jenxbabes-blog

[jenxbabes-blog]

Every once in a while, something just touches you. Nothing you do, or say, can change it. It changes you forever. It reminds you of what your soul yearns for. We can get so caught up in life sometimes, in the pain, that we lose the very essence of ourselves. Life is not about what you haven't done but what you have done and who you have around you supporting you and making you feel love. Often, we misconstrue the true meaning of love and happiness. Our innate desire to be in love and to be happy blinds us to the truth. We cannot seek others to love us, we must seek to love ourselves. In turn, being completely you, someone will love you for that, unconditionally. I've been touched today, by something I never thought could, but I thank God for it because it brought me back from this vengeful person I was becoming into the woman I have always been. I cannot allow anyone to change me for the worse. I need to stop allowing people to affect my character. Thank you God for showing me this.

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How effin’ cute is it to have the person you love propose to you with something you love? Jesus this is perfect.

So my boyfriend did a thing.

My boyfriend of over 2 years sent me a game over skype. He said he wants to try and make Pokemon games since I play them so much. I opened it up and was super excited.

It seemed really well done and was super ready to start on my adventure!

He left a lot of cute notes and tips around town.

He remembered my favorite Kanto starter.<3

I was surprised it ran pretty well. I went on my journey and leveled up my Pokemon!

He showed me support and encouragement through a ton of NPC dialogue.

Then as im ending the game I come across this.

;u;

[jenxbabes-blog]

You deserve happiness and so much more <3

[jenxbabes-blog]

Fear

Fear is slowly taking a hold of me, gripping every inch of my soul. I am in a constant battle between letting things be and making things be. I am consistently finding myself confused, without words, unsure of which choice to make. I cannot eat, nothing goes down well. I am so eager to do things, I just do not which things to do. I do not know which journey to take. I am allowing fear to cloud my judgment and it is unclear how to stop this. I need clarity.

[jenxbabes-blog]

When I die, I want to be loved as much as Paul Walker is loved even after death

Jenn Pages

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Baby Boy

The struggle it’s been to get additional tests to see if you are alright has been one of the most frustrating experiences of my life. As I call every place in Miami and ask for their help, I continue to be turned down. Baby boy, I just want to make sure you are ok...Why is it that nobody seems to care about your health like I do? Why is nobody trying to help? 

You’re so fragile right now, and at any moment you can die, why is nobody fighting for you like I am, like you’re fighting for yourself. Such a strong baby boy. I need your strength because this frustration is tiring me. But I refuse to give up on you. You are my strength right now. You are my motivation. You have not even been born yet and you own my heart. You are my special nephew, and Tia is going to love you no matter how you come out. No matter what life God has planned for you, vegetable or not. I will dedicate my every waking moment to making you happy. 

I love you, baby boy.

Tia Jenn

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Digging in deep

I find myself digging into the deepest depths of my soul, finding hope, reason, to continue to fight. The only reasons I came up with were for everyone but me. Every reason is for someone else, someone’s goal, life, happiness, because evidently, it makes me happy. This persistent trait of selflessness is overwhelming. It beautiful doing things for others, but I need to do this for myself. I need to think of myself right now. I just don’t know how to. All my life, my very being, is dedicated to the happiness of others. Then, it came to me. This long road of growth I have been through this year, that’s why I continue. I have come so far, and I have stayed strong when the darkest days came. That only means that, what I am going through now, is nothing. I need to keep pushing, for me, for my growth. For the struggle I have been through, fighting to get to where I am. I am doing this for me. At the end of the day, when I sleep at night, all I have is me. Every one, one way or another, will hurt me and that’s ok. Nobody, including myself, is perfect. I just have to love myself enough to know that it is not my fault that someone did not appreciate what I offer. It is ok. Just got to keep it moving. So I dug deep today, and found a reason to continue, and the reason is me. 

Jenn Pages

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Being happy in incredibly hard moments shows character more than anything.

