jaysbaefie
jaysbaefie
nia
98 posts
i <3 park jongseong
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
jaysbaefie · 7 days ago
Text
the loss | nrk
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you push niki one too many times, and he fucks you on the bench—just to remind you that losers don’t get to walk away.
genre: rivals au
pairing: swimmer!niki x bratty!reader
warnings: porn w very little plot, bratty!reader, hard dom!niki, mean!niki, cornering, bantering, dub-con ish, degrading, forced submission, spanking, manhandling, oral (m. rec), hair pulling, chocking, unprotected p in v, breeding, creampie, multiple rounds, overstimulation, no after care whatsoever. i think that’s it….?
wc: 6.2k
a/n: back again with another porno…am i ashamed? slightly. i wanted to post something and this dynamic has been on my mind for a while.. yes i have like 2 other fics dying in my drafts that i have promised but baby that’s plot…this is porn. anyways…enjoy! as always, reblogs, notes and comments are always appreciated!
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
you'd noticed it from the first lap—niki was off today.
his strokes were sluggish, flip turns messy, timing just a split second late. not that he'd ever admit it. niki wasn't the kind of swimmer who made excuses, but the difference was obvious—and you weren't about to let it slide.
"what's wrong, golden boy?" you called from your lane, teeth flashing through the spray. "forgot how to swim?"
he didn't respond—just wiped the water from his eyes and pushed off again. but you caught the flick of his jaw, the twitch of his fingers as he adjusted his goggles. you were under his skin already, not that you didn't practically live there already.
perfect.
the two of you had been rivals since 1st year. different schools, same arena, always scheduled to practice back-to-back. you had similar event times, similar passions, and very different personalities.
you happened to be loud, cocky, relentless. whereas, niki was unreadable, quiet, but impossible to ignore.
the tension between you was legendary. not quite friendly, not quite hostile—just constant and sharp.
today, though, you could tell something was cracking.
practice was supposed to be a standard drill day, but your coach must've picked up on the tension, because halfway through he clapped his hands and smirked.
"how about some friendly races? we've got the lanes—let's make it fun."
fun.
as if you hadn't been dying to make niki eat your dust for years. he said nothing, just nodded and slid into the water beside you, shoulders tight, goggles already on. he didn't look at you once, and you scoffed at his cold demeanour.
the first race was a 100m free, you won by a body length.
the second was a medley sprint, you beat him again.
and by the third race—when you were practically bouncing with smug satisfaction—you leaned over the lane divider and said, just loud enough for him to hear: "kinda feels like bullying at this point."
he exhaled slowly. he didn't answer, didn't look up. but the tension in his arms, the way he adjusted his cap for the fifth time—it was all falling apart.
he was seething, and you loved it.
after the final cooldown lap, he climbed out without a word—grabbing his towel and heading straight for the locker room. no eye contact, no handshake, not even a grunt.
you waited exactly 30 seconds before following him in, still dripping, still grinning. you just couldn't help yourself, when it came to rubbing your victory in someone's face—you had no morals.
you step into the empty men's locker room with a cocky bounce in your step, towel slung around your neck, still soaked and grinning like the devil himself.
it's quiet inside—steam fogging the mirrors, a few lockers clanging shut in the distance. most of your team's still showering. his? already gone. it was a dry monday at the pool, people were quick to pack their belongings and leave.
except for him.
niki stands at the far end, back to you, towel around his waist, water dripping from his hair. shoulders flexing as he digs through his bag searching for his clothes.
you take your time walking over, "hey, sore loser."
he doesn't answer.
you hum, tapping a finger against the cold metal locker beside him, "what happened out there, huh?" you grinned, your plump lips bitten raw from the heavily chlorinated water.
"pretty sure your form fell apart after the 2nd lap." you then gasped mockingly, "don't tell me i made you nervous."
he moves like he's not listening—like he's too calm, too cool to care—but you see the way his jaw ticks.
you lean in, voice syrupy-sweet, "kinda embarrassing, right? the fastest guy on your team getting his ass handed to him by me?"
still nothing, he doesn't even look at you. just pulls out a dry shirt and drops it onto the bench.
you smirk, continuing, "you were supposed to be the golden boy." you desperately search his body for a reaction, "what, did the pressure finally get to you?"
you tilt your head, "or maybe i just fucked you up in the head a little. maybe that's why you can't swim straight—'cause every time i pass you, you get distracted watching my ass cut through the water."
that gets him. he still doesn't face you, but his fingers stop moving. still and stiff.
you press closer, letting your towel slip down just enough to bare your collarbone. you're dripping all over the tile, soaked swimsuit clinging to your skin. but you don't care, you've got him right where you want him.
or so you think. "but don't worry," you say, mock-sweet, "you still looked cute losing."
and then, finally—he turns. slowly, his eyes sweep over you once. grazing over your bare legs and your navy blue towel that clung to your form loosely and then back down from your smug mouth to the water sliding down your legs.
you're smiling when he steps forward, but it falters instantly when he doesn't stop. keeps walking until your back hits the solid green locker behind you.
"done?" he asks, voice low.
you blink. "...what?"
"talking," he says, like you were dumb. "are you done?"
you scoff, trying to roll your eyes, but you're caught off guard by how close he is—dripping wet, towering over you, and still too calm.
"you've got a lot of nerve talking the way you do," he says quietly, "for someone who couldn't even keep her thighs still when we swam next to each other last week."
your breath catches and your face heats instantly.
"you—"
"you think i didn't notice?" he leans in, voice steady. "i always notice."
you open your mouth but no sound comes out. and that's when his hand lifts—palm resting right beside your head, boxing you in.
"you walk around in that tiny swimsuit, mouthy as fuck, pushing every button like it won't come back to bite you."
"so tell me," he says, tilting his head so his blonde locks fell over his eyes, "what exactly were you hoping i'd do today?"
you stare, lips parted. because you're not so sure anymore. you thought you were pushing him, you thought you were in control.
but right now—pressed between cold metal and niki's steady, smoldering stare—you feel anything but in charge.
you don't usually lose control, not with him.
not with anyone.
you talk your shit, play the part, swim hard and leave people gasping in your wake—figuratively and literally. no one handles you. no one checks you.
but niki's not backing up and suddenly your back's to the lockers, heart pounding under your damp suit, mouth open and ready to fire—except nothing's coming out.
he watches you. quiet. eyes heavy-lidded. heat rolling off him in waves.
"what, no more comments?" he murmurs. "don't tell me you ran out."
you find your voice, barely, "just giving you time to come up with a decent excuse for choking out there."
his mouth twitches, but not quite into a smirk.
"right." he steps closer, towel loose around his hips. "then why are your legs shaking?"
you freeze, he looks down and you do too. your thighs—still wet, still dripping pool water—are trembling just the tiniest bit.
from exhaustion. from adrenaline. you tell yourself that's why.
his gaze lifts again and you hold it, stubborn.
"fuck off," you mutter.
he tilts his head, "i think you want the opposite."
and then—softly, like it costs him nothing—he presses his hand flat against the locker beside your head.
"you've been begging for my attention since the first time we swam next to each other," his eyes glare you down, his head tilting downwards so he could look you in the eyes.  "snapping at me. showing off. trying so hard to get under my skin."
his voice stays low, unreadable. "you don't hate me. you just don't know what to do with yourself when you're not the one in control."
your jaw tightens. "shut up."
"make me."
you suck in a breath and that's when he leans in—close enough that your noses almost touch, voice a dangerous whisper: "you keep running that bratty little mouth like you're not one second away from letting me shut it with my cock."
your body reacts, involuntarily.
heat shoots down your spine, and you shift without thinking—hips pressing forward just slightly, thighs brushing together.
he sees it, he definitely sees it. but he doesn't take the bait. instead, he pulls back a fraction, calm as ever.
"you wanted to win?" his voice gruff. "congrats. you beat me in the pool." he then pauses, the heat of his toned body causing your brain to malfunction momentarily, "but in here?" he glances around the empty locker room. "you don't stand a chance."
you grit your teeth. "you're bluffing."
he laughs—just once. low and sharp.
"baby," he says, so quietly you feel it in your bones, "you've been bluffing since the day we met."
you push him—hard, palms flat to his chest. "fuck you."
"you'd love to." and now he steps back. like he's giving you space. like he's letting you walk away. but the smirk that finally curves across his lips tells you exactly what he's doing.
he's letting you think you have a choice.
you hate the way your body reacts to him. the way your stomach dips when he gets close. the way your thighs ache from just a few low words.
you've been running your mouth all practice, and suddenly you're the one pressed against cold metal, caught in the middle of a storm you started—but now it's slipping through your fingers, fast.
no.
no way.
you're not letting this blonde bimbo fucking win like this.
so you do what you always do when the tension spikes and your pulse won't slow down: you get nasty.
you square your shoulders, push off the locker with a laugh that sounds just a little too forced.
"god, you're such a sore loser."
he raises a brow, still silent.
"it's actually kinda embarrassing," you add, tilting your head. "big strong ni-ki—talk of his team, always so serious—getting wrecked by a girl who's half his size."
your voice drips with mock pity, "what does that make you?" you pause to faux think for a second,  "a loser with a superiority complex?"
he blinks once, he doesn't flinch.
"or maybe you just choke when someone's actually better than you." you begin to jitter with each word that spews out of your mouth. "you gonna cry about it? or throw a tantrum in the showers where no one can see?"
still nothing and god, it infuriates you.
"go on. storm out like a little bitch again."
silence.
he just looks at you. dark eyes steady, unreadable.
you expect him to snap. bark something. shove you. anything.
instead? he steps in slow, close, deliberate and leans down until his lips brush your ear.
"done flailing?"
you stop breathing.
his voice is low, lethal, "you're not intimidating. you're not untouchable." he pauses,  "you're desperate."
your stomach drops.
"you want to pretend like all this—" his hand brushes the strap of your dark green swimsuit "—doesn't mean anything, but your body's telling the truth."
your pulse spikes, he knows it.
he tilts his head, still murmuring, still terrifyingly calm, "wanna keep lying? go ahead." he grins, a small laugh leaving his pink plump lips, "but the next time you open that smart mouth, you better be ready to pay for it."
he pulls back, eyes dropping to your lips. "and if you call me a loser again," he murmurs, "i'll fuck the attitude out of you."
your knees nearly give out, but he's not done.
"so go on. say something bratty," he says, like he's testing you. "give me a reason."
your throat tightens. you open your mouth— and nothing comes out. not a single word.
he smirks, finally. "that's what i thought."
you're burning.  every nerve on fire, skin prickling, heart racing like you're on the starting block—but there's no whistle. no gun. no escape.
and still—still—you can't shut up.
you're a brat down to the bone. and even with your knees weak and heat pooling between your legs, even with niki's breath still ghosting your skin, you can't let him walk away with the last word.
so you spit it out—sharp and venomous and a little shaky, "still doesn't change the fact that you lost."
his gaze lifts slowly.
"and no matter how smug you act, it must eat you alive knowing you'll never be as good as me."
his jaw flexes.
"you're just all talk, niki." you force another laugh, "all bark, no bite."
you pause and then smile, "and if i wanted someone to fuck me breathless?" your eyes glaze over his face, watching his jaw tick. "it sure as hell wouldn't be a guy who can't even keep up in the water."
the silence that follows is instant. thick.
and then— he laughs.
low. humorless. dangerous.
"alright."
your stomach flips at the sound, you felt yourself gush.
he drops the towel from his hips. your breath catches—eyes flashing down without thinking—and he sees it. sees the way your gaze sticks, the way your lips part.
he steps forward, grabs your chin, his fingers firm but not cruel—and tilts your head up to look at him.
"you wanted to mouth off one more time?" he raises an eyebrow.  "go ahead. just remember—this is what you asked for."
his hand drops. "bend over the bench."
you freeze and blink.
"w-what?"
he doesn't repeat himself. doesn't need to. his eyes are heavy and unblinking, voice steady, "you're not walking out of this room without being reminded who you belong to."
and then, "and when i'm done, you're going to thank me for ruining you."
you don't move.
he told you to bend over the bench, and you're still standing there—defiant, knees wobbly, throat dry, but still trying to glare at him like he didn't just peel every inch of power off you like a second skin.
he notices, of fucking course he does.
niki's always been good at seeing straight through your bullshit. today, he's done letting you hide behind it.
he steps forward—slow, steady—and you catch the brief flick of heat in his eyes as he looks you up and down. like he's deciding how to start.
"you think you're clever, huh?"
you scoff, but it's weak.
his hand lifts—trailing fingertips along the line of your arm, down the damp curve of your side. he doesn't touch anywhere dangerous, he doesn't give you what you want.
and that's exactly what drives you insane.
"you talk a big game," he murmurs, "but your body's already begging."
you open your mouth to argue—and then gasp when his knuckle grazes the hem of your suit.
"shaking." his fingers slide down the inside of your thigh, barely a whisper. "dripping." he leans in, "and not from the pool."
you stiffen, teeth clenched.
"say it," he whispers. "you want it."
you glare, "go to hell."
he smiles, "ladies first."
and then—he moves behind you. hands settling at your hips, thumbs dipping beneath the band of your suit. he doesn't yank it off. doesn't rush. he just holds you there.
"you know what the problem is?" he says softly. "you've never had someone fuck you like they mean it."
your stomach flips.
"you push and push, trying to find the edge, hoping someone grabs you before you fall off." his breath is warm against your neck. his voice stays steady, "and now you have."
he peels the suit down slowly, agonizingly slow—until it clings to your thighs, slick and wet. you were exposed, your breasts and cunt on full display.
you could feel him, his cock thick and heavy against your back.  you suck in a breath.
he traces one hand up the back of your leg, stopping at the dip of your lower back.
"bend over."
you don't. not yet.
"make me," you whisper, voice cracking just a little.
he hums, "i will."
and then—finally—his palm lands on your ass in one sharp, controlled slap. not hard enough to hurt. just enough to steal the air from your lungs.
"last warning," he says. "next time you talk back, i won't be so nice."
you swallow hard.
and slowly, trembling, you fold over the bench.
he lets the silence stretch. lets you sit there, exposed and tense, pride crumbling by the second.
then you feel his hand again—this time between your thighs, knuckles brushing your heat.
"look at you." he chuckles darkly, "still pretending you're not dripping for me."
you whimper and he still hasn't even taken his time with you yet.
your cheek's pressed to the cold bench now, legs trembling. arms burning. swimsuit halfway down your thighs and niki behind you—silent for a moment, watching.
you hate that your body's already arching toward him, hips twitching like you're searching for friction. you hate that he hasn't even really touched you yet, and your skin still feels like it's going to ignite.
he drags one finger through your folds. slow. careful. barely any pressure.
and then clicks his tongue, "messy."
you stiffen.
"this wet over a couple words?" he laughs tauntingly, "i didn't even do anything yet."
you hiss through your teeth, "fuck you."
he laughs, low and sharp, "you really don't learn, do you?"
he drags that same finger over you again, slower this time, teasing your entrance without dipping in. "you think i'm gonna be nice just because you're dripping?"
"you think this is a reward?"
he leans in again, breath hot against your ear. "you ran your mouth for an hour straight and now look at you." you whine when his finger grazes your clit, "bent over. shaking. soaked."
"like some needy little brat who doesn't even deserve to cum."
your stomach drops and then—he brushes your clit again.  once. light. barely enough to feel.
you gasp.
"yeah, that's what i thought." he smiles. "so easy." you try to push back into his hand, grinding subtly, desperate for more—he pulls away.
you whine and he laughs.
"no, no. don't get greedy." his chest hard against your back, "not after all that attitude."
you squeeze your eyes shut, frustration bubbling in your chest.
"say please," he murmurs.
you shake your head.
"say it."
silence.
so he grabs your ass again, spreading you open, gaze locked on your dripping cunt.
"fine," he huffs softly. "we'll just stay like this."
and he does.
he touches you again—light strokes, slow circles, never consistent. never deep, just enough to keep you right on the edge of madness. every time your hips roll back, he pulls away. every time your thighs twitch, he stills.
you're panting now, aching. begging in your head.
but he waits.
until your pride starts to crumble, voice shaking— "please..."
he hums. "hmm?"
"please," you whisper again. "touch me."
he cups you fully now, hot palm against your core, middle finger sliding in just enough to tease.
"so polite all of a sudden."
you squirm.
"you wanna cum?" he asks. "after all that attitude?"
you nod.
"you wanna get filled like the dumb little slut you've been acting like?"
your breath stutters.
"then you're gonna fucking earn it."
he pulls his hand away again and this time, you sob.
your legs are jelly and your arms are trembling. cunt aching. niki's hands have been everywhere—except where you need them. and you can't take it anymore.
you can't.
"please," you breathe. "please, ni-ki, i'll—i'll be good."
you feel him smile against your shoulder.
"no, you won't."
you whimper.
"you'll run your mouth again tomorrow." he knew you like the back of his hand, and he knew what he had to do to you.  "you'll tease. you'll provoke. you'll pretend like you didn't beg me to ruin you in the locker room."
his hand slides between your thighs again, two fingers pressing into you with no rhythm—just enough to make you feel how empty you still are.
"you'll pretend like you're not still dripping my cum when you get back in the water."
your eyes roll back.
"say you're sorry."
you swallow hard, "i'm sorry."
"say you need me."
"i—i need you."
"say who owns you."
you hesitate for half a second too long and he pulls away again.
"fuck—no, wait, wait—!"
but he steps back completely, hands off, voice dangerously low. "not good enough." he steps back and circles around, grabbing you by the hair.
not harsh, just final.
he pulls your head up, enough to get a better angle—then slides the tip of his cock across your lips causing you to gasp.
"you want something to say?" he murmurs, voice like silk. "say it around my dick."
you glare up at him, breathing hard. and then slowly, so slowly—you open your mouth.
he slides in.
the position's filthy. so filthy. bent at the waist, ass in the air, face tilted back and cock filling your mouth from above.
he doesn't rush.
just pushes deeper, slow and steady, until you're gagging—your throat tight, lips stretched, spit already dripping onto the bench beneath you.
"there she is," he breathes. "so fucking quiet all of a sudden."
his hand stays tight in your hair as he rocks his hips—grinding deep, letting you choke around him, then pulling back just enough to let you breathe.
"thought you were tough?" he pants, "thought you were better than me?" he thrusts again, deeper this time, and your knees buckle.
"what happened to all that attitude, baby?"
you whimper around him, mouth raw and wet and full. you're flushed and fucked out, and he hasn't even touched your pussy again yet.
"you like this, don't you?" he grunts when he feels you hollow out your cheeks, essentially vacuuming him in. "being used. being owned."
he slides out, dragging his cock across your swollen lips before slapping it against your tongue.
"tell me who you belong to."
you moan at his words and he smirks. "can't? that's alright."
"i'll fuck it into you instead."
he releases your hair and twists you around so he could grab your hips again—lining up behind you, cock wet and heavy with spit and arousal.
and that's what does it.
you hear the low rustle of him stroking himself behind you. hear the way his breathing shifts.
and then—you feel it.
the head of his cock nudging against your entrance, thick and hot and already leaking.
"shouldn't give brats what they beg for," he mutters. "makes 'em worse."
and then he pushes in, all at once.
you scream.
he groans low, hands locking around your hips, slamming in to the hilt with one hard, deep stroke that steals the air from your lungs.
"fuck—look at you." his eyes watching your ass meet his pelvis, "took it so easy. like you were made for it."
you can't think, can't breathe. he's so deep. too deep. and he's not stopping.
"you wanted a loser?" his voice drips venom. "losers don't fuck like this."
his hips snap into yours, slow and punishing. "losers don't make you this fucking full."
you choke on a moan. nails scraping the wood of the bench. every thrust makes your toes curl, your back arch—your body giving up and giving in.
he leans over you now, one hand gripping your jaw, forcing your head to tilt.
"you talk big," he pants. "but you melt the second i split you open."
his thumb pushes into your mouth and you suck without thinking, needy and broken and gone.
"such a fucking mouth on you," he growls. "but you're better like this."
"dumb. stuffed. obedient."
you moan around his thumb—whimpering, twitching, clenching around him so tight it punches a groan out of his chest.
"you gonna cum, baby?" he asks, voice sharp. "you gonna cream on my cock like a little fucking toy?"
you nod frantically. "yes—yes, please, please—"
"you gonna let me breed this pussy raw?" you clench around him even tighter at his filthy words.
"yes, yes—please, i need it—"
he removes his fingers from you mouth so he could grab your hips tighter and thrust harder. you scream, head falling forward, bench scraping beneath your chest as he fills you in one brutal stroke.
"fuck—niki—!"
"shut up."
he slams in again. "you got your mouth full once, you'll take it again." his cock drags deep and slow inside you, hips snapping with brutal precision—every thrust punching breath from your lungs.
"you're gonna take every inch." he snaps at you, his grip on you now bruising. "and you're gonna fucking thank me for it."
your mind blanks. body clenching around him, trying to pull him deeper even as your legs shake under the weight of it all.
he leans over you again, voice low in your ear. "say please."
"please—please, fuck, i'm sorry—"
"too late."
his hand wraps around your throat, just enough pressure to make you gasp. "you talk back, you get used."
"you run your mouth, and i'll fill every hole you got."
you cry out, overstimulated and aching and full. and still—he keeps going. he fucks you like he's marking you.
hips heavy against yours, cock driving in deep, over and over again—slick, raw, relentless. you're soaked and stretched and shaking, arms trembling from holding yourself up.
his grip doesn't waver.
one hand still on your throat, the other locked around your hip, guiding you back onto every punishing thrust like he's training you to take it.
"so quiet now," niki pants. "what happened, baby?"
you moan—a wrecked, breathless sound.
"that mouth kept running, but look at you now—" he pushes in deep and stays there.
you scream.
"just a fucktoy with nothing left to say."
you're too full and it aches in the best way. your pussy pulses around him, fluttering with each deep grind of his hips.
"you feel that?" he pulls back, just an inch—then slams in again, cock kissing your cervix.
"that's what happens when you bait me."
your legs buckle. niki catches you effortlessly—shifts his grip to your waist and fucks you through it, unbothered by your whimpering, your twitching, your begging.
"gonna fill this bratty little cunt," he groans. "make you carry something more permanent than a loss."
your eyes roll back.
"you want that?" he growls. "want my cum dripping out of you while you pretend you're not mine?"
"yes—yes, please—"
"fuck," he hisses, thrusts getting sharper. "you need it, don't you?"
"need it—need you to—fuck—please, ni-ki—" you babble mindlessly, to fucked out to realize what he was saying.
he grabs your hair again and pulls. your back arches. pussy clenches. he feels it.
"oh, you're gonna cum," he breathes. "and when you do? i'll be so deep in you, you'll feel it in your throat."
"you're gonna thank me for breeding this cunt."
you sob and then—you snap. you cum hard, mouth open in a silent cry, vision going white, body locking around him.
niki groans—low and guttural—and fucks you through it.
doesn't slow down.
doesn't stop.
"take it," he pants."take every fucking drop."
and then he cums—deep, deep, cock twitching inside you, his cum spilling thick and hot into your pulsing cunt.
"fuck—just like that—" he curses, eyes shutting. "that's it—good girl—fuck—mine."
you're gasping, shaking, ruined.
he stays there, buried deep. twitching.
his hands soften on your waist. you can feel him throbbing inside you, still filling you up, like he meant to breed you and make sure it stuck.
your mouth opens but no sound comes out.
he leans over your back, presses a kiss between your shoulders.
"what's wrong?" he murmurs. "nothing left to say?"
he grins.
"good." you're twitching underneath him. sweat-slicked, breathless, your arms collapsed beneath you. face pressed to the bench, legs spread open wide with niki's cum dripping hot and messy out of your ruined cunt.
you're wrecked, but he's still hard.
"you thought i was done?" he murmurs, almost amused. "baby, you haven't learned anything."
you whimper, trying to lift your head.
too slow.
he's already pushing back in—your cunt still fluttering, oversensitive, making it hurt in the most unbearable way.
"wait—wait, i can't—"
"you can."
his hands grip your hips again—tighter this time.
"and you will."
he fucks into you again, deep and slow, cock dragging against soaked walls that clench down like they're still desperate to keep him.
you scream.
your nails dig into the bench. your thighs shake violently, your cunt pulsing with the aftershocks of your last orgasm—and he's still going.
"this pussy's still so wet," he breathes. "can't decide if it's from me or from you."
he thrusts again, making you cry out.
"can't tell if you're begging me to stop—" he grunts "—or to never stop fucking you."
he leans over you, chest pressed to your back, lips brushing your ear. "you're leaking all over the bench, baby."
"do you even know how pretty you look like this?"
you sob.
he reaches around and slides his fingers between your thighs, spreads the cum that's dripping out, and spreading it over your clit.
"don't waste it," he murmurs. "you wanted it so bad, remember?"
your whole body jerks but he doesn't stop.
just keeps fucking you with long, punishing strokes—grinding against your swollen, overstimulated walls like he wants to split you open all over again.
"gonna give me another," he pants. "you can take it. i know you can."
"gonna come again on this cock while it's still leaking with my first load—"
you choke on a sob, thighs clenching, tears slipping down your cheeks.
"—and then you're gonna thank me."
"say thank you, baby."
you try but nothing comes out.
so he slaps your ass—just once, hard enough to sting—and fucks you harder.
"say it."
"thank you—thank you—fuck, niki, i—" your voice breaks again.
your body snaps and another orgasm rips through you—violent, uncontrollable, white-hot and unbearable—and your vision blacks out for a second from how hard you cum around him.
niki groans through clenched teeth, cock twitching again inside you, and his hand presses firm to your lower stomach. "fuck, baby," he breathes. "you're still so tight."
"how the fuck are you still squeezing me like this—?" he thrusts once more, deep, rough, unforgiving and then he cums again.
right on top of your second orgasm, flooding you for the second time, groaning through it while your whole body shakes beneath him.
it's too much. it's too much.
you're crying now, sobbing into the bench. stretched out, bred, stuffed so full his cum starts spilling out with every twitch of his cock.
and he still doesn't pull out.
"that's it," he whispers, soft now, pressing his lips to your shoulder. "that's what i wanted."
"fought me every second—but now look at you."
"fucked dumb and full of me."
you hiccup through a breath.
he smiles, "good girl."
you try to move. a soft, trembling shift of your hips—instinctual. desperate.
"n-no more—" your voice cracks, wrecked and raw, and your thighs twitch from the overwhelming stretch still seated inside you.
niki doesn't say anything at first. he just tightens his grip. his palm presses flat against the middle of your back, and he leans down, chest flush to your back, cock still buried deep in your overstimulated cunt.
you freeze.
"where do you think you're going?" he murmurs, voice low, calm, dark.
you squirm again when he grinds his hips.
slow. deep.
you whimper.
"you're not done." his voice dark, threatening "not even close." you sob into the bench, arms trembling beneath you.
"you're gonna stay right here," he continues, breathing hot against your ear, "and you're gonna keep my cum where it fucking belongs."
his hand slips down your spine again, trails between your legs.
he drags his fingers through the mess leaking out of you—hot, sticky, endless. "fuck, look at you."
"can't even hold it all in."
he pushes two fingers back in—shallow—and your body jolts. "stuffed full and still greedy."
"isn't this what you wanted?" his tone mocking. "to get bred like a dumb little cumdump?"
you cry out, body twitching, trying again to pull away—but his cock throbs inside you, and you clench.
he smirks, "oh, baby," he hums. "your pussy's telling on you." he rocks his hips—slow grind, barely any thrust, just a filthy roll of his cock that drags along every overstimulated nerve inside you.
"tight and messy," he groans. "still sucking me in like you belong to me."
he licks a stripe up your shoulder, lips curling into a grin. "you like being used, don't you?"
"getting put in your place. fucked until you cry," he cooed softly, your body twitching.
"you like being mine."
your breath stutters but he keeps going.
"say it," he growls, pushing deep again. "say you're mine."
"say this cunt's mine to use—mine to fill whenever i want. mine to leave leaking on this bench like a used little toy."
you choke on a sob.
"say it."
"yours," you whimper, voice thin and hoarse. "m'yours, niki—i'm yours—"
"damn right."
his hand fists in your hair again and he yanks your head back—gently, but possessive. you're wrecked. flushed, wet, glassy-eyed and ruined.
he kisses your jaw.
"look at you," he whispers. "you were so fucking mouthy an hour ago."
"now you're just a warm hole for me to use." his cock twitches inside you again and you clench, helpless and aching and dripping.
"you'll take me again when i'm ready," he adds, breath fanning hot across your ear, "and you'll cum again. harder this time."
"because this pussy is mine now." his voice low and menacing, "and you don't come unless i say so."
"understand?"
you nod, sobbing through it.
he smiles, "good girl."
he grinds in deeper, cock still rock hard, and wraps his arm fully around your waist to keep you there—locked in, stretched open, and completely owned.
you don't even realize he's moving again until his hands shift position—one locking around your waist, the other curling under your chin to tilt your head up.
his cock drags out of you just a few inches.
you flinch, "n-ni-ki—i can't—"
"yes," he snaps, quiet and sharp. "you can."
his voice is cold now. not angry—but final. "you wanted to run your mouth, brat," he growls.
"so now you'll take what comes with it."
you try to push up but he shoves you right back down."keep your ass up."
and you do—legs trembling, arms buckling beneath you, sobs already caught in your throat—because the tone in his voice says don't make me say it again.
and then, he fucks back in.
hard.no mercy.
your scream rips out of you, raw and shattered, because there's no build up this time. no warning. just him, full and brutal, fucking into your soaked, overstimulated cunt like it was made for this.
like you were made for him.
"gonna fuck you until you break," he snarls, hips slamming against your ass, cock dragging against your sore, cum-slick walls with every ruthless thrust.
"until your brain shuts off—until you forget anything but how full you are."
you cry into the bench and he grits his teeth. "how fucking owned you are."
he hits deeper, your whole body jolts.
"can't even push me out anymore, huh?" he seethes in your ear, "cunt's been fucked open so wide it needs me to stay."
your legs give out, but he doesn't let you fall, he holds you up. keeps your hips locked in place with bruising fingers and fucks you through it like he doesn't even hear your sobs anymore.
or maybe he does, and he likes them.
"this is what happens," he pants, breath hot and sharp against your back, "when you talk too much." he smacks your ass. "when you forget your place."
"now you know."
you try to answer but all that comes out is a gasping cry.
"that's right," he groans. "just cry, baby."
"cry while i fill you one more time."
and then he slams in—hard, deep, possessive—and groans through gritted teeth as he cums again inside you, cock twitching violently, cum spilling into your already wrecked pussy for the third time.
your cunt pulses. leaks. gapes. you fall limp beneath him. he stays in you for a long moment and lets it all sink in.
and then—he pulls out.
a broken moan escapes your throat. you feel it all rush out of you—hot, heavy, filthy—as his cum starts dripping out in thick streams, down your thighs, pooling under you on the bench.
you hear him exhale but you're too spent to even lift your head.
his hand ghosts across your ass one last time. not tender. not cruel.
just claiming.
"take the loss," he murmurs. "and clean yourself up."
and then—he walks away.
leaves you trembling. gaping. bred and ruined.
like a win was never even on the table.
— enjoy this fic? check out my other ones right here!
419 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 10 days ago
Text
the loss | nrk
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you push niki one too many times, and he fucks you on the bench—just to remind you that losers don’t get to walk away.
genre: rivals au
pairing: swimmer!niki x bratty!reader
warnings: porn w very little plot, bratty!reader, hard dom!niki, mean!niki, cornering, bantering, dub-con ish, degrading, forced submission, spanking, manhandling, oral (m. rec), hair pulling, chocking, unprotected p in v, breeding, creampie, multiple rounds, overstimulation, no after care whatsoever. i think that’s it….?
wc: 6.2k
a/n: back again with another porno…am i ashamed? slightly. i wanted to post something and this dynamic has been on my mind for a while.. yes i have like 2 other fics dying in my drafts that i have promised but baby that’s plot…this is porn. anyways…enjoy! as always, reblogs, notes and comments are always appreciated!
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
you'd noticed it from the first lap—niki was off today.
his strokes were sluggish, flip turns messy, timing just a split second late. not that he'd ever admit it. niki wasn't the kind of swimmer who made excuses, but the difference was obvious—and you weren't about to let it slide.
"what's wrong, golden boy?" you called from your lane, teeth flashing through the spray. "forgot how to swim?"
he didn't respond—just wiped the water from his eyes and pushed off again. but you caught the flick of his jaw, the twitch of his fingers as he adjusted his goggles. you were under his skin already, not that you didn't practically live there already.
perfect.
the two of you had been rivals since 1st year. different schools, same arena, always scheduled to practice back-to-back. you had similar event times, similar passions, and very different personalities.
you happened to be loud, cocky, relentless. whereas, niki was unreadable, quiet, but impossible to ignore.
the tension between you was legendary. not quite friendly, not quite hostile—just constant and sharp.
today, though, you could tell something was cracking.
practice was supposed to be a standard drill day, but your coach must've picked up on the tension, because halfway through he clapped his hands and smirked.
"how about some friendly races? we've got the lanes—let's make it fun."
fun.
as if you hadn't been dying to make niki eat your dust for years. he said nothing, just nodded and slid into the water beside you, shoulders tight, goggles already on. he didn't look at you once, and you scoffed at his cold demeanour.
the first race was a 100m free, you won by a body length.
the second was a medley sprint, you beat him again.
and by the third race—when you were practically bouncing with smug satisfaction—you leaned over the lane divider and said, just loud enough for him to hear: "kinda feels like bullying at this point."
he exhaled slowly. he didn't answer, didn't look up. but the tension in his arms, the way he adjusted his cap for the fifth time—it was all falling apart.
he was seething, and you loved it.
after the final cooldown lap, he climbed out without a word—grabbing his towel and heading straight for the locker room. no eye contact, no handshake, not even a grunt.
you waited exactly 30 seconds before following him in, still dripping, still grinning. you just couldn't help yourself, when it came to rubbing your victory in someone's face—you had no morals.
you step into the empty men's locker room with a cocky bounce in your step, towel slung around your neck, still soaked and grinning like the devil himself.
it's quiet inside—steam fogging the mirrors, a few lockers clanging shut in the distance. most of your team's still showering. his? already gone. it was a dry monday at the pool, people were quick to pack their belongings and leave.
except for him.
niki stands at the far end, back to you, towel around his waist, water dripping from his hair. shoulders flexing as he digs through his bag searching for his clothes.
you take your time walking over, "hey, sore loser."
he doesn't answer.
you hum, tapping a finger against the cold metal locker beside him, "what happened out there, huh?" you grinned, your plump lips bitten raw from the heavily chlorinated water.
"pretty sure your form fell apart after the 2nd lap." you then gasped mockingly, "don't tell me i made you nervous."
he moves like he's not listening—like he's too calm, too cool to care—but you see the way his jaw ticks.
you lean in, voice syrupy-sweet, "kinda embarrassing, right? the fastest guy on your team getting his ass handed to him by me?"
still nothing, he doesn't even look at you. just pulls out a dry shirt and drops it onto the bench.
you smirk, continuing, "you were supposed to be the golden boy." you desperately search his body for a reaction, "what, did the pressure finally get to you?"
you tilt your head, "or maybe i just fucked you up in the head a little. maybe that's why you can't swim straight—'cause every time i pass you, you get distracted watching my ass cut through the water."
that gets him. he still doesn't face you, but his fingers stop moving. still and stiff.
you press closer, letting your towel slip down just enough to bare your collarbone. you're dripping all over the tile, soaked swimsuit clinging to your skin. but you don't care, you've got him right where you want him.
or so you think. "but don't worry," you say, mock-sweet, "you still looked cute losing."
and then, finally—he turns. slowly, his eyes sweep over you once. grazing over your bare legs and your navy blue towel that clung to your form loosely and then back down from your smug mouth to the water sliding down your legs.
you're smiling when he steps forward, but it falters instantly when he doesn't stop. keeps walking until your back hits the solid green locker behind you.
"done?" he asks, voice low.
you blink. "...what?"
"talking," he says, like you were dumb. "are you done?"
you scoff, trying to roll your eyes, but you're caught off guard by how close he is—dripping wet, towering over you, and still too calm.
"you've got a lot of nerve talking the way you do," he says quietly, "for someone who couldn't even keep her thighs still when we swam next to each other last week."
your breath catches and your face heats instantly.
"you—"
"you think i didn't notice?" he leans in, voice steady. "i always notice."
you open your mouth but no sound comes out. and that's when his hand lifts—palm resting right beside your head, boxing you in.
"you walk around in that tiny swimsuit, mouthy as fuck, pushing every button like it won't come back to bite you."
"so tell me," he says, tilting his head so his blonde locks fell over his eyes, "what exactly were you hoping i'd do today?"
you stare, lips parted. because you're not so sure anymore. you thought you were pushing him, you thought you were in control.
but right now—pressed between cold metal and niki's steady, smoldering stare—you feel anything but in charge.
you don't usually lose control, not with him.
not with anyone.
you talk your shit, play the part, swim hard and leave people gasping in your wake—figuratively and literally. no one handles you. no one checks you.
but niki's not backing up and suddenly your back's to the lockers, heart pounding under your damp suit, mouth open and ready to fire—except nothing's coming out.
he watches you. quiet. eyes heavy-lidded. heat rolling off him in waves.
"what, no more comments?" he murmurs. "don't tell me you ran out."
you find your voice, barely, "just giving you time to come up with a decent excuse for choking out there."
his mouth twitches, but not quite into a smirk.
"right." he steps closer, towel loose around his hips. "then why are your legs shaking?"
you freeze, he looks down and you do too. your thighs—still wet, still dripping pool water—are trembling just the tiniest bit.
from exhaustion. from adrenaline. you tell yourself that's why.
his gaze lifts again and you hold it, stubborn.
"fuck off," you mutter.
he tilts his head, "i think you want the opposite."
and then—softly, like it costs him nothing—he presses his hand flat against the locker beside your head.
"you've been begging for my attention since the first time we swam next to each other," his eyes glare you down, his head tilting downwards so he could look you in the eyes.  "snapping at me. showing off. trying so hard to get under my skin."
his voice stays low, unreadable. "you don't hate me. you just don't know what to do with yourself when you're not the one in control."
your jaw tightens. "shut up."
"make me."
you suck in a breath and that's when he leans in—close enough that your noses almost touch, voice a dangerous whisper: "you keep running that bratty little mouth like you're not one second away from letting me shut it with my cock."
your body reacts, involuntarily.
heat shoots down your spine, and you shift without thinking—hips pressing forward just slightly, thighs brushing together.
he sees it, he definitely sees it. but he doesn't take the bait. instead, he pulls back a fraction, calm as ever.
"you wanted to win?" his voice gruff. "congrats. you beat me in the pool." he then pauses, the heat of his toned body causing your brain to malfunction momentarily, "but in here?" he glances around the empty locker room. "you don't stand a chance."
you grit your teeth. "you're bluffing."
he laughs—just once. low and sharp.
