jem4water

[jem4water]

gay culture is trying to telepathically communicate to visibly gay people you see in public that you’re one of them

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am I doing this right

[jem4water]

The homosexual lifestyle is not destructive to the fabric of American society!

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@staff Not exactly the “welcome back to the app store” you were expecting huh

[jem4water]

“i don’t wanna die, i sometimes wish i’d never been born at all” remains the rawest fucking lyric in the history of music thanks freddie

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[jem4water]

What We Do In The Shadows (2014) dir. Taika Waititi and Jemaine Clement

[jem4water]

Again it disturbs me that people in their early twenties are ashamed of being virgins as though it should be normal and expected for middle schoolers and high schoolers to be fucking lile crazy particularly when those are the most vulnerable amd likely to be taken advantage of by adults. This world’s fixation with sex is disturbing

[jem4water]

When you go to your team leader for advice about how to address an issue, do exactly as they say down to the letter, then your big boss comes and says what you did was wrong and we’ll talk about it tomorrow. Feels bad, man.

[jem4water]

me stopping by to send my monthly text in the group chat before fucking off again

[jem4water]

At work today I turned around and saw a huge (50 cent-er!) spider between two 2.5 year old boys, crawling super fast towards one boy, and I flew at that kid. Yanked him away by his arm while commanding, “Don’t touch it, just move away!”, killed the spider, then turned back around to him absolutely bawling his eyes out, wouldn’t look at me. Apologising to a kid for hurting and scaring them makes you feel like shit, but we had a cuddle and a good laugh afterwards. He was also crying because he was scared of the spider. I’m not just a giant asshole.

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To Trudy from the Epileptic Society who I hung up on when my phone anxiety got the best of me: I’m so sorry, you sounded so nice and polite and I’m wracked with guilt that I just hung up. I didn’t know what to say. You did nothing wrong, Trudy!

[jem4water]

Two weeks sober. Also had a dream last night that I was wrecked emotionally and went and hid in a closet, lolll.

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[jem4water]

[jem4water]

10.14.17

[jem4water]

Corden | Meyers | Kimmel | Colbert | Conan