The End of All Things - REWRITE
On July 6th, 2018, I succumbed to some self indulgence. Six years later, let's do it again.
Featuring @deltheor 's Sydney ~
Pongo knew.Â
The official BLADE report never made it into the public eye, but he knew Elma, and Elma knew everything, so he got the information out of her. While Pongo had been out on a forced vacation, Sydney had Brainjacked seventy percent of NLAâs population and had taken them to Cauldros, where heâd set himself up in a Ganglion fortress to play the role of false king. Elma showed him the witness reports, people recounting being controlled, people recounting their efforts to stop him. An elite team of Brainjack users were able to take him down, in the end, but even that almost hadnât been enough.Â
The rumors spread like a disease throughout NLA. He still walks among us, Pongo once heard. Heâs been stripped of his rank, so hopefully he wonât be allowed anywhere near a knife again. I saw him in the residential district once - do you think heâs planning how to do it again?
It hurt. The rumors had nothing to do with Pongo, yet he still felt their sting. He could only imagine how deeply it was affecting Sydney.
In the end, the rumors and the official reports combined were enough for Pongo to make a decision.Â
He pulled out his comm device and called Sydney just after noon. Someone had given Pongo his number a long time ago, long enough that Pongo couldnât quite remember who it was. Sydney didnât respond. Frantic, Pongo kept dialing and calling, dialing and calling, dialing and calling, come on Sydney why wonât you pick up -
âThe fuck do you want?!â
And suddenly, everything Pongo had planned to say vanished into thin air. Gods above, Sydneyâs anger was something to behold. Pongo knew he had to be quick, or Sydney would hang up.Â
âH-Hi, Sydney,â Pongo started. âWe, umâŠwe need to talk.â
âWeâre talking right now, dipshit.â
Damn it. Damn him. Pongo released a shaky breath, trying to keep himself composed. âI meant in person. This is not something I can talk to you about over the comm device.â
âIâm busy. You should spit it out and stop wasting my time -â
âNot over the comm device.â
Pongo hadnât meant for his tone to get so strained, so forceful. Sydney didnât respond immediately, and he almost wondered if the (former?) Interceptor had hung up after that little outburst. However, after a moment of silence, he got a response.
âAlright, fine. When would you like to plan our little date?â
Pongo swallowed hard. No, Pongo, it is not a date. Do not get your hopes up. He shook his head, then responded, âWell, umâŠdo you know of that elevator by the West Gate? The one that leads to the very top of the walls of NLA?â
The location held many good memories for Pongo; that was the same elevator heâd taken down to the Industrial District, the very first time heâd stepped foot into the city. Back then, he had no idea who he was, or who he was meant to be. In recent months Pongo found himself revisiting the location, if only to reminisce on the past. Others had called this insight into himself and the hearts of others a blessing, and perhaps he could use this talent toâŠwell. To see Sydney.
âI know the place,â Sydney said, again knocking Pongo out of his stray thoughts.Â
âWould you be able to meet me there tonight? Maybe around eight?â Pongo asked.
âSure, I guess. See ya then.â
âRight,â Pongo said, but the dial tone hit his ears before he had gotten his full response out. With a sigh, his hand lowered, and pressure built behind his eyes. Shoving his comm device in his back pocket, he looked to the horizon. The sun was high above him, a promise that the day was still young. It would be a painful wait until the appointed hour arrived.
~
Pongo found himself waiting at the bottom of the elevator fifteen minutes before eight. This corner of the city was quieter than he expected, but then again, this was the Industrial District. Outfitters, arms manufacturers, and construction workers hurried about the district in a mad frenzy. The chaos usually calmed his nerves; he felt at home in the hustle and bustle, the high energy that came with BLADEâs intellectual conquests. Yet tonight, as heâd been walking towards the meeting point, Pongo had briefly considered getting a drink at the Repenta Diner. Frye had once told him that spiking a coffee wasnât out of the ordinary, and Pongo had seen first-hand how alcohol soothed aching hearts.
This was something he needed to be sober for, though, so in the end, Pongo had gotten a water from the diner. Heâd nursed it in his hands and had taken two sips before discarding the cup. He wish heâd kept it now, as he had nothing to do with his hands aside from wringing them together. Sweat built beneath his palms, the friction of his gloves providing some level of distraction from his own thoughts. Funny, how he allowed himself to feel this. Funny, how it didnât serve to distract him from the truth.
âPongo? Helloooo? Anybody home in there?â
Pongo blinked a few times, and when he regained focus, he saw Sydney standing right in front of him. How long had he been standing there?! Gods above, Pongo was out of it, huh? He could even smell Sydneyâs cologne - it was one of his favorites. Jasmin, saffron, cedarwood. An expensive blend. Pongo stepped back, his heart fluttering under his chest.
He did not wear this for you. Stop it.
âH-Hi,â Pongo stammered, âsorry about that, I justâŠâ
âLost in your own head?â Sydney guessed, raising one of his pierced eyebrows in annoyance. âHappens, I guess.â
âRight. Yeah,â Pongo grinned sheepishly, finally making eye contact with Sydney. What was the human saying again, something about eyes being windows to the soul? If that was the case, Pongo could see through Sydney, and in that brief moment, he saw the truth. Sydney was happy to see him.
That made Pongo want to cry.
âSo whatâs so important that you couldnât tell me through comms, huh?â Sydney asked. âYouâre an old-fashioned fucker if you prefer talking to people in person.â
âThen call me old-fashioned, I suppose,â Pongo laughed nervously, âI, umâŠI think this is going to be too important for comm messages, is all.â
âGuess Iâll be the judge of that,â he huffed, âso get on with it. I donât have all night.â
Right, he said he was busy. Pongo needed to get to the point. But at the same time, BLADEs were flying past them both, some casting looks over their shoulders. Damn it, he shouldâve thought about how busy itâd be here.
âWe should find somewhere quieter,â he suggested, expecting some form of backlash.
To his surprise, however, Sydney shrugged. âWhatever floats your yacht.â
âI do not own a yacht.â
â...Iâll rent you one of mine, sometime. Maybe Iâll throw in a one percent discount on the rental fee, too.â
Pongoâs eyes started to sting as he held back tears. The offer sounded so genuine, so real. Do not get your hopes up.Â
âI would like that,â he said softly, feeling his heart begin to rip itself apart. He turned away from Sydney before he could say anything else.
Pongo stepped onto the elevator platform, using the controls to send it to the top floor after Sydney had embarked. It was a long way to the top, so once the elevator fence came up and they began to ascend, Pongo found himself sneaking a glance at Sydney. He was facing away, observing the city below. It was an array of colors and lights under the darkened sky, replacements for the stars that didnât shine that night. Sydneyâs head turned slightly, and Pongo could see those same lights reflected in his eyes. What a vibrant red they were, the color of power and blood and undying strength.Â
Red, the color of love.
The first tear fell. Pongo wiped it away with the back of his glove, wincing when he pulled his arm back. Heâd done it too rough, and now his cheek hurt. Not enough to leave a bruise, but enough to leave a memory.
The elevator came to a stop at the top floor. Pongo stepped out once the railings came down without acknowledging Sydney. He came to rest his arms on the fencing along the platform, staring down at NLA. This was where Elma had taken him when heâd first entered the city, when Pongo was unsure about who and what he was. There was a kind of poetic satisfaction in returning here, a satisfaction in knowing that he had found himself.Â
ThoughâŠhad he?
No. Pongo wasnât here to throw himself a pity party. Just push the feelings down, as you always have and always will.
âSoâŠâ Sydney said, leaning back on the railing to Pongoâs right, âwhat do you want?â
Pongo didnât realize he was holding his breath until he let it go in a shaky exhale. Maybe he could save himself. Maybe he could find a silly excuse and have Sydney get mad at him for wasting his time. Maybe he could find another way to get the answers he needed.Â
But he couldnât do any of that in good conscience. He had to face this - and so did Sydney.
âElma gave me access to the BLADE reports,â he finally said. âThey, umâŠyou Brainjacked over seventy percent of the population.â
Silence. Pongo didnât have the strength to look up at Sydney, to gauge his reaction through his facial expressions. Yet the air shifted, a tension that was nearly unbearable. Pongo opened his mouth, too uncomfortable to remain quiet, but Sydney beat him to the punch.
âYeah. Yeah, I did.â
A confession. Pongo gazed upwards at that, finding that Sydney had turned around to assume the same position as him. He was staring out at the city lights, his brow furrowed. From the profile, he lookedâŠ
He looked sad.
That was what Pongo had been searching for. That was the answer he needed.Â
âAre you okay?â he asked.
âIâm fine,â Sydney spat out in response.
âSydney -â
âIâm fine,â he repeated, sharper this time, âwhy do you even care?â
Because I care about you.
He couldnât say that. He shouldnât.
âBecause Elma also told me you suffered some kind of amnesia afterwards,â Pongo answered, âthat you did not remember most of the time in Cauldros. It justâŠfrom everything I heard, I do not think that the one who Brainjacked everyone was truly you.â
âThe fuckâs that supposed to mean?â Sydneyâs voice rose, âOf course it was me!â
âNo, no, Sydney, listen to me, that was not you -â
âSHUT UP!!â
Pongo flinched back at Sydneyâs order. Sydneyâs eyes were glazed over, tears trailing down his cheeks. He hunched over to hide his face, an ugly sob emanating from the back of his throat. It took every bit of willpower to resist rushing forward, to resist wrapping him up in a hug, to resist telling him that everything would be alright.Â
I will not be able to let go if I hold him now.
âI donât even know why you wanted to see me,â Sydney nearly shouted as he straightened his spine, spinning around to finally face him. âYou know what I did. The entire fucking city knows what I did, but I donât even fucking remember what happened. What, did you wanna point and laugh at the asshole who ruined lives for shits and giggles?!â
âIt was not you,â Pongo pleaded, unable to hold back his own tears.
âThen who the fuck do you think I am, huh?! Who are you to tell me who I am and what Iâm capable of?! Iâm a fucking monster -â
âYou are not a monster!!â Pongo cried, âYou are not the same person as the one who Brainjacked the city!!â
âOooh, so that was a fucking clone who did that, then?!â Sydney retorted, âAnswer the fucking question, asshole - who am I?!â
Pongo swallowed hard, forcing himself to stare into Sydneyâs eyes. His makeup was starting to smear, a black tar staining his cheeks. As Pongo spoke, his voice rose, gaining more and more strength.
âYou act vain and narcissistic and you hardly care about anyone other than yourself. You buy things because you think it makes you happy, but you are never happy, because you think you are undeserving of everything you have been given. You act as though you only care about yourself because you do not want anyone showing you the slightest hint of compassion, and it is because you are terrified, Sydney, you are terrified of being loved because you think you do not deserve it, but damn it Sydney you do!!â
âI donât deserve shit,â Sydney faltered, but now Pongo was shouting, now he felt too deeply.
âYES YOU DO!! Are you living?! Breathing?! Then you deserve someone who loves you, someone who will be there for you through thick and thin, someone who sees past all of your flaws and sees you for your heart!! Fucking hell, Sydney, I lo-â
He caught himself.Â
âI know you deserve to be loved because I know you are a good person deep down!! Everyone deserves to be loved no matter how many times they have fucked up, and I will not sit back and watch you believe you are undeserving, because YOU ARE!!â
Pongoâs voice was cracking, a mirror to his heart. His breaths deep and painful, he stepped back, hitting the rail. The metal provided a cool sensation against his hands, welcome in the heated moment. Sydney looked shellshocked, eyes wide and unblinking. Pongo had never seen this expression before, and despite his fury, the sight made him near-nauseous. He had to close his eyes, a gentle breeze finally coming to soothe him, caressing the hair sticking to his face.
âThe fact of the matter is that you have changed,â Pongo quietly said, controlling how his voice shook. âYou put on the same act as before, but deep downâŠI see you, Sydney. I do.â
Silence, eternal. Pongo sighed. He couldnât stay here. He couldnât keep doing this. Getting attached, getting his heart broken when there was nothing left to break.Â
âI am sorry if you had somewhere else to be,â he apologized, âI got my answer. I will leave you alone, if that is what you want.â
Pongo let go of the railing, straightening his spine and turning back towards the elevator. The silence remained deafening, and his thoughts raced to devour it whole. His own voice echoed in his ears, remnants of his anger, reflections of his soul. The anger was not towards Sydney, he concluded quickly, but rather towards himself. How could Pongo have been so stupid, to get this close to Sydney? The happy-go-lucky Interceptor with a heart of gold, with friends in every corner of the city and beyond, a man who dreamed and hoped and wished for more. That was selfish. That was greedy. That was wrong. He wasnât allowed to wish for a deeper connection because he was destined to love and never be loved in return. That was his punishment, his sentence, his -
A hand, quickly grasping his. Metal under his skin. A whisper, a plea in the dark.Â
âDonât go.â
Pongo wasnât strong enough to keep his gaze fixed forward. He looked to Sydney, to the quivering form that had stopped him from leaving. He was a shell - or perhaps, this was the original Sydney, the one who was showing his true colors after years and years of hiding in plain sight. And his true colors were beautiful in every sense, vibrant red and gold and white. His palm pressed in Pongoâs own was a dream, a hope, a wish come true.Â
Pongo looked down at their intertwined hands. He couldnât. He couldnât.
And yetâŠ
Could he allow himself to be selfish, just this once?
He didnât give himself enough time to answer that question. Pongo brought Sydney closer, wrapping his other hand around the back of Sydneyâs neck, pulling him in, in, in - and their foreheads touched, skin upon skin. Pongo forced himself to keep the space between their mouths, though he cherished the small contact made between their noses. Do not get closer, he told himself, his last shred of control.Â
But the little voice in the back of his mind, once smothered, echoed out. You are allowed to want this.Â
His resolve finally shattered.
âOkay,â Pongo breathed. âI am here.â
And he sealed the distance between their lips.Â
Sydney was wearing lipstick, Pongo discovered, and he wondered if this sudden kiss would smudge it. It would certainly appear on Pongoâs mouth, and he battled with whether or not that was a point of excitement or defeat. He tilted his head ever so slightly, adjusting so he didnât aggravate Sydneyâs piercings. Sydneyâs cologne overwhelmed him, that same mix of jasmin, saffron, cedarwood. Pongo could drink deep of it and never be satisfied.Â
But he pulled away, eventually - after he realized that Sydney was not reciprocating the kiss. Pongo didnât meet Sydneyâs gaze, everything crashing down on him all at once. He had to say something. He had to come up with an excuse. This is the end of everything. You never deserved to get this close, and now you have to pay for it.Â
âI am so sorry,â Pongo whispered, âI should haveâŠI should have asked first. I know this would not work, but I just...â
He wiped his tears from his face, turning away. His heart had skipped several beats, and he wasnât sure why the air suddenly felt so heavy, so constricting. He deserved it, still. He deserved to get smothered in the pain. Friend of the world, closest to none. How could someone like him ever hope for more?
The elevator was enticing, too enticing. But he told Sydney he was here, that heâd stay. The honor took hold of him, so his feet refused to move. Better for him anyways - he had to be here for the fallout, both self-inflicted and external. Gods, he shouldâve left when he had the chance. He shouldâve ripped his hand out of Sydneyâs and spared them both the pain. How deeply, horribly selfish indeed. A hypocrite, a fool, and above all else -
Sydneyâs hands found their way to Pongoâs cheeks and pulled him back in.
There they were, kissing under the moonlit sky. It took Pongo only a moment to recover from the initial shock, and then he crumbled, his defenses completely destroyed. One of Sydneyâs hands shifted backwards, entangling in Pongoâs hair, and the other fell down to cup the space between his neck and shoulder. Pongoâs arms, out of desperation, wrapped themselves around Sydneyâs hips to draw him in closer. He thought this would ground him, but instead he found his thoughts floating in a pastel haze.
Sydney was the first to pull away. Chasing the high, Pongo nearly followed his lips, but as they caught their breath, Pongo couldnât hold back his relief. He laughed, soft and warm, keeping his hands around Sydneyâs waist. Hells, heâd been right before - he couldnât let go, now that heâd taken hold. He didnât even realize he was crying until Sydneyâs thumb came to trace the skin under his eye, wiping away a wet streak of newborn tears.Â
âI donât know what this means,â Sydney whispered. âFor you, for meâŠI donât know what any of this means.â
âIt does not have to mean anything if you do not want it to,â Pongo replied, his smile weak but honest.
âBut I want this to mean something. You deserve that.â
âYou deserve it, too. You always have.â
Sydney swallowed hard. âIâŠI donât know if I believe you, yet. But I want to. Damn, do I want to.â
Pongo didnât respond, but his smile strengthened. He knew Sydney believed that, and heâd do everything he could to prove him right. That he was deserving. That he was loved, loved so much that it hurt.Â
And maybeâŠmaybe Pongo could believe that for himself, too. That he deserved the same.Â
They stared out into the city after that, hand in hand. The silence became their friend.Â
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Santagoâs New Sleigh
Pongo accidentally reveals his secret persona to Fudge a few days before Christmas. What does the Outfitter do? He builds a core component for Santago thatâs been sorely missed.
Featuring @anryl âs Danny and @deltheor âs Sydney, with brief mentions of @skell-pilot-sora âs Ruadha and @stargazer-ele âs Polaris.
âDamn, Pon. Whatever youâre reading, it must be important.â
Pongo squeaked, looking up from his comm device to meet Fudgeâs gaze. Heâd decided to visit Fudgeâs lab, a routine at this point since Fudge had the tendency to lock himself away for days on end working on new inventions. Most often heâd make conversation with the Outfitter as he worked, a measure against Fudgeâs self-inflicted loneliness, but today was not like most days. Pongo had decided to get a headstart on the Christmas list for the year, and instead of using the regular paper, heâd made the transfer over to keeping a digital list on his comm device. After all, the last few times heâd been out in public checking over the paper list, heâd gotten caught and sheepishly had to explain himself. His identity as Santa had to be a secret, after all! Wasnât that the point of being Santa? If everyone knew that he was the one dropping off their gifts, then the magic of Christmas would surely be ruined!
So, with the transfer to a digital list, Pongo was excited to covertly check everything over and make sure heâd gotten all the residents of NLA. Since Fudge was busy building stuff, Pongo didnât think heâd notice or deign to bring it up. When Pongo didnât respond immediately, Fudge raised an eyebrow. He was perched on top of a ladder looking down at Pongo; heâd been working on his Skell and had been too short to reach the back panel behind its face. The height advantage made Pongo feel more than a little exposed, and he had to briefly wonder if Fudge felt like that all the time.Â
âSo? What are you reading?â Fudge probed.
âN-Nothing!â Pongo defended himself, tucking his comm device in his pocket. It was a harder maneuver than he anticipated, considering he was awkwardly seated on what may have possibly been the only clean chair in the entire lab surrounded by spare parts and mechanical debris.Â
âOoh, did you get a text from that rich guy youâre dating?â
âOh, ah, n-no.â
âWaitâŠPongo, are you reading something naughty?â
âWHAT?!â
âIâm just messing with ya,â Fudge cackled, stepping down off of his ladder and approaching Pongo - who, at that moment, was as red as a tomato. âWhatever it is, youâre likeâŠsuper into it. I mean, you didnât hear me ask you if you could hand me a tool before.â
â...RIPS, did he really ask me that?â Pongo mumbled.Â
Fudgeâs AI system responded nearly immediately. âAFFIRMATIVE, MASTER CALDRAVIX. IN FACT, MASTER CARSON ASKED YOU FOR THE SOLDERING IRON TWICE WITHIN THE PAST THIRTY SECONDS.â
âGods above,â Pongo sighed, putting his head in his hands. âSorry, Fudge. You are right, I got distracted.â
âYou still havenât told me what you were reading, though, so now Iâm curious,â Fudge knocked some stuff off of his desk, leaning against the empty space he had created and crossing his arms over his chest. âSpill the beans.â
â...What beans?â
âFucking hell, itâs a saying. Means ya gotta tell the truth.â
âOh, well, umâŠâ Pongo shrank into himself. His hand palmed the pocket containing his comm device despite his uncertainty. Why did it seem like every year, someone new had to learn about his masquerade? And why couldnât he lie?! Seriously, this would be so much easier if he could think of a valid excuse for being distracted, but nothing came to mind. At least it was Fudge and not some stranger, right?Â
With a defeated sigh, Pongo pulled his comm device back out. As it opened back onto the Christmas list, he explained, âIt is the list of gifts for the residents of NLA this year. The songs always say that Santa checks it twice, so I was going through it again to make sure I got everyone.â
âYour list has everyone in the fucking ci - wait a fucking minute,â Fudgeâs eyes widened, his arms falling to his sides. âAre you the fucker that delivers everyoneâs gifts each Christmas?â
âY-Yes,â Pongo admitted.
âHoly shit!! Holy shit,â Fudge exclaimed, slowly becoming more and more excited, âThe Outfitters have tried laying traps for you for years now! They wanted to know who you were so badly! I shouldâve fucking known it was you, only someone like you would be able to pull a stunt like that off every year, you gotta tell me everything about how you operate - are there people that help you behind the scenes? Did you recruit some aprica for your sleigh? Oh fuck, I wonder what your sleigh looks like, I bet itâs a -â
âI do not have a sleigh,â Pongo interjected, âI just use my Skell every year. Eros is able to carry the weight of everything just fine.â
Fudge stopped suddenly. âYou donât have a sleigh.â
âNo?â
â...â
Pongo prepared himself for another rant, a bout of frustration. Fudge was an easy man to annoy, and something about that confession made him feel defenseless. Heâd never really thought about the specifics regarding Santaâs sleigh, taking it as something he could easily swap out and get the same result. But maybe the decision to do so cost him some necessary Christmas magic? As Pongo silently cursed his oversight, Fudgeâs shock slowly turned into something else. Pongo expected a scowl, but he was greeted with a far greater sight. A devilish grin, a plan hatching in Fudgeâs mind. Oh, he looked positively demonic like this, but the wider the grin grew, the better Pongo felt. After all, that grin could only mean one thing.
Fudge had an idea.
âRIPS, cancel all the plans I had for tonight,â He told his AI, spinning around and scurrying around to the side of his desk. âTell Alexa I came down with mimfluenza or some shit, I donât fucking care. Someone else can take up repair duty for the week. Weâve got a rush order to deal with.â
âWhat are you planning?â Pongo asked, standing up. At the same time, Fudge pulled out some blueprint paper, slamming it on the empty space on his desk. He kept his hand firmly placed on top of it, whipping a pencil out of thin air and smirking over his shoulder.
âTonight,â Fudge said, âIâm building Santaâs sleigh.â
~
True to his word, Fudge sketched out a sleigh to build, decked out with all sorts of functions that Pongo couldnât wrap his head around. All he was able to gather was that itâd be able to fly in a similar manner to a Skell and wouldnât require the use of reindeer (or aprica, which couldnât fly anyways!). Itâd have a functional GPS system and a way for Pongo to input all of his stops, as well as check which locations and people had been given their gifts and which hadnât. The sleigh would be powered by nuclear energy and have safety guards in place in case of an emergency, and - above all else - it would have a sick paint job. Pongo didnât make the comment in the moment, but Fudgeâs excitement almost made him cry. He was acting like a little kid, waiting for his presents under the tree, living in the memory of youth. It was too beautiful a moment for Pongo to squander.
After assessing what necessary for the sleigh, Fudge gave Pongo a shopping list of parts to acquire from the Outfitters and the shops in Armory Alley. The names boggled Pongoâs mind, and trying to pronounce any of them was hard enough, but he didnât even know their purpose! It resulted in a lot of confusion. Thank the gods Pongo never decided to become an Outfitter, honestly.
Luckily, none of the parts Fudge requested were too big to carry, and Pongo now walked confidently with a shopping bag full of pipes and gears and other knickknacks. It was heavy, of course, but nothing Pongo couldnât handle. He decided to peruse the commercial district afterwards in the hopes that he could pick up some last-minute gifts from the list. It was busy, but predictable at this point - Pongo was a pro at his job, after all! Years and years of experience shopping for the good people of NLA taught him a thing or two about savings, navigating the crowds, and -
âPongo!â
Oh, someone said his name! But in the thick of the crowd, Pongo couldnât identify the source right away. He scoured the road, the sidewalks, trying to see who couldâve called out to him. Only when a hand clasped his shoulder did he realize that the person had been behind him all long, and that person had some rather recognizable metallic red fingers.Â
âSydney!â Pongo twisted around and gave Sydney a hug, wrapping his arms over his shoulders. Sydney chuckled underneath him, returning the embrace gingerly. When they separated, Pongo asked, âDoing some last minute shopping for Christmas?â
âKinda,â He replied, âLooks like you are, too. Is it for theâŠyou knowâŠâ
âOh! Well, technically yes,â Pongo realized Sydney was referring to the bag of parts he was holding onto, âOne of my Outfitter friends caught on and insisted that I need a sleigh. He asked me to get some parts to help construct it. He neededâŠâ A pause, as he attempted to remember the names. â...A regeneration corepipe, a couple formstruct plating adhesives, a type three automotive latching mechanismâŠâ Another pause, when he couldnât bring himself to try and pronounce the names of the more complicated ones. â...some other things, too. I must admit, this kind of stuff is not something I understand well.â
Sydney peered into the bag, his head tilting in curiosity. Pongo made a mental note that he looked rather dashing today, dressed up in one of his fancier white suits. The red tie around his neck matched his arms in grandeur, a slight sheen to them that reflected the sunlight just enough to stand out. Gods above, it even made his eyes pop, a vibrant and passionate crimson hue.Â
â...Pon?â Sydney glanced up, wearing a faint smile.
âMm?â
âThatâs not a regeneration corepipe. Thatâs a regeneration corner pipe. Same material, but not the same purpose.â
Pongoâs face fell, the color draining from his face. âOh, shoot! I should go back and get the right one then, gods I thought -â
âIâll come with you, if you want,â He offered, âAnd donât beat yourself up for not getting it right. Itâs a pretty common misconception. Lots of Outfitters mix it up, even.â
âI appreciate that,â Pongo smiled wide, the quick bout of fear residing into his typical cheeriness, âGoodness, I am lucky to have someone so smart by my side!â
Sydney rubbed the back of his neck, a faint blush forming across his cheeks. âI mean, Iâm an Outfitter now. Iâm supposed to know these things.â
âI wonder if Fudge would welcome your help in constructing the sleigh,â He mused out loud, a careful hand upon his chin. âHe insisted that he would be able to complete it before my departure, butâŠâ
âIf youâre trying to play friend matchmaker again, Iâm not really sure itâll work out.â
âOne bad introduction should not define the entire experience! I mean, do you remember how we met?â
Sydney stiffened at that. âAh, y-yeah, umâŠâ
âI said it before and I will say it again: I forgive you for doing that,â Pongo gently nudged Sydneyâs shoulder, an act of reassurance. âThat aside, if it truly makes you uncomfortable, I will not ask Fudge about it. You will at least get the chance to meet him on Christmas Eve!â
âYou still expect me to be there?â He asked, âI mean, last year was just a fluke.â
âPart of the magic of Christmas is spending time with your loved ones,â Pongo asserted, âAnd last I checked, you are under that umbrella.â A pause, a shy smile. âIt would not be the same without you there.â
There was a sliver of hesitation in Sydneyâs gaze, biting the inside of his lip where the scar ran across his jawline. An image came to mind of Pongo running kisses down its path, but he had some amount of restraint, considering this was a public setting. Thereâd be time to sing those praises after heâd completed his mission.Â
âIâll be there,â Sydney eventually promised, and Pongo allowed himself to break his self-inflicted restraints and give him a quick peck on the lips.Â
âThank you, Sydney,â Pongo said, âI cannot tell you how much this means to me.â
Then, taking Sydneyâs hand in his own, Pongo glanced up towards the administrative district, the high and mighty BLADE Tower radiant in the afternoon sun. âAlright, now come and show me which one is the corepipe!â
âOkay, okay,â Sydney couldnât help but chuckle as Pongo nearly dragged him across the sidewalk, and he eventually took the lead down to the hangarâs elevator. Pongo smiled wide the whole way back, his mind swimming with a list of things still left to do, gifts he still needed to get, hugs he still needed to give. Gods above, how Christmas filled him with such wondrous spirit! Not that he wasnât full of love every other day of the year, but ever since heâd heard of Christmas, something about the holiday gave him the excuse to take things up a level. And considering last yearâs Christmas had beenâŠwell, less than satisfactory, given his whole âmissing both of his legsâ deal, Pongo was excited to return to the field and make this Christmas one to remember.Â
Just thinking about how magical everything felt, he allowed himself to daydream, to imagine how perfect the night would turn out to be. What could possibly go wrong?
~
Fudge would never admit this to anybody out loud, but damn, did he love Christmas. It had always been one of his favorite times of the year, a moment always shared with his dad and the rest of Carson Tech. There was a kind of feeling that didnât come with any other holiday, the feeling of spending time with those you loved most. All that âChristmas spiritâ bullshit that the commercials and songs spouted over the intercoms got on his nerves pretty quickly, but even then, they held some truth to them.Â
So hearing that Pongo was the famed Santa Claus that had been delivering presents for the past couple years, hearing that he didnât have any mode of transportation aside from his own Skell? What a brilliant excuse to combine two of his favorite things!!
Working on something this secret, though, meant that Fudge had to make a few sacrifices. RIPS was automatically programmed to notify Fudge of any incoming calls, and of all the calls he got leading up to Christmas Eve, the majority were from three people. The first was Ruadha, who was simply happy to talk to Fudge over the comm device about everything and anything. They did pry about the whole âsecret inventionâ thing, which Fudge fully expected, but it still prompted him to put up some extra security measures for his lab just in case the little gremlin decided to pay a surprise visit.Â
The second frequent caller was his father, Antonio Carson. Those calls were daily, and the conversations were on the same wavelength as those Fudge had with Ruadha, sprinkled with a few fatherly words of advice. He didnât ask about the secret invention as much as Fudge thought he would, but he quickly found out the reason why. Turns out, his father also had a secret he was working on, and he explained that it didnât feel right asking for a secret to be revealed when he was in no position to return the gesture. That didnât stop Fudge from wondering what it could be, though.
The third most frequent caller was none other than Polaris. However, that had been something of an error on her part. For whatever fucking reason, she called him a grand total of eight times in a ten minute time frame. When Fudge finally ordered RIPS to pick up so he could scream bloody murder at Polaris, her voice was muffled and far away. Fudge rolled his eyes, immediately deciphering what was happening - especially since Polaris wasnât the only voice he heard on the other line. Nope, there was a second person in the background, though he wasnât about to guess what the fuck they were doing. All he said before hanging up was âBlackmail materialâ. Whether or not it was worthy blackmail material, Fudge wasnât sure. It just felt good to scare her.Â
The sleigh was easy enough to build, so long as it had Fudgeâs undivided attention. Pongo returned with the parts far sooner than he expected, and Pongo even handed him an extra regeneration corner pipe. âI mixed them up,â Pongo had admitted, and to that, Fudge had responded, âIâll call this an early Christmas present thenâ. Pongo didnât stay much longer after that, and so Fudge got absorbed into his work for the next few days.Â
Christmas Eve came, and by the time the sun had set below the horizon, the final touches were being made to the sleigh. Fudge wiped his brow, gazing lovingly at his newest masterpiece. He couldnât think of anything else it would need, so he set his tools down and asked RIPS, âSend a text to Pongo and ask him where the rendezvous is for the operation tonight.â
âYES, MASTER CARSON.â
A few minutes passed, a bliss that came with success and pride, before RIPS informed Fudge, âMASTER CALDRAVIX HAS CONFIRMED THAT THE RENDEZVOUS LOCATION IS ON TOP OF BLADE TOWER IN THE ADMINISTRATIVE DISTRICT.â
âAlright, sounds like a pla -â Fudge stopped. â...Oh. Oh fuck.â
RIPS didnât even need to ask. How in the ever loving fuck was he supposed to get this sleigh to the top of BLADE Tower without anybody noticing? Fudge groaned, the base of his palms digging into his eyebrows. Looked like he had some more work to do.Â
~
As fate would have it, a quick invisibility cloak did the trick. Was it as polished as the rest of the sleigh? Oh absolutely fucking not. Was Fudge a little ashamed of how spotty that last minute detail was? Yep. But hey, it would work for tonight, and heâd have an entire year to refine it further.
With the invisibility cloak on, Fudge used his Amdusias Hades to lift the sleigh and carefully fly it to the top of BLADE Tower. Luckily, the vast majority of NLAâs population had retired for the night, so questions about his Skellâs cupped arms were few and easily dismissed. As he flew closer, Fudge spotted other Skells parked on top of the tower - ah fuck, was he late? Whatever the case was, he landed near the edge, setting the sleigh down as gently as possible before exiting his Skell and greeting everyone outside. He recognized Eros, Pongoâs Skell, which had a comically large sack placed in front of it. Those were the presents, presumably, and thinking about its contents made Fudgeâs heart flutter for a moment. Not too far from the Skellâs feet was Pongo, dressed in a rather nice Santa outfit, complete with the hat atop his head. Was that puffball on the hatâs tip heart-shaped? Okay, that was a nice touch. He waved to Fudge as he approached, and that was when Fudge saw the person heâd been talking to.
âL, what the fuck are you wearing?â Fudge asked, nearly choking on his words. The jolly blue xeno was wearing a rather skimpy elf outfit, rather akin to those cursed bunnybods Fudge occasionally witnessed BLADES strutting around in.Â
âIt is our Christmas attire!â L exclaimed cheerfully, unaware of just how he appeared, âWe parade in this every year during Christmasâs Evening!â
âCostumes are not necessary, but I think they are rather fun,â Pongo chirped, âWhen I recruited Danniel, I gave him reindeer antlers. IâŠwell, I am not quite sure what I would give you, Fudge. I think we might need to duplicate some roles.â
âIâm the sleigh guy. Isnât that enough?â Fudge raised an eyebrow, praying to every god that he wouldnât have to wear something stupid. Sensing his unease, Pongo gave him a reassuring grin.Â
âIt is more than enough. Though, ahâŠwhere exactly is the sleigh?â
Oh, right. Fudge turned back towards his Skell, towards the still invisible sleigh. Pulling out his comm device, he typed in the command for the invisibility device to decloak, and in moments, the sleigh revealed itself to the bystanders atop BLADE Tower. The sides shone a metallic red, glistening in the remnants of the sunset. The seat inside was lined with as plush a fabric as Fudge could find - donât ask him what material it was, because honestly, that was not Fudgeâs area of expertise. A control panel sat in front of the seating, forming a near-perfect semicircle that was reminiscent of the paneling inside a standard Skell. Even the buttons were in a similar arrangement, though none of them were lit up. Pongo would have to turn the bad boy on before the real light show began.