"baby," he says, so quietly you feel it in your bones, "you've been bluffing since the day we met."
you push him—hard, palms flat to his chest. "fuck you."
"you'd love to." and now he steps back. like he's giving you space. like he's letting you walk away. but the smirk that finally curves across his lips tells you exactly what he's doing.
he's letting you think you have a choice.
you hate the way your body reacts to him. the way your stomach dips when he gets close. the way your thighs ache from just a few low words.
you've been running your mouth all practice, and suddenly you're the one pressed against cold metal, caught in the middle of a storm you started—but now it's slipping through your fingers, fast.
no.
no way.
you're not letting this blonde bimbo fucking win like this.
so you do what you always do when the tension spikes and your pulse won't slow down: you get nasty.
you square your shoulders, push off the locker with a laugh that sounds just a little too forced.
"god, you're such a sore loser."
he raises a brow, still silent.
"it's actually kinda embarrassing," you add, tilting your head. "big strong ni-ki—talk of his team, always so serious—getting wrecked by a girl who's half his size."
your voice drips with mock pity, "what does that make you?" you pause to faux think for a second,  "a loser with a superiority complex?"
he blinks once, he doesn't flinch.
"or maybe you just choke when someone's actually better than you." you begin to jitter with each word that spews out of your mouth. "you gonna cry about it? or throw a tantrum in the showers where no one can see?"
still nothing and god, it infuriates you.
"go on. storm out like a little bitch again."
silence.
he just looks at you. dark eyes steady, unreadable.
you expect him to snap. bark something. shove you. anything.
instead? he steps in slow, close, deliberate and leans down until his lips brush your ear.
"done flailing?"
you stop breathing.
his voice is low, lethal, "you're not intimidating. you're not untouchable." he pauses,  "you're desperate."
your stomach drops.
"you want to pretend like all this—" his hand brushes the strap of your dark green swimsuit "—doesn't mean anything, but your body's telling the truth."
your pulse spikes, he knows it.
he tilts his head, still murmuring, still terrifyingly calm, "wanna keep lying? go ahead." he grins, a small laugh leaving his pink plump lips, "but the next time you open that smart mouth, you better be ready to pay for it."
he pulls back, eyes dropping to your lips. "and if you call me a loser again," he murmurs, "i'll fuck the attitude out of you."
your knees nearly give out, but he's not done.
"so go on. say something bratty," he says, like he's testing you. "give me a reason."
your throat tightens. you open your mouth— and nothing comes out. not a single word.
he smirks, finally. "that's what i thought."
you're burning.  every nerve on fire, skin prickling, heart racing like you're on the starting block—but there's no whistle. no gun. no escape.
and still—still—you can't shut up.
you're a brat down to the bone. and even with your knees weak and heat pooling between your legs, even with niki's breath still ghosting your skin, you can't let him walk away with the last word.
so you spit it out—sharp and venomous and a little shaky, "still doesn't change the fact that you lost."
his gaze lifts slowly.
"and no matter how smug you act, it must eat you alive knowing you'll never be as good as me."
his jaw flexes.
"you're just all talk, niki." you force another laugh, "all bark, no bite."
you pause and then smile, "and if i wanted someone to fuck me breathless?" your eyes glaze over his face, watching his jaw tick. "it sure as hell wouldn't be a guy who can't even keep up in the water."
the silence that follows is instant. thick.
and then— he laughs.
low. humorless. dangerous.
"alright."
your stomach flips at the sound, you felt yourself gush.
he drops the towel from his hips. your breath catches—eyes flashing down without thinking—and he sees it. sees the way your gaze sticks, the way your lips part.
he steps forward, grabs your chin, his fingers firm but not cruel—and tilts your head up to look at him.
"you wanted to mouth off one more time?" he raises an eyebrow.  "go ahead. just remember—this is what you asked for."
his hand drops. "bend over the bench."
you freeze and blink.
"w-what?"
he doesn't repeat himself. doesn't need to. his eyes are heavy and unblinking, voice steady, "you're not walking out of this room without being reminded who you belong to."
and then, "and when i'm done, you're going to thank me for ruining you."
you don't move.
he told you to bend over the bench, and you're still standing there—defiant, knees wobbly, throat dry, but still trying to glare at him like he didn't just peel every inch of power off you like a second skin.
he notices, of fucking course he does.
niki's always been good at seeing straight through your bullshit. today, he's done letting you hide behind it.
he steps forward—slow, steady—and you catch the brief flick of heat in his eyes as he looks you up and down. like he's deciding how to start.
"you think you're clever, huh?"
you scoff, but it's weak.
his hand lifts—trailing fingertips along the line of your arm, down the damp curve of your side. he doesn't touch anywhere dangerous, he doesn't give you what you want.
and that's exactly what drives you insane.
"you talk a big game," he murmurs, "but your body's already begging."
you open your mouth to argue—and then gasp when his knuckle grazes the hem of your suit.
"shaking." his fingers slide down the inside of your thigh, barely a whisper. "dripping." he leans in, "and not from the pool."
you stiffen, teeth clenched.
"say it," he whispers. "you want it."
you glare, "go to hell."
he smiles, "ladies first."
and then—he moves behind you. hands settling at your hips, thumbs dipping beneath the band of your suit. he doesn't yank it off. doesn't rush. he just holds you there.
"you know what the problem is?" he says softly. "you've never had someone fuck you like they mean it."
your stomach flips.
"you push and push, trying to find the edge, hoping someone grabs you before you fall off." his breath is warm against your neck. his voice stays steady, "and now you have."
he peels the suit down slowly, agonizingly slow—until it clings to your thighs, slick and wet. you were exposed, your breasts and cunt on full display.
you could feel him, his cock thick and heavy against your back.  you suck in a breath.
he traces one hand up the back of your leg, stopping at the dip of your lower back.
"bend over."
you don't. not yet.
"make me," you whisper, voice cracking just a little.
he hums, "i will."
and then—finally—his palm lands on your ass in one sharp, controlled slap. not hard enough to hurt. just enough to steal the air from your lungs.
"last warning," he says. "next time you talk back, i won't be so nice."
you swallow hard.
and slowly, trembling, you fold over the bench.
he lets the silence stretch. lets you sit there, exposed and tense, pride crumbling by the second.
then you feel his hand again—this time between your thighs, knuckles brushing your heat.
"look at you." he chuckles darkly, "still pretending you're not dripping for me."
you whimper and he still hasn't even taken his time with you yet.
your cheek's pressed to the cold bench now, legs trembling. arms burning. swimsuit halfway down your thighs and niki behind you—silent for a moment, watching.
you hate that your body's already arching toward him, hips twitching like you're searching for friction. you hate that he hasn't even really touched you yet, and your skin still feels like it's going to ignite.
he drags one finger through your folds. slow. careful. barely any pressure.
and then clicks his tongue, "messy."
you stiffen.
"this wet over a couple words?" he laughs tauntingly, "i didn't even do anything yet."
you hiss through your teeth, "fuck you."
he laughs, low and sharp, "you really don't learn, do you?"
he drags that same finger over you again, slower this time, teasing your entrance without dipping in. "you think i'm gonna be nice just because you're dripping?"
"you think this is a reward?"
he leans in again, breath hot against your ear. "you ran your mouth for an hour straight and now look at you." you whine when his finger grazes your clit, "bent over. shaking. soaked."
"like some needy little brat who doesn't even deserve to cum."
your stomach drops and then—he brushes your clit again.  once. light. barely enough to feel.
you gasp.
"yeah, that's what i thought." he smiles. "so easy." you try to push back into his hand, grinding subtly, desperate for more—he pulls away.
you whine and he laughs.
"no, no. don't get greedy." his chest hard against your back, "not after all that attitude."
you squeeze your eyes shut, frustration bubbling in your chest.
"say please," he murmurs.
you shake your head.
"say it."
silence.
so he grabs your ass again, spreading you open, gaze locked on your dripping cunt.
"fine," he huffs softly. "we'll just stay like this."
and he does.
he touches you again—light strokes, slow circles, never consistent. never deep, just enough to keep you right on the edge of madness. every time your hips roll back, he pulls away. every time your thighs twitch, he stills.
you're panting now, aching. begging in your head.
but he waits.
until your pride starts to crumble, voice shaking— "please..."
he hums. "hmm?"
"please," you whisper again. "touch me."
he cups you fully now, hot palm against your core, middle finger sliding in just enough to tease.
"so polite all of a sudden."
you squirm.
"you wanna cum?" he asks. "after all that attitude?"
you nod.
"you wanna get filled like the dumb little slut you've been acting like?"
your breath stutters.
"then you're gonna fucking earn it."
he pulls his hand away again and this time, you sob.
your legs are jelly and your arms are trembling. cunt aching. niki's hands have been everywhere—except where you need them. and you can't take it anymore.
you can't.
"please," you breathe. "please, ni-ki, i'll—i'll be good."
you feel him smile against your shoulder.
"no, you won't."
you whimper.
"you'll run your mouth again tomorrow." he knew you like the back of his hand, and he knew what he had to do to you.  "you'll tease. you'll provoke. you'll pretend like you didn't beg me to ruin you in the locker room."
his hand slides between your thighs again, two fingers pressing into you with no rhythm—just enough to make you feel how empty you still are.
"you'll pretend like you're not still dripping my cum when you get back in the water."
your eyes roll back.
"say you're sorry."
you swallow hard, "i'm sorry."
"say you need me."
"i—i need you."
"say who owns you."
you hesitate for half a second too long and he pulls away again.
"fuck—no, wait, wait—!"
but he steps back completely, hands off, voice dangerously low. "not good enough." he steps back and circles around, grabbing you by the hair.
not harsh, just final.
he pulls your head up, enough to get a better angle—then slides the tip of his cock across your lips causing you to gasp.
"you want something to say?" he murmurs, voice like silk. "say it around my dick."
you glare up at him, breathing hard. and then slowly, so slowly—you open your mouth.
he slides in.
the position's filthy. so filthy. bent at the waist, ass in the air, face tilted back and cock filling your mouth from above.
he doesn't rush.
just pushes deeper, slow and steady, until you're gagging—your throat tight, lips stretched, spit already dripping onto the bench beneath you.
"there she is," he breathes. "so fucking quiet all of a sudden."
his hand stays tight in your hair as he rocks his hips—grinding deep, letting you choke around him, then pulling back just enough to let you breathe.
"thought you were tough?" he pants, "thought you were better than me?" he thrusts again, deeper this time, and your knees buckle.
"what happened to all that attitude, baby?"
you whimper around him, mouth raw and wet and full. you're flushed and fucked out, and he hasn't even touched your pussy again yet.
"you like this, don't you?" he grunts when he feels you hollow out your cheeks, essentially vacuuming him in. "being used. being owned."
he slides out, dragging his cock across your swollen lips before slapping it against your tongue.
"tell me who you belong to."
you moan at his words and he smirks. "can't? that's alright."
"i'll fuck it into you instead."
he releases your hair and twists you around so he could grab your hips again—lining up behind you, cock wet and heavy with spit and arousal.
and that's what does it.
you hear the low rustle of him stroking himself behind you. hear the way his breathing shifts.
and then—you feel it.
the head of his cock nudging against your entrance, thick and hot and already leaking.
"shouldn't give brats what they beg for," he mutters. "makes 'em worse."
and then he pushes in, all at once.
you scream.
he groans low, hands locking around your hips, slamming in to the hilt with one hard, deep stroke that steals the air from your lungs.
"fuck—look at you." his eyes watching your ass meet his pelvis, "took it so easy. like you were made for it."
you can't think, can't breathe. he's so deep. too deep. and he's not stopping.
"you wanted a loser?" his voice drips venom. "losers don't fuck like this."
his hips snap into yours, slow and punishing. "losers don't make you this fucking full."
you choke on a moan. nails scraping the wood of the bench. every thrust makes your toes curl, your back arch—your body giving up and giving in.
he leans over you now, one hand gripping your jaw, forcing your head to tilt.
"you talk big," he pants. "but you melt the second i split you open."
his thumb pushes into your mouth and you suck without thinking, needy and broken and gone.
"such a fucking mouth on you," he growls. "but you're better like this."
"dumb. stuffed. obedient."
you moan around his thumb—whimpering, twitching, clenching around him so tight it punches a groan out of his chest.
"you gonna cum, baby?" he asks, voice sharp. "you gonna cream on my cock like a little fucking toy?"
you nod frantically. "yes—yes, please, please—"
"you gonna let me breed this pussy raw?" you clench around him even tighter at his filthy words.
"yes, yes—please, i need it—"
he removes his fingers from you mouth so he could grab your hips tighter and thrust harder. you scream, head falling forward, bench scraping beneath your chest as he fills you in one brutal stroke.
"fuck—niki—!"
"shut up."
he slams in again. "you got your mouth full once, you'll take it again." his cock drags deep and slow inside you, hips snapping with brutal precision—every thrust punching breath from your lungs.
"you're gonna take every inch." he snaps at you, his grip on you now bruising. "and you're gonna fucking thank me for it."
your mind blanks. body clenching around him, trying to pull him deeper even as your legs shake under the weight of it all.
he leans over you again, voice low in your ear. "say please."
"please—please, fuck, i'm sorry—"
"too late."
his hand wraps around your throat, just enough pressure to make you gasp. "you talk back, you get used."
"you run your mouth, and i'll fill every hole you got."
you cry out, overstimulated and aching and full. and still—he keeps going. he fucks you like he's marking you.
hips heavy against yours, cock driving in deep, over and over again—slick, raw, relentless. you're soaked and stretched and shaking, arms trembling from holding yourself up.
his grip doesn't waver.
one hand still on your throat, the other locked around your hip, guiding you back onto every punishing thrust like he's training you to take it.
"so quiet now," niki pants. "what happened, baby?"
you moan—a wrecked, breathless sound.
"that mouth kept running, but look at you now—" he pushes in deep and stays there.
you scream.
"just a fucktoy with nothing left to say."
you're too full and it aches in the best way. your pussy pulses around him, fluttering with each deep grind of his hips.
"you feel that?" he pulls back, just an inch—then slams in again, cock kissing your cervix.
"that's what happens when you bait me."
your legs buckle. niki catches you effortlessly—shifts his grip to your waist and fucks you through it, unbothered by your whimpering, your twitching, your begging.
"gonna fill this bratty little cunt," he groans. "make you carry something more permanent than a loss."
your eyes roll back.
"you want that?" he growls. "want my cum dripping out of you while you pretend you're not mine?"
"yes—yes, please—"
"fuck," he hisses, thrusts getting sharper. "you need it, don't you?"
"need it—need you to—fuck—please, ni-ki—" you babble mindlessly, to fucked out to realize what he was saying.
he grabs your hair again and pulls. your back arches. pussy clenches. he feels it.
"oh, you're gonna cum," he breathes. "and when you do? i'll be so deep in you, you'll feel it in your throat."
"you're gonna thank me for breeding this cunt."
you sob and then—you snap. you cum hard, mouth open in a silent cry, vision going white, body locking around him.
niki groans—low and guttural—and fucks you through it.
doesn't slow down.
doesn't stop.
"take it," he pants."take every fucking drop."
and then he cums—deep, deep, cock twitching inside you, his cum spilling thick and hot into your pulsing cunt.
"fuck—just like that—" he curses, eyes shutting. "that's it—good girl—fuck—mine."
you're gasping, shaking, ruined.
he stays there, buried deep. twitching.
his hands soften on your waist. you can feel him throbbing inside you, still filling you up, like he meant to breed you and make sure it stuck.
your mouth opens but no sound comes out.
he leans over your back, presses a kiss between your shoulders.
"what's wrong?" he murmurs. "nothing left to say?"
he grins.
"good." you're twitching underneath him. sweat-slicked, breathless, your arms collapsed beneath you. face pressed to the bench, legs spread open wide with niki's cum dripping hot and messy out of your ruined cunt.
you're wrecked, but he's still hard.
"you thought i was done?" he murmurs, almost amused. "baby, you haven't learned anything."
you whimper, trying to lift your head.
too slow.
he's already pushing back in—your cunt still fluttering, oversensitive, making it hurt in the most unbearable way.
"wait—wait, i can't—"
"you can."
his hands grip your hips again—tighter this time.
"and you will."
he fucks into you again, deep and slow, cock dragging against soaked walls that clench down like they're still desperate to keep him.
you scream.
your nails dig into the bench. your thighs shake violently, your cunt pulsing with the aftershocks of your last orgasm—and he's still going.
"this pussy's still so wet," he breathes. "can't decide if it's from me or from you."
he thrusts again, making you cry out.
"can't tell if you're begging me to stop—" he grunts "—or to never stop fucking you."
he leans over you, chest pressed to your back, lips brushing your ear. "you're leaking all over the bench, baby."
"do you even know how pretty you look like this?"
you sob.
he reaches around and slides his fingers between your thighs, spreads the cum that's dripping out, and spreading it over your clit.
"don't waste it," he murmurs. "you wanted it so bad, remember?"
your whole body jerks but he doesn't stop.
just keeps fucking you with long, punishing strokes—grinding against your swollen, overstimulated walls like he wants to split you open all over again.
"gonna give me another," he pants. "you can take it. i know you can."
"gonna come again on this cock while it's still leaking with my first load—"
you choke on a sob, thighs clenching, tears slipping down your cheeks.
"—and then you're gonna thank me."
"say thank you, baby."
you try but nothing comes out.
so he slaps your ass—just once, hard enough to sting—and fucks you harder.
"say it."
"thank you—thank you—fuck, niki, i—" your voice breaks again.
your body snaps and another orgasm rips through you—violent, uncontrollable, white-hot and unbearable—and your vision blacks out for a second from how hard you cum around him.
niki groans through clenched teeth, cock twitching again inside you, and his hand presses firm to your lower stomach. "fuck, baby," he breathes. "you're still so tight."
"how the fuck are you still squeezing me like this—?" he thrusts once more, deep, rough, unforgiving and then he cums again.
right on top of your second orgasm, flooding you for the second time, groaning through it while your whole body shakes beneath him.
it's too much. it's too much.
you're crying now, sobbing into the bench. stretched out, bred, stuffed so full his cum starts spilling out with every twitch of his cock.
and he still doesn't pull out.
"that's it," he whispers, soft now, pressing his lips to your shoulder. "that's what i wanted."
"fought me every second—but now look at you."
"fucked dumb and full of me."
you hiccup through a breath.
he smiles, "good girl."
you try to move. a soft, trembling shift of your hips—instinctual. desperate.
"n-no more—" your voice cracks, wrecked and raw, and your thighs twitch from the overwhelming stretch still seated inside you.
niki doesn't say anything at first. he just tightens his grip. his palm presses flat against the middle of your back, and he leans down, chest flush to your back, cock still buried deep in your overstimulated cunt.
you freeze.
"where do you think you're going?" he murmurs, voice low, calm, dark.
you squirm again when he grinds his hips.
slow. deep.
you whimper.
"you're not done." his voice dark, threatening "not even close." you sob into the bench, arms trembling beneath you.
"you're gonna stay right here," he continues, breathing hot against your ear, "and you're gonna keep my cum where it fucking belongs."
his hand slips down your spine again, trails between your legs.
he drags his fingers through the mess leaking out of you—hot, sticky, endless. "fuck, look at you."
"can't even hold it all in."
he pushes two fingers back in—shallow—and your body jolts. "stuffed full and still greedy."
"isn't this what you wanted?" his tone mocking. "to get bred like a dumb little cumdump?"
you cry out, body twitching, trying again to pull away—but his cock throbs inside you, and you clench.
he smirks, "oh, baby," he hums. "your pussy's telling on you." he rocks his hips—slow grind, barely any thrust, just a filthy roll of his cock that drags along every overstimulated nerve inside you.
"tight and messy," he groans. "still sucking me in like you belong to me."
he licks a stripe up your shoulder, lips curling into a grin. "you like being used, don't you?"
"getting put in your place. fucked until you cry," he cooed softly, your body twitching.
"you like being mine."
your breath stutters but he keeps going.
"say it," he growls, pushing deep again. "say you're mine."
"say this cunt's mine to use—mine to fill whenever i want. mine to leave leaking on this bench like a used little toy."
you choke on a sob.
"say it."
"yours," you whimper, voice thin and hoarse. "m'yours, niki—i'm yours—"
"damn right."
his hand fists in your hair again and he yanks your head back—gently, but possessive. you're wrecked. flushed, wet, glassy-eyed and ruined.
he kisses your jaw.
"look at you," he whispers. "you were so fucking mouthy an hour ago."
"now you're just a warm hole for me to use." his cock twitches inside you again and you clench, helpless and aching and dripping.
"you'll take me again when i'm ready," he adds, breath fanning hot across your ear, "and you'll cum again. harder this time."
"because this pussy is mine now." his voice low and menacing, "and you don't come unless i say so."
"understand?"
you nod, sobbing through it.
he smiles, "good girl."
he grinds in deeper, cock still rock hard, and wraps his arm fully around your waist to keep you there—locked in, stretched open, and completely owned.
you don't even realize he's moving again until his hands shift position—one locking around your waist, the other curling under your chin to tilt your head up.
his cock drags out of you just a few inches.
you flinch, "n-ni-ki—i can't—"
"yes," he snaps, quiet and sharp. "you can."
his voice is cold now. not angry—but final. "you wanted to run your mouth, brat," he growls.
"so now you'll take what comes with it."
you try to push up but he shoves you right back down."keep your ass up."
and you do—legs trembling, arms buckling beneath you, sobs already caught in your throat—because the tone in his voice says don't make me say it again.
and then, he fucks back in.
hard.no mercy.
your scream rips out of you, raw and shattered, because there's no build up this time. no warning. just him, full and brutal, fucking into your soaked, overstimulated cunt like it was made for this.
like you were made for him.
"gonna fuck you until you break," he snarls, hips slamming against your ass, cock dragging against your sore, cum-slick walls with every ruthless thrust.
"until your brain shuts off—until you forget anything but how full you are."
you cry into the bench and he grits his teeth. "how fucking owned you are."
he hits deeper, your whole body jolts.
"can't even push me out anymore, huh?" he seethes in your ear, "cunt's been fucked open so wide it needs me to stay."
your legs give out, but he doesn't let you fall, he holds you up. keeps your hips locked in place with bruising fingers and fucks you through it like he doesn't even hear your sobs anymore.
or maybe he does, and he likes them.
"this is what happens," he pants, breath hot and sharp against your back, "when you talk too much." he smacks your ass. "when you forget your place."
"now you know."
you try to answer but all that comes out is a gasping cry.
"that's right," he groans. "just cry, baby."
"cry while i fill you one more time."
and then he slams in—hard, deep, possessive—and groans through gritted teeth as he cums again inside you, cock twitching violently, cum spilling into your already wrecked pussy for the third time.
your cunt pulses. leaks. gapes. you fall limp beneath him. he stays in you for a long moment and lets it all sink in.
and then—he pulls out.
a broken moan escapes your throat. you feel it all rush out of you—hot, heavy, filthy—as his cum starts dripping out in thick streams, down your thighs, pooling under you on the bench.
you hear him exhale but you're too spent to even lift your head.
his hand ghosts across your ass one last time. not tender. not cruel.
just claiming.
"take the loss," he murmurs. "and clean yourself up."
and then—he walks away.
leaves you trembling. gaping. bred and ruined.
like a win was never even on the table.
— enjoy this fic? check out my other ones right here!
419 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 12 days ago
Note
BAEEEEE YOU CAAMEEEE OMMGGGG HIII😭💗 i've missed my girl
-🐶
AHHHHHH im not back for long:( just checking up once and a while. hope you’re doing well <333
0 notes
jaysbaefie · 12 days ago
Note
saw you first was so good wow 😭 i’ve never been so entertained by a fic you truly have a talent & gift never stop writing pls
thank you so much!! i was iffy about the plot as it went on because my original wc was only supposed to be like 12k…but im so glad you enjoyed!! mwah
0 notes
jaysbaefie · 12 days ago
Note
ur sooo amazing! i loved saw u first! i love how you brought that story to life. like you could really feel the emotion when reading, but besides that. what's ur favorite song in desire unleashed?
thank you!! my favourite song is definitely helium!!
1 note · View note
jaysbaefie · 12 days ago
Note
SAW U FIRST WAS SO GOOODDDDDDD OMG
THANK YOU!! i’m so glad you enjoyed!!
0 notes
jaysbaefie · 12 days ago
Note
congrats and good luck on your job big girl🫶🏻 go easy on yourself and try to stay healthy during these busy days of yours. ily!!💗
-🐶
thank you!! i’m trying but 40 hour weeks plus school ain’t easy..ilyt cutie <333
1 note · View note
jaysbaefie · 12 days ago
Note
i realized i haven't written here today, so hiii!! i've been writing here per day for two weeks now and i've decided to set an emoji for myself (yk just to let you know who ur no1 fan is🙈) ILY💗
-🐶
hehe ILYT!! thank you for the support !!
0 notes
jaysbaefie · 12 days ago
Note
OMFG THAT JUNGWON FIC, GET THE FUCK OUT OMG I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO CREEPED OUT, SCARED, SURPRISED, AND TURNED ON—ALL AT THE SAME TIME FOR A FIC????? AND IT FITS HIM SOSOSO PERFECTLY LIKE??? AND I LOVE THE FACT THAT HE WASN'T A TYPICAL STEREOTYPE OF A YANDERE.
I LOVE IT SO MUCH AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 😭😭 YOURE SO TALENTED. YOU WRITE SO WELL. NEVER STOP WRITING. MWAH 💕
OMG THANK YOU !! i’m sorry i got to this so late
:( i’m so glad you enjoyed <333
2 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 13 days ago
Text
the loss | nrk
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you push niki one too many times, and he fucks you on the bench—just to remind you that losers don’t get to walk away.
genre: rivals au
pairing: swimmer!niki x bratty!reader
warnings: porn w very little plot, bratty!reader, hard dom!niki, mean!niki, cornering, bantering, dub-con ish, degrading, forced submission, spanking, manhandling, oral (m. rec), hair pulling, chocking, unprotected p in v, breeding, creampie, multiple rounds, overstimulation, no after care whatsoever. i think that’s it….?
wc: 6.2k
a/n: back again with another porno…am i ashamed? slightly. i wanted to post something and this dynamic has been on my mind for a while.. yes i have like 2 other fics dying in my drafts that i have promised but baby that’s plot…this is porn. anyways…enjoy! as always, reblogs, notes and comments are always appreciated!
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
you'd noticed it from the first lap—niki was off today.
his strokes were sluggish, flip turns messy, timing just a split second late. not that he'd ever admit it. niki wasn't the kind of swimmer who made excuses, but the difference was obvious—and you weren't about to let it slide.
"what's wrong, golden boy?" you called from your lane, teeth flashing through the spray. "forgot how to swim?"
he didn't respond—just wiped the water from his eyes and pushed off again. but you caught the flick of his jaw, the twitch of his fingers as he adjusted his goggles. you were under his skin already, not that you didn't practically live there already.
perfect.
the two of you had been rivals since 1st year. different schools, same arena, always scheduled to practice back-to-back. you had similar event times, similar passions, and very different personalities.
you happened to be loud, cocky, relentless. whereas, niki was unreadable, quiet, but impossible to ignore.
the tension between you was legendary. not quite friendly, not quite hostile—just constant and sharp.
today, though, you could tell something was cracking.
practice was supposed to be a standard drill day, but your coach must've picked up on the tension, because halfway through he clapped his hands and smirked.
"how about some friendly races? we've got the lanes—let's make it fun."
fun.
as if you hadn't been dying to make niki eat your dust for years. he said nothing, just nodded and slid into the water beside you, shoulders tight, goggles already on. he didn't look at you once, and you scoffed at his cold demeanour.
the first race was a 100m free, you won by a body length.
the second was a medley sprint, you beat him again.
and by the third race—when you were practically bouncing with smug satisfaction—you leaned over the lane divider and said, just loud enough for him to hear: "kinda feels like bullying at this point."
he exhaled slowly. he didn't answer, didn't look up. but the tension in his arms, the way he adjusted his cap for the fifth time—it was all falling apart.
he was seething, and you loved it.
after the final cooldown lap, he climbed out without a word—grabbing his towel and heading straight for the locker room. no eye contact, no handshake, not even a grunt.
you waited exactly 30 seconds before following him in, still dripping, still grinning. you just couldn't help yourself, when it came to rubbing your victory in someone's face—you had no morals.
you step into the empty men's locker room with a cocky bounce in your step, towel slung around your neck, still soaked and grinning like the devil himself.
it's quiet inside—steam fogging the mirrors, a few lockers clanging shut in the distance. most of your team's still showering. his? already gone. it was a dry monday at the pool, people were quick to pack their belongings and leave.
except for him.
niki stands at the far end, back to you, towel around his waist, water dripping from his hair. shoulders flexing as he digs through his bag searching for his clothes.
you take your time walking over, "hey, sore loser."
he doesn't answer.
you hum, tapping a finger against the cold metal locker beside him, "what happened out there, huh?" you grinned, your plump lips bitten raw from the heavily chlorinated water.
"pretty sure your form fell apart after the 2nd lap." you then gasped mockingly, "don't tell me i made you nervous."
he moves like he's not listening—like he's too calm, too cool to care—but you see the way his jaw ticks.
you lean in, voice syrupy-sweet, "kinda embarrassing, right? the fastest guy on your team getting his ass handed to him by me?"
still nothing, he doesn't even look at you. just pulls out a dry shirt and drops it onto the bench.
you smirk, continuing, "you were supposed to be the golden boy." you desperately search his body for a reaction, "what, did the pressure finally get to you?"
you tilt your head, "or maybe i just fucked you up in the head a little. maybe that's why you can't swim straight—'cause every time i pass you, you get distracted watching my ass cut through the water."
that gets him. he still doesn't face you, but his fingers stop moving. still and stiff.
you press closer, letting your towel slip down just enough to bare your collarbone. you're dripping all over the tile, soaked swimsuit clinging to your skin. but you don't care, you've got him right where you want him.
or so you think. "but don't worry," you say, mock-sweet, "you still looked cute losing."
and then, finally—he turns. slowly, his eyes sweep over you once. grazing over your bare legs and your navy blue towel that clung to your form loosely and then back down from your smug mouth to the water sliding down your legs.
you're smiling when he steps forward, but it falters instantly when he doesn't stop. keeps walking until your back hits the solid green locker behind you.
"done?" he asks, voice low.
you blink. "...what?"
"talking," he says, like you were dumb. "are you done?"
you scoff, trying to roll your eyes, but you're caught off guard by how close he is—dripping wet, towering over you, and still too calm.
"you've got a lot of nerve talking the way you do," he says quietly, "for someone who couldn't even keep her thighs still when we swam next to each other last week."
your breath catches and your face heats instantly.
"you—"
"you think i didn't notice?" he leans in, voice steady. "i always notice."
you open your mouth but no sound comes out. and that's when his hand lifts—palm resting right beside your head, boxing you in.
"you walk around in that tiny swimsuit, mouthy as fuck, pushing every button like it won't come back to bite you."
"so tell me," he says, tilting his head so his blonde locks fell over his eyes, "what exactly were you hoping i'd do today?"
you stare, lips parted. because you're not so sure anymore. you thought you were pushing him, you thought you were in control.
but right now—pressed between cold metal and niki's steady, smoldering stare—you feel anything but in charge.
you don't usually lose control, not with him.
not with anyone.
you talk your shit, play the part, swim hard and leave people gasping in your wake—figuratively and literally. no one handles you. no one checks you.
but niki's not backing up and suddenly your back's to the lockers, heart pounding under your damp suit, mouth open and ready to fire—except nothing's coming out.
he watches you. quiet. eyes heavy-lidded. heat rolling off him in waves.
"what, no more comments?" he murmurs. "don't tell me you ran out."
you find your voice, barely, "just giving you time to come up with a decent excuse for choking out there."
his mouth twitches, but not quite into a smirk.
"right." he steps closer, towel loose around his hips. "then why are your legs shaking?"
you freeze, he looks down and you do too. your thighs—still wet, still dripping pool water—are trembling just the tiniest bit.
from exhaustion. from adrenaline. you tell yourself that's why.
his gaze lifts again and you hold it, stubborn.
"fuck off," you mutter.
he tilts his head, "i think you want the opposite."
and then—softly, like it costs him nothing—he presses his hand flat against the locker beside your head.
"you've been begging for my attention since the first time we swam next to each other," his eyes glare you down, his head tilting downwards so he could look you in the eyes.  "snapping at me. showing off. trying so hard to get under my skin."
his voice stays low, unreadable. "you don't hate me. you just don't know what to do with yourself when you're not the one in control."
your jaw tightens. "shut up."
"make me."
you suck in a breath and that's when he leans in—close enough that your noses almost touch, voice a dangerous whisper: "you keep running that bratty little mouth like you're not one second away from letting me shut it with my cock."
your body reacts, involuntarily.
heat shoots down your spine, and you shift without thinking—hips pressing forward just slightly, thighs brushing together.
he sees it, he definitely sees it. but he doesn't take the bait. instead, he pulls back a fraction, calm as ever.
"you wanted to win?" his voice gruff. "congrats. you beat me in the pool." he then pauses, the heat of his toned body causing your brain to malfunction momentarily, "but in here?" he glances around the empty locker room. "you don't stand a chance."
you grit your teeth. "you're bluffing."
he laughs—just once. low and sharp.
"baby," he says, so quietly you feel it in your bones, "you've been bluffing since the day we met."
you push him—hard, palms flat to his chest. "fuck you."
"you'd love to." and now he steps back. like he's giving you space. like he's letting you walk away. but the smirk that finally curves across his lips tells you exactly what he's doing.
he's letting you think you have a choice.
you hate the way your body reacts to him. the way your stomach dips when he gets close. the way your thighs ache from just a few low words.
you've been running your mouth all practice, and suddenly you're the one pressed against cold metal, caught in the middle of a storm you started—but now it's slipping through your fingers, fast.
no.
no way.
you're not letting this blonde bimbo fucking win like this.
so you do what you always do when the tension spikes and your pulse won't slow down: you get nasty.
you square your shoulders, push off the locker with a laugh that sounds just a little too forced.
"god, you're such a sore loser."
he raises a brow, still silent.
"it's actually kinda embarrassing," you add, tilting your head. "big strong ni-ki—talk of his team, always so serious—getting wrecked by a girl who's half his size."
your voice drips with mock pity, "what does that make you?" you pause to faux think for a second,  "a loser with a superiority complex?"
he blinks once, he doesn't flinch.
"or maybe you just choke when someone's actually better than you." you begin to jitter with each word that spews out of your mouth. "you gonna cry about it? or throw a tantrum in the showers where no one can see?"
still nothing and god, it infuriates you.
"go on. storm out like a little bitch again."
silence.
he just looks at you. dark eyes steady, unreadable.
you expect him to snap. bark something. shove you. anything.
instead? he steps in slow, close, deliberate and leans down until his lips brush your ear.
"done flailing?"
you stop breathing.
his voice is low, lethal, "you're not intimidating. you're not untouchable." he pauses,  "you're desperate."
your stomach drops.
"you want to pretend like all this—" his hand brushes the strap of your dark green swimsuit "—doesn't mean anything, but your body's telling the truth."
your pulse spikes, he knows it.
he tilts his head, still murmuring, still terrifyingly calm, "wanna keep lying? go ahead." he grins, a small laugh leaving his pink plump lips, "but the next time you open that smart mouth, you better be ready to pay for it."
he pulls back, eyes dropping to your lips. "and if you call me a loser again," he murmurs, "i'll fuck the attitude out of you."
your knees nearly give out, but he's not done.
"so go on. say something bratty," he says, like he's testing you. "give me a reason."
your throat tightens. you open your mouth— and nothing comes out. not a single word.
he smirks, finally. "that's what i thought."
you're burning.  every nerve on fire, skin prickling, heart racing like you're on the starting block—but there's no whistle. no gun. no escape.
and still—still—you can't shut up.
you're a brat down to the bone. and even with your knees weak and heat pooling between your legs, even with niki's breath still ghosting your skin, you can't let him walk away with the last word.
so you spit it out—sharp and venomous and a little shaky, "still doesn't change the fact that you lost."
his gaze lifts slowly.
"and no matter how smug you act, it must eat you alive knowing you'll never be as good as me."
his jaw flexes.
"you're just all talk, niki." you force another laugh, "all bark, no bite."
you pause and then smile, "and if i wanted someone to fuck me breathless?" your eyes glaze over his face, watching his jaw tick. "it sure as hell wouldn't be a guy who can't even keep up in the water."
the silence that follows is instant. thick.
and then— he laughs.
low. humorless. dangerous.
"alright."
your stomach flips at the sound, you felt yourself gush.
he drops the towel from his hips. your breath catches—eyes flashing down without thinking—and he sees it. sees the way your gaze sticks, the way your lips part.
he steps forward, grabs your chin, his fingers firm but not cruel—and tilts your head up to look at him.
"you wanted to mouth off one more time?" he raises an eyebrow.  "go ahead. just remember—this is what you asked for."
his hand drops. "bend over the bench."
you freeze and blink.
"w-what?"
he doesn't repeat himself. doesn't need to. his eyes are heavy and unblinking, voice steady, "you're not walking out of this room without being reminded who you belong to."
and then, "and when i'm done, you're going to thank me for ruining you."
you don't move.
he told you to bend over the bench, and you're still standing there—defiant, knees wobbly, throat dry, but still trying to glare at him like he didn't just peel every inch of power off you like a second skin.
he notices, of fucking course he does.
niki's always been good at seeing straight through your bullshit. today, he's done letting you hide behind it.
he steps forward—slow, steady—and you catch the brief flick of heat in his eyes as he looks you up and down. like he's deciding how to start.
"you think you're clever, huh?"
you scoff, but it's weak.
his hand lifts—trailing fingertips along the line of your arm, down the damp curve of your side. he doesn't touch anywhere dangerous, he doesn't give you what you want.
and that's exactly what drives you insane.
"you talk a big game," he murmurs, "but your body's already begging."
you open your mouth to argue—and then gasp when his knuckle grazes the hem of your suit.
"shaking." his fingers slide down the inside of your thigh, barely a whisper. "dripping." he leans in, "and not from the pool."
you stiffen, teeth clenched.
"say it," he whispers. "you want it."
you glare, "go to hell."
he smiles, "ladies first."
and then—he moves behind you. hands settling at your hips, thumbs dipping beneath the band of your suit. he doesn't yank it off. doesn't rush. he just holds you there.
"you know what the problem is?" he says softly. "you've never had someone fuck you like they mean it."
your stomach flips.
"you push and push, trying to find the edge, hoping someone grabs you before you fall off." his breath is warm against your neck. his voice stays steady, "and now you have."
he peels the suit down slowly, agonizingly slow—until it clings to your thighs, slick and wet. you were exposed, your breasts and cunt on full display.
you could feel him, his cock thick and heavy against your back.  you suck in a breath.
he traces one hand up the back of your leg, stopping at the dip of your lower back.
