of you. And from the pieces he had, of course he’d reach the most reasonable conclusion. 

“It’s… a bit more complicated than that,” you said. “And that’s exactly why I need to clear things with him. Please, I just need to find out where he is, can you help me?” 

“I’ll do my best,” he replied. You thanked him about four times before he finally convinced you that he’d need to hang up so he can call Jaemin. 

You waited anxiously to hear back from him. When you finally did, it was in the form of a text. ‘He’s at the city park near your place, but he might be heading home soon’.

The park. You hadn’t thought of the park. How could you not have thought of the park? 

Typing back a quick ‘thank you’, you immediately rushed out of your house. The walk was a daze, your mind only cleared once you saw a familiar cotton candy stall. And on a bench next to it was Jaemin. Taking a deep breath, you almost ran over. 

He looked up and flinched back in surprise as soon as he realized it was you in front of him. His lips formed a small o as he glanced down at his phone and realization hit him. He scoffed quietly and then looked up at you again.

“You look like a mess,” were his first words to you.

“Why would you agree to the stupid deal if you already had feelings for me, you idiot?” was your reply, equal parts desperation and relief washing over you. 

He sighed and nodded to the free spot next to him. You sat down, relieved that at least he didn’t try to run away again. 

“Donghyuck can’t keep his mouth shut, can he?” he chuckled, turning to look at you.

“No, Donghyuck kept it shut for too long,” you scowled. “But that doesn’t answer my question.”

“I did it because I was in love with you,” came his response. “I’d been in love with you for so long and you never even noticed. And you liked Renjun, so I didn’t say anything. But then you came to me, you wanted me. I knew it wasn’t the same, I knew your end goal was Renjun. But you were asking me for help, how can I say no when you need my help? So I said yes because I thought it would be fine. Because I was selfish and happy that I’d get a chance to be with you even if it had to be like this. And because I hoped that you might change your mind. But it became so hard to hold back, you know? To tell what was real and what I wanted to be real.” 

You fought back your tears. This wasn’t your place to cry. You had been the one to hurt him. 

“Jaem, I am so sorry that I made you go through that,” you said softly. “If I had known, I would have asked. I never meant to…”

“I know,” he shrugged. “You don’t need to apologize. I knew what I was agreeing to, I just thought I’d handle it better.” 

“No, listen,” you started again. “And I need you to actually listen this time. I never meant to hurt you, but I know that I did. So I do owe you an apology. But that’s not everything that I have to say. Yes, when we agreed on the lessons, I thought I wanted to be with Renjun. But the truth is that I really don’t. You say you hoped I’d change my mind, yet you are so oblivious to the fact that I actually did. The past months have been some of the happiest in my life, you know? I spent them with someone who laughed with me when I was happy, who held me tight when I was lonely. I spent them with a person who would always make me feel safe. A person that would smile at me bright enough to lighten up the worst of days, and look at me as if I am the most precious thing in his world. A person that would stick up little stars on my wall for hours even though nothing of it makes sense to him. Someone who sat through my favorite movie and loved it because it was my favorite movie. Someone that didn’t care about the stars but let me talk about them for an hour just because they made me happy. Someone that apparently cared more about me than about his own happiness.” 

You made a pause to recollect your spiraling thoughts. Jaemin was looking at you, wide eyes and mouth half open in surprise. And you knew the hope in his eyes and the way the corner of his lips was shyly trying to curve into a smile. 

“And yet when I told that someone that it’s him that I want, he thought I was lying. When I told him that he’s special, he refused to listen. And when I tried to tell him that I’m in love with him, he ran away. What I was trying to tell you since yesterday, Jaemin, is that I am in love with you. Have been for a while. It took me too long to realize but I mean it. You were jealous of the stars when there’s no need for you to be. I loved them because they made me feel at home. But you make me feel at home too. Na Jaemin, you make me feel like the stars do.” 

At first, he didn’t say anything. He was still staring at you with a smitten expression, yet the smile was back on his face. That beautiful smile that you loved more than anything else. Carefully, as if still in disbelief, he reached over to take your hand and you didn’t hesitate for a second to intertwine your fingers with his. 

“Like the stars?” He repeated. “Really?” 

“Yes,” you giggled, “like the stars. Like those big balls of hot gas billions of kilometers away.” 

“Oh, that makes it sound awful,” he cringed and you couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m sorry I ever called them that way. Let’s stick with stars”. 

“Okay, we’ll stick with stars,” you agreed. Your body was still buzzing from the emotional chaos it had been through, yet maybe it would all be okay in the end. “As long as you agree to stick with me. And I mean that as in, I want you to be my boyfriend, Nana.” 

He looked down at your intertwined fingers instead of replying. His eyes lit up when he noticed something. 

“You’re wearing the ring?” he asked, thumb rubbing over the piece of metal. 

“Haven’t taken it off since we got them,” you nodded. “It was that date that made me realize that I love you so I didn’t wanna risk losing it. Back then I didn’t know you liked me too so I had to cling onto the memory.” 

“How fitting that I chose to come here then,” he smiled as he lifted your hand to press a kiss on the back of your palm. “I didn’t think you’d agree to the date. I almost wanted to tell you back then, but you didn’t see it as a real date and I figured it wasn’t a good time.” 

“I did see it as a real date,” you admitted. “But you would have saved us all this trouble if you’d told me back then.” 

“And miss that pretty speech of yours?” he raised his eyebrows. “No way, I’d rather run away again so you’d have to come up with an even better one.” 

“Don’t you dare,” you rolled your eyes, yet a grin spread your lips as you squeezed his hand.

“Fine, fine,” he chuckled.

“You still haven’t answered my question,” you pointed out, nibbling your lip a little anxiously.

“What question?” he looked at you and he was either generally confused or pretending really well. You sighed and shook your head. 

“I literally asked if you’d be my boyfriend and you said nothing,” you pouted, reaching down with your free hand to play with his fingers. 

“Oh, that,” he laughed and you glared at him. “I didn’t realize it was a question. I thought it’s pretty clear that I want that.” 

You shook your head and sighed in disappointment - not in his answer, just his approach to the topic. Yet you couldn’t fight the smile spreading your lips once again. You’d made some dumb decisions along the way, yes, and you’d been too oblivious to see. But Jaemin loved you and wanted to be with you. And you loved him. And the sun was shining softly, and Jaemin’s smile was shining too and he was next to you, holding your hand. 

“Like the stars, right?” he asked suddenly and you looked at him confused. He chuckled and leaned down to peck your nose before repeating his words. “Like the stars, you said.” 

“Why are you so stuck on that?” you giggled. 

“Because I saw the way you look at the stars, you know? You say they make you feel at home, but you look like they make you feel so much more than that. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you look as happy as you were when talking about them. And you kinda look the same way right now, so if I am the reason…” 

“You really didn’t see it before?” you tilted your head in amusement. “That I am the happiest when I’m with you?” 

“So… like the stars?” 

“Yes, Jaemin. Like the stars.” 

~

Epilogue

~

You were sitting with your friends in the school cafeteria during lunch break as usual. Taking a sip of your drink, you only now realized that by mistake you had taken a strawberry milk bottle instead of orange juice like you had intended to. A small pout curved your lips as you set the small bottle on the table.

“What's wrong, princess?” Jaemin asked, concerned as he noticed your displeasure. You shook your head slightly. 

“Nothing, I just picked up the wrong drink by mistake, I wanted orange juice,” you answered, sad eyes fixed on the now very obvious mistake. Really, how had you even managed to mix the two up? 

“Oh,” was his reaction at first. Then after a moment, he smiled and swapped your drink with his own - a bottle of orange juice. “Here, have mine.”

“Jaem- you hate strawberry milk,” you argued, trying to switch them back but he stopped you, grabbing your wrist with one hand as his other one pushed a strand of hair behind your ear. 

“It's okay, as long as you’re happy I will be fine,” he smiled, loving eyes looking at you. You pouted even more now, torn between not wanting to let him ‘sacrifice’ himself for you and the warmth in your chest. 

“You guys are disgusting,” Donghyuck crashed the moment with a roll of his eyes. “I swear, ever since you got together, it's like I'm a side character in a cringy rom-com.”

“I think they're cute,” Renjun joined in, hitting Hyuck's arm. “Let them have their honeymoon phase, no one questioned you when you made, like, three different playlists just about how whipped you are for Karina.”

“You did what?” your best friend asked, scoffing. She burst out laughing at the way Hyuck's ears turned red as he tried to deny everything. “Loser,” she rolled her eyes, yet none of you were fooled to miss the loving tone in her voice. “Anyways, speaking of, you two never really told us how you got together. I didn’t even know something was going on between you until I overheard a very strange half of a phone call. Obviously, I want the details,” she said, now turning to you and Jaemin with raised eyebrows. 

“Oh, yes please, give us the details, we’re burning to know,” Hyuck grinned menacingly, clearly glad to not be the topic anymore. 

“Uh…” You looked at Jaemin and found him already looking at you as if letting you tell the story however you want to. You could lie, of course. But you didn't really want to. “It was kind of dumb, like… remember those English lessons? Well, they never happened… actually, I… asked him to teach me how to have, uh, sex…”

“May I, perchance, ask why the hell you would do that?” Karina asked, apparently Donghyuck had really not been whipped enough to break his promise to you. Then realization lit up her eyes and she shook her head slightly. “That’s why you were asking about…”

You were burning with embarrassment just thinking about the whole thing now, but you figured if not the people on this table, who would you even share this with.

“Well, I was scared because I had no experience with boys before this, and I had this crush on, well,” you looked at Renjun awkwardly, realizing he was the only one you hadn’t mentioned your crush to before, “you, and I was just afraid that I'd disappoint you. So I asked him to teach me so that I could feel more confident to confess. But, uh, yeah, things didn’t go according to that plan.” 

“Touching story for the grandkids,” Hyuck said sarcastically, while Karina tried to holding back from laughing, not very successfully whatsoever.

Renjun had not said anything yet and you looked at him, kind of scared of how he'd react. But whatever you had imagined, you hadn't expected his answer. 

“Oh, darling, I do appreciate the effort and I’m glad I could help you two, but,” he started, chuckling a little. “Did the guys not tell you that I'm gay?” 

(Turns out that Jaemin didn't have the heart to tell you, plus he hoped to really win you over, not just have you because your other option was gay. Hyuck simply found it hilarious. You proceed to murder Donghyuck for his crimes against humanity (you). You end up drawing a lot of attention but the immediate death of Lee Donghyuk is more important.) 

~

taglist: @jaeymark @okokoksblog @multihoe-net @jaemboi64 @bythe8 @sweetjaemss @magnificentjudgemoneyhands @jsjcue @sunshinedhyuck @luvdroids @wanlore @marklexleaf @back2jisung @taehyungmami @the-midnight-arthouse @multifandombtvh @chichhihaa @nctevia @thiccfullsun @hwanunjin @dinochocochip @keemburley @paintandwine @fairypothos @jaemints @dreams-in-different-colours @faesficfix @pradagukkie @leaz-kpop-life

[jaemanon]

Like The Stars Pt. 3

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4

Pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, sex lessons au, friends to lovers

Word Count: ~8,2k

Includes: high school seniors (everyone is legal of age); canon bisexual mc; side characters donghyuck, renjun, and karina; profanities; obviously, sex lessons; kind of a slow burn; mc is not as oblivious and innocent anymore?; does mc unconsciously have praise kink? she might; protected sex!!

Summary: you'd had a crush on renjun for as long as you could remember, but your lack of experience always stopped you from taking the first step; it's a good thing you have your trusted friend jaemin to help you out

Author's note: i’d like to use the moment to say that pt.1 is already at 1000+ and pt.2 is at 500+ and i really wanna thank all of you for reading so far! it means so much that so many people like it and that there are so many of you that keep up with the story, i hope that you will enjoy this one too !! <33 on a lighter note tho, time is relative so once again, pretend you understand the time skips plz

“Princess, let’s go on a date.”

You’d been on the phone with Jaemin for the past half an hour, discussing an imaginary future where the world was ruled by dogs and arguing which breeds would hold the highest positions. The sudden drop of such a question was enough to have your brain short-circuiting for a second until you realized the meaning of the words.

“A date?” you asked, still too dumbfounded to respond. 

“Yeah, a date,” he repeated with a soft chuckle but you could hear a slight awkwardness in the sound. Something in your chest fluttered. “We’ve literally been having sex for like three months now, might as well go on an official date or something.”

It sounded like it made sense. And at the same time, it absolutely didn’t. Your sex lessons with Jaemin had nothing to do with romance and feelings, and while you did start hanging out a lot because of them, an actual date really sounded way too distant from the nature of your relationship. 

But then your mind took a turn towards the warmth that spread in your chest every time he complimented you, the way you looked forward to any and every moment you could spend with him alone, the way you’d started seeing him differently - he was not just one of your best friends anymore, in the sense that he meant more. Suddenly, a suspicion started growing in you at that realization.

“Y/N? You still there? You can just say no, y’know…” Jaemin coughed awkwardly on the other side of the line. 

“Okay, let’s do it,” you said instead. 

“Wait-” Jaemin sounded genuinely surprised, and honestly you were too. “Are you for real?” he asked and you couldn’t help but think that his voice sounded hopeful. 

“Yeah, sure, I’m up for that,” you confirmed, nibbling on your lower lip. “Where do you wanna go?”

“Just stay where you are,” he said, a bit too obviously excited. The thought made the unfamiliar fluttering in your chest appear again. “I’ll come get you in, like, an hour.”

Next thing you knew, the call had dropped. You stared at the screen of your phone for a moment as the call screen disappeared and made way to your home screen. A photo of you and Jaemin. He’d been the one to take it, in celebration of putting up all the stars on your wall and he’d also been the one to set it as your wallpaper but you never thought of changing it. Looking at his smile made you happy every time you unlocked your phone. 

Maybe that’s something you should have realized sooner.

Your mind was buzzing as you got ready for your date with Jaemin. You were supposed to be in love with Renjun, so why was this date with Jaemin making you so nervously excited? You tried to imagine what it would be like if you were going out with Renjun instead but for some reason that didn’t feel right.

Deciding you should owe it to the fact that they are two different people and it felt unfair to spend a whole day with someone while imagining what it would be like to be with another person, you finished up picking your outfit and waited for Jaemin to arrive. 

“Pretty flowers for a pretty girl?” Jaemin grinned as you opened the door. Your gaze shifted down to a bouquet in his outstretched arm. 

“Daisies?” you raised your eyebrows, chucking. “I do appreciate the uniqueness but that’s kind of an odd choice, no?”

“Yeah, uh,” he scratched the back of his head awkwardly and chuckled, “a granny on the street gave them to me and she was so sweet I just couldn’t say no.” 

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes and laugh softly as you took the small bouquet from him and brought it inside to put in a vase. You could easily believe the grandma story, but a little part of you melted at the idea that maybe he could have actually gotten out of his way to get you flowers. You did your best to disregard the thought for the time being and walked out again.

“So where are we going exactly, Romeo?” you asked, hooking your arm around his with a smile. 

“Does it have to be Romeo exactly?” he asked, sounding a little concerned. “I don’t really feel like dying yet.”

“Sure, sure, be whoever you want,” you shook your head dismissively, in a quite childish manner honestly. “I just wanna know what we’re doing today.”

“You’ll see soon enough,” he smiled and you whined in response. “Come on, it’s not like I could come up with anything that spectacular on the spot, at least let me have the element of surprise with it.” 

“First of all, don’t act like I’ve not been a witness to the extent to which you’re willing to go to impress a girl you like,” you huffed, trying to cross your arms despite the fact that they were still wrapped around one of his. “And sure, this may be a kinda-not-really-a-date date but I will be genuinely offended if you just took me to the convenience store and got me a lollipop or something.”

“Well shit, can we go sit on that bench over there, I need to come up with a new date idea real quick,” he grinned and you hated the fact that you almost believed he could have been planning to do just that. “Relax, it’s at least a little bit better than that.”

You couldn’t make up your mind on whether that sounded reassuring or not. You decided to just trust him for now. With a quiet huff, you unwrapped your arms from his and instead decided on intertwining your fingers with his, which earned you a surprised glance and a sweet smile as his hold on your hand tightened. Some goddamn butterflies in your stomach seemed to come alive at that. 

~

The walk seemed both too long for your curiosity, and yet quite short once you reached your supposed destination - one of the city parks. 

“I didn’t know there’s a fair going on here,” you said as you took in the stalls offering anything from sweet corn to trinkets and games like duck fishing and shooting. There was even a carousel and a small Ferris wheel. 

“Yeah, I found out randomly and I thought you might like it so I really wanted to bring you here,” Jaemin smiled. Then his smile seemed to waver a little as he added: “Of course, if you completely hate it and that was a dumb idea, we can do something else instead…”

You quickly shook your head and looked at him, eyes shining as you smiled. 

“No, it’s perfect,” you reassured him. “I haven’t been to one of these in a while, let’s go look around!” 

The first stop you dragged Jaemin to was a cotton candy stall. You watched with almost child-like fascination as the owner rolled the cotton into a blue flower for the kid in line before you, bouncing a little on your heels excitedly. 

“Which color do you want, princess?” Jaemin asked as your turn came and he pulled out his wallet. You would have argued but you knew there wasn’t much of a point with him. 

“Pink,” you said instead, a smile curving your lips when the stall owner started working on your cotton candy. 

Soon enough you were holding a pink flower in your hand, munching cheerfully on the sugary treat. Jaemin led you as you walked around and looked at what every stand had to offer. You did end up buying a cute bracelet from a really kind lady and matching rings for you and Jaemin because you wanted to “have a memory of your kinda-not-really-a-date date”. It’s not like he tried to argue anyway. 

Instead, once you two had walked away from the stall, he dragged you to the side of the alley and stopped you there. 

“Remember that Polaroid camera you guys got me two years ago?” he asked and you nodded. “Since I rarely have the chance to use it, I actually brought it today. So let’s make some memories, hm?”

“Yes, yes!” you beamed and he took the small device out of his backpack, snapping a quick picture of your intertwined fingers and the rings on them. “Take one of the cotton candy too while it still looks pretty!” you prompted excitedly and he obliged with a soft chuckle. 

With the camera in his hand, he started pulling you around to take more and more photos of you and you had to literally steal it from him so that you could take a few of him as well. You did also take a couple of photos together: one taken by a lady passing by and one he took of the two of you. 

Somehow, you ended up in front of a shooting game stall. Your eyes glided over the prizes offered and stopped on a big stuffed bunny. 

“Look, it looks just like you,” you giggled, pointing at the toy. Jaemin followed your finger and smiled.

“How about I win it for you?” he raised his eyebrows. 

“Can you?” you laughed. “You’ve never even been in the same room as a gun before.” 

“So? You doubt my abilities to win a toy for you?” he asked, sounding almost offended if it wasn’t for the smile still curving his lips prettily. 

“I know better than to underestimate Na Jaemin,” you rolled your eyes. “But you can’t just be good at everything from the first try, you know.” 

Jaemin scoffed at your words. With a determination you rarely saw in him, he placed his things on the counter and paid the man behind the counter for one game. 

“How many points do I need for the bunny?” he asked seriously. 

“120 in total or three of those rabbit targets,” the man chuckled. He’d witnessed your conversation and he seemed entertained by it. 

Briefly, he explained how many points each target brought and Jaemin took upon his task. Surprisingly enough, he was doing quite well. He didn’t go for the rabbits, but five shots later, he hadn’t missed a single one. Setting the gun down, he looked at the man expectantly. 

“110, my boy,” he shook his head. 

“What do you mean 110?!” Jaemin widened his eyes in surprise. “I shot them all!” 

“Yeah, you got three times thirty and two tens,” the man explained patiently. 

“No, no, you said that those were 15 points each!” the boy argued and you could see him getting frustrated. You glanced at the man again. 

“He said that the ones above them are 15 points, Nana, you must have misunderstood,” you said. Bringing a smile on your face, you added: “It’s okay, I told you you can’t make it, let me be right this once, okay?” 

“But…” You could see the pout forming on his face and you couldn’t help but chuckle, reaching over to ruffle his hair. “I wanted to get it for you…” 

“Tell you what, son,” the man spoke up again. “Since no one else is in line right now, I’ll give you one extra shot. If you can get one of the rabbits, I’ll give you the bunny.” 

Jaemin’s face lit up at that as he nodded quickly and picked up the gun again. You couldn’t miss the tension in his body as he aimed for what seemed like ages. When he finally took the shot, you were almost anxious to check the result.

He’d shot the rabbit in the center. The victorious shout from his side told you as much about the achievement. He turned to you, a radiant smile on his lips which you couldn’t help but return. The stall owner went to get the stuffed bunny. 

“You should keep him, kid,” he said as he handed you the toy, winking conspiratorially to you. “He looks like he might be for real.” 

You felt heat rush to your face as you took the plushie and hugged it tightly to your chest. You glanced at Jaemin at found him holding the polaroid towards you. A photo rolled out of the device a moment later. 

“Sorry, you just looked adorable,” he grinned at your accusing glare. “Told you I can win.”

“Only because you got a bonus shot,” you rolled your eyes, yet your eyes drifted down to the toy and a smile grew on your lips. “Thank you.” 

Jaemin returned your smile and reached over to take your hand again as the two of you waved goodbye to the stall owner and walked away. A soft silence fell between you. Your thoughts drifted away to the thumping of your heart as you thought about the way he was squeezing your hand gently and the soft toy in your other hand. How different from before it felt and how similar it was to the way you felt about Renjun. Which was really weird to think about, because you could almost swear that thinking of Renjun at the moment did not make you feel the same way.

“Is there anything else you’d wanna do, princess?” he spoke up suddenly, startling you out of your thoughts. You looked at him again, and it felt like you looked for the first time. The realization almost startled the air out of your lungs.

“We’ve been here for quite a while,” you said, nibbling on your lower lip. It was true, not that you minded. “How about we go get a drink from over there and head home?” you offered and he nodded, leading you to the nearby coffee booth. 

The walk to your house felt much shorter than the one from it, perhaps because you didn't really wanna go home so it could only come too quickly. And indeed too soon you found yourself at the front door of your house. You turned to look at Jaemin. 

