jofdiamonds

[jofdiamonds]

A tavern on a cliff.

Like something out of a fairy tale.

The sun was disappearing behind the horizon as Aki and Alexander made their way inside, accompanied by a few other men of their crew that also found strong liquor to be the solution to aching muscles and long days spent at sea.

The place was well taken care of. A fire was burning – it was warm outside still, but something told Aki the nights could get chilly. A few patrons here and there, most of them with sour faces, drinking their troubles away; it was too early for anybody else to be there, but no doubt the place would be buzzing with activity in a few hours.

As such, the girl behind the counter had a bored expression. Brown, big eyes and red curly hair, like fire. A round face with full lips and pale skin. She was saying something to a man. Aki couldn’t see him very well, only his back and hair; the former, broad, the latter, curly and dark.

He approached the conversing couple. It was his official duty as the first mate to introduce the crew when the captain was not present, and his unofficial one to buy a first round for everyone present. For their hard work, as a way to keep their spirits high. Aki didn’t care. He was well aware he would get most of his money back later on, when they started getting too drunk to play cards properly and their bets turned riskier and perilous.

‘Good afternoon. I am…’

‘Here for a drink, I assume?’ The young woman cut him, raising her brows and muttering numbers under her breath. She was counting how many of them there were, and her dark eyes only returned back to Aki after doing so.

‘Exactly. My name’s…’

‘Thirsty for what, exactly? Beer, something stronger?’

‘Something stronger!’ A voice behind him, laughter at seeing a woman who was not even in her thirties so… commanding. A curious and strong personality, she had. Aki found himself smiling.

‘Something stronger, yes. We have spent days at sea.’

‘I can tell,’ she simply said, with a crooked smile, putting bottle after bottle at the counter, and tankards beside them. As she was busy doing so, Aki turned to Alexander, hoping to find amusement in his friend’s young features. Instead, Aki saw him looking wide eyed at the young woman, as if he had found a magical creature instead of a mischievous girl.

‘Forgive her, she’s always like this,’ the man who the bartender had been talking with had been the one to talk. He was handsome, with a strong nose and jaw, heavy-lidded eyes and tanned skin, probably as a result of days spent working under the sun. A fisherman, perhaps? He had callused hands, so whatever he did for a living, was certainly physical.

‘Oh, sir, don’t worry. You have a beautiful wife, and beautiful women are allowed to do this sort of thing,’ Aki replied, guessing their relationship… wrong, apparently, because both the man and the woman looked at each other and broke into laughter.

The man shook his head. ‘We are siblings. As if anyone could put up with Cass long enough to marry her.’

Aki didn’t know about that. One look at Alexander told him the young blond marine was more than willing to, at the very least, try.

In fact, as much as Aki would have liked to speak with his friend now that the ground was still beneath their feet and they could do so without being surrounded by at least five other men at all times, Alexander only had eyes for Cass. Words for Cass. He made her laugh a few times and he looked like the proudest person to ever have lived.

It wasn’t long until Hércules – that was the curly-haired man’s name – substituted his sister behind the bar, Cass leaving with Alexander somewhere else. Last Aki saw of any of them, their lips were already pressed together.

‘A rare occurrence. As I say, most people can’t put up with her.’ Hércules laughed, rolling his eyes at watching his sister disappear with a stranger. His tone was, however, earnest and affectionate. The man clearly had a lot of love for his sister.

‘Alexander is a patient man.’ Aki shrugged, also smiling. He could respect a man who loved his family. ‘I guess getting to know someone must be difficult around here. Most of them leave after a couple of days, I assume.’

‘Yeah, that, or the mermaids eat them.’

Aki tilted his head towards one shoulder and squinted his eyes, about to choke on his drink. The mermaids? Was Hércules teasing him? Was this some local running joke that Aki knew nothing about? No. The man was serious. Drying a tankard with a piece of fabric with an expression not different to that he would have had had he been talking about the weather.

‘Mermaids?’

‘Yes. Do you want to see them? They will come, if I ask.’

Aki thought about it for a second. Was this man going to take him to the beach and rob him? No, the tavern seemed to be doing well, these people did not need money. Then, what was it? Was this offer… real?

Aki nodded.

───⋆☆─────────────

Hércules hadn’t lied.

Aki wondered once more if someone hadn’t slipped something on his drink. If he now got drunk with four or five beers, instead of the usual ten, if the months at sea had taken their toll on him.

But no, there was something in the water. Scintillating scales, the colors of the rainbow, and something above them… algae, certainly. Then, why did they look so much like the honey blonde hair of a naked woman?

‘Andro is not around today,’ Hércules said, giving Aki a flask filled with liquor. One that burned his throat, one that made him cough and spit.

‘Andro?’

‘Our older sister. The Sea Witch, Airi… that, right there, do you see her? She turned her into what she is now. A mermaid. It’s a long story, perhaps for another day.’

Aki nodded. He still couldn’t be quite sure that these were no the delusions of an alcoholic, or a drug addict, or simply a person whose mind wasn’t healthy. But the truth was that there was something in the water, and that that something climbed a rock, and stared right into his eyes with ones equally as dark as his, of unfathomable depth.

And afterwards, only one question burned brightly in Aki’s mind – would her lips taste like sea water?

───⋆☆─────────────

Months passed. Cass was pregnant.

‘We didn’t expect it, but she told me the news and… I have asked her to marry me,’ Alexander had told him, with the brightest smile Aki had seen on a man. He was still a sailor, but he now went on shorter trips, always stopping at the tavern where his beloved awaited his return.

Aki had felt very happy for him. For them. They deserved such a thing – both of them had lived hard lives, until then, and the fact that they had found each other, well. Every man deserved hope, and warm arms to return to.

‘The mermaids will take care of you, my love. Come back to us,’ Cass had whispered after hugging Alexander goodbye, with a hand on the lower part of her belly. Not low enough that Aki hadn’t heard.

