just-a-hazbin-writer

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

It always fascinated me that when trans people took hormones, they. Worked. I mean this PURELY from a biological standpoint. We think of "male" bodies and "female" bodies as so different, but the reality is they just aren't. A human body will know what to do with the tools you give it, even if it's never had those tools before.

Put testosterone in a "female" body, and it'll know how to grow a beard. It just will.

Put estrogen in a "male" body, and it'll know how to form breasts. It just will.

It doesn't matter what the "original" sex was, a human body is a human body and it knows what to do. We were never different. We just think we are because we think it makes more sense. But it doesn't. I make way less sense, actually.

I think that's fascinating and kind of beautiful. Honestly

And I never thought the place to explore this line of thinking thoroughly would be a Hazbin Hotel mpreg fanfiction but HERE WE ARE

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

One thing Hellaverse "critics" don't seem to understand is how much more open us fans would be to genuinely criticizing these shows if their entire community didn't exist.

Like, of course I don't think these shows are perfect, of course there are writing decisions that bother me, of course I could write essays about things I'd love to see improved. But the literal last thing I wanna do is give these "critics" any fuel, so I'd much rather spend my time and energy countering their negativity with positivity.

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

I think the best example of the bad faith approach to Helluva and Hazbin's writing is Stolas saying to Blitz "I DON'T LOOK DOWN ON YOU! When have I ever shown that!?" and people highlight moments of him clearly seeing Blitz as lesser to say the shows writing is bad rather than just assuming that Stolas is being presented as unselfaware and wrong

And Emily saying "How can I spread joy (in heaven) when I know we're bringing misery to innocent people!" and then showing all the horrible things people do in Hell to show the writing being bad rather than just assuming Emily doesn't really understand Hell or the people in it

Like. It's pretty clear what's going on here "Well they didn't SAY that" they don't really have to?

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

Thought this might help others who struggle when writing. I know I get in my head too much.

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

my favorite coworker told me the scenario she thinks of to fall asleep is she stumbles upon a baby sheep and has to raise it and it grows up and she has to shear it and she says she envisions shearing it so carefully that she always falls asleep at that part

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

Another point to the “we need neutral education around pregnancy, not fear mongering” is I just saw a TikTok where someone was joking about being asked if they were pregnant after their hysterectomy and people were in the comments spreading SO MUCH PANIC about abdominal pregnancies after a hysterectomy that the OP had to put a caption saying how astronomically rare that is and removing your uterus is, in fact, an extremely reliable way to prevent getting pregnant, believe it or not

By pretending every single method of birth control is unreliable all you’re doing is making people afraid to have sex, which pushes the puritanical “sex bad” mindset that I thought we all agreed was bad!! What are we doing guys!! Why are you scaring people out of getting hysterectomies!! I mean I think I know why but I’m mad about it

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

** Permission to post it was granted by the artist Do not repost/edit the art without permission Please, support the artist on their pages too **

Artist : とりかご (twitter / IG / bsky)

Source

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

Hazbin, at least for now only with the Pilot and Season 1 out, is so fun to write about because there are so many different interpretations of the characters. Not necessarily OOC, they all feel somewhat plausible. We're for now basically given an archetype of a character and we can go to town!

I personally write Angel and Valentino as two idiots who genuinely fell in love decades ago, and their relationship has slowly started getting toxic. But it's mutually toxic, they are both very dependant on each other and it's not pure love or hate.

Then, I've seen people write them us Angel just being lured in to the promise of fame and safety, and Valentino only caring about Angel because of money, no feelings attached on either end.

I've seen people write Vox as this very shy, very nervous guy, who overcompensates about it by controlling people. While I write him as an asshole because that's how he's been raised – to want more and more.

I write Valentino and Vox as having some romantic attraction towards each other, but it's all buried beneath powerplay and forced trust on the bases "You ruin my career, I'll ruin yours. You bite, I bite, so be careful."

And then I've seen people make Val and Vox absolute adorable lovebirds, both with short fuse so they argue a lot, but they inevitably make up because they are Toxic4Toxic

I write Velvette as a bit insecure and fixing that up with overperforming, while other people just dub her as a self absorbent spoiled young woman.

