jtimu

[jtimu]

like ten years ago, i made a silly post about my leopard gecko and someone reblogged it and added their very long and graphic undertale incest mpreg oviposition fanfiction to it while saying my pet had inspired it.

when i told them i found that really disturbing, they freaked out and went on a months' long campaign where they kept trying to suicide bait me.

like three years ago, i posted a stupid text exchange my partner and i had shared and someone reblogged it and added their graphic our flag means death first-time-anal fanfiction to it while saying my relationship inspired it.

when i told them i found that really inappropriate and weird they freaked out then sent multiple people to angrily tell me to delete my reply because they couldn't have known that was weird. then they nuked their blog.

there's no moral to this story. it's just weird that it happened twice.

[jtimu]

How to Emotionally Destroy Readers

✩ Gut-punches are about timing. You don't say “I love you” during the sunset. You say it in the middle of a burning building or right after they stab you.

✩ A single line of dialogue like “you were supposed to come back” hits harder than an entire page of poetic mourning.

✩ Don’t just break their hearts, break their sense of identity. Make them question who they are, what they stand for, and if it was ever worth it (That’s premium pain.)

✩ Let someone be forgiven… but not trusted again. That's the kind of heartbreak that lingers like smoke.

✩ Sometimes the most devastating line is the one they don’t say. Silence is a character too.

✩ Give them a moment of joy. Right before everything falls apart. Hope makes the fall hurt more.

✩ Someone saying “I forgive you” through tears? Powerful. Someone saying “I still love you but I can’t stay”? Absolutely soul-shattering.

✩ If they die, don’t describe the death. Describe the aftermath. The coat left hanging by the door. The mug still on the table. The dog waiting.

[jtimu]

[jtimu]

The author's poorly disguised fetish

The author's proudly displayed fetish

The author's fetish you're pretty sure they don't realise they have

The author's fetish which they're firmly convinced everyone has and is just pretending otherwise

The author's non-sexual special interest which just sounds like a fetish because of their habitually unfortunate phrasing

The fetish the author is making a well-meaning effort to cater to in spite of clearly not understanding it themselves

The author's fetish that never quite makes it into the text because they keep getting sidetracked by the requisite worldbuilding

The author's utterly pedestrian sexual preference which the text treats like a bizarre fetish because they've got shit to work through

The author's seemingly innocuous recurring trope they're going to have a personal revelation about ten years down the road

The author's fetish you missed on a first reading because it's so far out of pocket, it never occurred to you that you could sexualise that

[jtimu]

this is what happens when you buy your latin on temu

Die temu ad die

[jtimu]

Just a sweet, innocent little fic that peu dropped on us and I recorded as soon as I had the house to myself for an hour.

[Podfic] Princess by peu_a_peu (E, 26 minutes)

Harry figured he would spend the weekend playing with himself.

(okay no but really don't just put this on with your kids in the car, maybe wait until you have headphones on.)

[jtimu]

Why the fuck are you 30+ on tumblr

this is my house?

[jtimu]

i care this silly little guy 🤏🐍

[jtimu]

lying to philoctetes to get his special bow doesn't mean i have no morals. in fact i have more morals than the average person, on account of how i have to change them up for various situations. when society needs an honest man then i'll be one. weirdly that's never happened though

[jtimu]

Laurent in a short short chiton during an official meeting aka Diplomacy ✨

[jtimu]

born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies

[jtimu]

Harry's hear me outs' consisting entirely of his enemies and his godfather.

[jtimu]

Hey there!

I’m opening THIRTEEN Drarry art commission slots to help raise up to $1,000 for school supplies and backpacks for the youth-centered arts nonprofit I help run!

Each commission is $75, and 100% of proceeds go directly toward buying backpacks, notebooks, markers, glue sticks, and other tools of creativity for our upcoming back-to-school event, supporting kids in some of the most underserved neighborhoods in Chicago, from kindergarten through eighth grade.

WHAT YOU’LL GET:

One expressive, full-color digital portrait of Draco and/or Harry based on your headcanon, fic moment, song lyrics, or whatever vibe fuels you!

Follow-up photos of the supplies + joy YOU helped fund!

A custom-designed thank you card!

My eternal gratitude!

NO extra fees for backgrounds/details. NO charges for adding Harry and Draco. Just some super queer art created to your liking for a worthy cause rooted in creativity, community, and care.

I’ll be taking commissions in the order they’re received.

If $75 is too much, please reach out to me. We can work something out! Additionally, if you can give anything, even $5 will help us reach the last stretch of our funding goals to serve over 300 youth at this year's event!

Turnaround time is approx. 2–3 weeks with regular updates and WIPs along the way. For more complex pieces, please expect up to 4 weeks. I love keeping you in the loop!

🔞 Note: I’m not accepting NSFW commissions for this round, but I’m happy to refer you to amazing artists who are!

Check my Ko-fi goal tracker + support or commission me here:

➡️ KO-FI!!!!

DM me on here or on Discord (Trishjames — I’m in the big Drarry server!) to claim your slot or ask questions.

Please reblog to help me reach fellow Drarry lovers, and let’s get these kids ready for school with much needed backpacks and school supplies!

[jtimu]

Harry's hear me outs' consisting entirely of his enemies and his godfather.

[jtimu]

reblog if you're corny and insufferable

[jtimu]

none but the brave

Written for the @drarrymicrofic prompt 'brave'. Filling the following 5 bingo squares: veela, werewolves, Harry POV, idiots in love, 250 words.

It had been different, with Fleur.

He hadn’t felt the compulsion. Not like Ron.

But now, watching Malfoy make his fashionably-late entrance into the pub, all pearlescent skin, hair like moonlight, Harry feels something snap.

Something primal.

He stands up so fast his chair scrapes loudly. Shouldering past a floating tray of firewhisky shots, almost toppling them, he grabs Malfoy’s wrist.

“Malfoy,” Harry says, breathless, “have I ever told you about the time I wrestled a rabid werewolf to the ground with my bare hands?”

“No, you haven't, Potter.” Malfoy's voice lilts, like birdsong, a quivering flute melody. “Because you never did that. You’re on the literal board of the Werewolf Rights charity, you idiot.”

Harry falters. Feels a bit stupid. 

Stupidly in love. 

And Malfoy just isn’t getting it. “I’d protect you!” Harry blurted, “if one ever tried to hurt you. I’d do anything—”

“Yes, yes, you’re terribly brave. Now, snap out of it.” He clicks his fingers, and like that, Harry's mind clears.

“Fuck, sorry about that.” He releases Malfoy's wrist. “I don’t usually fall for the allure.”

Malfoy frowns. “The what?”

“The Veela allure… that activated on your twenty-first birthday?”

“Do you believe every stupid rumour Witch Weekly prints?” Malfoy’s delighted laugh is musical and lovely, and Harry desperately wants to impress him all over again. What the hell—?

“So, wait, you’re not—”

“No, Potter. Now, does this sudden gallantry extend to buying me a birthday drink? Or do I have to fight a werewolf for it?”

[jtimu]

harry/draco | 50 words | @drarrymicrofic prompt: brave

-

Brilliant. Another life debt.

Your memory is back in action for seven seconds before you’re hauling Potter off his near-deathbed to smack him round the head. “Stop. Being. Brave. Your life is worth more than mine!”

Potter has the gall to shrug, eyes ripe with near-death luster. “Not to me.”

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Read on AO3