"bend over."
you don't. not yet.
"make me," you whisper, voice cracking just a little.
he hums, "i will."
and then—finally—his palm lands on your ass in one sharp, controlled slap. not hard enough to hurt. just enough to steal the air from your lungs.
"last warning," he says. "next time you talk back, i won't be so nice."
you swallow hard.
and slowly, trembling, you fold over the bench.
he lets the silence stretch. lets you sit there, exposed and tense, pride crumbling by the second.
then you feel his hand again—this time between your thighs, knuckles brushing your heat.
"look at you." he chuckles darkly, "still pretending you're not dripping for me."
you whimper and he still hasn't even taken his time with you yet.
your cheek's pressed to the cold bench now, legs trembling. arms burning. swimsuit halfway down your thighs and niki behind you—silent for a moment, watching.
you hate that your body's already arching toward him, hips twitching like you're searching for friction. you hate that he hasn't even really touched you yet, and your skin still feels like it's going to ignite.
he drags one finger through your folds. slow. careful. barely any pressure.
and then clicks his tongue, "messy."
you stiffen.
"this wet over a couple words?" he laughs tauntingly, "i didn't even do anything yet."
you hiss through your teeth, "fuck you."
he laughs, low and sharp, "you really don't learn, do you?"
he drags that same finger over you again, slower this time, teasing your entrance without dipping in. "you think i'm gonna be nice just because you're dripping?"
"you think this is a reward?"
he leans in again, breath hot against your ear. "you ran your mouth for an hour straight and now look at you." you whine when his finger grazes your clit, "bent over. shaking. soaked."
"like some needy little brat who doesn't even deserve to cum."
your stomach drops and then—he brushes your clit again.  once. light. barely enough to feel.
you gasp.
"yeah, that's what i thought." he smiles. "so easy." you try to push back into his hand, grinding subtly, desperate for more—he pulls away.
you whine and he laughs.
"no, no. don't get greedy." his chest hard against your back, "not after all that attitude."
you squeeze your eyes shut, frustration bubbling in your chest.
"say please," he murmurs.
you shake your head.
"say it."
silence.
so he grabs your ass again, spreading you open, gaze locked on your dripping cunt.
"fine," he huffs softly. "we'll just stay like this."
and he does.
he touches you again—light strokes, slow circles, never consistent. never deep, just enough to keep you right on the edge of madness. every time your hips roll back, he pulls away. every time your thighs twitch, he stills.
you're panting now, aching. begging in your head.
but he waits.
until your pride starts to crumble, voice shaking— "please..."
he hums. "hmm?"
"please," you whisper again. "touch me."
he cups you fully now, hot palm against your core, middle finger sliding in just enough to tease.
"so polite all of a sudden."
you squirm.
"you wanna cum?" he asks. "after all that attitude?"
you nod.
"you wanna get filled like the dumb little slut you've been acting like?"
your breath stutters.
"then you're gonna fucking earn it."
he pulls his hand away again and this time, you sob.
your legs are jelly and your arms are trembling. cunt aching. niki's hands have been everywhere—except where you need them. and you can't take it anymore.
you can't.
"please," you breathe. "please, ni-ki, i'll—i'll be good."
you feel him smile against your shoulder.
"no, you won't."
you whimper.
"you'll run your mouth again tomorrow." he knew you like the back of his hand, and he knew what he had to do to you.  "you'll tease. you'll provoke. you'll pretend like you didn't beg me to ruin you in the locker room."
his hand slides between your thighs again, two fingers pressing into you with no rhythm—just enough to make you feel how empty you still are.
"you'll pretend like you're not still dripping my cum when you get back in the water."
your eyes roll back.
"say you're sorry."
you swallow hard, "i'm sorry."
"say you need me."
"i—i need you."
"say who owns you."
you hesitate for half a second too long and he pulls away again.
"fuck—no, wait, wait—!"
but he steps back completely, hands off, voice dangerously low. "not good enough." he steps back and circles around, grabbing you by the hair.
not harsh, just final.
he pulls your head up, enough to get a better angle—then slides the tip of his cock across your lips causing you to gasp.
"you want something to say?" he murmurs, voice like silk. "say it around my dick."
you glare up at him, breathing hard. and then slowly, so slowly—you open your mouth.
he slides in.
the position's filthy. so filthy. bent at the waist, ass in the air, face tilted back and cock filling your mouth from above.
he doesn't rush.
just pushes deeper, slow and steady, until you're gagging—your throat tight, lips stretched, spit already dripping onto the bench beneath you.
"there she is," he breathes. "so fucking quiet all of a sudden."
his hand stays tight in your hair as he rocks his hips—grinding deep, letting you choke around him, then pulling back just enough to let you breathe.
"thought you were tough?" he pants, "thought you were better than me?" he thrusts again, deeper this time, and your knees buckle.
"what happened to all that attitude, baby?"
you whimper around him, mouth raw and wet and full. you're flushed and fucked out, and he hasn't even touched your pussy again yet.
"you like this, don't you?" he grunts when he feels you hollow out your cheeks, essentially vacuuming him in. "being used. being owned."
he slides out, dragging his cock across your swollen lips before slapping it against your tongue.
"tell me who you belong to."
you moan at his words and he smirks. "can't? that's alright."
"i'll fuck it into you instead."
he releases your hair and twists you around so he could grab your hips again—lining up behind you, cock wet and heavy with spit and arousal.
and that's what does it.
you hear the low rustle of him stroking himself behind you. hear the way his breathing shifts.
and then—you feel it.
the head of his cock nudging against your entrance, thick and hot and already leaking.
"shouldn't give brats what they beg for," he mutters. "makes 'em worse."
and then he pushes in, all at once.
you scream.
he groans low, hands locking around your hips, slamming in to the hilt with one hard, deep stroke that steals the air from your lungs.
"fuck—look at you." his eyes watching your ass meet his pelvis, "took it so easy. like you were made for it."
you can't think, can't breathe. he's so deep. too deep. and he's not stopping.
"you wanted a loser?" his voice drips venom. "losers don't fuck like this."
his hips snap into yours, slow and punishing. "losers don't make you this fucking full."
you choke on a moan. nails scraping the wood of the bench. every thrust makes your toes curl, your back arch—your body giving up and giving in.
he leans over you now, one hand gripping your jaw, forcing your head to tilt.
"you talk big," he pants. "but you melt the second i split you open."
his thumb pushes into your mouth and you suck without thinking, needy and broken and gone.
"such a fucking mouth on you," he growls. "but you're better like this."
"dumb. stuffed. obedient."
you moan around his thumb—whimpering, twitching, clenching around him so tight it punches a groan out of his chest.
"you gonna cum, baby?" he asks, voice sharp. "you gonna cream on my cock like a little fucking toy?"
you nod frantically. "yes—yes, please, please—"
"you gonna let me breed this pussy raw?" you clench around him even tighter at his filthy words.
"yes, yes—please, i need it—"
he removes his fingers from you mouth so he could grab your hips tighter and thrust harder. you scream, head falling forward, bench scraping beneath your chest as he fills you in one brutal stroke.
"fuck—niki—!"
"shut up."
he slams in again. "you got your mouth full once, you'll take it again." his cock drags deep and slow inside you, hips snapping with brutal precision—every thrust punching breath from your lungs.
"you're gonna take every inch." he snaps at you, his grip on you now bruising. "and you're gonna fucking thank me for it."
your mind blanks. body clenching around him, trying to pull him deeper even as your legs shake under the weight of it all.
he leans over you again, voice low in your ear. "say please."
"please—please, fuck, i'm sorry—"
"too late."
his hand wraps around your throat, just enough pressure to make you gasp. "you talk back, you get used."
"you run your mouth, and i'll fill every hole you got."
you cry out, overstimulated and aching and full. and still—he keeps going. he fucks you like he's marking you.
hips heavy against yours, cock driving in deep, over and over again—slick, raw, relentless. you're soaked and stretched and shaking, arms trembling from holding yourself up.
his grip doesn't waver.
one hand still on your throat, the other locked around your hip, guiding you back onto every punishing thrust like he's training you to take it.
"so quiet now," niki pants. "what happened, baby?"
you moan—a wrecked, breathless sound.
"that mouth kept running, but look at you now—" he pushes in deep and stays there.
you scream.
"just a fucktoy with nothing left to say."
you're too full and it aches in the best way. your pussy pulses around him, fluttering with each deep grind of his hips.
"you feel that?" he pulls back, just an inch—then slams in again, cock kissing your cervix.
"that's what happens when you bait me."
your legs buckle. niki catches you effortlessly—shifts his grip to your waist and fucks you through it, unbothered by your whimpering, your twitching, your begging.
"gonna fill this bratty little cunt," he groans. "make you carry something more permanent than a loss."
your eyes roll back.
"you want that?" he growls. "want my cum dripping out of you while you pretend you're not mine?"
"yes—yes, please—"
"fuck," he hisses, thrusts getting sharper. "you need it, don't you?"
"need it—need you to—fuck—please, ni-ki—" you babble mindlessly, to fucked out to realize what he was saying.
he grabs your hair again and pulls. your back arches. pussy clenches. he feels it.
"oh, you're gonna cum," he breathes. "and when you do? i'll be so deep in you, you'll feel it in your throat."
"you're gonna thank me for breeding this cunt."
you sob and then—you snap. you cum hard, mouth open in a silent cry, vision going white, body locking around him.
niki groans—low and guttural—and fucks you through it.
doesn't slow down.
doesn't stop.
"take it," he pants."take every fucking drop."
and then he cums—deep, deep, cock twitching inside you, his cum spilling thick and hot into your pulsing cunt.
"fuck—just like that—" he curses, eyes shutting. "that's it—good girl—fuck—mine."
you're gasping, shaking, ruined.
he stays there, buried deep. twitching.
his hands soften on your waist. you can feel him throbbing inside you, still filling you up, like he meant to breed you and make sure it stuck.
your mouth opens but no sound comes out.
he leans over your back, presses a kiss between your shoulders.
"what's wrong?" he murmurs. "nothing left to say?"
he grins.
"good." you're twitching underneath him. sweat-slicked, breathless, your arms collapsed beneath you. face pressed to the bench, legs spread open wide with niki's cum dripping hot and messy out of your ruined cunt.
you're wrecked, but he's still hard.
"you thought i was done?" he murmurs, almost amused. "baby, you haven't learned anything."
you whimper, trying to lift your head.
too slow.
he's already pushing back in—your cunt still fluttering, oversensitive, making it hurt in the most unbearable way.
"wait—wait, i can't—"
"you can."
his hands grip your hips again—tighter this time.
"and you will."
he fucks into you again, deep and slow, cock dragging against soaked walls that clench down like they're still desperate to keep him.
you scream.
your nails dig into the bench. your thighs shake violently, your cunt pulsing with the aftershocks of your last orgasm—and he's still going.
"this pussy's still so wet," he breathes. "can't decide if it's from me or from you."
he thrusts again, making you cry out.
"can't tell if you're begging me to stop—" he grunts "—or to never stop fucking you."
he leans over you, chest pressed to your back, lips brushing your ear. "you're leaking all over the bench, baby."
"do you even know how pretty you look like this?"
you sob.
he reaches around and slides his fingers between your thighs, spreads the cum that's dripping out, and spreading it over your clit.
"don't waste it," he murmurs. "you wanted it so bad, remember?"
your whole body jerks but he doesn't stop.
just keeps fucking you with long, punishing strokes—grinding against your swollen, overstimulated walls like he wants to split you open all over again.
"gonna give me another," he pants. "you can take it. i know you can."
"gonna come again on this cock while it's still leaking with my first load—"
you choke on a sob, thighs clenching, tears slipping down your cheeks.
"—and then you're gonna thank me."
"say thank you, baby."
you try but nothing comes out.
so he slaps your ass—just once, hard enough to sting—and fucks you harder.
"say it."
"thank you—thank you—fuck, niki, i—" your voice breaks again.
your body snaps and another orgasm rips through you—violent, uncontrollable, white-hot and unbearable—and your vision blacks out for a second from how hard you cum around him.
niki groans through clenched teeth, cock twitching again inside you, and his hand presses firm to your lower stomach. "fuck, baby," he breathes. "you're still so tight."
"how the fuck are you still squeezing me like this—?" he thrusts once more, deep, rough, unforgiving and then he cums again.
right on top of your second orgasm, flooding you for the second time, groaning through it while your whole body shakes beneath him.
it's too much. it's too much.
you're crying now, sobbing into the bench. stretched out, bred, stuffed so full his cum starts spilling out with every twitch of his cock.
and he still doesn't pull out.
"that's it," he whispers, soft now, pressing his lips to your shoulder. "that's what i wanted."
"fought me every second—but now look at you."
"fucked dumb and full of me."
you hiccup through a breath.
he smiles, "good girl."
you try to move. a soft, trembling shift of your hips—instinctual. desperate.
"n-no more—" your voice cracks, wrecked and raw, and your thighs twitch from the overwhelming stretch still seated inside you.
niki doesn't say anything at first. he just tightens his grip. his palm presses flat against the middle of your back, and he leans down, chest flush to your back, cock still buried deep in your overstimulated cunt.
you freeze.
"where do you think you're going?" he murmurs, voice low, calm, dark.
you squirm again when he grinds his hips.
slow. deep.
you whimper.
"you're not done." his voice dark, threatening "not even close." you sob into the bench, arms trembling beneath you.
"you're gonna stay right here," he continues, breathing hot against your ear, "and you're gonna keep my cum where it fucking belongs."
his hand slips down your spine again, trails between your legs.
he drags his fingers through the mess leaking out of you—hot, sticky, endless. "fuck, look at you."
"can't even hold it all in."
he pushes two fingers back in—shallow—and your body jolts. "stuffed full and still greedy."
"isn't this what you wanted?" his tone mocking. "to get bred like a dumb little cumdump?"
you cry out, body twitching, trying again to pull away—but his cock throbs inside you, and you clench.
he smirks, "oh, baby," he hums. "your pussy's telling on you." he rocks his hips—slow grind, barely any thrust, just a filthy roll of his cock that drags along every overstimulated nerve inside you.
"tight and messy," he groans. "still sucking me in like you belong to me."
he licks a stripe up your shoulder, lips curling into a grin. "you like being used, don't you?"
"getting put in your place. fucked until you cry," he cooed softly, your body twitching.
"you like being mine."
your breath stutters but he keeps going.
"say it," he growls, pushing deep again. "say you're mine."
"say this cunt's mine to use—mine to fill whenever i want. mine to leave leaking on this bench like a used little toy."
you choke on a sob.
"say it."
"yours," you whimper, voice thin and hoarse. "m'yours, niki—i'm yours—"
"damn right."
his hand fists in your hair again and he yanks your head back—gently, but possessive. you're wrecked. flushed, wet, glassy-eyed and ruined.
he kisses your jaw.
"look at you," he whispers. "you were so fucking mouthy an hour ago."
"now you're just a warm hole for me to use." his cock twitches inside you again and you clench, helpless and aching and dripping.
"you'll take me again when i'm ready," he adds, breath fanning hot across your ear, "and you'll cum again. harder this time."
"because this pussy is mine now." his voice low and menacing, "and you don't come unless i say so."
"understand?"
you nod, sobbing through it.
he smiles, "good girl."
he grinds in deeper, cock still rock hard, and wraps his arm fully around your waist to keep you there—locked in, stretched open, and completely owned.
you don't even realize he's moving again until his hands shift position—one locking around your waist, the other curling under your chin to tilt your head up.
his cock drags out of you just a few inches.
you flinch, "n-ni-ki—i can't—"
"yes," he snaps, quiet and sharp. "you can."
his voice is cold now. not angry—but final. "you wanted to run your mouth, brat," he growls.
"so now you'll take what comes with it."
you try to push up but he shoves you right back down."keep your ass up."
and you do—legs trembling, arms buckling beneath you, sobs already caught in your throat—because the tone in his voice says don't make me say it again.
and then, he fucks back in.
hard.no mercy.
your scream rips out of you, raw and shattered, because there's no build up this time. no warning. just him, full and brutal, fucking into your soaked, overstimulated cunt like it was made for this.
like you were made for him.
"gonna fuck you until you break," he snarls, hips slamming against your ass, cock dragging against your sore, cum-slick walls with every ruthless thrust.
"until your brain shuts off—until you forget anything but how full you are."
you cry into the bench and he grits his teeth. "how fucking owned you are."
he hits deeper, your whole body jolts.
"can't even push me out anymore, huh?" he seethes in your ear, "cunt's been fucked open so wide it needs me to stay."
your legs give out, but he doesn't let you fall, he holds you up. keeps your hips locked in place with bruising fingers and fucks you through it like he doesn't even hear your sobs anymore.
or maybe he does, and he likes them.
"this is what happens," he pants, breath hot and sharp against your back, "when you talk too much." he smacks your ass. "when you forget your place."
"now you know."
you try to answer but all that comes out is a gasping cry.
"that's right," he groans. "just cry, baby."
"cry while i fill you one more time."
and then he slams in—hard, deep, possessive—and groans through gritted teeth as he cums again inside you, cock twitching violently, cum spilling into your already wrecked pussy for the third time.
your cunt pulses. leaks. gapes. you fall limp beneath him. he stays in you for a long moment and lets it all sink in.
and then—he pulls out.
a broken moan escapes your throat. you feel it all rush out of you—hot, heavy, filthy—as his cum starts dripping out in thick streams, down your thighs, pooling under you on the bench.
you hear him exhale but you're too spent to even lift your head.
his hand ghosts across your ass one last time. not tender. not cruel.
just claiming.
"take the loss," he murmurs. "and clean yourself up."
and then—he walks away.
leaves you trembling. gaping. bred and ruined.
like a win was never even on the table.
— enjoy this fic? check out my other ones right here!
419 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 20 days ago
Text
updates will be very slow starting this following week. prior to this i worked a part time job and did school but now i got full time big girl job and do school… so i don’t have the time or energy to update like i used to which was typically every week :( i will still be active but content will not be as consistent!
10 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 22 days ago
Text
‘saw you first’ is out!
メ wips
here are some of my works in progress, short summaries and possible release dates.
saw you first | yjw
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you try to run, jungwon lets you—just to remind you that you’ll always belong to him.
genre: chainsaw man au
pairing: chainsaw man!jungwon x barista!reader
read here
taste for you | pjs
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you try to profile jay park, but he profiles you first—and likes what he sees.
genre: hannibal au
pairing: inmate!jay x forensic psychology student!reader
release date: tbd
sweet on the inside | yjw
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you push your quiet boss too far and he finally decides to push back.
genre: cafe au
pairing: cafe owner!jungwon x college student!reader
release date: tbd
853 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 22 days ago
Text
saw you first | yjw
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you try to run, jungwon lets you—just to remind you that you’ll always belong to him.
genre: chainsaw man au
pairing: chainsaw man!jungwon x barista!reader
warnings: yandre!jungwon, some unwarranted touching, toxic!jungwon, so incredibly delusional!jungwon, forced proximity, forced relationship, reader is basically held hostage, dub/non con, oral (f.rec), unprotected p in v, breeding kink, jungwon wants to baby trap reader, chocking, manhandling…i think that’s it…
wc: 23.3k+
a/n: i am once again proving that i can write plot! this was originally supposed to be a mere 12k words… i got a bit carried away with plot and i knew that if i left it as is then people would b asking for a part 2 so i just decided to bless yall w a fat one. anyways..hope yall enjoy! notes, reblogs and comments r always appreciated! enjoy :]
taglist: @won1yoiz @fancypeacepersona @betda @starry-eyed-bimbo @theothernads @wonzzziezzzz @yeonmuse @rikifordmiami
@pinkiwinkiminki
⛧⃝
fear has distinct shape.
that's what they say now at least. not metaphorically, not in poetry or horror films—but literally. fear became real the moment it was fed into our minds enough. when the world collapsed under the weight of its own nightmares, that fear grew legs, claws and mouths. and then it started eating people.
devils took over slowly, like mold growing in the walls of an abandoned house. first the animals disappeared, then the kids and then the sunlight.
cities fell, corpses rose and when the governments failed, public safety stepped in. an army of hunters built on contracts, blood, and desperation took over and now every city is its own kind of hell.
and you?
you make cappuccinos in seoul sector 3 where the devils are meaner, the streets rot faster, and no one comes to help when someone cries out into the night.
you took the job at 'sublime café' because it was small, unassuming, and just far enough off the grid to keep trouble at bay—or so you thought. in your 7 months working here, you hadn't ran into any devils. so you allowed yourself to relax, to let your guard down—until you remembered why it was up in the first place.
a dented metal shutter protected the windows at night, a reinforced steel door led to the back alley. the owner stocked a baseball bat under the register and holy water near the tea bags.
you know, just in case.
it was mostly quiet, with not many lurking on this side of the city. your regulars were all a little dead behind the eyes, the kind of people who'd seen someone's head pop like a balloon and still come in for an iced americano.
you got used to it. you stopped flinching when the ground trembled or when blood ran between the pavement cracks. you told yourself you weren't important enough to be hunted, no one wanted you enough to lurk around in these areas.
until the night he showed up.
it was late, your shift was almost over. the rain had thinned to mist, clinging to the windows and softening the streetlights outside. you were behind the counter, counting cash and humming to yourself, when the sky split open with a crack like thunder—but deeper, wetter.
you stilled, then came the scream. not human—guttural. a sound that clawed at your spine and made your heart drop straight into your gut.
you moved before you could think, hands fumbling for the emergency switch behind the register. the lights dimmed to red and the steel shutters started to roll down over the windows, screeching like rusted bones.
too late.
the front wall exploded inward. shards of glass flew like it was raining knives and the floor cracked beneath the weight of something enormous slamming into the café. limbs twitching, body slithering like oil-slick muscle. the scent hit you next: rot and metal. spoiled blood, something not meant to be inhaled.
it loomed in the wreckage, a pulsing, unnatural shape that twitched and writhed in the corner of your eye. your brain struggled to give it form, it shifted with every blink. too many legs, too many teeth and an eye—one massive, unblinking orb that locked onto you like a spotlight.
"little human," it gurgled, voice like wet stone dragging across your skin. "what flavor does your fear come in?"
you couldn't move.
your breath caught in your throat and your legs were numb. your entire body was frozen—as if the fear had seeped straight into your bones and stiffened your body.  the devil laughed, the vibrations of his heinous voice causing the walls to shiver.
and then a scream, not yours, echoed the small café. something or, someone, sliced through the devil's body like a buzzsaw through meat. a red blur exploded through the wall behind it, tearing through flesh, bone and sinew. a scream of chains and fury, loud enough to rattle your teeth. blood sprayed the walls like a firehose. chunks of flesh splattered across the freshly cleaned espresso machine and counters.
you stumbled back, heart slamming against your ribs, vision full of red. he stood there—in the middle of the carnage.
a boy.
your age, maybe younger. head bowed, shoulders trembling with steam rising from his back like smoke from a freshly doused fire. a chainsaw jutted from his arms, coated in gore.
his chest rose and fell like he had just run a marathon. he was drenched in blood, chunks of devil flesh clung to his clothes and his blonde locks. his hands twitched at his sides like he didn't know what to do with them. the chainsaws that had morphed out of his his skin stopped buzzing now that there was nothing left to kill.
the devil was gone, eviscerated. there was nothing left but a pulp of its remnants and silence.
he looked up and for a moment, the café was dead quiet—no chainsaws, no screams, just the tick... tick... tick of blood dripping onto tile.
his eyes met yours and something in his face broke. his body relaxed, the saws slid back into his skin with a thick, wet noise, like knives sinking into flesh. he took one step forward, then another—slow, cautious, like he was afraid of startling you.
his face...was beautiful. soft jaw, lips chapped and bitten raw and a scar cut through his brow. but his eyes, his eyes were what scared you most. they looked at you like you were holy.
"you okay?" he asked, his voice soft and silky. it almost made you laugh at the stark contrast of his actions and his now demeanour.  you nodded before your mouth could catch up. "y—yeah." your voice cracked, your shirt was soaked in someone else's blood. your hands were shaking, you were not okay—but somehow, telling him that didn't feel like an option.
he stared at you, then he smiled. soft, warm, terrifying. "you smiled at me," he whispered, his gaze still stuck to you like glue.  your brows knit in confusion, "what?"
"just now. you... smiled. after i saved you."
you opened your mouth to correct him—you hadn't smiled, had you? maybe it was a nervous twitch. a reflex. maybe it was just shock—"no one's ever done that before," he said, like he was telling you a secret."not even the people i saved. they always scream. run. cry." his voice was getting quieter, more distant. like he was somewhere else and no longer present with you.
"but you looked at me like i'm—" he cut himself off. his head tilted slightly to the side, blood dripped from his chin. he was still staring at you, but now his gaze felt thicker, heavier. like it was sinking into your skin and wrapping around your lungs.
"what's your name?" you didn't answer. he took another step forward and you scrambled back—your back hitting the wall.
"i'm jungwon," he said simply. "i'll see you again." your eyes twitched at his confidence and you didn't know if you should take his words as a promise or a threat.
and just like that—he was gone.
no footsteps, no exit. just a blur of motion and silence, and then the night swallowed him whole. you stood there for a long time, long enough for the adrenaline to crash. long enough to cry, long enough to wonder if anyone would believe you when you told them that chainsaw man had saved your life—and smiled like he wanted to keep it.
keep you.
⛧⃝
you didn't tell anyone. except your boss, not the police, and not the shriveled old priest who came by every week to toss holy water on the café floor and mutter things in dead languages.
how do you explain that chainsaw man, the chainsaw man, public safety's blood-slick myth, devil hunter of devil hunters—saved your life, then whispered your name like he wanted to wear it?
you couldn't. so you didn't. you cleaned the blood off the tiles. replaced the windows, sanitized the counters and scrubbed devil guts out of the espresso machine. and then tried to convince yourself it was over, that you'd go back to normal.
but a week passed, and you started noticing things. small things, at first. on day 3, the café door rattled after closing, no one was there but you could feel an almost familiar presence. on day 4, your apartment window was unlocked when you got home—and you never forget to lock it. on day 5, someone left something on your doorstep. a devil's tooth, still wet and wrapped in a receipt from 'sublimez.' your name circled in red ink with a small heart right next to it.
you stopped sleeping after that, you told yourself it wasn't him. couldn't be. jungwon was a devil hunter, he saved people. he didn't... follow them? he didn't stalk them through alleys and leave parts of what he killed as gifts.
but part of you knew that it was him.  you remembered the look in his eyes and the way he said your name. like he wanted to keep it in his mouth forever.
you saw him again on the 7th night. it was after closing and the streets were nearly empty. mist clung to the ground like spilled breath. you'd taken the long way home—just in case. your feet ached and your breath fogged the air. you didn't notice him at first. but when you passed the alley across from the café—you felt it. a prickle up your spine, like being stared at for too long.
you turned around, your body shaking in anticipation and your legs positioning in fight or flight mood. although you seriously doubt you'd be able to outrun him, you'd take your chances. he was standing in the dark, his blonde hair peaking at you—taunting you.
jungwon.
half-hidden behind a wall of shadow and brick, but you could see his eyes. bright, sharp and tracking you. he didn't move, but you did. fast.
you didn't run, not yet, but your heart picked up with your pace hitching as you turned back toward the main street and kept walking. hands in your coat pockets, head down. don't look, don't run, don't let him know you're afraid.
"you're out late," his voice came from right behind you. you spun around in shock only to come face to face with him, he was close, too close. no chainsaws this time, no blood. just jungwon, in a torn hoodie and scuffed boots, looking at you like you were still glowing in his memory. you stepped back and he followed closely.
"you haven't been smiling lately," he said, voice soft. curious. "did something happen?" your throat closed, he had been following you. "jungwon," you said, stiff but politely. "what... are you doing here?" his head tilted and his lips curled into something like a smile but it was too calm—too fond.
"i wanted to see you," he said it like it was obvious. like it was inevitable."you smiled at me, remember?" he begins, watching your face carefully. "and i haven't stopped thinking about it." you didn't answer but your fingers tightened in your coat pockets. you could feel your phone, but you knew you wouldn't be able to move fast enough. not with him this close.
"people don't smile at me," he went on, voice gentler now. like he was trying to soothe you, like he knew what was going on in your head. "they scream. they call me a monster. they run." his gaze softens, his eyes glistening slightly as he stares down at you. "but you—" he takes a step closer. "—you looked at me like i was real." he stepped closer again, you hit the wall behind you. a dead-end.
he didn't touch you he just leaned in, his breath brushing your cheek, voice so low it trembled against your skin. "so i wanted to see what your fear looks like, too."
your breath caught in your throat. "don't worry," he murmured. "i won't hurt you." your still on edge but for some reason his words put you to ease, your body relaxing for a split second before seizing up again. "not unless you run."
his voice didn't rise, his body didn't shift. he didn't growl or flash those chainsaw blades. but somehow, it was worse this way. the calm, the softness. like he was already imagining peeling you open.
"jungwon," you whispered. "please don't—" "i'm not gonna hurt you," he repeated. "i just... want to be close." his fingers brushed your wrist, you flinched. he didn't pull away—if anything, he grew bolder. his touch moved up slowly, curling around your forearm. gentle, but firm—measured. like he was memorizing the shape of you. learning where your bones sat. how your pulse felt under his thumb.
you tried to step aside but his body blocked yours. he didn't shove—just leaned in, crowding you against the wall. his hand rose up, 2 fingers ghosted your cheek causing you to stiffen.  his eyes studied your face like it was a scene of violence he wanted to relive.
"you're shaking," he murmured. "i wonder..." his gaze darkened slightly, his thumb brushing your bottom lip—slow, like a question. "is that because you're scared of me... or because you remembered me?" your stomach turned, you pressed yourself harder against the brick, trying to shrink into nothing.
"you haven't smiled again," he murmured. "why?" he looked visibly upset, you failed to understand why it mattered as much as it did to him. "i didn't mean to smile," you said, voice brittle. "it was... i don't know. adrenaline. shock."
he blinked, then his smile fell. he looked hurt, "so it wasn't real?" you said nothing. "you didn't mean it?" he pressed, quieter this time. "you didn't really see me that way?" the weight of his body shifted. not threatening , not yet, but you could feel it. the invisible line between mercy and obsession starting to bend.
"i've never had someone look at me like that," he said, voice tight. "not once," he pauses for a moment.  "i dream about it, you know. your face. your eyes," his voice softens, and his body relaxes slightly. "you were scared, but you still looked. like i was something more than a weapon."
his hand was still on your face, still gentle. but there was pressure now—the kind that warned you not to pull away. "so if it wasn't real..." his forehead pressed against yours, you didn't breathe. "should i make it real?"
he didn't kiss you, he just hovered there—close enough to taste the heat of your skin, close enough that you could see the bloodstains still caked under his nails. his breath was soft, steady and patient. but he was waiting, and the look in his eyes showed that he he was willing to wait.
"say it again," he said quietly. "say you didn't mean it. say it to my face this time." you stared at him, you couldn't. you wouldn't. your mouth moved, but nothing came out. and maybe that was your answer.
his hand slid lower—over your jaw, down your neck, his fingertips just barely tracing your collarbone now. the pressure wasn't painful but it wasn't innocent, either.
"i knew it," he breathed, voice trembling with something dark and pleased. "you were meant for me," his eyes flicker down to your lips briefly before they jolt back up. your eyes widen at his words, to afraid to correct his delusions. how you wish you had.
his forehead dropped to your shoulder, and for a second, his whole body relaxes—as if touching you settled something wild in his blood.
he didn't let go, and he never will.
you stayed there for a long time trapped between brick and breath, trying not to move. when he finally pulled back, the air felt heavier without him—but not safer. "i'll walk you home," he said.
"no," you responded almost immediately. he tilted his head, blinked, then smiled again. this time much softer, more patient. "okay," he said. "maybe tomorrow." he didn't threaten you. didn't chase. didn't even touch you again. he just turned and walked back into the shadows like he hadn't just carved himself under your skin and stitched you in place.
⛧⃝
you wake up to the sun shining through your iron clad windows and the smell of coffee. not burnt and not cheap. something warm, deep—the kind you only get when someone really knows how to make it.
it was the aroma that hit you when you walked into work, however, you could never replicate that smell at home without the help of expensive machines and high quality grounds.
but you live alone, you sit up too fast. your head spins as you look around your room in suspicion. the room is still, the curtains are open and sunlight glows through the dirty glass. your room looks the same as when you fell asleep last night. everything looks normal, untouched.
except the door to your bedroom is open and you're sure you closed it last night. your ear perk up when you hear something unfamiliar, someone's humming. your throat goes dry, you push the blankets back slowly. your hand already reaching for your phone on the nightstand, but it's not there—the charger's empty.
your heartbeat kicks up. you step into the hallway like you're walking into a war zone, barefoot and barely breathing. the humming grows louder, it's familiar. sweet. soft. wrong. you turn the corner, and he's there.
jungwon. chainsaw man. him.
he's standing by your kitchen counter, sleeves rolled to his elbows, one hand holding a steaming mug while the other scrolls casually through your phone like it's his.
"you slept late," he says without turning. "your alarm went off three times." you don't speak, you can't. he finally looks over his shoulder. his smile is soft—too soft. for someone who had essentially broken into your home and was now making himself comfortable, he looked harmless. "i made coffee," he says, his eyes darting to the second mug placed on the counter.
your mouth moves before your fear can catch up, "how did you get in?" he blinks, slow—like the question doesn't make sense. "you were tired. you left the window open." you didn't, in fact, even if you did he wouldn't be able to get inside. you took the extra precaution to get metal bars installed.
"don't worry," he adds quickly. "i locked it behind me." he places your phone on the counter, "you should update your passcode." your stomach flips, "jungwon," you say and this time your voice shakes. "you need to leave."
he tilts his head like a confused dog. like a child being scolded for something he doesn't understand. "why would i leave?" he asks innocently, his bottom lip jutting out before he takes a small sip of his own coffee,
"because this is my apartment." his eyes narrow. something in his face twitches. the stillness in him turns sharp, like the surface of a knife just before it cuts. "and?" he scoffs. "you let me in. you smiled at me," he continues, staring at you as if you had grown 2 heads. "you wanted this."
"no," you whisper. "i didn't. you're not supposed to be here." the mug in his hand shatters and the ceramic hits the floor in a wet, violent crash—coffee splashing up your legs. you flinch, he doesn't. "don't say that," his voice is flat now.
quiet and cold. like the warmth got stripped out of him in a second. "you don't get to say that after what you did to me." you look at him baffled, "what did i—"
"you saw me," he snarls. "you looked at me like i was human. like i could be... something else. and now you're pretending it didn't mean anything?" he steps forward. you back up instinctively, but the hallway behind you is too narrow, too short. there's nowhere to run without turning your back to him—and you know better than that.
"i said leave—" "don't," he growls. "don't tell me to leave like i'm some stray." you look at him wide eyed, the once soft spoken man had long disappeared. "you don't get it," he breathes, getting closer. "i've killed for less than that look you gave me. i've torn devils apart for breathing wrong in my direction."
"but you..." he paused. "you smiled." his hand snaps out and you flinch, but he doesn't hit you, not yet at least. his fingers wrap around your wrist, tight. bruising tight. he presses you into the wall, "so don't lie to me now." his face is inches from yours. you can see blood on his collarbone. dried, not yours—not yet.
"you're scared," he whispers, voice softer now—too soft. mocking. "but you're still looking at me." his grip doesn't loosen and his body crowds yours. his other hand comes up, brushing your jaw, then sliding lower, pressing lightly at the base of your throat.
your breath stutters. "you're lying," he says again, almost lovingly. "but your body remembers me." his hand is still at your throat, not squeezing. but the weight of it is a warning. "say it," he murmurs. "say you didn't feel anything. lie to my face again."
your heart is pounding so loud you can barely think. your whole body is tensed—wired for flight, though you know there's nowhere to go. not like this, not with him so close.
"jungwon..." you try. "please. you're scaring me." his expression twitches, he blinks. then slowly, his hand drops. but the pressure in the room doesn't. "scared?" he echoes, voice tight. "of me?" you nod, breath hitching as you look at him with caution.
"good."
he doesn't move for a long moment. just stands there too still, too quiet—like the air before a building collapses. then he turns away and your breath starts to come back. just slightly, like maybe he's leaving. but then you hear it, his chainsaw arm erupts with a wet, mechanical roar. the sound is inhuman and deafening—like bone grinding against steel, metal tearing from muscle.
you scream when jungwon slams it into your kitchen wall. the entire cabinet explodes in splinters. wood and tile crash to the floor in pieces, your dishes shattering like glass bombs. the wall crumbles halfway inward, revealing the hollow space between drywall and insulation.
he doesn't even flinch. "i didn't want to scare you," he says, low. "i wanted to protect you." he rips the blade free and the whine cuts out. blood sprays across his shoulder—not yours. he turns around slowly, breathing hard, skin flecked with debris. his voice is shaking now, like he's losing control, "i killed for you. i came back for you."
"do you know how many devils i could've gutted instead of sitting outside your building every night, just to make sure nothing touched you?" your throat locks at his confession. he steps closer again, no blade this time—just him.
"and you're scared because i came in the window?" his eyes are wild now—not fully devil, but not fully human either. something in between. something ruined.
"you should be grateful."
you try to move, to slide away from him, but he grabs your arm and slams you back into the wall. your head spins. not from the force but from the rage in him, the heat. his face is close again, not tender this time—unhinged.
"you think anyone else would survive seeing what i really am?" he hisses. "you think anyone else could stand in front of me, still breathing, still beautiful, and not end up in pieces?"
"no one else gets this," he breathes, almost reverent. "but you do. i saw it in you. i felt it." his hand trails down your side, slow and heavy—the weight of it not fully threatening, but not right either. not safe, it makes your skin crawl. "you smiled," he whispers. "you gave me something."
he presses his forehead to yours, teeth gritted. "and i'm not letting it go." his voice is trembling now—with fury, with hunger, with something darker. "so run, scream, cry, whatever you need. but you're not getting away."
you can feel it now, not just the obsession. but the need. violent. desperate. terminal.he doesn't see you as a person anymore. you're a purpose—a prize. a promise he's decided belongs to him.
"you're mine," he says finally. "you just don't know it yet."
⛧⃝
you can feel him watching you. all morning, it's like your skin is too tight. like your body knows something you're trying to ignore. you nearly drop 3 orders. keep checking the café windows like a girl being hunted—because you are.
and finally, around noon, you see him. standing across the street. still. expressionless. face half in shadow beneath his hoodie. not moving, not blinking—just staring. you freeze mid-pour, the milk spilling over the lip of the cup.
"hey...you okay?" your manager, seoyun, glances at you, eyebrows knit. she's young, sharp, not someone who misses things.
you swallow hard, "yeah. yeah, i'm—" but you glance back toward the window. jungwon's still there, like he never left last night—like he just waited. you lean closer to seoyun, voice low. "can i tell you something? and you promise not to freak out?" seoyun blinks, "...sure."