And, turned out, it was true. The mermaids followed the boat. The mermaids sang the storms away. The mermaids controlled the winds so that they would reach their destination as soon as possible, so that Alexander could return safely and before the baby was due. A black-haired one captaining them, beautiful and deadly, with eyes like an abyss and sharp teeth. Most days white. Some, stained with red.

He sometimes saw the blonde one, too. The one that had been plaguing his dreams. The one whose lips he could still conjure on lonely nights. Airi, Hércules had said.

Aki would find himself going to the ship’s bow and whispering it. Airi, Airi, Airi. Like an incantation, just to see if she appeared.

When she did, Aki wasn’t ready. But how could someone prepare to meet the love of your life?

A night spent talking.

The following one, when they had docked the boat in some small coastal town and as Aki walked through the beach, a shared kiss, that tasted of salt and iron and a little too much to drink.

[jofdiamonds]

The final notes of the song faded but his voice still lingered in her mind, speaking only to her. That was the power of her husband, of his creations, he gifted them to the world at large but Airi knew they were meant for her.

Three hundred years she had waited for him without knowing it. The word “love” didn’t make sense before him. And now, two centuries later, three letters held more meaning to her than anything else: Aki.

Even before becoming a vampire, Airi yearned for something more. 

Her parents had made sure she had a good education; her mother was a refined lady who held art in high regard, and she taught Airi to appreciate it. She had also inherited her mother’s wanderlust.

As a child, she loved to hear her father’s stories about the faraway land he came from, wondering if she’d see it one day.  

It was difficult for a young woman to travel alone, but after her transformation, Airi was not concerned for her safety. Her Master had done her a bigger favor than he could possibly imagine.

What had attracted that creature of the night to her? Why had he offered her his blood, the dark gift? He never told her. 

Airi had found him by chance. She’d heard the stories about a mysterious evil decimating neighboring towns, but she never imagined the “monster” would turn out to be her savior. 

Headstrong as she was, Airi refused each and every offer of marriage her father arranged; her mother supported this, she wanted Airi to choose for herself if that was what she wanted. After her mother’s passing, Airi’s father dismissed his late wife’s wishes and found her another suitor, going as far as threatening to lock Airi up until the wedding.

Just then, Airi crossed paths with one of Them. The Undead. She had readily surrendered her life to him when he promised her she would be free. 

As an immortal, she had a newfound appreciation for art, as if her eyes hadn’t really seen properly before. So she wandered those circles, becoming a patron for new artists, always keeping her distance but still inspiring some of them, fervent admirers who would include her in their work as a tribute.

And yet.

And yet, just as she had felt she’d never truly seen during her mortal life, she was convinced she had never truly loved before until she met Aki.

She had thought that loving someone would mean losing herself, she had even doubted that she could love at all. Maybe her ability to do so had died when she did. But now she knew that it was possible, to love, to find that meaning, that sense of belonging. Reciprocated devotion.

Her hand in his hand, her head on his shoulder, his voice in her ear. Kissing him would stop her heart if it was still beating.

A lifetime with him wouldn’t be enough, fortunately, they had all of eternity. 

Just as the song started again, Airi sat down to write a letter for her husband.

My beloved Aki, I shall be home soon and we shall have a few days for ourselves before the party, but I wanted to tell you about something I saw today. Remember that little museum in London? The one with a rather large collection of everyday Victorian objects, personal items that families donated or sold... I paid it a late night visit. I wanted to see if they still have our portrait on display among the main exhibit. And what should I find? A letter I wrote to you a few months after we met. Do you remember it?  I am used to seeing my face staring back at me from a painting, but these were my thoughts, my words to you. I would have blushed, if that were possible.  I was tempted to smash the glass and take it back. Let them have it, let them wonder what happened to the people who originally wrote it and read it.  Alas, this letter is rather less poetic than that one but… Who knows, maybe they will find it and display it one day, too. I adore your Vampire Heart. Yours Forever, Airi

[jofdiamonds]

The party was coming up.

And that meant, Aki would finally be reunited with his wife.

Airi.

The love of his life, the woman of his dreams. They said that good things came in small packages, but when it came to Airi, that wasn’t true. Whatever beauty was in this world was contained in 1.75 meters of silky skin, honey-blonde hair, full lips that remained rosy even after vampirism had stilled the blood running through their veins and eyes that made you feel as if you were wandering into an abyss, into the unknown. Oh, how his heart ached for her, even if they had been already married for two centuries, and had merely spent a few months apart. Oh, how he desired her, her company, her presence.

Something as simple as her footsteps in a different room. Her voice as she talked on the phone. The excitement of knowing he could make a turn and come across her, bump right into her, kiss her and show her his devotion in any way he deemed… 

Now, distance separated them. And it was not a tangible thing, not something he could fight with claws and fangs or a sword or, even using words. He just had to wait.

And, as he waited, he composed a song.

He did that, often, when they were apart. So that his voice would reach her ears (no matter how much he changed his register, she always knew it was him) and she would feel loved. Anywhere she went. Every day that passed.

It wasn’t a matter of jealousy, of claiming property. Aki knew Airi could caress other skin, kiss other lips, and yet, she wouldn’t feel what they felt when they were together. It was otherworldly. And they had this for eternity.

The song that was all over social media right now was called Vampire Heart. In allusion to what they both were; vampires, creatures of the night (but most people listened to it thinking it was nothing but a term to define immortal love). Airi for three hundred years more than him. Age difference would have bothered him back when he had been a human. Now, time was meaningless, vampirism not a curse but a blessing, that had allowed them to be together whereas, if they had led human lives, they would have died without even knowing about each other.

He was sure he would have gone to museums. Seen her face in art. Felt a deep longing. But nothing else, nothing more.

And now, however, he could sing her beautiful words, waiting for her return…

Let me bleed you this song of my heart deformed Lead you along this path in the dark Where I belong until I feel your warmth

Hold me like you held on to life When all fears came alive and entombed me Love me like you loved the sun Scorching the blood in my vampire heart

(...)

Let me weep you this poem as heaven's gates close Paint you my soul scarred and alone Waiting for your kiss to take me back home *

It was since Aki had met Airi that the word love had taken a completely different meaning.

