jcdamc

[jcdamc]

Nothing seems Sacred Anymore, Everything is Business

Some people assume that depression is simply a winter thing, a seasonal thing, or just a mental breakdown that is magically cured with pills. As a disabled brown man that lives with depression as well, I have discovered with time that depression is a spiritual thing. 

Depression is Not a stereotype or an illness as deemed by the patriarchal medical model of disability and health, it is the product of many social factors: isolation, lack of consistent physical affection in an individual’s personal life, self- withdrawal, anger towards self and others, self- deprecating behaviors, and an unsavory amount of guilt (most of which people cannot control), etc. 

Depression is as spiritual as much as it is environmental. It can also become a choice by which many folks hold themselves accountable for their lessons or mistakes. In other words, how some folks deal with their KARMA. 

I’m old enough to know better and young enough to know that I still have more time in our device infested world. I find little to no joy in routine, although I need structure. I find little to no joy in using Zoom for any aspect of my current life, yet I need it to survive and “connect” on a certain level. I find little to no joy in going to the grocery store, where everyone wears a damn mask and where most folks confirm that they are selfish even in the pandemic, but I need food and toiletries. Most of all, I have NO desire to be sucked into anyone else’s energy or feelings anymore. 

The more I have attempted to fit into the imposed cocoon of social norms that I was born into, the more I have shot myself in the foot...

Comparison and harsh capitalism are the real devil indeed. 

The only way to face these things is to face my self every single day, and know that I was put here to do the right thing for myself. Don’t get me wrong, I am eternally blessed for my blessings, supportive networks and families. However, as dreadful as routines are for me, I need to find discipline to follow through, to achieve my very personal and sacred life goals, life goals that will lead me to be fully liberated from my love affair with pain and suffering. 

A few lessons that I wanted to humbly and honestly share:

1. I just want to do the right thing for me, I want to live beyond survival, and that does not make me an inspiration. I am more than (self- imposed) labels. 

2. Trust your intuition. Don’t be afraid of healthier boundaries. Sometimes people have to distance themselves from others to not hurt them, and mainly to protect oneself from self- harm (in any form) as well. 

3. Self- affirmations, be it Confidence, Swagger, Beauty, Worth, Compassion and Love need to become unconditional. However, they take some Time. 

4. Spiritual and physical connections go hand in hand when building deep intimate relationships. That’s the sexy connection and COMPANIONSHIP that I want to feel again. 

5. Conventional ideas of marriage are arbitrary and at times oppressive to any gender identity. “Marriage” as it stands today and for about 100 plus years, is a financial/ business agreement or contract to me. Point blank. What’s Love Got to Do with It??!!

6. Private Life matters. Oversharing intimate, sensitive or private details of your life online is a choice, yet it also shows a lack of healthy boundaries and it can harm people’s emotional health. Just because your “friends” do it doesn’t mean you have to do it. Social media giants and peer pressure make me sick to my soul, literally and figuratively. 

7. A phone call means 1000x more to me than a damn “Facetime.” Chatting ain’t the same as conversing... 

8. I’m an old soul with some new school ways, a hopeless romantic that is fully aware that Love is a beautiful (spiritual) struggle, Not a fairytale. 

9. It’s important to know how the enemy works. You must learn from your enemy while you are simultaneously learning about Your SELF. 

10. It’s okay to not be okay. Don’t worry, not everyone will judge you. Be kinder to your journey. 

11. Dreams, god(desses)s, angels and prayers send key messages. Through your resistance and stubbornness, be sure to write them down. 

12. Believe that you ALL DAT! You are loved and protected even in the worst of nightmares, AND are Doable like art!

One step at a time towards Change and Freedom and letting go...

That’s that piece. Peace, Blessings, Love and Healing to y’all.

- JC Da MC 

[jcdamc]

Self- compassion and self- love is a lifelong healing PROCESS, particularly as a disabled, brown, product of exile, culturally mixed, unconventional city man. Then again, one day I will wake up without labelling myself and know that I am simply lovable indeed. I have to practice this every day, most of the time in extreme spiritual solitude, yet remembering gratitude. 