I've seen the Vees written as just colleague who have sex on occasion as bonding. While I write them as a tight knit family who would kill and die for each other.

There are so many ways you could characterize anyone in Hazbin, and you could never be wrong because we don't have enough information. The writers just have us the blueprints, those skeletons we could flesh out as we will and I love that so so much!

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

"I am Worm Horse, and I... I am sad."

"Why are you sad, Worm Horse?" "Because! I have no legs!"

"Oh... Well that's okay!"

"I lost my legs in the war!" "(gasp) The war?!"

"Yes! The great pirate war!" "No. No pirates."

"The great pirate war!" "If you keep talking about pirates, I will punch you."

...

"I fought bravely, but I could not run fast enough-"

"They took my legs! There was blood everywhere!"

"Oh no, ew, no blood! Blood is disgusting!" "No? It's cool! (laughing)"

"Well, Banana Pudding is here to save the day!"

"With his magical feet he dances around with, he will dance all over Worm Horse and make him feel better!"

"And then... There will be more blood!"

Please leave Worm Horse alone, he doesn't need more blood. :((

I know the Worm Horse comparison/foreshadowing has been pointed out a million times before, but I love it (and hate it) so much that I had to do this. Here's to hoping there will not actually be more blood for Worm Horse.

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

there are people with genders you will never comprehend and people fucking in ways you will never understand and people making art you just don't get and that shit RULES

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

Fucking hate watching children go “um Actually UwU” about AO3. saw someone say that fixing a bug with bookmarks isn’t a good reason to close a site down for a couple hours and they’re all lying about what they spend money on

meanwhile this very week my actual day job shut down the internal programmes for idk how many hours to fix a minor bug that popped up out of nowhere. I mean??? I don’t know shit about IT but “shut down all functions while we fix a problem” is so damn common. And “oh this took longer than we said” as well.

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

Before I knew I was bisexual I was just insanely dramatic and weird around guys I liked. I had a crush on this guy in my ward - he was older than me, he played bagpipes and had a cheerful dog and an old Volkswagen bus that he worked on all the time. He also had nice scruff and unnaturally attractive hands and a good sense of humor, so I was like FULLY smitten.

I talked about him a lot and about how he was just so dang COOL, dang it, because he was so frickin’ cool. And I really liked him. I thought he was funny and smart and interesting and cool and fascinating and a bunch of other weird feelings I barely had the attention span to think about (I think my ADHD may have prevented me from coming out for a while tbh).

One day, I’m like 14-15, his dad is called to be my Sunday School teacher. His dad is this ex-military hardass with a chip on his shoulder for absolutely no reason and unattainable standards for his children. He spent most of Sunday School talking shit about his eldest boy and how he was rebellious and didn’t listen to him and how that was going to make him a bad adult and a bad son forever. How his son was too lazy and unmotivated to be successful because he didn’t listen to his advice on how to read the scriptures. He complained about how our generation was too weak to do things right and that our generation would surely be the one that brought the world’s downfall because of our laziness and sin.

And like, first of all, that guy can already go fuck himself for that. To clarify, that’s already stupid. BUT. He was talking about the man I had uncomfortable dreams about at least once a month. I couldn’t stand it. I’d get so mad I’d go home shaking sometimes because how fucking DARE he insult his hardworking stunning son by calling him lazy? For not reading the Bible the way his dad wants? When he’s already spending his time learning bagpipes? And fixing cars? And being cool? And cute? Who the fuck even cares if he uses the footnotes in the Book of Mormon? Who gives a rotten rat’s ass if he doesn’t use the scripture study manual his dad uses? He’s so cool he doesn’t even need it? So fuck off?

And eventually I got fucking Sick Of It and decided to mutiny. And by mutiny, I mean skip class. I’d just not go. And after a bit, adults started noticing and bugging me about it. At first, this was put off by small talk and excuses, but as my absence from Sunday School became more well-known, my excuses began to be rejected.