It was since then that he had started to believe in its power, in its strength, in its significance. It was more than obvious for any empaths. They could not look at Airi and him, or at Andrómeda and Laszlo, without realizing the deep bond that they shared, the invisible string that pulled them together. And now, that was also the case for Vessel and Cassiopeia.

The way he caressed her hair, delicately, as if she could disappear from his arms any second, as if he couldn't believe that he was so lucky to have her in front of him. It was different, but perhaps, also quite similar, to the way he had contemplated Airi for an entire day after they had shared their first night together, afraid that if he would close his eyes –if only for a minute, just to rest his tired eyelids– she would vanish into thin air. 

Aki didn't think too much about his mother. Not because he didn't love her; quite the opposite. It was because her memory was too painful. A prostitute, he had been raised sneaking in and out of a somewhat fancy whorehouse that claimed to have the prettiest women from all around the world. Exotic ladies brought from places that most men attending the place hadn't even heard about. Asia, India, America…

His mother was a fan favorite. One of the most gorgeous women Aki had ever seen and would ever see. Luscious, straight black hair, so long it reached her lower back, an oval face with slanted eyes. Full lips, high cheekbones. An intelligent woman, who knew her worth, even if most people didn't and liked to play mahjong as a way to pass time. 

'One day you will find someone who will redefine the entire world for you. She, or he, will make you feel like your five senses were numbed for your whole life. Foods will taste better, the colors will seem brighter. Smells will be richer. You will find meanings in songs you would have never considered, you will notice feelings that were hiding in melodies. Their skin will feel like the softest fabric and the only thing to bring you comfort…' she had said, before putting him to bed, laying beside him.

He had been in his early fifties when he had finally met Airi. Fifty-seven when his mother had died, He had offered her the gift of immortality many times after turning, but she had rejected it time and time again. 

There's nothing for me after this, my son. No hope for other love, no need, either; everything I ever wanted to find I found it in you. Live for me. Love for me. Spend your days and nights devoted to those that make you feel alive, even if you are part of the undead. Don't be afraid. And always carry me in your memory.  He was just glad Airi had been able to meet her. It had felt like a ritual, when the wrinkled hand, full of brown patches due to old age, had closed against the pristine, intact, delicate one of his then soon-to-be wife. How his mother's dark eyes had looked into those of the blonde psychic vampire and the older woman had simply smiled and nodded, as if saying take good care of him.

[jofdiamonds]

The first time Aki had met Airi Takahashi, it hadn’t been in person.

He had been playing a few songs live in his friend Alex’s radio programme, in which he had created this character named Vessel. Vessel spoke to his listeners, shared opinions about music, movies, books and any other type of media. He also gossiped about things that went on in the campus, and answered calls – but that was secondary, because it wasn’t as if there were too many people awake at the tempestuous hours he retransmitted.

Except for a particular girl, who called almost every night. Cassiopeia García.

Aki knew her. Not personally, he hadn’t had the pleasure, but Alex wouldn’t shut up about her. They were friends, apparently. Maybe even something else, but Aki hadn’t pried and Alex hadn’t shared. The only thing the long-haired man knew was that Cass wasn’t aware that Vessel and Alex were the same person and that the young girl hated the podcast with a burning passion… or so she pretended. Because to Aki, and probably to the other five listeners of the programme, it seemed quite the opposite.

Cass would call, Vessel and her would banter – flirt, they were flirting, clearly – and then she’d hang up whenever she got bored. Now, she was talking after Aki had played his music, a rendition of a few classics (or so he considered them) that he enjoyed.

He was pressing his lips together to avoid laughing. It was at a moment of silence that he heard a voice in the background, someone who was pressing the Spanish woman to “say something about the awful cover that the other man had done”.

‘Oh, yeah,’ Cass said. Giggling in the background. ‘Airi wants me to say that your friend, this Aki guy, ruined her favorite song. You can’t add a trumpet to Arctic Monkeys. You just can’t.’

‘First of all, it’s not a trumpet.’ Alex had opened his mouth to answer, but Aki was quicker. Both his hands were now on the table, and he was using them to lift himself off his chair, his lips closer now to the microphone, so that whoever was that Airi girl could hear him clearly. ‘It’s a saxophone. And you can, because I just did. If she thinks she can do it better, she’s free to try her luck.’

The conversation could have gone on for hours. But it didn’t, because Cass yawned at one moment, exclaimed “hey, you are still using my phone!” and made Airi, who had probably snatched the device out of the other girl’s hand when things had gotten heated, hang up.

Aki had waited for a few minutes. Even an entire hour. Because as much as he hated to admit it, he had been secretly enjoying the conversation; Airi knew a lot about music. She had a beautiful voice, made great points, and definitely was a nice person to have an argument with.

But she hadn’t called back.

And that would have been fine by Aki, really, if it wasn’t because this need to hear her again, to know more about her, had installed in him and made a home out of the pit of his stomach, which was the part of his body that twisted and turned whenever he conjured up her name.

Airi.

The second time they had met each other, had been during band practice. Their drummer had a massive hangover and therefore hadn’t been able to join, which was the reason why Aki had taken his place. It had taken him a while to get used to the drums. He used to play them when he was younger, but soon everyone had decided he would be better off as a singer; his voice was melodious, strong, powerful, and he definitely had the charisma and sex appeal necessary to make it work.

They had been about to finish their set when they heard a person knocking furiously in the room of the building they had been using, in the lowest floor of the student residence hall, where Aki and the others lived.

The person behind was angry.

For a second, they joked about who it could be. Some massive, two meters tall football players? Well, goodbye to their beautiful faces for a week or two, if that was the case. Maybe someone who wanted to join as a spectator? Nah, they wouldn’t be that violent if that was the case.

Well, there was only one way to know.

Aki, as the singer and the unofficial leader, opened the door partially.