“Thank you for today,” he said, surprising you. He smiled at your expression and reached up to ruffle your hair. “I had fun so thanks for actually taking me up on the idea.”

“Oh, no, yeah,” you chuckled. “I had fun too, and I got a new plushie. His name is Nana by the way.”

“Oh what, really?” he gasped in fake surprise, bringing a hand to his chest for a bigger effect. “I can’t imagine how you thought of that!”

You giggled, hitting his arm lightly and he laughed in response. Then you bit your lip for a second, before taking an impulsive decision to lean up and press your lips against his. That seemed to startle him as he gaped as you pulled away. You could see red covering his ears. 

“What, we just went on a date, can I not do that?” you teased, giggling again at his flustered expression. “Come on, it’s not even our first kiss.”

“You…” He stared at you for a moment, maybe fighting his embarrassment or whatever else he was feeling, before finally smiling calmly again. “Thank you for the great date, Y/N. I’ll see you at school tomorrow.” 

With those words, he leaned over to peck your lips softly and then walked away.

~

That Saturday you found yourself reminiscing about the carnival visit, curled up in your bed, and looking through the numerous Polaroid photos you two had taken. Jaemin had given you half of them, ‘as is only fair’ and you were trying to pick which ones to put up on your memory board and which ones to keep somewhere safe. 

There were multiple photos where it was just you. Happily smiling, laughing, sometimes in the middle of saying something or eating cotton candy. It was all due to the fact that he never warned you that he was taking a photo, of course, but there was the undeniable fact that you couldn’t remember the last time you had so much fun without another care in the world. 

Then there were the photos you’d taken of him. He’d said he was giving all of them to you. They weren’t as natural as yours were - mainly because you had to specifically take the camera from him every time you wanted to take one - but despite that his smile was bright and genuine. And there was an… unusual glow in his eyes. It felt like he hadn’t been looking at the camera but at you. And like he was still looking through the photo at you. The clenching in your stomach came back so you quickly put the photo you were looking at away. 

He’d also given you the photo of your hands with the rings and one of the two of you that the random lady had taken. On it, you were clinging onto his side, while his arm wrapped around your waist and held you close. You were leaning onto him and his smile was halfway buried in your hair as if he was a second away from pressing a kiss to the top of your head. 

The two photos right next to each other left a sweet taste in your mouth. It felt like they were real. It felt like your kinda-not-really-a-date date had been… well, really a date. You couldn’t help but think back to the afternoon you’d spent together, the bubbling excitement in your chest when you were with him and the warmth you felt whenever he smiled at you. 

Your eyes traveled over to your bed where Bunny Nana was comfortably nestled between your pillows. You’d hardly let go of it for the first couple of days since the date. And it’d been your faithful companion for a good night’s sleep throughout the whole week. A small smile curved your lips. 

Turning your gaze back onto the photos, you reached out and picked up one of the photos with only Jaemin on it. Your favorite one. As your fingers traced his face on it, you reached a painful conclusion - your feelings had irreversibly changed. 

You couldn’t tell when. You pushed your brain and you couldn’t come up with any recollection of it happening. And you could swear you hadn’t meant for it to happen.

But you were in love with Jaemin. 

In all honesty, the realization scared you. It scared you when you compared it to what you felt towards Renjun - it had the same bittersweet taste, yet this time felt like so much more. It scared you as you realized that what you’d felt towards Renjun was not there anymore - he was one of your best friends and you didn’t wish him to be anything else anymore. But mostly, it scared you as you realized what you’d brought upon yourself. 

Perhaps this was what Hyuck had tried to warn you about. But you hadn’t fallen for Jaemin because of the sex lessons. You’d fallen for him because he was sweet and caring to you, because he always made sure you were okay, because of the way he always knew how to brighten your day. Because you’d allowed yourself to see him, instead of focusing only on Renjun. As you remembered all the times you’d been together, the little jokes, the shared comforting cuddles as you watched a dumb movie or talked about just anything, the stolen pecks whenever you could excuse them, you couldn’t help but realize how oblivious you’d been to your own heart. 

And that same heart was now thumping in your chest, both exhilarated by the freedom that awareness brought, and terrified of the mess lying ahead of you. 

Because you were closer to Jaemin than you’d ever been to Renjun, and because your feelings were apparently stronger this time, and because you weren’t sure whether you’d manage acting oblivious about them when you were not anymore. 

Because you were terrified of ruining what you had with Jaemin, but it was all your fault for starting the whole thing to begin with. 

~

“Have you and Hyuck had sex already?” you asked, eyes fixed on the ceiling in Karina’s bedroom. The girl looked up from her eyeshadow palette and raised a questioning eyebrow at you. 

“Yeah, we have,”  she answered directly. “Why?” 

“How long did it take you? Like, after you got together, I know that it took you ages to get to that point,” you chuckled. 

“Well, that depends,” your best friend laughed, setting down her makeup brush as she walked over to sit down next to you on the bed. “If you count just messing around a little, we’d been doing that since a long time back.” You couldn’t help the surprised gasp that escaped your lips to which Karina just rolled her eyes jokingly. “But if you mean, like, going all the way or whatever, it didn’t happen right away.” 

You hummed, nibbling on your lower lip. You were overthinking the amount of time you’d been stalling with Jaemin. Especially after your recent revelation. 

“Is this about Renjun again?” Karina asked, taking your hand with a concerned look in her eyes. “Still worried about your lack of experience?”

“Yeah,” you lied almost too easily. You trusted your best friend with your whole heart, but you did not feel ready to open up about everything that had been going on. You hoped she’d forgive you for hiding it from her. 

“Babe, he’s known you for years,” she said gently, squeezing your hand. “If your lack of experience can be a breaking point for him, then he’s not the right one for you. Plus, corruption kink is a thing, you know.”

You scoffed and rolled your eyes. 

“It’s not only that, Rina,” you muttered, hugging one of her fluffy pillows. “I’m still scared of what it’s gonna be like. What if the moment comes but I’m too scared to do it? Or what if I keep waiting for ‘the right time’ but it never comes? What if he’s okay with waiting for me but I ruin everything because I’m too self-conscious?” 

“Y/N,” she chuckled softly. “All those ‘what if’s are in your head. What if he’s happy to just have you by his side? What if he wants you to feel comfortable with him rather than just get it over with?” 

You bit your lips, thinking over her words. Of course, she was thinking about you in a potential relationship with Renjun, but you were thinking about how many different ways there were for you to ruin things with Jaemin. Yeah, to him it was just about helping you learn. But you guessed he was expecting that at some point he’d fuck you, and that was something he had made clear he’d like to do, even that he’d thought about it. And, well, he probably wouldn’t have agreed if that weren’t the case. What if he was disappointed that you kept stalling? Yeah, he’d never even hinted at that, but… 

You’d also thought about telling off the deal. Not because you didn’t want to go through with it, you actually wanted to do it more than when you had initially. And that was dangerous. What if it became impossible to hold back once you’d slept with him? But then again, how do you explain why you wanna give up the lessons halfway without lying but also without telling the truth? 

“You’re overthinking again, aren’t you?” Karina pulled you out of your thoughts and you looked at her, pouting at being caught. “Listen, do you remember how it was the first time you were with a girl?” 

“Yeah,” you nodded, smiling a bit at the memory. “We were both so lost and I was terrified of doing something wrong.” 

“And did you do something wrong?” she prompted.

“Probably,” you laughed a little. “But it got easier after that. I felt comfortable with her.”

“Exactly,” Karina winked at you and grinned. “Whether it’s Renjun that you get to be with or not, this is something that you’ll be able to talk about, and you’ll know how far you wanna go and when. Just go with what feels right to you. If it makes you feel better, I was anxious too the first time Donghyuck and I had sex. And for all his big talk, he was just as anxious.” 

“Thanks,” you smiled at her gratefully. You did feel a bit better. There was still a lot you couldn’t talk to her about, but even so, she’d managed to reassure you. 

“Of course,” she waved her hand in an ‘it’s nothing’ gesture. “Now, you can repay me by helping me with my eyeliner.”

~

You’d made up your mind. Your talk with Karina had made you reach a conclusion and you were going to stick with it before you ended up overthinking again and convincing yourself against it. 

“Nana, you’re home, right?” you asked over the phone, a little breathless from the fast walking.

“Yeah, why?” the boy on the other side asked, confused by your sudden call. 

“Can you come down and open the door please?” 

“I’ll come in a second,” he said quickly, and indeed a moment later, he was opening the door for you, a worried look in his eyes. “Is everything okay? Are you alright?” 

You couldn’t stop a chuckle from escaping you as you nodded in confirmation and walked inside. 

“Yes, everything’s fine, I just…” you started, then bit your lips as you searched for the right words. When you didn’t find them, you reached into your handbag and pulled out your most recent purchase, handing it to him. 

He stared at your outstretched hand for a long moment, before looking up at your face again, eyebrows raised in question. You weren’t sure what to say so you just stood there for a while, hoping he’d speak up sooner or later. His eyes fell again to the condom in your hand and he laughed voicelessly. 

“And here I thought something bad had happened to you,” he said finally, crossing his arms and leaning on the wall behind him. 

“Sorry,” you chuckled a little awkwardly. “I just wanted to get here before I change my mind.” 

Your eyes drifted away from him, heart beating loudly in your ears and you briefly wondered if the tension in your body was concealed or if he could see the shaking of your hands. 

“Of course, if it’s a bad time, I can go…” you said quickly, realizing that you’d just appeared out of nowhere without a warning. 

“No, no, it’s as good a time as any,” he said in what you supposed was meant to be a reassuring tone. Yet you either imagined or caught a slight nervousness in his voice. “Come, let’s go upstairs.”

You knew the way to his bedroom with your eyes closed by now. The familiarity of the place did not, however, take off the edge of tension. When you entered, he didn’t sit down. Instead, he looked at you with serious eyes. 

“Princess, if I’m understanding right, you’re here because you want me to have sex with you,” he started, pausing to give you time to disagree. You didn’t. “Are you sure about it?” 

“Yes, I am,” you nodded. “I’ve thought about it a lot and I want to do it. The more I let myself worry, the more I’ll stall.” 

“And you’re sure that you’re ready?” he asked again, stepping closer to you and wrapping his arms gently around your waist. “I promised to help you and I will, but you know that I don’t want you to feel pressured to do something like this.”

“I know, Jaem,” you said, barely hearing your voice yourself. A confession was almost on your lips, but you’d already prepared what you could say to him instead. “Yes, I’m anxious, but I trust you. I’ve thought about this enough to know that I want to do it with you.”

“Okay,” he responded softly, a small smile curving his lips. “Let me know if you change your mind at any point.” 

All it took was a nod from you and his lips were pressed against yours. It started slow, almost as if both of you were just savoring the moment and you loved it. Then he took a step back to his bed, pulling you with him.

Before you had time to think about it, you were sitting in his lap, legs on both sides of his. Your fingers buried in his hair and his hands gripping onto your sides almost desperately. You rolled your hips down and he pulled away from the kiss to groan quietly, then pressed his lips against your neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses along your skin. You let out a shaky breath and leaned your head to the side. When he pulled away, your eyes met and you felt an excited shiver run down your spine. 

“Princess, can I take off your clothes?” he asked, a reassuring smile curving his lips. “And I’m gonna need to hear you on this, okay?”

You chuckled and rolled your eyes, but leaned down to peck his lips. 

“Okay,” you agreed as you looked at him again. “Yes, you can, and if it’s okay, take yours off as well, please.” 

You had just a second to register his pleased smile before he started undressing you. His fingers started swiftly working on pulling off your top and then followed your shorts, leaving you in a mismatched white lacy bra and panties with kittens. An amused chuckle left his lips and he smirked at you teasingly. 

“Listen, I wasn’t planning on this when I was getting ready in the morning,” you defended yourself, flustered with embarrassment. 

“That’s okay, it’s cute,” he smiled and pecked your nose. Then he carefully lifted you by the thighs and let you sit on the bed instead. “Get comfortable for me, okay? I’ll be with you in a second.” 

You nodded, yet didn’t move at all, instead choosing to watch as he took off his clothes. You’d seen him naked many times already yet it never failed to amaze you. And, well, more or less you were looking with new eyes, heart pounding loudly in your chest as you marveled at the sight. Plus, you were naked in front of him for the first time as well… 

“If you keep looking at me like that, I’ll end up forgetting to take it slow,” Jaemin chuckled and you quickly shifted your gaze to his face instead, heat rushing to your face, but also between your legs. He stepped in front of you again and leaned down to be closer to you. “Now, I want you to promise me, if something feels good, you tell me, if something doesn’t, you also tell me.” 

“I will,” you nodded, smiling a little. There was something in the way he spoke, confident yet ever so caring, that made you want to let him do just anything he wanted. 

“Good girl,” he said, pecking your forehead. “Now, first of all, foreplay - always a good thing, goes both ways. But since I’m excited enough as it is, we’ll focus on you this time, okay?” 

He waited for you to voice out your agreement before helping you move up on the bed and get comfortable, hovering over you as he kissed you again. His lips moved against yours slowly and sensually, as one of his hands took hold of your waist. Then it started sliding upwards, moving to your back so he could unclip your bra almost too easily. You expected him to pull away and look, but his lips remained on yours. It was only his fingers that carefully found their way under the fabric and gently rubbed over your nipple. You let out a whimper in the kiss and felt him smirk a little. 

For a short moment, it was as if he was just playing around, fondling your breast or pinching your nipple occasionally. And while you did like it, it was annoyingly not enough. Reluctantly you pulled away from your kiss and pouted at him. 

“Jaem, please, I need you to do more,” you asked quietly, a pleased smile from him meeting your words. And god, you realized, you’d do anything to see more of those. 

“That’s it, I want to hear how I can do better at all times,” he said, almost as if he’d just been testing you. Although you’d guess that he was also just teasing you. Both were equally plausible.

But you didn’t have time to ponder over that as his lips pressed against your jaw and started working their way down. In the meantime, he got rid of your bra, yet you were surprised when suddenly something wet brushed along your nipple. You gasped and looked down to Jaemin looking up at you with a playful spark in his eyes. He hadn’t asked yet you still nodded and then his lips wrapped around the sensitive bud.

He sucked and teased it with his tongue, then moved along to the other one, drawing small whimpers out of you as he worked you up little by little. At one point though, his lips stopped a little higher up your chest and he started sucking persistently on that spot. He only pulled away when you couldn’t help but squirm a little. 

“Did you just leave a hickey on my boob?” you scoffed in amusement, eyebrows raised. 

“Not exactly your boob but close enough,” he grinned. “It’s not that high up, you can hide it, don’t worry.” 

You hadn’t even thought about that. You couldn’t tell him that you didn’t care, so instead you just nodded. You waited for a moment but he didn’t do anything else and you could feel anxiousness starting to build up in you again. 

“So what comes now?” you asked, cringing internally at how dumb that sounded. “I mean like-” you tried to explain but he shushed you with a peck. 

“Can I eat you out?” he asked with a smile that felt too innocent for his question. 

“God, please do,” you blurted out. The knowing look on his face told you that he knew how much you’d wanted that, yet he didn’t say anything. 

Instead, with small open-mouthed kisses, he made his way down your body, settling between your legs. He took a moment to just press featherlight kisses along your thighs. Then his lips pressed against your still clothed clit and your thighs twitched. You couldn’t help but moan quietly when you felt his tongue glide over your soaked slit through your panties. It was so good but it could be so much better, you thought and squirmed a little. You felt his light chuckle more than you heard it as he slowly dragged down your underwear and threw it to the side. And then finally, finally, his tongue met your bare pussy. 

As his lips wrapped around your clit and his tongue pressed down on it lightly, you could swear you were going to lose your mind by the time he was done. And it would be worth it. He lapped kittenishly at the sensitive spot, only moving occasionally to focus on your slit for a short while instead. You were a moaning mess almost too quickly but it all felt so good you couldn’t even feel embarrassed about it. 

Jaemin’s fingers brushed along your thighs and you couldn’t tell if he meant to tease you or not but you couldn’t help but squirm in his hold. He chuckled against you, sending a shiver down your spine and a whine out your lips. 

“Nana, can you please…” you mustered up the courage to speak up, although not very coherently “fingers, your fingers…” 

He pulled away, a string of saliva connecting his lips and your clit. When he licked his lips, it broke, but the sight of his puffy lips glistening with your arousal was enough to have you whimpering again. 

“You want my fingers inside of you, princess?” he asked to confirm and you nodded quickly. “Of course, anything for you,” he smiled and one of his hands immediately reached down between your legs.

His fingers brushed over your hole teasingly before one of them slipped inside you pumping slowly. You squirmed in pleasure, grasping at the bedsheet as you struggled to hold back a moan. Jaemin didn’t seem to help with that though, as his tongue was back on you a moment later. Between his mouth and his finger curling inside you and pressing against your walls, you were easily far too gone. 

“So good,” you whimpered out. “So close, please, don’t stop,” you pleaded, feeling the orgasm building up dangerously. 

Diligently, he obeyed your plea and soon you were slipping over the edge, a moan of his name on your lips, fingers clutching the sheets in a death grip. His tongue worked on you gently until you started calming down finally and only then did he pull away and sit up to look at you. 

“Such a sweet princess you are,” he praised gently and reached over to stroke your head. When you blinked up at him in confusion, he chuckled. “You let me know what you wanted and you also told me what felt good.” 

“You take such a strong stance on that whole thing,” you muttered and he laughed. 

“Because that’s how you learn, babe,” he pointed out. “You listen to what the other person says. I want you to feel good, and I also want you to understand that it’s okay to voice out your needs or preferences, okay?” 

What he said made sense, and although it wasn’t something you were hearing for the first time, you guessed it was nice of him to make sure that you felt comfortable enough to apply it in practice. But that was not what made butterflies rise in your stomach. It was the pet name. Jaemin often called you princess. While it always made you feel soft and mushy on the inside, you were used to it and didn’t give it too much thought. But babe? Babe was something only Karina called you platonically. But babe was also something that from him sounded too nice. You brushed the thought away. 

“Okay,” you agreed. “Can I touch you?” you asked and that earned you another one of those gorgeous pleased smiles. 

“Be my guest,” he said, leaning down to peck your neck again. “Oh, how I would love to cover you in love bites,” he mumbled against your skin and you couldn’t tell if he was telling you or just thinking out loud. You wanted to tell him that he could, but a small still rational part in your brain convinced you against it. 

Hooking one of your arms over his shoulder, you reached your free hand out and carefully wrapped it around his cock, stroking it slowly. You teased the tip and Jaemin exhaled slowly against your skin, burying his face in your neck. You sped up your hand movement a little, squeezing your fingers around him gently and he groaned, grabbing your hips. 

“Is this good?” you asked quietly, heart thumping in your chest. 

“So good,” he groaned, pressing his lips to your collarbone shortly. “But if you could do it faster, it would be amazing.” 

You were happy to oblige, even happier when you felt him shiver in your arms. Yet as soon as a moan escaped his lips, he was fumbling to stop you. 

“I don’t want to come before I’m inside you,” he explained breathlessly to your quizzical look and you bit your lips. 

Right. He would soon be inside you. That same dick you were just stroking would be entering you and nervousness found its way to you again.

“Princess, stay with me,” Jaemin called out, stroking your hair gently. “Are you still sure you want to do this?” 

“I am,” you confirmed, your free arm joining the other one around his neck. “I’m just nervous. Is it going to hurt?” 

“It might,” he confirmed what you already knew. “But for that reason, we have…” Instead of finishing his sentence, he reached over to his bedside drawer and pulled out a bottle of lube. “You’re already quite wet, but it’s always easier with some additional help.” 

You nodded in understanding and he sat back up to pour some of the liquid onto his fingers. He rubbed his fingers together to make sure they were properly covered and then brought them down between your legs. You shivered slightly at the cool wet feeling and Jaemin looked up at you. 

“Oh, no, I’m okay,” you quickly assured him. “Go for it.” 

Two of his fingers pushed inside you slowly. It wasn’t your first time using lube so you knew what to expect, but you still couldn’t help but moan at the feeling as his fingers started working inside you and spreading you out. As you relaxed more into his touch, he carefully added a third finger and you let out something between a gasp and a moan. Jaemin chuckled quietly, rubbing his thumb over your clit. 

“If you do that again, I might actually cry,” you whimpered and he laughed. “I think… I don’t really know, but I think I’ll be fine like this, can we…” 

“Yes, princess?” he chirped as if he didn’t know crystal clear what you meant. You scoffed, feeling heat rush down your whole body. 

“Jaemin, just fuck me already, please,” you said as decisively as you could without your voice shaking. 

“Come here, princess,” he smiled, pulling you to sit up in front of him. “You’ll help me put on the condom.” 

“Why me?” you asked, narrowing your eyebrows. “I think you know how to do it yourself.” 

“I do know,” he rolled his eyes jokingly, “but that doesn’t mean it wouldn’t feel nice if you did it instead.” 

You let out a small ‘oh’ and nodded, so he smiled and handed you the packet. When you looked down, you noticed it wasn’t the one you’d brought and chuckled slightly at the idea that he had been prepared already. You tore it open and pulled out the rubber. 

“Squeeze it here,” Jaemin instructed and your fingers pinched at the closed end. “Now put it on and roll it down.” 

You followed through, experimentally stroking his shaft a couple of times once it was fully on. 

“Good enough?” you asked, looking up to meet Jaemin’s eyes again. You couldn’t stop yourself from leaning up and kissing him shortly. 

“Perfect,” he smiled. 

He reached over for the lube once again, pouring some of it on his hand again and then stroking himself a few times as you watched a little curiously. Jaemin used his free hand to tilt up your chin and tsked quietly. You pouted but he pecked away your pout and pushed you back until you were laying down again. 

“Ready?” he asked and despite the anxious shiver that ran down your spine, you said yes. 

It started out slow. You wouldn’t say it was really that painful but you could definitely feel the stretch, thankful for the lube Jaemin had generously applied. You heard yourself whimper out at some point and he immediately stopped, peppering your face with little kisses. 

