jesusincrocs

[jesusincrocs]

there was this guy at the pizza place and he was cleaning tables like fucking sonic

[jesusincrocs]

[jesusincrocs]

a baby can be born right now at 12:00, on a wednesday, august 24 in new jersey while another baby is also born in the exact same moment but they are born 9:00, on a tuesday, august 23 in california, these babies that are born at the same moment are technically because of time zones, a concept that we created ourselves, born “hours” apart even though really they are born at the same moment just not the same “time”, one will be considered older even though in actuality they are the same

[jesusincrocs]

[jesusincrocs]

[jesusincrocs]

He saw his chance and fucking took it - via http://ift.tt/2cgaiXK

[jesusincrocs]

Seductively lick the dentist’s fingers when they’re in your mouth

[jesusincrocs]

At this point the phrase “beating a dead horse” should be replaced with “beating a dead gorilla”

[jesusincrocs]

I’m too lazy to think of a fake post but everyone was clapping

[jesusincrocs]

[jesusincrocs]

[jesusincrocs]

Raptor… - via http://ift.tt/2cgeZka

[jesusincrocs]

[jesusincrocs]

I just did a meme :)

[jesusincrocs]

when you’re drunk and everything is hilarious