jdthetransman

[jdthetransman]

Lord please help me

[jdthetransman]

I was doing well for a while. Everything is hitting again, and hard. I’m going to talk about everything on film for the first time. There’s a lot that has been bugging me and I rarely get a chance to express how I feel & things from my perspective. I swing back and fourth between if I’m good enough or not enough, if I matter or dnt matter and ultimately if I should live or not. My life has been faced with so many life changing decisions and opportunities that I still have yet to cope with. It almost feels like a biblical story. Sometimes instead of dying I feel like a should suffer and get my story out there so that other who relate to anything that I’ve gone or am going through. It could really help someone know that they aren’t alone. I truly feel alone. There’s no one that I can talk to that understands want I’ve gone through. I’ve come so far from what I was but I’m afraid. I’ve been on my own since 15 and have felt alone ever since. Yes I used to gangbang. Yes I used to sell and use drugs. Yes I used to add to the crime statistics in my hometown. I didn’t know who I was, all I ever knew was what the world wanted me to be. Now that I’ve found myself I still feel like I’m not completely myself. I feel like people need to know. All they see me as now is the “successful” Tv/Film Producer. I should be happy, I am, but I think it’s time to let people know how I became me.

[jdthetransman]

I need help…

[jdthetransman]

I get very angers for no reason sometimes

[jdthetransman]

I try to stay strong but even I have a tough time coping with depression. I was only ever nice to you… don’t understand why you have to be so mean to me

[jdthetransman]

[jdthetransman]

idk im just sick of struggling in a life i don’t even want to have

[jdthetransman]

[jdthetransman]

date someone who wants to grow with u

[jdthetransman]

[jdthetransman]

Fr fr

I’ve talked a lot about my pain, my feelings, my hurt. For the longest time it helped. A lot. But now as the years pass by, I realize how it doesn’t help. It makes people uncomfortable. They don’t know what to say. And then comes the part I hate the most. I feel disgust for having shared anything at all. I feel so much regret. I wish I could it take all of it back.

[jdthetransman]

& yes I bust my nut to her yesterday

[jdthetransman]

Yes. I’m all up In her DMs

[jdthetransman]

Planted my seed, time to water it n watch it grow

[jdthetransman]

Jus wanna be alone today fr

[jdthetransman]

i wish someone would could help me. but i’m a lost cause

[jdthetransman]

Good vibes only.

Feeling real fragile today