"you know that guy who saved me? when the devil attacked the other day?" seoyun nodded carefully, still confused, "the one with the chainsaw arm?" you nod, "his name's jungwon." her brows lift, "okay?"
"he's been following me. i woke up and he was in my apartment." she stiffens immediately, "what the fuck."
"he said i smiled at him. that i made him feel human. now he... he won't stop showing up," you feel sick saying it out loud. like giving it breath will make it worse, make him hear you somehow. "do you want me to go out there?" she offers. "i'll tell him to back off."
"no—!" you grab her arm, panic rising in your throat. "don't go near him. he's not like normal people, seoyun. i don't know what he'd do." you couldn't risk your bosses life, you knew what jungwon was capable of.
she stares at you for a long moment then nods. "i'll walk you home tonight. he tries anything, i'll scream bloody murder." you nod, then continue on with your shift—trying to ignore the blonde boy who followed your every move from outside.
he follows the whole walk. never close enough to touch you but never far enough to feel safe. you don't look at him once, but you feel him—across the street, pacing your steps, his gaze like heat at the base of your spine.
seoyun doesn't say anything. she just walks beside you, phone gripped tight in one hand. at your door, you fumble with your keys. "you gonna be okay?" she whispers, her brows furrowing with concern. "i'll text you," you say. "just... don't talk to him. promise me."
she nods, "lock your windows this time, dumbass." they are..bolted down.
you laugh a little, your eye twitching. but your stomach's still twisting as you watch her walk away. jungwon doesn't follow, he just stands there. across the street, backlit by the streetlamp—not moving.
you close your door, lock it. deadbolt it. pull the curtains tight. you try to breathe but your heartbeat dulls in your chest. the next thing on your mind besides your safety was a steaming hot shower.
the heat fogs up the mirror, the hiss of water drowns out the city. for a minute, you almost feel normal. and then you hear it, the wet sound of metal grinding. flesh splitting. bone tearing. a mechanical rev like a scream from inside the walls.
you freeze. you barely have time to grab a towel when the lights go out. the door to the bathroom creaks, you grab the edge of the sink to stay upright. he's here.
"you really let someone walk you home?" his voice is low, too calm. "you let her touch you. talk to you. stand between us," the door groans open. he's a silhouette in the steam—broad shoulders, soaked hoodie, a jagged red glow from the chainsaw arm humming low by his side. blood drips from the blade onto your floor. your heart drops at the sight, the blood looked fresh.
"you think that's okay?" he steps closer. you step back,"jungwon, don't—" "i told you," he snarls, "you don't lie to me. you don't hide from me." he had a crazed look in his eye, a look you had only seen when he was slicing through the demon when you had initially first met him
"i saw you," he breathes. "i claimed you. and now you're pretending like you're scared? like you didn't give yourself to me that day with just one smile?" he lunges at you. you gasp as he slams you back into the tiled wall, water still running, towel barely clinging to your body. the chainsaw arm doesn't touch you, but it's close—humming by your shoulder, hot and slick with blood.
his other hand grabs your jaw, "you're mine," he growls. "say it." "no—" his eyes flash and the chainsaw kicks up with a roar. you scream when he slams it into the floor beside you. tiles explodes, the blade missing your foot by mere inches.
"say it," he hisses. "or next time, i don't miss." you're shaking. you can feel the blood heat on your skin, the vibrating metal, the weight of his body pinning you in. his eyes are wild, mouth curled into a snarl—not because he wants to hurt you, but because he needs you. needs to own you. and every second you deny him, it eats him alive.
"say it," he breathes, leaning in. "say you're mine and i'll make the rest of the world disappear." you say it, you don't mean it. but you say it, "i'm yours." and jungwon—drenched in blood, blade humming inches from your skin, just stops.
his hand loosens around your jaw. the chainsaw groans once, then shuts down, the sharp teeth sinking back into his skin with a sickening crunch. you watch as the flesh heals over, smooth again like it never happened—like he was normal.
he looks at you, breathing hard. wild. then...he smiles. and it's worse than the blade, because it's soft, gentle. like he thinks this is love,  "i knew you'd come around," he murmurs, brushing a wet strand of hair from your face. "i knew you were just scared."
you don't answer, you can't. your whole body is frozen—not from fear now, but from the realization that you've passed some kind of line. that there's no going back. he leans in and presses a kiss to your forehead. it's warm and your stomach turns. "go dry off," he says. "i'll clean up." you do. not because you trust him—but because you're scared of what he'll do if you don't.
when you come out in an oversized shirt, the mess is gone. the blood on the floor, the shattered tile—gone. like it never happened. jungwon is in your kitchen, his shirt off. back turned, casually eating one of your apples, his chainsaw arm completely gone now, like it was a dream.
"i threw out your coffee," he says, like he lives here. "you drink too much of it. not good for your nerves." your throat tightens, "you need to leave."
he turns around, smiles again, "i just got here." he walks past you, slow and confident, already settled—and drops onto your couch like it belongs to him. "you can take the bed tonight. i'll stay here." you blink owlishly, "you're— staying?"
"of course," he says, like it's obvious. "you said you're mine. that means you're safe now. no devils. no one else. just me." you stare at him as he's making himself at home.
pulling his hoodie off. throwing his boots by your door. opening your fridge like it's his. your skin crawls, but you nod. "okay," you whisper. "just tonight." he watches you, his eyes narrow slightly. then softens again. "you'll come around," he says. "i know you will."
you turn, heart pounding, and walk to your room. you shut the door. lock it, as if that'll do anything. you sit on the edge of your bed and cry silently, hands over your mouth, too afraid to let the sound slip through.
outside, jungwon hums to himself. the floor creaks as he walks back and forth. at some point, you hear him in the hallway. opening the linen closet. the bathroom. checking every room. making sure nothing else lives here but him. he stops at your door, your breath catches.
tap. tap. tap.
his knuckle against the wood. "goodnight," he says softly. "you're mine now. you don't have to be scared anymore."
the next morning, your apartment is quieter than it's ever been—too quiet. you wake up and immediately check your bedroom door. it's unlocked. you're sure you locked it. you step out slowly, heart pounding in your throat—and stop.
your living room is clean, too clean. like it's been rearranged. your favorite blanket is gone, your books are stacked neatly in color order, two of your framed pictures are missing. you find jungwon in your kitchen again. he's making eggs.
"morning," he says, without turning. "your knives were dull. i sharpened them." he slides a plate in front of you and smiles. you sit down slowly, he sits too—across from you. he doesn't eat, just watches you. like it makes him feel full. "where's my blanket?"
"it smelled like someone else," he says simply. "i burned it." you stare at him as blankly as you could, afraid that if you showed to much he'd lash out.  he cocks his head, "you don't need it. you have me."
you open your mouth and then close it. your throat's dry. you try to focus on your plate. you need to get through breakfast, keep him calm.
but then your phone rings, a soft vibration on the table. you reach for it but he grabs your wrist mid-air. gently but firm.
"don't."
you peer down to see the name on the screen, a sigh of relief escaping your parted lips, "it's just seoyun—" "you don't need to talk to her," his voice stays calm and level. but there's something else under it, something dangerous. he looks you in the eyes, "you're not hers. you're mine."
you swallow hard, "jungwon..." he lets go of your wrist. then picks up your phone, stares at it for a second and drops it into your full coffee mug.
it sinks. the screen sparks once and goes black. "i'll get you a new one," he says. "you don't need distractions right now." you stare at the cup, black coffee rising around the ruined screen.
"what if i need to call someone?" your mouth moves before you realize.  he raises an eyebrow, "why would you?" you feel it, the panic building in your chest. the slow horror of how normal he's making this feel.
you stand, too fast, "i'm going to shower." he nods, "leave the door open." you pause, stare at him like he was crazy. which, he was. "what?" "just a crack," he says, smiling. "so i know you're safe."
you don't argue, you go to the bathroom. close the door, but you don't lock it. you don't dare. when you get out, one of your favorite hoodies is missing from the hook. you find it later—folded neatly in jungwon's bag.
the next day, you notice more things gone. a pair of heels you wore once on a date. your perfumes, a small photo of you and your old coworker—who happened to be a guy. that's gone too.
jungwon's in your bed that night, curled up beside you like it's the most normal thing in the world. he's warm, his arm drapes over your stomach like a belt. you're stiff, staring at the ceiling, too afraid to move.
"you're softer when you sleep," he whispers, breath warm against your neck. "like you're not fighting me anymore." you shut your eyes tight and  he pulls you closer. "i know you're scared," he murmurs. "but i'm going to take care of you. even if you hate me for it."
you don't respond and he presses a kiss to your shoulder, "you'll learn to love me. i'll make sure of it."
the next morning, he makes you breakfast again. you find your closet rearranged, the tighter dresses folded at the back and the sweatpants you love? gone.
"you look best in soft things," jungwon says, brushing your hair back. "like someone i want to keep." you ask him to leave, "just for a day. i need space." he smiles calmly, the same smile that caused shivers to run down your spine. "why would you need space from the person who loves you the most?"
you push, you say you want time to think. his expression shifts and for just a second, the smile falls. his jaw tenses and his eyes go cold. but then—he laughs. "okay," he says. "i understand."
"really?" you look at him dumbfounded.  "of course. take all the time you need." he leans in and presses a soft kiss to your temple. "just don't be mad when i come back." you don't breathe until he's gone. you rush to the door, you try the locks—they don't budge. you mentally curse yourself for having bolted down windows at this point.  you check under the sink for your emergency phone—it's gone.
and then you hear it. a low, grinding rev. metal screaming and flesh tearing. you run to the hallway and stop dead. the door to your apartment is now marked. deep, jagged gouges— a chainsaw blade dragged in a heart shape across the wood.
inside the heart? one word, carved clean through.
MINE.
⛧⃝
you wait until he's asleep. his back rises and falls steadily beside you with one arm tossed around your waist, face buried in your neck like you're some stuffed animal he can't let go of.
you hold your breath. slowly, gently, you slide out from under his arm. his fingers twitch, but he doesn't wake. you slip into the hallway and grab your shoes. your heart pounds like it's trying to break out of your chest. you're halfway to the stairwell when you hear it. click.
a soft sound, your bedroom door opening. "baby?" your blood freezes. his voice is low. hoarse from sleep. confused.
BRRRRRRRRRRMMMMMMMMMMM.
the chainsaw roars to life behind you. you run. barefoot. down the stairs, through the lobby— slamming the building door open so hard the hinges scream. you don't stop. you run into the street, across the empty road, into the alley behind the café. panting. crying. shaking.
you hide behind the dumpster with your hands over your mouth. the smell makes you gag, but you don't care. anything to stay hidden. then you hear it, slow footsteps. not running. not chasing.
just coming, "you're faster than i thought."
you squeeze your eyes shut, his voice is closer now. "but you really thought you could run away from me?" the chainsaw hums. so much louder out here, so much louder when it's not a dream. "i forgave a lot, you know," his tone is soft. eerily calm. "you were mean to me. ignored me. locked me out. but i still protected you. still stayed. because i love you."
you don't move, you don't breathe. "and now you're out here... in the dark... like prey." you flinch when he stops walking, right on the other side of the dumpster. you see his boots, splattered with old blood. "so," he says, chainsaw purring. "do you wanna come home like a good girl?"
silence.
"or do i have to drag you?"
you start crying, soft—silent. but he hears it, of course he does. he steps around the dumpster fast and grabs you by the wrist. you scream, but it's cut off as he pins you to the wall.
"you said you were mine," his face is right there. eyes glowing in the moonlight. hair wild. the chainsaw still buzzing at his side. "you lied to me." "jungwon—" "no," he snarls. "you don't get to say my name like that after running." you try to push him off but he presses his body into yours— not to hurt. but to hold, to trap.
his mouth grazes your ear, "say it again." you look up at him with glossy eyes, confusion swirling through them, "w-what—" "say you're mine." you hesitate, he lifts the chainsaw and lets it rest just beside your cheek. not cutting, not yet. but close enough to smell the metal.
"say it," he whispers. "i'm—i'm yours," you stutter back, your chest heaving heavily as you break eye contact with him. he exhales, you could feel his grip on your poor wrist loosen. the blade shuts off, the weight of it disappears from your face.
he presses a kiss to your lips, soft. sickeningly sweet. "good girl."
he brings you home.
your knees scrape the concrete as he walks you backwards the whole way—never taking his eyes off you. never letting you fall too far behind. he carries you up the stairs and sets you gently on your bed. pulls the blanket over you like a lullaby, his voice is low—affectionate. "you don't run again," his voice is low with warning but his face remains sweet.  "o-okay..." he kisses your forehead, "not ever."
"you don't need anything else but me," he lies down beside you again, arms tight around your waist. you don't sleep, you can't. you just stare at the wall, breathing slow—pretending. pretending this is love, pretending you chose this.
you learn quickly, how to smile when he walks in. how to eat every bite of breakfast, even when your stomach turns. how to say "thank you, wonnie," like you mean it. he lights up every time, like you're the sun.
like nothing else matters, "see?" he says, wiping your mouth gently after breakfast one morning. "you're perfect when you listen." you smile but your hands shake under the table.
he leans in and kisses your cheek, "i knew you just needed time." you nod and he leaves your room for a few minutes. you finally breathe, you're surviving. you're obeying. you don't ask about your phone. you don't ask to go outside. you don't bring up your missing manager, or the way jungwon keeps your blinds drawn at all times.
you play your part. his perfect girl. because you're going to get out, eventually.
he brings you a new hoodie one night, your favorite color. "i bought it for you," he says, holding it out. "wanted you to have something soft again." you take it with a small smile, "thank you, wonnie."
he beams, "see? we're so good like this. no lies. no running." you nod and let him kiss you. soft. slow. like he's not the same boy who held a chainsaw to your face. his hand grazes your thigh and you freeze up. "i've been patient," he murmurs, voice dipped in honey. "but you know i want more than just cuddles."
you tense, he notices. but smiles like he doesn't. "don't worry," he says, brushing your hair back. "i won't take anything you're not ready to give." you let out a small breath of air you didn't know you were holding, "...okay."
"but if you ever lie again... if you ever try to leave me..." his hand tightens on your leg and his eyes darken. "i won't be gentle." he doesn't say how, he doesn't need to.
days pass, you shower with the door cracked. eat every meal he gives you. you sit on the couch while he lies with his head in your lap, fingers curling around your wrist like a leash. sometimes he talks about normal things like his childhood. the first devil he killed and how lonely he was before he found you.
"they only ever wanted the chainsaw," he says, eyes flicking to you. "not me." you stay quiet, listening to him intently. "but you smiled at me. before you knew what i was." he leans in, "you saw me."
you wonder what would've happened if you hadn't. if you'd just screamed like anyone else. would he have let you go? or would he have chased you anyway?
"you were mine the second i saw you," he whispers. "you just didn't know it yet.”
⛧⃝
you find a cracked tile in the kitchen and behind it, tucked into the wall—your emergency phone. hidden and dead, but there. you tuck it in your hoodie pocket when he's not looking. and you smile a little wider the next time he brings you tea. you're getting closer.
"you're different now," jungwon says one night, curled beside you in bed. "calmer. softer. like you were meant to be mine." you press your face into his chest, his heart is steady. but you feel it beneath the surface—the storm always ready to break.
"i think we should go away," he says softly. "somewhere quiet. just us. no one else." your breath hitches, dread filling you instantly, "wonnie—" "someplace with no devils. no people. no café. just you and me." he strokes your cheek lovingly,  "you'd like that, right?"
you nod, slow and obedient. his grip on you tightens, "say it." you whimper, his hold on you becoming increasingly stronger, "i'd like that." he grins, "say you want to be mine forever."
"i want to be yours forever." he kisses you and somewhere deep inside, you start to wonder if this is your life now. if pretending long enough becomes real. if loving your captor ever stops feeling like pretending.
⛧⃝
you should've hidden it better.
you knew the moment he walked in—the air around him colder, thicker, like it held its breath the second he did. he doesn't speak, not right away. he just stands in the doorway, one hand clenched at his side, the other holding something loose and familiar by the cord.
your phone, dead—cracked. but found.
"baby," his voice is even, quiet. like someone controlling their rage just enough not to shatter the walls. "is this yours?" your mouth goes dry, you don't answer. you don't need to, he already knows. "i asked you a question."
"...it was just—i didn't use it, i swear—" he throws it, hard. it hits the wall beside your head, plastic bursting into shards that scatter across the floor.
you flinch, he doesn't like that. "you lied to me." he stalks toward you, you back up. "you smiled in my face. you said all the right things. you fucking cuddled me," he snarls, his persona shifting rapidly. "wonnie, please—" he grabs your arm and yanks you forward. "i gave you everything. i let you live. and this is what you do?"
"i wasn't going to leave—" you begin. "—you were planning it." he throws you onto the couch, your back hits the cushions hard. your head whips back from the force. he's on you in an instant— knee between your thighs, hand around your throat. not tight, yet.
"you think this is a game?" he breathes. "you think i won't hurt you?" his smile is gone, the softness is gone, all that's left is heat. sharp and cracked and pulsing behind his eyes like a storm about to explode.
"you promised," he hisses, dragging his chainsaw across the carpet behind him, metal teeth glinting. "you told me you were mine."
"i—I am—" you cry out. "then act like it," his grip tightens on your throat. just enough to remind you who's in control. just enough to make your vision swim. "if you lie to me again," he whispers, lips brushing your ear, "i'll cut your legs off."
you choke, his thumb caresses your cheek like he's trying to soothe you—like he didn't just threaten to cripple you.
"then you won't be able to run," he presses a soft kiss beneath your eye. your tears catch on his lips. "you'll still be pretty," he murmurs softly, his eyes running down your face as tears spill from your eyes like a faucet. "and i'll carry you everywhere. like a doll. my little pet."
he releases your throat. you gasp, broken—and curl into yourself. he kneels down and brushes your hair back. "do you understand now?" you nod. "say it," he grits, his mouth pulled into a soft smile. "i—I understand."
"say you're sorry," his dimples appear, his fingers threading into your hair like a threat. "i'm sorry, wonnie." you swallow harshly, "say you'll never lie again."
"i'll never lie again." he kisses your forehead, smiling genuinely now. soft again, like none of it happened. "good girl," and with that he pulls you into his lap and rocks you slowly. like you're just scared, like he's the one keeping you safe.
you don't eat that night and he doesn't make you. you lie in bed, numb—while he watches you, brushing your hair behind your ear like you're still his favorite thing. you close your eyes, not to sleep but to disappear.
you wake up to sunlight and soft sheets, and jungwon. already awake, already watching you. "you slept so long," he says, brushing his thumb along your cheekbone. "you looked peaceful." you nod, you don't feel peaceful. your body still remembers the bruising grip of his hand around your throat and the weight of the chainsaw across your floor.
but you smile. because that's what he wants, he beams back. "you've been so good lately." he kisses your forehead, then your nose, then your lips. lingering.
"i was thinking..." he murmurs, kissing your jaw now, trailing down your neck. "maybe we're ready for more." your breath stutters, he pauses. "i'm not asking for much," he whispers. "just a little more. just... let me touch you." you freeze, "wonnie..."
"you trust me, don't you?" you nod. his hand slides beneath your shirt, palm warm against your stomach. he doesn't go further. just stays there, thumb brushing softly. "see?" he breathes."you're okay. you're doing so well." you want to push him off. but he's smiling again, glowing like the sun.
"you don't have to do anything," he says, lips grazing your ear. "but you want to make me happy, right?" you nod again, your mind racing. "then just let me hold you. touch you a little. i've been so good, haven't i?"
his hands roam—slow and restrained like he's controlling himself. like he's earning this, and you let him. because you don't know what happens if you don't.
he takes you into the kitchen later, arms still around your waist like a leash in disguise. "you look so pretty when you let me take care of you," he says, kissing your shoulder. "you're finally acting like mine."
you try not to flinch when he says it, you try not to cry. "you want to wear something cute for me today?" he asks, digging through one of the bags he brought home. "i got you new pajamas. soft ones. you'll like them." you nod carefully, because it's easier than saying no. because maybe if you give him this, he won't take more.
but he always wants more. at night, he pulls you into bed. spooning you from behind, face buried in your neck. you could feel him, feel him push into you  his hands explore again but softer this time, tracing your ribs, your hips.
his voice low and warm, "i think about you all the time," he whispers into your ear, his cool breath fanning the shell of your ear. "even when i'm out killing devils, i think about you. about how warm you are. how soft you sound when you say my name."
you don't say anything. "you make me feel human," he murmurs."no one's ever made me feel like that before." his hand dips beneath your waistband and you tense.
"wonnie—" he stills. "...it's okay," he says, voice gentle again. "i told you. i won't do anything you don't want." he kisses your shoulder and withdraws his hand. you let out a small breath, your eyes shutting in relief.
but his breath is heavier now, his chest rising faster against your back. "soon, though," he whispers. "you'll want it. i know you will." his arms tighten around you, "because i love you. and no one will ever love you like i do."
you sleep like that—caged in his arms, heart racing and you wonder how long you can keep this up before your own body betrays you.
because he's careful, he's patient and he's so good at making you feel safe right before he breaks you again.
⛧⃝
you've barely spoken all morning, you keep your head down and your answers short. you keep your distance, well, as much as you can when you're trapped in a small apartment with someone who watches you like he's afraid you'll disappear.
you feel it building. the way his jaw twitches when you look away too long. the way he starts pacing, slow and controlled. and when you finally say the words. soft, trembling, like a match against gasoline,  "i need some space, wonnie."
everything ignites.
"space?" his voice cracks like a whip. "what the fuck does that mean?" you step back but he follows. "after everything? after i saved you? after i've been patient and sweet and, fuck—soft with you?" you try to explain, voice small,  "i just—i need to clear my head, that's all. just a day or two—"
"you don't get a day or two," he slams his hand into the wall beside your head. not touching you—but close enough to make your ears ring. enough to make your heart stop. "you don't get to push me away. not after how hard i've tried. not after how good i've been." his eyes are wild and glassy. he's breathing hard.
"you smiled at me," he says, broken. "you kissed me. you told me i made you feel safe." you don't know what to say. because you meant it, initially. you just didn't mean for it to become this. "you made me hope," he whispers, a sharp kind of pain in his voice. "you made me think you loved me."
"i—I'm sorry, I didn't mean—" he cuts you off, "you did." he grabs your shoulders—hard and pulls you close, forehead pressed to yours. "don't make me beg, baby," his voice drops, desperate. "don't make me fucking beg you to stay."
you feel his body shake, you're not sure if it's from rage or heartbreak. maybe both. his lips brush yours, "say you love me," he whispers. you hesitate, just for a second. his hands tighten,  "say it."
"i love you," you breathe, barely audible. his whole body stills, then softens. he exhales like he's been holding his breath for years. "there's my girl," he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your cheek. "i knew you didn't mean it. i knew you were just scared."
he lifts you—literally picks you up and carries you to the bedroom like he's claiming what's his. "you don't need space," he says, laying you down. "you need me." he kisses you, slow and deep and wrong. his hands slide under your shirt again. but this time, you don't stop him—you can't. because you saw it, the split-second flicker behind his eyes.
the one that said: if you leave, i'll burn the whole world down.
⛧⃝
you wake up before him, you think. jungwon's arm is around your waist, heavy and warm. his breath tickles the back of your neck. you stay still for a moment, heart pounding.
then you slowly slip out of bed, he doesn't move.
you crush the sleeping pills into powder and stir them into the yogurt he left out for you. he always makes your breakfast now, always waits for you to eat the whole thing while he watches.
but today, you insist he eat it instead.
"you're always taking care of me," you say with a soft smile. "just let me take care of you for once, okay?" he melts and kisses your hand. "you're getting so sweet," he whispers lovestruck.
he finishes it all and now you wait. you watch the weight of sleep start to drag down his eyes. and when he slumps forward on the couch, arms loose, breathing heavy—you run.
you don't bring your broken and smashed up phone. don't bring clothes. you don't even grab your shoes. you just run barefoot, wild, breath sharp in your chest—through streets that still smell like blood and ash.
you don't know where you're going, you just know you have to be gone. but somewhere, hours later, in a small alley behind the metro station— you stop.
because it was too easy, you look behind you and feel sick. because there's no way jungwon would let you go that easily. he should've woken up. should've chased you.
you feel the shift before you see him, the air goes still—cold. and then: "you crushed the pills too fine." his voice is behind you, calm. close. "slipped into the yogurt perfectly though. smart girl." you turn and you see him leaning against the wall like he's been there all day. no chainsaw, no blood. just that same soft hoodie and a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.
"i wanted to see where you'd go," he says softly. "who you'd run to." he steps closer, you step back. "but you didn't call anyone," he laughs. "you didn't have a plan."
he tilts his head, staring down at you with an unreadable expression, "you just... ran." you say nothing and he smiles. "i should be mad," he moves closer again, voice lower now. "but honestly, it just makes me love you more." his hands slide into his pockets, "i mean, you didn't even really want to leave, did you?" he cocks his head to the side,  "you're scared. confused. but deep down, you know you belong with me."
your throat feels tight, "why are you here?" you whisper. "because you're mine," he shrugs. "and i figured i'd give you a head start. make it feel real." you feel yourself shake as you watch jungwon straighten up his posture, "but you're done now."
he closes the distance completely and presses his forehead to yours, "game's over, baby." you don't remember the walk back but you remember the pressure of his hand wrapped around your wrist. you remember the silence, tight and eerie—as jungwon guided you home like you were sleepwalking.
no yelling, no chainsaw. just a soft, lingering disappointment that cut deeper than violence ever could. "i gave you everything," he murmured once, almost to himself. "and you still ran."
back inside, the world feels smaller. every corner watched and every door locked. he sits you on the edge of the bed like a doll, crouches in front of you with his hands on your knees.
"it's okay," he says, almost as if he was trying to sympathize with you. "you're scared. i get it." he cups your cheek with aching tenderness. "you don't trust yourself yet. but i do. i always have." you stay still, silent.
his smile doesn't reach his eyes anymore, "so i'm going to help you," he whispers. "from now on, no more decisions, okay?" his hands slide down to your thighs, thumbs stroking softly. "you don't need to think anymore."
"i'll think for you."
he's not gentle that night. not with his kisses, not with his grip, not with his touch. he doesn't force you, never crosses that final line, but he doesn't ask either. he undresses you slowly, holds you down like a possession being reclaimed.
"you're mine," he says into your skin. "and i'm going to make sure you remember that." he kisses your stomach, your hips. then dips a brush into black ink and paints his name in neat hangul letters just above your heart.
"jungwon," he says, smiling like it's a wedding vow. "belongs to." he stares at it for a long time, then at you. "i'll do it permanently soon," he whispers.
"carve it if i have to."
the next morning, your phone is gone. your shoes are gone. "just until you stop panicking," jungwon explains while brushing your hair. "you'll thank me later." you don't speak, you don't dare look at him in the eyes.
"you're doing so well," he says sweetly, his voice chirpy. "you're already so much more obedient." he kisses your shoulder, "soon you won't even want to leave." and somehow, that's what scares you the most. you wake up in his bed again, it was no longer yours. but this time, the warmth is gone. the sheets are tucked tighter and jungwon is sitting in the corner of the room—watching.
his eyes are soft, his smile is small but something in the air has shifted. you know he's not going to ask anymore. "did you sleep well?" he says softly, you nod. your throat is dry and the feeling of dread consumes you slowly.  "good," he murmurs, standing slowly. "because we're starting over now."
he walks toward you with slow, steady steps. "the way i see it..." he sits beside you, brushing hair behind your ear, "you weren't ready to make decisions. so i'm taking that pressure off you." he leans in, "you don't need to think anymore," he smiles at you, like he was making your life easier. "you don't need to want anything. i'll do all that for you."
you feel the weight of it settle in your chest like stone, but you nod.
he doesn't leave the house that day. or the day after. he cooks for you, feeds you, bathes you— always watching. the door stays locked, your phone is gone and the television plays static or nothing at all. every time you hesitate, he tilts his head and says: "are you forgetting what happened when i let you choose?"
and every time, you swallow your pride and obey.
on the third day, you cry. quietly, in the bathroom, with the sink running, he knocks once. "are you done?" his voice had began to suffocate you. "or do you need me to come help?" you wipe your face and open the door. he kisses your temple like you've done something good. "see? progress."
at night, he holds you like you're his peace. arms wrapped tight, breath steady on the back of your neck. "i forgive you, you know," he whispers. "for trying to run." you stay still, you stay quiet.  "but you'll never get that chance again," he presses a kiss to your shoulder. "next time you try to leave, i won't be this gentle."
you stop counting the days. at first, it was just survival—getting through one morning, one meal, one long, quiet night curled up in jungwon's arms like a prisoner pretending she wants to be held. but soon, it gets harder to remember how long it's been.
the clocks have disappeared from the walls and jungwon's answers when you ask what time it is, what day it is— always come with a soft smile. "does it matter?" he'd say. "you're safe now. that's all you need to know."
he brings home clothes for you now. long skirts. soft sweaters, white lace trimmed with ribbons. you'd flush a deep red when you'd discover the lacy and raunchy undergarments you'd find at the bottom of the bags.
"you look better like this," he murmurs as he zips one dress up slowly behind you. "like you're already mine." he takes your picture, just one and prints it and pins it to the fridge. "our beginning," he whispers. "the real one."
you don't ask what that means but he keeps calling this the start of something. keeps saying you're going to be so happy soon.
he cooks every meal himself, won't let you touch the knives. won't let you wash dishes, he says the soap dries out your hands. you sit at the table and eat the food he plates for you, always arranged into little shapes—hearts, stars, flowers made from rice or sliced fruit.
"i want everything around you to be soft," he tells you one afternoon. "no more sharp things. no more running." his hand comes down gently on your thigh. "you don't need the outside world. you don't even like it out there, do you?"
you hesitate, his grip tightens slightly. "do you?" his voice carried a warning.  "...no," you say. he smiles, "good girl."
at night, he talks about the future. his voice is warm, sweet, dangerous. "we'll get married soon," he says, fingers playing with yours beneath the covers. "it doesn't have to be legal. just real. just ours."
"i can fix up the spare room. make it a nursery, maybe. or just a space for you to paint. you like painting, right?" you don't answer, you're not sure anymore. "and when you're ready..." he leans in closer, breath fanning over your cheek, "i want to give you a baby."
you flinch but he doesn't react.
"you'd be so good at it," he murmurs. "i'll take care of everything. you won't have to lift a finger." he continues, "you'll never have to be afraid again."
you try to keep track of your thoughts. you write on napkins and hide them under the mattress. little scraps of memory: my name is __ he has a chainsaw. no. he is the chainsaw i don't want to be here not safe but by the next morning, they're gone and jungwon is extra affectionate that day. "you were talking in your sleep again," he says while brushing your hair. "sounded like you were having a nightmare."
his hand cups the back of your neck, "i got rid of it for you." you nod, because what else can you do?
one night, after a particularly quiet dinner, he asks if you're feeling okay. you nod, he studies you. "you're not lying to me, right?" he asks, his brows scrunching in concern. "you'd tell me if something was wrong?" you hesitate for half a second too long and just like that, the softness slips. he grabs your chin, not hard, but enough to make you freeze.
"i need to know you're happy," he whispers, voice trembling with something sharp and volatile beneath it. "because if you're not, then i must be doing something wrong. and i can't—i won't fail you again."
his pupils are blown wide, his breath stutters. his hand shakes slightly as he releases you. "...say you're happy." you swallow the lump in your throat, "i'm happy."
he exhales like he just pulled you back from a cliff. he pulls you into his lap and holds you tight. "see? i knew you'd feel it eventually."he presses a kiss to the side of your head, "we're just getting started."
it starts small, a hand on your thigh when he's reading beside you. a kiss on your shoulder before bed, lips lingering longer than before. fingers brushing the curve of your spine when he helps you change clothes.
"you're so soft," he whispers one morning, hand tracing your bare leg under the blanket. "i never get tired of touching you." you stay still, your eyes on the ceiling.
he doesn't go further, well, not yet.but the weight of his desire hangs heavy in the air now. like heat in a locked room with no windows.
he lets you bathe alone for the first time in days. but when you come out, towel wrapped tightly around yourself, he's standing in the doorway with a folded nightgown and a smile. "you forgot your clothes," he says sweetly.
you take the time to look at him, blonde fluffy hair, porcelain skin, dimples, a warm smile and doe eyes. if things were different and he wasn't a delusional psychopath then maybe jungwon would've been your dream man. however, he is a delusional psychopath and this is a nightmare.
"you must've been distracted," he cooed softly. you try to take the gown from him, but he steps in close. slowly, carefully—he starts dressing you himself. like you're porcelain, like you'll shatter if he moves too fast. his fingers graze your bare skin, your collarbones, your hips.
he doesn't touch where he shouldn't, but he touches everywhere else. "you're so good for me now," he murmurs. "so quiet. so calm. i can feel it...you're finally starting to love me." you open your mouth—to object, maybe. or scream. cry.
but nothing comes out and jungwon just smiles. "that's okay. you don't have to say it. i already know."
that night, he holds you closer. one arm locked around your waist, the other trailing slow circles over your stomach, your ribs, the swell of your chest through your shirt.
"this is mine," he says softly, his fingertip dancing right over your chest. "every part of you is mine." you flinch when he presses a kiss just below your ear—gentle, reverent. but he doesn't stop.
"i could make you feel so good," he breathes. "you don't even have to do anything. just... let me." his hand slips beneath your shirt, warmer now. firmer. but still slow, still soft. he's waiting for a word, maybe a sound—anything.
and when you don't give it, he pauses. just for a second. "not yet?" he says, like he's disappointed in himself. "that's okay. i can wait. i'll wait forever if i have to." he nuzzles into your hair, kissing the back of your neck. "but one day," he murmurs, voice lower now—dangerous. "you're going to want it."
the next morning, you wake up to find he's changed all the sheets. the house smells like vanilla and warmth. breakfast is waiting with your favorite drink sitting by your plate.
"i want today to be special," he says, glee present on his handsome face. "you've been so good lately." you force a smile, but your hands shake when you hold the glass. you know what's coming, you can feel it.
he's not going to stop until you say yes. and you're starting to wonder what will happen when you finally do.
the day turns out to be quiet, something you weren't expecting—but you weren't complaining.
no chainsaw noises from the basement. no news playing in the background. no scraping of locks or clattering of breakfast dishes.
just silence.
and the faint scent of jasmine in the hallway. you step out of the bedroom cautiously, bare feet on the cold wood floor. the apartment is different, candles line the floor, flickering soft gold. petals—real, crushed, pink and red are scattered like breadcrumbs from your room to the living room.
and in the center of it all—jungwon. in a clean white shirt, hair brushed, lips pink. smiling at you like you're the sun returning after years of rain.
"happy honeymoon," he says gently.
you don't answer. you just stand there, frozen, trying to make sense of what's real. "i know it's silly," he laughs, rubbing the back of his neck, "but i wanted to do something special. you've been so good for me. i wanted to thank you."
he walks over slowly, reaching for your hand. you let him take it, because what else is there to do? "sit down," he murmurs. "let me take care of everything tonight."
he serves you dinner at the table. pasta—your favourite, garlic bread, wine and dessert. you don't ask how he got it all and you don't dare ask if it's drugged. you just eat and he watches with stars in his eyes.
"this is what i always wanted," he says. "just us. no fear. no noise. no one getting in the way." he reaches across the table and laces his fingers through yours. "don't you feel it now?" he asks softly. "how good we could be, if you stopped pretending you didn't want me?"
your throat closes. he's still smiling—but it's tighter now. thinner. "i know you want me," he says again, a strange look on his face. "you've always wanted me." his hand slides over your knuckles, slow and steady."even when i scare you. even when i hurt people for you. even when you try to run."
"you always come back."
you want to pull away, but he's already standing. "don't worry," he whispers, bending down behind your chair. "i won't rush you." his hands slip onto your shoulders and his lips find your neck. you freeze. "you're mine," he murmurs against your skin. "every piece of you. and tonight, i want to show you what that means."
you don't remember how you get to the bedroom. but suddenly you're there—lights low, sheets fresh, jungwon kneeling at the foot of the bed. "take this off for me?" he whispers, brushing your shirt. "please?" you hesitate, he tilts his head.
"i said please," he repeats. "don't make me beg." his voice is still soft—still velvet. but there's something under it now, something sharp and heavy and impatient. you reach for the hem of your shirt with shaking fingers, he watches every movement like it's holy.
"that's it," he breathes. "that's my girl." you pause when it's off—bra still on, arms crossed hiding what you can. he doesn't push, just leans forward and presses a single kiss to your ribs.
"i won't do anything you don't want," he says gently. "but you do want me, don't you?" your silence hangs too long and jungwon sighs—quiet, frustrated, before leaning up and kissing you fully on the mouth.
slow. wet. deep.
he tastes like wine and something unplaceable—warm, overwhelming, dangerous. when he pulls back, he whispers: "you're lying to yourself."
that night, he touches you everywhere but where you dread. hands tracing over your stomach, your thighs, the backs of your knees, your spine. he worships your body like it belongs to him—like you've always belonged to him. and when he finally falls asleep beside you, arms locked tight around your waist, you realize something terrifying: you almost leaned into it.
for just a second, you wanted him to keep going. not because you love him, not because you're ready. but because it would be easier than saying no again.
your eyes are still open when he stirs beside you, the warmth of his breath hitting your shoulder. "can't sleep?" he whispers, voice thick with softness and sleep. you don't respond, his arm tightens around your waist, tugging you closer. you can feel the weight of his chest against your back—steady, calm, alive.
"you're tense," he murmurs. "i can feel it. right here—" his hand glides over your stomach slowly, resting low, too low. you swallow hard. "i want to help you," he says. "let me?"
you shake your head, barely a movement—barely even a sound. but he catches it, "shh, it's okay. i'm not asking for anything. i just want to make you feel good." he kisses the back of your neck—slowly, reverently.
"you've done so much for me," he whispers, each word like silk against your skin. "you've been so brave. so patient. you let me love you even when you didn't know how." his hand slips lower and you tense—not quite fighting, not quite yielding. "you deserve to feel safe," he breathes. "to feel... pleasure. let me give that to you. just once."
his fingers toy with the waistband of your shorts. "i won't ask for anything back," he promises. "i won't even kiss you unless you want it." suddenly your no longer on your side when jungwon spooning you. he's looming over you now, his blonde locks falling over his face as he cages you between his arms.
he shifts to kneel between your legs, gently nudging them apart—slowly, like you're breakable. you don't stop him, you don't say yes either.
you just lie there, frozen in place, as he pulls your shorts down and presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh—soft, reverent, desperate. you hold in the urge to squeeze your legs together in attempts to hide yourself from his gaze. you could tell how pleased he was, the evidence was poking the back of your thigh. you saw his tongue jut out to wet his lips, his eyes never leaving the thin lace material that covered you.