“I’m good,” you assured him with a trembling voice, gently threading your fingers through his hair, “kiss me and keep going.” 

And he did. His lips pressed against yours in what was probably the sweetest and most gentle kiss in your life so far. At the same time, his hips pushed forward again. You got so lost in the kiss that it took you a while to notice that he’d stopped again. He was already fully inside you, you realized, as you broke the kiss. 

“How are you feeling, princess?” he asked quietly. 

“Good, I’m feeling good,” you said honestly, brushing through his hair, already damp with sweat. “How are you feeling?” 

“Never been better,” he chuckled, pecking your nose. “You feel so good around me. And you’re doing so good.” 

“Is it hard for you to go so slow and hold back?” you smiled, twirling a strand of his hair around your finger. You were beaming on the inside from his praise though. 

“Don’t think about it, okay?” he grinned and you giggled. “Take your time and tell me when you’re okay to go on.” 

“It’s okay, Jaem, you can move,” you said and he raised his eyebrows doubtfully. “I’m sure, just don’t go all out on me from the start, hm?” 

“As you say,” he smiled and pecked you again. 

And then started moving slowly. It took you a moment to get used to the feeling of his dick sliding in and out of you, but soon enough you were already moaning softly, gripping onto his hair in pleasure. You made sure to let him know that you liked it, that you were okay with going faster, with going harder and he followed through. 

You were seeing stars again. Jaemin was working his magic on you again, your moans were mixing with his and the sounds of sex. When he leaned down to kiss you again, you whimpered against his lips. You were so close to cumming again and by the tension in his body, you could guess he was too. 

“Jaem, I’m close,” you whimpered as you pulled away from the kiss and he smiled against your lips. “Keep going, please.” 

“Of course, princess,” he responded, voice raspy and low and you could cum just from that.

Truth be told, it took so little after that that maybe you did indeed. Your orgasm washed over you so intensely that you were digging your nails in his shoulder blades so hard you were sure you’d leave marks, only self-aware enough to move your hands from his hair before you’d pulled out a chunk of it.

You only somewhat registered Jaemin cumming as well once he started gradually slowing down and came to a stop. You were both panting heavily, too blown out to even move at the moment. You brought one of your hands up again to stroke his hair gently and his forehead dropped onto your shoulder. 

You weren’t sure how long you’d spent that way before he finally moved, pulling out of you and taking off the condom. You sat up in the bed crossing your legs as he tied the rubber, then went to throw it in the bin. Then he came to sit next to you, pushing a few sweaty strands of hair away from your face. 

“So… how do you feel, princess?” he asked carefully. “Does it hurt anywhere? Did you like it?” 

“I feel honestly great,” you hummed, smiling a little. “It was amazing. I knew I made a good choice with you, thank you so much.” 

“Well, congrats, your basic Sex Ed course has been completed, you’re ready to conquer a man’s bed,” he smiled in response and ruffled your hair. 

Despite the lighthearted truth in his statement, your heart clenched painfully. 

“Nana, can I go take a shower?” you asked instead of acknowledging his words. 

If he noticed your avoidance, he didn’t comment on it. Instead, he found you a towel to use, brought your clothes to the bathroom for you, and explained to you which bottle contained what. He didn’t offer to join you and you couldn’t decide whether you were relieved or disappointed. You didn’t offer either. 

As hot water started pouring on you, you let out a quiet sight. There was no doubt anymore. You were down, and you were down bad. You couldn’t go back to being Jaemin’s friend. It had been easier with Renjun, you’d only ever imagined what being with him would be like. But with Jaemin, you knew. And you didn’t know if you could bear letting it go. 

You ordered yourself not to cry. As you washed your body, your eyes fell on the hickey he’d left you. You reminisced over the past three months. About all the times he’d stolen kisses from you for no apparent reason. About his little remarks of ‘I imagined this’ or ‘I wanted to do this’ or ‘I’ve been waiting for this’. About the way he looked at you sometimes. About the game stall owner’s words. About the photos. 

A small traitorous part of you wanted to put those pieces together and maybe hope that he’d have some feelings for you too. It sounded too good to be real, yet what if… 

Clinging onto that little hope, you dried your body, got dressed again, and returned to his bedroom. He’d put on loose gray sweatpants and a black t-shirt while you were gone and he looked too good in that. You couldn’t help yourself as you walked over and pecked his lips. 

“Thank you,” you said softly. 

“You don’t need to thank me for anything,” he smiled in response. “Would you like to stay over?” 

“Sorry, my parents will be waiting for me,” you shook your head. Half a truth, as your parents were indeed home but you’d doubted they would disagree if you told them where you were. You just needed some time to think everything through. “I’ll see you tomorrow at school, okay?” 

You could have imagined the disappointment on his face. But as you made your way home, you let the idea warm you up. By the time you reached your front door, you’d made up your mind - distancing yourself would be impossible, and hiding your feelings was going to do you more harm than good.

You were going to be honest with him.

~

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[jaemanon]

Like The Stars Pt. 2

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4

Pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, sex lessons au, friends to lovers

Word Count: ~8,8k

Includes: high school seniors (everyone is legal of age); canon bisexual mc; side characters donghyuck, renjun, and karina; profanities; obviously, sex lessons; kind of a slow burn?; mc being oblivious and kind of innocent but hopefully not in an annoying way; a blowjob + fingering (going slow and steady, yes)

Summary: you'd had a crush on renjun for as long as you could remember, but your lack of experience always stopped you from taking the first step; it's a good thing you have your trusted friend jaemin to help you out

Author's note: okay so here is the part 2 of this little story ! once again, thank you all so much for all the love you've given to pt1, i appreciate all of you so much ! i hope you'll enjoy this part just as much ^^ disclaimer, time moves weirdly in this, please close your eyes and pretend it makes sense ehe-

Despite your genuine intention, it took more than a couple of weeks before your lessons went further. It’d been in fact almost two months now. Not that you didn't have… sessions, during that period. No, it was just that every time you tried to go on, you got anxious again and instead, just repeated what you already had tried. At least you could say you were getting better at handjobs by now, as Jaemin had given you more tips and advice, as well as simply letting you get more practice.

Yet you were getting frustrated with yourself - why were you so scared by the idea of a blowjob? It was dumb. Especially since the whole point was that you could have a safe environment and someone you trust who would guide you and not mock you if you messed up. So you figured that it was about damn time.

Jaemin had invited you over to his place as he needed help with English and you had happily agreed - as someone who traveled a lot, it was safe to say that you were more than able to help. Currently, the two of you were sitting on the floor in his room, notebooks spread between you two as you did your best to explain to him the different forms of past tense and their proper uses. 

You were in the middle of explaining how past perfect tense worked when he suddenly let out a loud huff and plopped down to lay on his back.

“This is so annoying!” he whined, kicking up one of his legs slightly. “I don't wanna study anymore, who cares if I fail the class!”

You raised your eyebrows at him and reached over, slapping his knee. 

“Stop acting like a spoiled child, Nana” you scolded, yet a small smile curved your lips in endearment. 

“Y/N, I am a spoiled child,” he said, raising his head to look at you. Upon noticing your smile, he grinned back immediately and stood up. “Come on, don't tell me you actually wanna just keep your nose buried in these notebooks the whole afternoon,” he raised his eyebrows. Your only response was shaking your head slightly in disappointment. 

He huffed again and pouted, picking up his pen again as you once again started explaining. Unfortunately, it wasn't even 5 minutes later when he interrupted you again: “Okay, I can't focus for real, I'm sorry.”

“Alright, enough for today,” you hummed. Truth be told, you too weren't in the mood to go on, especially if it wouldn't help at all. The two of you quickly discarded the now unneeded books and you looked at him. “So what should we do then?”

Jaemin shrugged, leaning his back on the bed behind him.

“Anything you wanna do specifically?” he turned the question to you, a soft smile on his lips. 

Your mind spiraled away through what options you had, until the lesson you had just finished reminded you of the lessons you had yet to go through. Biting your lips, you looked at him. 

“I think I'm ready to go further,” you said quietly, hoping he would understand. When he looked at you with confusion, you clarified: “With my own lessons. If you're okay with that, of course.”

He looked at you for a long moment and you were almost getting anxious when he chuckled.

“I never would have expected that you'd be so excited to learn about sex, princess.” His tone held no objection or mockery though, simply amusement, so you rolled your eyes in response.

“I don't remember you disagreeing even once,” you pointed out and he scoffed slightly, leaning closer to you.

“Would you talk back like that if I was Renjun?” he asked quietly and for a second, you felt like there was something more behind those words. Yet his usual grin was back again in a blink as he got up off his spot and made his way to sit on the bed again.

Seeing him get comfortable, you lifted yourself slightly and crawled over to him, plopping down on your knees. When you looked up at him, you found him staring at you, eyebrows raised in surprise.

“Way to set the mood,” he chuckled a bit awkwardly, reaching over to cup your chin gently. “Don't push yourself too hard, okay?” 

You nodded slightly in confirmation, gently pressing your palm over his crotch. You started rubbing slow circles over his length and he let go of your face in favor of resting his arms on his sides for balance. It didn't take long before you felt him get hard under your touch so you pulled your hand away and reached up to undo his pants, pulling them down along with his underwear. By now you had grown used to seeing his dick, yet now that you were planning on putting it in your mouth, the anxiousness from the first time was back. To distract yourself, you looked up at him again.

“Say, would you mind taking your t-shirt off for me this time?” you asked, fluttering your eyelashes at him fakely. 

“You're gonna be the death of me,” he laughed, yet obliged quickly, the fabric thrown somewhere to the side and quickly forgotten about. 

You took a moment just to admire his upper body. He wasn't really buff, yet his muscles were well defined. You couldn't help but reach up and gently trace the outline of his abs, feeling the muscles tense slightly under your touch.

“Sorry, I-” you pulled your hand away quickly.

“No, it's okay,” he reassured you quickly with a short exhale. “That's nice”. You smiled at him in appreciation and your hand was back at its spot, gently touching his stomach. 

Slowly, you dragged it down his skin until it reached his half-hard length and you wrapped your hand around him as your other one came to rest on his thigh. You started stroking him slowly, your main goal right now was to work him up enough. You had come to learn that teasing slow touches and occasionally tightening your grip around him worked great for this so it didn't take you long to have him fully hard. 

“Remember, take it slow, okay?” he made sure to say, though his voice was already a bit strained. “Don't go all in at once and you don't have to right away take it in your mouth. You can just use your tongue at first.” 

You hummed and leaned down, dragging your tongue up the underside of his length, drawing a curse out of him. You couldn't help but smile as you repeated the action and he squirmed slightly. You pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the side, squeezing your hand around him gently, then moved your lips up to the tip. That was it, you were finally doing it. Inhaling through your nose, you wrapped your lips around the head and your tongue licked at the slit. 

You looked up to see how he would react and found him staring at you intensely, body tensed up as if he was trying to hold back from reacting. When his eyes met yours, he cursed quietly under his breath and one of his hands moved to curl into your hair. His touch was surprisingly gentle as he rubbed your scalp reassuringly.

“You're doing great so far, princess,” he praised quietly. 

Suppressing your smile, you twirled your tongue around his tip and at the same time started stroking him with your hand again. Okay, truth be told, you had done a little bit of research on your own - not that you didn't trust that Jaemin would be a good enough teacher, you just wanted to make him proud and you couldn't do that without any real idea of how blowjobs worked. Judging by the way his hips twitched, it was worth it. You did want to make him feel as good as possible though, so finally mustering up the courage, you opened your lips wider and started moving down, trying to take as much as you could of him.

Obviously, though, you had overestimated yourself as not even halfway down, you started feeling uncomfortable and you had to slow down. You felt a tug at your hair, which you took as a sign to go on so you forced yourself to go further, yet a new one, a bit harder came.

“Stop- fuck, Y/N, stop,” Jaemin groaned out and you immediately pulled away, scared you'd fucked up everything.

“What did I do wrong?” you asked immediately after you took a proper breath, looking up at him with a sense of panic filling you up. 

“You didn't-” he started, pausing as if to rearrange his thoughts or to find the proper words. “You haven't done anything wrong, princess,” Jaemin said finally, looking at you with gentle eyes. “Trust me, you are doing really well.”

“Then why did you want me to stop?” your voice was quiet and you bit your lips. 

“You're focusing too much on what you think you should do next,” he responded, gently stroking your hair, which soothed the slight sting from the pull earlier. “Relax, okay? If these things are done the way they should be, both you and your partner should be enjoying it. You have the upper hand, you're the one in control right now, don't rush through it just to cover everything.” You blinked up at him, confused at what he meant exactly. “You tried to go all the way down, didn't you?” he asked and you nodded slightly. “Don't. I mean, do it if you want to, obviously, but do it when you feel ready, not just because you think that's what's supposed to happen next. You're doing so well, just go with what feels comfortable for you.”

“Okay,” you hummed quietly and the smile that curved his lips was so endearing that you felt fluttering in your chest. You leaned down again, yet he spoke up again, pulling your attention.

“Go slow and have fun. And if you're not having fun, stop, okay?” He was staring at you intensely so you nodded in confirmation, a silent reassurance that you wanted to do this.

Back on track, you took the tip back between your lips, sucking gently as your hand was once again moving along his shaft at a moderate pace. Then you thought about his words - have fun. You slowed down your hand, having just the tips of your fingers press against his skin. You started pressing open-mouthed kisses against his length, occasionally licking gently. Jaemin's hand moved back into your hair.

“Do you really have to be a fucking tease?” he whined out, though you thought whining wasn't what he was going for. “I've been waiting for this for so long and you…”

“I'm having fun,” you said innocently, licking your lips as you pulled away and looked up at him, brushing your thumb down the underside of his dick. The slight twitch of his body made you smile slightly and you tightened your grip around him again, this time a little harder.

“Shouldn't have said that,” he groaned out, leaning his head back and exposing his neck to you. You laughed in amusement, yet you couldn't help but think about marking him up again. He was right, it was best not to do it to avoid someone catching up. Yet maybe if they weren't visible… 

Still having your hand stroke him at a slow pace, you moved your lips on his inner thigh. You kissed the skin gently, and you could see in the corner of your eye his head shooting up to look at you. You decided to give it a try and started sucking lightly. When he didn't try to stop you, you took on the job more seriously, nibbling on his skin and sucking harder. His thigh shivered slightly under your lips. You pulled away only when you were sure a mark would be left and you were not disappointed. 

You looked up again at him and found him biting his lips. He seemed so tense and you realized that you'd forgotten about your initial task, your hand only loosely wrapped around the base of his dick. You mumbled an apology and brought your lips back to his tip. This time you felt a little better, you were pretty sure you could do this. Wrapping your lips around him, you slowly started taking him in again. You felt the same pressure from before, yet this time you were better prepared for it. Relaxing your jaw, you pulled out to the tip and then went back down as much as you could. 

Your mouth was working slowly, your tongue helping here and there. You looked up for a reaction but you were not prepared for the groan that left Jaemin's lips as your eyes met his.

“You look so sinfully beautiful like this, fuck-” he gasped out, his hips twitching up slightly.

You felt pride fill you up again and that alone was enough to motivate you to go lower. The pressure increased and you couldn't help but choke slightly. What you didn't expect was to hear Jaemin moan out your name at that. Your eyes widened slightly and you felt a shiver run down your spine. Up until now, he had been giving positive reactions to whatever you did to him, but this was the first time you had heard something as vocal as that. In all honesty, you loved it. So you wanted to try it again. Yet as you once again started taking more of him in your mouth, you felt Jaemin's grip on your hair tighten. His self-control seemed to not be enough for this as he bucked his hips up. The movement wasn't big, but it was sharp and you couldn't help but choke again.

Jaemin groaned lowly, eyes closed as if he was trying to focus on you and your mouth only. His fingers loosened their hold on your hair gently again and you were relieved to be able to pull away a bit. Maybe with a little more practice, you'd be able to do this for longer. Now was not that moment so instead, you focused on the amount of him that you were comfortable with in your mouth. You kept your hand on the part that you couldn't cover. 

You were starting to feel a little overwhelmed already. It felt like you'd been doing this for quite some time and you considered pulling away for a breath and asking if you were not doing something right. But with one harder squeeze of your fingers around his length, you felt him tense up in that way that you knew indicated he would cum soon. 

“I'm close, princess,” he breathed out heavily, opening his eyes to look at you. You noticed how dilated his pupils were. “You don't have to- you can pull away and finish up with just your hands, otherwise it might be a bit too much for a first time,” he advised. The effort he put into making sure to be considerate and helpful was touching. So you decided to give it a shot.

Instead of pulling away, you focused on sucking harder and speeding up your movements as much as you could, bringing him over to the edge quicker than you'd expected. Suddenly, you felt a warm liquid fill your mouth and you pulled away a little so you could swallow comfortably. At first, it was okay, his cum felt a little too thick but you could manage. But quickly it did indeed get too much and you felt some of it escape the corners of your mouth. You swallowed as much as you could before finally pulling away. 

You looked up at him once again. He was breathing heavily, sweat glistening on his skin and his eyes were frozen on your mouth. You quickly wiped away the cum that was still on your chin, imagining you probably looked kinda disgusting, looking away embarrassed. He had specifically told you not to try that yet, but you had overestimated yourself and ended up making a mess of yourself. 

“So fucking gorgeous,” you heard him mumble and your eyes widened slightly, looking back at him in surprise. He chuckled quietly, leaning down to brush your hair away from your face and carefully wiping the corners of your lips. “I wanna scold you for not listening to me, yet I also wanna kiss you so much right now because you look so damn hot.”

You blinked in confusion, your brain not fully understanding how you could have possibly looked hot with cum dribbling down your chin.

“Did you really… find that attractive?” you asked doubtfully and he laughed. 

“Come here,” he said, tapping his thighs and you carefully stood up, sitting in his lap. Well almost stumbling in it as your knees nearly gave out when you stood up. “Can I kiss you?” 

“But I just-” you started, but he shushed you and cupped your cheek. He leaned closer but didn't press his lips against yours just yet. You realized he was waiting for confirmation. “Well, if it doesn't disturb you at all, yes,” you said quietly. 

He was kissing you before you even had time to process it. His lips were moving against yours, a hint of almost desperation in the way he pushed his tongue in your mouth. You had a second to question how he didn't feel gross about kissing you while the taste of him was still in your mouth before thoughts left your mind completely and you kissed back, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing closer to him. When you pulled away, he licked his lips and pressed them against your neck gently in a soft peck, making you shiver. 

“You did so well, princess,” he mumbled against your skin and you felt yourself heating up. His arms wrapped around your waist as if to pull you closer, yet he didn't do that. “You're always doing your best, I am so proud of you.”

“Nana?” It's not that you didn't appreciate the praise, on the contrary, you loved hearing it. But his voice was so soft and full of appreciation, that you were a little confused. 

As if the sound of his name pulled him from a trance, he pulled away from your skin and unwrapped his arms from you.

“Anyways, I'm sorry to ask you to move again but I should get dressed again, so…” he chuckled and you got up from him. He pulled his pants back on, dug out a new t-shirt, and returned to the bed, getting in it as he offered his arm to you. “Cuddles?”

You weren't one to say no so with a smile you quickly got on the bed as well, laying down next to him. You curled up on his side, one of his arms wrapping around your waist gently.  Sighing quietly, you got comfortable and closed your eyes. Not that you wanted to sleep at the moment, but it was just peaceful enough that you felt like you could. Yet your mind was still a little bit stuck on what you had been doing just a few minutes ago. 

“Nana… were you- holding back earlier?” you asked, eyes focused on the ceiling above your heads instead of the boy.

“I'm always holding back when I'm with you, princess,” he chuckled and you felt like there was something more in that confession that you should have caught onto, yet you weren't sure what it was exactly. “By the way, I was thinking…” You hummed, looking at him in expectation. “I know this is technically to help you and all, but… well, obviously I get quite a lot from it so…”

“Come on, what is it?” you pushed, the pauses in his sentences making it obvious to you that he was stalling. You weren't even sure what to expect from him in this situation.

“Well, as I said, I won't do anything to you that you haven't asked me for, but…” he sighed, looking at you finally. “I was thinking that it's not fair that only you do all the work so… if you ever, like, need me to return the favor or something, I'd be happy to help.”

You raised your eyebrows at him, and suddenly the image of him going down on you came back to your mind. 

“So if I asked you to get me off right now, you'd agree?” you asked to confirm if you'd really understood him. Yet he seemed to take it as an invitation, or maybe it was just blatantly obvious that you were in fact quite needy as a small smirk curved his lips and the hand that was wrapped around your waist subtly moved lower down your stomach.

“I like to think that I'm quite skilled in this so I promise you won't be disappointed, princess,” he said and you almost wanted to smack him just to wipe the confidence off his face. Almost. Except that it sent a tingle down your spine and your breath caught in your throat when you felt his fingers press gently against the wetness between your legs. He raised his eyebrows slightly. “Shit, you do seem like you need it quite a lot right now.”

You opened your mouth to say something - defend yourself or remind him about how easily he got worked up every time you touched him. But you didn't get a chance to voice out anything as at that moment someone rang the doorbell. Jaemin froze, a curse escaping him a second later and he pulled away. 

“I completely forgot I promised Renjun we'd play today,” he sighed as he got up off the bed. It took you a moment to realize then your eyes widened. 

“Wait, that's Renjun at the door?!” you asked, your voice rising slightly as you sat up immediately. Jaemin nodded and you felt like this had to be some cruel joke. 

You got off the bed and rushed over to the mirror in his room. As you suspected, your hair was a mess and your lips were still puffy from earlier. You cursed under your nose, reaching for Jaemin's hairbrush to at least get your hair to look normal. Once you deemed yourself presentable enough, the two of you made your way downstairs and Jaemin went to open. 

“Hey, man, come in,” he greeted, grinning at the slightly older boy and stepping to the side so he could enter. “Sorry I took a while, Y/N is here, she was helping me with English,” he explained and you were glad that there was a normal reason for you to be at his place initially.

“Oh, hey, Y/N!” Renjun beamed at you when his eyes met yours and you smiled back, waving at him. “Sorry to interrupt your study session,” he said and the irony of it almost made you laugh.