âOh my gods,â Pongo breathed, âFudge, you are brilliant.â
âGo ahead and take a closer look if you want,â Fudge told him, âItâs yours, after all.â
That was all Pongo needed to rush forward, squealing like a child, admiring all of the detailwork in half-formed ramblings. Fudge allowed himself a second to revel in the pride, the absolue beauty that heâd managed to build in record time. However, as he glanced to the left, to the right, he realized that there were a few more people here that he hadnât interacted with. Another darker skinned fellow with reindeer antlers and freckles that rivaled Fudgeâs stood awkwardly nearby, for instance. Pongo had mentioned his name over texts - Danny, right? Pongo had the tendency to call people by their full names, an endearing sign of respect that heâd apparently learned early on in his life. Eh, fuck it, Fudge could try to make conversation.
âDanny, yeah?â Fudge started, and the address made Danny make a little noise from the back of his throat.
âOh, ah, y-yeah! Nice to meet you,â He replied, offering a gloved hand out to shake. As Fudge shook it with his left hand, he could immediately tell that the material under the fabric was different, clearly not the standard mimeosome framework. Fudge resisted every temptation to probe into the details, so he broke off the handshake first and shifted focus.Â
âHowâd you get roped into this shit, then?â
âOh! A few years ago, Pongo bumped into me while he had his Christmas list out, and I saw it and decided to offer my help,â Danny explained, âHe said I could be Rudolph since he was Santa and L was an elf.â
âDoes that mean you helped him deliver everywhere in the city?â Fudge asked, genuinely curious as to his role.
âNo, I just help him find everything on his list. He does all the deliveries himself - and now heâll do them with a really cool looking sleigh!â He said, eyeing the sleigh that Pongo was still bouncing around. Seriously, how could anyone have that amount of energy? As he watched the show unfold, Danny continued, âThe sleigh looks incredible, by the way. It mustâve taken a long time to build!â
âEh, three days, give or take,â Fudge shrugged, and he couldnât really determine why Dannyâs eyes grew wide at the answer. âIt doesnât have nearly all of the features I wanted it to have, but itâs got more than enough to function for tonight. Next year Iâll have made it perfect.â
âI donât doubt that for a second,â Danny agreed, âI look forward to seeing it!â
They both watched as Pongo boarded his Skell, the heavy sack of presents lifting easily in Erosâs arms. Fudge tensed; he hadnât given Pongo the go-ahead to load the sleigh yet, and he wanted to make sure the weight distribution wasnât going to fuck up the sleighâs integrity. But the sack came down on the back half of the sleigh, and though Fudge was bracing for the worst, he heard no signs of the sleigh faltering. Pongo then exited his Skell and continued to geek out over how wonderful the sleigh was, with L piping in with his own compliments every so often.Â
It was then that Fudge spotted another figure approaching out of the corner of his eye, though they seemed to be ignoring him and Danny. Metallic red arms poked out of a pristine white suit - wait, okay, was there a trend here? Why did everyone have metal arms aside from L? What a weird fucking bias. Whatever the case, the suit alone was enough for Fudge to identify the man as none other than Sydney. He wasnât wearing any sort of Christmas costume, but that also made him stick out like a sore thumb. That, and the brooding. If there was anything that could get on Fudgeâs nerves, it was brooding.Â
However, he could already hear Pongoâs voice in the back of his mind, an innocent excitement about his friends and loved ones helping him out on one of the most important nights of the year. So Fudge swallowed his pride and took a cautious step forward, enough that he was an equal distance away from both Danny and Sydney. Sydney cast his glance downwards, and Fudge fought the urge to smack the look off of his face. It wasnât even like the guy was acting high and mighty - it was the fucking height advantage and the fact that Sydney looked so punchable! Hold it together, Fudge, just for the night. He tried to be civil, thinking that maybe he could see past the horrible first impression he was getting.
âSo youâre Sydney.â
âYeah.â
â...â
â...â
Yeah, no, Fudge didnât like this guy at all. Why was Pongoâs taste in men so shitty? Whatever, he could deal with working alongside this douchebag for a night. But that didnât stop him from squinting, from looking this guy up and down and crossing his arms. Sydney scowled, staring right back at him. Oh, now, this was gonna be fun. He could practically smell the distaste in the air, the fuel being poured onto the fire.Â
âAre two of my favorite people getting along?â Pongo merrily asked from the side of the sleigh, innocent to the vitriolic stand-off happening in front of him.
Fudge looked away quickly, and out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sydney do the same. They both responded at the same time.
âNo fuckinâ problems here.â
âYeah, weâre fine.â
Pongo positively beamed at that. âFantastic! Oh, that makes me feel a lot better. I was starting to think that adding onto the team so quickly would be awkward!â
âThe Christmas legend states that the more there are, the merrier youâll be,â L chirped, âAnd itâs impossible not to be merry on this wondrous night!â
âItâs definitely nice seeing all the Christmas decorations from up here. Shows how everyoneâs still festive!â Danny gazed down at the city below, the districts of the lower level shining in all sorts of Christmas lights. Fudge was eventually able to spot his own contribution to the front of the test hangar, though he felt a little disappointed by the fact that they blended in with the rest of the lights from his current viewpoint.Â
âSo whatâs the procedure now?â Fudge asked, sneaking a peek down at his comm device once more. âAll the necessary last-minute detailing on the sleigh is done, and judging by the scans, itâs holding the sackâs weight just fine. Should be good for takeoff whenever youâre ready, Santa.â
âLâCirufe, is every present accounted for?â Pongo said, turning to the xenoform.
âAll presents counted and accounted!â He confirmed, âWhenever youâre ready to depart, we shall light the way!â
âAlright! Then it is time to test the sleigh,â Pongo turned back to Fudge, âRemind me what the controls are again? You said there were a few important things to remember.â
âRight,â Fudge adjusted the collar of his sweater, clearing his throat. Could he make himself look a little taller, a little more important? He hoped the bravado did the trick. âWhen you get into the sleigh, youâll see a huge panel in front of you. Iâve designed it so itâs similar in appearance to your everyday Skell, with Arts buttons and everything. Center button turns the entire thing on, check to make sure all the other buttons light up when you do that. If they all look good, use the levers to take her up gently - too much force and youâll shoot straight up vertically into the air.â
âOh, like what Sydney did with his golden Ares once,â Pongo nodded in understanding, though the comment made Sydney mutter something under his breath about that not being his fault.Â
âI donât wanna fucking know,â Fudge said curtly, âBut yeah. Donât drive like a bitch and you should be fine. Worst case scenario, think of it like a Skell, and ask yourself what youâd do if you were in a Skell. Danny and I will be on the comm network on it too, in case youâve got any questions.â
âWait, Iâm gonna be connected to it?â Danny seemed surprised at this revelation, and Fudge did his best not to roll his eyes and scoff.Â
âIâm making you the navigator, so yeah. Next year Iâll probably install a GPS into the sleigh so Pon can go his own route, but as it stands, I had three days to build an entire fucking sleigh from scratch, so now thatâs your job. Rudolphâs supposed to drive the sleigh, yâknow, so at least now your roleâs gonna be a little more accurate.â He took a moment to adjust his goggles, which were starting to slide down over his face. The wind was really being a bitch about this, huh? âAnyways, Iâll be connected to it too, since I gotta perform system checks and make sure the whole thingâs running smoothly.â
âAnd what will Sydney be doing?â Pongo asked sweetly.
Fudge looked at Sydney. Sydney looked at Fudge.
â...Emotional support elf,â Fudge shrugged.
âExcuse me -â
âAnyways, if anything goes south, you can reach me and Danny through the intercom in the sleigh,â Fudge talked over Sydneyâs protests, âOh, and donât likeâŠlean out of the side or some shit. Iâm not gonna be held responsible for Santaâs death.â
âWhy didnât you make any fucking guard rails if you were worried about that?!â Sydney raised.
âAlright, bitchbaby, next time you can make the sleigh in three days, how about that?â
âI could do it in two, and I could do it with enough safety features so I wouldnât have to fucking worry about Santa splatting into the middle of the residential districtâs tennis court!!â
âBatter up then, asshole, God fuckinâ knows youâve got enough credits up your ass to make it happen! Canât fuckinâ wait to get blinded on Christmas Eve looking for Santa, dashing through the snow on a gold mercedes sleigh!â
âAt least mine would look like a star descending from the heavens! What does yours do, crash and burn? Donât think I donât know the Carson legacy just because I havenât been building fire hazards as long as you have.â
âYou fucking piece of shit -â
âGUYS.â
Sydney and Fudge had gotten in each othersâ faces, teeth bared and trading verbal blows. Fudge could feel the blood beneath his skin boiling, fuel on a fire that wouldnât stop burning until it knew the sweet taste of victory. But just as he was about to make things physical, Danny placed himself between the two arguing Outfitters, stretching his arms out to create distance between them. Right, Danny was a Mediator. He was trying to mediate. How cute.
âNow is not the night to do this,â Danny said sternly, âYouâre allowed to not be friends, but maybe save the arguing for when youâre not in front of Pongo.â
Fudge looked over, and Pongo was by Lâs side, having watched the entire argument unfold. Fudge had been so focused on the fire inside his heart that he didnât realize that heâd taken some of Pongoâs warmth to do so, the air now a frostbitten chill. Pongo was frozen to the spot, eyes wide like a deer in the headlights. Oh shit, were those tears in the corners of his eyes? Damnit, Fudge really dropped the ball on this one. But still, it was not an easy feat to temper his anger, so his next statement still contained a level of animosity that wasnât meant for Pongo.
âGet in the fucking sleigh, Santa.â
Pongo didnât move immediately, though the brief flash in his eyes indicated that heâd heard Fudge loud and clear. However, after taking a moment in the silence, Pongoâs first steps were not towards the sleigh. Instead, he strode over to Fudge, leaned down, and hugged him tight. Fudge gasped, squirming in Pongoâs grip for a moment.Â
âThank you for doing this,â Pongo whispered into Fudgeâs shoulder, âI am so grateful to have a friend like you in my life.â
âOh, uhâŠâ Fudge found himself at a loss for words, stumbling upon the bashful, âDonât mention it. Least I could do.â
Pongo pulled away then, turning and giving Sydney the same hug. Fudge could hear him whisper something too, and whatever it was, it made Sydneyâs expression melt. Pongo left Sydney with a goodbye kiss on the cheek, and after giving Danny a hug of his own, he rejoined L by the sleigh. They exchanged a quick hug before Pongo climbed aboard, sliding into his seat in front of the sleighâs controls. As Fudge had instructed before, Pongo tapped the center button, and the sleigh roared to life, the thrusters in the rear glowing a vibrant red. Before initiating takeoff, he looked to Fudge, and Fudge gave a thumbs-up to indicate that all systems were green.Â
After that, Fudge could only describe the takeoff as something out of a movie. The sleigh began to ride, slowly, steadily, the flames behind leaving trails of embers and stardust behind it. Though the sleigh wobbled in its ascent, it soon found its balance, and Pongo found his confidence behind the controls. Every system remained operational as the thrusters were given more juice, and the sleigh rocketed off into the night. Fudge even swore that he heard Pongo trying to mimic Santaâs laughter, a hearty âHo Ho Hoâ that echoed across the city. It wouldâve brought tears to his eyes if he wasnât in the company of others, though he promptly noticed that L had begun openly weeping. Danny was the first to ask if he was okay, and to that, L had responded that he was overwhelmed with joy. Thank the fucking gods, honestly.Â
And so the ragtag group of Santagoâs helpers watched as, once again, Santago took to the skies to deliver presents to all of the citizens of NLA. In the silence of their awe, Fudge smiled, and uttered a single phrase.
âMerry Christmas, motherfuckers.â
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Imperium 3: Chapter 8
Te amo. (I love you.)
He was Pongo.
He was Pongo, and that was okay. He was okay.
Pongo was far form perfect. He would never have admitted to perfection even before Cocytios, even before Starr was brought into existence. He was something fragmented, torn asunder by trauma and a broken past, stitched back together because he willed it to be so. Starr accepted death, and Pongo - though reluctantly - accepted life. And Mira remained by his side, existing here in this body alongside him as an eternal companion. It had once felt fitting that he give himself a new name, but now, the only name was Pongo.Â
He was Pongo.
He was Pongo.
âŠ
âWake up, Pongo.â
He wasnât asleep. He was hiding this whole time. Sleeping and hiding were not the same.Â
And yet, Pongo opened his eyes. He couldnât hide from the sunrise, golden and orange hues dancing across a once darkened sky. He couldnât hide from the familiar face staring down at him, her smile wider than heâd ever seen it before, a single relieved laugh leaving her lips. Oh, Elma, Pongo was so happy to see you again! He wasnât afraid, not like he was when Starr walked the earth. He let himself smile back, revel in the joy he felt.Â
âHello, Elma,â Pongo breathed, his voice hoarse.Â
Before he could react, Elma had lifted him up, and there he was in her embrace, his first hug after waking. Pongo knew Aidoneusâs transformation had left him weak, he couldnât feel any of his usual strength in that moment. But he hugged back, after his moment of surprise had faded, and damn did it feel good. There was solace, here, a sense of peace that he had difficulty finding in most circumstances. He missed her, he missed this. But she had to pull away, as did he. There was no world where they could stay in each otherâs embrace forever. There was too much that needed to be said, too much that needed to be done.Â
âFriend Starr is okay?â That was Froyoyo, asking that question. He stood behind Elma, and Pongo could see him over Elmaâs shoulder. If the names and roles were reversed - Froyoyo asking Starr if Pongo was okay - Starr wouldâve flinched, been angry. But all Pongo felt was the exhaustion that came with accepting life once again. He grinned at the question, a sad but understanding thing. He opened his mouth to tell Froyoyo the truth, explain what and who he was, but Vanala stepped up before he could.Â
âFriend not Starr anymore,â Vanala said, mesmerized, âFriend is whole again. Found peace in self.â
Her lessons rang true in Pongoâs heart, even though Starr was the one to receive them. She knew Starr was fragmented, back then, and that heâd need to heal in order to understand both aspects of using water ether. Ripples, she called them. Imperfections, flaws, ruins of the past he could never leave behind. Starr had been wary of that sentiment, believing himself too broken to heal. But PongoâŠnow he knew the truth. He was always going to be imperfect, he was always going to have ripples that he couldnât stop from existing. This was a life he was going to cherish, a self that he would accept despite all of its evident flaws.Â
As if to test his theory, to reassure Vanala, Pongo shifted away from Elma. He raised one of his hands, and in his palm, a ball of water formed, shaping itself into a heart. The ether came more naturally than it did before, and with wide eyes he realized that the ether wasnât originating from Starrâs gauntlets. This was a creation he deemed into existence without the gauntletsâ help. This was Pongoâs doing, his whole and undivided doing. Vanala mimicked his widened eyes, though her gaze was full of pride.
âMy name is Pongo,â He formally introduced himself to Vanala and Froyoyo, âI am the original inhabitant of this body, alongside Mira.â A pause, a softening expression. âI want to apologize to you both. I caused your caravan a great deal of pain when I -â
âFurry dragon was not Pon,â Froyoyo butted in forcefully, âNothing to apologize for. Froyoyo confused, but know that friend wouldnât hurt on purpose.â
âRight!â Vanala agreed, âFriend Pon doesnât need to ask forgiveness. Vanala just happy that Pon is okay!â
And then, a little furry body snuggled up between Elma and Pongo, hugging Pongo tightly. He chuckled, hugging Sprinkle Sprinkle back after letting the water ether in his palm dissipate. The littleponâs voice was muffled as they said, âSprinkle Sprinkle didnât even say goodbye to Starr. Can friend Pon tell Starr goodbye?â
That nearly broke Pongoâs heart. He could feel it splintering, the weakened thing beneath his skin, but he was Pongo. Pongo was stronger than he knew, and he used that strength to smile, just as he always had. Even with his reputation, his near-inability to lie, he did his best to ease Sprinkle Sprinkleâs worries. âI will. He loved you a lot, you know. You, and all of your brothers and sisters.â
âSprinkle Sprinkle knows,â They leaned back, sniffling. âWill miss Starr very much. WillâŠWill Pon come back to caravan instead?â
âŠPerhaps Pongo wasnât as strong as he thought. He felt it, then, that pathetic little heart of his shattering into porcelain fragments. It wasnât as severe a breakage as when he was brought back to life; the pieces had been stitched back together thanks to Miraâs handiwork back then, and that had been the reason Starr was born. This was a fracture Pongo would have to fix, and this time, he would do it on his own.Â
âI have to go home,â Pongo said truthfully, âBack to the city. But I promise I will visit the caravan often. Goodness knows I will miss you and your siblings too.â
Sprinkle Sprinkle took a moment to process his response. Then, he all but launched himself back into Pongoâs arms for one last hug. Gods above, he truly missed this feeling. And it ended too soon, with Sprinkle Sprinkle pulling away and giving Pongo a sad but sympathetic grin. They were young, of course, but Pongo got the feeling that they were more in tune with his mental state than all the others around him.Â
Then, a rumble, almost akin to a catâs purr, echoing through the frost-stricken air. Pongo swiveled his head and came face to face with the bowed muzzle of Telethia, the Endbringer. How patient they had been, to wait for all the others to speak their piece. In this form they could offer no words of their own, so the gentleness of their descent had to suffice. Though the memories of their time in a humanoid form were not his to claim, Pongo saw the image of Solstice smiling down at him, their blue-green eyes shining with admiration and relief. How lucky Nessa had been, to have them by her side. How lucky Aidoneus had been, to have them fight Corvhesperikon alongside it.
And how lucky Pongo was now, to be able to reach his hand up to the Telethiaâs snout, to be able to whisper, âThank you, my friend. Thank you for everything.â
The Telethia hummed, accepting Pongoâs touch and closing their eyes, His hand was so tiny in comparison to their body, yet it basked in the contact, the warmth connecting them in the frigid cold. They both pulled away simultaneously, and as the Telethia opened its eyes, it seemed to ask a silent question. Pongo knew what that question was, and he knew the answer to give. All he had to do was nod, and the Telethia backed up, turned, gave one last glance towards the group. Their wings beat heavy against the air, stirring up the snow beneath their feet, and soon they had flown off into the sunrise, light bouncing off of their etheric feathers. Pongo watched Solstice depart until there was no silhouette left to track.Â
Froyoyo broke the silence left in their wake. âIf friend going home, should start traveling soon. Having sun in Cocytios very good for staying warm.â
âShould go back to caravan too,â Vanala told her husband, âCaravan likely worried sick about Legendary Heropon!!â
âWorried sick about both Froyoyo and Vanala,â He corrected, his fuzzy hand reaching out to clasp Vanalaâs. âAnd likely lots of rebuilding to be done. Corvhesperikon made big impact on caravan.â
âIf thereâs any resources I could have BLADE send to you to speed along the reconstruction process, let me know,â Elma offered, frowning when Froyoyo quickly shook his head.Â
âNot need outside help. Would rather not have caravan well known outside Cocytios.â
Pongo immediately sensed the reasoning behind that request, and to reassure Elma, he nodded again. She maintained a frown, though that simple gesture softened her expression. âIâm sure thereâs a way I can work around your involvement in this whole endeavor when I write the BLADE report. Either way, HQ will ask questions about how and why our research operations failed. Iâll have to come up with a rather convincing story, especially if Iâm to omit you and Aidoneus from the record.â
âWe should count our lucky numbers that Solstice was able to help, then,â Pongo said, âYou can tell them that the Telethia from Noctilum appeared and destroyed Corvhesperikon - all by itself.â
âBLADE might believe it, on account of the Telethiaâs involvement in subduing Pharsis last year,â She concurred, âEither way, you wonât have to worry. The caravan and Aidoneusâs involvement wonât be revealed outside of myself, Pongo, Lin and Tatsu.â
âTatsu was Nopon that came with friend Elma before, no?â Froyoyo squinted as he tried to remember, âFroyoyo taught littlepon fighting moves while Elma, Nessa, Solstice and other friend went to find Starr. Little friend - that Lin?â
âYes, I arrived with them both the first time we came to Cocytios. Tatsu still talks about you back home. Youâre something of a role model to him.â
âHappy Froyoyo could make difference in littleponâs life. Froyoyo give permission to speak of events here with Lin and Tatsu. Friend Elma trusts them, and Froyoyo sense that trust from Elma is important thing indeed.â
âSeemed very much like Lin and Tatsu were Elmaâs family when everyone was at caravan,â Vanala agreed, âWould make Vanala uncomfortable if Vanala requested Elma to keep secrets from own family.â
âShe will probably have questions about where I have been these past few months, too,â Pongo added softly, âI do not think I could lie to her.â
âItâs something weâll discuss once weâre back in the city,â Elma stood herself up, dusting the snow off of the back of her armor. Now that the sun had risen further up into the sky, her hair shone with angelic brilliance. Something about it reminded Pongo of the first time heâd met her, that first sunrise looking out at Primordia after being awoken from the lifepod, and the sense of deja-vu only increased when she held out her hand for him to take. âFor now, Froyoyoâs right. We should get moving if we want to return home. The journey here took about two days, but if weâre quick, we can set up camp on Primordiaâs beach by nightfall.â
Pongo took Elmaâs hand, and she hoisted him up, though it took him a moment to find his footing. The journey seemed reasonable enough, though considering just how vast the continents were, it almost seemed too quick. He had to tell himself that it was because of BLADEâs vast technological resources, something heâd been deprived of during his time in Cocytios. Honestly, it felt strange to think about. Soon heâs be on board a vessel, soon heâd be reassuming his work with BLADE. Soon heâd be wielding his weapons, familiar in the past but foreign to the present, and heâd be putting that technology towards the betterment of humanity. Heâd be helping people, protecting people - just as Aidoneus wanted to do.
âFroyoyo wish friends safe travel back home,â Froyoyo said, âAnd Froyoyo thank friends for everything. Always welcome at Desserta Caravan.â
âBetter visit!!â Sprinkle Sprinkle reiterated, jumping up and down to prove the importance of their demand, âOr Sprinkle Sprinkle find way to friendâs home and visit there!!â
Vanala rolled her eyes at that, though it was clear it wasnât out of annoyance. Sprinkle Sprinkle had all but proven that their stubbornness would put them into any situation they wanted to be in. Theyâd find a way to fulfill that promise of visiting NLA, one way or another. Pongo chuckled, imagining how Lin would act to another furry friend in their midst. The food puns would only continue to grow, and it didnât help that Sprinkle Sprinkleâs name wasâŠwell. It was ripe for jokes, to say the least.
And with all of that in mind, the time finally came to bid the Nopon goodbye. His second family, his second home. They may not have been Pongoâs memories to keep, but he walked hand in hand with Starr through it all, and that had to count for something. For his own sake and for Starrâs, he spoke for them both.
âGoodbye, everyone.â
Froyoyo gave one last bow, Vanala gave one last smile. And then they turned away, with Sprinkle Sprinkle in tow. Elma did the same, and Pongo joined her. Not once did he think of picking up Starrâs mask, set so perfectly in the snow mere yards away from his feet.Â
~
The journey across Cocytios was quiet. Elma and Pongo hardly spoke a word to each other, even when they passed by the research base that BLADE had set up for the investigation of Corvhesperikonâs skeletal remains. The base was in terrible shape, the entire structure demolished and materials scattered across the snow. No humans emerged, no signs of life made themselves known. Elma and Pongo exchanged a meaningful glance. Elma did not smile, and she quickly averted her eyes to the wreckage after their eye contact. Pongo knew in that moment that none of the operatives that had joined Elma on this venture survived. The thought left a bitter taste in his mouth, a sour pit in his stomach. They didnât linger, pressing on quickly past the base.
When they reached the ocean, a boat was conveniently parked by the shore. It was a massive thing, clearly made to hold lots of cargo and passengers. It felt empty even when Elma and Pongo boarded, and Elma quickly assumed the controls and turned on the engine. Pongo hadnât hesitated in stepping on board, yet a part of him wished heâd given Cocytios a proper goodbye. Heâd been trekking through snow and the frigid winter air for so long that it felt like home. He reminded himself that it wasnât his true home; no, if anything, Cocytios belonged to Starr. NLA was Pongoâs home, NLA was where Pongo belonged. He wouldnât miss the cold if he had the warmth of his friends and family at his side.Â
And yet, he watched Cocytios disappear beyond the horizon as they sailed off deeper into the ocean. Why did Pongo remain so attached to the continent that had brought him so much pain? Maybe one day heâd be able to verbalize it, but for now, he let the sadness of farewell make itself known. This wouldnât be the last he saw of Cocytios, he promised. After all, Starr had made a promise to Lumina to return, to find her the help she needed to recover. In Starrâs lieu, Pongo felt it was fitting to uphold that promise.Â
After what felt like a lifetime, Primordia appeared in the distance. The cold had left them behind, and in its stead was saltwater and warmth. Pongo became increasingly aware that he was still wearing Starrâs clothes, and gods, did it make him uncomfortable. He shifted in his spot, beginning to wonder if it was a good idea to enter the city in Starrâs attire. Starr wouldâve hated NLA, he wouldâve hated the hustle and bustle and he wouldâve despised people staring at him. Pongo reached for Starrâs breastplate, lifting it easily over his head. The cape came off with it, attached near the shoulders, and Pongo instantly felt a sense of relief. He wondered if he shouldâve left it back in Cocytios, a memorial to the fallen. But Starr wouldn't have wanted that, either, would he? This was too complicated to process. He resorted to carrying it back home.Â
The boat slowly approached the shoreline, a smooth transition thanks to Elma behind the controls. After the engine was cut, she left the helm, coming up on Pongoâs right side. She looked up at him, searching for his response, gauging his headspace. He stared ahead at the land before him. Night had long since claimed the skies, but it was young enough that his visibility hadnât been impacted. It certainly helped that a few temporary lampposts had been constructed at the beach, the sand shifted where boxes and supply crates had once stood. And the breeze that wafted over from the landâŠit felt good. It was welcoming him home with open arms. Pongo melted into its embrace, emitting a soft sigh.Â
Elma opened up a control panel within the shipâs wall railing, and as she held down a button, a metal ramp emerged out of the shipâs side, touching down on the shore. She closed the control panel, opened the door to the ramp, waved with one hand for Pongo to go first. Step by step, he grew closer, closer, until his foot sank into wet sand. There it was again, that welcoming breeze, a kiss to reassure him that there was nothing to fear. Pongo was home.
It didnât take them very long to set up camp for the night. Even though the city was close, indigen activity at this time of the night wasnât something either of them wanted to deal with, especially when Pongo felt his eyelids trying to force themselves shut. By the gods, it had been some time since heâd truly slept. Starr knew how to sleep, how to navigate the nightmares and emerge from them unscathed. Did Pongo have that strength, too?
Before he could answer his own question, footsteps approached, and Elma sat down next to him. Heâd been leaning against one of the cliffs, exhaustion written on his face despite his best efforts to keep it subdued. A lamppost flickered a few yards away, not close enough to illuminate them fully. They sat like this for a while under the cover of night, simply existing beside each other.Â
âIâll keep watch,â Elma told him, and it occurred to Pongo that this was the first time either of them had spoken a word since leaving Cocytios, âGet some rest.â
Pongo fought it, that base instinct to deny needing any rest, to offer to stay up the whole night to help her. But nothing came. He closed his eyes, silent and wordless, his head heavy and tilting. He found purchase on her shoulder and never saw her surprise, her confusion, her sympathy all blending together. That night, he did not dream. That night, Pongo slept soundly.Â
In the morning, there was no snow, no precipitation to speak of. The sun bore down on them like a dream come true, and with renewed energy the two reached the West Gate in no time. Elma showed no hesitance in stepping forward, continuing to lead Pongo as she always had. But Pongo stopped, staring up at the shining metal gate, the gleam of the crystals shooting out of the impact site. Did anyone ever figure out that those crystals were condensed miranium? He supposed it was something he was attuned to, but never had the appropriate reason to share. Though the sunlight caught on it in fractured mirror reflections, he could see the pulse of the planet cascading through it, blood pumping through the system, a buried heart beneath the ground. Mira had been silent for their voyage, but this was reassurance that it was alive, just resting.Â
Elma looked over her shoulder, finding that Pongo had paused. âAre you okay, Pongo?â
He spoke the truth. âIt feels strange, being home. There is a sense ofâŠof day java.â
âDeja-vu,â Elma replied, âI feel it too. After all, this is the same route that I brought you on when I first found you in Starfall Basin.â
âThat feels like it was so long ago,â Pongo breathed, âI could never have predicted that all of this would come to pass. To think, back then I had no idea who I even wasâŠâ
âDo you know, now?â
âHm?â
âDo you know who you are, now?â
The question took him by surprise. But as the realization set in, Pongo found that it was easy enough to answer. There was so much he could say.
I am an Interceptor with BLADE.
I am a part of Team Elma.
I am an avatar of Mira.
I am the founder of the Free Hug Stand in the Commercial District.Â
I am self-sacrificial to the point of self destruction.
I am happy even when I am hurting.
I am a broken soul on the way to repairing myself.
And in the end, he simply said, âI am Pongo.â
Elma smiled. âIâm proud of you, Pongo.â
Light flooded through his body, a warmth unparalleled. Had he ever heard someone say that to him before? Was he worthy of that pride she felt? Pongo pushed those thoughts down, instead following after Elma now that heâd been reassured. Truth be told, he was not nervous about coming home after being away for such a long time. There was the panic of falling into the same routine, that heâd fall down the same holes and make the same mistakes. He was Pongo, yes, but Pongo had his flaws. Reclaiming the name and the being meant he had to reclaim those unsavory parts of himself. But heâd be better this time, he had to be. It would take time, but he would be Pongo born anew, free from those flaws of the past.
The transition between Primordiaâs wilds to the confines of NLA was a familiar one, though jarring all the same. Voices echoed from all around, the Industrial Districtâs hustle and bustle sweeping Pongo into its mix. Elma took everything in stride, though Pongo was all too aware of the turned heads and shocked expressions of those who saw them walk past. He swallowed hard and kept his focus on the sidewalk, on Elmaâs back, clinging to ignorance like a plague.
The test hangar was busier than the district outside, but luckily Elma raised a hand to Pongo before they fully entered. She told him to wait, for Lin was likely inside performing some Skell armor resistance tests as she had been for the past few weeks. Pongo laughed, saying that sounded like Lin. They agreed the fresh air would do her some good. Then Elma dove into the chaos, her bright red armor still pinpointable through the crowd. Pongo backed up so he was leaning against the hangar entranceâs wall, putting his hands in his pockets. Some people walked by and gave him strange looks, and again he was reminded of how uncomfortable it was to wear Starrâs clothes.Â
Perhaps the clothes were the reason Lin didnât recognize him right away, following behind Elma for a time before they finally saw each other. And when she finally recognized him, she bolted across the hangar, tears in the corners of her eyes, jumping up into Pongoâs embrace as he spun her around and laughed and relished in the joy he felt. She asked many questions, and Pongo gave her many answers, though he saved the overarching and important ones for when they went back to their barracks. There, he answered everything he could, even through Linâs heartbreak and tears. She hugged him so many times that it was almost as if she never let go. Tatsu appeared at one point, emerging from behind a wall with his head lowered in shame. Heâd been eavesdropping, he admitted to it, but curiosity had gotten the better of him once heâd overheard news of the Desserta Caravan. Even now, he had a soft spot for Cocytiosâs Legendary Heropon and his loving wife, a hero all her own. To think, two immortal Nopon had taught him how to fight! What luck indeed!Â
And after all was said and done, Elma told him he could change into his combat vest and jeans, hanging up perfectly in the closet in his room. The moment Pongo had changed and saw himself in the mirror, everything felt right. These were his clothes, this was his body. He was home, finally home.
When he came back outside into the main area, Lin handed him two cups of hot chocolate, ones that sheâd brewed herself. Pongo raised an eyebrow - why two cups? - but everything made sense when she said that the second cup was for someone he hadnât seen yet. Someone who was, in fact, worried about him from the very start of his disappearance. Heâd even filed a missing persons report, though Elma said Chausson didnât think much of it. After all, Pongo was one of the most revered and capable fighters in BLADE. Heâd be back.
So with two styrofoam cups in hand, steam pouring from the top with hints of deep dark chocolate, Pongo left the barracks and walked down Armory Alley, towards the one he missed the most. It appeared to be a day like most others for him, a profitable but busy day indeed. Jejebba and L both were teaming up to try and sell a pair of swords to a young Curator - oh goodness, it was Mia. She looked entranced by the swords, one a vibrant red with green etheric inlays, and the other gleaming a royal white and gold. She grabbed her comm device only to sink into herself. Pongo could immediately tell she didnât have the funds. She never did.Â
Deja-vu, Pongo thought as he grabbed his own comm device with one hand. A few quick taps, and the funds had been sent over. Miaâs eyes suddenly widened, and though she was still too far away for Pongo to hear her, he could see her evident excitement. He continued walking towards her until he was closer, and after swiveling back and forth, she met his gaze and her smile reached both of her ears.Â
And LâCirufe, bless his heart, found him standing there seconds later. His surprise quickly bled into his relief, his adoration, his love.Â
Pongo smiled.
âI still owe you more than a hot chocolate, but hopefully it is still a good start.â
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Imperium 3: Chapter 7
Tempus est dicere bonam noctem. (Itâs time to say good night.)
Starr knew his eyes were open. He could feel himself blinking, shaking in the onslaught of confusion, but everything was pitch black. There was no structure below his feet; he was floating, somehow, in this dark expanse of nothingness. Was this death? Was this somewhere in between? He took a deep breath, the air cold and frigid around him, but no condensation dared to form, no sign of life emerged from his being.Â
âMira?â He called out, hoping for some kind of answer. It was foolish to expect one if he was dead, but maybe the planet had a way of reaching him in this state, so far from the realm of reality and life.
I am here. I justâŠ
The planet responded, hesitant, unsure. Starr grit his teeth. They had no time to be cowards. This was what needed to be done, and the sooner it was over with, the sooner heâd be gone. He didnât want to linger here, not in this world, not when the beings that formed him had clearly changed their minds about fusing together and finding their path towards healing. Were they both happy with this, truly? Was Starr really just a plaything for them to find their peace, and now that heâd fulfilled his purpose, theyâd discard of him? The longer the silence lasted, the more Starr felt angry at the entire situation. This was wrong. This was unfair. He opened his mouth, about to scold Mira for taking its sweet time in killing him, when -
âYou must be tired of falling into holes and dying. I hope this is the last time youâll ever have to do it.â
âŠ
Starr turned his body, his heart plummeting into his stomach, freezing over from the ice that electrified his veins. There, floating in the darkness, kissed by the faintest blue glowâŠ
âHello, Starr,â Nessa said, her smile so soft and sad and full of pity. âIâm Nessa. Miraâs told me a bit about you.â
âSo we are dead,â Starr couldnât help but hiss the truth, âMira lied.â
âNo, not exactly. Not yet, at least,â She leaned towards him, moving slowly closer. âRight now, weâre in a kind of limbo between life and death. Youâll die when Mira leaves your body and Pongo takes over. Itâs just having a hard time letting go of you, I think.â
âWhy? We were pointless, in the end. They both used us as a means of achieving their own personal goals without any consideration as to my own happiness. We were an escape and nothing more.â He hissed, the initial shock of seeing Nessa turning into rage. Her smile faded, replaced by an even sadder frown. The pity even shifted into sympathy, the understanding of his plight. Somehow, it felt worse.