"i've wanted this for so long," he whispers. "to taste you. to feel you fall apart for me." he leans down, his stomach on the bed and his hands gripping your thighs—prying them apart. his breath fans over your core, and you flinch but still don't move. he glances up at you once, dark eyes gleaming in the candlelight.
"you're shaking," he murmurs. "it's okay. i've got you." he lands a soft kiss where you felt it most, over the fabric. you stiffen at the feeling, your core throbbing as you watch jungwon push your panties to the side.
then, he leans in. his mouth is warm, soft, slow. he doesn't rush. his tongue slides down your slit, grazing your clit ever so slightly. you tremble, pursing your lips to hold back any moans from escaping. your eyes roll to the back of your head when he pushes your thighs back completely and begins to, what you coukd only describe, as making out with your cunt.
he kisses like he's praying—like every flick of his tongue is an offering. his tongue laves against you, sucking after ever kiss and swipe of his tongue. he doesn't allow his attention to fall anywhere else, focusing on your clit.
he hums against you when your hips twitch, when your thighs tremble. "that's it," he breathes. "just let go. just for me." you couldn't help but let soft moans escape your mouth, mentally cursing yourself.
you gasp, quiet, helpless—fingers curling into the sheets. you could feel the knot in your stomach begin to tight with every flick of his tongue. and he moans like he's the one coming undone.
"so sweet," he mutters. "so fucking mine." when your legs close around his head, he lets them and doesn't stop. he just holds you there, mouth relentless, tongue deep and slow, devouring like it's the only way to live.
you cry out when you feel your high wash over you, your body shaking and jungwon moans into you—helping you ride it out. when you finish—shaking, breath caught in your throat, he doesn't say anything at first. he just lays his head on your thigh, breathing hard.
"i love you," he says softly. "even if you don't say it back. i'll wait." he kisses the inside of your knee. "but one day... you will."
⛧⃝
you stop noticing the time. you don't know if it's morning or night anymore, because the lights are always dimmed, the curtains always drawn. outside, the city could be burning and you wouldn't know. inside, jungwon touches you like he's trying to make you forget it exists.
he doesn't ask anymore.
not for permission. not for your attention. not even for your affection. he wakes before you most days, tucked warm under the blankets, mouth already between your legs—worshipping like it's a habit. like it's his version of good morning.
and you don't fight it, you barely even flinch. you just stare at the ceiling, mouth dry, fingers limp in the sheets while his tongue works you open with slow, languid patience. sometimes he moans when you twitch. sometimes he whispers things, sweet, sinful things—into the skin of your thighs.
"that's it, baby..."
"let me taste what's mine..."
"i love waking you up like this. you're always so wet for me..."
he never asks you to touch him in return, never forces your hand. never begs for more. but the way he looks at you after, wide-eyed, breathless, expectant—makes your skin crawl. like he's waiting, like he's trying not to snap.
you catch him staring more, when you're reading on the couch. when you're brushing your hair. when you laugh a little too long at something on TV. he watches like he's memorizing every detail, but not out of love—out of fear.
fear that you'll slip away. fear that you'll wake up and run. fear that what he's built here, this dream, this trap—will shatter.
"do you like it here?" he asks one night. you nod, because you have to. because your voice doesn't work the way it used to. "you're quiet lately," he adds, brushing your cheek. "you used to fight more." you glance away, "i miss that fire," he says softly, lips brushing your ear. "but this version of you... i like her too. soft. obedient. mine."
you feel something hollow open in your chest.
you try to plan, when he leaves for a supply run. when he showers with the door locked. when he naps after eating you out until your legs give out. you think about doors, windows, stairwells. you think about timing, about pills, about hiding money in the lining of your coat.
you think about running, but then you remember the chainsaw. you remember the way he looked, blood-drenched and smiling—the night he saved you. you remember the sound it made when he turned it on, and how easily it tore through bone.
"you're mine," he had whispered that night. "you smiled at me first. you don't get to take that back."
sometimes, when you lie awake pretending to sleep, he wraps his arms around you and murmurs things into your hair. "i know you're still scared," he says. "but one day you'll understand this is love," he continues. "one day, you'll thank me for saving you."
he kisses your neck, "you'll see. you'll see. you'll see—" and you lie there, still as death, wondering if maybe you never smiled at all.
⛧⃝
you start with small things. a bottle of water hidden behind the back panel of the bathroom cabinet. a wad of cash that you had gathered from around the house tucked beneath a loose floorboard by the bed. a sweater rolled tight and pushed into the gap under the couch.
jungwon doesn't notice, he still looks at you like you're the only thing in the world worth breathing for. like your smile was the last good thing left in a ruined city.
and so you smile, you kiss him goodnight. you let him between your thighs when he wakes up needy. you even tell him he tastes sweet when he presses soft kisses into your skin and hums like he belongs there. "i love when you say things like that," he whispers, licking his lips. "you're finally getting it."
but he doesn't notice the way your hands shake when you cook. he doesn't notice the extra pills you keep hidden in the lining of your hoodie pocket. he doesn't notice that this time—when you crush them into his tea you don't take his advice.
you don't make it fine, you make it heavy—potent. enough to keep him down. "you sure you don't want any?" he asks, sipping the tea, eyes soft. you shake your head, "already brushed my teeth." he laughs and taps your chin with his thumb, "so good for me now."
he falls asleep earlier than usual. his breathing turns deep, chest rising and falling with slow, heavy rhythm. you wait, 20 minutes, then 30. then another 10, just to be sure.
you press your fingers to his neck, pulse thick and sluggish. he's out. you move quickly, silently. coat. money. water. shoes. you skip the sweater under the couch—too risky. your heart's hammering in your chest as you step over the threshold, fingers closing around the doorknob, twisting it slowly—
click.
the door creaks and you freeze. jungwon doesn't stir. you slip into the hallway, pulling the door shut behind you with a soft click. you don't breathe until you've made it down the first two flights of stairs. the city is cold tonight, silent. the kind of quiet that makes you feel watched.
but you keep going, you don't look back. 2 blocks down, you finally stop. your hands are shaking and your legs are numb. but you made it, you got out. just before you could do your happy dance, your dreams shatter.
"where are you going, baby?"
your blood runs cold. his voice was soft, gentle, sweet—floats in from the mouth of the alley behind you. you turn, he's standing there in the shadows, hands at his sides. still in his sleep shirt, barefoot and smiling.
"you didn't really think i drank it, did you?" he asks. he takes one slow step forward. "you think i'd sleep through you slipping around like that? hiding things from me? lying to me?" his tone doesn't rise, he doesn't shout. he doesn't need to. he just looks at you like you broke his fucking heart.
"i let you go," he whispers. "i watched you walk out. i gave you a chance." another step."and now i know." you step back, shaking. "now i know you'll run from me every time." he tilts his head, voice dropping. "so i'm not gonna let you anymore."
then, his arm shifts. you hear the click and suddenly, it's there. the chainsaw. not in his hand—but part of it. the metal gleams under the streetlight, slick and humming.
his smile is still soft, his voice is still calm. but there's something in his eyes now—something raw, betrayed, unhinged. "you said you were mine," he says. "even if you didn't say it out loud, you let me inside you. you let me love you." he lifts the chainsaw—not revving it, just holding it. like a warning, like a leash.
"so now you're not leaving," he says. "i'll make sure of it." you don't scream, even as jungwon grabs you by the wrist. even as he yanks you into his chest, cradles your head, and whispers, "it's okay, i've got you." even as the cold metal of the chainsaw brushes against your side like a threat he doesn't even have to say aloud.
"you're shaking," he murmurs, brushing your hair back. "are you cold? scared? don't be. we're going home." he's gentle, that's the worst part. he doesn't drag you down the alley—he guides you, arm wrapped around your waist, chin resting on your shoulder like this is all just some sad misunderstanding.
"i gave you everything," he breathes. "i touched you like you were sacred." you don't reply, you can't. he smells like warm skin and blood and something sharp, like metal. "and you still ran from me."
he doesn't say another word until the door shuts behind you, your coat is stripped off. your bag is kicked aside and then you're in the living room again—where the lights are too dim and the air smells like stale sweat and sleep and him.
he lets go, lets you fall onto the couch like a dropped doll. you sit there, frozen. he disappears into the kitchen, comes back a moment later with the tea cup you'd drugged. "this," he says, holding it up, "was cute." he sets it on the table in front of you, "you really thought that'd work again?"
he crouches in front of you, slow, fluid, tilting his head like he's studying you. "you've been lying to me," he says, not angry but hurt. "smiling. moaning. kissing me back. and it was all fake." you open your mouth to deny it, but he grabs your chin fast—firm but not rough.
"don't," he snaps. "don't lie again. not now." his hand shakes. "you let me taste you," he whispers, eyes shining. "you let me fall in love with your body. your sounds. the way you twitch when i kiss your clit just right," you flinch at his words. "and then you tried to disappear."
his voice breaks, barely above a whisper and he leans in closer. "do you have any idea what that does to me?" and for the first time in weeks—you see it. not the softness, not the sweetness. but the madness underneath it.
he kisses you suddenly—hard, desperate, messy. like he's trying to prove something. "you're never doing that again," he mutters against your lips. "i won't let you run. i won't let anyone take you." his hands skim your sides, up your ribs, pressing too tight. you shove at him and he freezes. he looks at you, really looks at you. like he wants to be good, like he wants to stop. but then he closes his eyes, breathing hard, and says: "you made me like this."
and then he gets up disappears into the hallway. comes back with a knife in hand—still silent, not pointed at you, but there. a threat. you failed to understand why his weapon of choice was a knife and not his arm, the chainsaw.
he sets it on the table, right next to the tea cup. "i don't want to hurt you," he says, voice soft again. "but you don't get to hurt me either."
that night, you sleep in the same bed. his arms around you, his breath warm on your neck. the knife flat against the nightstand like it belongs there. he didn't want to use himself as a weapon against you, it made sense to you now.
and in the dark, as he kisses the back of your shoulder and murmurs "mine, mine, mine" into your skin—you realize something.
you're not planning your next escape, you're planning his destruction.
he falls asleep fast. one arm around your waist, face pressed between your shoulder blades, murmuring quiet, broken apologies into your skin like he thinks he deserves forgiveness just for feeling sorry.
"don't leave me again."
"you belong with me. you know that."
"i'll be good. better. just stay."
but you're not listening. you're watching the knife where it rests beside the bed. the quiet metallic hum still rings in your ears. his arm is normal, it doesn't glow, doesn't breathe, but it feels as if the chainsaw is there and alive. like a part of him that can't ever really be turned off. you wonder if he'd use it on you if you tried to run again, he had threatened you with it before. why not now? will he again in the future? you wonder if he'd cry afterward.
i let you go. i gave you a chance.
you close your eyes, breathe. you've never felt more trapped. there's no one left to call. your parents are dead, your phone is still gone. your coworkers think you're in love and the city outside is worse than he is—filled with devils that eat humans whole.
jungwon saved you from that, he reminds you of it every time he eats you out in the morning. every time he kisses your throat and whispers, "i'm the only reason you're still breathing."
and the worst part? he's right.
but tonight, you feel something shift. the numbness doesn't feel so hollow anymore. it feels like stone1-something you could carve a plan into, something hard enough to carry hate. you lie still for hours, eyes open, mind racing. you imagine stabbing him in his sleep, burning the apartment down with him inside.
you picture it all—every version of his death. you imagine your hands slick with his blood and your heart finally beating without fear. but there's a problem, you don't know how to kill a devil.
especially not your devil. the next morning, you smile. you kiss him when he wakes you up by sliding under the sheets and parting your thighs like it's his god-given right. you moan when his mouth closes over you. you say thank you when he finishes, even though your chest is hollow and your eyes don't match your lips.
he doesn't notice. he nuzzles into your side like he's proud of himself, like he thinks love still lives here. "you're so good for me now," he murmurs, kissing your ribs. "knew you'd come around."
you stroke his hair and you start to lie. not the small lies, the ones he's used to. but new ones. cold ones. dangerous ones. you start to ask questions with wide eyes, "what would happen if you got sick?" or "are chainsaw people immune to poison?" and "how does the chainsaw part work again?"
he answers them, slowly—suspiciously. but you're careful, you let him eat you out whenever he wants. you cook for him, you hold his hand. you say "i missed you" when he comes home even though you never left the apartment. "i'm happy now," you tell him one night. "i think i was scared before. but i'm not anymore."
he watches you closely, he doesn't believe you—not fully. but he wants to and you let that desire blind him. because underneath your smile, your skin, your warmth—you're already planning the kill.
"baby," he says, voice low from the kitchen, "come sit." you don't hesitate. not even when you see what he's made—pancakes, eggs, sausage. your favorite, but that's not what matters. it's the two plates on the table, identical. his and yours but he hasn't touched his yet and he's watching you.
"i thought you'd be hungry," he murmurs, running his fingers along your chair as he pulls it out. "figured you needed something warm. grounding." you sit and you thank him. he sits too—and then folds his hands. he's not eating, you pick up your fork. "go on," he says, smiling. "i made it with love."
your stomach tightens, he's testing you. because of the pills, because of that time you cooked. you glance down at your plate, it smells fine, it looks perfect. but that's what he said about you once. you chew slowly, you swallow. he watches every bite.
"you've been so sweet lately," he says after a moment, eyes soft. "it's nice." he picks up his fork. takes one small bite from his own plate. chews, swallows, sets the fork down again. "but you know what they say." he leans forward. "sweet girls can be liars."
you smiles—soft, demure, every inch the broken little thing he thinks you are now."i'm not lying." he grins, "mm." he tilts his head. "then prove it." you blink, he reaches into his hoodie pocket and pulls out a small vial—clear liquid. viscous. almost glowing.
"this is devil toxin," he says, voice still gentle. "you only need a drop. just one." your chest turns to ice. "you want to show me you're loyal?" he sets the vial beside your cup of tea. "drink it." you stare at it, "jungwon—" his grin gets wider, "i'll suck it out of you if it hurts," he whispers, smiling too wide. "you know i'll take care of you. don't you trust me?"
no. never: but you can't say that. you wrap your hand around the teacup, the vial sits beside it like a promise. he leans in, "prove it," he whispers again. your heart hammers in your throat and slowly—so slowly, you lift the vial and tip one drop into the tea.
it hisses, even smokes a little. but doesn't change color, you drink. you smile; you don't die.
he exhales and you know two things immediately: 1. it wasn't enough to kill you. 2. next time, it might be.
"good girl," he says, voice filled with something almost tender. "you're getting so good at being mine." he kisses your temple, you hold your breath. and you think: i have to kill him first. the knock comes mid-morning, you're still shaking from the tea—not because of the toxin, but because of what it meant.
jungwon had to see you drink it, he wanted to watch. your loyalty, served hot. and now he's humming in the kitchen like he didn't just force you to poison yourself. the knock comes again, "package," a voice calls through the door. "from the devil patrol."
you flinch, jungwon wipes his hands on a towel, glancing toward the door. "ah. that's the neighbor." neighbor? you didn't know you had one. he opens the door and greets him like they're friends. "yo," jungwon says, too casual. "thanks. was wondering when that would come."
"no problem, man." the guy is young, tall and lean wearing a battered jacket with the devil patrol emblem stitched to the chest. "i figured i'd drop it off personally. lots of freaks running around this district lately."
you step closer, jungwon doesn't look back—but he knows you're there. you can feel it in the way his body stiffens. "she's cute," the neighbor says suddenly, peeking past him. you freeze, jungwon doesn't. he laughs, a soft, too-sweet laugh.
"yeah," he says. "she's mine." his. not my girlfriend. not my partner. just mine. the guy raises his hands, "damn. got it."
but you make eye contact with him, just for a second. your eyes plead and your hand trembles. and you manage to take one single step forward before jungwon subtly presses a hand behind his back—where you know the chainsaw can come out, just out of view.
the guy pauses, his eyes flicker between you and jungwon. he opens his mouth—then closes it again. "take care," he mutters, handing the box over. "she's lucky to have you."
jungwon smiles and slams the door shut, the silence afterward is unbearable. you turn, but he's already behind you. smiling, still smiling. but it's not real, not this time. "you looked at him," he says softly. "like i wasn't standing right here."
you swallow, "jungwon—" "did you want him to help you?" he steps forward. "was that your plan?" you immediately shake your head, "i didn't—"
"or was it just fun?" he grabs your face, gentle but unyielding. "flirting like that in front of me? after everything i've done for you?" his voice stays even, calm—like this is just a conversation. but his fingers press harder against your jaw. "i let you live," he says quietly. "i let you eat, sleep, breathe."
"you said you loved me—"
"i do." his voice breaks slightly, but his eyes don't. "and i'll kill for you. i'll kill you, if you make me." you don't cry, you don't flinch, you just stare. because for the first time, you understand— jungwon isn't trying to win you over anymore. he already thinks you belong to him.
now he's just making sure you don't forget it. "i let you eat, sleep, breathe," his voice still echoes in your head. he's watching you now, silent, the way a storm watches a city before it floods. you sit on the edge of the bed, he hasn't moved since the neighbor left and you haven't either.
until finally, "get up," he says. "on your knees." you blink, "jungwon—" "you wanted him, didn't you?" his voice is deceptively soft, like he's sad. like you hurt him. "you looked at him like that on purpose. i'm not stupid."
you shake your head, "no—i didn't—" "then prove it." he takes a step forward and you tense. he crouches in front of you, kneels down, and cups your face with both hands. his thumbs brush under your eyes like he's checking for lies. "say sorry." you do, but it's not enough. "mean it." "i do—"
he tsk's, "then make it up to me," his voice dips. low, needy, possessive. "you're mine. you said it. you live here. you sleep in my bed. so act like it." he pushes you back onto the mattress—not rough, but assertive. it happens so fast you barely register it. his hands go under your shirt, he mouths at your neck and you shiver. "i don't want anything from you," he whispers, breath hot against your skin. "i just need to feel you. need to know you're still here. still mine."
his mouth moves lower, "you're not allowed to want anyone else. you understand that, right?" you nod. he doesn't see, so you say it. "yes."
"say you're mine."
"i'm yours."
"say you'll never leave me again."
your heart stutters, his tongue is already sliding between your thighs. "say it."
"i won't—i won't leave you." he groans like your promise is something holy. "good girl," he whispers, voice dark. "then take it." he doesn't ask for anything in return, not tonight. but his mouth is relentless—all-consuming. obsessive. he makes you cum twice, never breaking eye contact. every twitch, every moan, every desperate gasp is proof that you're his.
after, when you're limp and shaky, he pulls you into his lap and strokes your hair. "see?" he murmurs. "you don't need anyone else." you don't answer and you don't sleep. because you know now—he's getting too comfortable.
you were always a prize, but now you're a possession and there's no version of this story where he lets you go.
⛧⃝
it starts the night he falls asleep with his arm over your waist, breath warm against your neck, fingers curled loosely around your wrist like a shackle he forgot he was holding. you stay still until his breathing evens out. until the weight of his presence stops pressing and starts simply existing.
then, slowly, carefully—you slide out of his hold. your bare feet hit the floor without a sound. the apartment is silent except for the ticking of that damn broken clock on the kitchen wall. the one jungwon refuses to fix. "i like how it always says 3 a.m.," he told you once. "feels like time stops when we're together." you believed him then, now you're not so sure.
you pull on one of his oversized shirts—not because you want to, but because your own clothes are gone. thrown out weeks ago after your little 'drugging my tea' incident.
"you don't need them," he said. "you look better in mine." the kitchen is cold, your fingertips skim the edges of drawers, cabinets, picture frames. you don't know what you're looking for until you find it. a panel behind the bottom bookshelf — barely noticeable, like someone meant to hide it. you pry it open.
inside: a leather-bound notebook, pages yellowed, brittle, ink smudged with time. you flip it open. "chainsaw devil sighted in busan. not a contract. a merger." your blood runs cold. page after page, detailed logs from a devil hunter. someone who knew what jungwon became, someone who saw it happen.
"the chainsaw devil doesn't just make pacts," one entry reads. "it devours. it possesses. it feasts on obsession—especially the kind that pretends to be love." you keep reading, "once the host gives in emotionally, there's no going back. the only way to break the bond is through emotional rejection —but it has to be real. the host has to willingly sever the tie. anything else just strengthens it."
your hands shake, jungwon didn't choose this. he wasn't born like this, he was consumed. maybe still is. you think of the way he touches you now—like he's entitled to it. like your body is a ritual, not a person. you think of waking up with his mouth already between your thighs, his eyes glassy with need, saying: "you're the only thing that keeps me human."
you think of how your skin feels like it doesn't belong to you anymore. you snap the journal shut. and then—"baby?"
you freeze, his voice is sleepy. rough. too close. you turn and see that he's standing in the doorway, shirtless, rubbing his eyes. there's a red imprint on his cheek from your pillow.
"why're you up?" he murmurs. "bed's cold." you grip the notebook behind your back. "i couldn't sleep." he steps closer, you keep your expression neutral. "i missed you," he says, gaze soft but unreadable. "come back." you smile, it's fake, but it's practiced.
"yeah. okay." he kisses your temple and leads you back to bed. he wraps himself around you like he never plans to let go. and you think: he won't. you clutch the journal tighter, you have a weapon now. you just don't know how to use it yet.
"what were you doing in the kitchen last night?" you freeze mid-pour, the sound of tea spilling into your mug suddenly too loud. jungwon's voice is quiet—not soft, not this time. it lingers in the doorway like smoke, head tilted just slightly, that permanent kind expression resting too gently on his face.
you don't look up, "i thought i heard something," you answer. "like... rattling. maybe the wind." you pray he buys it. jungwon hums, the sound low, almost thoughtful. he moves to stand behind you, arms sliding around your waist, cheek resting against your temple. you're not comforted. "funny," he murmurs. "i didn't hear anything."
"you were sleeping," you try to brush off. "i always hear you." you tense, barely—but he catches it. "you're lying to me, aren't you?" your heart stutters, you try to laugh, force a small smile. "seriously? i got a glass of water." he pulls back just enough to meet your eyes. there's something flat in his stare now, calculating.
"didn't i tell you before?" he whispers. "if there's anything bothering you, you can tell me. i'll take care of it." you just smile softly, "i'm fine." he doesn't look convinced, his brows furrowed, "hm." he lets you go, but his gaze lingers.
you're more careful now. you return the notebook the next morning when he goes out to the market —nestling it back behind the false panel, just as you found it. you wipe the edges of the bookshelf, brush your hair. smile when he returns, arms full of fresh fruit and tofu and the cheap little candies you once told him you liked.
"you remembered," you say, voice light. "of course i did." that afternoon, you read in the sunlit living room while he showers. you turn a page, eyes scanning the text—but your mind is somewhere else entirely.
he didn't believe you, you know it and worse—you saw him change. not visibly. not all at once. but the way his fingers twitched against your wrist, as if resisting the urge to tighten. the way his smile didn't quite reach his eyes when you lied to him. the way he kissed your neck that morning, slower than usual, lingering like a warning.
he's spiralling, and so are you.
later that night, you pretend to sleep. jungwon moves around the apartment in near-silence. you feel him pause by the bookshelf. hear the low creak of wood shifting. the telltale scrape of the false panel opening. you keep your breathing steady, shallow. you wait, your heart beating in anticipation.
there's a long pause, then the soft thump of the panel sliding closed. a few heartbeats later, he climbs into bed beside you. his arms wrap around your middle again. same as always.
but his grip? it's just a little tighter now.
⛧⃝
the day feels too normal.
jungwon makes you breakfast again—eggs over rice, scallions chopped thin, pickled radish on the side just how you like it. you catch him watching you between bites, but when you look up, he only smiles. "you're quiet today," he says. "so are you."
he frowns at your retort, "but you're the one i worry about." you don't answer but your throat feels thick, tight with the weight of what you know. that notebook, those pages and the truth of what's inside him—what's maybe controlling him, even if he thinks it's love.
he cups your cheek gently and brushes your lower lip with his thumb. "you've been sleeping better, right?" you nod, because that's what he wants. his smile softens, "good. you deserve to rest." he clears the table, washes the dishes without a word. there's something so human about it—the way his shoulders hunch, the way his sleeves get wet. he even hums a little, under his breath, some tune you don't recognize.
and for a second, you forget. for a second, you almost let yourself believe this is what it looks like. normal. safe.
it's hours later when he comes to you. you're curled on the futon, eyes half-lidded from the heat, body loose with stillness. jungwon slides down beside you wordlessly, head resting on your thigh. his fingers graze the bare skin above your knee. "do you remember," he murmurs, "the first time i saw you?" you swallow, "yeah."
"you smiled at me," he looks up at you now, chin resting on your leg, gaze dark. "you were so soft. so kind. even when everyone else was screaming." he traces a slow line down your calf. not threatening, not yet. "i thought maybe you were sent to save me." you laugh, but it's empty, "i'm not the saving type."
"no," he whispers. "you're not." he shifts up slowly—arms bracing on either side of you, eyes searching your face. he looks so gentle, too gentle. "but you're mine." his kiss is quiet at first—feather-light, pressing to your cheek, the corner of your mouth, your throat. then deeper, hungrier.  his hands are slow, reverent, brushing beneath your shirt like he's asking even though you both know he won't stop if you say no.
"let me take care of you tonight," he breathes. "just... let me do this." you don't say yes but you don't say no. you don't stop him when he pushes your thighs apart. don't flinch when he kisses down your stomach, mouthing against the soft skin just above your core like it's holy. like it's his last prayer. "i just want to taste you again," he whispers. "just this. nothing else."
his hands tug down your pajamas, his eyes glassy as he admires your soft skin and the panties the he had bought you. his fingers grace the lacey fabric softly making you shiver, seeing your reaction—he smirks. he pulls down the thin fabric next, his pupils dilating before he's jutting his tongue out to wet his lips.
he's careful, at first. tongue slow, touch restrained. one hand anchored against your inner thigh, the other curled tight in the blanket as if he's holding himself back from something darker. your breath catches and your hips twitch.
his tongue glides down your slit, gathering your slick before swirling it around your clit. you shudder when you feel him blow softly against your sensitive bud, your stomach tightening at a dangerous rate.  "there you go," he murmurs, mouth warm against you. "that's it. that's my good girl."
he doesn't ask for anything in return, but you feel it—how close he is to needing more. how the restraint is slipping, how his fingers keep flexing, like he's debating whether to grab your wrists. to pin you open. to make you beg.
you cum. but he keeps going like he wants to pull another one out of you with devotion alone. and when he finally stops—lips slick and eyes glassy, he kisses the inside of your thigh, then crawls back up to hold you close. "you belong here," he whispers against your hair. "with me." you say nothing, you don't move.
your skin still tingles. but inside your mind, all you can hear is the notebook's warning: "it devours. it possesses. it feasts on obsession—especially the kind that pretends to be love."
he's softer the next morning, arms wrapped around your waist, cheek pressed between your shoulder blades, breathing steady. you pretend to be asleep. you've gotten good at that. he shifts slightly, you feel the faintest press of his lips against your back. "you were so good for me last night," he whispers, barely audible. "you let me love you."
and just like that, your stomach knots. you sit with it for hours. the notebook's words echo over and over, carved into your thoughts like scripture. "the chainsaw doesn't just destroy devils. it becomes what it's fed."
"it hungers for love. for ownership. for submission."
"feed it the illusion. let it believe you belong to it. and when it's full... strike."
your hands shake as you pour the tea, he kisses your temple and doesn't notice.
it starts that night. you wait until he's tucked into you again, his body curled around yours like armor. "jungwon," you say quietly, he freezes—just for a second. he always does when you speak first, "hm?"
"you want me, right?" and his breath stutters. "don't ask stupid questions," he says. "you know i do." you pause, "then show me."
he's still, "you're not just saying that?" he asks carefully, eyes locked onto yours. "you're not trying to trick me?" you smile—soft, sweet, practiced. "i want to be yours." and that's all it takes.
his hands tremble at first. not with nerves but with restraint. he touches you like he's still afraid you'll disappear if he pushes too fast. but you open for him willingly, wrap your arms around his neck. kiss him with something close to hunger.
he swears softly, "you're finally mine," he murmurs, voice wrecked. "you're finally letting me—" you pull him in and silence him with your lips. his pants are half-off before he even realizes you've taken control of the pace—the kiss deepening, your legs parting, hips rising to meet him.
"slow," you whisper. "go slow." one hand wraps around your throat while the other reaches down to push down his boxers, his girth slapping his stomach—painfully hard.
you let him help you shimmy of your pants and panties in one go, his fingers tracing over you but you stop him. "no, i want it in me. please wonnie."
jungwon swore he could cum right there in that moment, he pushes in like he's savoring every inch—breath ragged, one hand cradling your face, the other gripping your waist like he'll break you if he holds any tighter. "fuck," he whispers. "you feel like... you were made for me."
you make a soft noise in response—the kind that makes him kiss your throat, your shoulder, your chest. desperate little worships between thrusts. his rhythm never falters. deep, deliberate. devotional. you moan for him, just enough. his eyes flutter shut and he doesn't realize that you're watching him.
doesn't realize that you're memorizing every weak spot. every place his mind drifts too far into the illusion—where he forgets to guard himself. where his heart starts to override his instincts. he doesn't realize this is the first time you've truly felt powerful since he pulled you into his world.
and it's not power in the way he wants it, it's yours.
jungwon's moaning into your ear, his thrusts getting impossibly deeper as he speaks gibberish. "s-so close, let me cum inside," he whines. you feel your throat tighten, you want to say no. "okay—okay. cum inside me, wonnie. m'wanna feel you." you could feel jungwon twitch at your words, "m'gonna fill you up. g-gonna make you swell with my kids," he hisses softly before he falls apart.
you shudder when he finishes, you feel full. his cum thick and warm, coating your insides perfectly. after, he wraps you in his arms like you're something sacred. he breathes against your temple, murmuring things you don't care to hold onto.
his cock is still soft inside you, his heartbeat is loud and his mind is quiet. for once, you stare at the ceiling and you begin to plan.
he hums while brushing your hair, it's barely morning. the sun filters through the curtains in narrow strips of gold, and you're seated in his lap, head tipped forward while he runs a comb through your hair like it's the most sacred task in the world.
"you were so good last night," he says. "i've never felt that close to anyone before." you don't respond, you don't need to. he's content to speak for both of you now. "i know it's different for you. i know you're still... adjusting. but i can feel it. i know you're starting to love me back."
you turn your head slightly, just enough for your cheek to brush against his shoulder. "i'm trying," you whisper, he kisses the top of your head. you've learned how to say what he wants to hear. when to touch him, when to flinch. everything is calculated now, the act has become second nature.
you start keeping track of his habits, what time he sleeps deepest. where he leaves his coat. how long his showers last. how sharp his chainsaw arm looks after he cleans it. you cook for him, you sit close. you let him take you apart with his mouth at night, even when you don't want to. especially when you don't want to. because the closer he thinks you are to surrender, the more careless he becomes.
"i love making you feel good," he mumbles one night, face buried between your legs. "i don't need anything else. i could stay here forever." and you stroke his hair like you believe him.
the notebook is tucked beneath your mattress, wrapped in one of his old shirts. hidden, but close. you flip through its pages when you're alone, studying the margins where someone—maybe someone like you—had scrawled desperate notes in tiny handwriting.
"don't resist too obviously. it confuses it."
"the chainsaw doesn't want a pet. it wants a partner. fake that."
"the moment it believes it's loved, it softens. that's when it can be hurt."
"but if you get it wrong—if it knows you're lying, it will never stop."
you read the last one twice, and then again.
he starts asking questions after a few days, "why were you up last night?" you blink at him over your tea, "i wasn't." he looks at you with an unreadable expression, "you were. i heard you in the kitchen." you feign confusion, "i thought i heard something outside. it was nothing."
he watches you for a moment too long, his hand finds yours, "you'd tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?" you squeeze back, "of course."
that night, you put the notebook back exactly where he left it. he checks in the morning and you hear the rustle of paper. the silence that follows, then his footsteps. "you moved it." you look up from the couch, play dumb. "what?"
"the book. it wasn't where i left it," your pulse quickens—but you don't let it show. "i bumped into the shelf while cleaning. maybe it fell." he doesn't speak, you can feel his eyes scanning you, hungry and suspicious all at once. then his shoulders relax. "you should be more careful," he murmurs. "some things shouldn't be touched."
you nod, you smile. and you tuck the warning away like another page in your survival manual. you read the book every moment you can. the cursed one—warped at the spine, its pages always warm, like flesh. it calls to you, louder than jungwon's voice, more constant than his touch. it tells you things he never did. things you were never supposed to know. how the devil inside him, the chainsaw—isn't a parasite. it's a pact, a bond sealed in blood and want. and like all devils, it feeds off something.
not just fear. not just violence but obsession, love. and then, you find the rule. to summon the chainsaw devil, to separate it from the host—he must truly believe you love him. your breath catches and you understand. you can't fight him physically, you can't outrun him you can't outsmart him—not forever. but if you can trick the devil, if you can make jungwon believe he's won—you might get one chance. one moment to call it by name, to break the bond, to be free.
so you act.
you hold his hand when he offers it, you smile when he kisses you. you let him touch. let him whisper things in your ear like "you're the only thing keeping me sane." you play the part. when he brings you breakfast in bed—eggs shaped like hearts, toast carved with your initials —you giggle. when he curls around you in the middle of the night, you kiss his forehead and whisper i love you into his hair. he believes it, he has to.
every time you press your lips to his skin, you taste iron. the chainsaw inside him purrs, satisfied.
it takes weeks, weeks of laying beside him while bile rises in your throat. weeks of burying the nightmares, of faking softness, of giving him everything he wants just short of your soul. he gets softer, relaxed and his guard slips. his need to control you shifts into smugness—the way he watches you fold laundry like a housewife, the way he smirks when you crawl into his lap with big, empty eyes.
he thinks he's won and that's when you start preparing. because you've done your part. and soon—the devil will do his. you don't sleep anymore, not really. even when your body gives in—even when the sheets are warm and jungwon's arms are around you, breath steady against your neck, you never sink. you float, tethered to the ceiling, watching yourself from above. waiting.
waiting for him to crack, waiting for yourself to. so when he leaves for supplies, humming under his breath, you don't hesitate. you kneel in the center of the living room, floorboards creaking under your weight, and whisper the name that's been echoing in the back of your mind ever since that night.
"chainsaw man."
the lights flicker, then die. the room goes dark. too dark. a thick, suffocating black that swallows everything whole. and then it answers, it looks like jungwon at first. same face, same build, same sweet voice.
"you called me?" but the eyes are wrong, too wide, too still. no breath fogs the air around its mouth. its smile is too sharp—the kind that feels carved in. you swallow, "you're not him."
"i'm not. but i wear him well, don't i?" its voice warps mid-sentence, glitching, like too many mouths are speaking at once. it moves closer. "you've seen pieces of me. the things that wake you up at night. the parts of him that don't feel quite human." you stand your ground, "what are you?"it grins, "obsession. hunger. need. he made a deal and i made him whole."
"and the cost?" your voice trembles. "you," the word lands like a slap. "he didn't know it then," the devil adds, tilting its head. "but the moment he wanted you more than he wanted freedom, i had him." you feel sick, but you force the question out. "what if i give myself up instead?" silence, then the smile fades. "you're offering yourself... in his place?" you nod once, "take back what's yours. let him go. i'll give you everything."
the devil steps forward—slow, graceful. almost reverent. "tempting," it murmurs. "but he won't let go. not now. not ever." your head spins, "i'll convince him."
"you're welcome to try."
and then the door slams open, "what the fuck are you doing?" you turn, he's in the doorway, fists clenched, chest rising fast. his bag drops to the floor. his eyes are wide, and then they change. iris to ember, white to blood. and his arm—his arm rips open, bones cracking, metal grinding as the blade splits through his flesh, unfurling like a jagged bloom.
"you were going to give yourself to it?" the chainsaw roars to life and the floor trembles beneath your feet. "after everything? after me? after what we've shared?" you step backc "jungwon—" he cuts you off immediately, like his name out of your mouth burned him. "don't call me that," he snaps. "don't fucking pretend you still get to say my name."
the devil, still behind you—watches silently. amused. "i pitied you," you whisper. "i tried to love you. i tried to believe this was something real. but you turned it into a cage." he freezes and for the first time, he doesn't speak. his face crumbles, eyes too bright. blood trickling down his arm where the chainsaw roots into his shoulder, still whirring like it's hungry.
"you never loved me," he says, not a question—not even angry. just broken, "you lied." and the bond—the one you never agreed to, the one that kept your mouth shut and your hands folded, splinters. the devil behind you exhales and the air sharpens.
jungwon takes a step forward, you don't run. the chainsaw devil lingers in the room like a sickness—sprawled in the corner, grinning wide, eyes glowing red as it watches everything unfold like a stage play made just for him. jungwon is on his knees in front of you. blood smeared across his arms, jaw trembling, mouth moving faster than his mind can keep up.
"you love me," he whispers. "you do. you just... you forgot for a second. but it's okay, i can remind you—i can make you feel it again." you don't answer, you can't. the silence stretches and the devil laughs from the corner. a low, guttural sound like rusted machinery trying to breathe.
"oh, poor little dog," it drawls. "still begging." jungwon's head jerks toward it—chainsaw arm twitching, sparking but then he turns back to you, softer again. desperate. "don't listen to it," he pleads. "you know it's lying. you know we're real. all those nights, everything we shared... that was real, right?"
you swallow, your lips part but nothing comes out. and in that moment, he knows. his eyes darken, jaw clenching so hard you hear his teeth grind. he stands slowly, the weight of the truth sinking into his bones. "you used me," he says, voice flat. then again, louder—uglier. "you fucking used me." behind him, the chainsaw devil laughs louder, almost delighted.
"she played you like a goddamn fiddle," it says. "and you sang." the floor cracks beneath jungwon's feet as the air shifts. the chainsaw on his arm roars to life, screaming into the walls, sparks flying like a storm. his other hand slams into the wall beside your head, pinning you there —his face inches from yours, twisted in betrayal.
"was any of it real?" he growls. "did you even feel anything when i touched you? when i begged for you?" his voice breaks, but his grip doesn't and the devil leans forward, licking its lips. "this is my favorite part," it murmurs.
"you made me think we were in love," jungwon spits. "you made me believe it. you—" he drags the saw across the floor, leaving a deep gash in the wood. "you ruined everything." you flinch, breath shaking. your back hits the wall harder as he cages you in with his body. the heat of the saw burns close to your thigh, but he doesn't press it —not yet.
"say you love me," he snaps. "say it now. fix this. fix me." you stare at him and maybe he sees something in your eyes—not fear, not even hatred. just... exhaustion. you don't answer, you won't lie, not anymore.
he screams. loud, guttural, animal. the chainsaw slams into the doorframe beside you, sending chunks of it flying. and the devil? the devil just grins, red eyes gleaming like fire. "go on," it says. "show her what you really are." jungwon's breath shakes. his forehead presses against yours, and for a second, he's quiet again.