“It's okay,” you reassured, fingers playing with the bracelet on your wrist nervously. “Do you two want me to leave you or something?”

“Oh, no, we'd love you to stay,” Jaemin was the first one to reply, grinning. “If you don't mind watching us play, of course.”

You shook your head to confirm you didn't in fact mind just watching and so the three of you moved to the living room where Jaemin's gaming console was situated. 

Jaemin wasn't known for having a strong competitive spirit, yet for some reason, at the moment he seemed determined to not allow Renjun to win. Renjun, on the other side, was always competitive. Legs thrown over Jaemin's lap on the couch, you watched the most intense gameplay you'd ever seen. Your eyes moved to Renjun who had chosen to take a spot cross-legged on the floor next to the couch, eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he pressed buttons on his joystick furiously. You chuckled quietly, looking up at Jaemin instead. There was determination in his eyes that you were not used to seeing. His jaw was clenched tightly and you couldn't help but admire his side profile for a second. He was an extremely good-looking boy, no wonder girls in school were so whipped for him. Well, obviously you had always known that but in the light of the most recent events between you two, you felt like you were seeing him in a new light.

Then you looked back at Renjun again. You had been in love with him almost as long as you could remember knowing him. Obviously, he was attractive, although it was in a different way from Jaemin. Renjun was somehow softer to look at, largely due to the fact that he was shorter and more petite. You knew that below the softness he was fiery and not to be messed with, but you had always been, well, soft for him. Thinking about it, you weren't sure if you had ever thought about him in a sexual way. You didn't think that was a bad thing. But you couldn't really bring yourself to imagine being intimate with him even right now, nervousness filling you as you attempted that, unlike how comfortable you felt with Jaemin. 

Caught up in your head, you had forgotten about the game the two boys were playing and you were pretty startled when Jaemin suddenly jumped up with a victorious shout, making your legs fall to the side and causing you to lose your balance as you nearly fell off the couch. 

“You don't usually care this much about winning, Jaemin,” Renjun laughed, shaking his head slightly, although you could see on his face the disappointment and frustration of losing. 

“We don't usually have an audience,” Jaemin pointed out, turning his shining eyes to you as a grin spread his lips. “I dedicate this win to you, princess. And I also believe I deserve a congratulatory kiss for it.”

He was joking, obviously, he had to be. He couldn't have just asked you to kiss him in front of Renjun. You stared at him wide-eyed, your legs still dangling awkwardly from the couch. Yet no laugh came and no ‘just kidding’ so you had to assume he really meant it. Glancing shortly at Renjun, you stood up and told yourself to relax, smiling at him. 

"Oh, my brave knight in shining armor, you have made me the happiest person in this room by winning for me a game that I don’t even know the name of," you said dramatically as you leaned over and pressed a peck against his cheek, his smile widening even more. 

Renjun's eyes moved between you two, his eyebrows raised as if he was trying to piece everything together and make sense of it.

“You two have gotten closer recently,” he remarked and for a second you were scared he'd assume something which would not be true at all. You were ready to say something to distract him, yet he spoke up first. "I'm happy to see it, though. I always thought you’re a bit too distant." 

You felt relief wash over you - he thought you were simply better friends. Well, you guessed he was right about that. But at least he hadn't caught up that there could be more behind that.

“This boy is tragic in English, I have to come to help him quite often,” you chuckled. 

Jaemin shot you a quick upset look that appeared as if feeling betrayed that you'd called him out on his English skills (which weren't even that bad, to begin with), yet you felt bad for lying like that, even though you knew that you couldn't possibly tell Renjun the truth.

~

The school cafeteria was emptier than usual as one of the teachers had called in sick today and everyone who had classes with her had had a free period. As a result, some of the students who had classes with her before or after lunch break had decided to go for a meal somewhere outside. Well, your friend group wasn't among those people so you were, as usual, sitting on one of the tables in the back of the room, each munching on something. 

“Oh, Jaemin, how did your English test go?” you asked suddenly, remembering that his English class had been one of his first. 

“I think I've got it,” he grinned proudly, winking at you and you rolled your eyes, yet smiled at him. 

“Well, no wonder, if Y/N has been helping you out and you still manage to fail, you must be a complete idiot,” Renjun noted, taking a bite of his sandwich. At the questioning look on the other two of your friends' faces, he blinked. “You guys didn't know as well? Turns out these two have been having English lessons together for a while now.”

“Oh, makes sense why you suddenly got so much closer with him then," Karina commented, a piece of chicken forgotten on her fork as she looked between you two. “I was starting to wonder since you never really said anything,” she grinned almost knowingly, setting her fork down and taking a sip of her drink instead. 

“I know, right?” Renjun laughed. “Yesterday when I was over, they seemed so comfortable together, she even played along with his dumb flirting.”

“Yep, I just didn't think that's really something worth mentioning,” you nodded quickly. 

Were you really going to get away so easily? Karina and Renjun didn't seem to really suspect anything, it seemed. But then your eyes moved to Hyuck and you found him looking at you with a calculating look on his face. You looked away, pretending you hadn't noticed. Hopefully, he wouldn't figure it out in the end. Hopefully, he wouldn't mention it. 

Yet hope was a dangerous thing, you realized when you walked out of your next class and found Donghyuck waiting for you, arms crossed in front of his chest. 

“You're having sex, aren't you?” he asked bluntly and you looked around frantically. No one seemed to pay you two attention. 

“No!” you tried to deny quickly, but the look on his face told you he wasn't buying it. “Okay, yeah, I ended up asking him for real,” you admitted, fidgeting with your bracelet. 

“Are you sure it's a good idea?” the boy asked and you felt a little bit better when you realized there was no judgment in his question, it was more like he was concerned. So you nodded, smiling. 

“He's a great teacher and he's careful with me, plus I really do enjoy spending time with him even without that so it's pretty much a win-win situation,” you reassured, yet Hyuck seemed like he had something else in mind. 

“Well, I hope you're right,” he said simply. “Such arrangements don't usually end well.” 

But before you could ask for clarification, you saw Jaemin appear from the corner of the corridor as if he had heard you talking. In a blink, the serious expression on Hyuck's face was gone, replaced with a grin. 

“Hey, lover boy,” he greeted the slightly younger boy and Jaemin slowed down in his steps, glancing at you. 

“You told him...?” he asked in confusion.

“Tell me what?” Hyuck faked surprise, raising his eyebrows. “Something going on between you two aside from those English lessons?”

“He figured it out,” you sighed, smacking Donghyuck on the arm lightly. “I told you, I was on the phone with him when I was trying to remember things from the party. Unfortunately.”

“You truly amaze me,” Donghyuck laughed, patting Jaemin on the back. “I don't know what's funnier, the fact that your excuse for the others was English lessons or the fact that they bought it.”

“Don't jinx it,” you rolled your eyes. “And please don't tell them. I'd prefer Renjun not to know about this. And Karina… well, she’s my best friend, I'll tell her myself at some point.”

You were relieved when he nodded in agreement. You were startled by his arm suddenly wrapping around your shoulders and you looked to the side to find him grinning at you. 

“You know, Y/N, I’ve heard rumors that Jaemin never sleeps with the same girl twice,” Hyuck whispered way too loudly. “Can you imagine? High school heartthrob, the most wanted boy that no one can truly have, is breaking his principles for you, Y/N,” he said dramatically and you rolled your eyes.

“Shut up, Hyuck, the two are completely different,” Jaemin scoffed and you could hear the cutting annoyance in his tone. 

“I also heard,” Hyuck ignored him, widening his eyes for the sake of being dramatic. “That he’s not had a hook-up in a while now. Hmmm, maybe since around the beginning of the new school year. Why could that be?”

“Stop rambling nonsense,” Jaemin snapped, hitting him on the back of the head and Donghyuck laughed cheerfully, running away before Jaemin had the chance to use any more violence. 

He didn’t miss the chance to send you a dramatic wink though before he was out of sight. As Jaemin walked you to your next class in comfortable silence, you couldn’t help but wonder why Donghyuck had mentioned both of those ‘rumors’. And the thought haunted you for a while after as well.

~

It wasn’t one of your best days, you could admit that. You had overslept and arrived late for school, mid-class realized you had forgotten both your history books (which meant that the teacher wouldn’t let you stay in class unless you could find someone to borrow from and, unlucky you, you couldn’t) and your lunch (which wasn’t as bad but still upsetting). On top of that, your mom had texted you that both she and your dad wouldn’t make it home today due to work. You were upset and slightly stressed out and your mind couldn’t focus on anything. So instead of going home once classes ended, you hid in the library. 

“Oh, thank you, I wouldn’t have thought to check here,” a familiar voice said and you lifted your head from the table to see a familiar head. The librarian walked away as Jaemin took a book from one of the shelves and turned around. His eyes stopped on you and he raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Oh, Y/N, what are you doing here?”

“Oh, you know, soaking up some of the smart vibes,” you tried to joke, but you failed to make it sound humorous. 

Jaemin seemed to catch on quickly that you weren’t your usual self and he made his way over to you, taking the seat across from yours. 

“What’s wrong, princess?” he asked, eyebrows furrowing with concern. 

“Oh, nothing really, just having an off day,” you reassured, managing a smile. 

To be honest, seeing him lifted your mood. How hadn’t you thought about reaching out to him before for company? With your different class schedules, you often had a hard time seeing your friends at school, sometimes even during the lunch break you couldn’t all be together and it had slipped your mind that the other four of your friend group were actually in the same building as you.

“Wanna talk about it?” he asked carefully and didn't push when you shook your head no. “Alright then, is there anything I can do to make it better?” 

“Already did, Jaem,” you smiled, reaching over to ruffle his hair and he chuckled. “I don't know why I didn't think of texting you for company or something.”

“Oh, that could happen,” he waved his hand. “I'm here now. Although I must admit, the school library is not my location of choice.”

“Well, if you want you can come over,” you offered. “My parents won't be home today so I would appreciate some company.” You couldn't help the bitterness in your tone.

The look on his face showed you that he understood what you weren't telling him - how much their absence affected you, how much you hated being alone in your home. Yet he didn't say anything about it, instead just smiled and agreed. 

About 20 minutes and a bus ride later, the two of you walked into your house. The big empty space and the thought that there wouldn't be anyone else in here tonight overwhelmed you and you didn't feel like using the common rooms so you led the way to your bedroom. 

“You know, I've been thinking about redecorating here,” you said, humming to yourself as you looked around. “Wanna help me?” you turned to him, smiling with sudden excitement. 

“Sure,” he grinned. “What’cha thinking of doing?”

“Hmmm, I think it's time I take off some of those posters over there,” you pointed, “and I have a box of photos that I wanna put up but was always too lazy to do that.”

As you spoke, you walked over to your desk and pulled out the box in question. You shuffled through the things inside it - photos of you and your friends at random places and times plus a few with your parents - and were surprised to find an unopened pack of glow-in-the-dark stars. You had also wanted to put some of those on your walls but the thought had slipped your mind and now, looking at them, a smile curved your lips. Jaemin leaned over your shoulder, surprising you as you had not realized he was behind you, and chuckled. 

“Sounds great, let's do it.”

Taking off the old things was easy, although a bit annoying. The real challenge came when it was time to put up the new stuff. The photos had a designated space on a corkboard that the two of you put up easily, but the arrangement seemed to be a living hell. No matter what you tried, you weren't satisfied. 

“Maybe if you put Karina and Hyuck over here and below them the photo with me?” Jaemin was doing his best to help you, holding up the pins whenever you tried some new configuration. You hummed and tried what he had offered. “I think it looks nice.”

“Yes, but what about this one? It's from the same day as Karina and Hyuck but it doesn't work well in the space that's left,” you huffed, pouting. If only you weren't such a perfectionist at the most random of times…

“Well you could put it across and use them as some sort of frame?” he offered and you followed through, observing the way it looked like that. 

“Yeah, that can work,” you thought about it for a moment, taking a few other photos and filling up the space. Then rearranged some of them. Then once again rearranged them. Finally, things were starting to look satisfying enough. 

Little by little, with small suggestions from Jaemin and a lot of rearranging, you were pleased with what you had accomplished. The faces of your favorite people were looking back at you, smiling as if congratulating you for a job well done. A smile grew on your face as well. 

The next step was putting up the stars. And yes, it was just as hard. You wanted them to make up actual constellations which meant that you had like ten tabs open on your phone as you guided Jaemin on where to put each star. Putting up your star sign's constellation had been the first step, followed by the dragon, which took way too much time, and by the end, you were feeling bad about making Jaemin do all this with you, but he reassured you with a bright smile that he didn't mind. 

“Put that big one as Sirius,” you pointed, currently making the big dog. You had just finished up with Orion. 

“You'll have to be a little more precise, what the fuck is Sirius?” Jaemin laughed awkwardly, looking at you in confusion.

“The brightest star visible in our sky,” you rolled your eyes, chuckling. “And also part of the dog. Take, like, eight times Orion's belt following its line.”

“I know you live in a mansion but I don't think your wall is big enough for that, love,” he rolled his eyes and you huffed.

“Then just follow the line and put it somewhere,” you said, tone slightly bratty, but he obliged without protesting. “Now, put another one above it and to the left kinda, and then kinda make a triangle.”

“God, just show me what it should look like,” Jaemin sighed, turning to you. “This is so far the worst explanation you've given me.”

You exaggerated an exasperated groan and turned your screen towards him, letting him take in the image. Nodding to himself, he got back to work, sticking little glowing stars on your wall and the constellation slowly came to life.

“Alright, there are not enough stars for anything else so that should be all,” you checked the box while Jaemin got off the chair the two of you had set up instead of a ladder. 

“Thank all gods!” he sighed dramatically and you chuckled, walking over to him.

You weren't sure what took over you, yet the next thing you knew was that you were tiptoeing to press your lips, still curved in a small smile, on his in a gentle peck. When you pulled away, his eyebrows were raised in surprise.

“I just-” you started, biting your lips. “Thank you. For helping me and for keeping me company.”

“Of course, princess,” he smiled gently. “Anything you need, I am here to help.”

You bit your lips, thinking for a moment. You were so used to doing something sexual whenever the two of you got together and your mind was already drifting away in that direction. But you didn't want to ruin the pure and soft energy that the two of you had established for now. 

“Nana, can we cuddle?” you asked instead and he chuckled.

“I didn't know you still need to ask about that,” he teased, “given what else that we have done.”

“Yeah, but… it’s always nice to ask, y’know. Plus, I wanna sit in your lap or something like that,” you pouted.

Shaking his head slightly, Jaemin took your hand and pulled you to the bed, getting up on it and pulling you sideways in his lap. He looked at you as if for confirmation that that's what you had meant and you nodded, leaning your head on his shoulder and wrapping your arm around his waist. One of his arms wrapped around you to hold you closer and his fingers started drawing small figures on your side as his other hand rested on your knee. A small smile curved your lips. It was at times like this when you appreciated how clingy this boy was. It felt perfect, it felt safe. And it felt like home more than the empty house you were in.

For a while it was quiet. Your mind started drifting away and suddenly you remembered the things Donghyuck had said the other day. It wasn’t as much about why he hadn’t made this a one-time thing, instead what kept you thinking was the idea that he had stopped seeing other people. And even more so the fact that you were unexplainably pleased by that.

“Nana?” you said quietly and he hummed. "Have you really not been with anyone else since we started this lessons thing?” 

You felt his fingers stop moving and you looked up at him. He was looking at you, lips pressed together and an unreadable expression on his face. 

“Yeah,” he nodded in the end. “I thought that it would be unfair to you. Plus, I don’t really need to see anyone else.”

“But what we do here is not something official,” you pointed out, your chest clenching as the words left your lips. You weren't sure why. “You’ve never really been one to settle down. I never intended to stop you from hooking up with other people. Or even dating someone, if you have found someone.”

“You're not stopping me, princess,” he said, sighing as he rubbed your back gently. “I am not interested in anyone else at the moment, that's the reason. And you're doing quite well in satisfying my needs, so why would I be?”

He chuckled slightly at the end and smiled at you as if trying to reassure you that you had nothing to worry about. Yet his smile didn't reach his eyes and you couldn't help but worry that he was hiding something from you.

“Do you… ever feel like I'm just using you?” you asked, biting your lips. This had been something you worried about for a while actually - sure, he only seemed uncomfortable the first time, but what if he just didn't want to hurt you by backing out after he had already agreed? 

“Love, what's with these questions all of a sudden?” he raised his eyebrows, taking your chin between his fingers and lifting your head slightly to make sure you were looking at him. “Of course you're not ‘just using’ me. I agreed to it and, trust me, I enjoy every moment of it. If you're anxious because I wait for you to initiate things, we agreed on that at the beginning and it’s for you to feel comfortable, right?” 

You nodded slightly, a small pout curving your lips. It seemed like he wasn't sure whether you believed him or not, so he hummed and leaned closer, pecking your lips softly. You blinked in surprise. 

“Is this enough to convince you that I am happy with the way things are or would you need me to fuck you to prove it?” he grinned and you rolled your eyes. You were well aware it was just a joke yet your body seemed to react to the suggestion as you felt yourself heating up. 

“I don't-” you started, but you weren't sure what you wanted to say. As much as the idea of having sex with Jaemin seemed appealing, you didn't feel that the time was right. But then again, it did seem appealing… and he had offered…

“What are you thinking about, princess?” he asked, his voice so close to your ear that it startled you. “You can be honest with me.” 

“I'm not… ready to go all the way,” you admitted. “But now thanks to you I'm also needy.” You childishly whined out that one, rolling your eyes. 

“My offer still stands,” he said with a small smirk on his lips as his fingers on your knee started gently moving up and down your skin. “All you have to do is ask if you want me to take care of that for you.”

“Since when are you into teasing?” you scoffed, looking away as you couldn't stand looking at the knowing curve of his lips and his eyes looking at you intensely. 

“I've always been like this, you know,” he responded, tilting his head to the side. “And just because I haven't commented on it, doesn't mean I don't notice the way you move uncomfortably when you try to hide how turned on you are. You look adorable, by the way, the way you squirm around and get all shy without even realizing it. Makes me want to ravish you every time.”

“Oh my god, Jaemin, shut up!” you whined out. You'd be lying though if you said his words didn't affect you. You couldn't help but feel embarrassed that he had seen through you that easily. Yet the fact that he claimed to get turned on by that made the heat between your legs spread. So you took his hand on your knee, moved it up to your thigh, and after a deep breath said: “If you really mean that, now's your time to shine.” 

A soft laugh left his lips but he didn't wait for a second invitation to let his hand slip under your uniform skirt along your sensitive skin. 

“Should I take revenge for all the teasing you put me through and edge you on until you're begging me to finally make you come?” he asked, voice low as his thumb brushed against your clothed clit, making your thighs twitch. 

“I never meant to tease you!” you defended yourself, although if you had to be honest, you did enjoy it a lot of the time. 

“I know, princess,” he assured you, despite the knowing smirk on his lips. “And since you've been such a diligent student… you deserve a little reward.”

And true to his word, he carefully pushed your panties to the side and one of his fingers moved up your slit, drawing a whimper out of you. His thumb pressed against your clit and rubbed carefully and you let your head fall back on his shoulder. 

There was something different about Jaemin at the moment. Yes, he'd always been confident and even though you were usually the one in control, that didn't change. But this time his energy was different - he was dominating the situation with nothing more than a couple of soft touches. 

One of his fingers started pushing inside you slowly and you bit your lips to hold back a whimper. His free hand moved to your head and gently stroked your hair as he started pumping his finger in and out carefully. Occasionally, his thumb would rub over your clit. And as good as it felt… it was nowhere near enough.

“Jaemin, please,” you pleaded quietly. “You said you wouldn’t tease.”

“I’m just making the most of my time,” he chuckled. “You’re just too soft and wet, princess, I’m sorry.” You wined out and he smiled a little wider. “Give me a kiss and I’ll think about it.”

“I’m starting to think you really meant that part about the begging,” you muttered as you hooked your fingers in his shirt and tugged him closer to press your lips against his.

“Don’t mind if you do,” he whispered against your lips when you pulled away, the corner of his mouth tugging upwards.

Yet he didn’t wait for you to say anything else. His movements sped up almost immediately after a second finger made its way inside you. This time you couldn’t fight your moan as a shiver ran down your spine. Jaemin’s fingers worked quickly inside you, spreading you out and curling, pressing against your walls until he found that spot that made you shake with pleasure. And then it was like a whole new world opened its doors for you.

Jaemin pressed his lips gently against your neck, kissing along your skin. You could feel how careful he was to not spend too much time on any one spot in case your skin bruised and it saddened you a bit, but fuck, it still felt so good. Then he moved up your throat to a spot below your ear. That’s where he started sucking on your skin harder. All the while, his fingers kept up their sweet torture, making your body twist in his hold as moans fell from your lips one after another.

“That’s my good girl,” Jaemin whispered against your ear and you whimpered. “I’ve imagined this so many times, you know? How receptive you’d be, how loud you’d get when I’m touching you. I’d also love to know how you taste, to see what you look like when you cum. Will you show me, princess?”

“Nana, please,” you whimpered again and the sharp exhale that you felt against your skin reminded you that he seemed to have a thing for begging. “I’m close, please, don’t stop.”

“As long as you promise to moan as loud as you can for me, princess,” he said with a low tone, his hot breath hitting your sensitive skin. “Tell me how good I’m making you feel, let me hear you.”

And who were you to say no, really? Not with the way his fingers were moving, not with the way his thumb was pressing against your clit, and definitely not with the way he was making you see stars. Every moan you let out seemed to make him even more determined until finally you couldn’t take it anymore and came with a whine of his name.

When you opened your eyes again, Jaemin was looking at you with the softest star-struck expression you’d ever seen. Your heart skipped a beat at the warmth in his eyes.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said softly and you felt bubbling in your chest. If you weren’t in a daze from your orgasm, you’d probably think about that. But you didn’t. 

“And you’re hard,” you chuckled instead and earned yourself an eye-roll in response. 

“I believe I have a pretty valid reason for that, while you didn’t have one for completely ignoring my compliment.”