âDo you really think you were pointless?â She asked, âBecause the way I see it, youâre the reason both Pongo and Mira were able to heal. You saved them both from sinking deeper into their trauma.â
âThey made us live with it instead of dealing with it themselves! They were too weak to carry their memories, so they dumped the hard work onto us in the hopes we could fix it for them!â
â...They did. Youâre right.â
That caught Starr off guard, her readiness to agree with him. She pressed her hands together, held them up to her chest as she massaged her own knuckles. âI donât think itâs fair that you got dragged into this. I think there mightâve been other ways to help Pongo and Mira both. ButâŠwell, thatâs the shitty part. We canât go back and change things. We have to live with the consequences of both our own actions and the actions of those around us, as unfair as that might be.â
âI never asked for this!!â Starr cried out, the sudden increase in volume causing Nessa to flinch, âI never had a choice, I never wanted to be their puppet! And now they expect me to die!! Was everything I did meaningless? Was it a waste to try and live?!â
â...Thatâs not something you should be asking me.â Nessa said, âAsk yourself that. Was it a waste, living the life you created for yourself? Was it a waste forming the bonds that you did, or fostering the powers that you got? Was it a waste, making all of those memories over the last six months?â
Starr didnât respond right away. All of the memories heâd created came to the surface: meeting Vanala and Froyoyo, being accepted into the caravan, learning how to use water ether, creating the gauntlets to house his ether and using it to defend the caravan from indigens, playing with the littlepon and listening to their bedtime stories until the night had fallen and theyâd snuggled up together. There were memories of being awake, being alive. But just as many memories were of his sleep, the blissful and peaceful slumber. The Disgraceâs nightmares would sometimes greet him in the unconscious, but Starr never let them prevent him from sleeping, because he knew the waking world would be kinder to him. He was so thankful for that, so incredibly thankful that heâd been able to forge ahead of the Disgraceâs fears. And in reminiscing, in his gratitude towards the past six months, Starr found himself grinning. No, none of it was a waste. Heâd lived. Heâd lived the life he was given, and he never regretted a second of it.
âI lived.â He breathed, âI am so thankful that I got a chance to live.â
âYou lived for yourself, and in doing so, you lived for Pongo and Mira,â Nessa told him, âYou are Starr, and Starr lived according to his own desires. But Pongo and Mira were able to see how you lived, and your joy is what set them on their path to heal. They never told you how to live, they justâŠthey wanted you to live. Thatâs all.â
Hearing that brought tears to Starrâs eyes, and he sniffled, looking down. Only the darkness existed around them, and yet, he began to find it soothing in a way he couldnât quite describe. When he looked back up at Nessa, her sad smile had returned, and her hand was extended out towards him. He willed himself forward on instinct, his own hand getting closer, closer. A memory shot forward of himself, the Telethia self, flinging his tail upwards and launching Solstice and Nessa into the skies to plummet to the ground below. He could feel her shock, her betrayal, her pain.Â
He did not take her hand, his arm falling back to his side.Â
âI hurt you, back then.â Starr whispered, âAnd I am hurting Mira andâŠand Pongo, now, by existing. They gave me the chance to live, but in doing so, they denied themselves that very same chance. They have always deserved that chance, far more than I ever did.â
âDonât say that,â Nessa begged, her own tears beginning to spill over, âYou deserve to live just as much as they do. Iâm justâŠIâm so sorry you canât. I wouldâve given you the biggest hug.â
âYou sound like Pongo when you say that,â Starr chuckled. It felt strange, using Pongoâs name again, butâŠbut it was harsh, calling him the Disgrace. Pongoâs only sin, after all this time, was the severity of his breakdown. He and Mira had both come a long way, and Starr could attest to their growth more than anyone. A moment passed, and the warmth left his body, fleeting into the cold expansive void. He couldnât revel in this comfort forever, this chance at seeing Nessa again.Â
âIâŠI think I am ready,â Starr confessed, âBut before I goâŠcan I ask you something?â
âAnything.â
âYou, umâŠyou are dead. Do you know what comes after dying? Will you be there?â
Nessa swallowed hard, the topic causing her shoulders to tense. âDeath is like falling asleep. Thereâs not much afterwards. But for the time being, even if we canât see each other, Iâll be there with you.â
âThen I welcome sleep with open arms,â Starr said, grinning despite the pain. Was it pain, at this point, or was it resignation? Could it have been both? How fitting, it was, that he was born into life welcoming the darkness of sleep, and in death he was holding himself to the same acceptance.Â
Nessa looked up, almost looking at something specific, but there was nothing there. Starr felt his heartbeat slowing down, Miraâs presence becoming increasingly stronger. It had been a part of him this entire time, and though he knew this swelling in his chest was the beginning of the end, he could only feel gratitude. Heâd been given a chance to live, however small his time had been, and dying with rage in his heart would leave a bitter taste on his tongue. No, he refused to die with regrets, not when heâd lived such a wonderful and beautiful life.Â
I am sorry. I am breaking my promise.Â
âIt is okay,â Starr said, âWe both knew this would not last forever.â
That does not change how much it hurts.
âI know.â
âŠGood night Starr.
âGood night, Aidoneus.â
Starr closed his eyes. The world left him, and he passed into the arms of eternal slumber.
~
Good morning, Pongo.
â...â
How do you feel?
â...â
I know this must feel strange, after all we have been through, but -
âIt still hurts.â
The bodyâs eyes opened, and both were now indigo, Pongoâs color. The separation had gone smoothly; he felt no traces of Starr internally. Externally, however, this was not Pongo. It was his body, taken over by someone heâd forced into handling his pain. It didnât feel right, returning to what Pongo had been gifted, butâŠbut what else was there?
âI feel like a fool,â Pongo said, âStarr was right. I am a coward. IâŠI do not regret his creation, but it was wrong of me to agree to it. I should have been strong enough to handle my own trauma.â
It was my prerogative to fuse. The blame is as much mine as it is yours.
The planet sighed, a deep and wistful thing.Â
But we cannot linger. You know what has to be done.Â
âI do.â
Are you ready for it?
Pongo did not respond, not immediately. His hands shook, quivering with the weight of expectation. Nessa had been right, too - how many times did he have to do this? Fall into a hole, die, and somehow save the world? Why, why was it constantly him who had to make the sacrifice? Why did he keep placing himself into that role, why did fate keep insisting that this was all he was good for?
Pongo?
Pongo buried his head into the crook of his arm, a combination of cool metal and warm fabric rubbing against his skin as he attempted to push his tears down. When he finally had the strength to respond, his voice still shook, weakened with emotion.Â
âStarr was angry. He had every right to be, considering his circumstances. I always thought his anger towards me was justified, because I was being selfish. I should have simply pushed it down and gone back to NLA to continue my life. ButâŠbut I would not have been living, if I had done that.â
Because the pain you carry would have held you back.
âAnd I would never have forgiven myself, knowing it would have. I would have wanted to push through it and act normal so I did not worry those around me. But IâŠI was not strong enough to do that.â
That was never going to be a question of strength, Pongo. You are putting too high a standard onto yourself.
âI am. I did,â Pongo admitted through his tears, âAnd that is something Starr taught me. I need toâŠto be kinder to myself. I want to live. I want us both to live, and not be burdened by the pain we have accumulated. I want to drink hot chocolate with LâCirufe at his shop, I want to help Lin with her schematics, I want to get book recommendations from Elma, I want to meet people and make friends and justâŠI want to live.â
At his confession, the space in front of him grew brighter. Pongo half-expected the figure that appeared to be Nessa, but sheâd disappeared when Starr died. She was keeping her promise to him, that sheâd be there with him in death, and Pongo couldnât fault her for that. Instead, what formed was a small ball of white light, ether sparkling and rising up from the shape inside it. A little draconic tail, spined and curled around itself - Mira.Â
When it spoke again, a strange effect occurred. Pongo could hear it in his mind, just as he always had, but he also heard its voice echoing from its ethereal form.Â
That is what you deserve. You have deserved the chance to live ever since I created you. I am so sorry that your life has treated you so unfairly up until this point, but I swear that no matter what comes your way, you will never have to face it alone. Myself, your friends, your familyâŠyou are surrounded by people who love you. Now, the last step is to love yourself as much as you love those around you.
Pongo sniffled, wiping the tears from his eyes. âThat may be the toughest thing I have ever tried to do.â
It is a good thing you are brave enough to try.
Another deep breath, filling his lungs with all that he felt, all that he had pushed so deeply inside his subconscious returning to the surface with the strength he finally knew he had. Pongo was shaking, his nerves comprised of fire and electricity and a deep, deep sense of responsibility. He was stalling, right now, but he didnât care. This was a good feeling, being able to speak, able to be heard. He would never let go of this blessing again.
âI am ready now,â Pongo told Mira. âI am ready to end this.â
It will hurt.
âIt will be nothing I cannot handle.â
Pongo.
âYou should know more than anybody else that I have suffered through worse. As long as you are by my side, I will bear it.â
âŠI made a promise to Starr. I will extend that promise to you. We will be together until the end of time.Â
âMay the sun and the moons above grant us the power of the star. Let us, the humble servants, protect the land and the sea, the sky and all betweenâŠâ Pongo finished, trailing off into a quiet smile.Â
It is time. I will be here when you wake.
The image of Mira pulsed, forcing itself back into Pongoâs chest. The impact threw him into an expanse of white, and he felt full, bursting to the brim with energy about to ignite. He knew his body was morphing, morphing to accommodate the expanse swelling within him, and the resulting effect on his body was indeed a physical pain heâd never experienced before. But Pongo was telling the truth, before. He could handle it, because he knew Mira was there with him. That would always make the pain worth it in the end.Â
Before he fully receded into the back of the bodyâs subconscious, Pongo could see Nessa. She was smiling. She was proud.
He smiled back.Â
~
Elma thought she had seen it all. Mira had thrown challenge after challenge at humanity, yet they always came out on the other side. Even with the understanding that there were new continents to explore, that there were threats at their doorstep that were awesome in their destructive capabilities, Elma truly thought that nothing could phase her.
Corvhesperikonâs reawakening, its reanimation from a pile of bones, did not surprise her. Sure, Elma admitted to fearing the yggralith, especially after dealing with Pharsis. She understood the danger that yggraliths posed to Mira, a planet which was nothing short of a tasty appetizer to a world-eating extraterrestrial goliath. She would stop at nothing to defeat Corvhesperikon and see to it that humanityâs home remained relatively hospitable.
Elma had even seen Starr tumble backwards into the pit, swallowed whole by the darkness. Sheâd been firing at Corvhesperikonâs legs - minimal damage, hardly left any impact at all - when the monstrosity directed all of its ire towards the âlittle godlingâ. She could only conclude that it was referring to Starr. After all, Corvhesperikon took the plunge into the darkness after Starr fell, screaming with all the rage it had stored in its blackened heart. Elma was not surprised by this, no, she was scared. Fear and shock, though they often worked in tandem, were completely separate entities.Â
That being said, Elma was shocked by what emerged from Cocytiosâs pit.
There was a brilliant beam of light, nearly as wide as the pit itself, reaching up and into the night. The sheer force of the blast nearly knocked Elma off of her feet, but she maintained her balance, shielding her face. She heard a screech as the light separated and Corvhesperikon emerged, its wings flapping with wild abandon. Was it hurt? No, no. That was anger of the highest caliber, anger that could never be tamed.Â
As the initial wave of light began to recede, a figure became apparent. It wasnât as large as Corvhesperikon, far from it, but it was far taller than any xenoform or human Elma had ever encountered. It was white, blinding white. Every part of its body was a beacon, dimming down to the point of acknowledgement but not to comfort. A massive pair of wings stretched out of its back, reminiscent of the Telethiaâs, and its limbs were long and dangly and coated in stardust. Parts almost appeared as armor, chitinous and otherworldly. Centered in its chest was an emblem, a draconic tail that swirled around itself. From its head, two jagged horns, two elongated and pointed ears, something akin to hair covering one ear. A halo of every color imaginable shone just behind it, and those same colors danced in its singular eye like a galaxy contained.Â
From a respectable distance, Corvhesperikon spat at the figure with nothing short of hostility.
âIT IS YOUR TIME TO DIE, AIDONEUS.â
Aidoneus? Lumina had mentioned the name, Lumina admitted to seeing this Aidoneusâs ether strand intertwined with Starrâs - Pongoâs? Fuck, this was getting complicated, and all Elma knew was that Aidoneus was a friend according to Vanala and Lumina both. It had fought alongside them in the first battle against Corvhesperikon and Syriahnydra. It was here again, rising from the depths that Starr had been pulled into.Â
Aidoneus had no mouth with which to speak, yet its voice rang out as a song; Elma heard it all around her, from above and below and behind.Â
âI WILL NOT LET YOU DESTROY WHAT I HAVE WORKED SO HARD TO CREATE. THIS ENDS HERE.â
Corvhesperikon screamed, charged at Aidoneus. Its maw was easily larger than Aidoneusâs body, it could swallow the entity whole if it wasnât careful. Yet Aidoneus snapped out of existence, reappearing by Corvhesperikonâs left flank and throwing balls of energy directly into its side. Finally, attacks that did noticeable damage to the yggralith, noticeable and painful. Elma could only stand and stare, watching the exchange unfold in the sky above. A tinge of orange on the horizon, an indication that the dawn was close to greeting them. Did the sun want so badly to witness this fearsome battle? Elma had to admit she was thankful for the dawn, for the chance at seeing a new day grace the world. But for now, the darkness was nearly all there was, save for Aidoneusâs everlasting glow.
âFriend Elma!!â Vanala sprinted over, her wings balled up behind her. Her fire ether sparked in her hands, her gloves turning red from the flames. âNeed to get far away from here!! Take Sprinkle Sprinkle and run!!â
âI wonât leave,â Elma spoke before she could fully think things through. Wait, Vanalaâs idea was smart - what help could she possibly provide? But there was this nagging feeling in her heart, a need to remain behind and see things through to the end. Was Aidoneus a permanent resident? Was Starr dead? By extension, was Pongo dead? Fuck, FUCK. Elma reiterated her stance, âAidoneus may still yet need our help.â
Vanala looked up at her, and somehow, she mustâve known there would be no convincing Elma out of her current plan. âVanala will help Aidoneus. But friend Elma canât fly, and -â
âLOOK OUT!!â
Froyoyo charged at the two, carrying Sprinkle Sprinkle in his wings. Behind him, Aidoneus was tossed into the side of the mountain, Corvhesperikon roaring in absolute delight at getting a hit in. The resulting impact brought down debris, sprinkled in with snow and rubble and boulders the size of houses. That was not what Froyoyo warned them against, however. Corvhesperikon circled the mountain perimeter in the hopes of repositioning and getting a better angle on another attack, and in doing so, it swept low to the ground, its claws mere inches away from slicing through the snow. Elma lept to the side, dodged with a swiftness sheâd perfected over the years. Vanala flew up, lingered by Elma and Froyoyo even though everything about her suggested she wanted to give chase.Â
Aidoneus never made contact with the ground, but it dipped in a moment of recovery from the blow it had received. By the time Corvhesperikon returned to re-engage, it was charging more energy-based attacks to throw at its body, and still every hit made its mark, still every hit burned through the layer of feathers protecting the flesh and bone beneath. Elma was in awe, tracking the battle and maintaining close visual contact with Aidoneus. Even with Vanalaâs help, weakened after the first battle, would Aidoneus be able to defeat Corvhesperikon? There had to be something, some way she could make a difference, it was torture just standing by while the fate of the world was decided in a matchup between two godlike entities -
What the hell was that?!
Another screech, beyond the horizon of snow-peaked mountains. That didnât belong to Corvhesperikon. It couldnât belong to Aidoneus, no? No. Something was flying towards them, something with long crystalline wings, yellow shards of ether mimicking the movement of feathers. Elma couldnât contain her smile, the single laugh that escaped her mouth.Â
âHello again, Solstice!â Elma called out. Telethia, the Endbringer responded with another screech - they heard her, they knew, and they were happy to see her again. But kicking Corvhesperikonâs ass was their duty, and their duty came before all else.Â
Aidoneus looked over its shoulder. Curse that form for not having a mouth, because Elma was certain it was happy to see Solstice, happy enough that it would have smiled. A resolute nod later, and the two were tag teaming blasts at Corvhesperikon. Man, maybe Elma didnât need the sun to rise after all. Solstice and Aidoneus were doing just fine pushing the darkness back on their own.Â
âGo, mamapon, go!!â Sprinkle Sprinkle cheered, drawing Elmaâs attention for long enough that she saw Vanala push herself up into the air with her wind ether, joining the fray. Her attacks had hardly left a mark before, and they didnât do much now, but Elma had to admire Vanalaâs willingness to fight despite the odds. Froyoyo had placed the littlepon down in the snow, watching the scene just as intently. That was worry there, in his eyes, that familiar shine of hope and concern. Elma wished she could reassure him that this wouldnât be as devastating as the first time he had fought against Corvhesperikon, but how could she say that in due confidence? She wasnât there. She hadnât seen the devastation all those centuries ago.Â
Solstice dove down onto Corvhesperikonâs back, her claws digging into its flesh and ripping chunks out one by one. It wasnât a pretty sight, far from it, and yet Elma felt resolute pride in how effective their attacks were. Lightning cascaded off of their body, a storm of ether surging straight into the freshly formed wounds. Corvhesperikon screamed, its neck suddenly swiveling as it tried to bite at Solstice. Solstice darted out of the way long before the yggralith was able to land a hit; in this form, they had access to its mind, its thoughts, its plans. And even without that ability, she was fast, terrifying so even for her size. Elma remembered her very first encounter with Solstice, back in Noctilum, back when she and her team had been fighting the Sphinxes. Even then sheâd displayed an intergalactic strength, an unparalleled speed - a recognition that Elma hadnât been able to decipher. Now, looking back, she knew that Solstice had been bowing her head to Pongo, to Mira, to the body they inhabited together and to the being that gave her purpose.Â
Aidoneus released another powerful blast of ether, directing the energy towards Corvhesperikonâs face. It flinched backwards, shaking its head. It swung its claws in every direction, blinded for the time being but still enraged enough to keep fighting. Aidoneus floated, hands balling up into fists as it spoke to Solstice and Vanala.
âKEEP THE BEAST OCCUPIED.â
Solstice roared again to convey their understanding, and Vanala reacted with a hearty cheer. âVanala do her best! Send Corvie to hell!!â
And off the two went, unleashing blast after blast into the yggralithâs flank. Corvhesperikon kept swinging in each direction, its focus constantly switching and propelled by blind rage. It snapped at Vanala, and the Nopon was able to just barely dodge out of the way. She was hardly visible when paired against the other three beings, an insignificant speck spouting fire and ice and lightning. She had speed on her side, however, and she used that to her advantage. Solstice continued drawing most of Corvhesperikonâs ire, flipping onto their stomach to release a beam of ether out of their mouth and into the yggralithâs neck. Corvhesperikon screamed, and quicker than anticipated, it struck at Solstice with a mangled talon that rivaled their size. Solstice wasnât able to dodge the attack and took the brunt of the damage, faltering and falling a couple hundred feet out of the air. Speckles of blood dripped down to the snowy surface, an impromptu rainfall. Elma flinched as the wind carried some over towards her, not far enough to stain her armor but far enough to leave a mark a few feet away from where she stood.
With Solstice out of commission for a short period of time, Corvhesperikon was able to direct all of its attention towards Vanala. Elma cried out a warning, but it came too late, it came without enough strength to carry it to her ears. Corvhesperikon lunged, and in one fell swoop, it snatched Vanala up into its jaws. She had no time to react and disappeared from Elmaâs view, trapped within its maw.
âVANALA!!!â Froyoyo cried, his voice cracking from the strain. Sprinkle Sprinkle watched on in horror, shrinking into their fatherâs side. Elma felt her heart plummet, thinking that Vanala couldnât survive such an attack.Â
Solstice roared, pushing their wings furiously in an attempt to return to the fight faster. Corvhesperikon anticipated how fast she was, where sheâd attack next, and grabbed Solstice out of the air with their talons, locking her within its grip. More blood rained down as its claws dug into Solsticeâs body, and the Telethia yelped and squirmed in pain.Â
But then, Corvhesperikonâs mouth began to leak. Something was trying to emerge out of it, something blue and white and shining. It tried to scream, but that was exactly what it wasnât supposed to do. The floodgates opened, and from inside its mouth, ice formed along its jawline, freezing it wide open. The source of the ice was none other than Vanala, poised on Corvhesperikonâs tongue as ether glided out of her hands. Sprinkle Sprinkle cheered at the sight of his mom, but Froyoyo remained wary, watching, anticipating the worst.
âAidoneusâŠbetterâŠbe ready!!â Vanala shouted through gritted teeth, the frost from her hands beginning to falter. Some of the ice began to crack as Corvhesperikon waved its head back and forth, attempting to regain control of its mouth. Vanala wouldnât be able to hold the effect for much longer.
Aidoneus had been floating in the same spot all this time, unmoving. Swirls of ether were condensing in the air, flowing straight into its chest where the spiked draconic symbol was ingrained. It was amassing power, but how would it release it? Was Vanala seriously suggesting that sheâd keep Corvhesperikonâs mouth locked open and let Aidoneus fire its shot through her and into the yggralith? That was suicide!! And even if Aidoneus couldnât finish its charge by then, the ice would shatter and Vanala would be swallowed up, separated from her family and her ether feasted upon until she was nothing but an empty husk, a body starved of lifeâs building block.Â
âNOW!!â
Aidoneus yelled, and Vanala closed her eyes, tumbling forward. It was a miracle that she didnât hit any of Corvhesperikonâs teeth on the way out, for the ice shattered almost instantly when she stopped supplying ether to create it. Corvhesperikon let out another painful screech - its loudest one yet, making Elma flinch back.
And then, Aidoneus let go.Â
From its chest, the ether had congregated and released into one fiery beam of energy, piercing straight through Corvhesperikonâs mouth and through its body, exiting out the other end. It was every color imaginable, a cosmic rainbow of sound and beauty. Elma couldnât pull her eyes away, watching as the yggralithâs scream was cut off and its body torn asunder. The beam persisted for what felt like an eternity, and when it finally imploded on itself in a storm of light, Corvhesperikonâs body dispersed, fragmented into tiny pieces of flesh and unprocessed ether.Â
Elma hadnât realized her jaw was slack until she forced her lips back together. Corvhesperikon was dead. The yggralith was no more.
The debris was like snow, polluted and darkened. They were the fragments of Corvhesperikonâs feathers, those that had once given it the capability of flight, now falling to the earth. Some clung to Elmaâs armor, desperate and wanting, but she shook them off. They reeked of death and rot, bitter when mixed with the cold. Sheâd rather not have it surrounding her.Â
Vanala was the first to descend from the sky, but her first target was not Elma. She instead ran to Froyoyo and Sprinkle Sprinkle, hugging the two with her last ounce of strength. Froyoyoâs face nuzzled into her fur, and Sprinkle Sprinkle found themself happily squished between their two parents. The occasional sniffle rang out in the wind. Elma looked up when she heard another creature descending, quickly revealed to be Solstice. She landed, creating a whirlwind of snow and Corvhesperikon debris. If Elma didnât know any better, she wouldâve thought Solstice was trying to control how hard they flapped their wings in an attempt to lessen the pollution. Their flank was still soaked in its own blood; Corvhesperikon had held it in a vice-like grip, before, and it hadnât freed them during Aidoneusâs attack. Elma wasnât sure if any of their injuries were collateral. She took a step forward, seeing the recognition and respect in the Telethiaâs eyes, and by the time her boot finished crunching the snow beneath, Aidoneus floated downwards, positioning itself between herself and Solstice. Elma paused, swallowed. She continued onwards until she was next to them both.
Solstice made a noise akin to a huff, and then a rumbling purr. Elma raised her hand, touching their snout gently. Through her gloves she could feel the swirls and delicate patterns in her chitinous body, a natural armor that housed a cacophony of ether below the surface. She allowed herself a moment to connect, to feel, to be.
âHELLO, ELMA.â
Aidoneus spoke, softer than before. Had it used up its strength, too, or was this tonal shift on purpose? Elma had a suspicion that it was the former, and thus, she found herself mimicking its tonal level.Â
âHello, Aidoneus,â She said, âThank you for saving Mira.â
âMIRA AND I ARE ONE AND THE SAME. IT WAS NOT MY TIME TO DIE, NOT WHEN I HAVE SO MUCH LEFT TO DO.â
Ah, that explained a few things. Elma smiled at the realization, the conclusion that Aidoneus was the being Mira had once been and the reason the planet was sentient to begin with. But that connection also harbored another question, one that she wasted no time in asking.
âIf youâre Mira, then what happened to Po -â
Wait. No, he said that wasnât his name. That hurt, that hurt so badly. She corrected herself despite the pain.
â- to Starr?â
Aidoneus seemed to recognize this tension, averting its gaze for a moment. Elma expected bad news - how could you feel good about an answer when the other party wouldnât meet your eyes? But when it spoke again, it was with a combined softness. Yes, it was weakened, and that was affecting its volume. But there was a love there, too, a compassion so deep that Elma could feel it through every part of her being.
âTHIS IS A TEMPORARY FORM I CAN TAKE. PONGO AGREED TO RESUME CONTROL ONCE I HAVE REVERSED THE TRANSFORMATION. HE HAS MADE PEACE WITH HIMSELF, THOUGH HE WILL STILL NEED TIME TO HEAL. I THOUGHT I COULD HELP, BUTâŠBUT I MADE THINGS WORSE. I REALIZE THAT NOW.â
A pause.
âWILL YOU BE THERE FOR HIM? HE WILL NEED YOU AND HIS FRIENDS NOW MORE THAN EVER.â
âAlways,â Elma didnât hesitate in her response, âBut if youâre really Mira, then you must know that Pongo needs you just as much as he needs us.â
â...I DO NOT KNOW IF I BELIEVE YOU. HE IS WHO HE IS TODAY BECAUSE OF HUMANITY - BECAUSE OF YOU.â
âSound like friend Aidoneus donât know value of self,â Vanala piped up, having walked over with Froyoyo and Sprinkle Sprinkle by her side. Eye bags were beginning to form under her eyes, tired yet still shining with compassion. âDoes Vanala need to sit Aidoneus down for pep talk like Vanala did with Starr?â
Aidoneus chuckled at that. âNO, THAT WILL NOT BE NECESSARY. BUT I ADMITâŠI HAVE THINGS I MUST COME TO TERMS WITH REGARDING MYSELF. PONGO WILL NEED TO DO THE SAME.â
âAnd weâll be there for him every step of the way,â Elma reaffirmed, âThank you again, Aidoneus.â
âMany thanks indeed,â Froyoyo said, âWere it not for Aidoneus, wifeypon would beâŠâ He shuddered, the mental image giving him pause. âSecond time now that Aidoneus saved world. Makes you honorary Heropon in Froyoyoâs book.â
â...AN HONORARY HEROPON?â
âNot as cool as Legendary Heropon. Froyoyo still Legendary Heropon of Cocytios. Honorary Heropon like sidekick.â
âI CERTAINLY FEEL HONORED BY THAT. THANK YOU, FROYOYO.â
âMeh meh!! No reason dadapon and Aidoneus canât both be Legendary Heropon!!â Sprinkle Sprinkle pouted, âBoth heroes! Both heroes Sprinkle Sprinle forever look up to!!â
Aidoneus chuckled again, reaching down to pat Sprinkle Sprinkleâs head. The height difference between the two was laughable, even more so when Aidoneus returned to its previous stature. It looked off into the distance, to the pit that it had emerged out of. âEVERYONE, FOLLOW ME. IT IS TIME.â
And off Aidoneus floated towards the edge without further explanation. Was it needed, when they all knew what was going to happen? Elma and the Nopon followed silently, though moments after their first steps the ground below them shook. Sprinkle Sprinkle was the only one who looked outwardly panicked, and Elma couldnât blame them. It was Solstice behind them, the great and powerful Telethia, attempting to follow as well. She made eye contact with the littlepon, and after that, all of her steps were calculated, softer.
The sunrise was beginning to dominate the night, midnight mixing with the oranges and yellows of the dawn. As everyone congregated by the cliffside, Aidoneus turned back towards the group, making a request.
âI ASK THAT NO ONE HERE SPEAKS OF ME, OR WHAT HAPPENED THIS DAY. I DO NOT WANT TO CAUSE ANY UNNECESSARY CONCERN, NOR DO I WANT HUMANITY TO RELENTLESSLY PURSUE ME IN THE HOPES OF ANSWERING THEIR QUESTIONS.â
âHumans are a naturally curious race,â Elma said, âBut I understand. I promise BLADE and those who live inside NLAâs borders will not hear of this.â
âTHANK YOU AGAIN.â
A pause.
âTHE EARTH WOULD BE PROUD OF YOU. FOR HOW FAR YOU HAVE COME, AND FOR HOW YOU HAVE GROWN.â
Elma wasnât sure what to make of those unspoken implications, but she could feel the sentiment, the nostalgia dripping through Aidoneusâs voice. All she could do was smile, nod, watch as Aidoneus flew upwards and then descended into the darkness of the pit. The same beam of light that had graced its entrance to Cocytios returned, though nothing emerged from it for quite a while. When something finally did begin to take shape, Elma observed with keen interest. There was a torso, arms, legs, a head. As the light began to fade, more details became apparent - black hair, pale skin. Elma got her hopes upâŠ
Until she recognized Starrâs armor.Â
Starr descended down from the light, eyes closed and body limp. His hair was short like Pongoâs, and the scars across his right cheek were gone. Maybe this was Pongo. He fell into Elmaâs arms just as the light vanished, and Elma turned him over so that he lay in her arms. The moment reminded her of when sheâd first met Pongo, that fateful day in Starfall Basin. How time had flown past them, how time had treated Pongo. If she could only go back in time and warn him then about all the pain heâd bear, all the loss and tragedyâŠ
No. There was only the present, there was only the gift of today. Elma had to make it count, and sheâd make sure Pongo made it count, too.
Softly, gently, Elma spoke.
âWake up, Pongo.â
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Imperium 3: Chapter 6
Redi ad me. (Come back to me.)
Starr immediately began running back to the others, parts of the above stalactites beginning to crumble and fall around him from the impact. Some of the pebbles bounced off of his breastplate and head, but none were big enough to hurt him.
Everyone was waking up in the other room, with Elma being the most alert of the group. Her dual guns were in her hands, armed and ready for whatever came next. Starr stopped in front of her, explaining quickly.Â
âWe need to go. We know what must be done to stop Corvhesperikon, but we need to get Vanala out of here first.â
âFriend found way to beat Corvie?â Sprinkle Sprinkle questioned, his mother now wide awake beside him. âW-Wait, what about friend Lumi?? Canât leave her here!!â
Lumina smiled at this, surprised that anyone had taken to her wellbeing in the midst of the shaking cavern walls, the debris falling from the ceiling. âG-Go. Iâll be f-f-fine here, for n-now.â
The entire team looked between each other, eyes wide with pity, with remorse. Starr clenched his jaw, knowing that she was right, they couldnât afford to waste any time here. If she had lived in his cavern for so long without the ability to move, then the reasonable thing to do would be to get out of this cavern, get out and draw Corvhesperikon away from her. And thenâŠ
âWe made the promise before, and we promise you again: we will return for you,â Starr swore, quickly kneeling down and taking Luminaâs hand within his own. Her fingers slid between his, cold metallic joints that shimmered with the faintest golden light. âOne way or another, we will come back, and we will find a way to heal you.â
Lumina sniffled, touched by his words, his sentiment. âI kn-know you will. Good luckâŠb-both of you.â
Both of you.
Starrâs shoulders relaxed. Mere hours before, he wouldâve been confused, hurt, angry - but now there was nothing. Nothing but the overwhelming feeling of knowing that he couldnât run from who he was. The Disgrace could run as much as he wanted, he could cower behind this façade and never speak again for fear that he would destroy more than heâd repair -
âStarr!â
He quickly turned around as Elma called his name, a slight bounce to her step as the ground shook once more and her anxieties became more visible. Starr squeezed Luminaâs hand once last time before letting go, hesitant, taking in her image one last time before joining the others. He scooped up Sprinkle Sprinkle as they all began to make their way out of the cavern, through another passage veering to the right of Luminaâs spot. More roars pierced through the mountain, deafening and rattling the stonework that created the cavern system. More stalactites tumbled to the ground around them; Elma sidestepped to avoid a large one as they ran through the darkness, illuminated by Vanalaâs small flame.
It was nearly impossible to see the exit to the cavern once they reached it. The night had consumed the outer world, a dark void that no stars dared to alter. It was only the snow that indicated the transition, the white that counteracted the darkness from the ground up. The second that the snow crunched below Starrâs boot, Corvhesperikon screeched again, much closer than before. Everyone continued to run forward, with Elma holding her guns tightly, Vanala keeping her fire ether at the ready in her wings. With Sprinkle Sprinkle still in his arms, Starr wasnât able to bring up either of his ether weapons, but he was afforded the chance - the risk - to look behind him. Sure enough, Corvhesperikon grasped the side of the mountain, neck outstretched to the sky and rocks crumbling under its uneven claws. Its wings stretched out to their fullest extent, far larger than the mountain it deigned to perch upon, and it shook its head rapidly as if it was trying to knock something off of its skull. At the same time Starr realized what the little figure on its head was, Sprinkle Sprinkle called out, âDadapon!!â
Sure enough, Froyoyo was still in the midst of battling the fearsome feathered monstrosity, brandishing his broadsword above his head. The blade was coated in Corvhesperikonâs blood, inky black and dripping onto Froyoyoâs patterned white fur. He kept slicing and hacking at the yggralith with everything he had, and reassured that heâd buy them some more time to run, Starr picked up his pace. Starr thought this would be enough to keep the beast distracted while they made their escape, but like a moth to a flame, Corvhesperikon turned its attention to the group below. Beady eyes trained on Starr and Sprinkle Sprinkle, and despite his best efforts, Froyoyo was incapable of keeping it away. The yggralith screeched, its wings extending into the night, and as it dived from the top of the mountain, Froyoyo tumbled off, hitting the side of the cliff on his descent. The impact looked painful; it was like Starr could feel the rocks digging into his skin, drawing blood and ire from each blow.Â
Starr surged ahead, realizing heâd been watching far too long. He couldnât outrun Corvhesperikon and heâd be a fool to believe he could. But as the ground shook, as Corvhesperikon landed and charged after him, Starr sensed an incoming attack and dove into a somersault, narrowly avoiding Corvhesperikonâs claws while keeping Sprinkle Sprinkle out of harmâs way. He kept running, kept Vanala and Elma in his line of sight. Elma checked on Starr with a quick glance over her shoulder. She mustâve sensed his fear, or created some of her own, for moments later her steps began to leave a trail behind them. They were so hard to see, shadows amongst a shadowed world, but the Disgrace lent his knowledge to Starr. Ghost Factory. A decoy Art generated from dual guns, applicable to the self and every party member within a certain radius.