And behind it, was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. He wasn’t sure if he had ever laid eyes on her, but he decided no, it couldn’t be. He would remember. He would remember those slanted eyes, he would remember that soft skin, those full lips…

And the way she told them, angrily, if they were going to shut up soon or what, because her flat was apparently right on top of their practice room and she had an important test the next day.

Aki’s first impulse was to bow. To make a reverence, like a Victorian vampire would, to grab her hand and kiss the back of it, and to profusely apologize for any offense caused.

Instead, he just stood there, gaping. He was usually good with words. More than good; he composed haunting lyrics, all of the original song Type A Positive (his band) played, were his and only his. But now, he was speechless, opening and closing his mouth like a fish in a bowl, looking at her with interrogative eyes.

Do you want to go on a date with me?

What’s your name?

You’re stunning.

I will do whatever it is that you want…

Those were just a few of the things he could have said. Instead, he simply blinked and nodded and closed the door on her face, realizing his mistake seconds after it had occurred. He didn’t usually swear, but a strained “Fuck!” formed in his throat, and got out of him through gritted teeth.

‘Who was it?’

‘I don’t know, this blonde girl…’

‘Ah, yeah, I thought I recognized the voice. Airi Takahashi, right? Tatsu’s sister? From Fashion?’

Aki did know Tatsu. Not much, the boy had been finishing university when they had started, but he had been the DJ at every party the long-haired singer had attended. And a really, really good one, too.

But that was not what made his entrails move painfully. It was her name. Airi.

Aki was certain it was her. The girl who had complained about him ruining Arctic Monkeys for her. A person who had been on his mind months after merely hearing her voice. Not many people had that name, reminiscent of love and of jasmine.

What if he went out, now? Would her scent linger? Would her smell be like that of the flower? Rich, sweet, sensual, tenacious, musky? Wild?

Aki didn’t know. And he probably wouldn’t have the chance to find out; the girl seemed to hate his guts. But pure, unadulterated hatred was just a step away from love and the line between worlds could be easily crossed…

Or so he hoped.

@airi-of-hearts

[jofdiamonds]

When Aki had woken up in the hospital, there had been no one waiting by his bed.

He wouldn’t have expected it either way; he didn’t have many people in his life, not since his mother had passed. His bandmates had sent stuff, of course. Chocolates, flowers, balloons that read “Get well soon!”. But they had lives, and couldn’t spend most of them waiting for him to wake up from a three-day coma, unlike parents or siblings did.

Therefore, the first person he had exchanged words with had been his roommate. A man around his age, who had the top half of his face covered in bandages.

‘Hey, glad to see you up.’ He seemed sincere. How could he be so happy about the fate of a complete stranger? ‘My name’s Alex.’

They had introduced each other, talked a little bit. When Aki had mentioned he was a singer, Alex had laughed and nodded, pointing with his head towards the door.

‘Ah, I guessed you were someone famous. Every few days a paparazzi tries to sneak in and take some pictures, bribe the nurses for information.’

He must have seen the apprehension in Aki’s features, because he quickly added: ‘Don’t worry, though. Nothing has leaked.’

In a surprising turn of events, Aki had probably made his first real friend in years.

He had smiled, laughed. And when he had got discharged from the hospital, he had exchanged numbers with Alex, promising to meet again soon. For coffee, for a jamming session, since he liked to sing and played many instruments as well, or… simply to catch up.

And still, happy as he was, Aki couldn’t shake the feeling that he had lost something.

He couldn’t even begin to explain what it was. He had been on his car when the meteorite had stuck Shibuya – a rare occurrence, but definitely possible scientifically speaking – on the way to some photoshoot to promote his next album. His heart had stopped for a little bit over four minutes. The doctors had reanimated him and, surprisingly, hadn’t found any permanent brain damage due to the lack of oxygen. "You're extremely lucky", they had told him.

And yet, Aki knew something was wrong, deep inside.

His songs revealed as much. His pen furiously scribbling on the pages of his notebook, writing about a woman he didn’t know, that maybe he had seen only as he had been crossing the bridge between life and death. That he was certain he wouldn’t stop looking for, and would always hope to reunite with… even if it took him decades to do so.

Nothing could compare. No one.

───⋆☆─────────────

‘So your girl is a fan, huh?’ Aki asked, perfectly drawn eyebrows raised.

‘She is,’ Alex nodded, his face shining bright, like every time he talked about Cass. They had also met in the hospital; she had been a victim of the meteorite too. It had been love at first sight, on both parts, or that was what the blue-eyed man had said. ‘When I told her I was going to hang out with you she almost had a heart attack. She proceeded to show me pictures of her as a teenager, dressed in black, wearing the same makeup as you do now and to give me a Top 10 of her favorite songs of yours.’

Aki couldn’t help but laugh, finding it endearing. ‘And you think that if I played in her birthday party…?’

‘I would be crowned the best boyfriend ever.’

A warm smile extending over the long-haired man’s lips, painted dark purple. He pretended to think about it for a little bit. But they both knew what the answer was going to be.

‘Fine. I will sing on Cass’ birthday.’

───⋆☆─────────────

The day of the party came.

Aki didn’t know why he bothered putting on a show, he could have sat on a chair and sang without extenuating himself; the birthday girl’s eyes didn’t left Alex’s face, not even for a second, as she sang the lyrics (most of them about love) straight to him, stealing them from Aki and making them hers. Theirs.

This was, however, part of why he had become a singer, wasn’t it?

To make people feel things. Evoke emotions in them.

He was smiling when he finished his repertoire, leaving the mic there for an improvised karaoke contest organized by Cass’ brother, Hércules, who seemed to be as good of a showman as Aki was, even without the years of practice. He walked to the bar area to get a drink when he saw her.

A blonde woman, with long straight hair, a heart-shaped face. Freckles adorning it, beauty spots that Aki wished he could kiss, one by one. Had he died and gone to Heaven? No, but that was an angel was certainly walking amongst mortals. A goddess… like that of his dreams, whose face had always been hidden by some fog. But that he was sure looked very much like that of the girl.