“No, listen,” you hummed and pecked his cheek. “Thank you. But I just thought that it would be unfair to just leave you like this. I should return the favor, no?”

“Not this time, love,” he shook his head. “I’ll be okay. I’d prefer to just stay like this for a little longer.”

~

taglist: @multihoe-net @jaeymark @bythe8 @jaemboi64 @okokoksblog @paintandwine @fairypothos @sweetjaemss @magnificentjudgemoneyhands @jsjcue @sunshinedhyuck @luvdroids @wanlore @marklexleaf @back2jisung @taehyungmami @the-midnight-arthouse @multifandombtvh @chichhihaa @nctevia @thiccfullsun @hwanunjin @dinochocochip @keemburley @jaemints

[jaemanon]

Like The Stars Pt. 1

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4

Pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, sex lessons au, friends to lovers

Word Count: ~8,8k

Includes: high school seniors (everyone is legal of age); canon bisexual mc; side characters donghyuck, renjun, and karina; profanities; obviously, sex lessons; kind of a slow burn?; mc being oblivious and kind of innocent but hopefully not in an annoying way; one handjob (for now)

Summary: you'd had a crush on renjun for as long as you could remember, but your lack of experience always stopped you from taking the first step; it's a good thing you have your trusted friend jaemin to help you out

Author's note: fun fact about this story, i've been writing it ever since ridin came out... i edited it a bit to make that less obvious, but i apologize for any writing inconsistencies that may appear, as there is only so much i can change without rewriting the full thing also if you see any mentions of hair colors, no you didn't also i meant to post this as one part but i wasn't able to finish it by the day i wanted to post it so imma stop procrastinating and finish it on the go hehe

It was something like an unwritten rule that rich kids would go to private schools, at least where you lived, which could also be heavily influenced by the fact that one of the best private schools in the country was located in your town. Of course, coming from a family of successful businessmen, you had been enrolled the moment your family stepped foot there three years ago. About 95% of the students were filthy rich, the remaining 5% being scholarship kids that you didn’t really communicate with much. Well, truth be told, you only really communicated with four people in the school but in all honesty, you enjoyed your school life.

You walked into the school cafeteria and headed over to the table where your best friend Karina was already enjoying her lunch. Across from her was sitting Donghyuck, another one of your friends. Karina and Hyuck had a long story back, both of them teasing each other all the time, never actually getting together yet for some reason. You had given up trying to help them. You had enough to worry about with your own secret crush anyway.

“The school year started two weeks ago, how come I already have three different assignments,” you complained instead of a greeting once you sat down at the table.

“Senior year, Y/N, we all knew that was coming,” Hyuck shrugged, grinning slightly with an astonishing lack of empathy.

You just rolled your eyes, not bothering to respond. You took a bite out of your lunch but got distracted as soon as two familiar figures entered the cafeteria. The other two in your small group – Na Jaemin and Huang Renjun. Your eyes quickly stopped on the Chinese boy and you couldn't help but let out a quiet sigh.

“Y/N, dear, can you please tell him finally?” Karina rolled her eyes next to you, leaning closer and lowering her voice so Hyuck wouldn't listen in. “You’ve had a crush on Renjun for as long as I’ve known you, you should just go for it.” 

You shook your head quickly, opening your mouth to say something in objection but then the two boys had already reached the table. You closed your mouth again and waved at them with a smile.

“Hello there,” Jaemin greeted, grinning slightly as he sat on the table next to you. Like, literally on the table, his feet stepping on the bench. You looked up at him, eyebrows raised in just a slightly judging manner.

“Hey, kiddo,” you smiled back, reaching up to ruffle his hair.

Yet your smile melted as Renjun suddenly sat down next to you, greeting you with a soft “Hello, beautiful” of his own and throwing his arm over your shoulder. You greeted back softly, enjoying the feeling of his body near yours.

Renjun confused you a lot of the time - he seemed open to you, he flirted and complimented you a lot, but he’d never really addressed any feelings and you knew him as a straightforward guy that wouldn’t just keep quiet if he wanted something. Which is why you were scared to ask him yourself. That, and your lack of experience. Well, you weren’t innocent and pure, you had dated and had sex before, but it had been with girls. Men were a confusing thing to you, you weren't sure what to do with those and feared messing up, as dumb as that was. But you just didn’t want to mess up with Renjun.

“People, I am planning on organizing a back-to-school party this year,” Jaemin said, pulling you away from your thoughts. 

“Are parties all you think about?” Renjun tsked in disapproval on your left, making you chuckle. “You’re legally an adult already, Nana, you can’t always just have fun.”

“So, who wants to host it?” Jaemin ignored him, a grin spreading on his lips. “My parents are home tonight so it can’t be at my place. Hyuckie?” Donghyuck shook his head with a roll of his eyes. 

“Don’t look at me,” he whined. “Last time I let you have a party at my place, I had to find my precious Michael Jackson albums in the bottom of the laundry basket, under at least three shirts that weren’t mine!”

The grin on Jaemin’s lips didn’t fall, instead, he just seemed pleased with the mentioned outcome.

“My parents aren’t home, actually,” you mentioned, chuckling slightly. “And you’re in luck, I actually feel like dealing with one of your parties, Jaem,” you said, smiling at the boy that immediately turned to you, a happy glow in his eyes that melted you a bit on the inside.

“Great then, I’ll go invite everyone important!” he jumped up, already taking out his phone and ignoring Renjun’s eye roll and disappointed sigh.

“Y/N, you should finish your lunch,” Renjun said to you, smiling sweetly. “If you’ll be dealing with him all night, you’ll need all your energy.” You nodded slightly as you took a big bite of your meal, eyes shining from the approval on Renjun’s face.

You failed to notice Jaemin’s mood faltering and the way his smile dropped as he left the cafeteria. And when you realized he had left, you just shrugged, assuming it was just to talk to his friends about the party.

The school day passed by quickly, and soon you found yourself at home getting everything ready for the party. The home staff had helped you stock up enough alcohol and snacks for as many people as you could, not really sure who Jaemin would even have invited. You hoped it wouldn’t be the whole school, which he had done once in Renjun’s house. You were relieved to see not that many people arriving. I mean, of course, it was a pretty big party, but you could handle this much and still have a house by the next day.

The night was going well, everyone seemed to be having fun, a lot of the kids were already getting drunk, and you were pretty sure at least one of the guest rooms was taken up, but you were happy. And maybe a little tipsy yourself.

“Y/N, baby, come play with us,” you heard your best friend’s voice call out to you and turned around with a smile, seeing Karina, the three boys, and some other kids. You approached curiously, taking a sip from your glass filled with vodka and cranberry juice.

“What are we playing?” you asked, tilting your head to the side.

“Truth or dare,” Hyuck answered instead, grinning. You took notice of the boy sitting a lot closer to Karina than usual, which made you raise your eyebrows and a smirk curve your lips, throwing the other girl an amused glance to which she replied with a wink.

“I’m in,” you giggled, sitting down in the free spot next to Renjun and across from Jaemin. They had already started playing and apparently, one of the girls had to sit in another guy’s lap, which he seemed to enjoy a lot more than her. The same boy spun the bottle and it landed on you, another giggle escaping you. Okay, maybe you were more than just a little tipsy.

“Uh, if you had to date someone from the group, who would it be?” the boy asked awkwardly, which you gave to the fact that you didn’t really know each other.

“Easy, Karina” you grinned, laughing a bit after that, though judging by his expression he expected the answer to be a boy. “But if you insist it has to be with a dick, then I’d say Renjun,” you added, your mind cloudy enough to not overthink it. Renjun laughed amused, leaning over to peck your cheek, and if anyone could know that you were suddenly feeling warmer, you'd blame it on the alcohol.

As the game goes, it was your turn to spin the bottle and so you did, landing on a girl from the class below yours. You knew her very vaguely yet made up some dumb dare that the girl still ended up enjoying. A few more rounds went by and the bottle fell on Jaemin, who picked dare almost the same second.

“Kiss the person across from you,” whoever had spun said.

It took you a moment to realize that was you. You blinked, looking up and your eyes met. Unlike the confident expression you could see on his face usually, Jaemin looked unsure, you could see a question in his eyes. “I can drink if you don’t-“ he started, but you shook your head.

“Na Jaemin doesn’t step down from dares,” you declared, giggling and taking a sip from your drink again. “I ain’t gonna be the reason you change that.” With that you got up on your knees, leaning over the bottle closer to him.

You could see him still hesitating, which made you narrow your eyebrows slightly and pout. “If you don’t want to, though…“ you started, your tone a bit upset in your drunken haze, which seemed to snap him out of his anxiousness and he moved up, closer to you. His hand reached up, cupping your cheek gently.

“Any preferences on the kiss?” he asked suddenly, you weren't sure if he was asking you or the person that had given the dare. 

“Aye, don’t be boring, give us a show,” someone shouted from the side and your eyes widened a bit as you realized that maybe you hadn’t really thought this through.

You hadn’t kissed boys, although you supposed it wouldn’t be much different from kissing girls. But you had never expected the first boy you kissed would be Jaemin, one of your closest friends. Yet you didn’t mind, or at least the alcohol in your system helped you not to mind. 

“You better make my first kiss with a boy worth it, Na” you mumbled jokingly and then leaned closer, pressing your lips against his softly.

He seemed taken aback for a second, yet reacted almost immediately after that, kissing back and tilting his head to the side to deepen the kiss. His hand moved from your cheek to the back of your neck as he seemed to pull you closer. His tongue gently darted along your lips and you gladly opened them, letting him do whatever he pleased, the alcohol on his tongue mixing with the taste of vodka in your own mouth. You could hear cheers around you, and you could hear your brain complaining about what Renjun would think of you, but Jaemin was very distracting from both of those. Apparently, people weren’t lying when they said he was skilled with that stuff.

When he finally pulled away, you could feel your head spinning a bit, the oxygen a little short for your already intoxicated brain and you stumbled a bit as you sat back down. Renjun wrapped his arms around you quickly to help you so you wouldn’t fall. You thanked him softly, smiling at Jaemin. The other boy had already sat back down as well, seemingly calm, although his eyes were moving around anxiously. ‘Was I a bad kiss?’ was the first thought in your head, making you widen your eyes slightly. And being the dysfunctional drunk you were, the thought stuck with you for the rest of the game. You answered some questions, did some dares but didn’t even give them thought. Your mind was entirely somewhere else. All you could think about was that you had been so bad Jaemin regretted it... and that you wouldn’t be good enough for Renjun.

Caught up in your thoughts, you didn’t notice it had been your turn to spin the bottle until Renjun shook you gently. You blinked, eyes focusing on him and widening slightly when you realized how close he was. Your head was spinning and suddenly you felt the urge to kiss him. 

“Sorry, someone take my turn,” you coughed out, getting up and walking away quickly as panic flooded your mind.

You headed straight for your room, closing the door behind you and leaning your back on the wall. You could feel tears rushing to your eyes so you took a large sip of your drink to distract yourself. It was going to be okay, you thought, you'd sober up and it would get better. This was a dumb reason to cry anyway.

“You okay, princess?” you heard a familiar voice suddenly. Not expecting him to be there, you jumped up slightly, looking over at Jaemin. “Sorry, I just got worried when you left so quickly and wanted to check if everything is alright.”

“Was I a bad kiss?” you asked, not really paying attention to what he had said. You could only focus on one thing at the moment.

“I’m sorry, what?“ Jaemin widened his eyes, choking slightly on air.

“Did it feel bad? Kissing me, I mean,” you reworded your question, your lips trembling a little.

“Of course not!” he shot back immediately, his face heating up noticeably. “You were one of the best kisses I’ve ever had,” he added a little more collected this time as he looked away and coughed awkwardly. You weren't sure if he was honest or just saying that to calm you down but decided not to question it for your own sake. You pouted and looked at your drink.

“Good enough for Renjun?” you asked quietly instead. You hadn’t mentioned your crush in front of the boys in your friend group because you were scared they would spread the information just because they were friends, yet at the moment that wasn’t your biggest concern. Jaemin didn’t reply though. When you looked up, his face was blank. “I’m sorry, that was a dumb question, ignore it,” you forced a laugh and took a sip from your drink as if to say ‘Look, everything’s so alright I can even drink!’

“You haven’t confessed to him yet because you’re scared you wouldn’t be good enough at kissing?” Jaemin asked, raising his eyebrow as his usual teasing grin slowly took back its place on his lips.

“Well, not just a kiss, I,“ you started explaining, then a gasp left your lips and your eyes widened. “You know?!” you screeched and covered your face with your hands.

“It’s just a little obvious,” Jaemin replied jokingly as he stepped closer to you and pulled your hands away from your face, taking the glass away from you and setting it down on the shelf near you. He’d closed the door after he’d walked in, leaving the two of you alone in your bedroom. “Now tell me, what did you mean?”

“Well, I’m scared I’ll be a disappointment,” you signed, leaning back against the wall and crossing your arms. “I’ve been with girls before. But I’ve never been with a boy, I’m scared I’ll mess up when I’m with him and he won’t want to be with me but won’t tell me because he’s just too sweet and we’ll be stuck in a relationship he doesn’t want and I can’t let go.” You were ranting at this point, the alcohol blurring your thoughts.

“You know he wouldn’t judge you for something like this,” Jaemin said quietly, one of his hands gently cupping your cheek, which made you remember the kiss earlier when he had held you the same way. “And I’m sure you’d figure out what to do quickly anyways” he added, a small smile curving his lips as if to comfort you. You were quiet for a bit, your mind once again working on its own thing.

“I know! You’ll teach me!” you exclaimed suddenly, grabbing his arms excitedly. In your eyes, there was a glimmer and Jaemin had to take a step back. 

“What?!“ he choked out, and you giggled, finding his surprise adorable. 

“Teach me how to please a boy, Nana,” you asked, a grin spreading your lips at the brilliant idea you had just had.

“I think you should stop drinking and just go to bed, Y/N,” the boy chuckled awkwardly, pushing you away from himself. He pulled you gently to the big bed in the corner of the room.

You narrowed your eyebrows - going to sleep wasn’t what you had wanted. So when the two of you reached the bed, you pushed Jaemin to sit on it instead, surprising him enough so he couldn’t stop you, and got in his lap. Your arms came to rest on his shoulders and you looked down at his wide eyes and flustered expression.

“I’m serious, Jaemin, you have experience with these things and I trust you.” You could see him swallowing hard, hopefully, that was supposed to mean that he was giving in. “Teach me how to fuck boys, Jaem” you whispered, begging him with your eyes.

He was still unresponsive. And if you had been sober, you probably would have apologized already and stepped away. But you weren't. So instead of that, you let your head drop until your lips could press comfortably against the skin of his neck and you started leaving open-mouthed kisses down his neck. Then you decided to go back on the same path, this time sucking and nibbling gently along the way. If the way he swallowed dryly and let out a shaky breath was any indication, your actions seemed to be doing the trick and a pleased smile curved your lips. Getting bolder as he didn’t seem to want to stop you anymore, you took it further, lips attaching to a spot you liked and sucking harshly, aiming to leave a mark. At the same time, you rolled your hips against his.

“Fuck-“ Jaemin moaned out lowly at the action, and his hips bucked up slightly against you.

And then you felt a bulge in his pants, pressing against your thigh. You thought that would mean you had won, yet suddenly he pushed you away, startling you enough to make you take a step back and off his lap. His eyes were blown wide as he looked at you, his breathing - heavy.

“Love, believe me, I would love nothing more than to push you onto this bed and have you scream my name,” he said. For some reason, the pet name sent tingles down your spine. Or it could have been the things he’d said. Or the low, raspy tone of voice that you had never heard before. You blamed it on the alcohol.

“Then why haven’t you yet?” you asked, attempting to sound seductive, yet it came out as more of a whine. “What do you want me to do, Nana? Beg for you? Beg for your dick? I can do that, I will do whatever you want me to do.” 

Your eyes were tearing up a little bit at this point. You were drunk and you were now horny, and Jaemin was like a ray of light, a promise of a good time. He had just said that he wanted to do this too. So why was he still refusing?

“Y/N, you are literally wasted,” he said, his eyes softening as he stood up from the bed and approached you again. His hands cupped your cheeks, squishing them slightly and you narrowed your eyebrows. “I am not going to do anything with you in such a state.” He must have seen the disappointment on your face though, as he let out a soft sigh and pecked your lips gently, surprising you. “Listen, if when you wake up tomorrow, you still remember this and you still want me to… teach you, we’ll talk about this more, okay?”

You wanted to argue, to insist on it being right then and there. But you knew that he wouldn’t step down. And deep down, you were grateful about it. And maybe your eyes were stinging a lot more than they did a minute ago, and the bed seemed awfully inviting now.

“But what about you though?” you asked quietly, looking away from him. It wasn't until you looked back at him due to his lack of response, that you realized he didn’t understand your question. “Well, I made you… hard...?” you said, almost a question. 

A chuckle left Jaemin’s lips and he shook his head a little as he pulled you to the bed, letting you lay down and carefully tucking you under the covers. His fingers got buried in your hair and he gently hummed. You were drifting away faster than you had expected. By the time his quiet reply came, you were already too gone to make out the words. 

~

The pain in your head was a bitch. There wasn’t a single thought in your mind besides “fucking hell” for the first few hours after you'd woken up, thankful that Jaemin had been smart enough to throw his party on a Friday, so you could sleep in and die in peace. You didn’t remember getting in bed, but you didn’t really bother about it. It was your own house, you had probably gotten tired and had gone to sleep, in your room, as normal as that.

With a quiet groan, you got up, first heading into the bathroom for your usual morning routine, as well as to take a shower - you felt as if the smell of alcohol had soaked up in your bones. After that, you went to the medicine cabinet in the kitchen. There wasn’t much, but you managed to find a pack of painkillers and gladly took two. You could only hope they would work soon.

Finally feeling a bit more conscious, you decided breakfast would be nice. Obviously, you weren't in the mood to prepare anything complicated, so you just put two slices of bread in the toaster. While waiting for them to be done, you finally checked your phone. Usually, it would be the first thing you do when you wake up, but today you hadn’t had the power to. First of all, you decided to check your messages - there were some from all of your friends from last night.

“you okay?"; "nana said you went to sleep”; “kinda weird if u ask me”; “did you really fall asleep at your own party-” had asked Karina. A chuckle escaped your lips. You quickly typed back an apology, assuring her that you were okay before you opened Hyuck’s message. The smile on your face quickly dropped after you read that one, confusion taking over you.

“girl, if u thought no one would notice the giant hickey on jaemins neck-“ That was the first one. There was another one that made your pulse speed up. “fucker was looking too smug when he came back from ur room did u like suck him off or smth???”

Still unsure what he meant, you opened Renjun’s message. “Jaemin told us that you’d had too much to drink and needed rest. I hope you feel okay in the morning. Make sure to drink lots of water”. After that, there was another short one “Text me if you need anything” followed by a smiley emoji and a heart, which made you melt on the inside a little.

You were more than confused though, your brain was working at its maximum capacity in a hangover state as you moved your toast to a plate, together with some fruit, and then returned to your room to eat there. Munching on a piece of bread, you tried to remember what had happened last night. Finally, you decided that this called for drastic measures.

“Aye, thought you might have died,” were Donghyuck’s first words when he picked up the phone, his voice the usual childish tone over the speaker, a grin evident even in the way he spoke. “Am still waiting for an answer, what did you do to the poor boy?”

“That’s the thing, Hyuck, I don’t remember doing anything,” you sighed, rolling your eyes as you already regretted calling him. “I don’t really remember even being with him, honestly, I must have completely blacked out after… uh, say, did we play something last night...?” you asked, narrowing your eyebrows and nervously nibbling on your nail as you vaguely remembered sitting in a circle with a lot of other people.

“Yeah, truth or dare,” the boy responded, chuckling. “You don’t remember?” You didn’t respond for a while, which the boy seemed to take as a confirmation. “Well, uh…”

“Donghyuck...?” you asked carefully after a moment of silence. “Did I do something really weird?” Still no response. It was unusual for him to be so quiet and you were starting to get very nervous.

“I mean aside from telling everyone that you’d date Renjun and making out with Jaemin, I don’t think there’s anything you could worry about,” he said finally, his voice the normal lazy tone he had as if he hadn’t just told you what he had just told you.

“WHAT???” you screeched, hearing him whine on the other side that you had broken his ears. “Please tell me that you’re messing with me, please, Hyuckie,” you whimpered.

“Nah, you straight up had your tongue down Jaemin’s throat as if your life depended on it. Like, technically you asked for it. It was his dare and he was going to drink but you insisted quite passionately,” he replied casually as if that was the most normal thing ever. “And the Renjun thing wasn’t even that serious, I mean I doubt anyone took it that seriously.” He at least had the decency to try to sound reassuring.

You needed a moment to take it all in. Your fingers got buried in your hair, tugging on it in shock. “Do you think he caught on? He’s smart enough, he probably understood what it meant…“ you whispered, not even minding that Donghyuck seemed to be quite aware of your feelings for Renjun. “I don’t even wanna know what he thought of me - saying that and then kissing… kissing Jaemin,“ you choked on the last words, the thought was so foreign to you.

“It really wasn’t that serious, it was a dare and we had all drank quite a lot, he’d be an idiot to think any less of you for it. But maybe your drunk self was worried too, y’know, you were staring at him for a while there before you suddenly ran away to your room,” the boy on the other side said, humming. His tone seemed a bit more serious now as if he had caught onto your distress even though he was still joking about it.

You pushed your brain more, trying to find the pieces in your mind now that you knew what you were looking for. You could remember the feeling of soft lips on yours, even though the face was not there. “What happened after that? Do you know?”

“All I know is that Jaemin went after you.” You let out a hum, still trying to think. “He came back down about 20 minutes later with a giant dark bruise on his neck. He looked very distracted also, like, he seemed to be thinking about something, fidgeting around all the time and-“

Before he could finish his sentence, you let out another loud screech. It had finally clicked. Not all of it was there, but enough had returned to you and you wanted to die. To bury yourself alive and not ever appear in the land of living again.