Starr watched as copies of him danced around his person, mimicking his appearance, his movements, his fear. Corvhesperikon screamed, attempting to grab Starr and knocking a row of clones out of existence. Just because he was under the effects of the decoy didnât mean he was guaranteed safety. His legs burned, stumbling through uneven patches of snow, only barely scraping the true surface of Cocytios hidden beneath. He forced himself to keep his head forward, donât look behind him, donât look -
Wait, what was that, in front of them?
The white expanse of snow turned into pure darkness, the ground falling away into an endless pit. It was still far enough away that he didnât have to be concerned about falling in, butâŠ
But that was where the Disgrace died. Where Starr - the monster, the feared, the terrified and uncontrolled - was killed.Â
That little discovery, that moment of hesitation that followed, was enough for Corvhesperikon to swipe Starr from behind and knock him out of his path. He tumbled for a considerable distance, and he felt Sprinkle Sprinkle leave his grip despite his best efforts to hold on. The littlepon yelped, and Starr lost track of them, landing face first into the snow. His mask pressed up against his face at an awkward angle before it flew off, one of the teeth grazing his forehead. A moment of panic, needing to hide behind something so his face was obscured, and he was back on his feet, frantically looking for his maskâs signature blue and purple horns. Right when he saw the colored tinge in the snow, another screech emanated from the beast, and Starr didnât have time to dodge yet another swipe from its massive talons. They tore clean through his cape this time, drawing blood along his back as he landed once more in the snow. This time, he was fortunate enough - unfortunate, maybe - to land on his back, facing Corvhesperikon head on. And even worse, a flicker of movement in the corner of his eye. Sprinkle Sprinkle, running towards Starr.
Thankfully he didnât have to be concerned about Sprinkle Sprinkleâs interference for very long, because Vanala swooped in and scooped the littlepon up in her wings. She flew into the air, her wind ether carrying her up and away. Corvhesperikon was distracted, the short reprieve giving Starr enough time to stand up, to brace himself, to produce his water ether weapons. Two swords this time - the need for a shield would come, but in advantageous moment, the offensive strategy was the right call in his eyes.Â
He sprinted forward, climbing onto one of Corvhesperikonâs massive talons and plunging his blades directly into its leg. Corvhesperikon screamed, shaking its leg to try and throw Starr off. But he kept his blades firmly lodged into the blackened skin, the water ether connected to his gauntlets and ensuring he stayed put. A blast of wind ether drew its attention once more, and Vanala appeared, minus Sprinkle Sprinkle. He assumed that theyâd been deposited with Elma, or at least taken somewhere safe and away from the chaos.Â
Vanalaâs wings extended, the veins in her gloves glowing a bright green. âCome and fight, coward Corvie! Vanala refuse to run while Corvie hurt friends!â
The yggralith stared her down, but then it laughed, something hideous and sinister that made Starr feel sick to his stomach. âYOU THINK YOU STAND A CHANCE AGAINST ME?? PATHETIC LITTLE CREATURE, SO SMALL, SO FRAIL????â
âVanala not small!!â She shouted, launching another torrent of wind ether directly into Corvhesperikonâs face. Starr grimaced, realizing it didnât leave nearly as much of an impact as it had before. Corvhesperikon bared its teeth at Vanala, mimicking a smile with its beak.
âSMALLER THAN FIRST ENCOUNTER,â Corvhesperikon said, âTOO SMALL TO TARGET NOW.â
That made Starr freeze. Heâd heard Corvhesperikon calling out, telling the âlittle godlingâ to stop, to give up. Though heâd never vocalized it, heâd always assumed that the yggralith was targeting Vanala, just as it had all those years ago. The confession made Vanalaâs eyes widen, mixed with her scowl of abject confusion.Â
âCorvie too scared to fight Vanala, then?â
Somehow, Corvhesperikonâs smile grew wider.
âNOT SCARED. PRIORITIZING.â
And then, its large neck swiveled, positioning its head so that its smile, its teeth, its vicious gaze were pointed straight at Starr. All at once, Starr understood.
âWE TOLD YOU TO SLEEP, LITTLE GODLING.â
Oh no.
Corvhesperikon raised its leg, carrying Starr closer, closer. The distance was so short that Starr made the quick decision to jump off, which proved insightful when Corhesperikon attempted to bite him from his former position on his leg. He landed on the yggralithâs upper arm, his ether swords digging into the feathered flesh with little grace. He had to dislodge himself again as Corvhesperikon attempted the same maneuver, biting at him and coming up short. Now he was gaining ground, close to surpassing Corvhesperikonâs arm and climbing up onto its back. Though its neck was long, it wasnât long enough to reach Starr at this point, and he silently thanked whatever entities had granted him such luck.
He mustâve jinxed it somehow, or the gods above that had bestowed such kindness decided that enough was enough, because mere moments later Corvhesperikon took to the skies, a feat that Starr didnât think it could complete as fast as it did. The ground grew further and further away, Vanala chasing the yggralith up into the night sky. Starr felt the wind beating against his back, practically pushing him into Corvhesperikonâs matted feather hide. Frozen, clinging for dear life, he couldnât hear anything beyond the wind. He attempted to look up, locate Vanala in the ascent. She was still blasting ether attacks at Corvhesperikonâs face, enormous boulders this time in lieu of the wind ether from before, but still the yggralith was unfazed.Â
And then, Corvhesperikon ducked its head towards its stomach, its body following in circular fashion. No amount of strength could have saved Starr, not against the force that ejected him from its hide. Starr plummeted back down to Cocytios, tumbling and turning in the air with no certain grace. Too late he tried to concentrate his water ether to create some form of appropriate landing, perhaps a slide that could catch his fall. Too late, and his back slammed into the snow, his body bouncing from landing point to landing point until he slid ungracefully into his final resting place. The Disgrace sent a wave of emotion through the pain, a hint of familiarity at the event, a memory from a mission gone wrong in Oblivia. That had cost him an arm. Starr wished heâd been granted the mercy of a clean source of pain, but it was everywhere, radiating through his very being and pulsing with every second through his veins. He took a second to feel it, let it become him - nothing was broken. He could feel the pain, he could feel it, and that in itself was a blessing and a curse.Â
Starr tried to push himself back up, biting his tongue and biting back the pain. It shot through his spine like lightning, an electrical current on the verge of short circuiting the entire machine. He could only afford to crawl forward, away, away -
Cocytiosâs white snow gave way to a deep and dark abyss.Â
Starr had landed mere feet away from where The Disgrace had died. Where, in a sense, heâd been born.Â
He stared into the darkness. It would be poetic to say it stared back at him, but no, to characterize the void was to give it power over him. And yet, that was exactly the vice it had over him; it knew his past and it knew it had a vice-like grip over his conscience. It wouldâve laughed at him, if it had been given a voice to laugh with, but it could only use the impending wind to mock Starr and his untamed thoughts.Â
Gun fire rang out from behind him, and with considerable effort Starr positioned himself so that his back was facing the pit. Corvhesperikon was returning to the continentâs surface, though it hadnât landed. Elma fired every round in her dual guns at the beast, bullets piercing through its neck and body. She tossed both guns aside when theyâd run out of ammo and exchanged them for her dual swords, charging Corvhesperikonâs leg just as it landed in the snow. Vanala swung around from the side, now shooting bolts of charged lightning ether from her wings while keeping herself afloat with her wind ether. Starrâs eyes widened when he spotted a third figure coming from behind Corvhesperikon, greatsword swinging up towards its tail. It was hard to make out Froyoyoâs condition from so far away, but judging by his enthusiasm in attacking the yggralith, he had more than enough fight left in him.
It was a shame that practically none of their attacks did any lasting damage on Corvhesperikon, who was still trained on Starr. It roared, a menacing and spine-tingling thing. It raised its front leg, about to clear the distance between itself and Starr in one massive stride, but then, another burst of wind ether blew against its skull. It wasnât nearly as powerful as Vanalaâs had been, and considering she was still using her lightning etherâŠ
FUCK!
âGet away from friend Starr!!â Sprinkle Sprinkle shouted, their voice so little and weak in comparison to the mighty yggralithâs. Corvhesperikon bent its head down, its neck twisting to its right and meeting the furious gaze of the littlepon still on the ground. Sprinkle Sprinkleâs wings were balled up into fists, glowing wind swirling around their form. Fuck, they looked so tiny paired up against Corvhesperikon, there was no way in hell theyâd survive an attack, there was no way theyâd live to see another day and Starr was fucking helpless to stop it from happening, so fucking useless and pathetic and gods above why the fuck couldnât he get up -
Mira spoke quickly, urgently.
Starr. Behind you.
âWhat is it?â
If you fall into the pit, we can enact the plan.
âWe will die if we fall down there?â Starr swallowed hard, resisting the urge to look behind him. He did, however, bring himself up and onto his knees, kneeling in the fallen snow. Was that his blood, staining the white below him? Was it his shadow, his impending doom, the destiny he couldnât escape? His hair, fraying out of his braid, clung to his cheeks and to his breastplate, begging him to reconsider. Starr gasped against another wave of pain originating from his chest.Â
Yes. That is how Nessa killed Pongo, after heâŠ
It all made sense again. Mira had begged Nessa to send him into the pit, to reunite him with it so it could begin the process of recreating and restoring his body - a body he gave up to Starr in a moment of incomprehensible sorrow and rage. Starr couldnât help the tears streaming down his face now. Fate was a funny thing, though it didnât deserve characterization either. This was what he had agreed to do, and this was the path he would continue down.Â
âCorvhesperikon!â Starr used the last of his strength to call out to the yggralith, whose face was getting too close to Sprinkle Sprinkle for comfort. Its disgusting maw had opened wide, drool pouring out from between its sharpened teeth. Sprinkle Sprinkle hadnât moved an inch, waiting for it to get closer. Both turned to look at Starr when he yelled. Every noise, every crackle of lightning ether and every slice into Corvhesperikonâs body, all of it became muted and soft.Â
âGoodbye,â He said softly into the night.Â
He closed his eyes, and he let gravity claim him. One last wave of pain, and he fell backwards into the abyss. Corvhesperikon screamed, the ground shaking as he flew in after Starr. Froyoyo nearly took the dive with it, but at the last second he jumped off and landed on the cliff, only able to watch as both descended into the darkness.
Starr asked a silent question before every sound dimmed into silence, before every feeling dimmed into numbness.Â
Did I make you proud?
Neither the planet nor The Disgrace responded.
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Imperium 3: Chapter 5
Amor intra astra. (Love within the stars.)
TW // suicidal ideation.Â
Why are you so surprised? Did you really think my name was Mira even before humans arrived?
Starr shook his head. âN-No, not necessarily. We suppose it was just hard to believe you had any other name because of how prevalent it is in our lives.â
Yeah, no worries. I never said anything about it because I liked the name. Or, well, I liked it enough not to complain about it. Anyways, before humans named me Mira, before this planet even existed, my name was Aidoneus. I was what you would callâŠwell, we never really gave ourselves a species name. We simply were, and that was enough. For your purposes, however, I was a being comprised entirely of ether. I could tell you all about the logistics of that, but for now, let me show you the form I usually took.
Starrâs vision went glossy as his mind shifted, the darkness taking on new form. He closed his eyes, finding that keeping them open only blurred the new image that had appeared. This was space, this was the stars and colorful cosmos that graced Miraâs skies at night, but blown into new proportions. Starr felt like he was floating, though he remained seated on the cold cavern ground. Out of the corner of his eye, a little ball of light floated in front of him, white in hue. There was a symbol in the middle of it, too, something akin to a spiked draconic tail, though Starr failed to get a better look at it before the cloud changed shape. Sprouting from the mass were a pair of arms, a pair of legs, a pair of intricately designed wings, two massive horns and pointed ears.Â
âIt looks like when it fused with LâCirufe. A little bit, anyways.â
The Disgrace commented quietly. Starr scowled, looking to his right, realizing that he was actually sitting next to him in this mindscape. He had to agree with the sentiment, however. It wasnât hard to spot the inspiration Mira used - wait, no. Mira? Should Starr call it Aidoneus now? He supposed that was a question for the future, after heâd heard the full story.
With a full form realized, Aidoneus turned towards the Disgrace, towards Starr. Its eyes shifted, eerily similar to theirs in nature. Pupiless, colors swirling within them, a showcase of life beyond the surface. One moment they were like the Disgraceâs, indigo skies full of stars and shattered dreams, and in the next moment they were white and shiny like Miraâs, and in the next moment they were green then red then blue. The cosmos remained the same throughout it all, and in certain transitions, it was like Starr was looking through them, through Aidoneusâs body and straight through to the galaxy behind it. That feeling gave way to something he couldnât quite describe, though he tried to find the right words. Not quite envy, not quite jealousy, not quite sadness. A tugging at his soul, perhaps, that this was the form Mira had always wanted to take, and by extension, Starr wanted the same thing. Just like how the Disgraceâs desires permeated through his being, though this felt more real to him, more connected. Was it because he wanted the same thing? To inhabit a body that was more natural, not forced upon him so quickly?
The cosmos broke apart beyond the Disgrace, and a second figure began to float towards Aidoneus. This one was more blue and green, bright and consistent, though in many ways their body resembled Aidoneusâs. Rings swirled around their temple, a star-shaped crest atop their forehead. Their limbs were long, with some disconnects between the joints filled with light and stardust. Aidoneus locked eyes with the newcomer, and something in its expression softened with memory, intertwined with Miraâs continued explanation.
For a long time, I explored the universe on my own. But there came a time where I stumbled across one of my own kind. A rare occurrence, you see, so I treasured this interaction for millenia to come. We had no need for names back then, so I did not know it for a long time. We simply talked in song, and it justâŠit felt right. Like we were always meant to meet, to travel with each other. To live out the rest of our days together.Â
Space jumped forward, rushing past all of the stars and constellations until a new silhouette appeared on the horizon. A planet, yes, it was a planet. It was far too dim to be a star, at least, though the surface burned bright with magma. The heat was enough to reach Starr, who bristled underneath its oppressive weight.
You see, our kind have a goal. A life purpose, if you will. As beings composed of the essence of life, we thought our ultimate goal would be to give life to a new planet. We had stumbled across a failed attempt at this. We could feel the remnants of one of our kind within this planet, so freshly formed. We had no idea what happened, but we could harbor a guess. We loved creating answers to impossible questions like that.
The two figures glanced at each other, downcast. Starr could feel it too, the knowledge that someone had failed, the knowledge that they had found a graveyard for someoneâs broken dreams. To have come so far, yet come up so shortâŠ
I thought we would move on, after watching this burning planet for a few years. ButâŠbut she had an idea. Before I could stop her, she flew down to the planetâŠand she became it. Gave new life to it.Â
On cue, the second figure descended to the planet, losing her humanoid form along the way. She disappeared below its surface, and Aidoneus was alone again.Â
I think we were both surprised it worked, though she was so excited about it. She kept telling me her plans for this world, even gave it a name. She wanted me to call her by that name, butâŠbut it did not feel right. That was the name of the planet, not her name. I told her that much, and she decided then and there that we would give each other a name. Something to call each other, something that we would never forget even when I had to move on. She called me Aidoneus. I had a hard time deciding, so I gave her two names. Persei. Kore. She liked them both.
The universe zoomed past them once more, with Aidoneus staying by Starr and the Disgrace. Another planet came into view, less fiery than the first. Aidoneus descended upon it in the same manner that Kore had flown to her planet. Like a timelapse, the surface of this planet became immediately familiar - this was Mira, the Mira that Starr loved.Â
There came a point where I had to move on. I had to fulfill the same goal, and I could not do it if I stayed. She wished me luck, and off I went. I eventually gave life to my own planet. Created thousands of species for it, from the tiniest dronefly to the largest millesaur. I even formed the Fâlenla Aâslegn, a race of humanoids thatâŠthat reminded me of her. Her ideal form. I was proud of myself, but I missed her. I missed her terribly.Â
Now, Starr saw Mira - Primordia. The city of NLA was gone, or rather, it hadnât made its crash landing at this point in the timeline. Indigens wandered the landscape freely, unafraid of human interference in their daily lives. Aidoneus, in its non-humanoid form, floated above it all, and though it didnât possess a face to communicate it, Starr could feel its longing, its pain, its sorrow.
For far too long, I was alone. I sought solace in the life I had given, but that was not enough. Even LâCirufe was a temporary measure, an excuse to speak again with someone I wanted to consider a friend. But I was greedy. I hurt him. So I distanced myself again, untilâŠ
Then, Aidoneus tilted its form towards the sky, and there was the White Whale, the crash, the descent of NLA. Flames consumed the world with each bit of rubble that came tumbling down to the planetâs surface. Aidoneus backed up, unable to watch, yet Starr remained focused on the event that would lead to the Disgraceâs conception, the very thing that started it all.
Then, humans came. I could sense Koreâs ether on them, and at once, I knew why they were here. She was gone. Her children had found their way to me, through some twisted act of the divine. I could practically hear Perseiâs voice, telling me to take care of them. And so, I was given a new excuse to take shape - though, you know what happens from there.
âYou created me,â The Disgrace whispered, âYou created me so you would have a way to join them. Take care of them.â
You were always meant to be a guide, but never one with this much self autonomy. I was supposed to inhabit your body, after all. And yet, I was too late, and humans tore into me. IâŠI felt betrayed, in a way. How could the children Persei created hurt me so badly? The more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder if this was what she wanted them to act like. To destroy everything they touched - destroy ME. I justâŠ
âYou were angry, and rightfully so,â Starr concluded, âBut you should not fault yourself for how they acted. We doubt this was the will Kore wished to enact upon you.â
âŠI would have deserved it. For leaving her. Not being there for her.
At that confession, that descent into self depreciation, Starr found himself growing tense. The Disgrace looked down at his hands, unable to meet anyoneâs gaze, and that pushed Starr to the very edge.Â
âYou both created us to heal from your wounds,â He growled, his knuckles turning white the further he pushed his fingers into his palms, âIf there is anything we have learned from our short existence, it is that your mistakes do not define you. You are allowed to heal, just as we have strived to do. It became our burden, forced upon us by both of you, to heal in your stead. Do not tell us that it was for nothing.â
Silence.Â
âŠPongo?
The Disgrace finally looked up at Mira - Aidoneus - and there they were, the tears in the corners of his eyes. Starr stared daggers into his pathetic little form until he finally dared to speak. Even then, they were words Starr didnât want to hear.
âSo I was a failure in more ways than one. Maybe it would be better if I let you take control of this body completely, so I could justâŠâ
âWhat the fuck is wrong with you?!â Starr screamed, standing up, towering over the Disgrace. He shriveled back in his spot, eyes widening at this outburst. âYou coward, you absolute fucking coward, why are you so quick to deny this gift of life?! Why are you so quick to run and hide from the people you call your friends, your family?! Do you have any idea how much they miss you?! Look at us, look at Mira - Mira let you live. It never once tried to erase you, because guess what? MIRA LOVES YOU. MIRA LOVES WHO YOU BECAME. We exist purely because Mira could not bear to see you suffer, and you repay that kindness by saying you want to forfeit your right to exist?! You greedy, selfish, BASTARD!!â
Starr gasped, realizing that heâd used his voice to its fullest extent. The words burned in his throat, raspy and pained. The Disgrace was frozen to his spot, and Mira didnât dare to utter a word. Instead, the image around them faded, and Starr was back in the cavern, heaving from how furious heâd become. Though he was physically alone again, Miraâs voice echoed through his mind, a reminder that he still had something to turn to.
You were not a mistake. I promise.
âJust tell me how you defeated Corvhesperikon and Syriahnydra.â Starr spat, sitting back down at the waterâs edge. âThat is why you told us about your past, no? Because Aidoneus was there to help defeat the two yggraliths?â
âŠI was there. I took the second form you saw, the one that was more humanoidâŠat least, for a while.Â
âWhat do you mean, a while? What happened?â
I weakened both yggraliths considerably in that ideal form, but it was not enough. I got desperate. IâŠI asked someone for a favor.
âStop being vague. What did you do.â
âŠDid you really think that Froyoyo, an ordinary mortal Nopon, was able to slay two yggraliths on his own?
âVanala was there,â Starr reasoned, frowning.
Vanala pitched in to make it possible. He agreed to the fusion, and our strength combined was enough to take them down.
â...You fused with a Nopon?â Despite the severity of the situation, Starr couldnât help but chuckle at the mental image. It still left a variety of questions, ones that he knew heâd have to ask in order to understand better, but for now he took solace in his laughter, as subdued as it was.
Oh come on, I do not discriminate in the face of an apocalyptic event. Yes, I fused with Froyoyo. With the help of Vanala, we defeated both yggraliths. And when I left, Froyoyo had beenâŠblessed, so to speak. I had left a small part of my ether within his body, not enough that he had access to any sort of powers, but enough that he never aged.
âYou made Froyoyo immortal?!â Starr was shocked at this revelation, yet in the back of his mind, he knew it made sense. There was no way that The Tale of Two Gods, the story Froyoyo loved to recite to his littlepon every night before bed, had taken place during his lifespan. Corvhesperikonâs bones had even suggested that its body had rotted away over the course of centuries, though how could you accurately estimate a yggralithâs life cycle?
Well, yes, butâŠbut he went into it thinking that he would die afterwards. You see, my kind are unable to fuse with organic creatures. It leaves us without any sense of self, and in the slim chance both the host and the entity survive, we would wander aimlessly looking for a way to end the pain. My fusion with Froyoyo was a last ditch effort. I cannot say for certain, but I believe Vanala was the one to successfully separate us and keep us whole. I was weakened for a very long time afterwards. I only got my strength back just in time to fuse with LâCirufe to stop the war.
âYou did not learn, did you?â Starr said, âLâCirufe is an organic creature, too. What did that do to you?â
I think that is a story for another time.
Miraâs statement seemed final, a hard stop to Starrâs series of questions probing into its past. Starr wasnât too bothered by the need to change topics; Miraâs fusion with L wasnât relevant to their predicament in the present day.Â
âSo how do we defeat Corvhesperikon now?â He asked, âMust you fuse with Froyoyo again?â
Well, no. Contradictory to your question before, I did learn, and I refuse to put him through that pain again. Vanala is too weak to go through with another healing ritual for him.Â
âThen who must you fuse wâŠwithâŠâ Starr trailed off. He knew the answer, didnât he? The way to save everyone?
Despite being a fusion of myself and Pongo, your body is still entirely mechanical. Combined with the fact that you are comprised of miranium, my favored material, you would be the perfect host. Not organic, and not susceptible to the horrors Froyoyo and LâCirufe had to endure.
Starr was quiet. It was the Disgraceâs self-sacrificing nature that began to speak for him, at first, the need to put himself in harmâs way to keep everyone else safe. Starr nearly agreed with that line of thought, especially since it would spare those around him from a gruesome fate. But at the same time, Miraâs memories began to resurface, dredged up from the depths of its mind, and Starr could see the monsters in the surface of the water. The thing Froyoyo had become, screaming and screeching as it hurled attack after brutal attack, almost mindless in nature. The twisted form LâCirufe took, flying high above a wartorn planet, fires encasing the land as he smiled with sharpened fangs stained in blood - the blood of his people, the blood of the people Mira had painstakingly created. And then, there wasâŠ
There was Starr.Â
Not the Starr he was, no. The Starr that the Ganglion had transformed into a Telethia, the Starr that ravaged Cocytios in a blind rage. Was that rage really blind at all, or did he know the rage before Mira and the Disgrace fused? Did he know that this was his destiny? Would it be his destiny once more?
Saddened, burdened by everything he was and everything he was fated to be, Starr sniffled. He was allowed to cry, he knew that, but he was already so tired. Why, why did he have to be the answer? Why couldnât he just live?
â...We save Vanala first.â Starr decided, lifting his mask to wipe his tears with his hands, âThen, if it will end thingsâŠif it means we can live in peaceâŠâ
I will make it quick.Â
âYou better.â He sighed, standing himself up once more. âThank you for telling us, though. At least now, we are assured that there is a means to -â
The walls suddenly shook as something crashed against the mountainside, a force powerful enough to nearly knock Starr back down to the ground. He managed to maintain his balance just as an earsplitting screech echoed throughout the cavern, forcing his hands to his ears to block out the sound. When it finally resided, he looked up to the ceiling, and he felt his heart sink to the bottom of his stomach.
Their time was up.Â
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Imperium 3: Chapter 4
Lucem polliceor. (I promise the light.)
Rounding the stone wall separating Starr and the others from this flickering light, he laid eyes upon the answer, the answer to the lightâs source. It was not something heâd considered, not for a second.
Sprinkle Sprinkle was far too close to the source for comfort, which ended up being a humanoid figure. Not a human, no, that much became obvious upon closer inspection. Their legs ended in points, and holograms kept their biceps connected to mechanical forearms and ball jointed hands and fingertips. Half of their face was missing, jagged holographic edges just barely hiding some sort of star-shaped object nestled in their head. Their entire body flickered with light, a faint sunset color, but Starr could tell immediately what was making this light so subdued. Blackened lines trailed over half of their body, snaking up the holograms and burning holes into the dress they wore. Were it not for the light, Starr wouldâve assumed this figure was deceased, for their body was crumpled and wounded and showed no signs of recognizing other beings in their presence.
Vanala had stopped after taking a couple steps around the stone wall, eyes wide. âIsâŠno. Canât beâŠâ
Starr stuck to her side while Elma passed him, accompanying Sprinkle Sprinkle next to the body. She rummaged around in one of her pockets and took out her comm device, scanning over the figureâs body. Starr knelt down in the meantime, attention shifting between the body and Vanala.
âDo youâŠrecognize them?â He asked carefully.
â...This is other entity Vanala came to Mira with,â She explained in a hushed voice, not quiet enough to avoid the earshot of Sprinkle Sprinkle and Elma but enough that she sounded shellshocked. âNever got friendâs name. Separated in the air after Vanala and friend sustained bad injuries. Never knew where they went, if they survived.â
A fragment of Starrâs dream reemerged, a figure barreling towards the planet engulfed in flames and trailing embers. The connection was obvious, but it presented a problem that he was becoming increasingly aware of. There was a prophetic nature to the dreams heâd had the past two nights, but there was something deeper to them, something he was having trouble understanding. The Disgrace had nightmares, plenty of them, but the planet never did. It had nothing to speak of in its unconscious, perhaps because of its own composition. But these dreams couldnât belong to the Disgrace, no, they seemed too specific. And if the planet had no ability to dream, thenâŠ
Were theseâŠmemories?
âTheyâre alive, but gravely injured,â Elma pulled back, facing Vanala and Starr as she glanced between them and her comm device. âIâm not familiar with this species, but based on the bioscanâŠwell, thatâs all I can glean. Itâs almost like the bioscan is unable to define what this being is, species or otherwise. I want to harbor a guess and say theyâre mechanical in nature based on the construction of their arms and legs. If Lin were here, she could likely give a better guess, butâŠâ
âBut she is not here.â Starr finished the terrible realization, stepping closer and kneeling down next to the figure. His hand hovered over the figureâs forearm, the corrupted veins of darkness persisting down their frame. These werenât like any injuries heâd seen before, but they reminded him of scars, permanent marks of battles lost - no, that was how the Disgrace saw them. Damn.
âMaybe ether can help?â Vanala suggested, finally coming closer.Â
âWe can try,â Starr responded, lifting his right hand to join the left. There was only an inch or two of space between his palms and the figureâs arm, and with enough concentration, a gentle blue light began to intertwine with the figureâs dull glow. Droplets of water floated out of Starrâs gauntlets, drifting towards the figure, towards the veins persisting down their -
The figure coughed suddenly, weak enough that their body hardly moved, but strong enough to shock Starr and make him jump backwards. Sprinkle Sprinkle was the most unfazed of the group, eyes widening as they grabbed the figureâs other hand despite the wordless protest that Vanala gave. Starr watched as the figure finally opened their one eye, dull gray and pupiless, staring off into nothing at all. Their voice came next, staticy, broken, reminiscent of a crackling fire on the verge of death.
âI-Is s-s-s-ome-o-one the-e-e-re?â
Elma spoke first, her interest clearly piqued. âHello. Weâre sorry if we scared you, but we donât mean any harm. My name is Elma. Next to me are my colleagues: Vanala, Sprinkle Sprinkle, and P - Starr.â
Starr flinched when Elma nearly referred to him as the Disgrace, but he supposed old habits would die hard. He didnât have much time to linger on how that made him feel, however, as the figure tried to reposition themselves against the wall to sit up straighter. They hardly moved an inch, however, and Starr was too scared to help, lest they fall apart in his hands.Â
âY-YesâŠh-h-hang on-n-n. Le-e-e-t me se-e-e-e-e if I ca-a-a-a-n-n cor-r-r-ect my v-v-v-v-v-oc-cal set-t-t-t-ings-s-s.â
The figure shut their eye, and for a moment, there was silence again. When they opened their eye again, it was still incredibly unfocused, but their voice sounded much clearer than before. The crackling remained, however.Â
âThat should sound m-much better. I-Iâm sorry.â
âFriend should not apologize,â Vanala said, âVanala just happy to see friend again. Thought for sure friend was dead afterâŠâ
âIâŠI should be,â The figure whispered, âI d-donâtâŠknow how Iâm alive, at least.â A beat, then even quieter than before, âI was a f-fool. I thought I c-couldâŠâ
Having gotten over the initial shock, Starr inched closer to the figure, remaining silent as they took a shaky breath, attempted a weak smile. âBut wh-where are my m-mannersâŠm-my design-nation is Eight. B-ButâŠyou can a-also call me Lumina.â
âLumi! What pretty name!â Sprinkle Sprinkle said, in awe, âWhat pronouns does Lumi use?â
âO-Oh! S-She and her,â Lumina seemed surprised to have gotten such a question, tilting her head in Sprinkle Sprinkleâs direction, âY-You sound so cute!â
âLumina, are you able to see us?â Elma asked. The question was funny, really. Sheâd asked the same question when she found the Disgrace, with his eyes pupiless and blank. Luminaâs were similar, though there was a clearer unfocus to them.Â
Lumina tried to shift around to face Elma, but her new position meant that her gaze fell to Elmaâs left, tilted downwards. âIâŠn-no. Not in the standard sense. I-I can see your e-ether signat-tures, but n-not what you look like. Y-Yours is really hard to see, Elma.â
âLikely because Iâm a machine,â Elma realized, âIâm inhabiting a mechanical body known as a mimeosome. Vanala and Sprinkle Sprinkle are organic, andâŠâ
âWe are a mixture of both,â Starr finished, explaining himself, âWe are mainly a mechanical entity created to mimic these mimeosomes, but are composed of organic material. You should be able to -â
âW-Wait.â
Lumina let her head fall back onto the cave wall, rolling it towards Starr. It seemed like she was staring right at him, and the notion made him stiffen. She blinked slowly, her mouth pursing open as if the beginnings of a thought were dancing upon her lips.
âY-Your etherâŠIâve s-seen it before,â She breathed, âWh-What did you s-say your name was?â
âWe are Starr,â Starr reintroduced himself, caution consuming his very being.
âStarrâŠy-your ether isâŠth-thereâs two separate strands combined into one,â Lumina tried to explain what she was âseeingâ, but judging by how she was squinting, she was having a hard time understanding it. Either that, or she couldnât believe it. Starr wouldâve taken either reason to be true. âTh-Thereâs one I donât r-recognize, but the otherâŠth-thatâs Aidoneusâs ether strand.â
âŠ
What?
Starr didnât move. He couldnât. He could only look between everyone around him, the confusion and shock upon their faces, before he finally found the strength to address Lumina, to address her observation.
âWe do not know of this Aidoneus you speak of. We admit to being a fusion, but one of the original parties was not named Aidoneus.â
âB-ButâŠthat ether is unmistakable!â Lumina cried, her hand flopping towards Starr in a futile attempt to reach him, âAidoneus was th-there when w-we both fellâŠi-it put me here, in s-s-safety, while i-it tried to stop C-Corvhes -â
âWas that name of giant creature with horns?â Vanala pressed, âVanala never ask its name, eitherâŠVanala should be better with whole manners thing.â
âY-Yes!â She said, âI n-never knew where it w-went after it saved m-me, a-and I thought it m-mightâve died, butâŠâ
âWe are not Aidoneus,â Starr repeated, softer this time, âWe are not.â
âTh-ThenâŠthen how?...how do y-you have the same e-ether signature?â
Starrâs chest tightened, his breaths hollow and quick. Lumina had said it was only one of his ether signatures that reminded her of this Aidoneus creature, right? Was it somehow tied to the Disgrace, or the planet? Of course, of fucking course Lumina saw this ether strand within him, of course there was something about Starr that removed his own identity from him. When would he be able to be recognized as Starr and not someone else? Why did his very existence need to be tied to someone else, why couldnât he just move on and be Starr, why why why -
Something plopped down on his lap and pressed up against his chest. Blinking once, twice, coming back to the cold reality of the cavern, Starr realized that Sprinkle Sprinkle had worked his way around Lumina and was now actively pushing his wing into Starrâs heart. They tried to push as hard as they could, but their size betrayed their success in the matter. Nevertheless, Starr knew what he was trying to do. It was a tactic Froyoyo sometimes used when Starr was panicking, a way to bring him out of his pained thoughts and force him to focus on something else. It had been jarring, the first time Froyoyo had done it, but it was effective enough that Starr never told him not to do it. And better yet, Sprinkle Sprinkle had never done this before. Froyoyo really had become a good influence on him.Â
âStarr better?â Sprinkle Sprinkle asked quietly, removing his wings and folding them around his body.
Starr nodded, incapable of forming a verbal response. He adjusted the mask atop his head, bringing the skullâs snout further down to obscure more of his face. The planet spoke, in that moment, and Starr had half a heart to ignore it. But for one sentence, he listened, and that was enough to stir him out of his woe.