"we were supposed to be forever," he whispers. you don't move. you can't. and somewhere deep inside him, that final thread—the one holding him together, finally snaps. the chainsaw devil laughs like it's been waiting for this. it echoes through the room like a sickness, bouncing off the shattered windows, crawling up your spine like cold hands. smoke coils from the broken floorboards. blood seeps into the cracks. and in front of you, jungwon is no longer jungwon.
his chest rises and falls in jagged rhythm, chainsaw arm sputtering to life with a roar that shakes the walls. where his eyes used to hold tears, they now burn red-hot—not just glowing, but lit, like a furnace. his skin splits in places, veins pulsing black with whatever poison the devil's poured into him.
you don't see the boy who brought you breakfast in silence. you don't see the boy who begged for your love with a whisper. you see the devil's chosen vessel, "you lied to me," he snarls, voice cracking open. it's his voice, and something deeper. layered. possessed. "you fucking lied."
he steps forward and the air drops ten degrees. his saw-drenched arm whines as it revs again, teeth spinning like a threat, bright with heat. the tip grazes the ground, carving a line as he walks, sparks flying at your feet. behind him, the devil lounges lazily against the crumbling wall, watching like a cat with a caught bird. "ah," it says, almost purring, "my little host finally wakes up."
"shut up," jungwon growls without turning. he's trembling—not from weakness, but barely-contained rage. grief. betrayal. "i gave you everything," he says, jaw clenched so tight you hear it crack. "i gave you every part of me. i made you mine. i—" his voice breaks and his hand slams into the wall beside your head again, harder this time. the plaster cracks.
you flinch but you don't cry, you don't beg. you just stare and that's what finally does it. something shifts behind his eyes—something that unravels the last thread holding him together.
he screams, the chainsaw arm explodes to full power, carving the wall beside your head in half. the devil laughs, delighted, as jungwon's body convulses, more rage than reason. his other hand finds your throat but he doesn't squeeze, not yet. just holds, like he's trying to feel if your pulse still stutters for him.
"say it," he chokes. "say you love me. say it now and i'll stop. i'll put it away. i'll let you go." your lips part but nothing comes out and that's when he really loses it. he screams, not your name. not even words anymore—just raw, furious noise, ripping out of him like a chain being yanked from a throat.
the chainsaw arm slams into the wall beside your head, this time carving clean through it. drywall bursts apart, smoke thick in the air, and the heat of the blade is close enough to burn. his body shakes with rage, teeth bared, eyes wet and bloodshot—but they never leave yours. like even now, even after everything, you're the only thing anchoring him to this plane.
"was it all fake?" he pants, voice shredded. "every kiss, every look—? you let me touch you. you let me love you." you try to speak, to move but he's too close. his hand presses to your chest, flat and rough, right above your heart—feeling it beat. too fast. too scared.
"you wanted me," he whispers. "i know you did. your body never lied." you flinch and the devil cackles, still hunched in the corner like a grotesque shadow. "love me," jungwon snarls. "love me, or i swear to god—" his voice breaks and something in his posture crumbles. his body jerks once, and the chainsaw sputters, stalling—teeth clicking uselessly mid-air like a dying thing.
you watch it, watch him. you don't say anything, not because you're scared. but because you're done, done with the fear, done pretending. and in that silence, the refusal—he knows. his knees buckle slightly, just a moment. like the weight of your indifference is heavier than any chainsaw could be. his hand drops from your chest, not out of mercy—out of loss. you see it in his face, that he knows he's already lost you.
"...i would've killed for you," he says, so quiet it's almost nothing. "i did." the devil stirs, its head tilts, grin sharpening. "don't be shy now," it purrs, eyes glowing hotter. "she's right there. and you've already ruined her, haven't you?" jungwon turns to it, slowly. his eyes hollow. you barely catch the movement before it happens—a shudder that starts in his spine, rippling outward like static and the chainsaw flares back to life, screaming.
he's not even looking at you anymore, just the devil. "get out," he says, voice shaking and the devil blinks, confused. "...what?" jungwon's arm snaps—blade pointed directly at it, trembling, firelight dancing off blood-soaked teeth. "get out of me." the devil snarls. "you ungrateful little—" but it doesn't finish. because you say it again—quiet, deliberate: "jungwon."
his head jerks, your voice cuts cleaner than the chainsaw ever could and something shifts. the light in his eyes flickers, behind him, the devil stares at you. like it knows, like it feels the bond fracturing. the room begins to shake, you don't stop. "you're not it," you whisper. "you're you. come back." for a second, one impossible second—the chainsaw dies down again. but this time, the devil screams. a sound so loud it cracks the walls.
and suddenly, jungwon is shaking—teeth clenched, hand twisted in his own hair, the saw jerking erratically as the devil fights to keep hold. his body writhes in place, caught between two fires. and you know, this is it. either he wins, or the devil does. your voice cracks as you say it again, stepping forward even though your knees nearly give.
"jungwon. come back to me."
he looks at you—and this time, he chooses. his eyes meet yours. for once, there's no bloodlust behind them. no rage. no hunger. just jungwon and for a moment—he's back. his mouth parts like he wants to say something but the chainsaw devil inside him roars instead. the scream tears through his throat, shaking the whole room. he drops to his knees like he's being pulled down by something inside him, clawing at his chest, his arm, like he's trying to rip it out. sparks spit from the chainsaw—it jerks wildly, carving into the floor, the walls, the air.
and behind him, the devil stumbles backward. eyes wide, furious. "don't you dare—" it snarls, smoke curling from its mouth. it tries to surge forward, but it can't. it's tethered to him, chained through him. and you? you're breaking that chain.
you step toward jungwon slowly and kneel beside him. he's still trembling, gasping like his lungs are full of ash, blood dripping from his nose, his mouth, his fingertips—but he looks at you like you're the only thing keeping him here. his hand twitches toward yours, desperate, scared, small. "don't let it take me," he breathes. "please." your throat closes up and you touch his face, gently. his skin is burning hot, too hot. like something inside him is boiling over but he leans into your hand.
and you say the only thing you can, "then let go." he shakes his head—violently, panicked. "i can't— it'll kill me—" "it'll kill everything," you whisper. "me. you. what's left of you. is that what you want?" his breath catches, he looks at you like you've stabbed him and maybe you have. his lips part. "...no." and then with a shudder that cracks the floor beneath him—he lets go.
his body seizes once, twice, and the chainsaw arm explodes in a burst of steam and fire. the room lights up like a furnace, heat licking the walls, and the scream the devil lets out isn't human. it's a beast dying slowly, violently—its voice splitting like a dozen rusted engines tearing apart at once.
"no—" it wails. "you need me—!" jungwon doesn't answer he just closes his eyes and breathes. behind him, the chainsaw devil cracks, splits down the middle like a mirror hit with a hammer. its body tears itself open from the inside, light and ash spilling out like a dying sun. and in the silence that follows—it's gone. you watch silently, your body numb.
the room goes still and jungwon slumps forward into your arms. burned. broken. bleeding. but human. you hold him for a long time, long enough for his breath to slow. his eyes flutter open just once and he whispers your name like he's saying sorry.
you don't speak, you just hold him tighter until he falls asleep.
you leave the next morning, quietly—carefully.
you don't look back, and on your way out as the door shuts behind you—you don't see it: the faint glint in the cracked floorboards. a single, jagged chainsaw tooth, left behind.
still warm, still waiting.
⛧⃝
you find him months later. no one talks about what happened, the city forgets quickly—blood fades, bodies rot, buildings fall and no one remembers the screams.
but you do, you always will.
he's not dead, you knew he wouldn't be. he's somewhere out past the edge of the city—where the devils don't go, where the silence hums louder than anything else. an old shack with no doors, just shadows. no lights, just him.
you step inside, heart in your throat. he's waiting, sitting on the floor like he never left it. legs pulled up, arms resting loosely over his knees. his head tilts when he sees you, "you came back," he murmurs. not a question, not surprised—but like he always knew.
you don't answer, he looks the same but dimmer. like the light was cut off from inside with only traces of red burn behind his eyes now, smoldering like coals. quiet. patient. lethal.
"i thought you hated me," he says. "i did," you say back, your eyes searching his.  "still do?" you hesitate, and that's enough. he smiles, slow and sharp. "it's okay," he says softly. "you don't have to lie. you were always good at pretending." you take a step back but he doesn't move. just watches you—like a predator that already knows you're too tired to run.
"did you really think it'd be over?" he asks, head tilting again. "that killing the devil would kill me too?" his voice is calm, but the air vibrates around it. something unnatural, something wrong.
"you played the game," he says, eyes narrowing. "but you forgot the rule." your breath catches and his grin grows wider. "you don't kill a devil with love," he leans forward. "you feed it."
your fingers twitch, the old instinct to run kicking in too late. he stands—slow, deliberate and walks until he's close, too close.
and then he whispers, right into your ear: "you're never escaping chainsaw man's clutches."
your blood runs cold, behind him, in the shadows, you swear you see something twitch. teeth. blades. smoke curling like fingers reaching out again.
and still, he smiles—because he knows. because he's still in there.
because you let him in—and now he's never letting go.
— enjoy this fic? check out my other ones right here!
512 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 23 days ago
Note
thx for existing🙏🏻🙏🏻
mwah
3 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 23 days ago
Note
my bae... you just never disappoint GIRL TF WAS THAT!!!!! GOD IM OBSESSED
IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT!!!
3 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 23 days ago
Note
Hi my love!! How are you doing?? LYSM 🩷
Tumblr media
Cute Jay for you LOL 🩷🫶🏻
hiii!!! i’m doing good how have u been :) LYT
Tumblr media
have roblox jake 😋
7 notes · View notes
jaysbaefie · 23 days ago
Text
saw you first | yjw
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: in which you try to run, jungwon lets you—just to remind you that you’ll always belong to him.
genre: chainsaw man au
pairing: chainsaw man!jungwon x barista!reader
warnings: yandre!jungwon, some unwarranted touching, toxic!jungwon, so incredibly delusional!jungwon, forced proximity, forced relationship, reader is basically held hostage, dub/non con, oral (f.rec), unprotected p in v, breeding kink, jungwon wants to baby trap reader, chocking, manhandling…i think that’s it…
wc: 23.3k+
a/n: i am once again proving that i can write plot! this was originally supposed to be a mere 12k words… i got a bit carried away with plot and i knew that if i left it as is then people would b asking for a part 2 so i just decided to bless yall w a fat one. anyways..hope yall enjoy! notes, reblogs and comments r always appreciated! enjoy :]
taglist: @won1yoiz @fancypeacepersona @betda @starry-eyed-bimbo @theothernads @wonzzziezzzz @yeonmuse @rikifordmiami
@pinkiwinkiminki
⛧⃝
fear has distinct shape.
that's what they say now at least. not metaphorically, not in poetry or horror films—but literally. fear became real the moment it was fed into our minds enough. when the world collapsed under the weight of its own nightmares, that fear grew legs, claws and mouths. and then it started eating people.
devils took over slowly, like mold growing in the walls of an abandoned house. first the animals disappeared, then the kids and then the sunlight.
cities fell, corpses rose and when the governments failed, public safety stepped in. an army of hunters built on contracts, blood, and desperation took over and now every city is its own kind of hell.
and you?
you make cappuccinos in seoul sector 3 where the devils are meaner, the streets rot faster, and no one comes to help when someone cries out into the night.
you took the job at 'sublime café' because it was small, unassuming, and just far enough off the grid to keep trouble at bay—or so you thought. in your 7 months working here, you hadn't ran into any devils. so you allowed yourself to relax, to let your guard down—until you remembered why it was up in the first place.
a dented metal shutter protected the windows at night, a reinforced steel door led to the back alley. the owner stocked a baseball bat under the register and holy water near the tea bags.
you know, just in case.
it was mostly quiet, with not many lurking on this side of the city. your regulars were all a little dead behind the eyes, the kind of people who'd seen someone's head pop like a balloon and still come in for an iced americano.
you got used to it. you stopped flinching when the ground trembled or when blood ran between the pavement cracks. you told yourself you weren't important enough to be hunted, no one wanted you enough to lurk around in these areas.
until the night he showed up.
it was late, your shift was almost over. the rain had thinned to mist, clinging to the windows and softening the streetlights outside. you were behind the counter, counting cash and humming to yourself, when the sky split open with a crack like thunder—but deeper, wetter.
you stilled, then came the scream. not human—guttural. a sound that clawed at your spine and made your heart drop straight into your gut.
you moved before you could think, hands fumbling for the emergency switch behind the register. the lights dimmed to red and the steel shutters started to roll down over the windows, screeching like rusted bones.
too late.
the front wall exploded inward. shards of glass flew like it was raining knives and the floor cracked beneath the weight of something enormous slamming into the café. limbs twitching, body slithering like oil-slick muscle. the scent hit you next: rot and metal. spoiled blood, something not meant to be inhaled.
it loomed in the wreckage, a pulsing, unnatural shape that twitched and writhed in the corner of your eye. your brain struggled to give it form, it shifted with every blink. too many legs, too many teeth and an eye—one massive, unblinking orb that locked onto you like a spotlight.
"little human," it gurgled, voice like wet stone dragging across your skin. "what flavor does your fear come in?"
you couldn't move.
your breath caught in your throat and your legs were numb. your entire body was frozen—as if the fear had seeped straight into your bones and stiffened your body.  the devil laughed, the vibrations of his heinous voice causing the walls to shiver.
and then a scream, not yours, echoed the small café. something or, someone, sliced through the devil's body like a buzzsaw through meat. a red blur exploded through the wall behind it, tearing through flesh, bone and sinew. a scream of chains and fury, loud enough to rattle your teeth. blood sprayed the walls like a firehose. chunks of flesh splattered across the freshly cleaned espresso machine and counters.
you stumbled back, heart slamming against your ribs, vision full of red. he stood there—in the middle of the carnage.
a boy.
your age, maybe younger. head bowed, shoulders trembling with steam rising from his back like smoke from a freshly doused fire. a chainsaw jutted from his arms, coated in gore.
his chest rose and fell like he had just run a marathon. he was drenched in blood, chunks of devil flesh clung to his clothes and his blonde locks. his hands twitched at his sides like he didn't know what to do with them. the chainsaws that had morphed out of his his skin stopped buzzing now that there was nothing left to kill.
the devil was gone, eviscerated. there was nothing left but a pulp of its remnants and silence.
he looked up and for a moment, the café was dead quiet—no chainsaws, no screams, just the tick... tick... tick of blood dripping onto tile.
his eyes met yours and something in his face broke. his body relaxed, the saws slid back into his skin with a thick, wet noise, like knives sinking into flesh. he took one step forward, then another—slow, cautious, like he was afraid of startling you.
his face...was beautiful. soft jaw, lips chapped and bitten raw and a scar cut through his brow. but his eyes, his eyes were what scared you most. they looked at you like you were holy.
"you okay?" he asked, his voice soft and silky. it almost made you laugh at the stark contrast of his actions and his now demeanour.  you nodded before your mouth could catch up. "y—yeah." your voice cracked, your shirt was soaked in someone else's blood. your hands were shaking, you were not okay—but somehow, telling him that didn't feel like an option.
he stared at you, then he smiled. soft, warm, terrifying. "you smiled at me," he whispered, his gaze still stuck to you like glue.  your brows knit in confusion, "what?"
"just now. you... smiled. after i saved you."
you opened your mouth to correct him—you hadn't smiled, had you? maybe it was a nervous twitch. a reflex. maybe it was just shock—"no one's ever done that before," he said, like he was telling you a secret."not even the people i saved. they always scream. run. cry." his voice was getting quieter, more distant. like he was somewhere else and no longer present with you.
"but you looked at me like i'm—" he cut himself off. his head tilted slightly to the side, blood dripped from his chin. he was still staring at you, but now his gaze felt thicker, heavier. like it was sinking into your skin and wrapping around your lungs.
"what's your name?" you didn't answer. he took another step forward and you scrambled back—your back hitting the wall.
"i'm jungwon," he said simply. "i'll see you again." your eyes twitched at his confidence and you didn't know if you should take his words as a promise or a threat.
and just like that—he was gone.
no footsteps, no exit. just a blur of motion and silence, and then the night swallowed him whole. you stood there for a long time, long enough for the adrenaline to crash. long enough to cry, long enough to wonder if anyone would believe you when you told them that chainsaw man had saved your life—and smiled like he wanted to keep it.
keep you.
⛧⃝
you didn't tell anyone. except your boss, not the police, and not the shriveled old priest who came by every week to toss holy water on the café floor and mutter things in dead languages.
how do you explain that chainsaw man, the chainsaw man, public safety's blood-slick myth, devil hunter of devil hunters—saved your life, then whispered your name like he wanted to wear it?
you couldn't. so you didn't. you cleaned the blood off the tiles. replaced the windows, sanitized the counters and scrubbed devil guts out of the espresso machine. and then tried to convince yourself it was over, that you'd go back to normal.
but a week passed, and you started noticing things. small things, at first. on day 3, the café door rattled after closing, no one was there but you could feel an almost familiar presence. on day 4, your apartment window was unlocked when you got home—and you never forget to lock it. on day 5, someone left something on your doorstep. a devil's tooth, still wet and wrapped in a receipt from 'sublimez.' your name circled in red ink with a small heart right next to it.
you stopped sleeping after that, you told yourself it wasn't him. couldn't be. jungwon was a devil hunter, he saved people. he didn't... follow them? he didn't stalk them through alleys and leave parts of what he killed as gifts.
but part of you knew that it was him.  you remembered the look in his eyes and the way he said your name. like he wanted to keep it in his mouth forever.
you saw him again on the 7th night. it was after closing and the streets were nearly empty. mist clung to the ground like spilled breath. you'd taken the long way home—just in case. your feet ached and your breath fogged the air. you didn't notice him at first. but when you passed the alley across from the café—you felt it. a prickle up your spine, like being stared at for too long.
you turned around, your body shaking in anticipation and your legs positioning in fight or flight mood. although you seriously doubt you'd be able to outrun him, you'd take your chances. he was standing in the dark, his blonde hair peaking at you—taunting you.
jungwon.
half-hidden behind a wall of shadow and brick, but you could see his eyes. bright, sharp and tracking you. he didn't move, but you did. fast.
you didn't run, not yet, but your heart picked up with your pace hitching as you turned back toward the main street and kept walking. hands in your coat pockets, head down. don't look, don't run, don't let him know you're afraid.
"you're out late," his voice came from right behind you. you spun around in shock only to come face to face with him, he was close, too close. no chainsaws this time, no blood. just jungwon, in a torn hoodie and scuffed boots, looking at you like you were still glowing in his memory. you stepped back and he followed closely.
"you haven't been smiling lately," he said, voice soft. curious. "did something happen?" your throat closed, he had been following you. "jungwon," you said, stiff but politely. "what... are you doing here?" his head tilted and his lips curled into something like a smile but it was too calm—too fond.
"i wanted to see you," he said it like it was obvious. like it was inevitable."you smiled at me, remember?" he begins, watching your face carefully. "and i haven't stopped thinking about it." you didn't answer but your fingers tightened in your coat pockets. you could feel your phone, but you knew you wouldn't be able to move fast enough. not with him this close.
"people don't smile at me," he went on, voice gentler now. like he was trying to soothe you, like he knew what was going on in your head. "they scream. they call me a monster. they run." his gaze softens, his eyes glistening slightly as he stares down at you. "but you—" he takes a step closer. "—you looked at me like i was real." he stepped closer again, you hit the wall behind you. a dead-end.
he didn't touch you he just leaned in, his breath brushing your cheek, voice so low it trembled against your skin. "so i wanted to see what your fear looks like, too."
your breath caught in your throat. "don't worry," he murmured. "i won't hurt you." your still on edge but for some reason his words put you to ease, your body relaxing for a split second before seizing up again. "not unless you run."
his voice didn't rise, his body didn't shift. he didn't growl or flash those chainsaw blades. but somehow, it was worse this way. the calm, the softness. like he was already imagining peeling you open.
"jungwon," you whispered. "please don't—" "i'm not gonna hurt you," he repeated. "i just... want to be close." his fingers brushed your wrist, you flinched. he didn't pull away—if anything, he grew bolder. his touch moved up slowly, curling around your forearm. gentle, but firm—measured. like he was memorizing the shape of you. learning where your bones sat. how your pulse felt under his thumb.
you tried to step aside but his body blocked yours. he didn't shove—just leaned in, crowding you against the wall. his hand rose up, 2 fingers ghosted your cheek causing you to stiffen.  his eyes studied your face like it was a scene of violence he wanted to relive.
"you're shaking," he murmured. "i wonder..." his gaze darkened slightly, his thumb brushing your bottom lip—slow, like a question. "is that because you're scared of me... or because you remembered me?" your stomach turned, you pressed yourself harder against the brick, trying to shrink into nothing.
"you haven't smiled again," he murmured. "why?" he looked visibly upset, you failed to understand why it mattered as much as it did to him. "i didn't mean to smile," you said, voice brittle. "it was... i don't know. adrenaline. shock."
he blinked, then his smile fell. he looked hurt, "so it wasn't real?" you said nothing. "you didn't mean it?" he pressed, quieter this time. "you didn't really see me that way?" the weight of his body shifted. not threatening , not yet, but you could feel it. the invisible line between mercy and obsession starting to bend.
"i've never had someone look at me like that," he said, voice tight. "not once," he pauses for a moment.  "i dream about it, you know. your face. your eyes," his voice softens, and his body relaxes slightly. "you were scared, but you still looked. like i was something more than a weapon."
his hand was still on your face, still gentle. but there was pressure now—the kind that warned you not to pull away. "so if it wasn't real..." his forehead pressed against yours, you didn't breathe. "should i make it real?"
he didn't kiss you, he just hovered there—close enough to taste the heat of your skin, close enough that you could see the bloodstains still caked under his nails. his breath was soft, steady and patient. but he was waiting, and the look in his eyes showed that he he was willing to wait.
"say it again," he said quietly. "say you didn't mean it. say it to my face this time." you stared at him, you couldn't. you wouldn't. your mouth moved, but nothing came out. and maybe that was your answer.
his hand slid lower—over your jaw, down your neck, his fingertips just barely tracing your collarbone now. the pressure wasn't painful but it wasn't innocent, either.
"i knew it," he breathed, voice trembling with something dark and pleased. "you were meant for me," his eyes flicker down to your lips briefly before they jolt back up. your eyes widen at his words, to afraid to correct his delusions. how you wish you had.
his forehead dropped to your shoulder, and for a second, his whole body relaxes—as if touching you settled something wild in his blood.
he didn't let go, and he never will.
you stayed there for a long time trapped between brick and breath, trying not to move. when he finally pulled back, the air felt heavier without him—but not safer. "i'll walk you home," he said.
"no," you responded almost immediately. he tilted his head, blinked, then smiled again. this time much softer, more patient. "okay," he said. "maybe tomorrow." he didn't threaten you. didn't chase. didn't even touch you again. he just turned and walked back into the shadows like he hadn't just carved himself under your skin and stitched you in place.
⛧⃝
you wake up to the sun shining through your iron clad windows and the smell of coffee. not burnt and not cheap. something warm, deep—the kind you only get when someone really knows how to make it.
it was the aroma that hit you when you walked into work, however, you could never replicate that smell at home without the help of expensive machines and high quality grounds.
but you live alone, you sit up too fast. your head spins as you look around your room in suspicion. the room is still, the curtains are open and sunlight glows through the dirty glass. your room looks the same as when you fell asleep last night. everything looks normal, untouched.
except the door to your bedroom is open and you're sure you closed it last night. your ear perk up when you hear something unfamiliar, someone's humming. your throat goes dry, you push the blankets back slowly. your hand already reaching for your phone on the nightstand, but it's not there—the charger's empty.
your heartbeat kicks up. you step into the hallway like you're walking into a war zone, barefoot and barely breathing. the humming grows louder, it's familiar. sweet. soft. wrong. you turn the corner, and he's there.
jungwon. chainsaw man. him.
he's standing by your kitchen counter, sleeves rolled to his elbows, one hand holding a steaming mug while the other scrolls casually through your phone like it's his.
"you slept late," he says without turning. "your alarm went off three times." you don't speak, you can't. he finally looks over his shoulder. his smile is soft—too soft. for someone who had essentially broken into your home and was now making himself comfortable, he looked harmless. "i made coffee," he says, his eyes darting to the second mug placed on the counter.
your mouth moves before your fear can catch up, "how did you get in?" he blinks, slow—like the question doesn't make sense. "you were tired. you left the window open." you didn't, in fact, even if you did he wouldn't be able to get inside. you took the extra precaution to get metal bars installed.
"don't worry," he adds quickly. "i locked it behind me." he places your phone on the counter, "you should update your passcode." your stomach flips, "jungwon," you say and this time your voice shakes. "you need to leave."
he tilts his head like a confused dog. like a child being scolded for something he doesn't understand. "why would i leave?" he asks innocently, his bottom lip jutting out before he takes a small sip of his own coffee,
"because this is my apartment." his eyes narrow. something in his face twitches. the stillness in him turns sharp, like the surface of a knife just before it cuts. "and?" he scoffs. "you let me in. you smiled at me," he continues, staring at you as if you had grown 2 heads. "you wanted this."
"no," you whisper. "i didn't. you're not supposed to be here." the mug in his hand shatters and the ceramic hits the floor in a wet, violent crash—coffee splashing up your legs. you flinch, he doesn't. "don't say that," his voice is flat now.
quiet and cold. like the warmth got stripped out of him in a second. "you don't get to say that after what you did to me." you look at him baffled, "what did i—"
"you saw me," he snarls. "you looked at me like i was human. like i could be... something else. and now you're pretending it didn't mean anything?" he steps forward. you back up instinctively, but the hallway behind you is too narrow, too short. there's nowhere to run without turning your back to him—and you know better than that.
"i said leave—" "don't," he growls. "don't tell me to leave like i'm some stray." you look at him wide eyed, the once soft spoken man had long disappeared. "you don't get it," he breathes, getting closer. "i've killed for less than that look you gave me. i've torn devils apart for breathing wrong in my direction."
"but you..." he paused. "you smiled." his hand snaps out and you flinch, but he doesn't hit you, not yet at least. his fingers wrap around your wrist, tight. bruising tight. he presses you into the wall, "so don't lie to me now." his face is inches from yours. you can see blood on his collarbone. dried, not yours—not yet.
"you're scared," he whispers, voice softer now—too soft. mocking. "but you're still looking at me." his grip doesn't loosen and his body crowds yours. his other hand comes up, brushing your jaw, then sliding lower, pressing lightly at the base of your throat.
your breath stutters. "you're lying," he says again, almost lovingly. "but your body remembers me." his hand is still at your throat, not squeezing. but the weight of it is a warning. "say it," he murmurs. "say you didn't feel anything. lie to my face again."
your heart is pounding so loud you can barely think. your whole body is tensed—wired for flight, though you know there's nowhere to go. not like this, not with him so close.
"jungwon..." you try. "please. you're scaring me." his expression twitches, he blinks. then slowly, his hand drops. but the pressure in the room doesn't. "scared?" he echoes, voice tight. "of me?" you nod, breath hitching as you look at him with caution.
"good."
he doesn't move for a long moment. just stands there too still, too quiet—like the air before a building collapses. then he turns away and your breath starts to come back. just slightly, like maybe he's leaving. but then you hear it, his chainsaw arm erupts with a wet, mechanical roar. the sound is inhuman and deafening—like bone grinding against steel, metal tearing from muscle.
you scream when jungwon slams it into your kitchen wall. the entire cabinet explodes in splinters. wood and tile crash to the floor in pieces, your dishes shattering like glass bombs. the wall crumbles halfway inward, revealing the hollow space between drywall and insulation.
he doesn't even flinch. "i didn't want to scare you," he says, low. "i wanted to protect you." he rips the blade free and the whine cuts out. blood sprays across his shoulder—not yours. he turns around slowly, breathing hard, skin flecked with debris. his voice is shaking now, like he's losing control, "i killed for you. i came back for you."
"do you know how many devils i could've gutted instead of sitting outside your building every night, just to make sure nothing touched you?" your throat locks at his confession. he steps closer again, no blade this time—just him.
"and you're scared because i came in the window?" his eyes are wild now—not fully devil, but not fully human either. something in between. something ruined.
"you should be grateful."
you try to move, to slide away from him, but he grabs your arm and slams you back into the wall. your head spins. not from the force but from the rage in him, the heat. his face is close again, not tender this time—unhinged.
"you think anyone else would survive seeing what i really am?" he hisses. "you think anyone else could stand in front of me, still breathing, still beautiful, and not end up in pieces?"
"no one else gets this," he breathes, almost reverent. "but you do. i saw it in you. i felt it." his hand trails down your side, slow and heavy—the weight of it not fully threatening, but not right either. not safe, it makes your skin crawl. "you smiled," he whispers. "you gave me something."
he presses his forehead to yours, teeth gritted. "and i'm not letting it go." his voice is trembling now—with fury, with hunger, with something darker. "so run, scream, cry, whatever you need. but you're not getting away."
you can feel it now, not just the obsession. but the need. violent. desperate. terminal.he doesn't see you as a person anymore. you're a purpose—a prize. a promise he's decided belongs to him.
"you're mine," he says finally. "you just don't know it yet."
⛧⃝
you can feel him watching you. all morning, it's like your skin is too tight. like your body knows something you're trying to ignore. you nearly drop 3 orders. keep checking the café windows like a girl being hunted—because you are.
and finally, around noon, you see him. standing across the street. still. expressionless. face half in shadow beneath his hoodie. not moving, not blinking—just staring. you freeze mid-pour, the milk spilling over the lip of the cup.
"hey...you okay?" your manager, seoyun, glances at you, eyebrows knit. she's young, sharp, not someone who misses things.
you swallow hard, "yeah. yeah, i'm—" but you glance back toward the window. jungwon's still there, like he never left last night—like he just waited. you lean closer to seoyun, voice low. "can i tell you something? and you promise not to freak out?" seoyun blinks, "...sure."
"you know that guy who saved me? when the devil attacked the other day?" seoyun nodded carefully, still confused, "the one with the chainsaw arm?" you nod, "his name's jungwon." her brows lift, "okay?"
"he's been following me. i woke up and he was in my apartment." she stiffens immediately, "what the fuck."
"he said i smiled at him. that i made him feel human. now he... he won't stop showing up," you feel sick saying it out loud. like giving it breath will make it worse, make him hear you somehow. "do you want me to go out there?" she offers. "i'll tell him to back off."
"no—!" you grab her arm, panic rising in your throat. "don't go near him. he's not like normal people, seoyun. i don't know what he'd do." you couldn't risk your bosses life, you knew what jungwon was capable of.
she stares at you for a long moment then nods. "i'll walk you home tonight. he tries anything, i'll scream bloody murder." you nod, then continue on with your shift—trying to ignore the blonde boy who followed your every move from outside.
he follows the whole walk. never close enough to touch you but never far enough to feel safe. you don't look at him once, but you feel him—across the street, pacing your steps, his gaze like heat at the base of your spine.
seoyun doesn't say anything. she just walks beside you, phone gripped tight in one hand. at your door, you fumble with your keys. "you gonna be okay?" she whispers, her brows furrowing with concern. "i'll text you," you say. "just... don't talk to him. promise me."
she nods, "lock your windows this time, dumbass." they are..bolted down.
you laugh a little, your eye twitching. but your stomach's still twisting as you watch her walk away. jungwon doesn't follow, he just stands there. across the street, backlit by the streetlamp—not moving.
you close your door, lock it. deadbolt it. pull the curtains tight. you try to breathe but your heartbeat dulls in your chest. the next thing on your mind besides your safety was a steaming hot shower.
the heat fogs up the mirror, the hiss of water drowns out the city. for a minute, you almost feel normal. and then you hear it, the wet sound of metal grinding. flesh splitting. bone tearing. a mechanical rev like a scream from inside the walls.
you freeze. you barely have time to grab a towel when the lights go out. the door to the bathroom creaks, you grab the edge of the sink to stay upright. he's here.
"you really let someone walk you home?" his voice is low, too calm. "you let her touch you. talk to you. stand between us," the door groans open. he's a silhouette in the steam—broad shoulders, soaked hoodie, a jagged red glow from the chainsaw arm humming low by his side. blood drips from the blade onto your floor. your heart drops at the sight, the blood looked fresh.
"you think that's okay?" he steps closer. you step back,"jungwon, don't—" "i told you," he snarls, "you don't lie to me. you don't hide from me." he had a crazed look in his eye, a look you had only seen when he was slicing through the demon when you had initially first met him
"i saw you," he breathes. "i claimed you. and now you're pretending like you're scared? like you didn't give yourself to me that day with just one smile?" he lunges at you. you gasp as he slams you back into the tiled wall, water still running, towel barely clinging to your body. the chainsaw arm doesn't touch you, but it's close—humming by your shoulder, hot and slick with blood.
his other hand grabs your jaw, "you're mine," he growls. "say it." "no—" his eyes flash and the chainsaw kicks up with a roar. you scream when he slams it into the floor beside you. tiles explodes, the blade missing your foot by mere inches.
"say it," he hisses. "or next time, i don't miss." you're shaking. you can feel the blood heat on your skin, the vibrating metal, the weight of his body pinning you in. his eyes are wild, mouth curled into a snarl—not because he wants to hurt you, but because he needs you. needs to own you. and every second you deny him, it eats him alive.
"say it," he breathes, leaning in. "say you're mine and i'll make the rest of the world disappear." you say it, you don't mean it. but you say it, "i'm yours." and jungwon—drenched in blood, blade humming inches from your skin, just stops.
his hand loosens around your jaw. the chainsaw groans once, then shuts down, the sharp teeth sinking back into his skin with a sickening crunch. you watch as the flesh heals over, smooth again like it never happened—like he was normal.
he looks at you, breathing hard. wild. then...he smiles. and it's worse than the blade, because it's soft, gentle. like he thinks this is love,  "i knew you'd come around," he murmurs, brushing a wet strand of hair from your face. "i knew you were just scared."
you don't answer, you can't. your whole body is frozen—not from fear now, but from the realization that you've passed some kind of line. that there's no going back. he leans in and presses a kiss to your forehead. it's warm and your stomach turns. "go dry off," he says. "i'll clean up." you do. not because you trust him—but because you're scared of what he'll do if you don't.
when you come out in an oversized shirt, the mess is gone. the blood on the floor, the shattered tile—gone. like it never happened. jungwon is in your kitchen, his shirt off. back turned, casually eating one of your apples, his chainsaw arm completely gone now, like it was a dream.
"i threw out your coffee," he says, like he lives here. "you drink too much of it. not good for your nerves." your throat tightens, "you need to leave."
he turns around, smiles again, "i just got here." he walks past you, slow and confident, already settled—and drops onto your couch like it belongs to him. "you can take the bed tonight. i'll stay here." you blink owlishly, "you're— staying?"
"of course," he says, like it's obvious. "you said you're mine. that means you're safe now. no devils. no one else. just me." you stare at him as he's making himself at home.
pulling his hoodie off. throwing his boots by your door. opening your fridge like it's his. your skin crawls, but you nod. "okay," you whisper. "just tonight." he watches you, his eyes narrow slightly. then softens again. "you'll come around," he says. "i know you will."
you turn, heart pounding, and walk to your room. you shut the door. lock it, as if that'll do anything. you sit on the edge of your bed and cry silently, hands over your mouth, too afraid to let the sound slip through.
outside, jungwon hums to himself. the floor creaks as he walks back and forth. at some point, you hear him in the hallway. opening the linen closet. the bathroom. checking every room. making sure nothing else lives here but him. he stops at your door, your breath catches.
tap. tap. tap.
his knuckle against the wood. "goodnight," he says softly. "you're mine now. you don't have to be scared anymore."
the next morning, your apartment is quieter than it's ever been—too quiet. you wake up and immediately check your bedroom door. it's unlocked. you're sure you locked it. you step out slowly, heart pounding in your throat—and stop.
your living room is clean, too clean. like it's been rearranged. your favorite blanket is gone, your books are stacked neatly in color order, two of your framed pictures are missing. you find jungwon in your kitchen again. he's making eggs.
"morning," he says, without turning. "your knives were dull. i sharpened them." he slides a plate in front of you and smiles. you sit down slowly, he sits too—across from you. he doesn't eat, just watches you. like it makes him feel full. "where's my blanket?"
"it smelled like someone else," he says simply. "i burned it." you stare at him as blankly as you could, afraid that if you showed to much he'd lash out.  he cocks his head, "you don't need it. you have me."
you open your mouth and then close it. your throat's dry. you try to focus on your plate. you need to get through breakfast, keep him calm.
but then your phone rings, a soft vibration on the table. you reach for it but he grabs your wrist mid-air. gently but firm.
"don't."
you peer down to see the name on the screen, a sigh of relief escaping your parted lips, "it's just seoyun—" "you don't need to talk to her," his voice stays calm and level. but there's something else under it, something dangerous. he looks you in the eyes, "you're not hers. you're mine."
you swallow hard, "jungwon..." he lets go of your wrist. then picks up your phone, stares at it for a second and drops it into your full coffee mug.
it sinks. the screen sparks once and goes black. "i'll get you a new one," he says. "you don't need distractions right now." you stare at the cup, black coffee rising around the ruined screen.
"what if i need to call someone?" your mouth moves before you realize.  he raises an eyebrow, "why would you?" you feel it, the panic building in your chest. the slow horror of how normal he's making this feel.
you stand, too fast, "i'm going to shower." he nods, "leave the door open." you pause, stare at him like he was crazy. which, he was. "what?" "just a crack," he says, smiling. "so i know you're safe."
you don't argue, you go to the bathroom. close the door, but you don't lock it. you don't dare. when you get out, one of your favorite hoodies is missing from the hook. you find it later—folded neatly in jungwon's bag.
the next day, you notice more things gone. a pair of heels you wore once on a date. your perfumes, a small photo of you and your old coworker—who happened to be a guy. that's gone too.
jungwon's in your bed that night, curled up beside you like it's the most normal thing in the world. he's warm, his arm drapes over your stomach like a belt. you're stiff, staring at the ceiling, too afraid to move.
"you're softer when you sleep," he whispers, breath warm against your neck. "like you're not fighting me anymore." you shut your eyes tight and  he pulls you closer. "i know you're scared," he murmurs. "but i'm going to take care of you. even if you hate me for it."
you don't respond and he presses a kiss to your shoulder, "you'll learn to love me. i'll make sure of it."
the next morning, he makes you breakfast again. you find your closet rearranged, the tighter dresses folded at the back and the sweatpants you love? gone.
"you look best in soft things," jungwon says, brushing your hair back. "like someone i want to keep." you ask him to leave, "just for a day. i need space." he smiles calmly, the same smile that caused shivers to run down your spine. "why would you need space from the person who loves you the most?"
you push, you say you want time to think. his expression shifts and for just a second, the smile falls. his jaw tenses and his eyes go cold. but then—he laughs. "okay," he says. "i understand."