“If you’ll repay me for my help by making me permanently deaf, I will just hang up,” Hyuck whined, but you couldn’t care less. You were horrified by your own actions.

“Donghyuck, I asked Jaemin to teach me how to have sex.”

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

“You did what-“ it was a mix between a choke and a laugh as if Donghyuck was in disbelief. Understandably so. This was something quite out of your character. “Sweetie, correct me if I’m wrong, but weren’t you crushing on Renjun for, like, the past couple of years?”

“I asked Jaemin cause I was scared I’d fuck up with Renjun, I’m… Hyuckie, what do I do?” you cried out, your head falling on your desk, but you barely noticed the pain in your forehead. “Hyuckie, I literally begged him and threw myself on him.” It was quiet on the other side of the line for a while and when Donghyuck spoke again, amusement laced his tone, as if he was a second away from bursting out laughing.

“Well, well, now it all makes sense…” You were just going to ask what he meant, when he continued, his tone turning suddenly more serious than you ever remembered hearing him. “I would suggest you think very carefully about this and call him and talk to him about the situation.”

“I- I mean, of course, but… Am I missing something else here?” you asked, lifting your head and narrowing your eyebrows in confusion.

“No, Y/N, just be careful. I gotta go now, Karina’s waiting for me” he said, his tone finally lightening up again and you knew you'd have to ask your best friend about it later. 

“Bye,” you replied quickly, a second later the hang-up tone resonated around your room.

You picked up your phone again, nibbling on your lower lip as you reread Renjun’s message. What was he thinking of you now? He was an angel, he probably didn’t even think much of your behavior last night, brushing it off due to the alcohol you had consumed, just as Donghyuck had. But maybe he found it inappropriate. What if he had thought that you were innocent and sweet and now his opinion had been ruined forever? You figured that you didn’t dare ask and find out. So in the end, you sent him a short “Thank you” with a heart emoji, before sending Jaemin a text that you'd be at his place in 30 minutes.

~

Waiting at the door for Jaemin to open was nerve-wracking. You could feel your hands shaking and you were tempted to turn around and run away. Actually, that seemed like a great idea. You could call him from home, why had you even decided to meet up in person in the first place?

“Hey, princess,” his greeting startled you and ruined the chance of escaping, your wide eyes meeting his soft ones, a bright smile on his lips. He looked just like any other time you'd seen him as if nothing had happened. His hair was still messy, as if you had just woken him up, which would make sense on a Saturday morning after a party. He was wearing a large t-shirt and loose sweatpants and he looked so soft you wanted to squish him and put him in your pocket. The irony that this was the same boy you had begged to fuck you was not lost on you. “What’s up, why did you come?” he asked, once again pulling you out of your thoughts.

“I wanted to talk to you,” you squeaked out, embarrassed as to how little your voice sounded. Jaemin’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, yet he smiled even more, even though that seemed impossible, and led you inside and up to his room, taking a pack of chips and two cans of Fanta from the kitchen on your way up.

He opened one of the cans and handed it to you, before opening the other one for himself, and looked up at you. 

“What’s up? How are you feeling, by the way, any hangover difficulties?” he asked, his caring nature peaking. You had to take a breath, he was one of the sweetest people you had ever met, how did you get yourself in this situation with him… You shook your head slightly as a no, which was obviously a lie, but you didn’t wanna let yourself procrastinate.

“Nana, I am so sorry for everything I did last night,” you said quietly, not daring to meet his eyes, staring at the wall behind him instead as your fingers were fidgeting with the tab of your Fanta. Yet you still managed to catch the way his expression changed, the smile falling suddenly. It was almost painful.

“So you did remember after all?” he asked quietly, taking a sip of his drink and setting it on the bedside table. “How much do you remember, princess? And what are you apologizing for exactly?”

“I- I think I remember most of it, I remember how I asked you to…“ You couldn’t finish the sentence, so you took a sip of your drink instead, trying to calm your mind a bit. “I remember I also tried to force you into agreeing…” Unconsciously, your eyes fell on his neck as if searching for… there it was, a bright reddish spot, proudly peeking over the collar of his shirt and suddenly you felt a new wave of embarrassment flooding you. “I am so sorry, I shouldn’t have invaded your space like that without permission,” you shook your head, forcing your eyes away from the bruised skin. "Not that there’s really an excuse for that…"

Jaemin obviously noticed your stare, readjusting his shirt slightly so the collar would cover the hickey. His eyes were gentle as he looked at you while you spoke, his lips pressed in a line.

“It’s okay, Y/N,” he said and something in the way he said your name made your stomach twist uneasy - it didn’t sound like usual, he sounded strained. “I could tell you’re not really in control of yourself, so don’t worry, we can just forget about it, hm?”

You looked up at him, observing his face. You could try to forget about it, of course. But you knew you wouldn’t be able to. And maybe you didn’t remember much, but you were sure he had said… what did he say exactly? Something like ‘I would love to have you scream my name.’ And hadn’t he hinted that he might agree to help you? You took a deep breath, shooting the next sentence out before you could have the time to regret it.

“I still want you to teach me”

Jaemin froze, his eyes widening as he looked up at you as if a second head had just grown out of your neck. You held his gaze, despite your mind literally screaming in fear to run away. You cleared your throat slightly and licked your lips before speaking again.

“You said that if I still want it, we can talk about it, so… If you don’t want to do it, that’s fine, I completely understand, just say something, Nana,” you asked, hoping that you hadn’t just single-handedly ruined your whole friendship.

“Are you completely sure that you want me, specifically me, to teach you about sex?” the boy asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. His eyes were unreadable, you couldn’t tell whether he wanted to do it, or to say no, you couldn’t even guess what he might be thinking about which honestly terrified you, yet you still nodded.

“I trust you more than any other guy I know, aside from Renjun and Hyuck, but they are obviously not an option. I know that you have experience, it’s not gonna be a jump in the dark…” He was still looking at you with the same expression as if waiting for you to go on. “I don’t even know why I came up with that idea back then, but I know that if I will be having sex with a boy, I would really love it if you’re the first one.” You weren't sure if what you said made sense or if it gave out the right message to the boy, especially since he knew that you liked Renjun.

“I told you last night, and I still stand behind my words, Renjun wouldn’t judge you for something like this,” he pointed out, eyes boring into yours as if he’d manage to read your mind. “You don’t need to do this for him.”

“It’s not only for him, yeah, it may be part of the reason, but I just think it’s time I stopped being afraid of being intimate with a guy,” you tried to make your idea make sense to him. He still seemed doubtful, so you forced an awkward smile on your lips as you added almost jokingly: “And I mean, why would I wanna settle for someone else if I can have the hottest guy I know?”

Tickling his ego seemed to finally do the trick, Jaemin’s mouth curved slightly at the corners and his eyes finally softened.

“Well, if you put it that way…“ he said, laughing cheerfully and you were relieved. “Fine, if you’re sure about it, I will help you,” he agreed, his tone still serious, but now it was just to show he understood the importance of what he was agreeing to. “I’ll go with your speed and I will teach you what you ask me about, okay? If you say you want something, we will do it, but I will not be initiating anything.” You nodded, smiling at him in appreciation.

“Can we not tell the others about it though?” you asked carefully, biting your lips. “I mean, Hyuck knows about last night but… can we keep this just between ourselves?”

“I mean, sure,” he shrugged, taking a sip of his drink before he looked at you again and grinned. “We have a deal, princess, just hit me up when you want to-”

“What about right now?” you shot quickly before even realizing it and the surprise on his face was almost comical.

“Well, you sure go all in…” he chuckled, shaking his head. “What do you wanna know first that you’re so impatient about?”

You looked away again, suddenly embarrassed by how eager you were.

“Well, I don’t know, you could just fuck me, like how you said you wanted to last night,” you said, a smirk curving your lips as some sudden wave of confidence washed over you. But it seemed like Jaemin was either not embarrassed to admit that or was better prepared for you now.

“I mean, I would love to,” he chuckled, a cocky smirk on his lips in return. “But lesson number one - don’t fuck a guy who doesn’t have a condom around,” he chuckled, amused at your surprised expression. “Unless, of course, you are taking pills. Or want to risk it with kids.” You quickly shook your head as a no to both.

“Then… we can try something else?” you asked, biting your lips. He was looking at you expectantly and you remembered that he’d said he wouldn’t initiate anything. “Like… we could go on what we dropped off last night and, well, I could give you… a blowjob?”

“You sure?” he asked after a long moment and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

“My God, Nana, if I’m asking you to do it, it obviously means that I’m-”

“Fine then, come here” he interrupted you, something in his eyes flashing and you could feel a shiver run down your spine at his deeper tone. You stood in your spot, frozen for a few seconds and a devilish smirk curved his lips. "Having second thoughts already? You seemed pretty sure just now..." he teased and the subtle mockery in his voice seemed to be enough to get you back to your senses.

Setting the half-empty can on the bedside table, you stood up and made your way over to the boy who had put his arms behind himself and leaned back on them as he waited for you. You weren’t exactly sure whether you were supposed to try and seduce him so the way you plopped yourself on his lap wasn’t exactly graceful or sexy, but he didn’t seem to mind as one of his arms wrapped around your waist to support you.

“I think you should refrain from leaving more hickeys though if you don’t want anyone to know about this,” he chuckled softly and you nodded, although quite honestly the thought made you a bit sad.  You had indeed wanted to go ahead and mark him up some more. The thought was quickly pushed to the back of your mind though, in favor of focusing on what you were actually supposed to do.

The task seemed much more difficult now that you knew he wouldn’t stop you and that your mind wasn’t buzzing with too much alcohol.

“You’re supposed to guide me, you know,” you mumbled, wrapping your arms around his neck and another chuckle escaped his lips.

“You wanted to continue from where we stopped last night, I thought you would be okay on your own with that,” he retorted. “Okay, let’s set something straight first,” he licked his lips, his eyes falling on yours for a second before he looked back up to your eyes again. “Is kissing included in this deal? We established yesterday that you are good enough at it already, so there’s no reason to include that in the lessons if you don’t want to.”

You took a moment, considering his question. On one side, he was right and it wasn’t necessary. Plus, it would make the whole thing even more intimate than it already seemed to be. Yet you kind of… wanted to include that as well. And you would probably feel more comfortable if there was something you were already used to in this whole situation. So, finally, you nodded in confirmation.

Seems like that was all he needed as a second later he crashed his lips on yours. For a moment, you were startled by the sudden intensity, yet you kissed back right away, pressing closer to him as if on instinct. He didn’t give you much time, forcing his tongue in your mouth and taking control of you almost immediately. Your fingers pushed through his hair, tugging gently. The arm around your waist tightened its grip and pulled you closer, as his free hand moved to the back of your thigh, squeezing gently.

Kissing Jaemin felt amazing. Even more so now that you were sober and entirely conscious of what was going on. Getting lost in the kiss, you nearly forgot what the real point of this was. You could spend hours more just like this, yet you remembered that “this” was not the main idea of your deal with Jaemin. Getting back to the point, you rolled your hips against his slowly, a low hum coming from the boy in response as he squeezed you harder and bucked his hips up against yours.

“Already getting hard?” you teased him, out of breath, as you pulled away from his lips just enough to be able to speak. You were tempted to go in again, yet you chose against it in favor of kissing down his jawline and lower down his neck, sucking very lightly, trying to keep up your hip movements against him at the same time.

“One of the hottest girls I have ever met literally just asked me to suck me off and is currently grinding on my dick, excuse me if I’m a little affected,” he rolled his eyes, a subtle rasp in his voice as he leaned his head back to give you more space. You felt a flutter in your chest at his compliment. You couldn’t lie, it gave you a small boost of confidence seeing him enjoy your actions so freely.

“Hope I can live up to the expectations,” you whispered against his skin, feeling him shiver slightly at the way your breath hit his skin. Once again, you were kissing down his neck and collarbones. Okay, maybe you were stalling. You were anxious to go on further than this. You tried to excuse the long time you were taking by making sure he was aroused enough to proceed but you knew that the real reason was that you were scared to go on.

“Princess, are you sure you really want to go through with this right now?” he asked breathlessly as if sensing your hesitation. “I already said that I will help, if you’re scared that I will back out by the time you feel ready-” he started but cut himself off when you got off his lap and fell to your knees. The smile you sent his way showcased much more confidence than you actually felt. Pressing his lips in a tight line, he chose to quiet down and observe you.

Carefully, ignoring the slight shaking of your fingers, you reached up and untied the knot of his sweatpants. You chose to look up at him again when you carefully tugged them down together with his underwear. Licking his lips slightly, he lifted his hips to help you, his eyes boring into yours. You let the clothing fall to the floor before finally lowering your eyes to his crotch. The sight overwhelmed you.

The reality of the situation hit you hard as the fact that for the first time in your life you were seeing a man naked (more precisely a man’s lower half), and that man was your best friend Jaemin sunk in. His dick was standing hard between his legs, the tip leaking slightly. You couldn’t objectively compare it to anything, but the size still scared you.

Jaemin gave you a few moments to collect yourself, before letting out a sigh and leaning a bit forward to cup your chin and tilt your head up so you would look at his eyes instead.

“You’re not ready for that, are you?” he asked gently, with no hint of accusation or displeasure in his voice. You gulped slowly. You wanted to go through with it, you wanted to prove that you had not been just talking big words earlier. But you couldn’t push yourself to lie. You expected him to be disappointed, but he smiled instead. “Come on, get up,” he offered.

Something in the way he seemed ready to just drop it all despite literally having you on your knees in front of him made you want to push through, so you shook your head in disagreement. He narrowed his eyebrows.

“Jaemin, I’m supposed to be learning here, how can I learn if I don’t go out of my comfort zone,” you pouted slightly.

“You literally don’t feel comfortable doing this right now,” he pointed out, raising his eyebrow. “Get up, we can do this some other time,” he insisted, yet you still refused to back down. An exasperated chuckle left his lips and he shook his head in disbelief. “Fine. Give me your hand then,” he prompted and you reached up, placing your hand in his expecting one.

Slowly, as if to give you time to change your mind, he brought it forward until both your hands were hovering over his length. His eyes looked into yours for confirmation and when you nodded slightly, he placed your hand on himself, gently wrapping your fingers around the shaft. There was a visible tightening in his body at the action and you observed curiously as he took a short breath before placing his hand on top of yours.

“We’ll leave the blowjobs for next time, okay?” he said and you nodded slightly. “For now, this will do. For both of us,” he clarified, his eyes staring into yours intensely. When you nodded in agreement, he wrapped his fingers over yours and gently tightened his hold as he started moving your hand slowly along his length.

Getting the cue, you took it upon yourself to go on and stroke him, carefully watching his expression for any changes and signs if you’re doing well or need to change something. He seemed tense, though, looking back at you as he slowly moved his hand away and left you on your own. You went for a little longer like that, experimenting slightly by tightening your grip, and were pleased when a sharp exhale escaped Jaemin’s lips, assuring you that, well, at least you weren’t doing terribly.

“You can-“ he said after a while, clearing his throat to get rid of the sudden rasp in his voice before trying again. “You can tease the tip as well if you want.” You hummed in acknowledgment, obediently moving your hand up so you could carefully rub your thumb over his head. The quiet groan that he let out put a small smile on your face so you repeated the action just so you could enjoy the way his body twitched slightly at your actions.

Little by little, you were getting more familiar with what he seemed to enjoy and what made him curse under his breath or bite his lips. You were still hesitant at times, yet by now you were getting the grasp of it. A small thought popped into your mind as you watched Jaemin close his eyes. Slowly, you leaned down and stuck your tongue out, licking the tip as you twisted your hand gently around him.

“Y/N-“ he gasped out, as he unconsciously bucked his hips up and his eyes snapped open at you in surprise. You blinked at him, faking innocence. “Didn’t we agree that-“

“I just wanted to see how you’d react,” you chuckled, biting down your smile as he glared at you. “Am I doing okay?” you asked, using the moment to make sure. Instead of replying, Jaemin scoffed and leaned down a bit to get closer to you.

“The fact that you stopped is killing me right now,” he said, his pupils dilated with lust, you noted. “Be a doll and finish me off, princess, okay?” 

The words sounded more like an order than anything and you couldn’t help but gulp slightly. You had been so used to childish and bubbly Jaemin that the slight hint of dominance he showcased made your stomach twist. Having the moment to yourself, you realized just how needy you were yourself. There was no way that the situation wouldn’t affect you, yet you hadn’t really expected it would be like this.

Shifting uncomfortably in your spot, you refocused on the task at hand, meaning, Jaemin’s dick. You noted that the tip was leaking, as well as the slight tightening of the boy’s stomach when you wrapped your hand around him again and renewed your work. Resting your other hand on his thigh, you did your best to make the boy feel good. Squeezing your hand harder at times, trying to maintain a good rhythm, and it wasn’t even about the learning process anymore. You just wanted to give him the most you could right now.

Your effort didn’t go to waste as soon enough, Jaemin’s breathing got hitched, his body tensed up and before you knew it, he came all over your hand and his stomach, making a mess out of his t-shirt (that you honestly regretted keeping on him… but there was time for everything).

It took him a while to calm his breath and focus properly again, his eyes landing on you again. A small awkward smile curved his lips as he reached over to his bedside table and pulled out a pack of tissues. You reached over to get them, but he stopped you and carefully cleaned up your hand instead, as well as his stomach, before helping you up and letting you sit on the bed while he fixed his pants and went to change the t-shirt.

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, feeling how your own arousal had grown to an almost unbearable point. You could ask Jaemin to help you out, you thought… But would that be okay? The deal was to have him teach you the things you didn't know, it wasn't like he owed you any more favors. So you suppressed the idea of having Jaemin eat you out that had popped uninvited and did your best to ignore the wetness between your legs.

“Well, that was something,” he laughed when he was finally back, picking up his forgotten can and taking a large sip. You couldn’t help but notice he avoided looking at you. “You’re not at all bad, you just need to gain confidence,” he smiled at the wall behind your back and you narrowed your eyebrows.

“Nana?” you questioned, getting a hum in response. Yet he still wouldn’t look at you so you got up and walked over to him, grabbing his face gently and turning him so he wouldn’t have the option not to look at you. “You good?” you asked, scared you’d fucked up somewhere. Maybe everywhere.

“Yea, don’t worry, princess,” he smiled, a little strained, yet a blink later he went back again to beaming as usual. "Mind still going over this whole thing, y’know,” he laughed cheerfully.

You hummed quietly, choosing to believe him for now, as you smiled as well.

“Jaem,” you said, drawing a hum from him before you leaned over to peck his cheek. “Thank you for helping me,” you mumbled quietly, before pulling away from him with a grin. “Now, I remember that you promised me at the end of last year that we can watch that show I've been waiting for together and you still owe that to me.”

And with that, the tension from earlier seemed to go away, the deal buried down in both of your minds until the next time, as you made your way to the living room and curled up on the couch together with a pack of chips.

[jaemanon]

all mine. (m)

pairing: enemiestolovers!jaemin x reader

words: 5k+

summary: a ridiculous dare has you pushed back into the company of na jaemin, the true bane of your existence.

genre: smut

warnings: public public sex, squirting, degradation, creampies, multiple orgasms

Keep reading

[jaemanon]

Like The Stars Pt. 3

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3

Pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, sex lessons au, friends to lovers

Word Count: ~8,2k

Includes: high school seniors (everyone is legal of age); canon bisexual mc; side characters donghyuck, renjun, and karina; profanities; obviously, sex lessons; kind of a slow burn; mc is not as oblivious and innocent anymore?; does mc unconsciously have praise kink? she might; protected sex!!

Summary: you'd had a crush on renjun for as long as you could remember, but your lack of experience always stopped you from taking the first step; it's a good thing you have your trusted friend jaemin to help you out

Author's note: i’d like to use the moment to say that pt.1 is already at 1000+ and pt.2 is at 500+ and i really wanna thank all of you for reading so far! it means so much that so many people like it and that there are so many of you that keep up with the story, i hope that you will enjoy this one too !! <33 on a lighter note tho, time is relative so once again, pretend you understand the time skips plz

“Princess, let’s go on a date.”

You’d been on the phone with Jaemin for the past half an hour, discussing an imaginary future where the world was ruled by dogs and arguing which breeds would hold the highest positions. The sudden drop of such a question was enough to have your brain short-circuiting for a second until you realized the meaning of the words.

“A date?” you asked, still too dumbfounded to respond. 

“Yeah, a date,” he repeated with a soft chuckle but you could hear a slight awkwardness in the sound. Something in your chest fluttered. “We’ve literally been having sex for like three months now, might as well go on an official date or something.”

It sounded like it made sense. And at the same time, it absolutely didn’t. Your sex lessons with Jaemin had nothing to do with romance and feelings, and while you did start hanging out a lot because of them, an actual date really sounded way too distant from the nature of your relationship. 

But then your mind took a turn towards the warmth that spread in your chest every time he complimented you, the way you looked forward to any and every moment you could spend with him alone, the way you’d started seeing him differently - he was not just one of your best friends anymore, in the sense that he meant more. Suddenly, a suspicion started growing in you at that realization.

“Y/N? You still there? You can just say no, y’know…” Jaemin coughed awkwardly on the other side of the line. 

“Okay, let’s do it,” you said instead. 

“Wait-” Jaemin sounded genuinely surprised, and honestly you were too. “Are you for real?” he asked and you couldn’t help but think that his voice sounded hopeful. 

“Yeah, sure, I’m up for that,” you confirmed, nibbling on your lower lip. “Where do you wanna go?”

“Just stay where you are,” he said, a bit too obviously excited. The thought made the unfamiliar fluttering in your chest appear again. “I’ll come get you in, like, an hour.”

Next thing you knew, the call had dropped. You stared at the screen of your phone for a moment as the call screen disappeared and made way to your home screen. A photo of you and Jaemin. He’d been the one to take it, in celebration of putting up all the stars on your wall and he’d also been the one to set it as your wallpaper but you never thought of changing it. Looking at his smile made you happy every time you unlocked your phone. 

Maybe that’s something you should have realized sooner.

Your mind was buzzing as you got ready for your date with Jaemin. You were supposed to be in love with Renjun, so why was this date with Jaemin making you so nervously excited? You tried to imagine what it would be like if you were going out with Renjun instead but for some reason that didn’t feel right.