I know who Aidoneus is. I will tell you more about it later.
Starr still didnât entertain the idea of a verbal response, but he nodded again to indicate he heard, that he understood. Sprinkle Sprinkle jumped off of Starrâs lap, running to Vanalaâs side. He looked proud of himself, but his aura was smothered by a very loud, very prolonged yawn. Vanalaâs brow furrowed, putting one of her little hands on Sprinkle Sprinkleâs head and combing their fur reassuringly.Â
âWe should make camp here,â Elma took note of the interaction, taking a proper seat and crossing her legs one over the other. âIt appears Corvhesperikon canât reach us in here.â
âIt can,â Vanala said somberly, âBut hasnât yet. Hubbypon likely keeping it distracted.â
Through some demented act of the divine, after Vanala had said this, the walls of the cavern shook, small pebbles raining down from the ceiling. A screech echoed from outside, too far to be of immediate concern, but concerning Starr nonetheless. A little rock even managed to hit the top of his mask, and instinctively he massaged the dent, creating a small chip in the bone.Â
âWe will take watch,â Starr told the group, âYou all should get some rest. We will wake you if we deem it too dangerous to remain here.â
âAlright. Wake me next, when you grow tired,â Elma told him.
âThen wake Vanala!â Vanala tacked on. Sprinkle Sprinkle almost looked like they were going to repeat after them both, but Vanala quickly covered his mouth with her wing. âNo watch for Sprinkle Sprinkle. More important for littlepon to sleep.â
âBut -â
âNo buts! Get shut-eye!â
She was stern enough that Sprinkle Sprinkle didnât protest anymore after that. In fact, no one spoke a word.
~
Vanala and Sprinkle Sprinkle were the first to drift off, with Elma following hesitantly after. Starr could see the fatigue in her eyes, how she tried to resist. But ultimately, she wasnât strong enough. She closed her eyes, and after a few minutes, they didnât open again. Even Lumina had closed her one eye, her breathing far lighter than before.Â
Starr sighed, relieved for the peace and quiet. The planetâs promise rang true in his mind, a proposition of knowledge long overdue. Starr stood himself up, rolled his shoulders underneath his breastplate. Nothing felt sore or out of place, yet he still walked forward with a distinct feeling in his body, that of mental exhaustion rather than physical. He took two steps towards the way theyâd all entered through when coughing from behind him stopped him dead in his tracks.
âW-Where are youâŠâ
Starr turned around. Luminaâs voice was so weak, so small, as she tried to pinpoint where he was. Starrâs fists clenched at his sides, on the verge of a terrible decision. Ultimately his hands relaxed and he walked back towards Lumina, kneeling down right in front of her. This simple action made her smile with recognition, and he wondered if there was a time where her body had reflected the sunlight radiating from her joy.
âS-Sorry, I justâŠwanted to make sure you w-w-were okay,â Lumina apologized, âYou seemed nervous.â
âWe, umâŠâ Starr double checked that everyone else was very, truly asleep before whispering his confession, âWe are. It is hard not to be, with what is happening.â
âR-RightâŠI donât think a-anyone said it outright, b-but it sounded like Corvhesperikon i-is back. I-Iâm sorry I never asked about w-what was happening.â
âIt is not your fault,â Starr reassured her, âBut you would be correct. Corvhesperikon has reawoken and is attempting to track down Vanala to consume her ether. At least, we believe this to be so.â
âY-Yggraliths will eat any ether-based e-entitiesâŠeven p-planets,â Lumina shuddered, âLast time, A-Aidoneus and Froyoyo were the ones t-to defeat it. IâŠI was useless.â
âYou were hurt, right? Before you came to Mira?â The image of a falling body, flames consuming every limb, tumbling towards Cocytios flared up in Starrâs mind once more.
âY-Yes. B-But that was not Corvhesperikonâs doing. I-IâŠit was m-my fault. I did s-something incredibly stupidâŠâ
âWe doubt it was stupid,â Starr reassured her, âElma believed that you were mechanical. Is there some way we could repair you?â
âI, umâŠn-no. Not through h-human means. M-Mira is home to humans, right?â She replied, âI-It would require one of my o-own kind to try and f-find me. ButâŠbut none of them kn-know Iâm here. At least I-I donât think they do.â
âWould ether be able to help? Vanala taught us some small healing spells -â
âI-I donât think itâll help. But y-youâre welcome to try. I c-canât get much worse than this.â
Starr pondered the suggestion, Luminaâs complete resignation to a treatment that could end up harming rather than healing. He had no true way of knowing whether or not his ether would work, and even so, his powers were far weaker than Vanalaâs. It was a risk he wasnât comfortable taking, not when she was already this weak, this damaged, this close to death.Â
Yet despite this, determination bubbled up inside him, powerful and overflowing. Checking one more time that no one else was awake around him, Starr removed his skull mask, placing it over his heart in a makeshift salute. âWe do not want to try something that might hurt you, butâŠbut we promise to come back. To find a way to save you, to bring you out of this place.â
Lumina sniffled, and a small speck of stardust trickled out of her eye. It was the closest thing to a tear for her kind, he imagined. âTh-Thank youâŠâ
âNow, please rest. We are going to scout the perimeter in case any indigens have also sought shelter in these caverns,â Starr made up a brilliant and believable excuse to stand himself up, repositioning his gauntlets so they didnât pinch his gloves. âWe will be back soon.â
âOkayâŠg-good night, Starr.â
Starr smiled.
âGood night, Lumina.â
And so her eye fluttered shut, her battle with sleep coming to a close. Starr watched over her for but a minute longer before turning back towards the outstretched cavern. He returned the skull to the top of his head, seeking comfort in the obscurity it brought him, then walked a fair distance away from their little camp, checking over his shoulder numerous times to make sure he wasnât being followed.Â
Once heâd put enough distance between himself and the others, Starr stopped, standing perfectly still in the middle of a circular cavern that they hadnât entered before. There was a small pool of water in the far corner, a gentle drip coming from the stalactites above it. Starr ended up sitting down by the waterâs edge, a lazy finger pressing down on the surface, watching the ripples that formed. A memory of Vanalaâs first time training Starr in the usage of water ether came to mind, a memory that he now cherished in hindsight but thought scary when it was formulating.
âIf friend wishes to heal with water ether, then friend needs to heal, too. Come to terms with ripples and discover that, despite ruining perfect reflection, ripples are beautiful and necessary. No water is without ripples, and no being is without mistakes they wish to move past.â
It was a lesson heâd taken to heart, and one that heâd take with him to the grave. He was Starr, and he was damaged, but he could live with that damage. None of it could define him wholly and truly. His recovery, his moving-forward, would be the true key to his identity.
Miraâs voice then broke through the memory.
This is going to be a long story.
âWe have time,â Starr said, âStart from the beginning.â
A pause. Then, the beginning.
Before I was MiraâŠI was Aidoneus.
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Imperium 3: Chapter 3
Tenebrae vocat. (The darkness calls).
In this dream - this nightmare - there was only darkness. Nothing below his feet, nothing above his head. The voices that emerged had no identifiable source, echoing all around him. He knew them. He knew them, and that was what made it more painful to listen to.
âThis form will have fair skin and black hair, a contrast of light and dark found in Siyâvalis-um. Their eyesâŠtheir eyes will be full of stars.â
âPromise me that you will continue to live, and to bring life.â
âI said I would never leave you. I will keep my promise. Just rest for now. I will be here when you wake.â
âI was created to save you, just as you were created to save humanity. Theyâll need you more than theyâll ever need me.â
He spoke, then, begging them to stop, to be quiet, leave him alone. But his words were silenced. Nothing, nothing came out of his mouth but stifled desperation.
But then, another voice. Not as familiar as the others were, but familiar. Heâd heard it not too long ago, even. Accompanied by the flapping of multiple pairs of wings, a snarl that churned his stomach, the beast uttered a threat.
âHUNGRYâŠSO HUNGRYâŠNO LONGER SHALL YOU MAKE US WAIT. SLEEP, AIDONEUS. SLEEP.â
Four pairs of glowing golden eyes pierced through the darkness, and his breath became quicker, his heart racing, gods why couldnât he fucking MOVE -
~
âSTARR!!â
Starr bolted awake for the second night in a row, knocking something fluffy off of his chest in the process. It was Sprinkle Sprinkle, the youngest of Froyoyo and Vanalaâs littlepon, their eyes squeezed tightly shut as they struggled to right themselves. Starr quickly muttered an apology and took Sprinkle Sprinkle in his hands, putting him back on his feet. Only then did they open their eyes, and only then did Starr become aware of the outside world. It sounded likeâŠno. Oh no.
âCaravan being attacked by big monster!!â Sprinkle Sprinkle cried, âMamapon and Dadapon need help!! Come quick!!â
Starr didnât need to be told twice. His gauntlets, his mask, everything was on in seconds. Sprinkle Sprinkle tried to take the lead out of the tent just as the ground shook, just as something exploded mere feet away from where they stood. Starr scooped him up, pulled him away from the edge of the tent just as it was set ablaze, black and purple flames engulfing the fabric.
Outside, the night sky was ablaze. The Desserta Caravanâs many huts and homes were already destroyed, but many of the Nopon remained standing, some with weapons drawn while others ran away. Starr kept Sprinkle Sprinkle in his arms, feeling the littlepon tense up as they took in the sight of their home up in flames. Starr knew he wasnât dreaming, but this was a nightmare nonetheless. What couldâveâŠwho couldâveâŠ
âPONGO!!â
NO NO NO NO NO -
Starrâs head erupted with pain as Pongo protested his existence, dropping Sprinkle Sprinkle to grab his temple. Sprinkle Sprinkle let out a yelp of protest, huddling up close to his legs. He crumpled in on himself, just barely able to maintain his footing. When he finally found the strength to look up again, a human was sprinting towards him, dual swords in her hands. Vanala was just behind her, a trail of water ether floating around her gloves. But behind them both, descending from the sky on three pairs of feathered wings, a monster with razor sharp incisors hidden inside a beak and four pairs of glowing golden eyes trained on Starr - wait, what?! No, there was no way, that couldnât be -
âWE TOLD YOU TO SLEEP!!â Corvhesperikon screamed, its voice so loud and booming that it managed to shake the ground just as much as its landing did. Six legs, all equipped with long talon-like claws, already stained red with blood and snow and dirt. Something inside Starr went cold, but Starr ignored it, he had to. He picked Sprinkle Sprinkle up again as Vanala and the human approached. This close, he could identity the human as Elma, the one that Po - the one that the fucking disgrace once knew. No wonder the disgrace had surged so readily within him, presenting Starr with memories he neither wanted nor claimed as his own.Â
âCorvie after Vanala,â Vanala yelled to Starr, âVanala need to leave caravan and -â
âWe will come with you!!â Starr offered himself, âIf it comes after you, then you cannot face it alone!!â
âNot putting anyone else in danger!â She stopped in front of him, pleading, on the brink of tears, âShould have expected this from very start! Vanalaâs fault for putting caravan in harmâs way -â
âWhere are the other littlepon?!â
âWith Tutito, Tutito bringing littlepon far away -â
âCOME BACK HERE, LITTLE GODLING!!â Corvhesperikon charged forward, cutting their conversation short. Vanala shoved Starr out of the way as it produced a raging ball of fire from its beak, shooting it straight down at the four. He fell onto his back as the explosion shattered the snowy floor, using himself as a human shield to keep Sprinkle Sprinkle out of the fray. The littlepon cried out, but once Starr righted himself, he checked them over, and thankfully they were unharmed. Their wide eyes and the tears staining their fur, however, told a painful story.Â
âHold on, Sprinkle Sprinkle, we are getting you out of here!â Starr picked them up once more, cradling him in the crook of his right arm. As he stood himself up, he lifted his left arm, his gauntlet beginning to glow. Focus, he had to focus to make this work. From the glow, water began to pool around him, swirling and solidifying until a shield had formed. Small waves made the borders unstable, but at least the gauntlet was connected to it, and at least it didnât weigh much at all. In seconds he spun and located Vanala, whoâd gotten far ahead of the chaos, and he sprinted after her, keeping the shield raised to deflect any incoming attacks and shrapnel. More blasts echoed from behind him, falling snow and embers bouncing off of his shield, but he did everything he could to keep his composure, to keep moving forward.Â
Corvhesperikon screamed suddenly, and Starrâs curiosity got the better of him despite every part of his body telling him to ignore the distraction. A glance over his shoulder revealed that the yggralith was squirming, its long neck arching up towards the flame painted sky. From on top of its massive head, a little white speck, carrying a bloodied broadsword in his wing. How Froyoyo couldâve scaled the beast that quickly, Starr couldnât guess. The Heropon screamed something over the wind and raining fire, but he couldnât make it out either. All he could do was watch as Froyoyo plunged his blade into Corvhesperikonâs skull, a pinprick that shouldnât have registered to such a massive creature, but ended up sending Corvhesperikon into the side of a nearby mountain, screeching from the newly inflicted wound. The mountain began to crumble from the impact, stones tumbling down its side and barreling straight towards the caravan. The landslide was far away enough that Starr and Vanala wouldnât be affected, as well as the various Desserta Caravan Nopon that had followed after them. The ones who stayed behind, weapons raised and ready to defend their home against all odds, were soon covered in a thick layer of dust and snow, disappearing into the fight. The gust from the impact then reached Starr, and he was blown backwards again and sent into a white expanse. The force was so great that he fell onto his back, but from there, he was pushed farther, farther, until he flew off the top of a hill and landed awkwardly on his side. All he remembered before the white turned into black was Corvhesperikonâs mighty roar, and all he could think of was keeping Sprinkle Sprinkle tight in his embrace.
~
It was quiet when Starr opened his eyes again, head pounding and eyelids drooping. Nothing had come to him in the unconscious, no dreams or nightmares or prophecies - that was what they were, those nightmares heâd been having, right? Prophecies, foretellings of the future, the predestined awakening of a beast theyâd seen the bones of? He couldnât fathom how any of this was possible.Â
âThere, Starr finally awake,â Vanalaâs voice called him towards reality, towards focusing on his surroundings. Starr found Vanala to his right, her water ether swirling around her form and hovering over his heart. It was only the etherâs faint glow that helped him identify her; aside from that, wherever they were, it was nearly pitch black. He was propped up against a wall, some loose pebbles underneath his fingertips. They had to be in a cave of some sort, that would explain things.Â
âIs Sprinkle Sprinkle safe?â Starr asked first, pushing himself backwards so he wasnât slumped over.
âSprinkle Sprinkle safe!â The littlepon answered, entering his field of vision. âMany thanks to Starr for saving!â
âWhat about the rest of the caravan? And Froyoyo?â
Vanala didnât respond right away, and that on its own was enough to make Starrâs heart drop. âNot sure about caravan. Froyoyo fight Corvie. Got thrown off at one point. Not sure where he is.â
Starr exhaled softly, not drastic enough to be a sigh, but enough to voice his distress at the situation. He realized in that moment that he was without his skull mask, but the absence didnât create as much stress in that moment. After all, it was just Vanala and Sprinkle Sprinkle with him, and he trusted them both. He hoped he could find it soon, though, he felt rather vulnerable without it -
âLet Vanala make light. Very dark in cave,â Vanala retracted her water ether, plunging the cave into total darkness once more, but it only lasted for a moment before a ball of fire appeared over Vanalaâs left wing. The flame was bright enough to show more of the surrounding area, as well as the fourth figure that Starr hadnât even noticed was there. The humanoid from before, the one that had been carrying the dual swords, leaning against a column of stone in the center of the cave. White hair glistening in the firelight, feathered delicately above honeyed skin - no, NO. He needed the mask he needed the mask oh gods above fuck no no no NO NO -
Sprinkle Sprinkle held up something for him in that exact moment where his heart nearly jumped out of his chest - MASK. Starr took it quickly and fixed it on top of his head,taking deep breaths, making sure he could come down from this. Vanala shuffled in her spot, looking between him and Elma with a saddened but understanding expression.Â
âSorry, Vanala not tell you Elma was here. Elma chased by Corvie, and Vanala brought Elma to safety in cave with Starr and Sprinkle SprinkleâŠâ
âNo, no. Do not apologize,â Starr insisted. âWe were justâŠsurprised, is all.â
âItâs okay, Vanala, part of the blame is on me. I shouldâve made my presence known,â Elma said, standing up and dusting off her knees with a few flicks of her wrist, âItâs umâŠlisten, Pongo, I -â
âWe are not Pongo,â Starr quickly corrected, pushing his back further into the cave wall behind him.
âBut you - do you remember me? I found you in Primordia, I helped train you, youâre an Interceptor with BLADE,â Elma continued, unfazed by how he shrank further into himself with each memory she gave him. Inside him, the fucking disgrace stirred, upset with how desperate she was becoming.Â
I do remember you, Elma, but this is not me. Gods, you should forget all of those things, you should move on. I was never worthy enough to be your friend.
âYou love hugs, youâre a horrible chef, and youâre terrified of spiders! Remember when Lin had to kill the little spider on the kitchen counter and you were so scared you hid behind the debriefing table for a half an hour afterwards?â
Stop it, stop it, I know that is me, but you need to stop -
âWe saved the Lifehold Core together! You told me I was still your friend despite lying about my true formâŠplease, Lin and I have been so worried about you, Pongo, we thought -â
âMY NAME IS STARR.â
The plural pronoun dropped as Starr hissed his name, his voice dripping with certainty and a strength he thought lost to time. It silenced Elma and the fucking disgrace in his mind, and only the ambience of the cave remained. His fists clenched at his sides, he heaved a sigh, trying to relax himself again. Part of him wanted to apologize for the outburst, but he wasnât going to. He had been pushed to the limit and she had ignored that in favor of reaching out to something she couldnât talk to. Starr wouldnât let the fucking disgrace take control back - Starr was his doing, and Starr ran the show as his shield and his truth, a truth cemented inâŠ
In loss.Â
In an inability to do anything right.
In hatred of himself for all he had failed to be.
Starr was none of those things. Not a failure, not a lost cause. He wouldnât be.Â
â...Mamapon? What was big scary monster out there?â
Sprinkle Sprinkle broke the tension with a question, innocent and pure. Vanala stiffened noticeably, but kept the wing manipulating her fire ether raised high. She sat herself down, her little legs just barely noticeable beneath her round and fluffy body.Â
âSprinkle SprinkleâŠknows Tale of Two Gods, yes?â
âIt Sprinkle Sprinkleâs favorite story,â Sprinkle Sprinkle confirmed, their expression shifting towards horror as the implications became clear. âWas thatâŠone of two gods?â
âYes. Corvhesperikon,â She said tentatively, âCorvie is yggralith, being that feeds on ether.â
âBut Tale of Two Gods says Dadapon and Mamapon killed big monsters!! How Corvie alive?â
âYggraliths not like most creatures,â Vanala explained, âYggralith only eat ether. If yggralith not eat ether for very long time, yggralith can die - or rather, yggralith falls into deep sleep. Looks like death to many. Can also die from using too much of own ether, in battle or healing own wounds. It is why Tale of Two Gods says that both yggraliths died.â
âButâŠhow is Corvie alive?â
âAfter deep sleep, yggralith regain lost ether and is reborn. Corvie sleep for very long time, so ether all restored. Still hungry for more, though, and wonât stop until he feeds.â
Starr folded his hands in his lap, his legs finally relaxing on the cavern floor. Vanalaâs admission to Corvhesperikonâs nature as a yggralith has turned into a whisper, resigned to the hands of fate. Starr tried to send her a smile, though he imagined it wouldnât help and was far too obscured by his mask to reach her. Inside his mind, the other half spoke, pushing the fucking disgrace away from the forefront.
I was lucky when I enlisted Solstice to imprison Pharsis. Corvhesperikon and Syrianhydra were far stronger adversaries, but at least Froyoyo was able to defeat them.
âHow did Froyoyo come to defeat those yggraliths?â Starr pondered out loud, in part a response to the planet and in part a question directed to Vanala. It was this question that made her melt, the stress and tension finally boiling over into defeat. A small pinprick of anger stabbed his heart, wondering how it was so easy for her to give up when there was still time toâŠto fix things? To defeat Corvhesperikon and save Vanala? What possible path could they take towards resolution?
âVanalaâŠnot been honest about that, either,â Vanala confessed, âVanala not honest about many things that happen during fight. Vanala thought she could keep secret for longer, but -â
âWait.â Elma held up a hand, suddenly standing to attention. âEveryone, be still.â
She was looking to her left, beyond what Vanalaâs light could offer and beyond the shadowed expanse. Starr slowly tried to find whatever she was staring at, or whatever sheâd heard, why hadnât she been more specific about why she wanted everyone to stop talking, was there something here with them -
âThereâs a light.â Elma pointed, and Starr squinted to make it out. Sure enough, something flickered deeper into the cave, obscured by a wall of stone. There was surely a way to reach this light, considering its fullness, but nevertheless, his doubts fluttered forward. This had to be a trick, something was wrong with this. Or maybe it was more of the caravan, the lucky ones whoâd escaped. OrâŠor what else? What else could there be?
âShould investigate,â Vanala said, âMaybe it - Sprinkle Sprinkle, wait!!â
The littlepon had already dashed ahead, curiosity driving their impulses before logic could fully take control. Vanala was up and following after him, leaving Starr and Elma trailing behind. Starr snuck one last glance at Elma, their eyes meeting again. He suppressed a shiver as the fucking disgrace whimpered in his mind, a sad little hypocrite that he felt wanting, wanting. He wasnât allowed to want this, not when Starr was here. This was his fault. This was his doing.
Elma opened her mouth to say something.
âPongo is dead,â Starr growled, âWe do not care how many memories you share with him. You were not worthy of him. None of his friends were.â
âYouâre wrong,â She told him, âHe was a wonderful man who dedicated his heart and soul to protecting others and ensuring their happiness.â
âAnd he failed.â
âThat wasnât his fault, none of it was -â
âHe sure thought it was. And we do, too, otherwise we would not be here.â
âWhatâŠwhat are you?â
Starr paused. What, not who. He was a what to her.
He kept walking, refusing to entertain the answer. He was a who. He was an entity all his own. Damn him to the pits of hell if he wasnât.
Eventually Elma followed, though she took longer, processing his silence. They continued in this silence, walking towards the light.
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Imperium 3: Chapter 2
Novus dies incipit. (The new day begins.)
âStarr okay?! What happen?!â
Vanala was by Starrâs side in an instant as soon as he woke. He tried to control his breathing, deep inhales and exhales through his mouth, but the fear was still there, the fear was just as strong. Vanala put one of her wings on his knee, and her touch was just enough to bring him out of despair. Nevertheless, tears still stung at the corners of his eyes, wildly unfocused and darting around to make sure he was still in his tent.Â
âBad dream? Scary monster in tent? Talk to Vanala,â Vanala begged, âStarr look as if heâs seen ghost!â
âWeâŠnightmare,â Starr shivered, tucking into himself. He felt naked without the mask, resting on the log mere feet from his reach. He couldnât bring himself to take it. âBad nightmare.â
âTalk it through with Vanala,â She plopped herself down next to him, her little legs just barely poking out from underneath her body, âBest way to work through scary things.â
Starr almost didnât respond. He was too pained to admit that this methodology terrified him, but there was a sense of urgency that was involved. The more he collected himself, the more he realized that Vanala should know. She was there, tumbling through a tormented sky, chased down by aâŠwhat even were those things? They werenât Miran creatures, heâd remember that. But wouldnât he remember if they werenât, too? OrâŠ
Do you? Remember them?
Gods aboveâŠ
âYou were there,â Starr explained slowly, carefully, âYou were falling out of the sky with someone else. YouâŠthere were two giant creatures following you. One was like a snake, the other like a bird -â
âStarr dreamed of Vanala coming to Mira.â She breathed, âFroyoyo told tale many times, but Vanala never mentioned other who fell with herâŠâ
âWere those the two yggraliths? SyriâŠâ
âSyriahnydra and Corvhesperikon. Two yggraliths that nearly killed Vanala. Corvie spoke to Starr in dream, sounds like.â
âWhat does it mean? Why would we dream of this?â Starr asked, desperate. The images were still flashing in his mind, so vivid and lifelike that it was hard to believe he wasnât actually there. His fear permeated through his body, and like a disease, Vanala soon mirrored his expression. The weight of the dream was setting in, its implications.Â
âVanala thinks she knows,â She told him, âBut cannot say for certain unless Vanala checks.â
âChecks what?â
âBoth yggraliths die in fight with Froyoyo and Vanala. Remains still here, on Cocytios. Corvieâs body easier to locate than Syriâs. Vanala would go to confirm body is still there.â
âLet us go with you,â Starr offered before he could fully think about what he was saying, âIf it is not there, then you will need all the help you can get.â
Vanala opened her mouth, likely about to argue, but she gave a frustrated sigh. âNot want to put Starr in danger if Corvie is alive. Very dangerous yggralith.â
âThat is precisely the reason we mean to join you,â He urged, âWould it not be dangerous for you to go alone? If not us, then at least bring Froyoyo -â
âSomeone say Froyoyoâs name?âÂ
Speak of the devil. Starr tilted his head up as Vanala whipped around, and there was Froyoyo, peeking his head out of the tent flap. In one of his wings was a stack of branches, freshly cut. Starr thought he saw a familiar tuft of pink and white fur poking out of the stack - Sprinkle Sprinkle always did like to pick the strangest hiding spots - but he said nothing to reveal the littleponâs location.
âGood morning, hubbypon! Vanala just checking on Starr. He had bad nightmare,â She explained, letting out a few nervous laughs at the end.Â
Froyoyo cast his glance between the two, squinting as he tried to get a read on them both. Starr tried to smile, though it was a pained thing, strengthened by the pain he already felt. Froyoyo didnât look one bit convinced by either of their acts, and Starr thought for certain that heâd probe into the situation more. But instead, the Heropon smiled back, readjusting his grip on the wood.
âHave Tutito make Starr tea. Tea make things better. And grab thermonana too, Parpapa brought in good bunch during gathering this morning,â He said, âFroyoyo going to put wood down, then go scout for ether crystals. Low on fire crystals.â
âAlways low on fire crystals,â Vanala chuckled, âCaravan in cold continent after all, should not be surprising. ThoughâŠno more fire crystals near hot spring right next to caravan?â
Froyoyo shook his head. âHave to go to northeast ring for fire crystals until crystals replenish next to spring. Tried to teach Rockoroad and Banan to mine, but Rockoroad very violent. Took more than needed, and just ran through last of what he got.â
âRight,â Vanala remembered the incident, as did Starr. Funny how Froyoyo mentioned that Banan was there, yet he didnât make so much as a peep when Rockoroad was flinging crystals left and right. That littlepon was an odd one, that was for sure.Â
Froyoyo let the tent flap go, feeling the conversation was said and done, and walked further away until Starr couldnât hear his footsteps in the snow. Once he was sure he was far enough away, he turned back to Vanala, who immediately hissed, âFroyoyo going close to where body is. Ether crystals grow on northeast ring, and body is just slightly south.â
âShould we go with him?â Starr pondered, âWe can say we want to help with his efforts, and then make sure the body is still there at the same time.â
âYes yes yes! Perfect idea,â Vanala cheered, âThough hubbypon may question motivesâŠVanala and Starr just lie! Perfect excuse, perfect plan. Starr so smart!â
She jumped up, raising one of her hands, and Starr promptly gave her a small but cute high-five. The compliment made him blush; had he ever been called smart before? Did she really mean that?
I never considered myself smart, at least. I meanâŠeveryone else was smarter. Simple as that.
You were plenty smart. You just had other strengths that people tended to focus on more.Â
IâŠI guess. I just wish I could be smarter. Maybe thenâŠ
Starr shook that inner conversation out of his mind, snapping back to reality. He realized that Vanala was heading for the tentâs exit, likely so she could track down Froyoyo and announce their plans to join him. He grabbed his mask, sliding it over his face and adjusting the skullâs snout so that he could see out of the eye sockets. What creature had this once belonged to? He wasnât supposed to be able to tell, he thought - the littlepon had decorated it with paint and even whittled the horns down shorter to alleviate its weight. It was a comfortable fit, and at this point, Starr couldnât exist without it.Â
He exited the tent, squinting in the Cocytios sun, powerful and blinding. It was a clear day, naught a cloud to be seen, but that meant the snow looked even whiter and brighter than before. Many of the Desserta Caravanâs members were already out and about, making preparations for the day ahead. Love and excitement and anticipation dominated the land, and contagious as it was, Starr smiled at the sight.Â
It was easy enough to spot Vanala bouncing towards Froyoyo, and Starr nearly went to follow. But of course, his mere presence had alerted one of the littlepon, and he was soon gazing down at Pecana. He was the oldest of the nine littlepon, a fluffy brown Nopon with welcoming chocolate colored eyes. Starr shouldnât have been surprised to see him - this was Pecanaâs daily routine, saying good morning to everyone he came across - and yet, with his goal and his worries so deeply rooted in his psyche, he ended up startled.Â
âGood morning Starr!â Pecana cheered, then quickly picked up on Starrâs mood and shifted slightly. âIs friend Starr okay? Looks paler than normalâŠâ
âUnfortunately, we had a bad nightmare,â He told him half of the truth, âWe are a little shaken from it.â
âOh no!! Nightmares bad, nightmares bad indeed!â Pecana fussed, âLelemon have bad nightmares sometimes. Best thing with Lelemonâs nightmares is tea and blankets! Pecana will go fetch both for Starr, stay here!â
And before Starr could stop him, Pecana darted off, likely going to track down Tutito for that tea. He sighed, continuing forth towards Vanala and Froyoyo. By that point theyâd managed to start talking to each other, and by the time Starr reached them, Froyoyo had just turned away, heading down towards a group of tents and a log pile. Starr watched carefully, waiting for the moment that Froyoyo got out of earshot. One more step should suffice -
âHubbypon welcomes company for journey. Had no questions about it,â Vanala relayed the information before he could even ask about it, âHubbypon want to leave in next half hour. Enough time to make preparations and grab supplies.â
âPerfect,â Starr mused, âWe shall grab snacks. We should be home before nightfall, no?â
Vanala thought on it for a moment. âSounds reasonable. Yes yes, before nightfall. Be quick with - WHAT IS SPRINKLE SPRINKLE DOING UP THERE -â
She bolted towards one of the tents, and perched on top was a rather proud Sprinkle Sprinkle, wings tucked into his body like a bird. He hardly registered his motherâs concerns, fluffing out as a little gust of wind washed over the caravan. Starr rolled his eyes. Heâd be down eventually to cause more chaos. For now, this was a rather tame spectacle. And for now, he couldnât get caught up in the littleponsâ antics. There was work to be done.
~
Preparations went smoothly, and Starr volunteered to carry the sack of supplies with him. After all, Froyoyo had his broadsword to carry, and Vanala had offered to hold the bag that would house the fire crystals once theyâd made it to their destination. Starr and Vanala had also made sure to put their ether gauntlets on before they left. Using water ether was still intimidating, but Vanala reassured Starr that the gauntlets would help. They were a focus, she called them in the beginning, an object that was easier to concentrate willpower into. From the few times heâd used them in routine defense missions, he liked how they felt. They were snug, but not tight.Â
Almost like my gloves!
Yeah, those looked weird. A lot of human armor looks weird, honestly.Â
IâŠI guess that is just human style? I never really questioned it myself.
I can tell. If you had, then you would not be wearing shiny leather jeans into a combat zone.
Oh come on, those were excellent pants, they brought out my -
âShut UP,â Starr hissed beneath his breath. Fortunately, Vanala and Froyoyo didnât hear this outburst. Theyâd gotten far enough away from the caravan now, moving past the waterfall and following the river downstream to the northeast. The water closest to the land had frozen over, but some patches of running water still remained, especially in the waterfall itself. In the light, the river shone like diamonds, and every indigen that flocked to its banks would eventually walk away enriched by its life. Admittedly, the waterfall was one of Starrâs favorite locations, and one of Vanalaâs favorite spots to take him for training. He observed a group of caribears making their way closer to the water, and one made eye contact with him. Starr smiled, nodded. The bear blinked slowly, a sign of understanding, before dipping its head to drink from the river.Â
The water was treating them nicely, all things considered. Though some patches of snow were deeper than others, Vanala and Froyoyo managed to push through. Starr almost thought to pick them up at one particularly bad stretch, but decided against it. Froyoyo wouldâve chopped his head clean off if heâd tried to help. They took a break two hours in, munching on some of the thermonanas in relative silence as Froyoyo kept watch on their surroundings, and soon enough they were back on the road again.Â
It was only when Starr saw the ring in the distance that he knew they were close. Even from this far away, there were gleams of red crystals, growing out of the wreckage in all different directions. The ring itself wasnât nearly as big as those in Oblivia, but considering it was buried in both ground and snow, there was the possibility of it being larger than it appeared.Â
Starr looked up at the sun, its position in the sky. He harbored that it was midday, that theyâd made better time than he was expecting. Looking back at the ring, he squinted. Vanala and Froyoyo had continued on down the slope, heading for the ring. But just off to the right, more rings emerged from the ground, nearly as large as the mechanical wreckage. Heâd seen the bones of this deceased creature before, they were quite hard to miss. That wasnât what drew his attention, however, and the very thing he spotted made his blood go cold.
âVanala, Froyoyo, wait!â He called out, and the two Nopon stopped in their tracks to turn, to look back up at him. Once he had their attention, he pointed at the bones - and at the man-made vehicles and humanoid figures surrounding it. âThose look like humans.â
Froyoyo scowled, holding a wing over his eyes to shield the sun and get a better look down the hill. âWhat flesh trees doing all the way out here?â
âAnd what flesh trees doing at Corvieâs graveâŠâ Vanala mused. âCurious, very curious. Hubbypon, Vanala wants to investigate.â
A statement so sure, that any doubts Froyoyo wanted to voice died the moment she spoke. But his silence still said everything they needed to hear, his expression still said everything he felt. The human saying that eyes were the windows to the soul suddenly made more sense to Starr than it ever had to Pongo or Mira.Â
Starr saw an opportunity, catching on to Vanalaâs plan moments after her declaration, and he stepped forward, the snow crunching resolutely under his boots. âWe will accompany her. You can start collecting the crystals as we investigate, and we shall return to you shortly.â
â...Be careful,â Froyoyo sighed, reaching his wing out to touch Vanalaâs cheek. âVanala and Froyoyo not know how dangerous these flesh trees are. Trust Vanalaâs judgment.â
Vanala leaned into his wing, humming contentedly. Starr had learned in his time with the caravan that this was the equivalent of a kiss on the cheek, an action so delicate and loving and cherished. There was a time where he wished that he had someone there with him, someone he loved, so he could give that same show of affection. And, perhaps, he could experience one in returnâŠ
I do not know if anyone would have wanted to do that with me.