He had to introduce himself. He had to approach her, ask her something. Whatever, it didn’t matter: how long had she known Cass for, if she liked the drink she was having, what was her favorite type of cake… He was scrambling his brains for something when she looked at him, smiled, and congratulated him for the concert.

Her voice. And the fact that he, who used his to earn a living, had lost his.

‘Thank you.’ He finally managed, with a croak. For existing, Aki added to himself, for approaching me.

He couldn’t let the opportunity pass. And that’s why he offered to pay for the woman’s next drink.

‘All drinks are free,' she laughed, but not at him. ‘The price was included in the reservation of the place.’

‘Then, let me give you my name. Aki.’

Would bowing to her be too much? Perhaps, but he was a strange man of strange customs, and so he did. She didn’t seem to mind, because she smiled and replied with a word Aki hoped he could say every single day from then on; Airi.

Night went on, ending with a kiss goodbye at her door and a promise to see each other soon.

‘In the morning, soon?’ A plea to a God. They were usually deaf, blind, and mute. But this one answered, curving the corners of her lips upwards.

‘Perhaps.’

───⋆☆─────────────

The next time he performed, Aki’s dark eyes darted across the room until they found hers. In the first row, the object of his devotion, love in the purest form.

He thanked everyone in the crowd for their attendance. Grinned at their exhilaration. Sang. But he had to apologize, secretly if he wouldn’t do it out loud, because his music today – and ever since she had walked into his life – was not for them, not really. It belonged to the person whose beating heart pumped blood at the same rhythm as Aki’s. Airi Takahashi.

No, I won't surrenderAt any costYou're something so sweet and tenderFrom my heart

Yes I've done my evilI've done my goodJust believe me honeyI won't let go of you

You are the oneAnd there's no regrets at all

Two souls that would always find themselves, no matter the circumstances. A love story being written, right before everyone's eyes.

[jofdiamonds]

Mine. As I am hers.

i.e. …

♥️

[jofdiamonds]

[jofdiamonds]

Your absence pains me.

I always start my letters the same way, don’t I? I shall try to innovate the next time.

But you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Especially not an old dog who is so madly in love with you. My angel, the light in the darkness, the person who holds my heart in her chest, next to hers.

Airi.

Your name shouldn’t be said out loud. The other day, someone asked about you – I can’t remember who it was no longer, I don’t pay attention to the myriad of faces perturbing me during the sessions of the Vampiric Council, not when you’re not holding my hand, reminding me that there are important matters being discussed and that I can’t spend the seconds, minutes, hours, thinking about you – but they did. A simple question, something like how’s Airi?, well intended, sweet. But my first impulse was to stitch their lips together so that they could utter no more words for their entire lifespan. How dare you pronounce the name of my beloved? A name that should be like that of a God; never said in vain.

I exaggerate, my love. But you know I like flair and extravagance. Now, the reason why I was writing. I wrote a new song for you. A trenodia; a poem of lamentation.

I compare our love to death – because it is never-ending and there’s no coming back from it. I compare our hearts to kintsugi, the Japanese art of putting broken pottery back together with gold. Because they were broken, but repaired anew, and made stronger, more beautiful.

Fierce, like you are.

Hopefully, I can get the discography to have it out soon. Before you come back. So that one day you can hear it on the radio as you pass through a restaurant about to close and you can stay, and listen, and think of me. Of a simple man who awaits your return. Who craves you. Who will wait, patiently, even if his first impulse each and every night is to go find you, wherever you are, just to share a kiss...

One day, I will sing it to you, while you stare into my eyes.

Forever lost in you,

Aki.

@airi-of-hearts

[jofdiamonds]

Days after his conversation with Vessel, Aki had entered his room to find Cassiopeia García sitting on his bed, no doubt waiting for him, judging by the boredom that impregnated her foreign features.

Her lips slightly pursed, her hands placed on the mattress, slightly behind her, putting up with her weight, since her body was leaning backwards. She was humming a song, quite still, but Aki was a fellow artist, as observant as his painting counterpart, and could see that she had definitely had been having a good time inside his bedroom; a book on his shelf, slightly out of place, a smudge of paint in one of his drawers that wasn't there before... Cass had tried to mask it, of course, but not well enough.

Or maybe, just maybe, she hadn't tried at all, because now he was looking at him with a shark-like grin, higher on one side than on the other. Vessel had been right to describe her as a force of nature, as someone who didn't do anything she didn't want to do. There were Kings, and Queens, and Jack, but Cass here, was the Joker.

'I have talked to Airi.' She said, the second she saw that Aki was going to open his mouth to question the reason behind her presence in his bedroom. 'She's willing to listen to you. I haven't said anything of what you mentioned to Vessel. That's something she needs to hear from you, not me, not him. You fucked up biiiiiiig tiiiiiiiime.' She added, just before she stood up and walked towards the door, and therefore, closer to Aki.

'She'll be here innnn maybe an hour. Maybe less. Time's a construct, I don't really know.' She shrugged. She was tall for a woman, especially when it came to Japanese standards, but she still had to lift her chin to look at him in the eyes. 'No need to thank me. Doing this for Vesselito, not really for you. If you hurt her again, however...'

Cass placed a thumb on one side of her neck, and moved it to the other, just as she leaned her head towards one shoulder and stuck out her tongue.

'I'll feed you to Andro.' She simply resolved, and made her way out, leaving him with his mouth wide open, not able to utter a single word.

@airi-of-hearts

[jofdiamonds]

In another place, a different time... an alternate universe Ficlet for @andromedagarcia ♥ (@jofdiamonds)

Nighttime. The soft glow of the planetoid’s three moons illuminated her face. This face, her current mask. Airi leaned on the windowsill and let the wind play with her hair. 

The black vastness of the ocean felt oddly comforting. It had the same sound as the one back home. Or so she’d been told, she’d never been “home”, but then why did the ocean make her feel so nostalgic? Why did it make her long for a home she never knew? 

