jagreyo

[jagreyo]

There are many things I could say to you. This letter won't sum up the message I'm dying to tell you but many of those words may not be very nice and most of them probably wouldn't make a difference to you in any way. With all the things I would want you to hear from me, here it is:

I forgive you —

I forgive you for keeping me up so many late nights wondering where you were, who you were with, what you were doing, because you wouldn't bother to tell me.

I forgive you—

I forgive you for calling me names like crazy, annoying, attention seeker, pathetic, childish and all because I wanted you to love me, and only me. Is it even too much to ask? I guess it is.

I forgive you—

I forgive you for the countless fights about the same things over and over again because it seemed that no matter how much it hurt me, you didn't care. For all your “it won't happen again's" when you always did the same mistake and for your “give me another chance's" when you truly didn't deserve them.

I forgive you—

There is no hope in holding onto the anger and sadness of something that was not real. Of someone that is not even man enough to respect me and fight for me.

I forgive you—

I forgive you because in order to love who I am, I cannot hate the experiences that molded me. I will never get back the many things you have taken from me but there is one thing I have and it is something I could never have while being with you. Something I have gained while letting you go —Self Worth.

So I forgive you.

I forgive you for making me believe that the never ending feeling of fear, sadness, and hopelessness was love.

Don't worry, I forgive you.

Have a life now.

—🥀j.a