“Oh, Lizard, why aren’t you in class?” Uhm idk because my Sunday School teacher is mean to his kid and that makes me so mad wtf do you want from me? 🫠🤔

“Where’s your class, I’ll go with you!” Oh no ty I’d rather peel my own eyes than have my taste in men critiqued tyty 🩷

“Lizard, you should go to class, I’m sure they miss you!” And I miss the innocent days where my stomach didn’t hurt when a cool boy I knew was being belittled but unfortunately for us both those days are LONG gone and all that’s left is a budding psychosexual clusterfuck that will render me almost fully incapable of functioning for the better part of a decade so Bye Bye, sister Smith 🙂‍↕️

It had gotten to the point that ward leadership was involved. I was being approached by members of the Young Men’s presidency and the Bishopric to try and make me to back to class. They were telling me God had told them to find me and instruct me on my rebelliousness. This is where I implemented my secret weapon - women. Mormons are weird as hell about a lot of things, but especially about women. And I was GREAT with women. So to combat the leadership’s attention, I started helping women.

Our ward had a lot of new moms with babies who were, as babies tend to be, fussy. But for Mormon women the church is often their only social outlet, so they try to power through as long as they can even if it means enduring the exhausting ordeal of taking care of a fussy baby at church.

For what it’s worth, I have a lot of sway with babies. I got baby street cred. Me and babies have a rapport. I have always known this. I have always loved this. And in this crucial gay time in my faggot life my baby mind powers came in clutch - Every time I saw a member of the bishopric getting close, or a young men’s leader giving me side-eye, I’d start walking slowly towards class, passing by relief society. I’d wait until a mom’s baby had gotten too fussy and needed to leave the room, and I’d swoop in like a knight. “Oh, don’t you worry sister, I’ll bounce him a bit. You go back and hang out with your friends in class. You deserve a break.”

If it was a diaper change or something they’d tell me no. But if it was just some good old-fashioned baby fusses, I mean, they’d be moved almost to tears. They just got their social time back AND a free babysitter who is renowned as the Baby Whisperer. And because I was holding a baby as a favor for someone else, I of course could not reasonably be bothered to return to class.

So just like that, I was out of everyone’s sights. This went on for about a month before the straw that broke the camel’s back, which was that without my class participation the classes were quiet and awkward. I’d often take the brunt of Sunday school lectures by answering questions impulsively and over explaining myself enough that the clock could run out without anyone needing to do or say much. My absence meant everyone else was getting hit with the full unpleasantness of this guy’s bullshit. And so slowly, one-by-one, I had a group of about 8 kids on baby-holding duty. These new moms were so overjoyed, they and their husbands were both so actively in our corner that now chastising us was untenable. Now we had bargaining power. So the Bishopric approached us, confused beyond confused and uncomfortable beyond uncomfortable, and said,

“What’s it gonna take to get you back to class?”

The POWER I possessed in that moment was addictive. By being kind to the women of the ward and ignoring the Mormon de facto Rule of Law of following rules en-masse so the rule breakers feel left out, there were now so many people breaking ranks that we had effectively enacted a church boy labor strike. And they crumbled so fast it was almost like we had swayed God himself to our cause.

“I want brother assholedad gone. He sucks at teaching.”

I didn’t even have to say it. One of my rebels said it for me. I just nodded sagely and said “Yes, his class is not edifying. It’s better to not go and hold babies.”

And just like that, with a snap of my limp-wristed, Christ-wounding, bottom-brained fingers my faggot will was enacted. God’s revelation that brother shitdad was his chosen Sunday school teacher flipped on a dime. Suddenly brother shitdad was asked to be an usher and the fun dad of another one of my crushes was called in to teach us. I still stayed to hold babies a lot, but the rest of the class returned and all was well again.

Although I didn’t recognize it then, I think that was a formative moment for me in a lot of ways. I learned that being really persistently annoying will get me what I want from authority eventually. I learned that God’s will can be swayed by going in strike. I learned that ignoring men’s made up authority forces them to level with you as a person. I learned that caring for women, especially vulnerable women, can make a whole world happier. I learned that letting women rest can help them feel more love for the things that matter in their life. I learned that social bonds make everyone stronger and happier. And I learned that loving others in a gay way can change the world.

Be gayer. Read Terry Pratchett. I love y’all 💕

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

Vox fans are gonna be in the TRENCHES fighting for their lives come season 2.

I believe in you guys, your ships will sail, you will prevail!

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

Trump is not President.

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

[just-a-hazbin-writer]

people without any whimsy scare me. why are you like that. where are your trinkets.