The night was cold but it didn’t bother her. For one thing, because her body had been enhanced to withstand much worse conditions than the faint sea breeze that would have made her shiver before, in some other time, some other body; for another, because she’d found him. And in finding him, she’d found herself. Nothing could vex her.

The room she’d found at The Nevermore wasn’t exactly what she would have liked. But it was fine, it would do, and the AI hotel hadn’t really asked a lot of questions. If she had the credits, she was welcome as a guest and her privacy and her business would be protected.

Airi tore her eyes from the window and stared at the reclining figure on the bed. The man was sleeping soundly.

‘Give him time to reboot.’ That was what the dealer that had helped her find a sleeve for his stack had told her.

I will find you. In every world, every universe, every timeline. Nothing will keep me away from you. A thousand years could turn into eons and I would not forget your name, your face, your heart, your love.

She recited the vows they’d made to each other. Airi intended to keep her promise. Would he recognize her? She was sure he would, but she still prayed he did.

‘We’ve been through so much,’ she whispered to him. ‘Lived entire lifetimes. And we still have many more to live.’ 

They have changed, evolved. Transhuman. More than human. 

After every modification, every enhancement, she wondered if there was still any original part of her left. It didn’t matter. As long as there was even a single atom that could call itself hers, it would know him, it would pull her to him. Equal parts love and quantum entanglement.

Airi walked to the other end of the room, to the window that looked toward the city. The neon lights called to her but at present, she had something more important to do.

She sat on the bed, slowly, carefully, and she caressed his face, she couldn’t help it. Metal, metal. Metal on metal and still so soft. The tingling in her fingers told her he must be about to wake up.

What a nice little trick, she thought. This sleeve, her current body, had a neat improvement: her fingertips could detect magnetic fields, maybe even manipulate them. Airi had heard about this particular upgrade, one of the first ones that the transhumanists had accomplished. It was said that a century ago, it would have been considered akin to magic; now, it was one of the most basic modifications anyone could have. It came in handy to tamper with all sorts of machines.

Airi caressed his face again, enjoying the sensation in her fingers. She curled a strand of his long dark hair around her index finger. Long hair would suit him so well, she’d found him a good sleeve.

She leaned closer to him, her lips not an inch away from his. As if this was a fairytale, and he was the slumbering prince.

‘Wake up, my love. Wake up, Aki.’

[jofdiamonds]

@airi-of-hearts

[jofdiamonds]

@airi-of-hearts

[jofdiamonds]

Hope.

A dangerous thing to have in a place like the Borderlands.

And Aki still found himself full of it, surprisingly.

Hope that it was not too late, that she would like to see him again, that she would forgive him for not saying anything in response to her letter, especially since he really couldn't tell her the reason for his silence. If he would confess to being a face card, then... what? He could join games, even if he didn't have to, to try and keep his real identity a secret. But still, then... Silence as heavy as the lid of a tomb, burying him alive and submerging the entire world in darkness. The question now was; how long did he have until he ran out of air?

He took a deep breath.

'I thank you, Vessel. Sincerely. You have helped me a lot today,' Aki had shown him his heart. And the masked man could have laughed, ignored him. Went to live a happy life with the woman he loved, leave him to drown in the tempestuous tides surrounding him from all fronts. Instead, he had given him a hand, the push he didn't know he needed. Aki had jumped into the abyss and he had never felt more alive. 'I have... one last question, perhaps, if you wouldn't mind.'

'Do you think you could ask Cass to help me? I know she probably dislikes me because I hurt her friend. Could you explain the situation? Somehow? Without getting into details of...' Of what we really are. Of who we really are. 'I don't know if I could simply show up. If maybe Airi needs convincing to speak with me again. But... could you maybe talk with her so that she...?' Aki usually had a way with words. But today, it didn't seem like it. He was blocked. His muse was gone.

Because Airi had left, and she had taken everything that once had shone bright with her.

New love should have brought nothing but joy, excitement; a blossoming feeling with a thousand possibilities. But in a place such as this, it was a cause of consternation and distress.

If Vessel hadn’t heard it from Aki himself, he wouldn’t have believed it, a Diamonds Face Card under the spell of love. And all the emotions that came with it. Uncertainty, agitation, a certain kind of fear. Yet, hope was absent.

Aki seemed to have withdrawn into himself, thinking, probably analyzing every course of action and the probable consequences. Vessel let him have that moment.

The next stage of the games, the Face Card games, was fast approaching. No matter how much Vessel wanted to stop time, or will it to run slower, the day would come. He wasn’t oblivious to this. But he had something that Aki seemed to lack, at least at present. Hope. Vessel was counting on being able to help Cass get out, that was his only concern. 

Would it hurt? Yes. It would hurt her when she realized they couldn’t get out of the Borderlands together, and it would hurt him to see her go, but he would die happy with the knowledge that she would shine her light on the real world. He would surrender his life willingly if the last thing he got to see was her face. 

But there was also something else. As deluded as it may sound, Vessel also had a tiny spark of faith. What if something happened that allowed them to go back together? He didn’t know what but just as they all had ended up here, maybe there was still a way for everyone to go back. Didn’t comatose patients sometimes wake up after years of unconsciousness?   

‘Whatever you choose to do, Aki, I wish you luck. And I hope you… dare to hope. I have but the tiniest sliver of it at the moment. But if I find a reason to hope, I will share it with you.’

[jofdiamonds]

Aki nodded silently, without interrupting, as he heard Vessel's explanation. What Cass meant to him. The first ray of sunshine after the darkest night. He could have used those words for Airi, too. It was exactly how he felt about her.

He had compared her to the Garden of Eden; to a flower growing in a desolated cemetery, a place of death; to an angel from above; to his salvation as well as to his damnation. But maybe it was as simple (and as beautiful) as saying she was his sunshine. He had always lived in the dark, and finally, the brightest, warmest, biggest star, had decided to shine for him. After thirty, long years, she had appeared, and Aki simply refused to go back to the way things were.