"really?" you look at him dumbfounded.  "of course. take all the time you need." he leans in and presses a soft kiss to your temple. "just don't be mad when i come back." you don't breathe until he's gone. you rush to the door, you try the locks—they don't budge. you mentally curse yourself for having bolted down windows at this point.  you check under the sink for your emergency phone—it's gone.
and then you hear it. a low, grinding rev. metal screaming and flesh tearing. you run to the hallway and stop dead. the door to your apartment is now marked. deep, jagged gouges— a chainsaw blade dragged in a heart shape across the wood.
inside the heart? one word, carved clean through.
MINE.
⛧⃝
you wait until he's asleep. his back rises and falls steadily beside you with one arm tossed around your waist, face buried in your neck like you're some stuffed animal he can't let go of.
you hold your breath. slowly, gently, you slide out from under his arm. his fingers twitch, but he doesn't wake. you slip into the hallway and grab your shoes. your heart pounds like it's trying to break out of your chest. you're halfway to the stairwell when you hear it. click.
a soft sound, your bedroom door opening. "baby?" your blood freezes. his voice is low. hoarse from sleep. confused.
BRRRRRRRRRRMMMMMMMMMMM.
the chainsaw roars to life behind you. you run. barefoot. down the stairs, through the lobby— slamming the building door open so hard the hinges scream. you don't stop. you run into the street, across the empty road, into the alley behind the café. panting. crying. shaking.
you hide behind the dumpster with your hands over your mouth. the smell makes you gag, but you don't care. anything to stay hidden. then you hear it, slow footsteps. not running. not chasing.
just coming, "you're faster than i thought."
you squeeze your eyes shut, his voice is closer now. "but you really thought you could run away from me?" the chainsaw hums. so much louder out here, so much louder when it's not a dream. "i forgave a lot, you know," his tone is soft. eerily calm. "you were mean to me. ignored me. locked me out. but i still protected you. still stayed. because i love you."
you don't move, you don't breathe. "and now you're out here... in the dark... like prey." you flinch when he stops walking, right on the other side of the dumpster. you see his boots, splattered with old blood. "so," he says, chainsaw purring. "do you wanna come home like a good girl?"
silence.
"or do i have to drag you?"
you start crying, soft—silent. but he hears it, of course he does. he steps around the dumpster fast and grabs you by the wrist. you scream, but it's cut off as he pins you to the wall.
"you said you were mine," his face is right there. eyes glowing in the moonlight. hair wild. the chainsaw still buzzing at his side. "you lied to me." "jungwon—" "no," he snarls. "you don't get to say my name like that after running." you try to push him off but he presses his body into yours— not to hurt. but to hold, to trap.
his mouth grazes your ear, "say it again." you look up at him with glossy eyes, confusion swirling through them, "w-what—" "say you're mine." you hesitate, he lifts the chainsaw and lets it rest just beside your cheek. not cutting, not yet. but close enough to smell the metal.
"say it," he whispers. "i'm—i'm yours," you stutter back, your chest heaving heavily as you break eye contact with him. he exhales, you could feel his grip on your poor wrist loosen. the blade shuts off, the weight of it disappears from your face.
he presses a kiss to your lips, soft. sickeningly sweet. "good girl."
he brings you home.
your knees scrape the concrete as he walks you backwards the whole way—never taking his eyes off you. never letting you fall too far behind. he carries you up the stairs and sets you gently on your bed. pulls the blanket over you like a lullaby, his voice is low—affectionate. "you don't run again," his voice is low with warning but his face remains sweet.  "o-okay..." he kisses your forehead, "not ever."
"you don't need anything else but me," he lies down beside you again, arms tight around your waist. you don't sleep, you can't. you just stare at the wall, breathing slow—pretending. pretending this is love, pretending you chose this.
you learn quickly, how to smile when he walks in. how to eat every bite of breakfast, even when your stomach turns. how to say "thank you, wonnie," like you mean it. he lights up every time, like you're the sun.
like nothing else matters, "see?" he says, wiping your mouth gently after breakfast one morning. "you're perfect when you listen." you smile but your hands shake under the table.
he leans in and kisses your cheek, "i knew you just needed time." you nod and he leaves your room for a few minutes. you finally breathe, you're surviving. you're obeying. you don't ask about your phone. you don't ask to go outside. you don't bring up your missing manager, or the way jungwon keeps your blinds drawn at all times.
you play your part. his perfect girl. because you're going to get out, eventually.
he brings you a new hoodie one night, your favorite color. "i bought it for you," he says, holding it out. "wanted you to have something soft again." you take it with a small smile, "thank you, wonnie."
he beams, "see? we're so good like this. no lies. no running." you nod and let him kiss you. soft. slow. like he's not the same boy who held a chainsaw to your face. his hand grazes your thigh and you freeze up. "i've been patient," he murmurs, voice dipped in honey. "but you know i want more than just cuddles."
you tense, he notices. but smiles like he doesn't. "don't worry," he says, brushing your hair back. "i won't take anything you're not ready to give." you let out a small breath of air you didn't know you were holding, "...okay."
"but if you ever lie again... if you ever try to leave me..." his hand tightens on your leg and his eyes darken. "i won't be gentle." he doesn't say how, he doesn't need to.
days pass, you shower with the door cracked. eat every meal he gives you. you sit on the couch while he lies with his head in your lap, fingers curling around your wrist like a leash. sometimes he talks about normal things like his childhood. the first devil he killed and how lonely he was before he found you.
"they only ever wanted the chainsaw," he says, eyes flicking to you. "not me." you stay quiet, listening to him intently. "but you smiled at me. before you knew what i was." he leans in, "you saw me."
you wonder what would've happened if you hadn't. if you'd just screamed like anyone else. would he have let you go? or would he have chased you anyway?
"you were mine the second i saw you," he whispers. "you just didn't know it yet.”
⛧⃝
you find a cracked tile in the kitchen and behind it, tucked into the wall—your emergency phone. hidden and dead, but there. you tuck it in your hoodie pocket when he's not looking. and you smile a little wider the next time he brings you tea. you're getting closer.
"you're different now," jungwon says one night, curled beside you in bed. "calmer. softer. like you were meant to be mine." you press your face into his chest, his heart is steady. but you feel it beneath the surface—the storm always ready to break.
"i think we should go away," he says softly. "somewhere quiet. just us. no one else." your breath hitches, dread filling you instantly, "wonnie—" "someplace with no devils. no people. no café. just you and me." he strokes your cheek lovingly,  "you'd like that, right?"
you nod, slow and obedient. his grip on you tightens, "say it." you whimper, his hold on you becoming increasingly stronger, "i'd like that." he grins, "say you want to be mine forever."
"i want to be yours forever." he kisses you and somewhere deep inside, you start to wonder if this is your life now. if pretending long enough becomes real. if loving your captor ever stops feeling like pretending.
⛧⃝
you should've hidden it better.
you knew the moment he walked in—the air around him colder, thicker, like it held its breath the second he did. he doesn't speak, not right away. he just stands in the doorway, one hand clenched at his side, the other holding something loose and familiar by the cord.
your phone, dead—cracked. but found.
"baby," his voice is even, quiet. like someone controlling their rage just enough not to shatter the walls. "is this yours?" your mouth goes dry, you don't answer. you don't need to, he already knows. "i asked you a question."
"...it was just—i didn't use it, i swear—" he throws it, hard. it hits the wall beside your head, plastic bursting into shards that scatter across the floor.
you flinch, he doesn't like that. "you lied to me." he stalks toward you, you back up. "you smiled in my face. you said all the right things. you fucking cuddled me," he snarls, his persona shifting rapidly. "wonnie, please—" he grabs your arm and yanks you forward. "i gave you everything. i let you live. and this is what you do?"
"i wasn't going to leave—" you begin. "—you were planning it." he throws you onto the couch, your back hits the cushions hard. your head whips back from the force. he's on you in an instant— knee between your thighs, hand around your throat. not tight, yet.
"you think this is a game?" he breathes. "you think i won't hurt you?" his smile is gone, the softness is gone, all that's left is heat. sharp and cracked and pulsing behind his eyes like a storm about to explode.
"you promised," he hisses, dragging his chainsaw across the carpet behind him, metal teeth glinting. "you told me you were mine."
"i—I am—" you cry out. "then act like it," his grip tightens on your throat. just enough to remind you who's in control. just enough to make your vision swim. "if you lie to me again," he whispers, lips brushing your ear, "i'll cut your legs off."
you choke, his thumb caresses your cheek like he's trying to soothe you—like he didn't just threaten to cripple you.
"then you won't be able to run," he presses a soft kiss beneath your eye. your tears catch on his lips. "you'll still be pretty," he murmurs softly, his eyes running down your face as tears spill from your eyes like a faucet. "and i'll carry you everywhere. like a doll. my little pet."
he releases your throat. you gasp, broken—and curl into yourself. he kneels down and brushes your hair back. "do you understand now?" you nod. "say it," he grits, his mouth pulled into a soft smile. "i—I understand."
"say you're sorry," his dimples appear, his fingers threading into your hair like a threat. "i'm sorry, wonnie." you swallow harshly, "say you'll never lie again."
"i'll never lie again." he kisses your forehead, smiling genuinely now. soft again, like none of it happened. "good girl," and with that he pulls you into his lap and rocks you slowly. like you're just scared, like he's the one keeping you safe.
you don't eat that night and he doesn't make you. you lie in bed, numb—while he watches you, brushing your hair behind your ear like you're still his favorite thing. you close your eyes, not to sleep but to disappear.
you wake up to sunlight and soft sheets, and jungwon. already awake, already watching you. "you slept so long," he says, brushing his thumb along your cheekbone. "you looked peaceful." you nod, you don't feel peaceful. your body still remembers the bruising grip of his hand around your throat and the weight of the chainsaw across your floor.
but you smile. because that's what he wants, he beams back. "you've been so good lately." he kisses your forehead, then your nose, then your lips. lingering.
"i was thinking..." he murmurs, kissing your jaw now, trailing down your neck. "maybe we're ready for more." your breath stutters, he pauses. "i'm not asking for much," he whispers. "just a little more. just... let me touch you." you freeze, "wonnie..."
"you trust me, don't you?" you nod. his hand slides beneath your shirt, palm warm against your stomach. he doesn't go further. just stays there, thumb brushing softly. "see?" he breathes."you're okay. you're doing so well." you want to push him off. but he's smiling again, glowing like the sun.
"you don't have to do anything," he says, lips grazing your ear. "but you want to make me happy, right?" you nod again, your mind racing. "then just let me hold you. touch you a little. i've been so good, haven't i?"
his hands roam—slow and restrained like he's controlling himself. like he's earning this, and you let him. because you don't know what happens if you don't.
he takes you into the kitchen later, arms still around your waist like a leash in disguise. "you look so pretty when you let me take care of you," he says, kissing your shoulder. "you're finally acting like mine."
you try not to flinch when he says it, you try not to cry. "you want to wear something cute for me today?" he asks, digging through one of the bags he brought home. "i got you new pajamas. soft ones. you'll like them." you nod carefully, because it's easier than saying no. because maybe if you give him this, he won't take more.
but he always wants more. at night, he pulls you into bed. spooning you from behind, face buried in your neck. you could feel him, feel him push into you  his hands explore again but softer this time, tracing your ribs, your hips.
his voice low and warm, "i think about you all the time," he whispers into your ear, his cool breath fanning the shell of your ear. "even when i'm out killing devils, i think about you. about how warm you are. how soft you sound when you say my name."
you don't say anything. "you make me feel human," he murmurs."no one's ever made me feel like that before." his hand dips beneath your waistband and you tense.
"wonnie—" he stills. "...it's okay," he says, voice gentle again. "i told you. i won't do anything you don't want." he kisses your shoulder and withdraws his hand. you let out a small breath, your eyes shutting in relief.
but his breath is heavier now, his chest rising faster against your back. "soon, though," he whispers. "you'll want it. i know you will." his arms tighten around you, "because i love you. and no one will ever love you like i do."
you sleep like that—caged in his arms, heart racing and you wonder how long you can keep this up before your own body betrays you.
because he's careful, he's patient and he's so good at making you feel safe right before he breaks you again.
⛧⃝
you've barely spoken all morning, you keep your head down and your answers short. you keep your distance, well, as much as you can when you're trapped in a small apartment with someone who watches you like he's afraid you'll disappear.
you feel it building. the way his jaw twitches when you look away too long. the way he starts pacing, slow and controlled. and when you finally say the words. soft, trembling, like a match against gasoline,  "i need some space, wonnie."
everything ignites.
"space?" his voice cracks like a whip. "what the fuck does that mean?" you step back but he follows. "after everything? after i saved you? after i've been patient and sweet and, fuck—soft with you?" you try to explain, voice small,  "i just—i need to clear my head, that's all. just a day or two—"
"you don't get a day or two," he slams his hand into the wall beside your head. not touching you—but close enough to make your ears ring. enough to make your heart stop. "you don't get to push me away. not after how hard i've tried. not after how good i've been." his eyes are wild and glassy. he's breathing hard.
"you smiled at me," he says, broken. "you kissed me. you told me i made you feel safe." you don't know what to say. because you meant it, initially. you just didn't mean for it to become this. "you made me hope," he whispers, a sharp kind of pain in his voice. "you made me think you loved me."
"i—I'm sorry, I didn't mean—" he cuts you off, "you did." he grabs your shoulders—hard and pulls you close, forehead pressed to yours. "don't make me beg, baby," his voice drops, desperate. "don't make me fucking beg you to stay."
you feel his body shake, you're not sure if it's from rage or heartbreak. maybe both. his lips brush yours, "say you love me," he whispers. you hesitate, just for a second. his hands tighten,  "say it."
"i love you," you breathe, barely audible. his whole body stills, then softens. he exhales like he's been holding his breath for years. "there's my girl," he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your cheek. "i knew you didn't mean it. i knew you were just scared."
he lifts you—literally picks you up and carries you to the bedroom like he's claiming what's his. "you don't need space," he says, laying you down. "you need me." he kisses you, slow and deep and wrong. his hands slide under your shirt again. but this time, you don't stop him—you can't. because you saw it, the split-second flicker behind his eyes.
the one that said: if you leave, i'll burn the whole world down.
⛧⃝
you wake up before him, you think. jungwon's arm is around your waist, heavy and warm. his breath tickles the back of your neck. you stay still for a moment, heart pounding.
then you slowly slip out of bed, he doesn't move.
you crush the sleeping pills into powder and stir them into the yogurt he left out for you. he always makes your breakfast now, always waits for you to eat the whole thing while he watches.
but today, you insist he eat it instead.
"you're always taking care of me," you say with a soft smile. "just let me take care of you for once, okay?" he melts and kisses your hand. "you're getting so sweet," he whispers lovestruck.
he finishes it all and now you wait. you watch the weight of sleep start to drag down his eyes. and when he slumps forward on the couch, arms loose, breathing heavy—you run.
you don't bring your broken and smashed up phone. don't bring clothes. you don't even grab your shoes. you just run barefoot, wild, breath sharp in your chest—through streets that still smell like blood and ash.
you don't know where you're going, you just know you have to be gone. but somewhere, hours later, in a small alley behind the metro station— you stop.
because it was too easy, you look behind you and feel sick. because there's no way jungwon would let you go that easily. he should've woken up. should've chased you.
you feel the shift before you see him, the air goes still—cold. and then: "you crushed the pills too fine." his voice is behind you, calm. close. "slipped into the yogurt perfectly though. smart girl." you turn and you see him leaning against the wall like he's been there all day. no chainsaw, no blood. just that same soft hoodie and a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.
"i wanted to see where you'd go," he says softly. "who you'd run to." he steps closer, you step back. "but you didn't call anyone," he laughs. "you didn't have a plan."
he tilts his head, staring down at you with an unreadable expression, "you just... ran." you say nothing and he smiles. "i should be mad," he moves closer again, voice lower now. "but honestly, it just makes me love you more." his hands slide into his pockets, "i mean, you didn't even really want to leave, did you?" he cocks his head to the side,  "you're scared. confused. but deep down, you know you belong with me."
your throat feels tight, "why are you here?" you whisper. "because you're mine," he shrugs. "and i figured i'd give you a head start. make it feel real." you feel yourself shake as you watch jungwon straighten up his posture, "but you're done now."
he closes the distance completely and presses his forehead to yours, "game's over, baby." you don't remember the walk back but you remember the pressure of his hand wrapped around your wrist. you remember the silence, tight and eerie—as jungwon guided you home like you were sleepwalking.
no yelling, no chainsaw. just a soft, lingering disappointment that cut deeper than violence ever could. "i gave you everything," he murmured once, almost to himself. "and you still ran."
back inside, the world feels smaller. every corner watched and every door locked. he sits you on the edge of the bed like a doll, crouches in front of you with his hands on your knees.
"it's okay," he says, almost as if he was trying to sympathize with you. "you're scared. i get it." he cups your cheek with aching tenderness. "you don't trust yourself yet. but i do. i always have." you stay still, silent.
his smile doesn't reach his eyes anymore, "so i'm going to help you," he whispers. "from now on, no more decisions, okay?" his hands slide down to your thighs, thumbs stroking softly. "you don't need to think anymore."
"i'll think for you."
he's not gentle that night. not with his kisses, not with his grip, not with his touch. he doesn't force you, never crosses that final line, but he doesn't ask either. he undresses you slowly, holds you down like a possession being reclaimed.
"you're mine," he says into your skin. "and i'm going to make sure you remember that." he kisses your stomach, your hips. then dips a brush into black ink and paints his name in neat hangul letters just above your heart.
"jungwon," he says, smiling like it's a wedding vow. "belongs to." he stares at it for a long time, then at you. "i'll do it permanently soon," he whispers.
"carve it if i have to."
the next morning, your phone is gone. your shoes are gone. "just until you stop panicking," jungwon explains while brushing your hair. "you'll thank me later." you don't speak, you don't dare look at him in the eyes.
"you're doing so well," he says sweetly, his voice chirpy. "you're already so much more obedient." he kisses your shoulder, "soon you won't even want to leave." and somehow, that's what scares you the most. you wake up in his bed again, it was no longer yours. but this time, the warmth is gone. the sheets are tucked tighter and jungwon is sitting in the corner of the room—watching.
his eyes are soft, his smile is small but something in the air has shifted. you know he's not going to ask anymore. "did you sleep well?" he says softly, you nod. your throat is dry and the feeling of dread consumes you slowly.  "good," he murmurs, standing slowly. "because we're starting over now."
he walks toward you with slow, steady steps. "the way i see it..." he sits beside you, brushing hair behind your ear, "you weren't ready to make decisions. so i'm taking that pressure off you." he leans in, "you don't need to think anymore," he smiles at you, like he was making your life easier. "you don't need to want anything. i'll do all that for you."
you feel the weight of it settle in your chest like stone, but you nod.
he doesn't leave the house that day. or the day after. he cooks for you, feeds you, bathes you— always watching. the door stays locked, your phone is gone and the television plays static or nothing at all. every time you hesitate, he tilts his head and says: "are you forgetting what happened when i let you choose?"
and every time, you swallow your pride and obey.
on the third day, you cry. quietly, in the bathroom, with the sink running, he knocks once. "are you done?" his voice had began to suffocate you. "or do you need me to come help?" you wipe your face and open the door. he kisses your temple like you've done something good. "see? progress."
at night, he holds you like you're his peace. arms wrapped tight, breath steady on the back of your neck. "i forgive you, you know," he whispers. "for trying to run." you stay still, you stay quiet.  "but you'll never get that chance again," he presses a kiss to your shoulder. "next time you try to leave, i won't be this gentle."
you stop counting the days. at first, it was just survival—getting through one morning, one meal, one long, quiet night curled up in jungwon's arms like a prisoner pretending she wants to be held. but soon, it gets harder to remember how long it's been.
the clocks have disappeared from the walls and jungwon's answers when you ask what time it is, what day it is— always come with a soft smile. "does it matter?" he'd say. "you're safe now. that's all you need to know."
he brings home clothes for you now. long skirts. soft sweaters, white lace trimmed with ribbons. you'd flush a deep red when you'd discover the lacy and raunchy undergarments you'd find at the bottom of the bags.
"you look better like this," he murmurs as he zips one dress up slowly behind you. "like you're already mine." he takes your picture, just one and prints it and pins it to the fridge. "our beginning," he whispers. "the real one."
you don't ask what that means but he keeps calling this the start of something. keeps saying you're going to be so happy soon.
he cooks every meal himself, won't let you touch the knives. won't let you wash dishes, he says the soap dries out your hands. you sit at the table and eat the food he plates for you, always arranged into little shapes—hearts, stars, flowers made from rice or sliced fruit.
"i want everything around you to be soft," he tells you one afternoon. "no more sharp things. no more running." his hand comes down gently on your thigh. "you don't need the outside world. you don't even like it out there, do you?"
you hesitate, his grip tightens slightly. "do you?" his voice carried a warning.  "...no," you say. he smiles, "good girl."
at night, he talks about the future. his voice is warm, sweet, dangerous. "we'll get married soon," he says, fingers playing with yours beneath the covers. "it doesn't have to be legal. just real. just ours."
"i can fix up the spare room. make it a nursery, maybe. or just a space for you to paint. you like painting, right?" you don't answer, you're not sure anymore. "and when you're ready..." he leans in closer, breath fanning over your cheek, "i want to give you a baby."
you flinch but he doesn't react.
"you'd be so good at it," he murmurs. "i'll take care of everything. you won't have to lift a finger." he continues, "you'll never have to be afraid again."
you try to keep track of your thoughts. you write on napkins and hide them under the mattress. little scraps of memory: my name is __ he has a chainsaw. no. he is the chainsaw i don't want to be here not safe but by the next morning, they're gone and jungwon is extra affectionate that day. "you were talking in your sleep again," he says while brushing your hair. "sounded like you were having a nightmare."
his hand cups the back of your neck, "i got rid of it for you." you nod, because what else can you do?
one night, after a particularly quiet dinner, he asks if you're feeling okay. you nod, he studies you. "you're not lying to me, right?" he asks, his brows scrunching in concern. "you'd tell me if something was wrong?" you hesitate for half a second too long and just like that, the softness slips. he grabs your chin, not hard, but enough to make you freeze.
"i need to know you're happy," he whispers, voice trembling with something sharp and volatile beneath it. "because if you're not, then i must be doing something wrong. and i can't—i won't fail you again."
his pupils are blown wide, his breath stutters. his hand shakes slightly as he releases you. "...say you're happy." you swallow the lump in your throat, "i'm happy."
he exhales like he just pulled you back from a cliff. he pulls you into his lap and holds you tight. "see? i knew you'd feel it eventually."he presses a kiss to the side of your head, "we're just getting started."
it starts small, a hand on your thigh when he's reading beside you. a kiss on your shoulder before bed, lips lingering longer than before. fingers brushing the curve of your spine when he helps you change clothes.
"you're so soft," he whispers one morning, hand tracing your bare leg under the blanket. "i never get tired of touching you." you stay still, your eyes on the ceiling.
he doesn't go further, well, not yet.but the weight of his desire hangs heavy in the air now. like heat in a locked room with no windows.
he lets you bathe alone for the first time in days. but when you come out, towel wrapped tightly around yourself, he's standing in the doorway with a folded nightgown and a smile. "you forgot your clothes," he says sweetly.
you take the time to look at him, blonde fluffy hair, porcelain skin, dimples, a warm smile and doe eyes. if things were different and he wasn't a delusional psychopath then maybe jungwon would've been your dream man. however, he is a delusional psychopath and this is a nightmare.
"you must've been distracted," he cooed softly. you try to take the gown from him, but he steps in close. slowly, carefully—he starts dressing you himself. like you're porcelain, like you'll shatter if he moves too fast. his fingers graze your bare skin, your collarbones, your hips.
he doesn't touch where he shouldn't, but he touches everywhere else. "you're so good for me now," he murmurs. "so quiet. so calm. i can feel it...you're finally starting to love me." you open your mouth—to object, maybe. or scream. cry.
but nothing comes out and jungwon just smiles. "that's okay. you don't have to say it. i already know."
that night, he holds you closer. one arm locked around your waist, the other trailing slow circles over your stomach, your ribs, the swell of your chest through your shirt.
"this is mine," he says softly, his fingertip dancing right over your chest. "every part of you is mine." you flinch when he presses a kiss just below your ear—gentle, reverent. but he doesn't stop.
"i could make you feel so good," he breathes. "you don't even have to do anything. just... let me." his hand slips beneath your shirt, warmer now. firmer. but still slow, still soft. he's waiting for a word, maybe a sound—anything.
and when you don't give it, he pauses. just for a second. "not yet?" he says, like he's disappointed in himself. "that's okay. i can wait. i'll wait forever if i have to." he nuzzles into your hair, kissing the back of your neck. "but one day," he murmurs, voice lower now—dangerous. "you're going to want it."
the next morning, you wake up to find he's changed all the sheets. the house smells like vanilla and warmth. breakfast is waiting with your favorite drink sitting by your plate.
"i want today to be special," he says, glee present on his handsome face. "you've been so good lately." you force a smile, but your hands shake when you hold the glass. you know what's coming, you can feel it.
he's not going to stop until you say yes. and you're starting to wonder what will happen when you finally do.
the day turns out to be quiet, something you weren't expecting—but you weren't complaining.
no chainsaw noises from the basement. no news playing in the background. no scraping of locks or clattering of breakfast dishes.
just silence.
and the faint scent of jasmine in the hallway. you step out of the bedroom cautiously, bare feet on the cold wood floor. the apartment is different, candles line the floor, flickering soft gold. petals—real, crushed, pink and red are scattered like breadcrumbs from your room to the living room.
and in the center of it all—jungwon. in a clean white shirt, hair brushed, lips pink. smiling at you like you're the sun returning after years of rain.
"happy honeymoon," he says gently.
you don't answer. you just stand there, frozen, trying to make sense of what's real. "i know it's silly," he laughs, rubbing the back of his neck, "but i wanted to do something special. you've been so good for me. i wanted to thank you."
he walks over slowly, reaching for your hand. you let him take it, because what else is there to do? "sit down," he murmurs. "let me take care of everything tonight."
he serves you dinner at the table. pasta—your favourite, garlic bread, wine and dessert. you don't ask how he got it all and you don't dare ask if it's drugged. you just eat and he watches with stars in his eyes.
"this is what i always wanted," he says. "just us. no fear. no noise. no one getting in the way." he reaches across the table and laces his fingers through yours. "don't you feel it now?" he asks softly. "how good we could be, if you stopped pretending you didn't want me?"
your throat closes. he's still smiling—but it's tighter now. thinner. "i know you want me," he says again, a strange look on his face. "you've always wanted me." his hand slides over your knuckles, slow and steady."even when i scare you. even when i hurt people for you. even when you try to run."
"you always come back."
you want to pull away, but he's already standing. "don't worry," he whispers, bending down behind your chair. "i won't rush you." his hands slip onto your shoulders and his lips find your neck. you freeze. "you're mine," he murmurs against your skin. "every piece of you. and tonight, i want to show you what that means."
you don't remember how you get to the bedroom. but suddenly you're there—lights low, sheets fresh, jungwon kneeling at the foot of the bed. "take this off for me?" he whispers, brushing your shirt. "please?" you hesitate, he tilts his head.
"i said please," he repeats. "don't make me beg." his voice is still soft—still velvet. but there's something under it now, something sharp and heavy and impatient. you reach for the hem of your shirt with shaking fingers, he watches every movement like it's holy.
"that's it," he breathes. "that's my girl." you pause when it's off—bra still on, arms crossed hiding what you can. he doesn't push, just leans forward and presses a single kiss to your ribs.
"i won't do anything you don't want," he says gently. "but you do want me, don't you?" your silence hangs too long and jungwon sighs—quiet, frustrated, before leaning up and kissing you fully on the mouth.
slow. wet. deep.
he tastes like wine and something unplaceable—warm, overwhelming, dangerous. when he pulls back, he whispers: "you're lying to yourself."
that night, he touches you everywhere but where you dread. hands tracing over your stomach, your thighs, the backs of your knees, your spine. he worships your body like it belongs to him—like you've always belonged to him. and when he finally falls asleep beside you, arms locked tight around your waist, you realize something terrifying: you almost leaned into it.
for just a second, you wanted him to keep going. not because you love him, not because you're ready. but because it would be easier than saying no again.
your eyes are still open when he stirs beside you, the warmth of his breath hitting your shoulder. "can't sleep?" he whispers, voice thick with softness and sleep. you don't respond, his arm tightens around your waist, tugging you closer. you can feel the weight of his chest against your back—steady, calm, alive.
"you're tense," he murmurs. "i can feel it. right here—" his hand glides over your stomach slowly, resting low, too low. you swallow hard. "i want to help you," he says. "let me?"
you shake your head, barely a movement—barely even a sound. but he catches it, "shh, it's okay. i'm not asking for anything. i just want to make you feel good." he kisses the back of your neck—slowly, reverently.
"you've done so much for me," he whispers, each word like silk against your skin. "you've been so brave. so patient. you let me love you even when you didn't know how." his hand slips lower and you tense—not quite fighting, not quite yielding. "you deserve to feel safe," he breathes. "to feel... pleasure. let me give that to you. just once."
his fingers toy with the waistband of your shorts. "i won't ask for anything back," he promises. "i won't even kiss you unless you want it." suddenly your no longer on your side when jungwon spooning you. he's looming over you now, his blonde locks falling over his face as he cages you between his arms.
he shifts to kneel between your legs, gently nudging them apart—slowly, like you're breakable. you don't stop him, you don't say yes either.
you just lie there, frozen in place, as he pulls your shorts down and presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh—soft, reverent, desperate. you hold in the urge to squeeze your legs together in attempts to hide yourself from his gaze. you could tell how pleased he was, the evidence was poking the back of your thigh. you saw his tongue jut out to wet his lips, his eyes never leaving the thin lace material that covered you.
"i've wanted this for so long," he whispers. "to taste you. to feel you fall apart for me." he leans down, his stomach on the bed and his hands gripping your thighs—prying them apart. his breath fans over your core, and you flinch but still don't move. he glances up at you once, dark eyes gleaming in the candlelight.
"you're shaking," he murmurs. "it's okay. i've got you." he lands a soft kiss where you felt it most, over the fabric. you stiffen at the feeling, your core throbbing as you watch jungwon push your panties to the side.
then, he leans in. his mouth is warm, soft, slow. he doesn't rush. his tongue slides down your slit, grazing your clit ever so slightly. you tremble, pursing your lips to hold back any moans from escaping. your eyes roll to the back of your head when he pushes your thighs back completely and begins to, what you coukd only describe, as making out with your cunt.
he kisses like he's praying—like every flick of his tongue is an offering. his tongue laves against you, sucking after ever kiss and swipe of his tongue. he doesn't allow his attention to fall anywhere else, focusing on your clit.
he hums against you when your hips twitch, when your thighs tremble. "that's it," he breathes. "just let go. just for me." you couldn't help but let soft moans escape your mouth, mentally cursing yourself.
you gasp, quiet, helpless—fingers curling into the sheets. you could feel the knot in your stomach begin to tight with every flick of his tongue. and he moans like he's the one coming undone.
"so sweet," he mutters. "so fucking mine." when your legs close around his head, he lets them and doesn't stop. he just holds you there, mouth relentless, tongue deep and slow, devouring like it's the only way to live.
you cry out when you feel your high wash over you, your body shaking and jungwon moans into you—helping you ride it out. when you finish—shaking, breath caught in your throat, he doesn't say anything at first. he just lays his head on your thigh, breathing hard.
"i love you," he says softly. "even if you don't say it back. i'll wait." he kisses the inside of your knee. "but one day... you will."
⛧⃝
you stop noticing the time. you don't know if it's morning or night anymore, because the lights are always dimmed, the curtains always drawn. outside, the city could be burning and you wouldn't know. inside, jungwon touches you like he's trying to make you forget it exists.
he doesn't ask anymore.
not for permission. not for your attention. not even for your affection. he wakes before you most days, tucked warm under the blankets, mouth already between your legs—worshipping like it's a habit. like it's his version of good morning.
and you don't fight it, you barely even flinch. you just stare at the ceiling, mouth dry, fingers limp in the sheets while his tongue works you open with slow, languid patience. sometimes he moans when you twitch. sometimes he whispers things, sweet, sinful things—into the skin of your thighs.
"that's it, baby..."
"let me taste what's mine..."
"i love waking you up like this. you're always so wet for me..."
he never asks you to touch him in return, never forces your hand. never begs for more. but the way he looks at you after, wide-eyed, breathless, expectant—makes your skin crawl. like he's waiting, like he's trying not to snap.
you catch him staring more, when you're reading on the couch. when you're brushing your hair. when you laugh a little too long at something on TV. he watches like he's memorizing every detail, but not out of love—out of fear.
fear that you'll slip away. fear that you'll wake up and run. fear that what he's built here, this dream, this trap—will shatter.
"do you like it here?" he asks one night. you nod, because you have to. because your voice doesn't work the way it used to. "you're quiet lately," he adds, brushing your cheek. "you used to fight more." you glance away, "i miss that fire," he says softly, lips brushing your ear. "but this version of you... i like her too. soft. obedient. mine."
you feel something hollow open in your chest.
you try to plan, when he leaves for a supply run. when he showers with the door locked. when he naps after eating you out until your legs give out. you think about doors, windows, stairwells. you think about timing, about pills, about hiding money in the lining of your coat.
you think about running, but then you remember the chainsaw. you remember the way he looked, blood-drenched and smiling—the night he saved you. you remember the sound it made when he turned it on, and how easily it tore through bone.
"you're mine," he had whispered that night. "you smiled at me first. you don't get to take that back."
sometimes, when you lie awake pretending to sleep, he wraps his arms around you and murmurs things into your hair. "i know you're still scared," he says. "but one day you'll understand this is love," he continues. "one day, you'll thank me for saving you."
he kisses your neck, "you'll see. you'll see. you'll see—" and you lie there, still as death, wondering if maybe you never smiled at all.
⛧⃝
you start with small things. a bottle of water hidden behind the back panel of the bathroom cabinet. a wad of cash that you had gathered from around the house tucked beneath a loose floorboard by the bed. a sweater rolled tight and pushed into the gap under the couch.
jungwon doesn't notice, he still looks at you like you're the only thing in the world worth breathing for. like your smile was the last good thing left in a ruined city.
and so you smile, you kiss him goodnight. you let him between your thighs when he wakes up needy. you even tell him he tastes sweet when he presses soft kisses into your skin and hums like he belongs there. "i love when you say things like that," he whispers, licking his lips. "you're finally getting it."
but he doesn't notice the way your hands shake when you cook. he doesn't notice the extra pills you keep hidden in the lining of your hoodie pocket. he doesn't notice that this time—when you crush them into his tea you don't take his advice.
you don't make it fine, you make it heavy—potent. enough to keep him down. "you sure you don't want any?" he asks, sipping the tea, eyes soft. you shake your head, "already brushed my teeth." he laughs and taps your chin with his thumb, "so good for me now."
he falls asleep earlier than usual. his breathing turns deep, chest rising and falling with slow, heavy rhythm. you wait, 20 minutes, then 30. then another 10, just to be sure.
you press your fingers to his neck, pulse thick and sluggish. he's out. you move quickly, silently. coat. money. water. shoes. you skip the sweater under the couch—too risky. your heart's hammering in your chest as you step over the threshold, fingers closing around the doorknob, twisting it slowly—
click.
the door creaks and you freeze. jungwon doesn't stir. you slip into the hallway, pulling the door shut behind you with a soft click. you don't breathe until you've made it down the first two flights of stairs. the city is cold tonight, silent. the kind of quiet that makes you feel watched.
but you keep going, you don't look back. 2 blocks down, you finally stop. your hands are shaking and your legs are numb. but you made it, you got out. just before you could do your happy dance, your dreams shatter.
"where are you going, baby?"
your blood runs cold. his voice was soft, gentle, sweet—floats in from the mouth of the alley behind you. you turn, he's standing there in the shadows, hands at his sides. still in his sleep shirt, barefoot and smiling.
"you didn't really think i drank it, did you?" he asks. he takes one slow step forward. "you think i'd sleep through you slipping around like that? hiding things from me? lying to me?" his tone doesn't rise, he doesn't shout. he doesn't need to. he just looks at you like you broke his fucking heart.
"i let you go," he whispers. "i watched you walk out. i gave you a chance." another step."and now i know." you step back, shaking. "now i know you'll run from me every time." he tilts his head, voice dropping. "so i'm not gonna let you anymore."
then, his arm shifts. you hear the click and suddenly, it's there. the chainsaw. not in his hand—but part of it. the metal gleams under the streetlight, slick and humming.
his smile is still soft, his voice is still calm. but there's something in his eyes now—something raw, betrayed, unhinged. "you said you were mine," he says. "even if you didn't say it out loud, you let me inside you. you let me love you." he lifts the chainsaw—not revving it, just holding it. like a warning, like a leash.
"so now you're not leaving," he says. "i'll make sure of it." you don't scream, even as jungwon grabs you by the wrist. even as he yanks you into his chest, cradles your head, and whispers, "it's okay, i've got you." even as the cold metal of the chainsaw brushes against your side like a threat he doesn't even have to say aloud.
"you're shaking," he murmurs, brushing your hair back. "are you cold? scared? don't be. we're going home." he's gentle, that's the worst part. he doesn't drag you down the alley—he guides you, arm wrapped around your waist, chin resting on your shoulder like this is all just some sad misunderstanding.
"i gave you everything," he breathes. "i touched you like you were sacred." you don't reply, you can't. he smells like warm skin and blood and something sharp, like metal. "and you still ran from me."
he doesn't say another word until the door shuts behind you, your coat is stripped off. your bag is kicked aside and then you're in the living room again—where the lights are too dim and the air smells like stale sweat and sleep and him.
he lets go, lets you fall onto the couch like a dropped doll. you sit there, frozen. he disappears into the kitchen, comes back a moment later with the tea cup you'd drugged. "this," he says, holding it up, "was cute." he sets it on the table in front of you, "you really thought that'd work again?"
he crouches in front of you, slow, fluid, tilting his head like he's studying you. "you've been lying to me," he says, not angry but hurt. "smiling. moaning. kissing me back. and it was all fake." you open your mouth to deny it, but he grabs your chin fast—firm but not rough.