Deciding you should owe it to the fact that they are two different people and it felt unfair to spend a whole day with someone while imagining what it would be like to be with another person, you finished up picking your outfit and waited for Jaemin to arrive. 

“Pretty flowers for a pretty girl?” Jaemin grinned as you opened the door. Your gaze shifted down to a bouquet in his outstretched arm. 

“Daisies?” you raised your eyebrows, chucking. “I do appreciate the uniqueness but that’s kind of an odd choice, no?”

“Yeah, uh,” he scratched the back of his head awkwardly and chuckled, “a granny on the street gave them to me and she was so sweet I just couldn’t say no.” 

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes and laugh softly as you took the small bouquet from him and brought it inside to put in a vase. You could easily believe the grandma story, but a little part of you melted at the idea that maybe he could have actually gotten out of his way to get you flowers. You did your best to disregard the thought for the time being and walked out again.

“So where are we going exactly, Romeo?” you asked, hooking your arm around his with a smile. 

“Does it have to be Romeo exactly?” he asked, sounding a little concerned. “I don’t really feel like dying yet.”

“Sure, sure, be whoever you want,” you shook your head dismissively, in a quite childish manner honestly. “I just wanna know what we’re doing today.”

“You’ll see soon enough,” he smiled and you whined in response. “Come on, it’s not like I could come up with anything that spectacular on the spot, at least let me have the element of surprise with it.” 

“First of all, don’t act like I’ve not been a witness to the extent to which you’re willing to go to impress a girl you like,” you huffed, trying to cross your arms despite the fact that they were still wrapped around one of his. “And sure, this may be a kinda-not-really-a-date date but I will be genuinely offended if you just took me to the convenience store and got me a lollipop or something.”

“Well shit, can we go sit on that bench over there, I need to come up with a new date idea real quick,” he grinned and you hated the fact that you almost believed he could have been planning to do just that. “Relax, it’s at least a little bit better than that.”

You couldn’t make up your mind on whether that sounded reassuring or not. You decided to just trust him for now. With a quiet huff, you unwrapped your arms from his and instead decided on intertwining your fingers with his, which earned you a surprised glance and a sweet smile as his hold on your hand tightened. Some goddamn butterflies in your stomach seemed to come alive at that. 

~

The walk seemed both too long for your curiosity, and yet quite short once you reached your supposed destination - one of the city parks. 

“I didn’t know there’s a fair going on here,” you said as you took in the stalls offering anything from sweet corn to trinkets and games like duck fishing and shooting. There was even a carousel and a small Ferris wheel. 

“Yeah, I found out randomly and I thought you might like it so I really wanted to bring you here,” Jaemin smiled. Then his smile seemed to waver a little as he added: “Of course, if you completely hate it and that was a dumb idea, we can do something else instead…”

You quickly shook your head and looked at him, eyes shining as you smiled. 

“No, it’s perfect,” you reassured him. “I haven’t been to one of these in a while, let’s go look around!” 

The first stop you dragged Jaemin to was a cotton candy stall. You watched with almost child-like fascination as the owner rolled the cotton into a blue flower for the kid in line before you, bouncing a little on your heels excitedly. 

“Which color do you want, princess?” Jaemin asked as your turn came and he pulled out his wallet. You would have argued but you knew there wasn’t much of a point with him. 

“Pink,” you said instead, a smile curving your lips when the stall owner started working on your cotton candy. 

Soon enough you were holding a pink flower in your hand, munching cheerfully on the sugary treat. Jaemin led you as you walked around and looked at what every stand had to offer. You did end up buying a cute bracelet from a really kind lady and matching rings for you and Jaemin because you wanted to “have a memory of your kinda-not-really-a-date date”. It’s not like he tried to argue anyway. 

Instead, once you two had walked away from the stall, he dragged you to the side of the alley and stopped you there. 

“Remember that Polaroid camera you guys got me two years ago?” he asked and you nodded. “Since I rarely have the chance to use it, I actually brought it today. So let’s make some memories, hm?”

“Yes, yes!” you beamed and he took the small device out of his backpack, snapping a quick picture of your intertwined fingers and the rings on them. “Take one of the cotton candy too while it still looks pretty!” you prompted excitedly and he obliged with a soft chuckle. 

With the camera in his hand, he started pulling you around to take more and more photos of you and you had to literally steal it from him so that you could take a few of him as well. You did also take a couple of photos together: one taken by a lady passing by and one he took of the two of you. 

Somehow, you ended up in front of a shooting game stall. Your eyes glided over the prizes offered and stopped on a big stuffed bunny. 

“Look, it looks just like you,” you giggled, pointing at the toy. Jaemin followed your finger and smiled.

“How about I win it for you?” he raised his eyebrows. 

“Can you?” you laughed. “You’ve never even been in the same room as a gun before.” 

“So? You doubt my abilities to win a toy for you?” he asked, sounding almost offended if it wasn’t for the smile still curving his lips prettily. 

“I know better than to underestimate Na Jaemin,” you rolled your eyes. “But you can’t just be good at everything from the first try, you know.” 

Jaemin scoffed at your words. With a determination you rarely saw in him, he placed his things on the counter and paid the man behind the counter for one game. 

“How many points do I need for the bunny?” he asked seriously. 

“120 in total or three of those rabbit targets,” the man chuckled. He’d witnessed your conversation and he seemed entertained by it. 

Briefly, he explained how many points each target brought and Jaemin took upon his task. Surprisingly enough, he was doing quite well. He didn’t go for the rabbits, but five shots later, he hadn’t missed a single one. Setting the gun down, he looked at the man expectantly. 

“110, my boy,” he shook his head. 

“What do you mean 110?!” Jaemin widened his eyes in surprise. “I shot them all!” 

“Yeah, you got three times thirty and two tens,” the man explained patiently. 

“No, no, you said that those were 15 points each!” the boy argued and you could see him getting frustrated. You glanced at the man again. 

“He said that the ones above them are 15 points, Nana, you must have misunderstood,” you said. Bringing a smile on your face, you added: “It’s okay, I told you you can’t make it, let me be right this once, okay?” 

“But…” You could see the pout forming on his face and you couldn’t help but chuckle, reaching over to ruffle his hair. “I wanted to get it for you…” 

“Tell you what, son,” the man spoke up again. “Since no one else is in line right now, I’ll give you one extra shot. If you can get one of the rabbits, I’ll give you the bunny.” 

Jaemin’s face lit up at that as he nodded quickly and picked up the gun again. You couldn’t miss the tension in his body as he aimed for what seemed like ages. When he finally took the shot, you were almost anxious to check the result.

He’d shot the rabbit in the center. The victorious shout from his side told you as much about the achievement. He turned to you, a radiant smile on his lips which you couldn’t help but return. The stall owner went to get the stuffed bunny. 

“You should keep him, kid,” he said as he handed you the toy, winking conspiratorially to you. “He looks like he might be for real.” 

You felt heat rush to your face as you took the plushie and hugged it tightly to your chest. You glanced at Jaemin at found him holding the polaroid towards you. A photo rolled out of the device a moment later. 

“Sorry, you just looked adorable,” he grinned at your accusing glare. “Told you I can win.”

“Only because you got a bonus shot,” you rolled your eyes, yet your eyes drifted down to the toy and a smile grew on your lips. “Thank you.” 

Jaemin returned your smile and reached over to take your hand again as the two of you waved goodbye to the stall owner and walked away. A soft silence fell between you. Your thoughts drifted away to the thumping of your heart as you thought about the way he was squeezing your hand gently and the soft toy in your other hand. How different from before it felt and how similar it was to the way you felt about Renjun. Which was really weird to think about, because you could almost swear that thinking of Renjun at the moment did not make you feel the same way.

“Is there anything else you’d wanna do, princess?” he spoke up suddenly, startling you out of your thoughts. You looked at him again, and it felt like you looked for the first time. The realization almost startled the air out of your lungs.

“We’ve been here for quite a while,” you said, nibbling on your lower lip. It was true, not that you minded. “How about we go get a drink from over there and head home?” you offered and he nodded, leading you to the nearby coffee booth. 

The walk to your house felt much shorter than the one from it, perhaps because you didn't really wanna go home so it could only come too quickly. And indeed too soon you found yourself at the front door of your house. You turned to look at Jaemin. 

“Thank you for today,” he said, surprising you. He smiled at your expression and reached up to ruffle your hair. “I had fun so thanks for actually taking me up on the idea.”

“Oh, no, yeah,” you chuckled. “I had fun too, and I got a new plushie. His name is Nana by the way.”

“Oh what, really?” he gasped in fake surprise, bringing a hand to his chest for a bigger effect. “I can’t imagine how you thought of that!”

You giggled, hitting his arm lightly and he laughed in response. Then you bit your lip for a second, before taking an impulsive decision to lean up and press your lips against his. That seemed to startle him as he gaped as you pulled away. You could see red covering his ears. 

“What, we just went on a date, can I not do that?” you teased, giggling again at his flustered expression. “Come on, it’s not even our first kiss.”

“You…” He stared at you for a moment, maybe fighting his embarrassment or whatever else he was feeling, before finally smiling calmly again. “Thank you for the great date, Y/N. I’ll see you at school tomorrow.” 

With those words, he leaned over to peck your lips softly and then walked away.

~

That Saturday you found yourself reminiscing about the carnival visit, curled up in your bed, and looking through the numerous Polaroid photos you two had taken. Jaemin had given you half of them, ‘as is only fair’ and you were trying to pick which ones to put up on your memory board and which ones to keep somewhere safe. 

There were multiple photos where it was just you. Happily smiling, laughing, sometimes in the middle of saying something or eating cotton candy. It was all due to the fact that he never warned you that he was taking a photo, of course, but there was the undeniable fact that you couldn’t remember the last time you had so much fun without another care in the world. 

Then there were the photos you’d taken of him. He’d said he was giving all of them to you. They weren’t as natural as yours were - mainly because you had to specifically take the camera from him every time you wanted to take one - but despite that his smile was bright and genuine. And there was an… unusual glow in his eyes. It felt like he hadn’t been looking at the camera but at you. And like he was still looking through the photo at you. The clenching in your stomach came back so you quickly put the photo you were looking at away. 

He’d also given you the photo of your hands with the rings and one of the two of you that the random lady had taken. On it, you were clinging onto his side, while his arm wrapped around your waist and held you close. You were leaning onto him and his smile was halfway buried in your hair as if he was a second away from pressing a kiss to the top of your head. 

The two photos right next to each other left a sweet taste in your mouth. It felt like they were real. It felt like your kinda-not-really-a-date date had been… well, really a date. You couldn’t help but think back to the afternoon you’d spent together, the bubbling excitement in your chest when you were with him and the warmth you felt whenever he smiled at you. 

Your eyes traveled over to your bed where Bunny Nana was comfortably nestled between your pillows. You’d hardly let go of it for the first couple of days since the date. And it’d been your faithful companion for a good night’s sleep throughout the whole week. A small smile curved your lips. 

Turning your gaze back onto the photos, you reached out and picked up one of the photos with only Jaemin on it. Your favorite one. As your fingers traced his face on it, you reached a painful conclusion - your feelings had irreversibly changed. 

You couldn’t tell when. You pushed your brain and you couldn’t come up with any recollection of it happening. And you could swear you hadn’t meant for it to happen.

But you were in love with Jaemin. 

In all honesty, the realization scared you. It scared you when you compared it to what you felt towards Renjun - it had the same bittersweet taste, yet this time felt like so much more. It scared you as you realized that what you’d felt towards Renjun was not there anymore - he was one of your best friends and you didn’t wish him to be anything else anymore. But mostly, it scared you as you realized what you’d brought upon yourself. 

Perhaps this was what Hyuck had tried to warn you about. But you hadn’t fallen for Jaemin because of the sex lessons. You’d fallen for him because he was sweet and caring to you, because he always made sure you were okay, because of the way he always knew how to brighten your day. Because you’d allowed yourself to see him, instead of focusing only on Renjun. As you remembered all the times you’d been together, the little jokes, the shared comforting cuddles as you watched a dumb movie or talked about just anything, the stolen pecks whenever you could excuse them, you couldn’t help but realize how oblivious you’d been to your own heart. 

And that same heart was now thumping in your chest, both exhilarated by the freedom that awareness brought, and terrified of the mess lying ahead of you. 

Because you were closer to Jaemin than you’d ever been to Renjun, and because your feelings were apparently stronger this time, and because you weren’t sure whether you’d manage acting oblivious about them when you were not anymore. 

Because you were terrified of ruining what you had with Jaemin, but it was all your fault for starting the whole thing to begin with. 

~

“Have you and Hyuck had sex already?” you asked, eyes fixed on the ceiling in Karina’s bedroom. The girl looked up from her eyeshadow palette and raised a questioning eyebrow at you. 

“Yeah, we have,”  she answered directly. “Why?” 

“How long did it take you? Like, after you got together, I know that it took you ages to get to that point,” you chuckled. 

“Well, that depends,” your best friend laughed, setting down her makeup brush as she walked over to sit down next to you on the bed. “If you count just messing around a little, we’d been doing that since a long time back.” You couldn’t help the surprised gasp that escaped your lips to which Karina just rolled her eyes jokingly. “But if you mean, like, going all the way or whatever, it didn’t happen right away.” 

You hummed, nibbling on your lower lip. You were overthinking the amount of time you’d been stalling with Jaemin. Especially after your recent revelation. 

“Is this about Renjun again?” Karina asked, taking your hand with a concerned look in her eyes. “Still worried about your lack of experience?”

“Yeah,” you lied almost too easily. You trusted your best friend with your whole heart, but you did not feel ready to open up about everything that had been going on. You hoped she’d forgive you for hiding it from her. 

“Babe, he’s known you for years,” she said gently, squeezing your hand. “If your lack of experience can be a breaking point for him, then he’s not the right one for you. Plus, corruption kink is a thing, you know.”

You scoffed and rolled your eyes. 

“It’s not only that, Rina,” you muttered, hugging one of her fluffy pillows. “I’m still scared of what it’s gonna be like. What if the moment comes but I’m too scared to do it? Or what if I keep waiting for ‘the right time’ but it never comes? What if he’s okay with waiting for me but I ruin everything because I’m too self-conscious?” 

“Y/N,” she chuckled softly. “All those ‘what if’s are in your head. What if he’s happy to just have you by his side? What if he wants you to feel comfortable with him rather than just get it over with?” 

You bit your lips, thinking over her words. Of course, she was thinking about you in a potential relationship with Renjun, but you were thinking about how many different ways there were for you to ruin things with Jaemin. Yeah, to him it was just about helping you learn. But you guessed he was expecting that at some point he’d fuck you, and that was something he had made clear he’d like to do, even that he’d thought about it. And, well, he probably wouldn’t have agreed if that weren’t the case. What if he was disappointed that you kept stalling? Yeah, he’d never even hinted at that, but… 

You’d also thought about telling off the deal. Not because you didn’t want to go through with it, you actually wanted to do it more than when you had initially. And that was dangerous. What if it became impossible to hold back once you’d slept with him? But then again, how do you explain why you wanna give up the lessons halfway without lying but also without telling the truth? 

“You’re overthinking again, aren’t you?” Karina pulled you out of your thoughts and you looked at her, pouting at being caught. “Listen, do you remember how it was the first time you were with a girl?” 

“Yeah,” you nodded, smiling a bit at the memory. “We were both so lost and I was terrified of doing something wrong.” 

“And did you do something wrong?” she prompted.

“Probably,” you laughed a little. “But it got easier after that. I felt comfortable with her.”

“Exactly,” Karina winked at you and grinned. “Whether it’s Renjun that you get to be with or not, this is something that you’ll be able to talk about, and you’ll know how far you wanna go and when. Just go with what feels right to you. If it makes you feel better, I was anxious too the first time Donghyuck and I had sex. And for all his big talk, he was just as anxious.” 

“Thanks,” you smiled at her gratefully. You did feel a bit better. There was still a lot you couldn’t talk to her about, but even so, she’d managed to reassure you. 

“Of course,” she waved her hand in an ‘it’s nothing’ gesture. “Now, you can repay me by helping me with my eyeliner.”

~

You’d made up your mind. Your talk with Karina had made you reach a conclusion and you were going to stick with it before you ended up overthinking again and convincing yourself against it. 

“Nana, you’re home, right?” you asked over the phone, a little breathless from the fast walking.

“Yeah, why?” the boy on the other side asked, confused by your sudden call. 

“Can you come down and open the door please?” 

“I’ll come in a second,” he said quickly, and indeed a moment later, he was opening the door for you, a worried look in his eyes. “Is everything okay? Are you alright?” 

You couldn’t stop a chuckle from escaping you as you nodded in confirmation and walked inside. 

“Yes, everything’s fine, I just…” you started, then bit your lips as you searched for the right words. When you didn’t find them, you reached into your handbag and pulled out your most recent purchase, handing it to him. 

He stared at your outstretched hand for a long moment, before looking up at your face again, eyebrows raised in question. You weren’t sure what to say so you just stood there for a while, hoping he’d speak up sooner or later. His eyes fell again to the condom in your hand and he laughed voicelessly. 

“And here I thought something bad had happened to you,” he said finally, crossing his arms and leaning on the wall behind him. 

“Sorry,” you chuckled a little awkwardly. “I just wanted to get here before I change my mind.” 

Your eyes drifted away from him, heart beating loudly in your ears and you briefly wondered if the tension in your body was concealed or if he could see the shaking of your hands. 

“Of course, if it’s a bad time, I can go…” you said quickly, realizing that you’d just appeared out of nowhere without a warning. 

“No, no, it’s as good a time as any,” he said in what you supposed was meant to be a reassuring tone. Yet you either imagined or caught a slight nervousness in his voice. “Come, let’s go upstairs.”

You knew the way to his bedroom with your eyes closed by now. The familiarity of the place did not, however, take off the edge of tension. When you entered, he didn’t sit down. Instead, he looked at you with serious eyes. 

“Princess, if I’m understanding right, you’re here because you want me to have sex with you,” he started, pausing to give you time to disagree. You didn’t. “Are you sure about it?” 

“Yes, I am,” you nodded. “I’ve thought about it a lot and I want to do it. The more I let myself worry, the more I’ll stall.” 

“And you’re sure that you’re ready?” he asked again, stepping closer to you and wrapping his arms gently around your waist. “I promised to help you and I will, but you know that I don’t want you to feel pressured to do something like this.”

“I know, Jaem,” you said, barely hearing your voice yourself. A confession was almost on your lips, but you’d already prepared what you could say to him instead. “Yes, I’m anxious, but I trust you. I’ve thought about this enough to know that I want to do it with you.”

“Okay,” he responded softly, a small smile curving his lips. “Let me know if you change your mind at any point.” 

All it took was a nod from you and his lips were pressed against yours. It started slow, almost as if both of you were just savoring the moment and you loved it. Then he took a step back to his bed, pulling you with him.

Before you had time to think about it, you were sitting in his lap, legs on both sides of his. Your fingers buried in his hair and his hands gripping onto your sides almost desperately. You rolled your hips down and he pulled away from the kiss to groan quietly, then pressed his lips against your neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses along your skin. You let out a shaky breath and leaned your head to the side. When he pulled away, your eyes met and you felt an excited shiver run down your spine. 

“Princess, can I take off your clothes?” he asked, a reassuring smile curving his lips. “And I’m gonna need to hear you on this, okay?”

You chuckled and rolled your eyes, but leaned down to peck his lips. 

“Okay,” you agreed as you looked at him again. “Yes, you can, and if it’s okay, take yours off as well, please.” 

You had just a second to register his pleased smile before he started undressing you. His fingers started swiftly working on pulling off your top and then followed your shorts, leaving you in a mismatched white lacy bra and panties with kittens. An amused chuckle left his lips and he smirked at you teasingly. 

“Listen, I wasn’t planning on this when I was getting ready in the morning,” you defended yourself, flustered with embarrassment. 

“That’s okay, it’s cute,” he smiled and pecked your nose. Then he carefully lifted you by the thighs and let you sit on the bed instead. “Get comfortable for me, okay? I’ll be with you in a second.” 

You nodded, yet didn’t move at all, instead choosing to watch as he took off his clothes. You’d seen him naked many times already yet it never failed to amaze you. And, well, more or less you were looking with new eyes, heart pounding loudly in your chest as you marveled at the sight. Plus, you were naked in front of him for the first time as well… 

“If you keep looking at me like that, I’ll end up forgetting to take it slow,” Jaemin chuckled and you quickly shifted your gaze to his face instead, heat rushing to your face, but also between your legs. He stepped in front of you again and leaned down to be closer to you. “Now, I want you to promise me, if something feels good, you tell me, if something doesn’t, you also tell me.” 

“I will,” you nodded, smiling a little. There was something in the way he spoke, confident yet ever so caring, that made you want to let him do just anything he wanted. 

“Good girl,” he said, pecking your forehead. “Now, first of all, foreplay - always a good thing, goes both ways. But since I’m excited enough as it is, we’ll focus on you this time, okay?” 

He waited for you to voice out your agreement before helping you move up on the bed and get comfortable, hovering over you as he kissed you again. His lips moved against yours slowly and sensually, as one of his hands took hold of your waist. Then it started sliding upwards, moving to your back so he could unclip your bra almost too easily. You expected him to pull away and look, but his lips remained on yours. It was only his fingers that carefully found their way under the fabric and gently rubbed over your nipple. You let out a whimper in the kiss and felt him smirk a little. 

For a short moment, it was as if he was just playing around, fondling your breast or pinching your nipple occasionally. And while you did like it, it was annoyingly not enough. Reluctantly you pulled away from your kiss and pouted at him. 

“Jaem, please, I need you to do more,” you asked quietly, a pleased smile from him meeting your words. And god, you realized, you’d do anything to see more of those. 

“That’s it, I want to hear how I can do better at all times,” he said, almost as if he’d just been testing you. Although you’d guess that he was also just teasing you. Both were equally plausible.