'I know I'm hurting her.' He finally replied, after pondering the other man's words for a few seconds. Looking away, he wondered, not for the first time, why it was so difficult to put things into words but so easy writing them in paper, when it came to a feeling so real, and so dear, as love. 'But I'm doing this because... won't it be even worse when I die? Or when she...' He couldn't even consider the possibility, the mere thought of her death bringing imaginable pain with it. But, most likely, Vessel knew what he meant.

'When the second part of the games start, it's either them or us.' And he knew what he would choose. Them. He would want Airi to survive, even if that meant dying. He had cheated Death already, once too many times, and the only reason he wouldn't welcome It like an old friend would be because It would be the one to separate him from Airi. To open a chasm between them they couldn't cross.

'I guess I've never been afraid, not until now.' And there was not a single thing about this situation that didn't scare him. He couldn't simply give in, it wasn't as easy for him as it seemed to be for Vessel. But his words had made him think, and Aki realized: he wanted Airi. He needed her, like a mortal needed breathing, and water, and nurturing. He still didn't know how to approach it. Lying? Hiding parts of the truth? Being completely honest?

Would she even want to speak with him? It had been days since she given that letter to Cass. Vessel's blonde hurricane had, for sure, already informed Airi of the conversation between Aki and her. The fact that he had not reacted at all, doing nothing but wallowing in his pain... would that play against him?

There it was. Love. So simple and yet so complicated. A thousand times more complicated in a place like this. Vessel hadn’t expected such a confession from Aki. He uncrossed his arms, relaxing his previously defensive posture. He would offer Aki a smile but he didn’t want the Jack of Diamonds to think he was being condescending. Quite the opposite, Vessel understood him.

‘I see,’ Vessel said. He considered Aki’s questions carefully. The truth was that Vessel was still trying to figure his own answers with regards to Cass, but he didn’t want to leave Aki to his agitation.

‘With Cass it just… happened. She came into my world like the first ray of sunshine after the darkest night. And now I feel like she’s a part of me, that we’ve known each other forever. I haven’t told her what I am, my role here. If she suspects, she hasn’t asked me.’ 

Vessel looked away. He knew he would have to tell her eventually. It would become obvious that he didn’t join any games, and didn't have to worry about the days on his visa running out. How to broach that subject with her? He would spare her as much pain as he could, but it was best if she knew everything. He shook his head and faced Aki again.

‘As to your other question… How do I do it?’ Vessel took a deep breath, suddenly very conscious that he hadn’t given too much thought to that. He’d just done it. But maybe a Diamonds specialist needed to rationalize it much more. 

Vessel asked the deity to guide his words. ‘Death is inevitable anyway, isn’t it? Even if we weren’t here, anything could take her from you or you from her at any moment. Here that feels more true, more violent, but still… would you deny yourself a day in heaven just because you know you’ll end up in hell?’ Vessel asked, a musical cadence to his words. ‘Hell will be there anyway, whether you enjoyed your life or not. You could wait a hundred years and never know the bliss of having your feelings reciprocated. If she loves you… you’re not only hurting yourself by staying away, you’re hurting her.’

He took a step back, giving Aki space. ‘I don’t claim to know best, that is for you to decide. All I can say is… It’s better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. Don’t you think?’

[jofdiamonds]

Yes.

Aki had always thought of Spades players as brainless creatures. People who relied on their body because they couldn't do so on their minds. Head empty, devoid of intelligence, of common sense. Brute force the answer to any of their problems. And Vessel's words just proved his theories, but also, a small part of him couldn't help but stop and wonder if maybe he was much, much smarter than him.

Because he, at least, could get to enjoy his feelings while they lasted.

While they were both alive.

'Does she know? About the fact that we are not exactly players?' How did he do it? Did he hide that from her? What had been his course of action? Had it simply happened? The questions were flooding his head, causing him a headache. A part of him wanted to hold the Jack of Spades by his shoulders, rip that mask off to see his expression and scream at him, demand to know. But Aki was sure that wouldn't get him anywhere. So he remained calm, a stone withstanding the passing waters of a river, the weathering of time.

'I'm asking because...' he couldn't say it out loud. If he did, if he pronounced the words instead of writing them, it would become real. But no one could understand him other than the man standing in front of him. So he took a deep breath and, after running his pale, long fingers through his hair, open his mouth and trusted his instincts. 'I'm in love with Airi. Cass' friend.'

A tentative look on his face, as if stating it was an invocation of kinds. How would the God of this place punish him? What plague would he unleash upon the world? Frogs? Death of the first born son? Simply bad luck? The destruction of the woman he would give his life for? 'I know she has feelings for me too.' He still couldn't believe that, and he would only do so once she talked to him about it. If she talked to him about it, or ever again. 'I haven't acted of them because I know it ends with death. Hers or mine. So I wanted to ask you...'

A million questions. But the simplest one.

'How do you do it?'

As the meeting drew to a close amid shrill laughter and even some congratulatory claps, Vessel got ready to leave, his mind already set on Cass and on how he could help her, preferably without endangering himself.

Vessel shook his head almost imperceptibly at those laughing the loudest, feeling the same contempt for them as they felt for the players. A tad hypocritical of him? Maybe. But when he’d taken the role of the Jack of Spades, he’d had a purpose, something that he wanted to convey, to teach and to learn. But none of that mattered now. For Vessel all that mattered now was Cass. If he could find a way out for her, if he could find a way out for the two of them… 

Hearing his name in a deep clear voice brought Vessel out of his reverie. He turned around to face the deadly Jack of Diamonds. While Vessel had half-expected Aki would come talk to him, Aki’s question had shocked him. Straight to the point. 

‘Are you in a relationship with one of the players?’ Aki’s words ringed in Vessel’s ears.

How much did Aki know? Had he met Cass? A stab of something not unlike jealousy made Vessel dig his nails into his palms but he relaxed again almost immediately. Even if that was the case, he could be polite to Aki. But how to reply? Many possibilities whirled in his head, but he knew what he wanted to say. 