LâCirufe would have.
Would he? He would be angry at how long we have left him for. He would want nothing to do with either of us.
No. Stop. He still loves you despite everything.
Would heâŠwould he love this? What we are, right now?
Starr growled a curse under his breath, silencing both voices in his mind. How dare he question Starrâs existence like that, how dare he refer to him as âthisâ as if he were some kind of beast, untamed and unwanted and completely irrelevant? Who did Pongo think he was? Nothing but a piece of a whole, heâd be broken without him, fragmented and useless. LâCirufe wouldnât love that husk of a hero. Heâd love Starr, because like this, he was complete, he was reborn. He was everything Pongo wished he couldâve been.
OrâŠno. No, was he kidding himself? Where did this bout of confidence come from, all of a sudden? Was he really reborn, or was he a broken vase put together with cheap glue, one threat away from shattering all over again? What was this solution, if not a permanent one? When would he be useless to them, when would they move on?
Starr held his breath, squeezed his eyes shut. Perhaps that would stop the tears.Â
âStarr doing that thing again.â
Starr opened his eyes to find Vanala staring up at him, a patient gaze and saddened smile. Froyoyo was not by her side, and one look over the horizon told Starr that heâd started towards the ring. He even had on Vanalaâs empty pouch, the one sheâd brought for the crystal collection. She mustâve given it to him when he wasâŠpreoccupied.Â
âSorry,â Starr mumbled, âWe did not mean to get distracted.â
âNo apology needed. Vanala just making sure Starrâs okay. Is Starr okay?â
No.
No.
âYes.â The lie was smooth, smooth enough to convince himself that it was the truth. âAre you ready?â
Vanala swallowed, her fur fluffing out with nervous energy. âHave no room to be scared. Vanala ready to go.â
Starr nodded, and the two began their descent down the hill. The closer they got to the bones, the more he could pick out the humanoid figures, the vehicles and Skells that theyâd driven to get to this point. Many of them were near the bones, holding various tools and equipment. Starr couldnât help but tap into some of Pongoâs memories - what would they be doing here? Of course, it was curiosity, a need to understand, that brought them here. Humanity had explored five of the Miran continents already. It was only sensical that theyâd eventually find Cocytios, and perhaps one day, theyâd find the other continents strewn about the planet. Exploration was one of humanityâs greatest motivations, after all.Â
Yes, all of it made perfect senseâŠbut why did it fill Starr with such dread? Why did he want to turn back already, even though he and Vanala hadnât even interacted with these humans yet? It was too late to turn back now, considering how close they were. And this close, some humans had already noticed their presence. Some had their weapons drawn, guns, pistols, swords, shields, psycho launchers, javelins, shit shit shit Starr didnât want to be here anymore this was a mistake oh gods above -
âVanala, right?â
Oh no.
Vanala had hopped up to the nearest humans while Starr stood, frozen in place, staring, watching, waiting. One of the ones that stepped up to greet her was familiar, donning red and purple armor. Her white hair glistened in the sunlight, feathered delicately above honeyed skin. WhoâŠokay, this was someone that Pongo mustâve known. That had to be it, right?
Elma. SheâŠI cannot let her see us like this. It would hurt her.
âVanala recognizes flesh tree! Friend is Elma!â Vanala waddled up to her without a care in the world. âWhat Elma doing here? Why humans interested in bones?â
âWeâve slowly been conducting an expedition around Cocytios,â Elma explained, âWe happened upon these remains a week ago but didnât have the proper technology with us in order to analyze it. Considering how far the ribcage stretches, this could be one of the largest indigens weâve ever cataloged.â
âNot indigen native to Mira. Yggralith remains,â Vanala corrected her somberly, âVanala happy humans take interest, but dangerous here, very dangerous.â
âA yggralith?â She raised an eyebrow, âLike the one trapped in Sylvalum?â
âVanala not know anything about yggralith there, but if yggralith in Sylvalum is alive, very bad news!â
âLuckily, itâs no longer causing any serious problems. That being saidâŠitâs rather unusual for a planet to be host to two yggraliths, living or deceased -â
âThree! One dead in ocean.â
âThree?!â Elma was dumbfounded, now kneeling to meet Vanalaâs gaze. Her voice went lower, almost too low for Starr to hear due to his distance. âHow has Mira survived three yggralithsâŠthereâs definitely something strange about this planet.â
âCanât say planet is too strange - Vanala encountered weirder before!â
âPardon?â
âNow Vanala should be going! Hubbypon harvesting ether crystals and went on ahead. Should get back to him before complaints start.â
She quickly turned and headed back towards Starr, who nearly followed after her. However, as Elma stood up, she locked eyes with him - fuck, shit. Every part of his body turned to ice, unable to move. What was he supposed to do?Â
âVanala? Whoâs this?â She asked, head tilting ever so slightly.
Vanala piped up, âThis friend Starr! Has been helping caravan lots lately.â
No. No, why did Vanala have to say that?! Elma knew his name, she had to remember it from when he - when he was a monster, a wretched Ganglion creation to serve as a weapon and nothing more, he had attacked her and Lin and Solstice and Nessa, gods above heâd hurt them all, he couldnât do this, he thought heâd be able to push this down and ignore all the bubbling feelings inside his chest but that was impossible when everything, everything was his fault -
âNice to meet you, Starr.â Elma said, and in that moment, Starr knew that she knew. âIâll let you and Vanala get back to work.â
A grin, a nod, and she had turned away to address the other humans standing by. None of the others questioned him, none of the others took an ounce of interest. They had their mission, and Starr and Vanala had theirs. Still, something in his heart grew sad, a longing he hadnât experienced before. Did Elma actually know? Was he being paranoid? Why, why was he so scared that sheâd recognize him as Pongo, why did he want to maintain that distance?Â
Confused, frightened at his inability to answer his own questions, Starr kept standing there until Vanala reached a wing out to grab his hand.
âVanala and Starr should go.â
âWere we foolish, to think this would help us?â
It was a whisper, a question he couldnât stop himself from asking. Vanala went to respond, likely an answer regarding his dream and coming to visit the gravesite, but the implications and deeper meaning soon sank in. She sighed, and Starr felt like he was being pitied, and his stomach churned as it thawed out from the ice of Elmaâs encounter.
âVanala not sure who Starr was before. Vanala can only say that short time with Starr has been good. Starr growing as person every day. If being away from flesh trees continues to help Starr heal, so be it.â
For a moment, Starr thought that Vanala was privy to Pongo and Mira, their fusion into one soul, one mind, one body. But that last sentence gave the impression that she didnât, and he couldnât help but breathe a sigh of relief. There had been too many close calls today, too many. Already he could feel the stress transforming into fatigue, and they still had a long journey back home after collecting the ether crystals. He had to stay vigilant, stay on guard.
âŠBut he was allowed to feel these things. He was allowed to be vulnerable. Pongo wouldâve bottled this up and pushed it aside to rot and fester. Starr was not Pongo, he was not Mira, and he would not make either of their mistakes.
âThank you, Vanala. Now, we should rejoin Froyoyo,â Starr pivoted around, taking a few small steps anticipating Vanalaâs agreement, âHe might require our height for the crystal harvesting.â
âFroyoyo will find way! Always does,â Vanala chuckled, following after Starr quickly, âThough extra height always helps. Nopon so tiny compared to flesh trees!â
âSmall but mighty,â He countered. âThat is a human saying, we believe.â
âGood saying! Vanala might steal it.â
â...Is it possible to steal a saying?...â
âThat saying too. Means Vanala likes it and might use it!â
âOh! That makes sense.â
Thankfully, their conversation was jovial enough to distract Starr the entire way back to the ring, and even all the way back to the caravan once Froyoyo had collected a satisfactory amount of ether crystals. But during their ascent over the snow-covered hill, Starr snuck a glance back at Corvhesperikonâs gravesite, at the humans surrounding its fragmented form. He quickly regretted his decision and picked up the pace when he realized Elma was watching him.
~
At first, Elma was surprised that no one had questioned how sheâd âdiscoveredâ a new continent. Maybe they recognized her status as a Reclaimer and figured her pension for exploring was responsible. Truth be told, she had ulterior motives for returning to Cocytios beyond the thrill of new discoveries, motives she couldnât readily explain to anyone besides Lin.Â
Nessa had vanished. That on its own was enough to warrant a search, but on top of that, Pongo hadnât returned. Surely a year was long enough for the planet to rebuild his body, no? So she created an expedition under the guise of simply exploring, putting down a very sparse amount of data probes. The skeleton upon their entry into the continent just happened to be a nice surprise. Funny, how she and Lin hadnât noticed it before when they were with Nessa.
Vanalaâs visit was also a surprise. Elma gathered that they were still a decent ways off from the caravanâs home base, so the reunion was the cherry on top of their journey so far. But then, there was the human with her. Starr, Vanala called him. He hadnât spoken a single world and looked like a deer in the headlights once he saw Elma. His hair was longer, braided, and it was hard to see underneath his skull mask, butâŠ
Elma didnât press it, not then, not there. But as the night overtook the day, as BLADEs settled into their tents after a long day of work, she started forming a plan. She knew the way to the caravan - even if she didnât, Starr and Vanala left tracks in the snow, and she could follow those. She had to know. She had to. She stayed awake in her tent, reconfiguring her dual guns and polishing her swords in case she encountered any hostile indigens on the road. When she could no longer hear any signs of life outside, Elma stood herself up, took one step towards the tentâs entrance.
That was when the ground shook, and a piercing bright light enveloped her vision. All she heard before the unconscious took her was a deafening roar, coming from just outside, and the sickening crunch of bones as they rose from the snow.
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Imperium 3: Chapter 1
Tempus excitare. (Time to wake up.)
A gentle snowfall, the whistling winds growing stronger as the daylight ceased to be. As the sun arched below the horizon, the Desserta Caravan retreated into the warmth of their huts. It had been a productive day, and the warmth that radiated from each of the Nopon was indicative of a bright day, a bright family.Â
But amidst the Nopon, one figure walked, a humanoid, a black sheep amongst the herd. A long flowing cape fluttered behind him, featuring small tears in the fabric, a handmade quality to it. Long, braided black hair perched over his right shoulder, atop a sharpened gold breastplate. Where there wouldâve been a face was instead a skull, a large mask to hide his features, painted with vibrant blues and purples on its two sets of horns. The many Nopon were short enough to look below the skullâs snout and pointed teeth to see the three prominent scars over his right eye, but to all else, he was an enigma, he was hidden in plain sight.
He pushed aside the flap to a particular tent, ducking down to enter. Inside were a grand total of ten Nopon, though not all were fully grown. Only one was large enough to be an adult, white fur shifting to pink by the top of his head, a fur coat covering his body. This was Froyoyo, the Legendary Heropon, his resting scowl now transformed into a theatrical grin as he waved his wings with grandeur. All of his littlepon stacked on top of each other on their bed, entranced by the story he was telling them and far from their slumber.
â...two gods create all of universes,â Froyoyo continued, hardly minding the figureâs entry into the tent, âAs well as all life itself. Then, gods disappear without trace. Gods left behind ether, building block of life itself, and ether formed more life on own. Some ether beings good, but just as many ether beings bad.â
âMamapon is one of good ether beings, though!â One of the littlepon chirped, pink with a strawlenny clip in her tuft of hair. âAnd bad ether beings -â
âShush! Tutti Frutti going to ruin story!â Another littlepon, brown with beige and chocolate splotches, complained loud enough to make Froyoyo chuckle. As Froyoyo spoke of these great wonders, the story unraveling at his command, the figure sat himself down next to Tutti Frutti, who immediately took this as an offer to climb onto his lap and snuggle up.Â
âStarr is late,â She whispered, âDid Mamapon keep Starr for extra training?â
âShe did. We will tell you about it later,â Starr hushed her gently, a promise made. He looked up at Froyoyo, hardly minding his presence. This was a story heâd told before, but one that never ceased to hold the littleponsâ attention - and Starrâs, for that matter. How couldnât he be fascinated by a tale of creation, when he himself was one?
Creation? Destruction? What are we?
Perhaps both. They say things must be destroyed before they are created.
Mm. And I wasâŠ
â...and ether beings form,â Froyoyo snapped Starr out of his thoughts, divided and unconquered, âWifeypon and Mamapon Vanala is one ether being, very powerful indeed! Has lived very long life, long life where she gather lots of ether powers. Goal became spreading life throughout cosmos, very noble indeed!â
âMamaponâs the coolest,â A littlepon emerged from behind Starr, the fluffiest among them. It was none other than Sprinkle Sprinkle, and Starr was surprised for a moment that he wasnât floating. Heâd grown rather proud of his wind ether capabilities, as amateur as his control currently was.Â
Froyoyo rolled his eyes, though the gesture wasnât mocking, far from it. âWifeypon is very cool. Now stop interruptions. Froyoyo canât finish story at this rate.â Waiting for everyone to settle down once more, he cleared his throat, kept going, âNow while Vanala is good ether being, very bad ones exist. Bad ones eat ether, and when Vanala got lots of ether, made her prime target for big baddies called yggraliths! Very scary creatures, size of whole planets!â
A littlepon winced; Lalime was never one for the thrills of this particular tale or any other. Lelemon, her twin, was already fast asleep beside her, and Lalime tried to breathe in sync with her sisterâs soft snoring.Â
âTwo yggraliths found Vanala one day and chased her far and wide across galaxies! Vanala ran for long time, but grew tired. Came to planet Mira and landed not far from caravan. But the two yggraliths, Corvhesperikon and Syriahnydra, followed her all the way to Mira! Had big battle, and Vanala too tired to fight on lonesome! Luckily she found Froyoyo who came to help!â
âAnd Mamapon and Dadapon beat up two yggraliths together!â The largest littlepon, the eldest, cheered from behind one of his much smaller brothers, a yellow littlepon with a dead smile, âAnd then had littlepon and adopted Starr! Happy ending!â
âWell, had help from Telethia in Noctilum, but very accurate,â Froyoyo chuckled, âAnd missed whole story about Froyoyo and Vanalaâs romance -â
âBlegh,â The beige and chocolate speckled littlepon from before, Rockoroad, gagged audibly, âRomance stupid! Just want more fight scenes!â
âNot tonight,â Froyoyo told him, âRight now, littlepon need to sleep.â
Complaints from all the littlepon except for Lelemon, fast asleep even through the noise. Starr took the opportunity to hoist Tutti Frutti off of his lap, and almost immediately Sprinkle Sprinkle jumped onto his back. In the midst of everyone groaning about the curfew, Starr shrugged at Froyoyo, who grinned with appreciation. This was a routine at this point, Starr helping him calm the littlepon down for the night, but it never came at a small cost.Â
âCome on, everyone,â Starr said, âIf you go to sleep now, we will tell you all about our encounter with Pyotr to -â
Wait, no, that was just my encounter. Not yours.
Right, shit, I was hardly there. Just keep going, bluff it.
You know I have a hard time lying.
Whatever, I can lie. Shush.
â- tomorrow. How he knocked two Skells out of the sky, how he kicked us and our friends -â
MY friends.
LâCirufe was my friend. Close enough with the other two.
â- and when all hope seemed lost, how we spoke to him and managed to convince him not to attack anymore.â
The littlepon all looked on in wonder, enamored by this newly discovered story. Some small whispers amongst themselves, and it was decided that theyâd go to sleep peacefully just this once, all for the chance to hear the story in full when the dawn broke. As they each climbed into their respective bedrolls, Starr moved to follow Froyoyo outside, but before he fully exited the tent he glanced over his shoulder and said, âGood night, everyone.â
A chorus of âGood night, Starr!â soon followed, and he couldnât help but smile as he left the tent and encountered the bitter cold once more. A couple steps away from the tent, Froyoyo stopped, turned, looked up.Â
âStill weird telling that story. Feels like not long ago that wifeypon came into Froyoyoâs life. Wonderful blessings, her and littlepon and caravan and Starr.â
âGrowing reminiscent in your old age?â Starr quipped, and the Nopon laughed, heartily and from his stomach.Â
âHardly. Not one day goes past where Froyoyo not thankful for everything. Age has nothing to do with being grateful.â Froyoyo stretched a wing out, yawning as a bone cracked under the tension. âStarr worked hard today. Should get rest.â
âWill you not require our services for the nighttime watch?â
âHave any big scary monsters attacked caravan in past weeks?â
âWell -â
âPenginon flock walking past not count.â
âBut the -â
âCaribears friendly and not mean harm. All one did was look for food in tent, and tent hardly damaged in scavenge.â
âWhat about -â
âDusklyre wolves were on horizon. Never even looked at caravan. Nopon never been wolvesâ target, so nothing to fear.â
Starr sighed through his mouth. There was no winning this argument, though he could certainly try. âIf you do need backup, you know you can wake us up at any time. We can even take the second shift if -â
âVanala taking second shift.â
â- if something happens to her and you need a third party present, we -â
âGo to bed.â
Froyoyoâs voice had been playfully stern up until that moment, where he instead opted to command Starr in what the littlepon referred to as his âDadapon Voiceâ. Froyoyo even put his little hands on his hips, beginning to glare as if itâd scare Starr into submission. Thankfully, the Dadapon Voice had already done the trick. Silenced and rightfully frustrated, Starr turned on his heel and proceeded towards his tent, only looking behind him once to see if Froyoyo was still watching. He was, but the glare had simmered down significantly. No use parading it around anymore.
âGood night, Starr,â He called out, and Starr nodded as a reply. A part of him still wanted to stay awake, see if Froyoyo would go back on his word and call upon him for his aid. But in the back of his mind, he knew better. Froyoyo would have Vanala tonight, and the two were a fearsome pair. If anything dared to attack them in the nightâŠ
No. No, he needed to relax. That was one of the biggest things he needed to teach himself, one of the biggest lessons that hadnât quite stuck in the months heâd spent with the caravan. Theyâd be proud, the both of them, if he ended up listening to Froyoyo and going to sleep.Â
Starr reached his tent, opened the flap and removed his mask once the flap was closed. The tent was custom built, slightly larger than the rest scattered across the snowy plain. It was still a cozy fit, but in the time he spent with the caravan, he was happy to call this his home. He placed his mask on his bedside table, a log that all nine of the littlepon had wheeled into his tent while he wasnât looking. There was a series of carvings on the sides, but the most prominent was a messy drawing of the entire family, plus Starr. The littlepon had even initialed their names below with little hearts. Starr admired it for a moment; it was the closest thing to a family photo heâd ever had, and it warmed his heart every time he saw it. Theyâd accepted him so quickly into their ranks despite hisâŠdespite his everything.
It means there is hope. If Froyoyo and his family can love you so readily, then you can love yourself just as much. Just as much as I love you.
I do not believe you.Â
You will.
Starr sat down on his bedroll, tucking his legs up to his chest. He still wasnât used to this, whatever this was, exactly. The voices he heard, they werenât his. They belonged to Pongo and Mira, the two entities that fused to form him. He never once heard his own thoughts - it was just them. Only them. How were they able to tolerate each other before this mess? How could one hear the otherâs thoughts without going mad?Â
Starr removed his breastplate and pushed it up against the log before lying down, folding his hands on top of his stomach. They never followed him into his slumber, the voices he heard. Sleep had become a sanctuary, but he felt selfish calling it an escape. After all, didnât the caravan need him? Would they be sad if he were to leave, fall asleep forever? Gods above, what terrible thoughts. Maybe it was best to let Pongo and Mira have that space to themselves. For now, Starr closed his eyes, forgetting to roll the covers over himself as he drifted off into sleep.
~
Nightmares had always frequented Pongoâs sleep, when he was alive. Mira never had any dreams of its own. It was always a gamble, figuring out which one of the two would penetrate the unconscious. Tonight was a quick realization: this was a nightmare.
The skies above were a stormy gray, clouds obscuring every last bit of sunlight. It only afforded light in the form of lightning, striking in magnificent blues and purples above the snowy field. He shielded his face from the rain - rain? In Cocytios? How was that possible? No, he couldnât focus on that. He peered through his fingers up at the clouds, and instantly, a cloud parted for two little figures, tumbling through the atmosphere and showing no sings of stopping. One was pink, round, familiar. The other was humanoid, consumed in flames, trailing ashes and failing embers behind them. He took a few weak steps forward, trying to pinpoint where they would both be landing. One step, two step, three -
The clouds parted again. Two more figures emerged, but they werenât humanoid, they werenât small. These were the size of continents, their roars piercing through the rolling thunder. One was serpentine, massive blue and black body collecting lightning as it traveled. The other was black, feathered, six massive pairs of wings creating wind torrents that somehow reached him and pushed him back despite the distance between them. Eyes wide, he could only watch as the serpentine creature gave chase, following the two falling figures past the horizon, behind a mountain he didnât realize was there. But the feathered monstrosity had found a new target, turning its head and pointing its beak towards him. The, a deafening screech, beak opening to reveal three rows of sharpened incisors, and the flapping of all its wings as it approached sickeningly fast, allowing no time for him to dodge, to run, to do ANYTHING -
âTHIS TIME, WE WILL SUCCEED. THIS TIME, YOU WILL HAVE NOTHING LEFT. SLEEP, AIDONEUS, SLEEP, AND LET US LIVE ONCE MORE.â
Something cracked. He screamed into the waking world.
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Imperium 3: Prologue
Hoc est initium. (This is the beginning.)
He was not Pongo. He was something fragmented, torn asunder far past the Interceptorâs identity, stitched back together through Miraâs handiwork. He was not Pongo, nor was he Mira. Both existed here in this body, a base and a repair job respectively. It felt fitting that he give himself a new name, since he was a new person, a new life.Â
Mira had admitted once before that names were not its forte. LâCirufe had given Pongo his name, once upon a distant past, but he couldnât defer to his judgment, not now. And he was alone here, a complete and utter solitude encased in ice and snow. He needed something that felt right, something that encapsulated him now. Perhaps something that harkened back to his past, an ever constant reminder of how he came to be? At first, the idea stung, a hive of angry wasps buried in his stomach. ButâŠbut it felt right. He couldnât explain it beyond this.
And so he became Starr. The planet hummed below his feet at the decision, content, ready for the implications. This would be the first step, yes, the first of many towards righting his wrongs, becoming better. One step at a time. How many would there be? What did he want his end goal to be? Where was the finish line, what would lie in wait for him beyond that point? Could he truly heal, could he truly keep up in this marathon with so much sorrow and guilt weighing down on his shoulders?
Questions, questions. Too many of them.Â
Starr yawned. Though heâd been awake for some short moments, his body ached in ways he didnât know they could. He stumbled forward on shaking legs, eyes fluttering. The snow was gentle with him, delicately crunching underneath his shoes. Starr realized he was still in Pongoâs clothes, unbearably inadequate for this weather. But did that matter? No, this body wasnât as susceptible to the whims of the weather, not in the way mimeosomes often were. But that was a good excuse to want different clothes, to shed this identity that had claimed this body for years, stained with memories and trauma and fear and shattered dreams. It wasnât going to be Starrâs job to keep up Pongoâs failing masquerade.Â
A gentle gust of wind pushed him forward, and in the distance, he could make out what seemed like tiny huts. A memory fizzled to the surface, and for a moment, Starr called upon it. But he furrowed his brow when he realized who it belonged to. Pongo, while rampaging as a Telethia, remembered attacking the Desserta Caravan. Heâd been called Starr then - did that make the memory his? Shaking his head, he decided that it favored him then, especially since he was seeking shelter. Heâd go through the minute details later.
He yawned again. No, how was this possible? Starr had entered the world tired, heâd fallen into the snow and had slept for a long time, long enough that the sky had changed colors in his conscious absence. Damn Pongo, damn him to hell and back for not taking care of this body that the planet had so graciously constructed, damn him for never being strong enough to protect those he loved and damn him for his foolishness and naivety, damn him for even existing, what a mistake heâd been -
âWho out there?â
Starr looked up, squinting. Heâd gotten closer to the huts, to the caravan, without ever knowing heâd continued walking. A Nopon stood a few yards away, a comically large broadsword on his back and a wind poised to grab its hilt. Starr didnât dare to move, not now. And how was he supposed to respond? He could tell this Nopon his name, but not who he was, not how he got here, not yet, not -
He yawned again. His knees gave out and he fell face first into the snow. The Nopon cried out, a curse flying in the breeze, and Starr was forced into slumber once more.
~
â...collapsed outside caravan! Froyoyo had to drag body to hut all by himself!â
âNo complaining, hubbypon! Did right thing and saved flesh treeâs life by doing so - Tutti Frutti, what mamapon tell you about coming in unannounced? Very busy right now!â
Starrâs eyes fluttered open, his vision unclear. He felt warm, and he quickly discovered he was underneath quite a few blankets. He shifted, trying to look around, gauge his surroundings, when a rather round pink furball blocked his view, staring down at him with wide blue eyes. A Nopon, yes, a very concerned Nopon who seemed relieved that he was awake.
âHubbypon, get littlepon to grab thermonanas! Flesh tree is awake!â She urged someone outside of Starrâs field of vision before turning back to him. âHow flesh tree feeling? What flesh tree doing outside all alone?â
A question that prompted an answer. Starr was granted the opportunity to speak, to test out his voice with someone who wasnât himself. Something about it made him nervous, and so he quivered with each word that left his lips. His voice echoed, indicative of the two beings that had fused into one, and almost immediately the Noponâs interest was piqued.Â
âWe wereâŠwe were tired. We have had a long day and did not know where to seek shelter.â
âHmph! Good thing hubbypon found you then,â She admitted with a flap of her wings. âCaravan best shelter in all Cocytios. If flesh tree had stayed out there much longer, cold wouldâve taken you!â
âWe are aware of the dangers,â Starr responded, âAnd we did not mean to cause any trouble -â
âNo trouble! Always happy to help,â She interrupted, âNow, where Vanalaâs mannersâŠVanala is Vanala! What new friendâs name?â
I am Pongo, with the Interceptors.
I am Mira, the planet you stand on.
He sat himself up, pushing some of his hair away as strands went to block his face. Vanalaâs wings extended, positioned near his back in case he lost balance. But as he crossed his legs in the makeshift bed, as his hands clutched the blankets that had fallen around him, piled up like the snow heâd tried to avoid outside, Starr gave an answer he didnât have time to regret.
â...We are Starr. Just Starr.â
Familiarity hit Vanala in an instant. He could see the war inside her, the confusion, the pain. A memory flashed in Starrâs mind, one of a tiny caravan below his feet, a fight with humans and a native Miran calling his name as he flew back into the clouded skies, annoyed at the wounds heâd sustained, annoyed that he couldnât toss around a Nopon or two -
Shit.
âStarr was name of big furry dragon that attacked caravan not long ago according to Sollypon.â Vanala whispered, âBut friend claims same nameâŠis friendâŠâ
This had to be the first step forward. There was no denying this part of Starrâs past, and it was perhaps the easier of many steps heâd have to take. He didnât have the heart to admit that heâd taken the name for a reason, a reason buried in self-deprecation and guilt and a constant reminder of the darkness inside of him, but he was strong enough to recognize the need for an apology. His name had taken responsibility for his actions. To cower from the truth was to grant Pongo more respect than he deserved.
âWe were the Telethia that attacked your caravan,â Starr explained quietly, âIt is a long story, but weâŠwe were not in our right mind. It was thanks to Solstice and their companions that we were able to come back from that state. WeâŠthere are not enough words to describe our guilt. We are sorry that we caused this pain.â
A pause, a flicker in time where no words were spoken, where silence became them both. Starr blinked, and in that short reprieve of darkness, Vanala chuckled. âStarr need not apologize. Vanala just happy everything worked out. No Nopon in Desserta Caravan were hurt during attacks, though hubbypon argue his pride took good beating. ThoughâŠVanala very curious about how flesh tree can become Telethia. Is right only for Fâlenla Aâslegn, no?â
I became a monster thanks to the Ganglion. Humanity has nothing to do with it.Â
Though you were never truly human, were you? You were always my creation. A mirror of humanity, no doubt, but not truly human.
Perhaps. DidâŠdid you try to fight it? When -
They erased me from you. I could not even if I wanted to, which is why I am -
âStarr?â
Starr shook his head. âYes, our apologies. We were lost within ourselves. You were inquiring about how we were able to transform?â
âYes yes! Though if question too sensitive for Starr -â
âNo, it just requires more of an explanation than you likely think,â Starr interrupted. At least he could explain that part of himself, at least he could divulge that aspect of Pongo without caving in on himself. After all, it was one of the biggest parts of Pongo that he had to live with. An avatar and its creator, one in body and mind and soulâŠ
âWell, Vanala suggests rest for now! Feel free to tell Vanala story after Starr has gotten some sleep,â She patted his shoulder, âAnd when Starr wakes, littlepon will have brought thermonanas! Should warm Starr right up.â
âRight. We are grateful, Vanala,â Starr grinned. He wasnât sure if it was the blankets he was under, or the thought of someone caring for him, but he laid down feeling warmer than he ever had before. He would be okay. This would take getting used to, but he would be okay.
I made a promise to you. I will uphold that no matter what comes our way.
I know you will.Â
Starr drifted off to sleep for the third time that day, and though the feeling was still foreign, the warmth from within was comforting enough to bring him peace.
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T3CHN0 DLC: CATALYST
CATALYST (noun). A person or thing that precipitates an event.
Featuring Ruadha and Ophelia from @skell-pilot-sora .
"Race you for it THREETWOONEGO!"Â
Ruadhaâs twin Gemels were out in seconds, the grappling daggers deploying and sinking into the ground far off. He got a flying headstart, smiling all the way. Should he have asked for directions back to the city before initiating a race? Nah, heâd find his way. He always did, and even if he didnât, the adventure was what truly mattered in the end! Even the victory that came with winning a race didnât matter as much to them, not in that moment.
What mattered was that Fudge was alive. Fudge Carson, their best friend, their buddy through thick and thin, was alive and well and breathing.Â
Ruadha remembered the pain. He remembered hearing the news about Carson Tech, a terrorist sneaking in and igniting a bomb that destroyed the entire building, caved it inwards like a house of cards. He remembered his Mamaj coming home, pale as a ghost, bandages covering up her more serious wounds and her arm in a cast. He remembered his mind on a constant loop, his energy faded and dull, upon hearing the news, seeing Fudgeâs grave a few days later.Â
Seeing Fudge alive wasâŠit was a miracle. A blessing, a wish Ruadha had sent to the stars, but never once did he think it would come true.Â
And that was why his smile was brighter than it had ever been, that was why Ruadha embraced the skies with more vigor than ever before. Their method of travel meant that there were constant points where theyâd end up launching themselves higher, higher into the sky, and in those moments they could see Fudge blasting underneath them, feet plastered onto the back of his rocket hammer. He gained a decent lead, knowing the way back far better than Ruadha did, but it didnât matter. He could see Fudgeâs determined smirk, hear his laughter on the wind. Alive, alive and happy and as it should be. Ruadha felt a small ache in his heart; heâd missed this, heâd missed this so much. He never wanted this to end.Â
The city walls appeared on the horizon, and Fudge looked upwards, keeping track of where Ruadha was. He said something about competing against a rocket hammer, his voice dull against the thrill of the moment, but he failed to notice how close he was to the gate. He smacked headfirst into the support beam, his rocket hammer flying further into the city. Ruadha promptly burst out laughing at the image. But in his laughing fit, he didnât pay attention to his angle of descent. He ended up gliding through the air, nearly crash-landing, but he managed to get his shield angled upwards so he could avoid smacking into Fudgeâs back.Â
âŠOf course, thatâs what he thought he did.
Was it the wind that angled him down again? No, there was something deeper, a new feeling that had crept up inside Ruadhaâs heart to replace the nostalgia. His head pounded as he made contact with the beam, the shield sticking itself deep within the wall as he toppled backwards, skidding across the steel flooring. Groaning, Ruadha picked themselves up, their smile wavering as they observed the damage. Worst case scenario, theyâd have to pay to repair the wall -
No. No, no no no no. No. NO.Â
The shield was embedded in the wall. Fudgeâs decapitated head was perched on top of it like a hunting prize while the rest of his lifeless body bled out on the floor, broken, irreparable.Â
Ruadha stood up on shaky legs, unable to pull his gaze away from the scene. He couldnât move past this spot, frozen, incapable of processing what heâd done. This couldnât be real, this didnât feel real. No, he wouldnât accept this.Â
When he finally found the will to move, Ruadha stepped forward, forward, bending down to grab his gemels. Why did he care about them? Fudge was dead. Dead again. By his hands, his stupid idiot hands, he was so dumb it hurt -
Why was he pointing a gemel at Fudgeâs head? Wait, hold on, no, he shouldnât have a finger on the trigger. He was dead, he was dead, what the fuck was he doing -
BANG.
The first shot rang out louder than Ruadha could process. It hit Fudgeâs head square between the eyes. Black blood dripped from the wound. Ruadha tried to force their hand down, tried to remove their finger from the trigger, but it remained in its spot despite their mental resistance. Lightning shot up his spine, something embedded there that he hadnât felt before, and when the lightning reached his mind he screamed, loud and clear and pained. The gemel fired again.
BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG -
âRuadha.â
Finally, free will returned to him, and Ruadha looked over his shoulder. That voiceâŠit was Mamaj. Ophelia. Her tone was colder than the blood beneath his skin, ice cold and stoic. It wasnât like anything heâd heard before.Â
âMamaj?...â He whispered, afraid of the answer, afraid of what he would say next.
But she didnât. She said nothing, nothing at all. She shook her head, turned her back to him, walking back into Primordia, into - no, no, that wasnât Primordia. Primordia was not a spiral into darkness, a tunnel into a void unknown. It swallowed Ophelia whole before he could scream for her to come back, come back and help him, and eventually the void touched his feet and removed every waking scene from his vision. Everything disappeared with the shadowâŠ
Save for Fudgeâs body, sprawled out on the ground, and Fudgeâs head, still perched on the shield above.Â
Ruadha fell to their knees. They cried and screamed and begged the world to return life to them, they couldnât stand it here, this void of loneliness with only their mistake to haunt them, they couldnât fucking breathe -
~
Ruadha woke with a start, nearly falling out of his chair. The force pushed it back from the desk heâd been sleeping on top of, and it spun until it hit a wall. He panted, trying to regain his surroundings, convince himself that it was all a dream. Yes, he knew where he was. This was Fudgeâs lab, the messy abode of creation. The freckled Outfitter wasnât far, sitting in front of the monitors in the center of the room, eyes wide and watching.Â
â...You good, Ru?â Fudge asked carefully, putting the screwdriver in his hand down. His face was smeared with motor oil - right, yes, they were trying to recalibrate the engine for Fudgeâs new Skell. Ruadha nodded, though he knew every part of him betrayed this answer. Fudge continued to stare, expression blank for a moment. He opened his mouth to say more, but Ruadha spoke first.
