justaspecter

[justaspecter]

I ran out of ideas filling the remaining spaces. Drew this out of the whim and just winged it. Please ignore the ugly rat tail maggot.

[justaspecter]

Just for fun. Because I can't focus on my wip. And I badly need to progress to see an actual improvement.

Anyway this was some random headcanon for Marco the Phoenix that's been uselessly stored in my brain and docx.

Marco was renowned mother hen in the whitebeard pirate not just because of his crew agonizing the zoan commander but because of his actions speak for him. Especially when their Pops' (captain) health was slowly deteriorating because of old age. He wouldn't mind taking charge and chastising most of his misbehaving brothers.

But there were rare times when he could be the bastard antagonizing the crew when he felt the spur of childish spontaneity in him. Even in his age and being a veteran he wouldn't hesitate brewing some mischief on random nice days. 

Marco had a different type for being a menace with his brothers, if Thatch and Ace being the pranksters of the ship. Him and Izou thrived through drama. But Marco had a different thing going with him. Whenever there's an argument and the debate was going on for ages before the fight finally ensues, bet with all your money this guy would throw a comment about 'who says who' just like talking about the damn weather. And since he was known for his reputation, every idiot brother of his would believe him. He always had gasoline(information) fueling the fire(argument) further. 

This birdy likes to eavesdrop, but in his defense he was just taking tabs. Oh, he likes keeping tabs, keeping tabs for blackmail materials in the future. 

Speaking of eavesdropping it's not like he was actively snooping, he could be walking around the corner or pass some specific corridors and room, when familiar hushes piqued his sense of hearing that made him stop. And the unsuspected victims didn't know what's coming when those hush conversations were now committed in his memory. 

You thought the secret you shared with your buddy was just exchanged between the two of you? Oh, no, you should always consider a plus one when on the Moby. 

At some point he could be a cctv just silently observing in the sidelines. He enjoyed unnerving most of his brothers with how he watched them behind their backs totally unaware (it's his birdbrain kicking in). But when they turned around he would play it cool by acting laid back just passing by or pretending he was napping, until he felt like being a shit giving those unfortunate souls a goodhearted closed eye smile.

Only it's not too goodhearted when he began walking towards them and they would be reminded they were in for some crazy punishment for getting busted. Skipping chores were no longer a good idea when the first commander stared at them in his harpy form, sharp talons glinting menacingly(for intimidation purposes only no brothers were harmed). 

Ever heard the phrase, "sleep like a chicken"? That's literally his sleep cycle, a good hour of naps to get him through the day and night. He was either diurnal or nocturnal so his sleep patterns could be kinda wack. He sleeps when drowsiness finally kicks in. 

Sometimes he naps on certain areas in his phoenix form, just don't dare disturb him or lay a hand when you see a blue glowing flame bird perched on the beams or the crow nest. Don't want to get kicked and squawked by a very angry flaming bird. His favorite place to take those sleep was on his Pops' shoulder. 

If he had a s/o he would definitely try resting on top of their shoulders instead, if they managed to gain his trust. He would sleep on them and didn't care if he would be an absolute menace by using both of his companion's shoulders like a personal platform. And it didn't matter if they were busy, the man needed his sleep so better drop whatever you were doing because it's nap time. 

Marco was social but he would prefer to listen (again his eavesdropping tendencies). Although he was known for being the main instigator of drama in the ship, while Izou being the deliverer of the said drama most of the time, Marco could keep a secret quite well. 

Most nights if he wasn't occupied with his work, he would write in his journal about his recent adventures. It's his way of practicing his calligraphy, sometimes when creativity hits him he would write short piece of poetry, he wasn't good but he still dedicated a page in his journal with few stanzas of the poem with drawings and doodles in the background. 

[justaspecter]

There's an angel with black wings—an outcast among the pure-white ones. So they plucked each of the black feathers, planted it onto their pale skin, painting the white with blood and black. They cut the bones of their wings, shaved it til it formed into an horn.

And maybe that's how the devils were born.

[justaspecter]

Our everyday that is only exposed and decays

will become history once we notice it.

That’s so scary and I can’t take it!

In the end, we’re losers.

Yama - Running Out

[justaspecter]

How am I still alive? When I'm choking from all the words stuck in my throat and drowning in my own unshed tears, along with the blood from biting my tongue. As if the mask isn't suffocating enough on my face.

[justaspecter]

Happy asexual awareness day from your local autochorrisexual

[justaspecter]

[justaspecter]

I know people love to think of ADHD as just “haha fun disorder” and being distracted and ditzy. But neurotypical people will never know the legitamate stress and pain of losing track of items in seemingly a second, all day, every day. 

I set down my phone? It’s gone. I spend twenty minutes looking for it while on the border of tears because I just want my phone. It’s on a shelf three feet away, I can’t see it. I can’t trust myself to keep track of anything. I see a text? It’s gone the second I look away. I ghost someone for days and every time I remember I feel terrible.

It’s incredibly stressful! I know it’s easy to reduce something to simple terms, but please remember that it isn’t that simple. ADHD effects a persons life every waking moment. Lets not dimish the impacts. 

[justaspecter]

I wish they taught a class on what being a normal human is like

Like, the normal amount of pain is zero. The normal amount of wishing you weren't ever born is zero. Food isn't supposed to itch or hurt*. Going numb (any time outside sitting in one position too long) isn't normal. Passing out isn't normal. Normal people take like 10-20 minutes to fall asleep, and sleep like 6-9 hours. You're supposed to get one period a month, which is manageable with a few tampons or pads a day and lasts 3-6 days.

These are all things I had to find out later, like a moron.

(fibromyalgia, depression, allergies, cataplexy, narcolepsy, PCOS and endometriosis)

*spicy food is supposed to hurt?

[justaspecter]

I'm tired of this so called 'living'.

[justaspecter]

If drowning kills—why, oh why am I still alive.

[justaspecter]

saw this cute crochet pattern and thought awww baby phoenix...need to be blue

sooo I made my self a little pineapple birb :3

i'ts a wip so..finished baby phoelix coming soon

[justaspecter]

First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die

How you dying 👀

[justaspecter]

I'm just done with my latest binge-reading of unfinished fanfic. Once again I don't know what to do with myself.

[justaspecter]

Writing advice that changed my sentence

When I was a young writer, I was told that I often started my sentences with "there is/there was/there are." I was told to eliminate those as much as possible.

I couldn't believe how often I used them. My first novel was completely littered with them.

I learned to diversify and grow my use of verbs. Instead of the state-of-being verbs, like "is" which isn't very descriptive at all, I started using stronger verbs.

Instead of writing "There were a bunch of trees on the hill" I wrote "A cluster of trees towered over the hill."

"Towered" is a much stronger verb than "Is"

Use the state-of-being words, but if you can, try replacing them with more active verbs. You might be surprised how much your writing improves.

[justaspecter]

what i could never confess without some bravado by emily palermo // a song for a lover of long time ago - bon lver // lies about sea creatures by ada limón //cassandra: a novel and four essays by christa wolf // the next time we talk on facebook by clementine von radics // i bet on losing dogs - mitski // unknown

[justaspecter]

— Clarice Lispector, from “Report on the Thing.”