Jenn Pages

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This fire within me burns, always has. Since I can remember, I've always felt this need, this dire need to be the best. The need to exceed all expectations. The need to overwhelm myself, to never stop fighting, to show the world that you are enough. To inspire and be inspired. To see the absolute beauty and show people the beauty in being happy. I can do this. I can't let myself down even if I wanted to.

[jenxbabes-blog]

I have been in my feelings this Valentine's Day. It's been many years since I have been single on a Valentine's Day. It was not making me sad because I did not have anyone. At the end of the day, I prefer to not have someone if it was not the right one. But what made me sad or down was, as I looked back, the men in my past, all somehow found someone that they love. One of them in particular, found his love, his ever after. I was sad because I could not comprehend why I was not someone's ever after, why did I not make someone feel complete enough to love me unconditionally. Initially, I thought because I am too difficult to love. But my mind began to process all the information that I have acquired through the years and came to a simple conclusion. I do not settle, and as much as I may be "difficult" to love, I'm actually not. I just give more love so I want more love back. I know myself and my needs. I understand what I have to offer which in turn makes me not settle for anything less. So, yes I am single. But I am single because I know what I want, and what I deserve and I am not willing to settle for anything less than that. It is not my self esteem, or whatever else excuse people say. It's just because I am not dumb or blind. I know a relationship is not perfect, but I also understand what I can take and what I cannot. Next time someone tries to tell me I am too insecure, I will explain that they are wrong. I am secure and that is what causes me to be more picky, and less vulnerable to something less than real. 

[jenxbabes-blog]

My trip to New York was absolutely the best, not only because I had my ride or die @lizzle_23 there, but also for all my friends in NY that showed me the best fucking time ever. Thanks. @veneegram__ @lebanesejesus @kenstarrz @richyportastayfly you guys made my trip amazing. Now do you guys have an extra room because I'm moving. ✈️💕 #NewYorkCity

[jenxbabes-blog]

Sie

I lost myself when I was around you. At the time, I thought it was the alcohol that invaded my blood stream causing these highs. When I look back, the first day, I was not intoxicated, but yet the feelings of that high was the same both times. It was your presence that lifted me, that pierced the smile, the smile so genuine, such pure bliss. Nothing was coerced, it just worked, it just flowed. It just happened. Your touch, your hand, your lips were poison. Poison. Cupid poisoned me. 

This was clearly before I knew. Before I knew there were others. I knew I wasn't the only one that felt that way about him. His aura, it infected everyone around him, but it drew me in even more. No matter how many times I told myself to leave, I stayed. He was my kryptonite. He was the venom that began to slowly infect my soul, leading me to a slow death. Those sweet words he whispered to me, I knew were spoken to others. But the need for his love overlooked it. I ignored my intuition, ignored my mind, my vibes. I ignored myself, and dove in head first. No thought was put into the consequences because at the moment, I knew he felt the same. In a sick way, I convinced myself that he felt this for me. The same overwhelming power drew him to me as well. I'm still falling and that is what hurts the most. I just want to land already, brush my shoulders off, and keep it moving because, baby, you're poison. Sie sind Gift.

[jenxbabes-blog]

Happy wife, longer life ft @tonioskits // Tag your friends, your momma, and your abuela // Follow @tonioskits @tonioskits @tonioskits

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Ah, tumblr, we meet again in this dark deserted night. There are many thoughts running through my head that have hindered the ease of my sleep tonight. My heart is not filled with hurt this time, it's filled with love. Overflowing love that consumes me in every aspect of the word. But it's refreshing and enlightening. None of the negativity I have around me matters. It is simply irrelevant. This is truly living and I plan on continually living it freely, no regrets. Full of mistakes but with people that never judge and never stop loving me. This is for me, and only me. For the ones I love and love me in return. For all the pain and for all the love.

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[jenxbabes-blog]

When the ugly friend is too picky // Tag your friends! // #ig #comedy #funny

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There goes my chance! HAPPY TUESDAY!! 💕☺️