You should apologize when you mistreat yourself. If you call yourself names you’d never call somebody else or get mad at yourself for shit you don’t care about other people doing, you should say sorry afterwards. If you call yourself an idiot when you make a mistake or tell yourself that you’re worthless when you’re lonely you should literally be sitting with yourself and saying “I’m sorry, you are not an idiot, you do not deserve to be called an idiot” or “What I said wasn’t okay. People do love you. I’m so sorry.” It’s the same with any other apology, it won’t undo it. But you’d be practicing acknowledging that you deserve better. You’d be practicing hearing that you don’t deserve to be treated like that. You’d be practicing treating yourself with the decency you already show to other people. 

[jcdamc]

How can people be social and intimate with themselves and others during this pandemic and technocracy era??! And without (much or any) physical contact??!

I’m really curious to hear what other folks have been doing? I live alone, I’m blessed to be more stable and I’m single, which is dope in some ways. In other ways, it’s not. I take things one day at a time and try to remember my blessings in the midst of my own emotional chaos.

Other than typical things like meditation or getting a migraine on Zoom “calls” tryna connect, or making actual phones calls, what other things have some folks been doing or promoting to connect intimately with loved ones or tribes or a particular interest on a more personal level? 

SOME SOLUTIONS:

1. Visual Art Therapy and engaging with my musical, written and spoken word creativity roots is one way I’m continuing to heal and reconnect.

2. Leaving the codependent toxic ass social media (FB, IG) “Matrix” alone for a while...

Please share your thoughts or suggestions!!

Thank you all. 

Peace!

JC Da MC

[jcdamc]

Rodstarz- Like Joe

THIS HERE! Speak on it, fam!

[jcdamc]

GROWTH MOMENT: Brown men and disability awareness stories

Last night two young "Christian" men preaching about healing and judgement day on my way home said to me verbatim: "We saw you walking and noticed it's something wrong with your legs. What's wrong with "them"? And what’s your name? 

ME: Hey, how y'all doing? I’m Jay. 

Two young men responded: You know, God will "heal" you, and you'll be "cured." You know Judgement Day coming too, right??! 

ME: Oh. Naw there's nothing wrong with me. I'm disabled and I am just FINE as I am. I don’t need a “cure.” 

Also ME: Yes and I am preparing for Judgment Day...

THEM: Do you Believe in God?

ME: Yes. I'm quite spiritual, not religious, and God loves me just the way I am.

THEM: .... Shared a few born- again stories...

ME (listening) as the bus pulled up: Sorry fellas, but I really gotta catch this bus. Nice talking to y'all. God Bless. 

I held my ground without lashing out, despite the blatant ableism that is still rampant within various churches and from so- called believers. I guess I am coming along. 

NOTE for my beautiful black and brown disabled advocates, churchgoers and close friends: Please do me a favor and tell these "evangelizing" FOOLS we ain't looking for no cure, and that disabled folks ARE HUMANS that fight to live in peace and with more love and justice! Some folks just don't know SWAG when they see it! Much Love. J.

[jcdamc]

MOOD: Users and Abusers (New Late Summer Piece 2020)

Part of my Summer Uncut/ Poetic Justice Series:

Users and Abusers

I’m so pissed that my mind reeks of urine

my teeth stay chewin’ my little bits of hope

ragin’ against the machine

hidin’ behind infected screens

beautiful vixens turnt into material fiends

depression and sleep creating knee-deep psychotic dreams. 

Nobody likes the smell of wet pages anymore

everybody want quick bright lights and glory,

most sheep don’t sweat to be free.

This damn world is for the few that are tall, 

while the short ones gettin all gassed up maskin’ their whole lives for change. 

Users...

I used to like her and her

Abusers... 

I used to like ‘em

Users...

Money hungry hoes

no matter the gender

just bend her

just eye him

play with all of ‘em

he a cute ass sucka

he’ll eventually give in

Motown singin’ 

No town, sayin’ gimme some mo’ 

no pant wearin’ clowns

The city of Angels and Demons

of bloody shoulders.

The city I love so much...

is run by users and abusers

from them bureaucrats, Bushes, 

to dope Trapped boys

enslaved hood hustlers

and baby mamas and daddys that hate they lovers,

yet are in lust with their genitalia.

After the thousandth time,

they STAY ready to fail you...

and you swear you gone fix that cassette tape with your magic pen??!

Lookin’ for real women and men??! Cut the bullshit. Some of y’all stay 

fuckin’ with Felicias and baby Jodies,

and are terrified of making love to Truth and Honesty!!