âBad dream. Very bad dream. This isnât still a dream, is it? Youâre here? Youâre alive? Youâre not dead and Iâm not still dreaming?â
It came out in a rush, a rush that was characteristic of him at this point. He gripped the sides of the rolling chair, waiting for Fudgeâs response. Finally, Fudge chuckled, grinning with a gentle warmth that most people werenât lucky enough to see.
âNot a dream. Iâm here. Iâm alive. Iâm not dead and youâre not still dreaming.â
âGood. Awesome. Perfect. Excellent.â Ruadha repeated synonyms, all for himself, all for consolation. He slid further down into his chair, breathing a sigh of relief. His eyes closed for a second, long enough that when he opened them again, Fudge had gotten up, was approaching him. He offered out a hand for Ruadha to take, and when he did, when he pulled himself up, their hands stayed like that for a second. The warmth was appreciated, and Ruadha ended up mirroring Fudgeâs smile. When their hands finally separated, Fudge beckoned with his head over to the monitors, to the piece of engine he was working on, still on the table in front of them.
âTalk to me about it while we build. The distraction might help.â Fudge offered, âUnless you still need a minute, I mean.â
âNope, we have so many minutes, I donât wanna spend them sitting down,â Ruadha chirped, his energy slowly crawling back to him, âWe build today. We build every day. Itâs better like this.â
The last sentence was a slip, a confession from the heart. Fudge paused before responding.Â
âIt is. It really is.â
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T3CHN0 DLC: EXTINGUISH
EXTINGUISH (verb). To put an end to; annihilate.
Fudge smelled the smoke before the image could fully form. The taste of fire made its way down his throat, captured inside his lungs, his body, his soul. Charred and unforgiving, he recoiled into himself, and finally he could see the smoke, the remnants of a catastrophe he wasnât present for. He stumbled forward, nearly tripping on the rubble beneath his feet, and he realized that a building had crumbled, the fire had pulled it down and erased it from existence. There was nothing left here but a shadow of the past, or so he wished to believe. That meant all he had to do was leave, and leave quickly.Â
He could hardly see the sky, he could hardly see any of the surrounding area. Fudge coughed into his elbow, the cool metal of his arm bringing some solace, some familiarity. His clothes were torn, the fire having clawed its way through the fabric and creating holes in its wake. He could fix it later. He could fix all of this later. Another step forward, another, another -
âWho are you?â
Fudge stopped. That voice was far too familiar for comfort. He couldnât bring himself to turn around, to face the source.Â
âIâm Fudge. Fudge Carson.â
âNo, youâre not. Iâm Fudge Carson.â
Fudge swallowed hard, his hands clenching into fists. âDad built me to be an exact copy of you. Iâm not the original, but I am Fudge Carson.â
âBut youâre a copy. You canât be Fudge Carson if youâre a copy.â
âWhat do you know? Canât you let Dad have this? He missed you, he missed you so much that he rebuilt you from the ground up and gave up his own life so you could have a second chance. You should be grateful Iâm even here.â Fudge felt himself grow tense, the words spitting out of his mouth like poison. Heâd fallen down this hole too many times to count, and he was done entertaining the thought that he wasnât good enough to be Fudge. Who cared if he was the original or not? What mattered was that he was alive, what mattered was that he was making the most of the life he was givenâŠ
âŠRight?
The floor shook as something close by exploded, another fire erupting. Fudge felt the heat on his back, and wincing, he covered his ears and folded in on himself. He almost expected the darkness to consume him the same way it had when he died on Earth, when Carson Tech collapsed around him, his home, his home -
âThose arenât your memories. Theyâre mine.â
âTheyâre ours,â Fudge hissed, âIâm you.â
âYouâre a fake. Youâre a copy. A machine programmed to act a certain way.â
âSo fucking what?! Why does it matter?!â
âDo you think Dad would ever love a machine the same way he loved me? Do you think he sees you as his son, or just a copy? He canât love us both the same way. Youâre just playing an act to make him happy.â
âI. Am. Fudge.â Fudge growled, âAct or not, thatâs who I believe I am. Itâs who I am.â
âWhat you believe? Or what you were programmed to believe? Stop lying to yourself. Youâre nothing but a program. Easily manipulated, easily coded to please. Youâre nothing. Nothing.â
âShut UP -â
Fudge whirled around, fire now leaking from his voice, fueled by rage. But it was immediately extinguished once he saw the person he was talking to, the other Fudge. It was another Fudge, that much he confirmed, and it was likely the Fudge that died in the Carson Tech explosion. Another blast rang out, almost to confirm Fudgeâs suspicions and silence anything he was about to say. His mouth hung open, unable to look away.
This Fudge was the one that died. Should be dead. A giant chunk of his head had been ripped out, revealing the flesh and blood beneath. His eye had been cleanly ripped out, and the blood trickled down what remained of his cheek, false tears. He was missing an arm, his left arm, and Fudge could even see the bone protruding out of the wound. Fudgeâs mechanical arm flexed, almost like he wanted to reassure himself that it existed, that this wasnât a mirror. The Fudge standing in front of him should be dead, and the very image made Fudge want to puke. He held back the bile, swallowing again and again and again. The mirror Fudge was unbothered, staring at him blankly, head tilted to the left like that side weighed too much now that the other half had been carved out.
âI died the day that Carson Tech was destroyed,â The dead Fudge said, monotonous, âYou were born of a broken father who defied the laws of life. Thatâs all you are, in the end: a crime against life and a plaything for a man who couldnât let go.â
Fudge didnât respond, not at first. How could he when he was still holding back his sickness? When he gained enough resolve, he muttered, âHow is that my fault? Why should I care? Itâs not like I asked to be revived.â
âYou say revived like you were ever alive to begin with. Machines arenât alive. Youâre a shell to house my memories - youâre a ghost.â
âI -â
âA failed ghost. You think Dad is proud of you? Youâre not his son. Youâre my ghost. How could he ever be proud of a ghost, a copy? Youâre nothing without my memory. You should stop parading it about like itâs yours.â
âIâm not a ghost,â Fudge choked on a sob this time, the beginnings of tears burning at the corners of his eyes, âIâm alive, Iâm Fudge, I -â
âIâm Fudge Carson. Youâre nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.â
Another explosion originated from behind Fudge, and the world went dark as he screamed.Â
~
Fudge bolted upright, sweat pooling down his head. He was panting as if heâd been running. He sat there, soaking in the nightmare, soaking in the message his subconscious had given him. Eyes blown wide, he tried to wipe his brow with the end of his shirt, taking a moment to breathe, to recuperate.
âGOOD MORNING, MASTER CARSON.â RIPS came online, echoing throughout his bedroom. âI DETECTED AN INCREASED HEART RATE AND RAPID VITALS. PLEASE SHARE YOUR STATUS.â
âIâm fine, RIPS. Had a nightmare, is all,â Fudge groaned, his head pounding. Somehow he could still taste the smoke on his tongue, a phantom of his dreams that came to haunt him. âI just need a minute.â
âCALLING MASTER CALDRAVIX.â
âWoah, hang on RIPS, I didnât say to -â
And just like that, RIPSâs voice receded into the dial tone of a comm device, and two seconds later, Pongo picked up. âGood morning Fudge! Are you okay? I think RIPS dialed my number.â
âYeah, that piece of shit,â Fudge cursed, sinking back into his pillow and staring at the ceiling, âShe saw I had a nightmare. Guess she called you thinking it was that bad.â
âWas it?â
âHm?â
âA bad nightmare. You know you can talk about it if you want.â
Fudge sighed. Pongo had a sixth sense when it came to people lying - or, no, that wasnât quite right. He could read peopleâs emotions, it was his superpower. Fudge knew he couldnât bullshit this one, not with how bad the nightmare really was.
âIt was definitely one of the worse ones Iâve had.â Fudge admitted. At least he felt safe knowing that Pongo wouldnât judge him, wouldnât taunt him for something he couldnât control. âBut itâs not something I think I can vocalize. Not right now, anyways.â
Pongo was silent for a moment. âOkay. I am going to go get coffee for myself. I am going to pick up some stuff for you too, and I will be over there soon. Do you want anything specific?â
âI trust your judgment,â Fudge chuckled, âIâll pay you back once you get here.â
âFudge. What did I tell you about that.â
âOh come on, I feel bad that you always do this.â
âFudge.â
âFine, holy shit, youâre stubborn. Iâll see you soon.â
Pongo giggled at that, knowing heâd won this conversation. âAlright. Take care of yourself. I love you.â
You love a ghost.Â
Fudge stiffened. With hesitation, he responded in kind. âLove you too, Pon.â
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T3CHN0 DLC: ALONE
ALONE (adjective). Having no one else present.
The sky, painted black. A cold wind enveloping his body, harsh snow flying into his face. Pongo instinctively wrapped his arms around his body, his teeth chattering. He wore nothing but his usual armor, two layers far from enough to deal with the unyielding cold. Snow crunched below his feet, but he could hardly see it in the night, he could hardly see past his own body.
Pongo nearly asked Mira if it could direct him towards a shelter, some semblance of escape from the relentless blizzard, but his words fell silent. It was hard to speak when the cold pressured his throat closed, dripped ice down into his lungs. All he could do was walk forward, keep walking, hope that he found something or someone that could help his circumstance -
His foot hit something. Pongo stopped shuffling forward, looking down at the obstruction. It was so hard to tell, so incredibly hard to see, but when he touched it with the tip of his shoe again, it moved ever so slightly. A rock? Pongo had to know. He bent down, curling in on himself as his breaths came out in condensed puffs. With a great deal of resolve, he unwrapped one of his hands from his self embrace and reached down to touch the rock. And the moment he did, he felt something new. It was a jagged rock, exceedingly cold to the touch. But the curves felt more likeâŠ
Pongo yelped, falling back onto his rear. That was a nose. That was a face.Â
The darkness existed to torment him in that moment, for it receded enough for Pongo to discern more of the faceâs features. Freckles over honeyed skin, cracked goggles a few inches away. Wires protruding out of a gaping wound, carving out one of its eyes while the other was wide open in immortal fear. And its body, its body lay segmented and broken, separated from its head not too far.Â
Pongo started to hyperventilate, pushing himself onto his knees to crawl back towards the body, some morbid sense of duty filling his heart to make sure there was nothing he could do. But the closer he got, the more the darkness faded, and further in the distance, more bodies appeared, more familiar faces. Some belonged to the party that had joined him in New Strasbourg, some were old friends he hadnât seen in years. All of them were dear to his heart, and in that moment, they all broke his heart. He found himself crying, but the tears froze on his cheeks, in the corners of his eyes, ordering him to keep his sorrow buried.Â
Then, the sound of something cracking, something ripping. Pain enveloped Pongoâs arms and legs - the beginnings of hypothermia? He looked down at his hands and discovered that the truth was far worse. From his fingertips, claws had formed, his skin hiding itself underneath blood-stained white fur. The metallic tang even found its way into his mouth, leaking from his juice like a wine heâd drank too quickly, dripping from sharpened canines. Pongo sobbed, a dry and pitiful thing, stumbling backwards and onto his feet. His gaze flickered back and forth between his hands and the bodies, and he finally saw that fresh blood was pouring out of those bodies, the same that stained his hands, and that realization sent him spiraling. He did this. This was his fault.
The ground rumbled below his feet, and a new cavernous darkness opened up, swallowing each of the bodies whole. Pongo bawled, running forward, trying to stop them from being sucked up. But he couldnât reach any of them, he was too far away even though heâd been kneeling next to one mere moments before. And eventually, the bodies had all vanished, and Pongo could only wait until the pit came for him next. But it never did, stopping inches from Pongoâs feet.Â
It wasnât like he deserved to join them, anyways.
His chest heaving, mouth open as he desperately struggled to breathe, Pongo let out one last broken scream as he charged forward, chasing the pitâs edge until he finally made it, finally toppled over the edge and let the darkness eat him alive -
~
Pongoâs scream followed him into the waking world as he bolted upright in his bed. Panting, he frantically looked around, realizing that he was in his barracks, he was safe. It was all a dream. A nightmare. Swallowing hard, he gazed down at his hands, shaking at his sides. Usually, heâd only see the left one shaking, a product of getting it replaced all those years ago. But this day, both hands shook with the same ferocity, and no matter how many times he tried to tell himself he was okay, his body didnât believe him.
It was warmer here. His tears flowed freely, and after accepting that he wasnât okay, that he wouldnât be for quite some time, Pongo brought his knees up to his chest and buried his face. He let himself cry, he let himself feel. He didnât know how long he stayed like that, confined to his own emotions, but when his comm device buzzed on his nightstand, he nearly jumped out of his own skin. It took him a second to finally reach for it, to read the message that had just been sent.
From: Abel
When are u free? Iâve got a surprise for u down at the test hangar <3
Pongo stared at the message. Abel had been one of the bodies.Â
ButâŠbut he didnât need to burden Abel with that knowledge.
Pongo typed out a response, his hands still shaking.
Let me get my morning coffee. I will meet you there. <3
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T3CHN0 File 8: ALIVE
ALIVE (adjective). (Of a person, animal, or plant) living, not dead.
Featuring the Crosses of @shadowoa , @apolleh , @skell-pilot-sora , @elysia-cross , @phoenixfireartists , and @stargazer-ele .
Upon opening her eyes, Ophelia couldnât determine where she was, if she was alive or not. The same darkness that had greeted her in T3CHN0 was pervasive even now, and though she felt a notable difference in her body, she could hardly see what those differences were. Small pinpricks of pain in the back of her neck were the only indication that she wasnât dead. Groaning from a collection of fatigue and soreness, Ophelia squinted when the darkness receded, a door in front of her sliding down and opening into the outside world. Right, yes, she was stored in a pod in order to access T3CHN0, and she was back in the real world now, back in Dsandroâs lab. She pushed herself out of the pod and stumbled forward, observing her surroundings. Looked like she was the first one out of her pod.
Slowly but surely, the other pods opened up, and the rest of the group emerged in similar disoriented states. Ciel immediately fell to her knees, and Polaris, in slightly better shape, knelt down to embrace her once more. Abel and Nyx exchanged looks with each other, scanning each other over for any wounds, and Touya held his head in his hands. Ophelia ended up walking towards him, a hand on her hip. An eye poking out between his fingers, Touya eventually removed his hands to properly address her.
âHow are you feeling?â He asked.
âFine ânough. Been through worse bâfore,â She admitted, âBut real quick, âfore we get things sortedâŠI wanted tâ personally thank you.â
âThank me? For what?â
âYe donât know Fudgemuffin at all, right? Yer a stranger tâ him?â
âIâŠwell, Iâve heard of him in passing, but Iâve never had the pleasure of meeting him before today.â
âThatâs ma point right there. Ye didnât have tâ risk yer neck fer âim, but ye did.â Ophelia said, genuine, âSo thanks fer tagginâ along. Means a lot tâ me, and I bet it meant a lot tâ him, too.â
âItâs not a big deal,â Touya replied, âI bet he would have done the same for -â
âYouâve returned!â
A familiar voice sounded off from the monitors against the wall, and Ophelia immediately spun around. But Abel and Nyx ran up to it first, both of their hands poised over the keyboards. One of the screens flickered, presenting the rose symbol associated with Colette.Â
âYouâre okay!â Abel cheered, relieved.
âIâm so sorry,â She apologized, âI tried to return to T3CHN0 to aid you, but Dr. Dsandro implemented a firewall that I couldnât break through. But, judging by your current status, you were all able to navigate and exit T3CHN0 without any issues.â
âThat was thanks to Fudgecake,â Nyx explained, âHe got all of us out of there in one piece. But he also fused his programming with T3CHN0 and destroyed Dsandroâs data while we were in there.â
âIâŠI see.â Colette hesitated, âLet me check something.â
A pause, whirring inside the monitors as she processed something. âYou would be correct. T3CHN0âs program now falls under a new userâs permissions, and Dr. Dsandroâs data is goneâŠâ
âDoes that mean the bastardâs dead?â Polaris asked.
âItâŠwell, yes, in shortened terms. His conscience has been deleted, and I am unable to recover it. Only the new user in control of T3CHN0 has the ability to restore the backup data, but I donât see that data either. Which meansâŠâ Colette trailed off, and in the silence, Ophelia grinned. Thank God the fucker was dead, permanently.Â
After a moment, Colette asked Abel and Nyx, âWould you mind doing me a favor? Can you locate the half-sphere on the desk and place it in front of the keyboards? And please make sure that itâs plugged in properly to a power source.â
âOn it,â Nyx said, spotting the device and placing it where Colette had asked. Their fingers ran along a plug that was already connected to the back, and they followed it down to a power outlet just behind the desk. Ophelia watched intently, knowing exactly what the device was and what it would do, and she took a step forward in anticipation.Â
âAlright, it looks good,â Nyx confirmed, âSoâŠwhat is it?â
The device ignited in green light, pouring out of small windows on the sides, and out of the half-sphereâs top, a holographic image was put on full display. Though most of the hologram was green, the figure it projected was not. A young girl now smiled brightly at the group, brown hair curling behind her shoulders. A rose symbol on her sleeve indicated her identity before she spoke.
âDr. Dsandro built this device for me so I could properly address him,â Colette explained, âBut as he became more enthralled in his work, he dismissed it as a useless waste of space. I havenât been able to project my appearance for quite some time, so knowing that he is no longer with usâŠI thought I could use this as my first act of rebellion.â
âGood for you!â Polaris mimicked Coletteâs smile, helping Ciel up and keeping a hand on her opposite shoulder. Cielâs cheeks were damp, a sign that sheâd been crying, but Ophelia decided against mentioning it. After all, she felt the same way.Â
âNow then, I have a few more matters to discuss with each of you, especially now that I have no primary source I must report to,â Colette told everyone, âThe first being the fact that T3CHN0 is still operational. I see that your friend, Fudge, fused with the program. This isâŠwell, Iâm afraid this action is irreversible.â
âHe gave us an explanation while we were inside T3CHN0,â Ciel recalled, âHis current mimeosome wouldnât be able to house such a complex program. He asked us to build him a new body.â
âThat would be the best course of action, yes,â She agreed, âBut thatâs not all. While I was investigating the nature of this fusion, I discovered a separate file that originated within T3CHN0 - or more specifically, a file that originated after the fusion took place. I believe that Fudge, using this fusion to his advantage, sent this to me to give to each of you.â
âA new file?â Abel pressed, âWhatâs in it?â
âWould you like me to open it?â
âHell fuckinâ yeah,â Ophelia made her way next to Abel, âOpen âer up. Maybe itâs somethinâ important fer buildinâ his new body.â
âOf course. One moment, please.â
The whirring noise returned, louder this time. Ophelia scowled, wondering what kind of file would take this long and this much strength to process. But then, Coletteâs eyes widened, and she gave them a vital piece of information.
âThe file isâŠan artificial intelligence. It has a similar line of coding to mine. When I open the file, would you like me to project their appearance onto the hologram?â
A brief pause as everyone looked at each other, thoroughly confused. Ophelia cleared her throat. âSure thing. Can ya tell who it is?â
âI canât, unfortunately. The file name has no identifying clues or names attached.â
âRight. Make sure it wonât hurt ya at all, then feel free tâ project them if itâs safe. We ainât havinâ a repeat oâ Fudgemuffin on my watch,â She responded.
âOkay. Opening the file nowâŠâ
Coletteâs image shrank back into the projection device, and the soft green light fizzled as a new projection was set up. The figureâs image was too distorted to make out at first, and though they tried to speak, their voice was broken and disjointed. Ophelia squinted, trying to figure out if this was Fudge or some other artificial intelligence heâd saved, but then again, who could it possibly be? If it was Dsandro, thenâŠno. No, it wouldnât be. Fudge was smart, he wouldnât do that.
The voice echoed out a few words that she could hear, and she concluded it wasnât Fudge. But it sounded familiar, hauntingly familiar.
â...Hello?...Hello hello?â
Abel chuckled to himself. âHello, Phone Guy.â
âDid you really just make a Five Nights At Freddyâs joke?â Nyx hissed.
âI did, and Iâll do it again,â Abel smirked. Ophelia wasnât impressed. Not in the slightest.
âColette, whatâs goinâ on?â She asked, slightly annoyed at the ordeal.
âIâm working on stabilizing the connection!â She answered, âPlease hold on!â
And slowly, the figure started to look clearer, and their attempts at communication were far more successful. Before Ophelia could see them fully, they asked a question that made her heart stop and her blood go cold.
â...Phel? That you over there?â
There was no way. No way in fucking hell.Â
She pushed in front of Abel, staring up at the hologram as her hands wrapped around the edge of the desk, her knuckles scraping against the wood. And sure enough, her suspicions were correct, and the figure finally cleared to a point where she could recognize them. A white lab coat over a black buttoned shirt, messy brown hair pulled back into a loose bun, brown eyes gentle and warm.
âAntonio. Motherfucking. Carson.â Ophelia breathed, âArenât you a sight fer sore eyes.â
âCould say the same about you!â Antonio smiled, then looked upon the rest of the group. âOh my goodness, what a collection!...Wait, do you have wings on your head? What an odd modificationâŠâ
âWould I be correct in assuming that youâre Fudgeâs father?â Ciel asked upon being singled out, her tone signaling that she was just as shocked as Ophelia was.Â
âThatâs me! Antonio Carson, pleasure to meet you.â He introduced himself, âNow, ah, Phel, I umâŠI think Iâve got some explaining to do.â
âYe think?!â Ophelia growled, somewhere in between fury and relief, relief that one of her best friends was speaking to her, alive and well as if nothing had ever happened, âFirst of all, whyâd ya never tell me âbout rebuildinâ Fudgemuffin?! Ye know I woulda helped ya with that in a heartbeat!! Faster than a calculator, even!! Anâ donâ even git me started on what thâ ever lovinâ hellâs happeninâ with ya right now, howâre ye -â
âWoah!!â Antonio chuckled nervously, holding his hands up in defense, âOkay, I get it, I fucked up. I can explain that first part a little easier, though. I kept it a secret from basically everybody, becauseâŠwell, there were more than a few people at the time that wouldâve stopped me. And there were more than a few people who wouldâve asked me to do the same thing for them, and with the little time I hadâŠI couldnât risk it. I wasnât going to let anything get in between me and rebuilding Fudge.â
âYe know I woulda helpedâŠâ Ophelia shook her head, dejected.
âI know you wouldâve. In hindsight, I shouldâve enlisted you. ButâŠbut I couldnât risk anything. I just couldnât.â
âOkay, that aside, Six-Shooter had another good point,â Nyx interjected, âHow exactly are you here? I mean, I donât know your son all that well, but I know his dadâs dead.â
âDo I look dead to you?â Antonio joked, âBut yeah, technically Iâm dead. But while you were all in T3CHN0, Fudge was trying to figure out how to fix this whole mess, and he figured something out. I created his conscience back on Earth based on all the memories I had of him, and I tried to remain as accurate to the living example as I could. I did a damn good job, if I say so myself, but thatâs beside the point. So, pulling from his own program that I coded, he recreated me. Good olâ fashioned inception at its finest.â
âAnd why didnât he tell us when we were all back in T3CHN0?â Polaris questioned, âSure wouldâve loved to know weâd be coming back to his dad needing a body. You do need a body, right?â
âI do,â He nodded, âAnd if I had to guess, it was either because of time constraints, or he didnât know if this would work. After all, he was suffering from T3CHN0âs corruption just as much as you all were.â
âHe was?â Ciel breathed, âWas that why we saw him in a different form, I wonderâŠâ
âSo yer programâs separate from T3CHN0 anâ Fudge, which means gettinâ ye yer own body ainât gonna be hard,â Ophelia beamed at the realization, âGods above, Toni, yer a real lucky man.â
âIâll count my blessings once I can hug Fudge again,â He said, âAfter all, he needs a new body too, and weâll need some way to transport both of our programs out of this facility. That is, unless this lab has a way to fabricate mimeosomes?...â
âThis laboratory is unequipped to handle mimeosome fabrication, unfortunately,â Coletteâs voice echoed from the same half-sphere, âHowever, I have two transport vessels for you and Fudge to -â
âMake it three.â
â...Three? Iâm afraid I donât follow.â
âKeep it empty, but have a third drive ready. I have a plan.â
âYou anâ yer cryptic lilâ ideas, Toni,â Ophelia rolled her eyes. âBetter not involve settinâ anythinâ on fire.â
âNo torching anything until I get my body back,â Antonio crossed his heart to seal the promise, âNow then, Phel. See you on the other side.â
âGit outta âere, ye big fool,â She waved him off playfully, and with a fizzle, his image receded back into the half-sphere. Coletteâs soon reappeared, and she pointed to a series of colored harddrives nestled within the side of the largest monitor. A red one, a blue one, a green one, and a yellow one. Ophelia almost mistook them for wires based on the color scheme alone.
âFudgeâs program is in the red harddrive,â Colette explained, âAnd Antonio Carsonâs is located within the blue one. The yellow one is the empty one he requested.â
âWhat about the green one?â Touya piped up, having been silent and observing, âAndâŠwhat about you?â
âThe green harddrive is for me. Iâll be placing my program into it for safekeeping,â She said, âItâs not like Iâll be able to do much here now that Dr. Dsandro is gone, so I trust you to do with me what you will. Whether itâs granting me a new purpose or destroying me, I have no preference. AlthoughâŠif Iâm allowed to be selfish, I would also love my own body. But please place priority in Fudge and Antonioâs recovery!â
âYe got it, Colette,â Ophelia replied, âThank ye fer all yer help.â
âYes, youâve been a joy!â Ciel chirped, âWe wouldnât have been able to find Fudge without you.â
âIâm happy I could be of assistance,â Colette said, and with another fizzle, she was gone. Ophelia waited until a small ping was heard from the monitor before removing all four harddrives, stashing them in her pocket. The empty harddrive was still a mystery, but she supposed it was more incentive to get back to NLA. As she turned around, she opened her mouth, ready to address everyone, but Abel spoke first.
âWhereâs Pongo?â
The name made her raise an eyebrow. Curious, theyâd all completely forgotten about Pongo until that moment. But Abel was staring straight at the doors theyâd entered through. Theyâd been wooden, unlike some of the other doors theyâd entered through in the lab section of the building, and that same wood splintered out in all directions. Whatever had been on the other side had done a great job destroying them, and aside from the damage, there was no sign of Pongo anywhere.
Abel ran towards the doors in a panic, and Touya was close behind, his rifle already drawn. Ciel, Polaris, Nyx and Ophelia followed at a slower pace, with Nyx and Polaris being the only other two to draw their weapons. As Ophelia stepped over the wood and ducked beneath the shattered doorframe, she peered out over the hallways that stretched out before them. The alarm was still sounding and the lights were still dim, but even in the darkness, Ophelia spotted the same trail that Abel did. A splattering of blue across the walls, prominent and eerie. Glass from the windowed walls scattered across the floor, crunching under their boots. This was no longer a haunted house, whispering ghosts and secrets amongst the chilling atmosphere. This was a warzone, invoked by a dead man, perpetuated by innocent bystanders.Â
Abel called out for Pongo several times, darting down the hallways and peering into the lab rooms, hoping to spot him. Ophelia saw him stop in front of the room theyâd found Colette in and charge through the door - or, the lack of a door, completely smashed and opened up. Touya, close behind, prepped his rifle and loaded ammunition into it. When Ophelia could finally poke her head inside, she found Abel kneeling down next to Pongo, propped up by a cabinet, blood pooling from various wounds decorated all over his body. A few feet away, two other bodies were lying on the ground, the same two kids from before. Axel and Frost, if Ophelia remembered correctly. She nearly said something to Touya when he didnât immediately go to help them, but when she got closer, she saw the steady rise and fall of their chests, while PongoâŠwas he breathing? It was hard to tell. His head was drooped, hiding his gaze from the others, and his hands were limp at his side.
âShit, shit!!â Abel lifted Pongoâs head with his hands, delicately pressing his thumbs into Pongoâs cheeks. At this, Pongoâs eyes fluttered open, and he smiled softly. Touya pushed forward, checking over his wounds and observing how bad the damage was.
âA majority of these are artificial wounds,â Touya told Abel, âBut thereâs enough that heâll need to seek proper medical attention once weâre out of here. For now, if you can stand back, Abel, Iâll heal what I can.â
Abel did as he was told, though he hesitated in letting Pongoâs head go. However, his head stayed up, and he nodded at Touya, an indication that he heard, that he understood. Touya propped up his rifle, aimed it slightly above Pongo, and the resulting shot burst above him and sprinkled little bits of blue ether over his body. Ophelia saw some of the wounds heal below torn armor, but the blood, the idea of the wounds still remained. Pongo coughed, clutching his stomach in a weak declaration of pain.
âThank you,â He said to Touya, âHowâŠhow are all of you? Is Fudge okay? Did you find him?â
âWe did,â Nyx explained, their drones folding and putting themselves away, âBut he needs a new body. He fused with T3CHN0, and itâs too much for his normal body to handle.â
âWe also recovered his dad!â Polaris added on, âFudge kinda replicated him somehow - inception shit, thatâs what he called it. And Coletteâs on one of those drives too, so we might get her a body too.â
âHisâŠhis father?â Pongo asked, confused, âBut his father passed away. He was left behind on Earth when it -â He coughed again, interrupting himself. â- okay, nevermind. I am just happy things worked out and that you are all okay.â
âAnâ what âbout those two?â Ophelia gestured to Axel and Frost, âThey alright?â
âThey justâŠfainted a couple minutes ago. I assumed you all did something to disconnect them from Dsandro and his control. They are alright, save for some little wounds from where they destroyed the lab trying to reach me.â
âAlright,â Abel nodded, âLetâs get you and them out of here. Thereâs a lot to go through, and like Touya said, you need medical attention. Are you able to stand?â
âI think so.â Pongo attempted to stand, his legs shaking under his weight. Abel ended up putting an arm under Pongoâs armpits to hold him up and support him. âAlright. Let us depart this wicked place.â
Ophelia couldnât agree with the sentiment more. With all four harddrives, the two unconscious J-Bodies, and an injured Pongo, the team headed out into the daylight. For once, Ophelia couldnât be happier to be out of a lab. She never looked behind her, not even once. How could she, when the future demanded so much of them now? How could she, when she knew that the future held so much potential? All she could do was be thankful, and all she did was embrace it with open arms.
~
Two weeks after leaving Dsandroâs lab, the premises were taped off under the guise of a pending investigation. Secretary Anna was horrified when she questioned the group, but was ultimately thankful to each and every one of them. After all, Dsandro was going to threaten the livelihoods of the entire cityâs population if he hadnât been stopped. She promised to stay in contact with everyone regarding appropriate compensation and sent everyone back to NLA, giving a final request to not speak of New Strasbourg openly. A secret city, despite its scandals, needed to remain a secret. There were no objections.
In her lab, behind a glass viewing wall, Ophelia watched her assistants monitor a mimeosome maintenance pod, conversing amongst themselves as they jotted down notes on their pads. The two most engaged were Byron and Marya - wait, no, those werenât their names anymore. Sacae and Renais were, respectively. That was taking some getting used to, if she had to be honest. Shaking her head, she returned her attention to the control panel in front of her, displaying status signals and updates on the person within the pod. Her brow furrowed as she pressed a few switches, hearing the panel purr with increased usage. It wouldnât be too long now.Â
A door behind her slid open, and disjointed footsteps shuffled towards her. Something metal clacked against the floor every so often, and Ophelia leaned back in her seat to look up at her new guest.
âWonât be long now,â She told Antonio as he stood himself next to the window, looking at the pod - looking inside the pod at his son.
âYouâre a miracle worker, you know that?â Antonio smiled, leaning on his cane for support. Funnily enough, Nyx and Abel had insisted on building it for him, though it was done with Opheliaâs supervision. It had to be perfect for him, after all. âI canât believe how fast you were able to get this done.â
âItâs my job, remember?â She chuckled, returning her focus to the control panel. She put a finger to the microphone installed on her earpiece and radioed the twins, asking, âHow we lookinâ in there?â
âAll systems stable,â Renais responded, âReady to go when you are, Professor.â
âOphelia,â She corrected, âCâmon now, Marya, summer internship was - what? Years nâ years ago.â
âSorry, Pro - Ophelia!â She apologized, and Ophelia rolled her eyes again and looked at Antonio.Â
âRight then, Toni. You want the honors?â
Antonio smiled softly, excitement pooling in his eyes like liquid fire. It still didnât feel real, seeing him standing there, as if nothing had ever happened. âIâd love to.â
Ophelia gestured to the button, blue and bright and enticing, the one that would set this new body in motion. Antonio swallowed hard, pressing down on it with little hesitation. The two watched as the panel lit up with new signals, vital signs and statistics, and the assistants all stepped back as the pod opened up. Steam pooled out of it, obscuring the figure inside for a moment, but then he stepped out and rolled his shoulders, testing the waters with his new body. Freckles danced across his skin and darted underneath his rolled up sleeves, trailed up his neck and performed on his cheeks underneath copper eyes. He saw the twins first, scoffing lightly.
âGod damn. I still canât tell you two apart.â
âWeâll get name tags next time,â Sacae joked, raising his clipboard, âHow are you feeling? Anything off?â
âGod, I feel amazing,â Fudge happily reported, âIâm gonna end up chopping this arm off again, though -â He held up his left arm, once a mechanical augment now covered in normal skin, completely humanized. â- but thatâs not your fault. I just like having a gun in my arm.â
âR-Right, okay,â That caught Sacae off guard, and Renais chuckled nervously. Ophelia decided itâd been long enough. She wouldnât let Fudge get away with his blatant ignorance!! So she stood herself up and got closer to the window, staying close to the panel to monitor any changes. She smirked, folding her arms over her chest.
âNot even gonna say howdy?â She said, and she was loud enough to pierce through the glass, draw Fudgeâs attention up towards her. He beamed, and gods, it was almost like he was five again, so full of life and light and an excitement for the world. Not many people saw this joy, not many people could see this part of him past the roughened exterior. It made her heart swell.
And then, Fudge looked at Antonio, and his entire expression shifted from wonder to complete and utter shock. Antonio chuckled, bracing himself.
âIt was nice knowing you, Phel.â
âHeâs not gonna kill ya,â She swore.
âNope. But he is about to yell.â
âWhyâs that?â
âWellâŠhe didnât really know that he was able to separate me successfully. This is probably a shock to him.â
âHe didnât know?!â
And just like that, any semblance of peace was shattered as Fudgeâs shout echoed all throughout the lab:
âWHAT THE FUCK?!!??!?!?!?!??!?!â
Ophelia sighed. At least she was prepared for that. What she wasnât prepared for was Antonioâs next question, asked quickly once Fudge found an exit and started bolting towards their room. She knew sheâd say yes even before he asked it. Perhaps she knew, all along.