"don't," he snaps. "don't lie again. not now." his hand shakes. "you let me taste you," he whispers, eyes shining. "you let me fall in love with your body. your sounds. the way you twitch when i kiss your clit just right," you flinch at his words. "and then you tried to disappear."
his voice breaks, barely above a whisper and he leans in closer. "do you have any idea what that does to me?" and for the first time in weeks—you see it. not the softness, not the sweetness. but the madness underneath it.
he kisses you suddenly—hard, desperate, messy. like he's trying to prove something. "you're never doing that again," he mutters against your lips. "i won't let you run. i won't let anyone take you." his hands skim your sides, up your ribs, pressing too tight. you shove at him and he freezes. he looks at you, really looks at you. like he wants to be good, like he wants to stop. but then he closes his eyes, breathing hard, and says: "you made me like this."
and then he gets up disappears into the hallway. comes back with a knife in hand—still silent, not pointed at you, but there. a threat. you failed to understand why his weapon of choice was a knife and not his arm, the chainsaw.
he sets it on the table, right next to the tea cup. "i don't want to hurt you," he says, voice soft again. "but you don't get to hurt me either."
that night, you sleep in the same bed. his arms around you, his breath warm on your neck. the knife flat against the nightstand like it belongs there. he didn't want to use himself as a weapon against you, it made sense to you now.
and in the dark, as he kisses the back of your shoulder and murmurs "mine, mine, mine" into your skin—you realize something.
you're not planning your next escape, you're planning his destruction.
he falls asleep fast. one arm around your waist, face pressed between your shoulder blades, murmuring quiet, broken apologies into your skin like he thinks he deserves forgiveness just for feeling sorry.
"don't leave me again."
"you belong with me. you know that."
"i'll be good. better. just stay."
but you're not listening. you're watching the knife where it rests beside the bed. the quiet metallic hum still rings in your ears. his arm is normal, it doesn't glow, doesn't breathe, but it feels as if the chainsaw is there and alive. like a part of him that can't ever really be turned off. you wonder if he'd use it on you if you tried to run again, he had threatened you with it before. why not now? will he again in the future? you wonder if he'd cry afterward.
i let you go. i gave you a chance.
you close your eyes, breathe. you've never felt more trapped. there's no one left to call. your parents are dead, your phone is still gone. your coworkers think you're in love and the city outside is worse than he is—filled with devils that eat humans whole.
jungwon saved you from that, he reminds you of it every time he eats you out in the morning. every time he kisses your throat and whispers, "i'm the only reason you're still breathing."
and the worst part? he's right.
but tonight, you feel something shift. the numbness doesn't feel so hollow anymore. it feels like stone1-something you could carve a plan into, something hard enough to carry hate. you lie still for hours, eyes open, mind racing. you imagine stabbing him in his sleep, burning the apartment down with him inside.
you picture it all—every version of his death. you imagine your hands slick with his blood and your heart finally beating without fear. but there's a problem, you don't know how to kill a devil.
especially not your devil. the next morning, you smile. you kiss him when he wakes you up by sliding under the sheets and parting your thighs like it's his god-given right. you moan when his mouth closes over you. you say thank you when he finishes, even though your chest is hollow and your eyes don't match your lips.
he doesn't notice. he nuzzles into your side like he's proud of himself, like he thinks love still lives here. "you're so good for me now," he murmurs, kissing your ribs. "knew you'd come around."
you stroke his hair and you start to lie. not the small lies, the ones he's used to. but new ones. cold ones. dangerous ones. you start to ask questions with wide eyes, "what would happen if you got sick?" or "are chainsaw people immune to poison?" and "how does the chainsaw part work again?"
he answers them, slowly—suspiciously. but you're careful, you let him eat you out whenever he wants. you cook for him, you hold his hand. you say "i missed you" when he comes home even though you never left the apartment. "i'm happy now," you tell him one night. "i think i was scared before. but i'm not anymore."
he watches you closely, he doesn't believe you—not fully. but he wants to and you let that desire blind him. because underneath your smile, your skin, your warmth—you're already planning the kill.
"baby," he says, voice low from the kitchen, "come sit." you don't hesitate. not even when you see what he's made—pancakes, eggs, sausage. your favorite, but that's not what matters. it's the two plates on the table, identical. his and yours but he hasn't touched his yet and he's watching you.
"i thought you'd be hungry," he murmurs, running his fingers along your chair as he pulls it out. "figured you needed something warm. grounding." you sit and you thank him. he sits too—and then folds his hands. he's not eating, you pick up your fork. "go on," he says, smiling. "i made it with love."
your stomach tightens, he's testing you. because of the pills, because of that time you cooked. you glance down at your plate, it smells fine, it looks perfect. but that's what he said about you once. you chew slowly, you swallow. he watches every bite.
"you've been so sweet lately," he says after a moment, eyes soft. "it's nice." he picks up his fork. takes one small bite from his own plate. chews, swallows, sets the fork down again. "but you know what they say." he leans forward. "sweet girls can be liars."
you smiles—soft, demure, every inch the broken little thing he thinks you are now."i'm not lying." he grins, "mm." he tilts his head. "then prove it." you blink, he reaches into his hoodie pocket and pulls out a small vial—clear liquid. viscous. almost glowing.
"this is devil toxin," he says, voice still gentle. "you only need a drop. just one." your chest turns to ice. "you want to show me you're loyal?" he sets the vial beside your cup of tea. "drink it." you stare at it, "jungwon—" his grin gets wider, "i'll suck it out of you if it hurts," he whispers, smiling too wide. "you know i'll take care of you. don't you trust me?"
no. never: but you can't say that. you wrap your hand around the teacup, the vial sits beside it like a promise. he leans in, "prove it," he whispers again. your heart hammers in your throat and slowly—so slowly, you lift the vial and tip one drop into the tea.
it hisses, even smokes a little. but doesn't change color, you drink. you smile; you don't die.
he exhales and you know two things immediately: 1. it wasn't enough to kill you. 2. next time, it might be.
"good girl," he says, voice filled with something almost tender. "you're getting so good at being mine." he kisses your temple, you hold your breath. and you think: i have to kill him first. the knock comes mid-morning, you're still shaking from the tea—not because of the toxin, but because of what it meant.
jungwon had to see you drink it, he wanted to watch. your loyalty, served hot. and now he's humming in the kitchen like he didn't just force you to poison yourself. the knock comes again, "package," a voice calls through the door. "from the devil patrol."
you flinch, jungwon wipes his hands on a towel, glancing toward the door. "ah. that's the neighbor." neighbor? you didn't know you had one. he opens the door and greets him like they're friends. "yo," jungwon says, too casual. "thanks. was wondering when that would come."
"no problem, man." the guy is young, tall and lean wearing a battered jacket with the devil patrol emblem stitched to the chest. "i figured i'd drop it off personally. lots of freaks running around this district lately."
you step closer, jungwon doesn't look back—but he knows you're there. you can feel it in the way his body stiffens. "she's cute," the neighbor says suddenly, peeking past him. you freeze, jungwon doesn't. he laughs, a soft, too-sweet laugh.
"yeah," he says. "she's mine." his. not my girlfriend. not my partner. just mine. the guy raises his hands, "damn. got it."
but you make eye contact with him, just for a second. your eyes plead and your hand trembles. and you manage to take one single step forward before jungwon subtly presses a hand behind his back—where you know the chainsaw can come out, just out of view.
the guy pauses, his eyes flicker between you and jungwon. he opens his mouth—then closes it again. "take care," he mutters, handing the box over. "she's lucky to have you."
jungwon smiles and slams the door shut, the silence afterward is unbearable. you turn, but he's already behind you. smiling, still smiling. but it's not real, not this time. "you looked at him," he says softly. "like i wasn't standing right here."
you swallow, "jungwon—" "did you want him to help you?" he steps forward. "was that your plan?" you immediately shake your head, "i didn't—"
"or was it just fun?" he grabs your face, gentle but unyielding. "flirting like that in front of me? after everything i've done for you?" his voice stays even, calm—like this is just a conversation. but his fingers press harder against your jaw. "i let you live," he says quietly. "i let you eat, sleep, breathe."
"you said you loved me—"
"i do." his voice breaks slightly, but his eyes don't. "and i'll kill for you. i'll kill you, if you make me." you don't cry, you don't flinch, you just stare. because for the first time, you understand— jungwon isn't trying to win you over anymore. he already thinks you belong to him.
now he's just making sure you don't forget it. "i let you eat, sleep, breathe," his voice still echoes in your head. he's watching you now, silent, the way a storm watches a city before it floods. you sit on the edge of the bed, he hasn't moved since the neighbor left and you haven't either.
until finally, "get up," he says. "on your knees." you blink, "jungwon—" "you wanted him, didn't you?" his voice is deceptively soft, like he's sad. like you hurt him. "you looked at him like that on purpose. i'm not stupid."
you shake your head, "no—i didn't—" "then prove it." he takes a step forward and you tense. he crouches in front of you, kneels down, and cups your face with both hands. his thumbs brush under your eyes like he's checking for lies. "say sorry." you do, but it's not enough. "mean it." "i do—"
he tsk's, "then make it up to me," his voice dips. low, needy, possessive. "you're mine. you said it. you live here. you sleep in my bed. so act like it." he pushes you back onto the mattress—not rough, but assertive. it happens so fast you barely register it. his hands go under your shirt, he mouths at your neck and you shiver. "i don't want anything from you," he whispers, breath hot against your skin. "i just need to feel you. need to know you're still here. still mine."
his mouth moves lower, "you're not allowed to want anyone else. you understand that, right?" you nod. he doesn't see, so you say it. "yes."
"say you're mine."
"i'm yours."
"say you'll never leave me again."
your heart stutters, his tongue is already sliding between your thighs. "say it."
"i won't—i won't leave you." he groans like your promise is something holy. "good girl," he whispers, voice dark. "then take it." he doesn't ask for anything in return, not tonight. but his mouth is relentless—all-consuming. obsessive. he makes you cum twice, never breaking eye contact. every twitch, every moan, every desperate gasp is proof that you're his.
after, when you're limp and shaky, he pulls you into his lap and strokes your hair. "see?" he murmurs. "you don't need anyone else." you don't answer and you don't sleep. because you know now—he's getting too comfortable.
you were always a prize, but now you're a possession and there's no version of this story where he lets you go.
⛧⃝
it starts the night he falls asleep with his arm over your waist, breath warm against your neck, fingers curled loosely around your wrist like a shackle he forgot he was holding. you stay still until his breathing evens out. until the weight of his presence stops pressing and starts simply existing.
then, slowly, carefully—you slide out of his hold. your bare feet hit the floor without a sound. the apartment is silent except for the ticking of that damn broken clock on the kitchen wall. the one jungwon refuses to fix. "i like how it always says 3 a.m.," he told you once. "feels like time stops when we're together." you believed him then, now you're not so sure.
you pull on one of his oversized shirts—not because you want to, but because your own clothes are gone. thrown out weeks ago after your little 'drugging my tea' incident.
"you don't need them," he said. "you look better in mine." the kitchen is cold, your fingertips skim the edges of drawers, cabinets, picture frames. you don't know what you're looking for until you find it. a panel behind the bottom bookshelf — barely noticeable, like someone meant to hide it. you pry it open.
inside: a leather-bound notebook, pages yellowed, brittle, ink smudged with time. you flip it open. "chainsaw devil sighted in busan. not a contract. a merger." your blood runs cold. page after page, detailed logs from a devil hunter. someone who knew what jungwon became, someone who saw it happen.
"the chainsaw devil doesn't just make pacts," one entry reads. "it devours. it possesses. it feasts on obsession—especially the kind that pretends to be love." you keep reading, "once the host gives in emotionally, there's no going back. the only way to break the bond is through emotional rejection —but it has to be real. the host has to willingly sever the tie. anything else just strengthens it."
your hands shake, jungwon didn't choose this. he wasn't born like this, he was consumed. maybe still is. you think of the way he touches you now—like he's entitled to it. like your body is a ritual, not a person. you think of waking up with his mouth already between your thighs, his eyes glassy with need, saying: "you're the only thing that keeps me human."
you think of how your skin feels like it doesn't belong to you anymore. you snap the journal shut. and then—"baby?"
you freeze, his voice is sleepy. rough. too close. you turn and see that he's standing in the doorway, shirtless, rubbing his eyes. there's a red imprint on his cheek from your pillow.
"why're you up?" he murmurs. "bed's cold." you grip the notebook behind your back. "i couldn't sleep." he steps closer, you keep your expression neutral. "i missed you," he says, gaze soft but unreadable. "come back." you smile, it's fake, but it's practiced.
"yeah. okay." he kisses your temple and leads you back to bed. he wraps himself around you like he never plans to let go. and you think: he won't. you clutch the journal tighter, you have a weapon now. you just don't know how to use it yet.
"what were you doing in the kitchen last night?" you freeze mid-pour, the sound of tea spilling into your mug suddenly too loud. jungwon's voice is quiet—not soft, not this time. it lingers in the doorway like smoke, head tilted just slightly, that permanent kind expression resting too gently on his face.
you don't look up, "i thought i heard something," you answer. "like... rattling. maybe the wind." you pray he buys it. jungwon hums, the sound low, almost thoughtful. he moves to stand behind you, arms sliding around your waist, cheek resting against your temple. you're not comforted. "funny," he murmurs. "i didn't hear anything."
"you were sleeping," you try to brush off. "i always hear you." you tense, barely—but he catches it. "you're lying to me, aren't you?" your heart stutters, you try to laugh, force a small smile. "seriously? i got a glass of water." he pulls back just enough to meet your eyes. there's something flat in his stare now, calculating.
"didn't i tell you before?" he whispers. "if there's anything bothering you, you can tell me. i'll take care of it." you just smile softly, "i'm fine." he doesn't look convinced, his brows furrowed, "hm." he lets you go, but his gaze lingers.
you're more careful now. you return the notebook the next morning when he goes out to the market —nestling it back behind the false panel, just as you found it. you wipe the edges of the bookshelf, brush your hair. smile when he returns, arms full of fresh fruit and tofu and the cheap little candies you once told him you liked.
"you remembered," you say, voice light. "of course i did." that afternoon, you read in the sunlit living room while he showers. you turn a page, eyes scanning the text—but your mind is somewhere else entirely.
he didn't believe you, you know it and worse—you saw him change. not visibly. not all at once. but the way his fingers twitched against your wrist, as if resisting the urge to tighten. the way his smile didn't quite reach his eyes when you lied to him. the way he kissed your neck that morning, slower than usual, lingering like a warning.
he's spiralling, and so are you.
later that night, you pretend to sleep. jungwon moves around the apartment in near-silence. you feel him pause by the bookshelf. hear the low creak of wood shifting. the telltale scrape of the false panel opening. you keep your breathing steady, shallow. you wait, your heart beating in anticipation.
there's a long pause, then the soft thump of the panel sliding closed. a few heartbeats later, he climbs into bed beside you. his arms wrap around your middle again. same as always.
but his grip? it's just a little tighter now.
⛧⃝
the day feels too normal.
jungwon makes you breakfast again—eggs over rice, scallions chopped thin, pickled radish on the side just how you like it. you catch him watching you between bites, but when you look up, he only smiles. "you're quiet today," he says. "so are you."
he frowns at your retort, "but you're the one i worry about." you don't answer but your throat feels thick, tight with the weight of what you know. that notebook, those pages and the truth of what's inside him—what's maybe controlling him, even if he thinks it's love.
he cups your cheek gently and brushes your lower lip with his thumb. "you've been sleeping better, right?" you nod, because that's what he wants. his smile softens, "good. you deserve to rest." he clears the table, washes the dishes without a word. there's something so human about it—the way his shoulders hunch, the way his sleeves get wet. he even hums a little, under his breath, some tune you don't recognize.
and for a second, you forget. for a second, you almost let yourself believe this is what it looks like. normal. safe.
it's hours later when he comes to you. you're curled on the futon, eyes half-lidded from the heat, body loose with stillness. jungwon slides down beside you wordlessly, head resting on your thigh. his fingers graze the bare skin above your knee. "do you remember," he murmurs, "the first time i saw you?" you swallow, "yeah."
"you smiled at me," he looks up at you now, chin resting on your leg, gaze dark. "you were so soft. so kind. even when everyone else was screaming." he traces a slow line down your calf. not threatening, not yet. "i thought maybe you were sent to save me." you laugh, but it's empty, "i'm not the saving type."
"no," he whispers. "you're not." he shifts up slowly—arms bracing on either side of you, eyes searching your face. he looks so gentle, too gentle. "but you're mine." his kiss is quiet at first—feather-light, pressing to your cheek, the corner of your mouth, your throat. then deeper, hungrier.  his hands are slow, reverent, brushing beneath your shirt like he's asking even though you both know he won't stop if you say no.
"let me take care of you tonight," he breathes. "just... let me do this." you don't say yes but you don't say no. you don't stop him when he pushes your thighs apart. don't flinch when he kisses down your stomach, mouthing against the soft skin just above your core like it's holy. like it's his last prayer. "i just want to taste you again," he whispers. "just this. nothing else."
his hands tug down your pajamas, his eyes glassy as he admires your soft skin and the panties the he had bought you. his fingers grace the lacey fabric softly making you shiver, seeing your reaction—he smirks. he pulls down the thin fabric next, his pupils dilating before he's jutting his tongue out to wet his lips.
he's careful, at first. tongue slow, touch restrained. one hand anchored against your inner thigh, the other curled tight in the blanket as if he's holding himself back from something darker. your breath catches and your hips twitch.
his tongue glides down your slit, gathering your slick before swirling it around your clit. you shudder when you feel him blow softly against your sensitive bud, your stomach tightening at a dangerous rate.  "there you go," he murmurs, mouth warm against you. "that's it. that's my good girl."
he doesn't ask for anything in return, but you feel it—how close he is to needing more. how the restraint is slipping, how his fingers keep flexing, like he's debating whether to grab your wrists. to pin you open. to make you beg.
you cum. but he keeps going like he wants to pull another one out of you with devotion alone. and when he finally stops—lips slick and eyes glassy, he kisses the inside of your thigh, then crawls back up to hold you close. "you belong here," he whispers against your hair. "with me." you say nothing, you don't move.
your skin still tingles. but inside your mind, all you can hear is the notebook's warning: "it devours. it possesses. it feasts on obsession—especially the kind that pretends to be love."
he's softer the next morning, arms wrapped around your waist, cheek pressed between your shoulder blades, breathing steady. you pretend to be asleep. you've gotten good at that. he shifts slightly, you feel the faintest press of his lips against your back. "you were so good for me last night," he whispers, barely audible. "you let me love you."
and just like that, your stomach knots. you sit with it for hours. the notebook's words echo over and over, carved into your thoughts like scripture. "the chainsaw doesn't just destroy devils. it becomes what it's fed."
"it hungers for love. for ownership. for submission."
"feed it the illusion. let it believe you belong to it. and when it's full... strike."
your hands shake as you pour the tea, he kisses your temple and doesn't notice.
it starts that night. you wait until he's tucked into you again, his body curled around yours like armor. "jungwon," you say quietly, he freezes—just for a second. he always does when you speak first, "hm?"
"you want me, right?" and his breath stutters. "don't ask stupid questions," he says. "you know i do." you pause, "then show me."
he's still, "you're not just saying that?" he asks carefully, eyes locked onto yours. "you're not trying to trick me?" you smile—soft, sweet, practiced. "i want to be yours." and that's all it takes.
his hands tremble at first. not with nerves but with restraint. he touches you like he's still afraid you'll disappear if he pushes too fast. but you open for him willingly, wrap your arms around his neck. kiss him with something close to hunger.
he swears softly, "you're finally mine," he murmurs, voice wrecked. "you're finally letting me—" you pull him in and silence him with your lips. his pants are half-off before he even realizes you've taken control of the pace—the kiss deepening, your legs parting, hips rising to meet him.
"slow," you whisper. "go slow." one hand wraps around your throat while the other reaches down to push down his boxers, his girth slapping his stomach—painfully hard.
you let him help you shimmy of your pants and panties in one go, his fingers tracing over you but you stop him. "no, i want it in me. please wonnie."
jungwon swore he could cum right there in that moment, he pushes in like he's savoring every inch—breath ragged, one hand cradling your face, the other gripping your waist like he'll break you if he holds any tighter. "fuck," he whispers. "you feel like... you were made for me."
you make a soft noise in response—the kind that makes him kiss your throat, your shoulder, your chest. desperate little worships between thrusts. his rhythm never falters. deep, deliberate. devotional. you moan for him, just enough. his eyes flutter shut and he doesn't realize that you're watching him.
doesn't realize that you're memorizing every weak spot. every place his mind drifts too far into the illusion—where he forgets to guard himself. where his heart starts to override his instincts. he doesn't realize this is the first time you've truly felt powerful since he pulled you into his world.
and it's not power in the way he wants it, it's yours.
jungwon's moaning into your ear, his thrusts getting impossibly deeper as he speaks gibberish. "s-so close, let me cum inside," he whines. you feel your throat tighten, you want to say no. "okay—okay. cum inside me, wonnie. m'wanna feel you." you could feel jungwon twitch at your words, "m'gonna fill you up. g-gonna make you swell with my kids," he hisses softly before he falls apart.
you shudder when he finishes, you feel full. his cum thick and warm, coating your insides perfectly. after, he wraps you in his arms like you're something sacred. he breathes against your temple, murmuring things you don't care to hold onto.
his cock is still soft inside you, his heartbeat is loud and his mind is quiet. for once, you stare at the ceiling and you begin to plan.
he hums while brushing your hair, it's barely morning. the sun filters through the curtains in narrow strips of gold, and you're seated in his lap, head tipped forward while he runs a comb through your hair like it's the most sacred task in the world.
"you were so good last night," he says. "i've never felt that close to anyone before." you don't respond, you don't need to. he's content to speak for both of you now. "i know it's different for you. i know you're still... adjusting. but i can feel it. i know you're starting to love me back."
you turn your head slightly, just enough for your cheek to brush against his shoulder. "i'm trying," you whisper, he kisses the top of your head. you've learned how to say what he wants to hear. when to touch him, when to flinch. everything is calculated now, the act has become second nature.
you start keeping track of his habits, what time he sleeps deepest. where he leaves his coat. how long his showers last. how sharp his chainsaw arm looks after he cleans it. you cook for him, you sit close. you let him take you apart with his mouth at night, even when you don't want to. especially when you don't want to. because the closer he thinks you are to surrender, the more careless he becomes.
"i love making you feel good," he mumbles one night, face buried between your legs. "i don't need anything else. i could stay here forever." and you stroke his hair like you believe him.
the notebook is tucked beneath your mattress, wrapped in one of his old shirts. hidden, but close. you flip through its pages when you're alone, studying the margins where someone—maybe someone like you—had scrawled desperate notes in tiny handwriting.
"don't resist too obviously. it confuses it."
"the chainsaw doesn't want a pet. it wants a partner. fake that."
"the moment it believes it's loved, it softens. that's when it can be hurt."
"but if you get it wrong—if it knows you're lying, it will never stop."
you read the last one twice, and then again.
he starts asking questions after a few days, "why were you up last night?" you blink at him over your tea, "i wasn't." he looks at you with an unreadable expression, "you were. i heard you in the kitchen." you feign confusion, "i thought i heard something outside. it was nothing."
he watches you for a moment too long, his hand finds yours, "you'd tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?" you squeeze back, "of course."
that night, you put the notebook back exactly where he left it. he checks in the morning and you hear the rustle of paper. the silence that follows, then his footsteps. "you moved it." you look up from the couch, play dumb. "what?"
"the book. it wasn't where i left it," your pulse quickens—but you don't let it show. "i bumped into the shelf while cleaning. maybe it fell." he doesn't speak, you can feel his eyes scanning you, hungry and suspicious all at once. then his shoulders relax. "you should be more careful," he murmurs. "some things shouldn't be touched."
you nod, you smile. and you tuck the warning away like another page in your survival manual. you read the book every moment you can. the cursed one—warped at the spine, its pages always warm, like flesh. it calls to you, louder than jungwon's voice, more constant than his touch. it tells you things he never did. things you were never supposed to know. how the devil inside him, the chainsaw—isn't a parasite. it's a pact, a bond sealed in blood and want. and like all devils, it feeds off something.
not just fear. not just violence but obsession, love. and then, you find the rule. to summon the chainsaw devil, to separate it from the host—he must truly believe you love him. your breath catches and you understand. you can't fight him physically, you can't outrun him you can't outsmart him—not forever. but if you can trick the devil, if you can make jungwon believe he's won—you might get one chance. one moment to call it by name, to break the bond, to be free.
so you act.
you hold his hand when he offers it, you smile when he kisses you. you let him touch. let him whisper things in your ear like "you're the only thing keeping me sane." you play the part. when he brings you breakfast in bed—eggs shaped like hearts, toast carved with your initials —you giggle. when he curls around you in the middle of the night, you kiss his forehead and whisper i love you into his hair. he believes it, he has to.
every time you press your lips to his skin, you taste iron. the chainsaw inside him purrs, satisfied.
it takes weeks, weeks of laying beside him while bile rises in your throat. weeks of burying the nightmares, of faking softness, of giving him everything he wants just short of your soul. he gets softer, relaxed and his guard slips. his need to control you shifts into smugness—the way he watches you fold laundry like a housewife, the way he smirks when you crawl into his lap with big, empty eyes.
he thinks he's won and that's when you start preparing. because you've done your part. and soon—the devil will do his. you don't sleep anymore, not really. even when your body gives in—even when the sheets are warm and jungwon's arms are around you, breath steady against your neck, you never sink. you float, tethered to the ceiling, watching yourself from above. waiting.
waiting for him to crack, waiting for yourself to. so when he leaves for supplies, humming under his breath, you don't hesitate. you kneel in the center of the living room, floorboards creaking under your weight, and whisper the name that's been echoing in the back of your mind ever since that night.
"chainsaw man."
the lights flicker, then die. the room goes dark. too dark. a thick, suffocating black that swallows everything whole. and then it answers, it looks like jungwon at first. same face, same build, same sweet voice.
"you called me?" but the eyes are wrong, too wide, too still. no breath fogs the air around its mouth. its smile is too sharp—the kind that feels carved in. you swallow, "you're not him."
"i'm not. but i wear him well, don't i?" its voice warps mid-sentence, glitching, like too many mouths are speaking at once. it moves closer. "you've seen pieces of me. the things that wake you up at night. the parts of him that don't feel quite human." you stand your ground, "what are you?"it grins, "obsession. hunger. need. he made a deal and i made him whole."
"and the cost?" your voice trembles. "you," the word lands like a slap. "he didn't know it then," the devil adds, tilting its head. "but the moment he wanted you more than he wanted freedom, i had him." you feel sick, but you force the question out. "what if i give myself up instead?" silence, then the smile fades. "you're offering yourself... in his place?" you nod once, "take back what's yours. let him go. i'll give you everything."
the devil steps forward—slow, graceful. almost reverent. "tempting," it murmurs. "but he won't let go. not now. not ever." your head spins, "i'll convince him."
"you're welcome to try."
and then the door slams open, "what the fuck are you doing?" you turn, he's in the doorway, fists clenched, chest rising fast. his bag drops to the floor. his eyes are wide, and then they change. iris to ember, white to blood. and his arm—his arm rips open, bones cracking, metal grinding as the blade splits through his flesh, unfurling like a jagged bloom.
"you were going to give yourself to it?" the chainsaw roars to life and the floor trembles beneath your feet. "after everything? after me? after what we've shared?" you step backc "jungwon—" he cuts you off immediately, like his name out of your mouth burned him. "don't call me that," he snaps. "don't fucking pretend you still get to say my name."
the devil, still behind you—watches silently. amused. "i pitied you," you whisper. "i tried to love you. i tried to believe this was something real. but you turned it into a cage." he freezes and for the first time, he doesn't speak. his face crumbles, eyes too bright. blood trickling down his arm where the chainsaw roots into his shoulder, still whirring like it's hungry.
"you never loved me," he says, not a question—not even angry. just broken, "you lied." and the bond—the one you never agreed to, the one that kept your mouth shut and your hands folded, splinters. the devil behind you exhales and the air sharpens.
jungwon takes a step forward, you don't run. the chainsaw devil lingers in the room like a sickness—sprawled in the corner, grinning wide, eyes glowing red as it watches everything unfold like a stage play made just for him. jungwon is on his knees in front of you. blood smeared across his arms, jaw trembling, mouth moving faster than his mind can keep up.
"you love me," he whispers. "you do. you just... you forgot for a second. but it's okay, i can remind you—i can make you feel it again." you don't answer, you can't. the silence stretches and the devil laughs from the corner. a low, guttural sound like rusted machinery trying to breathe.
"oh, poor little dog," it drawls. "still begging." jungwon's head jerks toward it—chainsaw arm twitching, sparking but then he turns back to you, softer again. desperate. "don't listen to it," he pleads. "you know it's lying. you know we're real. all those nights, everything we shared... that was real, right?"
you swallow, your lips part but nothing comes out. and in that moment, he knows. his eyes darken, jaw clenching so hard you hear his teeth grind. he stands slowly, the weight of the truth sinking into his bones. "you used me," he says, voice flat. then again, louder—uglier. "you fucking used me." behind him, the chainsaw devil laughs louder, almost delighted.
"she played you like a goddamn fiddle," it says. "and you sang." the floor cracks beneath jungwon's feet as the air shifts. the chainsaw on his arm roars to life, screaming into the walls, sparks flying like a storm. his other hand slams into the wall beside your head, pinning you there —his face inches from yours, twisted in betrayal.
"was any of it real?" he growls. "did you even feel anything when i touched you? when i begged for you?" his voice breaks, but his grip doesn't and the devil leans forward, licking its lips. "this is my favorite part," it murmurs.
"you made me think we were in love," jungwon spits. "you made me believe it. you—" he drags the saw across the floor, leaving a deep gash in the wood. "you ruined everything." you flinch, breath shaking. your back hits the wall harder as he cages you in with his body. the heat of the saw burns close to your thigh, but he doesn't press it —not yet.
"say you love me," he snaps. "say it now. fix this. fix me." you stare at him and maybe he sees something in your eyes—not fear, not even hatred. just... exhaustion. you don't answer, you won't lie, not anymore.
he screams. loud, guttural, animal. the chainsaw slams into the doorframe beside you, sending chunks of it flying. and the devil? the devil just grins, red eyes gleaming like fire. "go on," it says. "show her what you really are." jungwon's breath shakes. his forehead presses against yours, and for a second, he's quiet again.
"we were supposed to be forever," he whispers. you don't move. you can't. and somewhere deep inside him, that final thread—the one holding him together, finally snaps. the chainsaw devil laughs like it's been waiting for this. it echoes through the room like a sickness, bouncing off the shattered windows, crawling up your spine like cold hands. smoke coils from the broken floorboards. blood seeps into the cracks. and in front of you, jungwon is no longer jungwon.
his chest rises and falls in jagged rhythm, chainsaw arm sputtering to life with a roar that shakes the walls. where his eyes used to hold tears, they now burn red-hot—not just glowing, but lit, like a furnace. his skin splits in places, veins pulsing black with whatever poison the devil's poured into him.
you don't see the boy who brought you breakfast in silence. you don't see the boy who begged for your love with a whisper. you see the devil's chosen vessel, "you lied to me," he snarls, voice cracking open. it's his voice, and something deeper. layered. possessed. "you fucking lied."
he steps forward and the air drops ten degrees. his saw-drenched arm whines as it revs again, teeth spinning like a threat, bright with heat. the tip grazes the ground, carving a line as he walks, sparks flying at your feet. behind him, the devil lounges lazily against the crumbling wall, watching like a cat with a caught bird. "ah," it says, almost purring, "my little host finally wakes up."
"shut up," jungwon growls without turning. he's trembling—not from weakness, but barely-contained rage. grief. betrayal. "i gave you everything," he says, jaw clenched so tight you hear it crack. "i gave you every part of me. i made you mine. i—" his voice breaks and his hand slams into the wall beside your head again, harder this time. the plaster cracks.
you flinch but you don't cry, you don't beg. you just stare and that's what finally does it. something shifts behind his eyes—something that unravels the last thread holding him together.
he screams, the chainsaw arm explodes to full power, carving the wall beside your head in half. the devil laughs, delighted, as jungwon's body convulses, more rage than reason. his other hand finds your throat but he doesn't squeeze, not yet. just holds, like he's trying to feel if your pulse still stutters for him.
"say it," he chokes. "say you love me. say it now and i'll stop. i'll put it away. i'll let you go." your lips part but nothing comes out and that's when he really loses it. he screams, not your name. not even words anymore—just raw, furious noise, ripping out of him like a chain being yanked from a throat.
the chainsaw arm slams into the wall beside your head, this time carving clean through it. drywall bursts apart, smoke thick in the air, and the heat of the blade is close enough to burn. his body shakes with rage, teeth bared, eyes wet and bloodshot—but they never leave yours. like even now, even after everything, you're the only thing anchoring him to this plane.
"was it all fake?" he pants, voice shredded. "every kiss, every look—? you let me touch you. you let me love you." you try to speak, to move but he's too close. his hand presses to your chest, flat and rough, right above your heart—feeling it beat. too fast. too scared.
"you wanted me," he whispers. "i know you did. your body never lied." you flinch and the devil cackles, still hunched in the corner like a grotesque shadow. "love me," jungwon snarls. "love me, or i swear to god—" his voice breaks and something in his posture crumbles. his body jerks once, and the chainsaw sputters, stalling—teeth clicking uselessly mid-air like a dying thing.
you watch it, watch him. you don't say anything, not because you're scared. but because you're done, done with the fear, done pretending. and in that silence, the refusal—he knows. his knees buckle slightly, just a moment. like the weight of your indifference is heavier than any chainsaw could be. his hand drops from your chest, not out of mercy—out of loss. you see it in his face, that he knows he's already lost you.
"...i would've killed for you," he says, so quiet it's almost nothing. "i did." the devil stirs, its head tilts, grin sharpening. "don't be shy now," it purrs, eyes glowing hotter. "she's right there. and you've already ruined her, haven't you?" jungwon turns to it, slowly. his eyes hollow. you barely catch the movement before it happens—a shudder that starts in his spine, rippling outward like static and the chainsaw flares back to life, screaming.
he's not even looking at you anymore, just the devil. "get out," he says, voice shaking and the devil blinks, confused. "...what?" jungwon's arm snaps—blade pointed directly at it, trembling, firelight dancing off blood-soaked teeth. "get out of me." the devil snarls. "you ungrateful little—" but it doesn't finish. because you say it again—quiet, deliberate: "jungwon."
his head jerks, your voice cuts cleaner than the chainsaw ever could and something shifts. the light in his eyes flickers, behind him, the devil stares at you. like it knows, like it feels the bond fracturing. the room begins to shake, you don't stop. "you're not it," you whisper. "you're you. come back." for a second, one impossible second—the chainsaw dies down again. but this time, the devil screams. a sound so loud it cracks the walls.
and suddenly, jungwon is shaking—teeth clenched, hand twisted in his own hair, the saw jerking erratically as the devil fights to keep hold. his body writhes in place, caught between two fires. and you know, this is it. either he wins, or the devil does. your voice cracks as you say it again, stepping forward even though your knees nearly give.
"jungwon. come back to me."
he looks at you—and this time, he chooses. his eyes meet yours. for once, there's no bloodlust behind them. no rage. no hunger. just jungwon and for a moment—he's back. his mouth parts like he wants to say something but the chainsaw devil inside him roars instead. the scream tears through his throat, shaking the whole room. he drops to his knees like he's being pulled down by something inside him, clawing at his chest, his arm, like he's trying to rip it out. sparks spit from the chainsaw—it jerks wildly, carving into the floor, the walls, the air.
and behind him, the devil stumbles backward. eyes wide, furious. "don't you dare—" it snarls, smoke curling from its mouth. it tries to surge forward, but it can't. it's tethered to him, chained through him. and you? you're breaking that chain.
you step toward jungwon slowly and kneel beside him. he's still trembling, gasping like his lungs are full of ash, blood dripping from his nose, his mouth, his fingertips—but he looks at you like you're the only thing keeping him here. his hand twitches toward yours, desperate, scared, small. "don't let it take me," he breathes. "please." your throat closes up and you touch his face, gently. his skin is burning hot, too hot. like something inside him is boiling over but he leans into your hand.
and you say the only thing you can, "then let go." he shakes his head—violently, panicked. "i can't— it'll kill me—" "it'll kill everything," you whisper. "me. you. what's left of you. is that what you want?" his breath catches, he looks at you like you've stabbed him and maybe you have. his lips part. "...no." and then with a shudder that cracks the floor beneath him—he lets go.
his body seizes once, twice, and the chainsaw arm explodes in a burst of steam and fire. the room lights up like a furnace, heat licking the walls, and the scream the devil lets out isn't human. it's a beast dying slowly, violently—its voice splitting like a dozen rusted engines tearing apart at once.
"no—" it wails. "you need me—!" jungwon doesn't answer he just closes his eyes and breathes. behind him, the chainsaw devil cracks, splits down the middle like a mirror hit with a hammer. its body tears itself open from the inside, light and ash spilling out like a dying sun. and in the silence that follows—it's gone. you watch silently, your body numb.
the room goes still and jungwon slumps forward into your arms. burned. broken. bleeding. but human. you hold him for a long time, long enough for his breath to slow. his eyes flutter open just once and he whispers your name like he's saying sorry.
you don't speak, you just hold him tighter until he falls asleep.
you leave the next morning, quietly—carefully.
you don't look back, and on your way out as the door shuts behind you—you don't see it: the faint glint in the cracked floorboards. a single, jagged chainsaw tooth, left behind.
still warm, still waiting.
⛧⃝
you find him months later. no one talks about what happened, the city forgets quickly—blood fades, bodies rot, buildings fall and no one remembers the screams.
but you do, you always will.
he's not dead, you knew he wouldn't be. he's somewhere out past the edge of the city—where the devils don't go, where the silence hums louder than anything else. an old shack with no doors, just shadows. no lights, just him.
you step inside, heart in your throat. he's waiting, sitting on the floor like he never left it. legs pulled up, arms resting loosely over his knees. his head tilts when he sees you, "you came back," he murmurs. not a question, not surprised—but like he always knew.
you don't answer, he looks the same but dimmer. like the light was cut off from inside with only traces of red burn behind his eyes now, smoldering like coals. quiet. patient. lethal.
"i thought you hated me," he says. "i did," you say back, your eyes searching his.  "still do?" you hesitate, and that's enough. he smiles, slow and sharp. "it's okay," he says softly. "you don't have to lie. you were always good at pretending." you take a step back but he doesn't move. just watches you—like a predator that already knows you're too tired to run.
"did you really think it'd be over?" he asks, head tilting again. "that killing the devil would kill me too?" his voice is calm, but the air vibrates around it. something unnatural, something wrong.
"you played the game," he says, eyes narrowing. "but you forgot the rule." your breath catches and his grin grows wider. "you don't kill a devil with love," he leans forward. "you feed it."
your fingers twitch, the old instinct to run kicking in too late. he stands—slow, deliberate and walks until he's close, too close.
and then he whispers, right into your ear: "you're never escaping chainsaw man's clutches."
your blood runs cold, behind him, in the shadows, you swear you see something twitch. teeth. blades. smoke curling like fingers reaching out again.
and still, he smiles—because he knows. because he's still in there.
because you let him in—and now he's never letting go.
— enjoy this fic? check out my other ones right here!
512 notes · View notes