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josieisataystan · 2 years ago

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grey skies and memories of you - - mason mount x reader.

summary: after 8 months of no contact you’re surprised to find and even talk with him. but every small details from the past brings you there today. just the two of you still hopelessly inlove.

request are open! feel free to send and feedback is appreciated 🫶🏻 not proofreaded!

You feel a gentle hand across your bare back, you look up startled only to be met with familiar brown eyes. Your hand that was currently set below your chin was now resting on the brown counter, looking with wide eyes at Mason. His gaze softened… his hand still remained on your back. “I knew it was you… I had to come to look just to be sure… your shorter hair was throwing me off…” he commented. You are still speechless since it was over 8 months since you last spoke to him.

Mason tried, hell, he was doing anything just to get a simple text back from you, but you gave in nothing. He was confused, he wanted to remain friends after the friendship you held before the relationship, especially after remaining on a good note. He did have to tell himself he did break things off with you.

“What are you doing here?” you finally spoke watching as he took the seat beside you. “I'm here with the lads, they're over there,” he pointed at the corner, you curiously turned your head and observed the chanty teammates of his simply partying. You turned your head back and looked down at your hands humming. “We're here to welcome the new players and just enjoy our time off,” he stated.

“Why the short hair?” he asked after a few seconds of silence. “Oh-uhm- Just wanted something newer, you know?” you shrug your shoulder trying to avoid the intimate eye contact he always held. But what you said were lies… it was more of a drunken decision. You were nervous already, but that would be the cherry on top. He nodded, Mason, desperately just wanting to talk to you about anything, even if it was those silly puns you used to say.

“Two cranberry tequilas please,” Mason yelled loudly to the bartender, holding up two fingers. “I'm hoping that is still your favorite?” he said looking over at you who stared out into the space infront. “Yes. Hasn't changed,” you chuckled. Mason nodded, his leg beginning to bounce. “Stop… you're going to make me more nervous,” you leaned over after a minute, placing your hand on his thigh and finally looking into his eyes. His brown eyes still holding the desire and love for you.

“Y/n…” he said so delicately his right hand reaching over and rubbing your cheek. “What are you doing here?” you ask again. He shakes his head, Mason is not even sure why he was still sitting here. “I don't know to talk I guess?” he offers a sad smile and shrugs his shoulder, his hand coming down from your cheek.

“Just talk?”

“Maybe reminisce old times? Talk about how we've been? Anything so that I can hear your voice again…” Mason finds himself admitting to you. You laugh shaking your head, “There's that smile,” Mason compliments, bringing a smile and blush to your face. The bartender brings both drinks, accepting your card before Mason could pull his out. A little banter of course but it was just drinks.