That’s that piece, y’all. JC Da MC 

[jcdamc]

No introduction needed....

Source: YouTube

[jcdamc]

Ari Lennox- Bussit (2020)

Wow!! B.E.A.U.T.Y. FULL.

Just admire these queens.... 

Sigh.... this single life is real and it sucks. Period.  

I’m an old SOUL and will not apologize for that. 2020 can kiss my fine brown ass. 

One day at a time. Ari’s vibes and her tribe give me a glimpse of hope with my future intimate relationship(s) as a healing man.

[jcdamc]

Online Dating is....

Like “shopping” in a Purgatory Mall even when you are TRUE TO YOURSELF as a person.

WOW.... PAST DONE. 

THE END. 

[jcdamc]

On a Creative Binge!!

Quarantining has helped me increase my reading again. More importantly, this crude reality that we all live in has pushed my spiritual loneliness, at times reckless anger, and despair into my original baby, POETRY AND SPOKEN WORD ART.

A couple of series of new poetic material are almost ready, and they will be shared sooner than later.

Peace and Blessings, everybody. Oh and spirits are meant to be free and love other spirits...

- JC Da MC

[jcdamc]

This is for colonizers, Columbustas and “Hispanics” that have been in denial, lied for centuries and claimed that there were no black folks, no afro- descendants in Mexico. The young lady in the beginning of the video is simply gorgeous, God’s creation. 

The African Diaspora is everywhere and it is entrenched in the world’s cultures whether people feel uncomfortable, or whether naysayers like it or not. The people’s history don’t lie, while those colonial history book writers who tell it DO, more often that not. 

On top of that, Vicente Guerrero was one of the main Afro- Mexican leaders that liberated Mexico from Spaniard colonization

Real historical struggles can never be fully erased. 

Re- learn, re-educate yourselves and know your ethnic backgrounds even if it takes you the rest of your lives. We must all go through this process of decolonization to be free from mental slavery. 

- JC Da MC

[jcdamc]

The Coup- The Guillotine

Funky and very relevant liberation message, no doubt. 

MOOD. People power all day. Liberation all day. Independent communities all day, Fuck presidents all day. Fuck oppression all day. One struggle, one life mission. 

“We got the guillotine, we got the guillotine, you better run...” 

[jcdamc]

Tef Poe and Rebel Diaz- Ghetto Pueblo

From their dope collaborative EP MULTIPLY

MOOD: “Middle finger yo’ opinion, we don’t need no m***fn feedback!...”

[jcdamc]

#Repost @blacksugar1494 ・・・ Did you know… ————————————————— www.BlackandSugar.com #africa #latinamerica #blackhistory #photography #blacksugar ———————————————— #blackstudies #africandiaspora #slavery #brazil #cuba #ecuador #mexico #puertorico #dominicanrepublic #honduras #costarica #peru #argentina #nicaragua #colombia #panama #chile #uruguay #venezuela #paraguay #bolivia — view on Instagram https://ift.tt/2P5nDYk

[jcdamc]

Tanerélle- Mama Saturn

Discovering and learning about newish artists.

All I know is that, through it all, God’s love is real. Women, particularly sistas that are artists, are the greatest gift of God. I feel her spirit. 

Thank you. Peace and respect.

- JC Da MC

Source: Youtube

[jcdamc]

Grateful for healing candles and these Eleke necklaces that my spirit called to protect me as I rediscover my sense of prayer in troubling times. The Youruba/ santeria/ Caribbean religious, spiritual traditions are something that have appealed to me recently and strongly. May the Lord/ Highest help me help ME as I choose to get away from (my own) noise and things that do not serve my purpose. If it's not about healing, love, justice, liberating and uplifting I don't want it. #angels #protection #life #spirit #liberation #santeria #healing (at South Side, Chicago) https://www.instagram.com/p/CCHnc9Tne9I/?igshid=1fzfrhqp1ha0

[jcdamc]

I finally got my copy. I like sheets of paper... If people feel good, they feel free. I need to feel that again sooner than later. #pleasureactivism #adriennemariebrown #feelgood #free (at Chicago, Illinois) https://www.instagram.com/p/CCHo76xnf8v/?igshid=wkhayl8uopdy