‘Yes,’ Vessel said, nodding at the same time, as straightforward as the question had been. He didn’t know Aki’s motive for asking, but he knew he would never deny Cass–unless it was in her best interest that he did, and Vessel didn’t feel any animosity coming from Aki, more like genuine curiosity and just a hint of incredulity or perhaps mild disdain. 

Vessel was about to turn on his heel and leave, but instead he crossed his arms. He didn’t want to come off as aggressive, but he had to know where this was coming from, in case he had to warn Cass. ‘Why are you asking? Are you going to lecture me about why that’s an awful idea? Or better yet, are you going to tell the Kings and Queens to see what they do to me? Just know this: I am ready to die for her, but I am not going to do so easily. I’ll fight and I’ll live for her as well.’

[jofdiamonds]

Wrote this for the Drug Cartel AU @cheshire-shuntaro created. Aki is a hired murderer (and well, anything else as long as the pay is good) working for the same organization as @j-ofspades ~

Aki wasn't a careful killer.

And that's about as much as anybody could say about him, closed as he was; he had left clues in every murder he had ever committed, confusing ones, yes, that didn't quite follow a pattern. Enough to continually play a game of cat and mouse with the police who were looking for him but not to get caught.

What could he say? Was there a way he could justify himself? He loved the adrenaline. It was a change from his usual way of feeling: he was continuously numb, like a body buried underwater, sounds and images blurry to him. His only companion? His thoughts and prayers. One would think oh, probably, he's hoping for a way out. A change of life, of scenery. Giving up on a life of stabbing, hanging, poisoning, breaking legs and arms, collecting money from people who don't have any... and they'd be wrong. Although, not completely.

He wanted to get caught. Destroyed, weathered to nothing.

He wanted to be able to wash away the blood of his hands.

He loved to show-off. Speak with his contracts before delivering the final blow. A sort of inside joke between him and the person whose life he was ending, an unbreakable bond he would treasure forever. Simple statements like beg for your life, somebody wants you dead, sleep now and forever... nobody said that being a good murderer had to come with a creative imagination, now, did they? Perhaps, secretly, she was hoping one of them was lucky enough to survive and go to the police. But, such a shame I am so good at this job.

He was sitting in a hotel room in the darkness, his only company as well as source of light the candles he had lit hours ago, and the wax dripping from them to the wooden surface of the table. A rhythmical sound. Tap, tap, tap. Like droplets of blood falling to the ground from a severed neck... Outside, wind hollowed incessantly. Sometimes, a little bit of it came through the old, tattered window, making the candles flicker. Like in horror movies, before something big happened. An ill omen.

A ringing, annoying, sound, all of a sudden. A phone call.

If Aki's calculations weren't wrong, it was around four in the morning. Who had decided to interrupt his slumber? Unknown call. Only could be one person, then.

The Ritual.

'Sir?'

'Go to Mar del Plata and accompany Vessel. He has a mission and it can't go wrong.'

I'm not anybody's nanny. Plus, the masked creepy man and I don't get along and don't work well together. Have you already forgotten about the job in Barcelona?

There was no point telling any of that to the chilling voice on the other line. So, with a simple yes, Aki hung up the phone.

He prepared to leave.

He blew out the candles.

[jofdiamonds]

Tears had dried. Sadness had passed, replaced by numbness. The familiar lack of feelings he longed for, so much. Only, it was like being blinded after looking at the Garden of Eden. He had experienced the most wonderful of feelings; reciprocated love by the woman of his dreams. And he had tore it all apart, made her think he didn't want anything to do with her.

He had his reasons. Reasons as heavy as the weight on his chest, right now. Whenever he conjured her brown eyes and the smell of her hair. The touch of her hand... Voices around him, but he couldn't hear them. What were they discussing, some game? Some new tactic they wanted to try out? The bloody versus those who wanted to give the players a fair chance. Which side did Aki belong to?

He stared at Vessel, purple-painted lips pressed together as he waited for his turn to speak, if he had anything to say at all. Was it true? Was the man, the Jack of Spades, in love with Cass? Had he given in to the temptation? Of course, Spades players were usually brainless, but still... He remembered the curly-haired whirlwind that had visited him, turned his world around with her news like a sweeping hurricane. Her fingers stained with paint. The same that now adorned the man's body.

And it was, then, when he noticed his silent salute.

A secret understanding, maybe?

Was Aki reading more into it than what there really was?

The meeting ended, after an hour. Aki had hardly intervened; what for? He'd keep doing what he was doing. Create games to the best of his ability, hoping Airi would never participate in one of them. But now, he wanted to speak with Vessel. Placing a hand on the masked man's shoulder, before he left the room, he said: 'Vessel. Can we speak for a second?'

Waiting until everybody was gone, he decided it was better to be blunt. Straightforward. No point beating around the bush. Wouldn't get them anywhere, and they were not exactly friends. 'Are you in a relationship with one of the players?'

♢♤ @jofdiamonds ♢♤

Vessel leaned against the wall, watching, waiting. He had never liked meetings, and he hoped he’d left that behind when he found himself in the Borderlands. Yet, the Face Card’s assembly felt much more serious than any ‘real’ job he ever had. The irony was not lost on him.

If he had a watch he would’ve checked it and sighed. Instead, he adjusted his mask and looked around.

The Kings and Queens were deep in conversation. The next phase of the games was still away but they were talking about the regular games, discussing ways to make them more interesting. The Jacks were standing at a polite distance, waiting for their turn to speak. 

Vessel didn’t like any of them in particular. He didn’t dislike them either, but he didn’t feel compelled to be friendly or approachable in a place like this. He let his eyes linger on the tall broad figure leaning on a pillar at the far side of the room, almost as if he were imitating Vessel’s posture.

Aki. The Jack of Diamonds. Vessel would have respected him much more if he hadn’t overheard Aki mocking Spades games. But he didn’t want to fight, what was the point? That had happened some time ago and since then, Aki seemed… different. Vessel couldn’t quite tell why but there was something off. Vessel knew, because there was something off about himself, too. Could it be? 

From where he was, he nodded at Aki in a silent salute. It may pay to make a friend. After all… he might need help.