âPhel? You think you can revive Maria next?â
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T3CHN0 File 7: CONFRONTATION
CONFRONTATION (noun). A hostile or argumentative meeting or situation between opposing parties.
Featuring the Crosses of @shadowoa , @apolleh , @skell-pilot-sora , @elysia-cross , @phoenixfireartists , and @stargazer-ele .
Dsandro was going to die. Heâd die by Opheliaâs hands, one way or another, and it wouldnât be pretty.
That was what she decided, shortly after her husband - an eight legged monstrosity, fangs dripping poison from a mouth too small, several more blackened eyes forming along his cheeks - lunged at her, so keen on her death that it made Ophelia tear up. The stench of death was rampant between Spyridon and Ruadha, still folded in on himself as he coughed up spider after fucking spider. Opheliaâs multigun was drawn, but she didnât have the heart to shoot, she didnât have the heart to hurt her family. Every attempt at convincing herself they were just illusions was interrupted by Spyridonâs relentless attacks, his pleas for her to end this suffering of his, of theirs. But heâd even admitted it before. There was no way she could fix this. Godhood had failed her, godhood was a farce.Â
And by god, did that make her angry.
Spyridon opened his mouth, hissing before he tried to speak again, but just as he raised a leg, just as he was about to strike once more, his body erupted into red and blue particles, dissolving into the digital air. Ruadhaâs body met the same fate, and Ophelia gaped as a small cube entered her vision, glitching out and slightly transparent, but still very much there. She growled, pointing her gun at it. Another fucking illusion, it had to be. What was it going to give her this time?!
But then, the cube spoke.Â
âOh shit, Auntie Phel!!â
âFudgemuffin?â Ophelia whispered, unable to process the fact that Fudgeâs voice just came out of that cube. âThat canât be -â
âI know, Iâm Minecraft now, I can explain everything once we get everyone back together,â He quickly interrupted, âI just disrupted everyoneâs illusions, I just have to - fuck, this is really ridiculous, I have no fucking autonomy here and itâs getting on my god damn nerves - there we go.â
Five other figures started to appear around Fudge, digitizing into place. After a few painstakingly long seconds, Ophelia realized it was the entire group, reunited. Judging from how pale everyone looked, theyâd gone through the same shit. Ophelia sighed. At least everyone was alive, and they had some semblance of Fudge with them.
âWhat the fuckâŠâ Polaris breathed, âAlright, I rate that a solid zero out of ten. That was beyond fucked. Dsandroâs gonna get his ass removed and Iâm gonna tear his limbs off to feed to the acapria.â
âUnderstatement of the year, North Star,â Nyx shuddered, âDsandroâs gonna pay for that one.â
âIâm sorry, everyone,â The cube floated downwards, almost like Fudgeâs shoulders had slumped, âI wouldâve come to help sooner, butâŠwell, I canât do much like this.â
âWait, Fudge? Is that you?â Abel asked, frowning. âBut your body -â
âMy bodyâs hanging out with Dsandro, yeah, but my conscience is stuck inside this fucking thing,â Fudge explained, âLong story short, Iâm gonna need your help reuniting me with my body again. Iâve got a plan to dismantle Dsandroâs little world and give him a much needed dose of reality.â
âWeâre going to need to distract Dsandro while one of us gets close enough to Fudgeâs body to reconnect him,â Touya added on.
âExactly. If I tried to fly in alone, Iâd get bitch slapped, and I donât know how much more damage this cube form can reasonably take before Iâm lost in the sauce. Iâd love to remain out of the sauce, if at all possible.â
Ophelia shook her head, bemused at Fudgeâs attempt at humor. It was a coping mechanism, she knew from experience, and while Polaris managed to snicker at it, everyone else didnât really react. Even Ciel, who had previously been confused to all hell and back, simply stared onwards, her mind somewhere distant, somewhere that wasnât in the present day. Ophelia wanted to comment on it, tell her to focus, especially since this was an important development, but the cube floated into her direct line of sight, Fudgeâs voice now softer, more earnest.
âAuntie Phel, I trust you the most. Can you get me back to my body in one piece?â
There was no hesitation. ââCourse I can, Fudge. Ye can count on me.â
âRight, then,â The cube spun around to face everyone, though its faces were all too similar to really say there was a front or a back, âEveryone else, I trust you to kick Dsandroâs ass. Thereâs just one extra thing I should tell you guys before you go diving right into battle, itâs about your cor -â
T3CHN0âs white noise started to buzz, the song shifting to an incessant swarm of bees. Ophelia spun around as the walls slid down into the ground, revealing Dsandro and Fudgeâs body in the same exact spot as before. And yes, Ophelia could tell it was the same spot, and even if it wasnât, she didnât care. They were in sight, they were in mind, and she knew what was going to happen next.
âWell now,â Dsandro tsked, âCheating isn't very honorable now, is it?â
âWe never agreed to your game,â Abel growled in response, âAnd youâve got our friend. All bets are off.â
âWho, this empty shell?â He asked, and he did not smile, he did not smirk. In fact, his question was one of genuine curiosity, one that was founded on an answer he already held. He stepped closer to Fudge, placing his hand on his shoulder, and the body did not respond. âAlthoughâŠno, not empty, far from empty.â
âThe hellâs that supposed to mean?!â The cube flew out from behind Ophelia, Fudgeâs characteristic rage igniting tenfold, âWhy, you dickbag?! Why did you hunt me down to be your fucking puppet?!â
Dsandro seemed off put for a moment, clearly surprised at this little floating cube who was freely cursing him out. âWell, itâs simple, really. Itâs all possible because Antonio Carson wanted you to live. He created a program that acted identical to his son, and in doing so, he made that program fluid, mobile. His coding practically made you indestructible. I wanted that part of your coding for T3CHN0 - imagine, an indestructible world where humanity could live in harmony, free from the terrors of the cosmos!â
âReal damn ironic oâ ya tâ say that,â Ophelia countered, raising her multigun, âIf yer worldâs really free from all thâ dangers out there, then how come itâs founded on imprisoninâ an innocent man?â
âDamn right about that,â Polaris came up on Opheliaâs left hand side, fists raised and ready to enter combat at a momentâs notice. âFreedom and godhood donât mean shit when it means someoneâs gotta suffer for it.â
âThatâs where youâre both wrong,â Dsandro countered, âFudge - the program that once inhabited this body standing next to me - is just a program. Itâs not human, itâs not considered a life in the way that we all are. How can you defend something thatâs -â
âFinish that fuckinâ sentence. I dare ya.â Ophelia spat, and everyone was beside her now, weapons all poised and ready, the fire in their eyes raring for a fight, for justice. Enough had been said.
And yet, Dsandro opened his weasely little mouth one last time with a smile, raising his hand off of Fudgeâs shoulder.
âConflict is inevitable, but another test of worth,â He said, âSo then, letâs make haste. May the best world win.â
And with a snap of his fingers, everything began.
Dynamo drone fire and ether swelled and shot straight towards Dsandro, who glitched out of existence and reappeared in the same spot, completely unfazed. Polaris charged forward, screaming bloody murder with full intent to make due on it, and Ciel followed on the pole of her bolide, her psycho launchers formed and trailing behind as they continued to fire. Ophelia went after Ciel, Fudgeâs cube staying close behind her, and she left Abel and Touya behind as they engaged in more ranged attacks. She focused on everyoneâs positions for too long a second, and when she looked back at Dsandro, she realized with a sinking heart that Fudgeâs body was nowhere to be seen.
It didnât take long for him to reappear, however. Mere yards away, Fudgeâs body engaged the beam rifle in his mechanical arm and charged up a quick blast. Ophelia skidded and dodged with little grace, running a full circle around Fudgeâs body. She fired off a couple blasts from her multigun, trying to shoot around but not at him. The blast particles gave a decent amount of cover, but it hardly seemed to impact Fudgeâs body, the relentless volley following close behind her.Â
âAuntie Phel, this is a really awful fucking time to mention it, but youâve gotta know something important,â Fudgeâs cube fluttered, dodging a blast and finding itself mere inches from Opheliaâs head, âWhen Dsandro put you inside those fear simulations, he mustâve used them to corrupt your programs within T3CHN0, so you need to be caref -â
Ophelia had been listening a little too closely, letting up on her sprint for the briefest of moments, and that was all Fudgeâs body needed to land a perfect shot to her torso. She cried out, getting launched back a fair distance and losing her footing. As her back hit the ground, Fudgeâs cube flew after her, and she sat up to assess the damage. The shot had left a collection of blackened particles on her chest, glitching and slowly crawling outwards. Her entire image flickered and she gasped.
âThâ Sam Hell is this?!â She asked Fudge, trying to hide her rising panic.
âThatâs the good olâ corruption I tried to warn you guys about!â Fudge explained, âIf you reach one hundred percent corruptionâŠfuck, I donât even know whatâll happen, but I donât want you or anyone else to find out.â
âIt means youâll fall to the whims of the world, under my direct control.â
Somehow, Dsandro had made his way towards her, and Fudgeâs body had turned tail and went to attack the others. The sound of gunfire radiated against the worldâs soft symphony, and the combination made Ophelia want to puke. Dsandro, unfazed, unbothered, merely smirked down at her.
âI didnât expect to meet under these circumstances,â He confessed with a lazy shrug, âBut here we both are.â
âRight, right,â Ophelia hissed, clutching her stomach as she forced herself back on her feet, stumbling slightly, âReal nice tâ meet ya. Itâll be real nice tâ kill ya in a few seconds, too.â
âWell, hold on now,â He raised his hands in a mock sign of peace, âBefore you do, Iâd like to thank you for making all of this possible. T3CHN0 wouldnât have come into existence had it not been for you.â
ââScuse me?â She was rightfully confused, and judging by the little whirring noise Fudgeâs cube made, he wasnât in the loop either.
Dsandro chuckled, a low and proud thing that made Ophelia take a threatening step forward. He didnât move, still unfazed, still unbothered. âLet me take you back to the 2050 TechFes that Carson Tech hosted in the main headquarters. July 17th. The same day the flesh and blood prodigy of Antonio Carson was unfortunately killed in a terrorist attack that destroyed the building and stole the lives of many other inventors and scientists. Did you ever stop to think who those terrorists were? Who sent them? Who decided to target that specific building on that specific day?â
âYou didnât.â Fudge growled, catching on quickly.
âOh, Iâm not the one behind the destruction of Carson Tech. I simply hired the ones who were. Although I must admit, it was never in the cards to kill you. The attack was a distraction, a way to send a message to Antonio Carson that I wouldnât be so easily deterred.â
âSo ye wanted tâ kill Toni?!â Ophelia cried, âYe nasty son of a -â
âNo, I never wanted to kill Antonio,â Dsandro shook his head, âI created a distraction. Take away his lifeâs work and his only son, and use his son to prove that my invention would work. Heâd have no choice but to turn to me.â
âAnâ howâd I make that work for ye?â She hissed, âWhatâs ma golden role in all this?â
âI was going to have myâŠrecruitsâŠuncover Fudgeâs body. Alive or dead, I would have used him to transfer his conscience over to the prototype T3CHN0 and show Antonio that my invention could work. You got to his body before they did, and it completely spoiled my plans at the time. HoweverâŠAntonio decided to recreate Fudge. A program in his likeliness, one that would replace him on the White Whale. Tell me, Ophelia, do you know what makes Fudgeâs program so special?â Before she could answer, he continued, âHis program is one of the most fluid Iâve ever seen. Nothing short of Antonioâs handiwork; he truly wanted this second Fudge to live. Nothing can corrupt it, nothing can break it beyond repair. I wanted that fluidity for T3CHN0, and so I had to retrieve Fudgeâs program and integrate it completely into T3CHN0. Now, this world is indestructible. It is an immortal haven that I doubt would have been made possible, had you not ruined my plans back on Earth. For that, I thank you.â
And with his explanation complete, Dsandro gave Ophelia a small bow, a hand over his heart in sincerity. A memory played in her head, repeating, repeating.
A ray of sunlight illuminating something under the wreckage. A familiar dark brown haircut. A familiar eye, cold and devoid of life. Part of his head, completely absent. Her screams, her cries. There was nothing she could do.
In the next second, Ophelia raised her multigun, pointed it straight where his heart was, hoping that a single blast would be enough to rip it in two.
âIâll fucking kill ya.â She swore.
He chuckled at that. âI look forward to seeing you try.â
She fired a shot at him, intending to hit him square in the chest, but he disappeared in the same instant. All he left behind were the remnants of his laughter, teasing her. No, no, she made a promise back then that sheâd slice the fucker that killed Fudge, that destroyed Carson Tech. He wasnât about to get away so easily. She spun, wild fury in her glare, searching the endless battlefield for the son of a bitch that did this, that caused so much pain and was able to talk about it with a smirk on his face, she was going to deck him so hard that the glass in his spectacles would embed in his eyes and cheeks and bury themselves so deep in the skin that -
âAuntie Phel.â
Fudgeâs voice, softer than it had ever been. Desperate, pleading. âI know. Weâre going to kill him. But to do thatâŠâ
âYou come first,â Ophelia grit her teeth, resolve flooding her mind and absolving some, but not all, of the rage she harbored, âCâmon, Fudgemuffin, letâs get ye back tâ yer body. Then weâll both give âim a royal Texan sendoff straight down tâ hell.â
With a whizz, Fudgeâs cube drew closer to Ophelia, cowering slightly behind her right shoulder. Ophelia spotted Fudgeâs body in combat. Nyx had their drones converge into a singular spot above their head, and together, they shot off a large concentration of ether. Ophelia could only assume that the ether blast wasnât being purposefully aimed at Fudgeâs body, because it was fairly off course. It did cause him to swing to the side to dodge the edge of the blast, and he hardly had time to process another blast coming from below his feet. Blocks of ice surrounded his legs up to his upper thighs, and he looked over his shoulder with those blank blue eyes towards the culprit. It was Touya, who had exchanged his sniper rifle for a hand, extended, the glove he was wearing glowing a cold blue. Fudgeâs body, expressionless and dead, completely tilted towards Touya like he was a puppet whose strings had been cut, arms dangling at his sides as the ice shattered instantaneously. With lightning speed, his body rocketed towards Touya, who threw up his hands to defend himself and protect his face from whatever was to come. His stance was weak, eyes wide, knees shaking.
But then, something was thrown at Fudgeâs body, and the area around him went white with a blinding light. Abel, running towards Touya, had clearly thrown some sort of stun grenade that was making Fudgeâs body glitch and whir as he tried to comprehend his loss of sight. Abel had a hand on Touyaâs shoulder, asking him something Ophelia couldnât quite make out, and suddenly Fudgeâs body was back on the offensive. The stun hadnât lasted long at all, though his torso still exhibited the glitching particle effect as he fired off more shots at the two. Ophelia couldnât tell if they got out of the way in time due to the residual cover the blast provided, but from that digital smoke, three bursts of light blue ether emerged and hit Fudge square in the face, followed closely by three hooked wires that wrapped around him as he recovered from the second stun. Ciel and Polaris stepped out of the smoke, sharing a small high five just as the wires snapped and Fudge was free once more.
Ophelia watched closely, almost joining in the fray at several points when Fudge was stunned or restrained, but his recoveries were far too fast and she couldnât risk anything with Fudgeâs cube beside her. She thought she found an opening when Ciel blasted off three more ether shots that stunned Fudge, and Touya got more ice to form around his knees and lower legs, so she sprinted forward hoping to end this masquerade sooner than later. But as Fudgeâs body recuperated, still blinded, he pointed his beam rifle in the direction of the ether blasts and fired haphazardly. Ophelia looked away for too long a moment, and by the time she heard Polaris scream, she knew that one of those blasts had met a target. She almost thought it was Polaris, but when she finally stopped to brace herself, she saw that Ciel had taken the hits, every single one of them, all in various locations on her torso. She fell backwards into Polarisâs arms, her form flickering more intensely than anyone elseâs, and her expression kept switching from pain to rage to sadness to fear to - to empty nothingness.Â
In the cyclic song of the digital world, Ophelia heard Dsandroâs laughter. Cielâs mouth moved with his words. âLooks like someone wasnât worthy after all.â
Ciel bolted out of Polarisâs grasp, bolide in hand, and with the same dead stare as Fudgeâs body, she began swinging at Polaris. Ophelia was already sprinting at them both, switching out her six-shooter for one of her photon sabers, and she felt the sting of beam energy hit the backs of her ankles as she barely escaped a barrage from Fudgeâs rifle. She heard three cries, Touya and Abel and Nyx, who mustâve gotten caught up in Fudgeâs attacks. But she never turned, not once, intent on reaching Ciel. If Dsandro had assumed control of herâŠ
Ruadhaâs unnerving silence. The prayers Spyridon uttered as they passed by each grave. Antonioâs disbelief staring at a freshly dug grave. A Beloved Son. An Incredible Mind.
âGIT OUT Oâ HER BODY ANâ FACE US LIKE A MAN, YA SPINELESS SHIT-TARD!!â
Opheliaâs photon saber arced downwards, and Ciel flew backwards, head ticking to the left as her lips flashed between cold stoicism and a cruel smile. She didnât respond audibly, nor did Dsandro, but she instead sent a flurry of ether towards Ophelia, the same ones that Ciel had used to stun Fudgeâs body. Ophelia sliced through two of them, but the third took an unexpected path that smacked her right between the eyes, and her world went white. Stumbling back, she heard footsteps, Polaris shouting a warning, and something sharp slicing into her abdomen. When she regained vision, she realized that Ciel had sliced her with her bolide, and where blood wouldâve normally flowed from the wound, a deeper set of black particles trickled out, identical to the ones still forming over her chest.
âCiel, câmon angel, please snap out of it!!â Polaris screamed, âWe donât wanna hurt ya too!â
âOphelia, listen to me, right fucking now,â Fudgeâs cube floated in front of Ophelia as she took a knee, her free hand still clasped over her recent wound. His words leaked acid, a result of his own frustrations, but deep below she could place a hint of deep-laced concern, âI can fix this. Get me back to my body. The stuns seem to be working, so if I can just -â
âBut that son oâ a bitch needs ta fuckinâ pay in blood fer what he did tâ ya - fer all thâ shit he did tâ Toni,â Ophelia hissed, refusing to back down, âIâm gonna -â
âGo,â Polaris had ran over during his plea, bracing herself between Ciel and Ophelia as a human barricade. She swallowed hard, faltering for a moment before she held her fists up to guard her face, ready for the fight. âIâll keep Ciel busy. God knows I can distract her with my good looks.â
Ophelia looked between Polaris and Fudgeâs cube, wavering in her resolve. She wanted that killing blow, and if it meant going through CielâŠshit. Shit. She sighed, nodding towards Fudgeâs cube. In return, Fudgeâs cube spun around in acknowledgement before addressing Polaris.
âIâm absolutely treating you two bocadillos after this,â He promised, âStay safe, Polaris. Donât do anything too crazy.â
Polaris smiled, something soft and unlike her, at least based off the short time that Ophelia knew her. âNo promises, Hammertime. No promises.â
And with that, Ophelia gripped her photon saber and turned back towards Fudge, towards the other half of their ragtag group. Fudgeâs body was stumbling, hands trying to cover his face as Touya and Abel played a game of hot potato with their stuns. Where Touya would sound off Intercepts from his sniper rifle, Abel would toss a stun grenade, effectively making Fudgeâs body a headless chicken. Nyx kept their drones in a perfect circle around him, each firing off individual shots at his ankles in an attempt to knock him prone. Ophelia figured now was a better time than any to charge, and making brief eye contact with Touya, he raised one hand off of his rifle, and a collection of icy blue ether formed in his palm. The closer Ophelia got to Fudgeâs body, the more the ether grew, and just as he was about to fire it, Fudge straightened his spine so quickly it was unnatural. He lifted his mechanical hand and a singular blast propelled upwards from his beam rifle, and once it was high enough, it shattered and rained down individual bullets onto everyone. It was nearly impossible to dodge, and by the end of the storm, everyone had gotten hit at least once, even Ophelia. She saw the same black fragments forming at the impact points - sheâd gotten nailed in the left forearm and the right thigh - but they were also forming on the others. At least they didnât look as rough as Ophelia did.Â
âShit!â Fudgeâs cube cried, surveying the damage, âWe need to hurry, or the same thingâs gonna happen to you that happened to Ciel!!â
âAinât gonna let that happen,â She swore, âNo way, no how.â
âLonghorn!!â Nyx called out to her, their drones returning to their formation around them, âIâll lay down some cover fire for you! Abel, Hot Choc, keep stunning him!â
âOn it!â Both boys responded in unison, and with the plan laid out, Abel sent another stun grenade flying towards Fudgeâs body, landing at his feet and making him glitch out once more. Ophelia nearly questioned how he was getting so many stun grenades, but a realization dawned on her. They were in T3CHN0, a place where they could be and create anything. What the fuck were they doing, sticking to their normal weapons? She smirked, a lightbulb going off in her mind. Her photon saber evaporated, but the hilt remained, forming the base for a much longer, more blunt weapon. A gear in the middle of its base ticked as it fired up, a digital flame forming in its belly. Fudgeâs cube sparked, clearly excited.
âLetâs fucking go!!â He cheered as Ophelia brandished his beloved rocket hammer, a far lighter weapon than she originally gave him credit for, and let the base charge up before spinning around and flinging a ball of her six-shooterâs ammo straight at Fudgeâs body. It landed right at Fudgeâs feet, sending him up into the air, but he quickly righted himself and landed on his feet, now locked on and targeting her. It gave Nyx ample time to charge up their drones once more, and they began to float above the ground. Their drones didnât fire off a blast or a barrage like they had previously, but instead, they released a sea of ether into the surrounding area. Fudgeâs body looked around, having lost sight of the group even though they werenât far, and his eyes shot static electricity as he struggled to comprehend the situation he was in. More likely than not, that ether was doing something to him, and the distraction was more than enough for Abel to throw one last stun grenade to get him even more disoriented. The impact made him fall backwards, and ice extended out from the floor to catch him, forming prisons for his arms and legs before he was able to hit the ground. Ophelia raced forward as she saw the opening, his torso on full display. This was it, her chance to reunite Fudge with his body - she had to be quick about this, but she wasnât even sure where to begin.Â
But the moment she was close enough, the moment that she saw Fudgeâs body was cracking the ice and seconds away from escaping his binds, she knew she had to make a split second decision. Fudgeâs cube had followed close behind her, so with a spare hand, she plucked the cube out of the air and shoved it into Fudgeâs chest. The result was instantaneous. Ophelia was blown backwards, though she managed to use the rocket hammerâs fuel to give her a softer landing. The world went bright once more, but it didnât remain blinding for long. Squinting, Ophelia watched as the cube spun wildly over Fudgeâs chest, growing closer, closer, as he screamed in an automated voice.Â
âERROR: REBOOTING. ERROR: REBO - ERROR - ERROR - ERROR -â
Flailing about in a mad fumble of arms and legs, Fudgeâs entire form contorted as the cube slowly pushed itself through his chest, sending electric waves of red and blue up his arms and face. His expression shifted between the dead, unyielding stare to one of pure, unadulterated anger. The cube completely disappeared into his chest, below the armor, leaving the electric currents behind. They trailed up over his eyes, and when his face finally settled on his characteristic rage, his left eye remained blue, but the other had turned a furious shade of red. Below his feet, the world swelled, cubes from the ground erupting out and floating around him as his hands clenched outwards. He glared past Ciel towards a new figure - there he was, that bastard Dsandro, trying to hold back his fear. Where the fuck had he been this entire time? Was he that big of a coward that he wouldnât stay and fight in his own body? But the anger didnât last for long as she returned her focus to Fudge. Ophelia couldnât help but feel proud of him, how quickly he regained control.Â
âMy world now, bitch,â Fudge growled, lips curling upwards in a snarl.Â
Dsandro stammered, keeping up his precious little act even though he knew he was done for, âY-You canât just rewrite this world!! I still have penultimate control over you and your friends!!â
âTest me. I fucking dare you.â Fudge stared at Dsandro, âGo on. Summon a gun. Shoot me right now and get your world back. Letâs see if you can do it.â
Dsandro looked between Touya, Abel, Nyx, all glaring daggers through him. Dsandro clenched his fists, closed his eyes, shaky breaths escaping his lips. He gasped when nothing appeared in his arms, and he opened his eyes to find Fudge grinning.
âRight, thatâs what I thought. Shouldnât have cherry picked someone smarter than you to use as a base for your little invention. Now thenâŠerase data: Octavian Dsandro.â
âWait, you canât!!â Dsandro begged, âI donât -â
âHave a backup? Yup, I know. I also know you put everything on the line. Youâll die here,â Fudge said cheerily, âAnd by God, Iâm gonna have fun watching you go up in cute little cube particles. Bye bye!â
Dsandro opened his pathetic mouth to protest, but just as Fudge wished, his body exploded into fragments, lifting up into the air like ashes from a dying fire. It was far too quick a process for Opheliaâs liking, far too merciful, but what mattered most was that he was gone for good. The promise she made was fulfilled, and by fitting hands. Her photon saber lowered, her guard coming down for a moment before she realized that Ciel was still glitched, still phasing in and out of the world. She was bent forwards, wings stretched out enough to hide all but her legs, and the feathers turned a magnificent blue under the digital sky. Then, a scratching noise, a pop, and she straightened back up, looking much like her normal self. She glanced between everyone as if she wanted to say something, but her eyes spoke of horrors and apologies and all the unspoken things Ophelia knew she was too broken to say for now. Polaris jogged up to her, gave her a hug, and Cielâs arms wrapped around Polaris, muffled sobs escaping through T3CHN0âs background noise.
âIâm sorry about that, Ciel,â Fudge apologized, sincere and hurt, âIâm sorry to all of you. You went through hell and back for me, and IâŠfuck, none of this shouldâve happened. I made a huge mistake, and you all paid for it.â
âWhat matters now is that youâre okay,â Nyx said, âHell, Iâm sorry if I hurt you before, the stuns didnât seem like they were working and I was trying not to -â
âIâm okay. More than okay, actually,â Fudge interrupted, chuckling softly, âStructural integrity is above eighty percent, and T3CHN0âs program is in one pieceâŠor, well, thatâs not entirely true now, is itâŠâ
âWhat do you mean?â Abel asked.
âWellâŠalright, not all of you are as smart as Auntie Phel -â Ophelia rolled her eyes at that, â- so Iâll put it in laymanâs terms. In order to stop Dsandro, my program successfully fused with T3CHN0âs. Weâre one disjointed program right now, which is how Iâm retaining my conscience while also controlling the world.â
âIs thatâŠdangerous?â He pressed, âCan you unfuse if you wanted to?â
Fudge hesitated. âThatâs where Iâve got bad news. I donât think I can without compromising the integrity of my programming. AndâŠand my mim canât really handle much more than my own program at the moment.â
âYou canât leave T3CHN0,â Touya breathed, âYou canât return to your body.â
âNot yet I canât. If I got a new body that could accommodate this fusion, Iâd have no problems at all. ButâŠâ He groaned, biting his lip in frustration. âIâm sorry. IâŠI can send you all back to the real world, back to your bodies. Iâll need to do that soon since you guys still have high corruption levels, butâŠbut I have to stay here.â
âNo, no no no,â Ciel broke out of Polarisâs hug, wiping the tears from her eyes, âWeâre not leaving you. Weâll figure something out, we have to -â
âI already did,â Fudge reassured her, âListen, I wonât be dead or anything, fucking hell, just kindaâŠin limbo? I mean, all I need is a new body. I donât mind chilling out here for a little bit while someone makes that happen.â
Ophelia sniffled - wait, was she crying? Lord, maybe she was. Maybe it was hurting her more than she thought, having to say goodbye. But at least this wasnât a permanent goodbye, at least she knew there was something she could do to fix this. âYer damn right Iâll make that happen, Fudgemuffin. Auntie Phelâs fuckinâ godâs honest guarantee. Yer gonna have thâ best mim in all oâ NLA faster than a rattlesnake can shake.â
âIâm afraid I donât know what a rattlesnake is, but I promise Iâll help in whatever capacity I can,â Ciel said, âAfter all, if we were able to save Rui and provide each of the Vaeliuses with their own mimeosomes, I donât see why we canât do the same for you.â
âAnd donât worry about owing us any bocadillos,â Polaris grinned, attempting a lighthearted joke, âItâll be my treat once you come back from the dead - again. Youâre gonna set a record or somethinâ at this rate.â
Fudge managed to laugh at that. âNah, that record goes to Pongo.â
âThe dick pic guy?â
âIâm gonna make sure your bocadillo has arsenic in it when I come back.â
Fudge was joking, but Polaris didnât comment further, and Ophelia noticed that somewhere along the way, sheâd grabbed Cielâs hand, and they were still intertwined. The sight was inspiring, combined with Fudgeâs optimism. It wasnât characteristic of him, not quite, so Ophelia felt the need to probe.Â
âListen, FudgemuffinâŠyer gonâ be okay. Iâll git yer body done as fast I can.â
Fudge grinned. âI believe you, Auntie Phel. Tell Ru not to raid my Minecraft base while Iâm gone.â
Shaking her head, she went up and locked him in a big hug. He didnât return it at first, but soon, his arms wrapped around her, and they stayed like that until he eventually broke it off. Looking over Opheliaâs shoulder, Fudge called out one more time to Abel.
âTake care of the dick pic guy while Iâm gone.â
Abel raised an eyebrow. âDid he really send you one?â
âNope. But Polaris isnât gonna let me hear the end of it, and somebodyâs gotta enjoy how flustered heâll get if you call him that.â
âRight,â He nodded, âTake care, Fudge.â
Fudge observed the others, smiling wider than he ever had before. âThank you for everything. Now letâs get you back to the real world. If I come back and my bodyâs shorter than it was before, Iâll bust your kneecaps.â
There was a small chorus of chuckles. Fudge wouldnât fulfill that promise. As Opheliaâs vision went dark, she looked at him one last time, and she wondered if Toni would be proud of how far heâd come. Ophelia knew she certainly was.
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A Dance With Memory
There are no answers in the stars. There are memories in the colors. Life clings to him, desperate, wanting.
A short character exploration of Pongo as a break from T3CHN0.
Something drew him to the lucid forest one night. The fireflies whispered ancient myths in his ears, the butterflies promised lives that they had never seen, buried deep below their glass wings. The trees bent down to greet him, an extension of his will, and no creature dared to disturb his path.Â
The energy mist climbed the sky, so desperate to become constellations, so desperate to join the stars in holy matrimony. Why didnât the night accept them beyond a temporary release? What had the mists done to anger the twilight, what half-baked apology had they given for their transgressions? Thankfully they knew their quarrel was locked in the night and not with him, not with any creature of this planet. They saw his safe passage to the edge of the waterfall, overlooking a vast stretch of ocean. Stars reflected, transcribed within the waves. Yet the stars remained untouchable. Nothing could become a star, nothing could reach them.Â
Inhale. Exhale. Warm air, characteristic of this place, full of life and longing. He closed his eyes. Inhale. Exhale. His feet began to carry him along the land, and with every step, every memory that came to haunt him, the ground grasped starlight for the briefest of moments. Purples, blues, greens, pinks, reds, yellows. Not in that order, no, he would open his eyes and see there was an understanding to them. And so, the dance began.
Yellow became the past. Not his past, but equally his, an incomplete ownership. People entered his mind that he had never met, yet he knew their names, the sounds of their voices in his ears, their smiles and how they held themselves. This was a wistful feeling, a nostalgia he clinged to as tightly as life clinged to him.
Red became the war. Rings of fire scorching the earth, sending those people from his disconnected past to their graves, or in many cases sending them amongst the harsh winds of change, ashes to be scattered and forgotten with the passage of time. In a way, this was the past - orange formed below his feet as he danced, the realization apparent - but in a way, this was his present. Those rings still stood. The fires still burned. All this time, and he hadnât found a way.
Pink became his birth. A planet with one wish, a wish to live. Threats from all walks of life, threats that it couldnât face alone. A body formed, a wish passed on, a dream composed from a symphony of pain and an endless wisdom that was forged only through a ticking clock. He remembered his first kiss, the planetâs gentle gift of life entering his body, and nothing else mattered in that moment. He awoke knowing he was loved, though not by whom. Certainly not himself, the empty shell with only a dream to his name.
Green became life. The life he could never erase, the life that gripped his heart to the point where it ached and ached and drew blood from beneath his skin, the life that would sew his wounds back up and draw wounds again, the ever vicious cycle. Life would flow through his fingertips and heal the injuries of fallen friends, life would extend a mercy to them because he commanded it to be so. And yet, any commands to stop his hurting fell on deaf ears. He learned quickly that life would never be his friend. He got used to the pain and expected nothing, nothing.
Blue became the transformation, the sorrow, the pain. A need to pass life to others denied, erased from his body as quickly as heâd been given it, forced into the belly of a monochrome monster. He remembered how a bullet entered his skull and he was given a taste of freedom, metallic, a lifeless body falling backwards off a bottomless chasm into darkness, and suddenly returned to his old form as if nothing had ever transpired. He was never the same after that. He knew now what it meant to die, what it meant for life to leave him behind. He grew afraid of the chasm heâd fallen into, was the excuse he gave. In reality, he yearned for it. He stayed close to that chasm for months, and the day he finally broke free of lifeâs chains, he realized just how badly he wanted to live.
Purple became him. It became the stardust he trailed behind, the dreams of the planet that created him. It became the armor he wore, the weapons he wielded. It became the wisdom that wasnât quite his, but passed down from a nonexistent generation, and it became the words he spoke, the advice, the cries, the screams, the pleas. It became his sight, and in his eyes, the stars found a new place to call home. Somehow he had pleased them, somehow they wanted to join him. Were they friends? Temporary? Would he outlive them, or would they outlive him? Life was unkind to him for so long, and yetâŠwas it selfish? Wanting to keep living? Would he live for these stars? What would happen if the stars died before he did? What purpose would he serve then?
He stopped dancing, watched the trails of light heâd forged fade into the night. The stars swallowed them whole. He stared at the sky, the abyss, and it stared back. He had no answer for it. All his wisdom, all his pain, and he had no answer. He hoped, prayed, wished, dreamed, that perhaps the stars would approve of him simplyâŠtrying. Not succeeding, necessarily, nor failing. Trying. Trying to live as if life wasnât insistent on his living, trying to live as if life hadnât given him a predetermined reason to live.Â
The sun chased the stars away by the time he exited the lucid forest. He, an immortal man, would have to face them again someday. But for now, it was enough. He was enough.
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