joankellyforever

[joankellyforever]

“Continue to share your heart with people even if it’s broken.”

— Amy Poehler

[joankellyforever]

“I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.”

— Olivia Wilde

[joankellyforever]

[joankellyforever]

[joankellyforever]

CHOOSE ONE

[joankellyforever]

[joankellyforever]

“If you hesitate between me and another person don’t choose me.”

— Unknown

[joankellyforever]

This life // Vampire Weekend

[joankellyforever]

[joankellyforever]

FUCK THIS SHIT IM GOING BACK TO MY MOM AND DAD!

[joankellyforever]

FULL OF SHIT

I was just so bottled up

When I got the chance to pour

I exploded

It was like a massacre

Everyone was screaming run from her

But I heard them whispering it anyway

Maybe not out loud

But in my head

And what I did instead

I smiled

I smiled can you believe it?

Go ahead and say it

I'm such a clown

Making everyone laugh meanwhile

I'm the one wearing the frown

I heard its boring when I'm not aroud

I bet its so quiet you can feel my tears hit the ground

Triggers!

Youre all triggering me!

Mirrors!

Its starting to look like youre all mirroring me!

DOES MY NAME LOOK LIKE SIMON TO YOU!?

O I get youre afraid of what I might do...

ARENT YOU?

ADMIT IT...

FORGET IT!

I QUIT

THIS PLACE IS FULL OF SHIT!

[joankellyforever]

I dont need your fucking sympathy!

[joankellyforever]

it was fun

until

it wasnt fun

[joankellyforever]

hate pain

I wake up and my body is dripping in sweat

I have nightmares as soon as I get out of bed

Memories, I can't forget

Dark thoughts in my head

They can't leave me alone

My mind is the demons home

It's like they love to catch Joan

when she's alone because that's when they can be the loudest

They turn my nightmares into dreams

and my dreams into nightmares

until I'm sleepwalking and I'm scared

But, Truth or dare. I'm gonna lie on the wild side

'Cause there's nobody to tell

of all the dark memories that keep me in hell

You think they will care?

And if they do? what can they do?

Take me back into time?

and love me before I had an undeveloped mind!

Nothing makes me happy anymore

Life just feels like a chore

I tried doctors, I even listened to pastors Pray

But this pain don't just go away

so... forgive me if I don't wanna fantasize about hate today

Maybe. we're all just actors here

And when the people go all you have left is your shadow

lights are out and now we're all drowning in darkness

You see, I'm scared to go to church

where they're practicing judgment but preaching forgiveness because reality can be a hell

Fantasies live in graveyards

Because they all make it look so easy

and I just wanna admit that it's been hard

So maybe if I'm honest with you, you can grow with me

because maybe everything you're dying to see

is everything I wanna live to be.

I wish I could just let loose and tell you everything

I wanna tell you everything that you think I am

could possibly be far from the truth

And instead I keep it bottled up inside

and I give up again

and I remind myself that I tried again

But you see, we can't keep letting the devil keep us trapped like this

We gotta push the devil back every time he try to lie to us like this

No more being slaves to Dark thoughts like this

We MUST fight for the love no matter the cost.

We take our bruises.

We take our lumps

We dust ourselves off

and we get back up

We're not gonna let the devil ruin another love.

We are all divine and from up above.

We fed the devil so much hate.

We can't let that be our fate.

yet we can't take it back

The hate...

the fear. It's all a trap.

Everything someone hates

someone else can love.

So let's demand a refund on anything that wasn't sent from up above. No more buying into the hate. No more buying into the lies.

This time we will do instead of saying I tried.

[joankellyforever]

[joankellyforever]

how i sleep knowing i almost got committed into an institution today

[joankellyforever]

“You will search for me in another person, I promise.”

— Unknown