But you didn’t have time to ponder over that as his lips pressed against your jaw and started working their way down. In the meantime, he got rid of your bra, yet you were surprised when suddenly something wet brushed along your nipple. You gasped and looked down to Jaemin looking up at you with a playful spark in his eyes. He hadn’t asked yet you still nodded and then his lips wrapped around the sensitive bud.

He sucked and teased it with his tongue, then moved along to the other one, drawing small whimpers out of you as he worked you up little by little. At one point though, his lips stopped a little higher up your chest and he started sucking persistently on that spot. He only pulled away when you couldn’t help but squirm a little. 

“Did you just leave a hickey on my boob?” you scoffed in amusement, eyebrows raised. 

“Not exactly your boob but close enough,” he grinned. “It’s not that high up, you can hide it, don’t worry.” 

You hadn’t even thought about that. You couldn’t tell him that you didn’t care, so instead you just nodded. You waited for a moment but he didn’t do anything else and you could feel anxiousness starting to build up in you again. 

“So what comes now?” you asked, cringing internally at how dumb that sounded. “I mean like-” you tried to explain but he shushed you with a peck. 

“Can I eat you out?” he asked with a smile that felt too innocent for his question. 

“God, please do,” you blurted out. The knowing look on his face told you that he knew how much you’d wanted that, yet he didn’t say anything. 

Instead, with small open-mouthed kisses, he made his way down your body, settling between your legs. He took a moment to just press featherlight kisses along your thighs. Then his lips pressed against your still clothed clit and your thighs twitched. You couldn’t help but moan quietly when you felt his tongue glide over your soaked slit through your panties. It was so good but it could be so much better, you thought and squirmed a little. You felt his light chuckle more than you heard it as he slowly dragged down your underwear and threw it to the side. And then finally, finally, his tongue met your bare pussy. 

As his lips wrapped around your clit and his tongue pressed down on it lightly, you could swear you were going to lose your mind by the time he was done. And it would be worth it. He lapped kittenishly at the sensitive spot, only moving occasionally to focus on your slit for a short while instead. You were a moaning mess almost too quickly but it all felt so good you couldn’t even feel embarrassed about it. 

Jaemin’s fingers brushed along your thighs and you couldn’t tell if he meant to tease you or not but you couldn’t help but squirm in his hold. He chuckled against you, sending a shiver down your spine and a whine out your lips. 

“Nana, can you please…” you mustered up the courage to speak up, although not very coherently “fingers, your fingers…” 

He pulled away, a string of saliva connecting his lips and your clit. When he licked his lips, it broke, but the sight of his puffy lips glistening with your arousal was enough to have you whimpering again. 

“You want my fingers inside of you, princess?” he asked to confirm and you nodded quickly. “Of course, anything for you,” he smiled and one of his hands immediately reached down between your legs.

His fingers brushed over your hole teasingly before one of them slipped inside you pumping slowly. You squirmed in pleasure, grasping at the bedsheet as you struggled to hold back a moan. Jaemin didn’t seem to help with that though, as his tongue was back on you a moment later. Between his mouth and his finger curling inside you and pressing against your walls, you were easily far too gone. 

“So good,” you whimpered out. “So close, please, don’t stop,” you pleaded, feeling the orgasm building up dangerously. 

Diligently, he obeyed your plea and soon you were slipping over the edge, a moan of his name on your lips, fingers clutching the sheets in a death grip. His tongue worked on you gently until you started calming down finally and only then did he pull away and sit up to look at you. 

“Such a sweet princess you are,” he praised gently and reached over to stroke your head. When you blinked up at him in confusion, he chuckled. “You let me know what you wanted and you also told me what felt good.” 

“You take such a strong stance on that whole thing,” you muttered and he laughed. 

“Because that’s how you learn, babe,” he pointed out. “You listen to what the other person says. I want you to feel good, and I also want you to understand that it’s okay to voice out your needs or preferences, okay?” 

What he said made sense, and although it wasn’t something you were hearing for the first time, you guessed it was nice of him to make sure that you felt comfortable enough to apply it in practice. But that was not what made butterflies rise in your stomach. It was the pet name. Jaemin often called you princess. While it always made you feel soft and mushy on the inside, you were used to it and didn’t give it too much thought. But babe? Babe was something only Karina called you platonically. But babe was also something that from him sounded too nice. You brushed the thought away. 

“Okay,” you agreed. “Can I touch you?” you asked and that earned you another one of those gorgeous pleased smiles. 

“Be my guest,” he said, leaning down to peck your neck again. “Oh, how I would love to cover you in love bites,” he mumbled against your skin and you couldn’t tell if he was telling you or just thinking out loud. You wanted to tell him that he could, but a small still rational part in your brain convinced you against it. 

Hooking one of your arms over his shoulder, you reached your free hand out and carefully wrapped it around his cock, stroking it slowly. You teased the tip and Jaemin exhaled slowly against your skin, burying his face in your neck. You sped up your hand movement a little, squeezing your fingers around him gently and he groaned, grabbing your hips. 

“Is this good?” you asked quietly, heart thumping in your chest. 

“So good,” he groaned, pressing his lips to your collarbone shortly. “But if you could do it faster, it would be amazing.” 

You were happy to oblige, even happier when you felt him shiver in your arms. Yet as soon as a moan escaped his lips, he was fumbling to stop you. 

“I don’t want to come before I’m inside you,” he explained breathlessly to your quizzical look and you bit your lips. 

Right. He would soon be inside you. That same dick you were just stroking would be entering you and nervousness found its way to you again.

“Princess, stay with me,” Jaemin called out, stroking your hair gently. “Are you still sure you want to do this?” 

“I am,” you confirmed, your free arm joining the other one around his neck. “I’m just nervous. Is it going to hurt?” 

“It might,” he confirmed what you already knew. “But for that reason, we have…” Instead of finishing his sentence, he reached over to his bedside drawer and pulled out a bottle of lube. “You’re already quite wet, but it’s always easier with some additional help.” 

You nodded in understanding and he sat back up to pour some of the liquid onto his fingers. He rubbed his fingers together to make sure they were properly covered and then brought them down between your legs. You shivered slightly at the cool wet feeling and Jaemin looked up at you. 

“Oh, no, I’m okay,” you quickly assured him. “Go for it.” 

Two of his fingers pushed inside you slowly. It wasn’t your first time using lube so you knew what to expect, but you still couldn’t help but moan at the feeling as his fingers started working inside you and spreading you out. As you relaxed more into his touch, he carefully added a third finger and you let out something between a gasp and a moan. Jaemin chuckled quietly, rubbing his thumb over your clit. 

“If you do that again, I might actually cry,” you whimpered and he laughed. “I think… I don’t really know, but I think I’ll be fine like this, can we…” 

“Yes, princess?” he chirped as if he didn’t know crystal clear what you meant. You scoffed, feeling heat rush down your whole body. 

“Jaemin, just fuck me already, please,” you said as decisively as you could without your voice shaking. 

“Come here, princess,” he smiled, pulling you to sit up in front of him. “You’ll help me put on the condom.” 

“Why me?” you asked, narrowing your eyebrows. “I think you know how to do it yourself.” 

“I do know,” he rolled his eyes jokingly, “but that doesn’t mean it wouldn’t feel nice if you did it instead.” 

You let out a small ‘oh’ and nodded, so he smiled and handed you the packet. When you looked down, you noticed it wasn’t the one you’d brought and chuckled slightly at the idea that he had been prepared already. You tore it open and pulled out the rubber. 

“Squeeze it here,” Jaemin instructed and your fingers pinched at the closed end. “Now put it on and roll it down.” 

You followed through, experimentally stroking his shaft a couple of times once it was fully on. 

“Good enough?” you asked, looking up to meet Jaemin’s eyes again. You couldn’t stop yourself from leaning up and kissing him shortly. 

“Perfect,” he smiled. 

He reached over for the lube once again, pouring some of it on his hand again and then stroking himself a few times as you watched a little curiously. Jaemin used his free hand to tilt up your chin and tsked quietly. You pouted but he pecked away your pout and pushed you back until you were laying down again. 

“Ready?” he asked and despite the anxious shiver that ran down your spine, you said yes. 

It started out slow. You wouldn’t say it was really that painful but you could definitely feel the stretch, thankful for the lube Jaemin had generously applied. You heard yourself whimper out at some point and he immediately stopped, peppering your face with little kisses. 

“I’m good,” you assured him with a trembling voice, gently threading your fingers through his hair, “kiss me and keep going.” 

And he did. His lips pressed against yours in what was probably the sweetest and most gentle kiss in your life so far. At the same time, his hips pushed forward again. You got so lost in the kiss that it took you a while to notice that he’d stopped again. He was already fully inside you, you realized, as you broke the kiss. 

“How are you feeling, princess?” he asked quietly. 

“Good, I’m feeling good,” you said honestly, brushing through his hair, already damp with sweat. “How are you feeling?” 

“Never been better,” he chuckled, pecking your nose. “You feel so good around me. And you’re doing so good.” 

“Is it hard for you to go so slow and hold back?” you smiled, twirling a strand of his hair around your finger. You were beaming on the inside from his praise though. 

“Don’t think about it, okay?” he grinned and you giggled. “Take your time and tell me when you’re okay to go on.” 

“It’s okay, Jaem, you can move,” you said and he raised his eyebrows doubtfully. “I’m sure, just don’t go all out on me from the start, hm?” 

“As you say,” he smiled and pecked you again. 

And then started moving slowly. It took you a moment to get used to the feeling of his dick sliding in and out of you, but soon enough you were already moaning softly, gripping onto his hair in pleasure. You made sure to let him know that you liked it, that you were okay with going faster, with going harder and he followed through. 

You were seeing stars again. Jaemin was working his magic on you again, your moans were mixing with his and the sounds of sex. When he leaned down to kiss you again, you whimpered against his lips. You were so close to cumming again and by the tension in his body, you could guess he was too. 

“Jaem, I’m close,” you whimpered as you pulled away from the kiss and he smiled against your lips. “Keep going, please.” 

“Of course, princess,” he responded, voice raspy and low and you could cum just from that.

Truth be told, it took so little after that that maybe you did indeed. Your orgasm washed over you so intensely that you were digging your nails in his shoulder blades so hard you were sure you’d leave marks, only self-aware enough to move your hands from his hair before you’d pulled out a chunk of it.

You only somewhat registered Jaemin cumming as well once he started gradually slowing down and came to a stop. You were both panting heavily, too blown out to even move at the moment. You brought one of your hands up again to stroke his hair gently and his forehead dropped onto your shoulder. 

You weren’t sure how long you’d spent that way before he finally moved, pulling out of you and taking off the condom. You sat up in the bed crossing your legs as he tied the rubber, then went to throw it in the bin. Then he came to sit next to you, pushing a few sweaty strands of hair away from your face. 

“So… how do you feel, princess?” he asked carefully. “Does it hurt anywhere? Did you like it?” 

“I feel honestly great,” you hummed, smiling a little. “It was amazing. I knew I made a good choice with you, thank you so much.” 

“Well, congrats, your basic Sex Ed course has been completed, you’re ready to conquer a man’s bed,” he smiled in response and ruffled your hair. 

Despite the lighthearted truth in his statement, your heart clenched painfully. 

“Nana, can I go take a shower?” you asked instead of acknowledging his words. 

If he noticed your avoidance, he didn’t comment on it. Instead, he found you a towel to use, brought your clothes to the bathroom for you, and explained to you which bottle contained what. He didn’t offer to join you and you couldn’t decide whether you were relieved or disappointed. You didn’t offer either. 

As hot water started pouring on you, you let out a quiet sight. There was no doubt anymore. You were down, and you were down bad. You couldn’t go back to being Jaemin’s friend. It had been easier with Renjun, you’d only ever imagined what being with him would be like. But with Jaemin, you knew. And you didn’t know if you could bear letting it go. 

You ordered yourself not to cry. As you washed your body, your eyes fell on the hickey he’d left you. You reminisced over the past three months. About all the times he’d stolen kisses from you for no apparent reason. About his little remarks of ‘I imagined this’ or ‘I wanted to do this’ or ‘I’ve been waiting for this’. About the way he looked at you sometimes. About the game stall owner’s words. About the photos. 

A small traitorous part of you wanted to put those pieces together and maybe hope that he’d have some feelings for you too. It sounded too good to be real, yet what if… 

Clinging onto that little hope, you dried your body, got dressed again, and returned to his bedroom. He’d put on loose gray sweatpants and a black t-shirt while you were gone and he looked too good in that. You couldn’t help yourself as you walked over and pecked his lips. 

“Thank you,” you said softly. 

“You don’t need to thank me for anything,” he smiled in response. “Would you like to stay over?” 

“Sorry, my parents will be waiting for me,” you shook your head. Half a truth, as your parents were indeed home but you’d doubted they would disagree if you told them where you were. You just needed some time to think everything through. “I’ll see you tomorrow at school, okay?” 

You could have imagined the disappointment on his face. But as you made your way home, you let the idea warm you up. By the time you reached your front door, you’d made up your mind - distancing yourself would be impossible, and hiding your feelings was going to do you more harm than good.

You were going to be honest with him.

~

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[jaemanon]

𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐥𝐲

“𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘐 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶.” - 𝘓𝘦𝘦𝘏𝘪, "𝘖𝘯𝘭𝘺“

Pair:  Jaemin x female reader Genre:  Fluff, romance, smut, established relationship WC:  5.3k Synopsis:  Your days are breezy and life is easy with Jaemin by your side. Eight months after your mutual confession during the holiday vacation, your love is as profound as ever and only continues to grow. With your aunts beach house empty and begging for company, you and Jaemin decide to take a trip with just the two of you this time around. After months of developing your relationship into something stable and laced with passion and tenderness, you definitely deserve the time alone, and spending the week on your own time plus island time can only do wonders for your relationship. Warnings:  Sexual content, unprotected sex

 * sequel to Upon Your Invitation *

 ▻ 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 | 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘣𝘰𝘢𝘳𝘥 | 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳

  In the morning, the sun is but a feather against your skin; pale yellow streaks soft like a flower descending the walls with the sun’s ascension, caressing his face that beams even in the deepest of slumbers. The sea-blue walls are no match for the golden warmth of the summer light filling the room, no match for the boy next to you emitting the most alluring comfort, his proximity a blanket in itself.

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[jaemanon]

oh my god 😭😭 is it possible for a pt 2 where they finally fuck and they just both lose their mind 😭

I dont know why, but this took it out of me. like as if i wasn’t writing a part two to something i literally wrote myself lmao. also i feel like towards the end you can tell why type of music i started listening to if you think about it hard enough pffttft

Anyways, part one here in case the link you put doesnt work for some reason

Warnings: not much other than just smut and me being fucked in the head

——

——

Jaemin fears, as he stares down at you, that he might have created something evil. 

Once he breached the threshold of having skin to skin contact with you, it was like you were obsessed with the feeling of him moving against you. It was rare if you two were together, and you weren’t grabbing at him or finding a way to grind up against him in some way. But he couldn’t even think to complain. 

He was still careful, your eyes still screaming with both apprehension and overwhelmed pleasure every time he thrusts against your skin, but there was always that little voice in the back of his head that screamed at him to just let go and destroy you. He knew it would be easy, your mind so flooded with arousal and love for him that you would let him do anything, and there were more than a few times that he almost took advantage. 

But he couldn’t, you were his little play thing, but all the same you were his little angel, and he’d never forgive himself if he pushed you too far before either of you were ready. 

There were moments of “just the tip.” Him just slipping an inch into you to fill you with his come, before he pulled away and brought you to cuddle into his warm arms. And he thought this would be one of those times again, until your eyes glossed over in a way he had yet to see. 

“Jaem,” you puff in a whiny tone, your body squirming as he slipped himself under the seat of your underwear, the slick arousal that spilled from you and coated his skin being so overwhelming that he almost didn’t hear your voice, “please, Jaemin, please.”

“Shhh,’ he hushes sweetly, running his palm down the side of your face as he chanced a single thrust forward, “patience, angel. We’re almost there. I swear I’ll make you feel good.”

“Nooo,” you croon slowly, twitching your hips petulantly as you reach and tug on his shoulder, “more, please.”

He freezes as your legs wrap around his hips, knocking him forward slightly until he presses against your entrance, a soft hiss coming from his clenched teeth. He looks down at you with wide eyes, searching your face for confirmation of what he hopes you’re asking. And when he just sees your face twisted in delirium and your breath coming out it quick huffs, he knows you were dangling the promise of his undoing right in front of his face. 

“More?” He asks with a teasing grin, running his other hand softly up your tensing stomach, “are you sure, my love?”

“Please, Jaemin,” you repeat as you eyes slide almost completely shut, “need you so bad.”

“Where do you need me baby?” He asks, further torturing you and him, “show me where it hurts.”

The hand that doesn’t grip his shoulder tightly slips slowly between your bodies, your fingers shaking slightly as it brushes against his bare hip, and when you wrap your soft hand around his length and push it to sink into you slightly, he almost chokes on air. 

“Thought I was too big for you?” He grins, reminding you of the way your eyes still turn to saucers whenever he strips off his pants. 

“Don’t care,” you confirm, digging your heel into the back of his thigh as cute determination pulls at your features, “I can take it, I swear.”

He nods softly, gently pinching your cheek as he pulls away from you in apprehension. The dirty look you give him when you no longer feel him pressing into you makes him smile, but after he untangles your arms and legs from him before he grabs your waist, you sigh quietly in content. 

He turns your body slowly until you rest on your stomach, guiding you so your head rests turned so he can still see your face, and when you sink into the bed below you, he climbs to hover over you as he presses his lips against your shoulder blade. 

“Tell me if it’s too much,” he demands as pushes your thighs apart. As one of his hand tangles with yours and presses into the bed to keep his weight off your body, the other slowly trails down your spine, and when he reaches to guide his length back towards your body, he hesitates at the sound of you quietly gasping, “don’t let me hurt you.”

You hum in agreement, shivering and relaxing your body as he bumps his tip against your clit, and when he moves up to catch onto your entrance your hand tightens around his. 

You feel his hot breath against the back of your neck, the warmth of his body surrounding you as he nuzzles his face into your skin. He handles you so gently it makes your heart thump in your chest and your stomach flip, and when he starts to press soft kisses across your shoulders, you lift up to meet him as he starts to sink in. 

The first inch of him you’ve become used to, but the initial push still makes you shiver. The way he stretches your body makes your feet lift up behind him, and when your toes brush against his thighs, he lets out a small laugh. 

He moves his hand away from his length to push against the small of your back, pushing you down into the mattress so you curve perfectly for his eyes. He takes a moment to breathe, staring down at the way the muscles of your back shift, before he finally starts pushing into you. 

You both let out matching rushes of air when he feels you wrap tightly around him. He watches intently as your mouth falls open at the stretch, and even though he hasn't even gotten close to being halfway inside you, his vision starts to blur around the edges. 

“So good for me,” he praises, his voice strained and throat dry. He can feel you clench around him at the sound of his voice, and small whimpers come from your open mouth. You look heavenly below him, your shoulders tense as you tears spring to your eyes, and it takes everything in him to not shove himself inside you and start fucking you like an animal. 

The heat between your thighs is overwhelming, the size of him feeling a lot more than you expected shockingly, as every time you’ve imagined this very moment, you knew it would feel like he was splitting you in two. When he mumbles something along the lines of ‘halfway there’ you feel your brain swirl into confusion, but with the way his twitching hips force him to thrust gently, you can’t seem to form the words to ask him if what he says is true. 

When his hips finally press against the flesh of your ass, you let out a deep sob. Your entire body shakes and your thighs squirm uncontrollably, but when he licks and bites harshly at the side of your jaw, you feel like you may pass out. 

“Fuck,” he curses harshly, his arm giving out when you squeeze around him and making him land on his elbow. His other arm pushes under you and curls around your waist, and as he lays flush against your back, he can’t help the way his hips start grinding against you. 

You let out whimpers and cries that only somewhat resemble begging pleads, your thighs pushing further apart as you push up against him. It feels like he reaches up into your stomach, filling you more than you could ever imagine, but even though it sets everyone of your nerves on fire, you can’t imagine being anywhere else. 

He groans almost like he’s in pain when he pulls his hips back, his blunt nails digging into your side as he tries to rock against you as gently as he can. You feel so soft below him, his fingers pushing into your plush flesh, that he almost feels like he’s having an out of body experience. 

His skin slaps quietly against yours as his hips pick up their pace, his eyes darting up to your twisted face to make sure he doesn’t do more than you can handle, but when he sees the delirious grin that stretches your lips and the slight amount of your drool that drips onto his sheets, he knows you enjoy this just as much as him. 

He pushes small squeaks out of you when he shifts his legs to fuck into you faster, your body turning to jelly as you happily let him use your body the way he wishes. And when he wiggles his hand down to push into your neglected clit, you start to let out desperate chants of his name. 

You feel like you might fuse into the mattress with the way his body shoves you down with its every move, his tongue falling out as he laps against your heated skin before he lets out a growl and sinks his teeth into your shoulder. And even with him pushed so tightly against you, you want nothing more than to have him closer, wishing there was some way for your bodies to phase into one another. 

The orgasm that washes over your body is nothing like the ones he’s brought upon you before, your eyes rolling back harshly into your head as the only noises that come from you are broken cracks of sound. 

Your body tensing around him forces him to push against you harder, the attempt to be gentle slipping from his mind as he chases his own end. And the way tears falls from your eyes and your body tries to curl into itself only pushes him more, his hand moving more rapidly as he fucks you through your blinding pleasure. 

He lets out a moan of your name that makes his chest shake against your back when he starts to come, his hips finally stilling again as his sharp hip bones dig into your skin. He pulls you tighter against him as he fills you to the brim, and when you start pathetically whining for a kiss, he fears he might be able to come again. 

He makes sure he stays pressed deeply inside of you as he turns you at the waist enough for his lips to lock onto yours, and when he tastes the salty remains of your tears sticking to your lips he can’t help but groan into your open mouth. 

He continues to softly thrust into you as you both pant and shift as a unit, his body begging to feel every inch of your skin against his, and as you cling to him and squeeze his hand tightly, he can’t imagine himself not letting you have every little thing you ask for.