jtrying2vibe - Tumblr blog

[jtrying2vibe]

This makes so much sense

[jtrying2vibe]

[jtrying2vibe]

[jtrying2vibe]

I’m about to save you thousands of dollars in therapy by teaching you what I learned paying thousands of dollars for therapy:

It may sound woo woo but it’s an important skill capitalism and hyper individualism have robbed us of as human beings.

Learn to process your emotions. It will improve your mental health and quality of life. Emotions serve a biological purpose, they aren’t just things that happen for no reason.

1. Pause and notice you’re having a big feeling or reaching for a distraction to maybe avoid a feeling. Notice what triggered the feeling or need for a distraction without judgement. Just note that it’s there. Don’t label it as good or bad.

2. Find it in your body. Where do you feel it? Your chest? Your head? Your stomach? Does it feel like a weight everywhere? Does it feel like you’re vibrating? Does it feel like you’re numb all over?

3. Name the feeling. Look up an emotion chart if you need to. Find the feeling that resonates the most with what you’re feeling. Is it disappointment? Heartbreak? Anxiety? Anger? Humiliation?

4. Validate the feeling. Sometimes feelings misfire or are disproportionately big, but they’re still valid. You don’t have to justify what you’re feeling, it’s just valid. Tell yourself “yeah it makes sense that you feel that right now.” Or something as simple as “I hear you.” For example: If I get really big feelings of humiliation when I lose at a game of chess, the feeling may not be necessary, but it is valid and makes sense if I grew up with parents who berated me every time I did something wrong. So I could say “Yeah I understand why we are feeling that way given how we were treated growing up. That’s valid.”

5. Do something with your body that’s not a mental distraction from the feeling. Something where you can still think. Go on a walk. Do something with your hands like art or crochet or baking. Journal. Clean a room. Figure out what works best for you.

6. Repeat, it takes practice but is a skill you can learn :)

[jtrying2vibe]

[jtrying2vibe]

Hey, you are not an embarrassment for not knowing how to do certain household chores/basic self-care. They do not come naturally to us. A lot of it takes practice! Maybe you had a neglectful guardian. Maybe you had one that was very coddling and never thought to teach you. Maybe you haven't lived in a place where these things were available to you or needed. Doesn't matter. It's okay to not know and far more common than you might realise.

That said, this website provides very simple instructions on how to do everyday tasks such as making your bed, using a washing machine, cooking different foods, washing dishes, taking a shower, etc. All you have to do is use the search bar to find the task you're struggling with, and it'll come up with what you need + other related how-to's:)

If you're having trouble navigating it, let me provide you with some examples:

How to clean dishes by hand

How to make your bed (with visual demonstrations of each step!)

How to fold clothes (with visual demonstrations of each step!)

How to take a shower & dry yourself off (also provides ways to shave beards, armpits, legs and genitals)

How to shave legs, armpits, beards, pubic areas, etc. (a more in-depth guide)

How to mop the floor

How to sweep the floor

How to swallow pills

How to make small talk

How to make eye contact in different situations (or how to avoid it while still looking natural)

It's also perfectly okay if these don't help or aren't appealing to you. Unfortunately, nothing helps everyone.

[jtrying2vibe]

Questions to Ask When You Have Negative Thoughts

1. What is the evidence that says this thought is true?

2. What is the evidence that contradicts this thought?

3. Where does this thought come from?

4. Who has said this about me in the past?

5. What was their motivation at the time?

6. Should I allow that person to shape my thoughts and life?

7. What is the thought trying to tell me/ make me believe?

8. Why am I allowing limiting thoughts to bring me down?

9. How can I effectively challenge this thought?

10. Am I ready to let this thought or belief go?

11. Am I ready to heal?

12. Will I start this process now?

[jtrying2vibe]

when chappell roan said “you’d have to stop the world just to stop the feeling” and when troye sivan said “give me a call if you ever get desperate” and when renee rapp said “so keep on pretending, pretty girl” and suddenly you’re in seventh grade again in love with a straight girl who never liked you but maybe once she did

[jtrying2vibe]

had a positive weekend and wanted to share: you can do it. you will get through it. no matter how tough it feels, you can do it!

[jtrying2vibe]

collection of useful things tumblr has taught me:

even if you can't fall asleep, laying down with your eyes closed will still rest your body

you don't have to brush your teeth standing up

you don't have to do any chore standing up, from dishes to showering

you don't have to shower with the lights on

if you can't brush your teeth, flossing and a tongue scraper gets rid of plaque and bad breath

if you can't do that, mouthwash kills a lot of bacteria

eating "unhealthy" food is better than eating no food

you can make the same meal everyday for however long you still want it

some pills come in syrups or chewables if you can't swallow them

kids nutritional shakes can be a quick way to get fuel if you can't eat/don't have time

if walking hurts/exhausts you on a regular basis, canes and rollers are for you, no matter how young you are

we have free will—if doing something "out of the ordinary" makes life easier for you, do it

[jtrying2vibe]

sometimes i’m just in awe of how beautiful humans are.

the way we love so deeply with our hearts.

the way we care.

the way we’re always there.

the way we have empathy.

love—platonic, romantic, or any form—is so beautiful and i’m just in awe :)

[jtrying2vibe]

ten years ago you were so scared of such different things, but you survived them anyway. the same goes for five years ago and two years ago. everything that has ever felt like a hurdle, you’ve passed through. so be afraid, identify your fears, and then allow yourself to remember that in just a little while, this will be another thing that you have overcome.

[jtrying2vibe]

do it scared. do it vaguely uncomfortable. do it mysteriously damp

[jtrying2vibe]

Lately I’ve been really into being honest to people about my positive feelings towards them. I told my classmate that I’ve admired her creativity from the start and named a project of hers that I loved, and her face lit up! I took the train with a project partner the other day and told her that I always have so much fun with her, and it prompted an entire conversation about the difficulties of graduating from ‘classmates’ to ‘friends’ and both of our insecurities in this regard (and how we’re definitely getting coffee later). I express my gratitude honestly. I say what I feel if I’d be happy hearing it, myself. I remember details so that I can refer to them later. Once you realize how great you can make someone feel, all of those mundane moments become so special. It will maybe even create some lasting connections, something I think we could all use more of.

[jtrying2vibe]

Maturity is when you realize people can't give you what they can't give themselves, so you stop expecting loyalty from people who betray themselves, stop expecting honesty from people who lie to themselves, and stop expecting peace from people who are at war with themselves.

[jtrying2vibe]

I used to hate it when people said the trick was to just do it until ‘do it scared’ started going around, because that’s truly it. Life didn’t start changing until I applied for jobs with one hand in front of my eyes and a trembling hand navigating my computer mouse. Or until I said everything on my mind (in moderation) with my fists clenched and my legs weak. Or until I refused to accept that I’d ‘just’ be shy forever while also kind of being nauseous at the idea of trying to be the opposite. Two things can coexist and that’s exactly the point of believing that you can do anything.

[jtrying2vibe]

you will live and you will say the wrong things and make mistakes and people will love you anyways.