“To talking or wherever we were,” you say, the two of you raise your glasses and clink them together.

~~~~~

After two more cranberry tequilas, two glasses of wine, and some shots, you sure were feeling the effect, Mason a bit too. You quietly paid attention to him talking mostly about his family, his time at Chelsea so far, and a lads' trip after the world cup. He could feel his heart beat faster anytime you smiled and locked eyes with him while talking. The feelings and love are still there.

You wanted to so badly get closer to him but you knew where your self-respect and loyalty layed. A lot changed in 8 months for both of you, and you weren't ready to throw the barrier you built after the breakup. You swirl the black straw around the almost empty glass, watching how the ice slowly melts and hearing it click against the glass. You laugh and throw your head back a bit as you thought of an old memory.

“Do you remember that Turks and Caicos trip we took? Where we accidentally fell asleep at the beach during the sunrise after a night out and woke up sunburnt?” you snort. Mason laughs thinking back to how you had to walk around with a handprint on your leg. “Oh my god! The little kid that found us?” he adds, making you laugh harder.

“I remember that trip fairly well…” Mason says, his brows drawing in together but a small smile still present. “I do too. I can't forget it. Any part of it…” you say, your mind immediately goes back to the sunset dinner where he pulled out a promise ring, promising that one day you’d get married and this ring would be on the necklace you wear with his initial.

“Do you still have it?” he asks carefully, looking at you. You nod, and he watches as you sit up straight and pull your necklace out of your shirt. “I do. I have it here at all times. Im afraid ill misplace it in my flat,” you joke. “Can I?” he points to your necklace wanting to take a closer look, you nod, and his finger reaches up and observes the small carved letters inside and the jewels around the band.

You begin to overthink, and begin to ramble even stutter, “If you want to have it back, I completely understand-”. Mason shakes his head while his eyes close, “No no, it's okay love. I know and trust it's in good hands. Plus it would just be a reminder to me that you aren't mine anymore…”

His. Mine. You aren’t his anymore. And that’s the sad reality of it.

“Do you ever think about us? You know what we used to have?” you ask, leaning your head on the propped arm on the counter. He licks his lips and nods admittedly, “All the time. And let me tell you it hurts like hell.”

You remain quiet because part of you knows how you haven't done anything to prove you feel the same way he does. His fists gently bangs the table a couple of time, before resting the palm over the smooth surface. “How come you never responded to any of my calls or texts?” she says upset, almost even slightly angry as his voice raises a bit. Mason brings a hand to his hair running his fingers through it.

“Mason we needed time apart. I needed time apart not just from you but from everyone and everything around me. I didn't respond to you because it hurt Mason, it hurt me so much because you broke things off between us. A call or text wasn't going to fix things and especially how I felt?” you said trying to defend yourself, your voice coming off shaky.

You felt more sober as you tried to fight back the lump and tears that wanted to form. “You gave up on us so quick Mase…” you croak feeling a tear run down your cheek. “One second we were together on your couch or our picnics and then suddenly I'm packing up my stuff from your house…”

“Do you not know how hard that is to process? To lose the one person who promised me who would never leave?” you say with a sad smile. “The person who was always there to hug me after a tough day? Bring me a coffee to bed in the morning when I stayed over? The person who valued me for who I was? Never judged or went behind my back?”

Mason frowned, realizing how just terribly he hurt you. “You left me when I most needed you! How do you think I felt to see a couple of weeks later that you moved on?” you cry out, trying to get unanswered questions answered so you could maybe finally move on.

“I haven’t moved on! I can’t even try because they would never love me as you did, and it's hard to love someone who isn't you Y/n! Who doesn't treat me the same way as you…” he cries out. “Fuck Y/n! I regret it every single day. I live with the constant guilt every day. Although you’re gone, your image is still trapped inside my head!”

“I can’t even sleep because every breath I took was yours next to mine. I get it, I know I fucked up-”

“Our story ended, our fairytale had an end to it. All of our promises and memories ended in nothing. Do you want me to sit here and tell you about how I miss you so deeply? That anytime I hear your name brought up I panic? That when they put our song I immediately think and remember of you? There! Easier said than done!” you gulp, his now tear-stained face staring at you.

He suddenly becomes aware of your movements, you wiping your tears away, how you pay the bartender, pick your hand wallet up, and put on your coat. His anxiety raises as he thinks he's about to lose you again for good. “Y/n! You can’t just leave,” he yells out loud knowing it won't change your mind.

“Watch me.”

And he does, watching you as you pass through dancing bodies to the doors in front, your figure slowly disappearing as you took a right turn. He sighs deeply, running a hand through his hair tugging the ends, his chest feeling heavier than before, he looks over to his left once more to see if he was just dreaming things but all he sees is an empty seat and the bartender staring at him as he wipes off the cups left behind.

Mason hoped things went a different direction when he had approached you. He knew it wouldn’t be easy but he had to at least try. But all he feels now is stupidity, thinking that he actually listened to a drunk Ben and did what he did. He didn’t want to seem rude, especially to the newest teammates that had arrived, so he swallows down the pain and goes to say goodbye.

“I'm headed out. I’ll see you guys next week?” he says bro hugging everyone, but Kai pulls him aside when he notices his friend's mood and body language. “I understand it’s none of my business, but what happened? You don’t look okay…” the german said. Mason shook his head trying to get rid of your memory.

“It was going great! It felt so real to be back with her. But things took a turn and then we slightly argued and she left. Kai, I feel like an idiot! This would’ve never happened if I didn’t did what I did… She probably doesn’t even trust me, or even worse in my eyes, has a bit of love for me inside…”

“Listen, I'm not so good at this but give it more time. It’s going to hurt more than already but it’s worth it if in the end it means you’ll be with her again. That’s if the two of you are willing to try… Giver her the needed space for right now and then go to her again. Prove to her that you’re still in love with her,” Kai says seriously, his hand resting on Mason’s shoulder.

“She says I gave up on her, on us, so quick…” whispers Mason. Kai shakes his head understandably, “I get that. Maybe you did, maybe you didn’t. What matters right now is trying to earn her back.”

“You sure give better advice than Chilly,” Mason teases, and laughs when Kai rolls his eyes. “Cmon, I'll drop you off since you have alcohol in your system. I could smell it a mile away,” now it’s Kai’s turn to tease laughing when Mason laughs loudly.

~~~~~

“Yes if there are 10 let it and make it be 100 more… Derek words not mine… He asked for them… No but… Well you might… Of course! I’ll be sure to be in contact with you… Okay talk soon, take care bye,” you groaned at the last call knowing it was the reason for the now present headache.

The last two weeks are taking a toll on you since you haven't taken a single day off. Part of the reasoning is with money and the second as a reminder that if you’re left alone your thoughts go running back to him… “Y/n! Derek needs you to do more calls! Come to the front office when you’re done!” yells a front receptionist making you roll your eyes. You click on a button on the phone and speak loudly, “On my way down.”

And that’s how the rest of the evening was. Taking calls, making dates for meetings, working on three different presentations, and making sure other staff were aware of the upcoming work. Your stomach grumbled as a reminder you had not ate but you ignored it until you clocked off of work.

On your way back home you went grocery shopping, even picking out a bouquet of flowers, and picking up takeout as you weren’t in the mood to cook. After arriving home you placed the items in their correct spots and drank water. You ate Chinese food, sitting on the couch watching TV. Your doorbell rang so you stood up and opened the door, only to be met with Mason who had his arm propped against the doorway.

“We weren’t done talking just yet Y/n…”

small cliffhanger… oops? 🙈

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