kammons-2019 - Tumblr blog

[kammons-2019]

[kammons-2019]

It’s weird. It’s weird how you have the same face but you’re a completely different person. It’s weird how I have so many amazing memories with you but they died off as you’re a completely different person. It’s weird that I’m mourning over someone that is still alive because you’re a completely different person. It’s weird, you’re a completely different person.

- @spilled-thouqhts via Tumblr

[kammons-2019]

“Ten years from now, make sure you can say that you chose your life, you didn’t settle for it.”

— Mindy Hale

[kammons-2019]

Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My god, do you learn.

[kammons-2019]

I want us to make each other better.

- someone you should probably hold on to

[kammons-2019]

I refuse to chase anyone anymore.

[kammons-2019]

And then suddenly I become sad for no reason, and it takes me days to get over that feeling.

[kammons-2019]

[kammons-2019]

You tell yourself not to think of him yet, you still do and you’re wondering if he’s thinking about you too.

[kammons-2019]

Sometimes your heart needs more time to accept what your mind already knows.

[kammons-2019]

“You can tell so much about a person by the way they leave you”

— Redvers Bailey

[kammons-2019]

“Take a shower, Wash away the bad thoughts, Cleanse your body, Put on some relaxing music, Get in to bed, Breathe.”

—

[kammons-2019]

“You should know, if you never open up you’re never going to heal.”

— Ned Vizzini, It’s Kind of a Funny Story

[kammons-2019]

Yeah, I still love you. And I still miss you so fckin much. Your eyes, your voice, your kisses, the way you held my hand, the way you looked at me every single day, our night calls and deep conversions about life, how we were used to be together every second we could. I miss these days, when we were together, watching stars quietly or you just looked into my eyes and I forgot to breathe. You kissed me all the time and it was so perfect. That smile you gave me even when you were down. I love you and I’ll always keep you in my heart. Even when I’m in another relationship, I’m still thinking about you. You’re my whole world, so please, come back. I tried, I tried really hard, but I can’t ever forget you. I need you in my life and I feel lost without you. Like half of me was missing and I can’t get over it, cause it still hurts so hard.

[kammons-2019]

“So, do it. Decide. Is this the life you want to live? Is this the person you want to love? Is this the best you can be? Can you be stronger? Kinder? More compassionate? Decide. Breathe in. Breathe out and decide.”

— Meredith Grey (via thegoodvybe)

[kammons-2019]

When I first met him, he was the most beautiful thing ever. His little freckles. His beautiful brown eyes. Even his little gap between his teeth. His laugh was the best. He would look at me while I was driving and just tell him how beautiful I was. I didn’t have to try. Even with my hair up and big t-shirt on, he’s wanted to take a picture. He wouldn’t stop telling me how beautiful I was to him. He made me feel like the luckiest person in the world. In my head, I was like, this can’t be real, to meet someone so perfect, so wonderful. He would buy me Spongebob or The office things, because he knew they were my favorite. He listened to me, encouraged me to be me. He really, truly was my best friend. I loved him, oh did I ever love him. I could stare at him all day and never get tired of it. I loved being in his arms, I could’ve stayed there forever, but then he left. He left without a word. He left without a reason. He left. My heart has never felt the way it did when he left me. And he showed a side that I never even knew he had. He took all the insecurities and struggles I trusted him with, and used them against me. He made me look crazy. He made me look like the bad guy. He didn’t even seem the least bit sad. I saw him in the hallways in school, and he just looked at me, standing there, while I was crying my eyes out, I could barely breathe. He looked at me, and walked the other way. He began to avoid me on his way to class. He got others to call me names. I lost my friends. That reputation I had, he ruined. And it’s not the fact he did that, it’s the fact that it was all a lie. I felt like I was screaming and no one heard me. He broke me. He made me feel worthless. There was a point where the bullying, the heartbreak and all that he caused, took over and I just wanted to take my life. But he thought of it as a joke, as did everyone else. I didn’t eat for awhile. Anything I had made me feel sick. It’s been about a year. I haven’t heard a word from him. I guess it was all fake. I guess you were a better actor than I thought. A year later, I’m healing and finally able to put this in my past, but I still don’t get it. And sometimes I wish I did. I finally see you weren’t the one. What you did was evil, selfish, and cruel. And I’m glad it’s over, but here’s what else I know. I truly loved you. I wanted to marry you. Everything was genuine from me. Why did you do what you did. Why did you hurt me so bad. Why did you never check on me or give me a truthful reason of why you left. I don’t think I’ll ever talk to you again, maybe that’s a good thing, but I’ll always wonder, why, why did you do any of this.

Because you weren’t the person you claimed to be.

[kammons-2019]

Worth.

Freakin crazy I let you break me! Not only did you know about all the crap I’ve faced, and not only did you dump me because you’re a scared lil pussy, but you intentionally made sure you hit me in every insecurities I struggled with. My man, you’re evil. You never deserved me, my time, or my love. Mad at myself at the fact that it took so long to see everything for how it really was, but just glad I finally saw through it.